IMAGE Fall 2017

FALL 2017IMAGE $5.50 BLACK BUSINESS, LEADERSHIP, EDUCATION & SOCIETY WOMAN OF POWER EDITORIAL DIRECTOR & TV HOST CAROLINE CLARKE 2017 BLACK ENTERPRISE FORGIVING WHITE PEOPLE FOR THE SIN OF SLAVERY FALL 2w01w7 •wIM.imAGaEgMeAmGAaZIgNaEOziNnLIeNoE.nCOliMne.1com

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contents 20 FALL 2017FAITH PERSPECTIVE6 FORGIVING WHITE PEOPLE Why African Americans should Forgive White People for the Sin of Slavery8 THE BELOVED COMMUNITY Addressing Societal Issues Through the Lens of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.EDUCATION11 SUPPORTING YOUR CHILDREN When External Factors Affect Student PerformanceHEALTH12 COPING WITH POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER Get the Help You Need14 EAT LIKE A CHAMP Cancer-Fighting FoodsFEATURES WHAT IT TAKES TO WIN PASTOR KIRBYJON CALDWELL18 NEW EAST SIDE SAN ANTONIO University Health System Honors the Service 26 and Legacy of Dr. Robert L.M. Hilliard20 COVER STORY Caroline Clarke shares her thoughts on what it means to be a Woman of Power and the joy of locating her biological family34 ENTREPRENEUR SPOTLIGHT 29 Q and A with business mogul and author A talk with Lloyd Gite, owner of The Gite MATHEW KNOWLES about his book, Gallery, in Houston's Historic Third Ward The DNA of AchieversEVENT COVERAGE 30 SNAPSHOTS BLACK ENTERPRISE ENTREPRENEURS SUMMIT24 Q and A with COURTNEY JOHNSON-ROSE, Chairwoman of the Greater Houston Black RELATIONSHIPS Chamber of Commerce, on the impact of the 2017 Black Enterprise Entrepreneurs Summit 32 DESTINATION WEDDING Scenes from the wedding ceremony25 Q and A with SELENA HILL, Digital Editor of Black Enterprise on the 38 PULL THAT TRIGGER influence of millennials in the marketplace Let Go of that Dead End Relationship26 KIRBYJON CALDWELL IN EVERY ISSUE Senior Pastor of Windsor Village UMC in Houston, Texas, delivers inspirational message 5 Publisher's Note to entrepreneurs on What It Takes To Win 31 Poetry FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 3

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INSIDE IMAGE STAFF YOUR PUBLISHER LIFE Diane Hannah MATTERS EDITORBLACK. LIVES. MATTER. T. Max McMillanBLACK BUSINESSES MATTER. EDITORIAL ASSISTANTBLACK CHURCHES MATTER.BLACK LEADERS MATTER. Joy McGheeBLACK COLLEGES AND UNIVERSITIES MATTER. GRAPHIC DESIGNBLACK SOCIAL ORGANIZATIONS MATTER.BLACK HISTORY MATTERS. 356 GraphixBLACK UNITY MATTERS. COVER DESIGNBLACK MENTORS MATTER. James Ben, Jr.BLACK MUSIC MATTERS. Signature Studios of HoustonBLACK PROTESTS MATTER. COVER PHOTOGRAPHYBLACK MEDIA MATTERS...You get the point. Lonnie MajorWE MATTER and that which concerns us matters. Black Enterprise ADVERTISINGSince childhood, I have always enjoyed reading articles in various Diane Hannahmagazines. My favorite magazine as a teenager was Seventeen. CONTRIBUTORSEventhough there was minimal representation of young mela-nated girls like myself, the fashion trends and features of famous Dr. Patricia Adamssingers and actors were enough to keep me engaged and looking Dr. Trevor Alexanderforward to the next month's issue. Terry Baugh Bessard With the passing of time–during my young adult years–Ebony, Carol ClayborneJet, Essence and Black Enterprise became my preferred publi- Walda Collinscations as these were, and still are, magazines that affirm Black Dr. Chanel Young-Popebeauty, Black talent, and Black intellectualism. There is a senseof pride that comes from reading stories of powerful, creative, CONTACT USsuccessful individuals who look like me. FOR LETTERS TO THE EDITOR & SUBMISSION OF MATERIALS FOR In keeping with the mission of IMAGE, our cover features Car- REVIEW OR PRINT SEND EMAIL TO:oline Clarke, Founding Editorial Director and TV Host for Women [email protected] Power, a division of Black Enterprise. Clarke gives us a glimpse TO ADVERTISE SEND EMAIL TO:into her book, Postcards from Cookie and she shares her thoughts [email protected] or callon what it means to be a Woman of Power. We have also includ-ed event coverage of the 2017 Black Enterprise Entrepreneurs 713.369.1994Summit held in Houston, Texas. Other articles on faith, health, IMAGE Magazine is published quarterly. All rightsrelationships, and more, will inspire, enlighten, and hopefully reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part withoutenourage you to stay the course and finish strong! written permission from the publisher is prohibit- ed. Articles and letters will be edited due to spaceDiane Hannah limitations as necessary. The views expressed inPublisher any story or column in this publication are those of the individual writers and do not necessarily reflect those of the publisher or advertisers. The publisher is not responsible for errors in advertising copy. IMAGE Magazine reserves the right to reject any article, photograph, or advertisement for any reason. IMAGE Magazine will not be held liable for services or products advertised in IMAGE. All product names, brand names, and trademarks may belong to their respective holders. Printed in the USA. IMAGE Magazine is committed to providing editorial content that is relevant to the inter- ests of the Black community with the intent to inspire each reader to use their gifts, talents, and resources to make a positive impact in the world. FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 5

FAITH PERSPECTIVE DR. BARBARA WILLIAMS-SKINNER on why forgiving white people for theenslavement of our ancestors is necessary for the advancement of the black community. By DIANE HANNAH SKINNER: It will take black people forgiving white people so we can move on. Forgiveness is obedience to the Word of God. The Word of God says in Matthew 6:14 that if you do not forgive, you will not be forgiven. There is some baggage and bondage that we are in that we shouldn’t be in because we are holding on to this an- ger and rage which we’re turning on ourselves. A lot of violence in the African American community−domestic violence and hate of a person that looks like you−comes from this bondage. Light skin vs. dark skin. Degree vs. no degree. Poor against rich. Northern vs. Southern. This is all baggage from the past. Forgiveness and ad- vancing the black community go hand in hand, so we would be the greatest benefactors. Forgiving others is not saying what they did was right; it is obeying God who will take care of them for what they did. That’s what forgiveness is. IMAGE: How do we do that? How do we forgive them, and do you agree that it’s easier said than done? SKINNER: Oh, absolutely! In my own personal experience, for- giving a father who abandoned me couldn’t be done without the power of God. You have to acknowledge that you’re hurt and then literally give that hurt to God–the only One who can handle it. Then you’re released to go and become who God has destined you to be. It is hard, and it’s impossible to do it without the power of the Holy Spirit.IMAGE: I read your article in the Huffington Post, Racial IMAGE: Do you believe that unforgiveness has hindered theEquality in America: Fact or Fiction. In the article, you stated, progress of African Americans?“America’s greatest threat comes from within. That threat is SKINNER: Absolutely! Notwithstanding that, God is faithful,the unresolved, unreconciled, unrepented, unforgiven and un- and He has advanced so much through us–the building of our his-restituted enslavement of humans.” Why do you believe the torically black colleges, our organizations, our service groups, andinstitution of slavery remains unrestituted? the like. He has used us mightily to advance His Kingdom, butSKINNER: Because it would cost too much for those who ben- imagine how much more we could do. Unforgiveness keeps usefit. There is privilege whether people are sons and daughters of from trusting each other and from using that 1.2 trillion dollars ofslave owners or not. White privilege is a reality, and why would our spending power to build more schools and more communityyou give up that privilege? The right thing to do is to fight against centers and from making sure our businesses are funded. Unfor-it because it’s demonic, and it doesn’t come from the throne of giveness is hurting us in every way.God; it comes from the pit. It takes white people acknowledgingwhat they did−not what they personally did, but what their people did. IMAGE: Systemic racism continues to permeate the fabric of American society. How do we forgive the past while facingIMAGE: How will forgiving white people for the sin of slavery ben- the current realities and injustices that are still perpetuatedefit us? against African Americans? SKINNER: If someone does something wrong to me, I can re- lease that to God without agreeing with the wrong. I’m still fight- ing against injustice. I’m still mobilizing African Americans to resist in every way. I’m not agreeing with evil. What I’m doing is releasing the spirit of unforgiveness from me personally so I can go on, but I’m resisting evil with everything I have. Today,6 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

“So as long as America doesn’t acknowledge its sin of racial injustice from enslavement, as long as it doesn’t begin to right the wrong and pay restitution−because that’s what you pay when you are wrong−then ”white America is hurt as well.the evils still continue. Even after I resist, I need to pray without by making our voices heard on behalf of the poor–we should beceasing because God can deal with an attorney general who’s try- doing that. We should be meeting with somebody about justiceing to roll back voting rights. Some of these people are going to over at the Department of Justice. We should be finding out whatjail, but we’ve got to be praying. We’ve got to trust that God is they’re doing with small businesses. We should be making suregoing to handle them. He will handle our business if we handle that our HBCU’s are not hurt. We should be vigilant. And if we’reHis business. following the Word of God, we should be praying for them be- cause the Bible doesn’t say pray for Republicans or Democrats; itIMAGE: In the article, you also mentioned efforts to label says pray for leaders that there be peace in the land. We should beAmerica as “post-racial”. Do you believe that America is advancing the agenda of those facing injustice, and we should also“post-racial”? be praying for this president that God would turn his stony heartSKINNER: America will be post-racial when it’s post-racist. No, into a heart of flesh.we are not post-racial because we are not post-racist. IMAGE: Although we are no longer physically enslaved, do youIMAGE: Do you believe America will ever be post-racist? believe that in some ways African Americans are still in mentalSKINNER: That’s the process of biblical reconciliation−identi- bondage?fying those whites and others who are actually working with us to SKINNER: We are in bondage as long as we are not completelybegin building greater bonds of unity by fighting against systemic surrendered to the Lord God Almighty to be everything He’s calledinjustices including the criminal justice system, healthcare system, us to be. So, in that sense, yes. The laws of the 13th, 14th, and 15theducation, housing, and the like. But our challenge and our charge Amendments and the civil rights laws made us free as citizens−asfor God is Matthew 25. We are responsible for the poor in our voting citizens−but not equal. We’re not in jail and in shackles,communities; we act as though this is white people’s problem. All but we’re not considered equal. You go to buy a house and youblack people are not poor; 40% of us are in the middle class, so might get a different price than a white person. That’s inequality,what are we doing to move our people from the bottom up? but you’re free.IMAGE: You referred to inequality as a “spiritual cancer on IMAGE: What should the message of parents, spiritual lead-America’s soul”. How so? ers, educators, and other leaders be to our youth in this racistSKINNER: Because you can’t perpetuate evil without it falling climate?on you. It’s like a prison guard. As long as he’s holding the gate SKINNER: We should help our young people realize that there isshut, he has to stay there to keep it shut. So as long as America no limit to what they can do and be by teaching them their history.doesn’t acknowledge its sin of racial injustice from enslavement, We should help them understand how we got over. Most blackas long as it doesn’t begin to right the wrong and pay restitution– parents and grandparents aren’t even telling their children how webecause that’s what you pay when you are wrong–then white survived slavery–how resilient we were, how awesome we were,America is hurt as well. They are fearful; they are hurt by fear and how we got through post-emancipation, how we built extraordi-by the violence of black people who attack white people–you don’t nary institutions that are still alive today. We should help themknow if you’re the next person to be attacked, and you can’t get understand how magnificent they are; they come from resilientbehind enough gated communities to deal with that. There’s such people. We must give them a sense of identity and confidence soa rage in the black community, and we’re turning it on ourselves. they believe that they can do anything.But also, those among us who are so angry and can’t corral thatrage are turning it against white people. Therefore, the cancer is Dr. Barbara Williams-Skinner is President and Co-Founder of thehurting both the victim and those who cause the cancer. Skinner Leadership Institute. She is a public strategist, author, faith and community leader, and educator. Dr. Williams-SkinnerIMAGE: Regarding the current president of the United States, has served as Executive Director of the Congressional Black Cau-what should be the mindset and posture of African Americans? cus and was appointed by President Barack Obama to the WhiteSKINNER: The posture of African Americans should be the same House Fait7h Council for Faith-Based and Public Partnerships.as it is with any president. Do we have an agenda? What is our For more information about Dr. Williams-Skinner, visit:agenda? We still have to advance God’s Kingdom–I’m talking www.skinnerleadership.org.about black Christians. We still have to advance God’s Kingdom FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 7

BELOVEDTHEFAITH PERSPECTIVE COMMUNITY Through the Lens of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. By DR. TREVOR ALEXANDERIn the last edition of IMAGE, I mention- points as barriers to building “The Beloved Community” −although not mentioned by ed Dr. King’s “Beloved Community” Community”; all three of these entities are Dr. King but engrained in the community− as a blueprint to be examined as what form the vicious cycle of violence. is the spirit of Ubuntu. Ubuntu is a South a possible solution, or at the very This is a good starting point towards African word that invokes the spirit of least, used as part of the solution reconciliation. community and humanity. The meaning ofto help bring peace to our communities. Ubuntu is, “I am because we are.” WhenIt is worth mentioning that Dr. King was We might not agree on all three of Dr. we use this principle, we invoke a sensenot the first to coin the phrase “Beloved King’s points of the “Triple Evils”, and we of community and brotherly and sisterlyCommunity”. Josiah Royce, a 20th century don’t have to. Prayerfully, we can agree on love. It is the collective responsibility forphilosopher and theologian who founded at least one point as our common ground. us all. This phase also requires a change inThe Fellowship of Reconciliation of which Finding common ground means being attitude. For some, their community is “myDr. King was a member, was the first to use willing to enter into meaningful dialogue. I four and no more”. At this level, I mustthis term, but it was Dr. King who made it must add, meaningful dialogue is not always expand my thinking and my philosophy,popular. pretty, but it is essential. be willing to examine my values, and make some readjustments if necessary. At this Dr. King spent time laying out his plans Jesus stated that God will not forgive our phase, to paraphrase Dr. King, “Opposers arefor “The Beloved Community”, but sadly, sins if we do not forgive those who sin transformed into friends.”he didn’t live long enough to implement against us (Matt. 6:14-15, Mark 11:25). Manythe foundations of his plans. This is what of us recite this nightly in our prayers, It is at this point that I hear the GospelDr. King said it takes to build “The Beloved but do we practice it? If we truly practice of Matthew 5:44 calling out to me. In theCommunity”: this portion of the Lord’s Prayer, then Sermon on the Mount, Jesus proclaims that forgiveness and reconciliation work like a we should “…Love your enemies, bless “But the end is reconciliation; glove−you need both to make it work. them that curse you...”. This is a hard step. the end is redemption; the end is the With the spirit of Ubuntu as the backdrop, creation of the beloved community. During our reconciliation stage,we are active- we have to execute what Jesus told Peter to It is this type of spirit and this type ly working to heal broken conditions and do in John 21—show “Agape Love” which of love that can transform opposers attitudes. This is where dialogue becomes is “unconditional love”. This kind of love is crucial. To heal broken relationships, I must not shallow but deeply embedded into our into friends. It is this type of listen to the pain of others, and yes, take spiritual DNA. When we love someone, understanding and good will that will responsibility for the pain that I may have we make a conscious effort to treat them transform the deep gloom of the old caused. Also, the offended/wounded party with the uttermost respect and honor that has to be willing to listen to me, hear transcends differences and/or deficiencies age into the exuberant gladness my confession, and allow me to offer an we may see in them. The principle of of the new age. It is the love which explanation even if it falls short of the Agape love is much the same, but we are offended/wounded person’s desires or expec- called to not just love the “likeable”, we will bring about miracles...” tations. Often, the explanation is more for are also called to love the “unlikable”. Yes, the one giving it, than the one receiving it. and to even love our enemies. According to Dr. King, first, is the idea of It is important to remember that the end goal isreconciliation. While working towards recon- reconciliation; it is equally important to note Finally, in building “The Beloved Commu-ciliation, we must tackle the issues that he that this process will take time. nity”, we must work towards redemption. Icalled “Triple Evils of Poverty, Racism,and Militarism”. Dr. King saw these three The second part of building “The Beloved8 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

“To build the Beloved Community we must be willing to continue the mission of humanity, to explore new and all possibilities towardestablishing a loving community, to seek out people of like-minded attitude and spirit, and to boldly go where only a few in our society have barely scratched the surface.”want to build this stage on two scriptures: with the end result being redemption— “.....in Dr. King’sGalatians 6:1-5, “Brothers, if anyone is meaning, a purchased community that is Beloved Community,caught in any transgression, you who are configured on the biblical notion that evilspiritual should restore him in a spirit of will not be given the opportunity to raise its hunger, poverty,gentleness. . . Bear one another’s burdens, ugly head−a community that functions in and homelessnessand so fulfill the law of Christ.” and the true spirit of brotherly and sisterly love. are not tolerated,Proverbs 27:6, “Faithful are the wounds ofa friend.” It is noteworthy to express that in Dr. and special King’s Beloved Community, hunger, poverty, attention What is redemption? According to vocab- and homelessness are not tolerated, and is given to theulary.com, “Redemption comes from the special attention is given to the human human dignityLatin word redimere, a combination of dignity of all people. These are societal of all people.”re(d)-, meaning “back” and emere, meaning issues that we must also address to make“buy”. Redemption is what some people this community “Beloved”.claim happens to your soul when you’resaved from evil forces.” When we marry I close with this parting thought of thethis up to “The Beloved Community”, we opening monologue from Star Trek (with asee a biblical fit. We are all created to be few modifications). To build “The Belovedone, and Jesus prayed that same prayer in Community” we must be willing to continueJohn 17:21 when he said,“That they all the mission of humanity, to explore newmay be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and and all possibilities toward establishingI in thee, that they also may be one in us.” a loving community, to seek out people of like-minded attitude and spirit, and to Joss Whedon said, “Redemption is some- boldly go where only a few in our societything you have to fight for in a very have barely scratched the surface.personal, down-and-dirty way. Some ofour characters lose that, some stray from Dr. Trevor Alexander is Pastor ofthat, and some regain it.” Like the other True Vine Christian Fellowship intwo stages, the work of redemption will not San Antonio, Texas and a Professorbe easy. At this stage, we have to employ of Religion at the University of themutual accountability. We have to be willing Incarnate Word.to hold each other accountable for ouractions; otherwise, we might repeat badbehaviors that may fracture our concept of“The Beloved Community”. Why is mutual accountability important?Like I once heard someone say, “It’s hardto trust the same flame that burnt your handto warm you.” Mutual accountability offersus the opportunity to work on our oneness FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 9

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EDUCATION WHEN EXTERNAL FACTORS AFFECT STUDENT PERFORMANCEHOW PARENTS CAN SUPPORT THEIR CHILDREN By CAROL CLAYBORNEIt wasn’t until halfway through I have first-hand experience on how It took years of intercessory prayer my third year of teaching that debilitating personal concerns can be in on the part of family members and a I had an epiphany. Though an academic setting. I graduated high handful of new medical treatments be- slightly smaller than the aver- school in the top 10% of my class. As fore my legs recovered, and by 2006, age first-grader, Curtis, in spite soon as I entered college, I became I completed two sprint triathlons. Itof my best efforts, had managed to overwhelmed with worry concerning the took an additional few years and a fewconsistently distract and antagonize health of my father. This, compounded counseling sessions offered throughhis classmates to the point of alterca- by the stress of being away from home my job before I had the courage to taketion. This particular day after redirec- on a college campus where I struggled the Graduate Record Exam (GRE) intion, he returned to his seat and curled to find good friends and a place to fit 2010. I began graduate school with theup in a ball–arms clasped around his in, made studying an act of futility. I re- weight of my past trials ̶ assault, rejec-legs refusing to work. By the time I had tained very little but tried to carry on. tion, depression, and some anxiety.  Icrossed the room to speak with him Later in 1994, I began a battle with a moved in with my mother while com-again, all the previous anger in his face neuropathic attack on my limbs. In ad- pleting my program in San Antonio withhad given way to a strange stillness. He dition, the death of my paternal grand- the intent of helping her wherever andcalmly looked up at me–eyes wide father in July 1994 and that of my father however I could, but she turned the ta-open ̶ and said, “My little brother died.” in November 1994 brought my aca- bles on me and immediately set aboutI was speechless. After a short pause, demic progress to a halt. I completed rebuilding what life had taken away.he continued, “I miss my little brother a my undergraduate degree in 1996–twolot.” Suddenly, it all made sense. years too late for my father to attend Almost daily, she told me how smart, and a full 6 years beyond the average creative, energetic, caring, beautiful, and After 10 years of teaching diverse student. I felt like a total failure.  blessed beyond measure I was.  Shestudent populations where the fi- regularly told me how blessed her lifenances, faces, and cognitive abilities “Students’ cries for was with me in her home, and when Ichanged each year, one thing remained left for school in the mornings she stoodconstant–no group was immune to help in the form of low on the porch smiling, waving, and wish-life-stressors which negatively impact- academic performance, ing me a great day as I pulled out of theed their chances of succeeding both in fighting, bullying, and a driveway. I also began attending a spirit-and outside of the classroom. When I general lack of respect led Bible-based church where I not onlybegan teaching, my goal was simple: found acceptance, but responsibility aschange the world one child at a time. for each other make a short term small group leader. Lead-However, as time progressed, the num- daily instruction a ing the women’s group was difficultber of students with challenges similar challenge at best and while working and attending graduateto those of Curtis increased to almost school full-time, but the pastor’s faitha third of the room. Students’ cries for ” completely ineffective in me along with his wife’s encourage-help in the form of low academic perfor- at worst. ment and the participants' testimoniesmance, fighting, bullying, and a gener- fueled me to complete my assignment.al lack of respect for each other make In addition, I attended a weekend retreatdaily instruction a challenge at best and that focused on addressing issues that leadcompletely ineffective at worst.  (continued on page 36) FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 11

PTSDHEALTH POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER DR. PATRICIA ADAMS offers ways to cope with life-changing circumstances.As a psychotherapist, I’ve been It is important to understand that each of recognized His need to be alone as well as frequently asked, “How do us has a different level of vulnerability to His need to connect with others. When you think people are dealing this type of anxiety response based upon Jesus was facing His darkest hour, He sur- with everything that has hap- several variables. Some research indicates rounded Himself with His closest friends. pened?” The answer is rather that our genetic make-up determines the Although many suffering from symptomssimplistic: People’s response to traumatic way we react to stressful situations. Indi- of PTSD tend to withdraw, this is the timeevents varies a great deal. I’ve spoken with viduals already predisposed to depression to seek and deliver appropriate and ongo-many people who have responded with a and/or anxieties are at greater risk of de- ing communication and support.deeper since of faith and a resolve to carry veloping PTSD. Stress is also cumulative.on. Some have responded to these recent Therefore, if a person was already dealing Take care of self. Under stress, we hu-events with many questions and uncer- with a great deal of stress and anxiety prior mans have a tendency to do things thattainties―it has challenged their belief in to the attack, that person may have few- provide temporary relief but ultimatelyGod. Others have responded with classic er psychological resources with which to cause greater pain. Alcohol, smoking, andpost trauma symptoms. cope. Having a good support network can unhealthy relationships may cause us to buffer us from developing PTSD following feel better momentarily, but they can ulti- As a mental health provider, I have seen such an occurrence. Therefore, individuals mately add to our stress. Adequate sleep,an increased number of clients suffering who are more isolated may be at greater exercise, and nutrition may not provide afrom symptoms of Post-traumatic Stress risk of developing a more severe reaction quick fix, but they will buffer us from stressDisorder (PTSD). In simple terms, PTSD to stressful events. and anxiety. In addition, avoid making life-is defined as a disorder that results from long decisions under stress. Often, peoplea person experiencing or witnessing an Regardless of the cause, there are several make rash decisions (spending money im-event involving actual or threatened death approaches to help you or someone you pulsively, hasty marriages) because theyor injury. This event is re-experienced know who is suffering from PTSD symp- sense that the end is near. Such importantthrough intense recollections, recurrent toms: decisions should never be made underdreams, or feeling as though the event was stress. Maintain a balanced life.actually happening. There is significant dis- Be clear about what you can and can’ttress caused by things that symbolize or control. When information begins to fuel Recognize and embrace your limits. Howresemble the event. An individual tries to people’s daily fears and anxieties, I rec- we think about situations can have anavoid things that remind him or her of that ommend that clients limit the amount of enormous effect on the way we cope.particular event. There may be a detach- time they spend watching news coverage. When helping clients process difficult is-ment from others and diminished interest Giving oneself permission to take a break sues, I work specifically with their feelings,or participation in activities. Finally, the from the news is a healthy way to take behaviors, and thoughts. Or better yet, theperson may experience trouble sleeping, time out from the stressors of daily living. ABC’s of life:more irritability, trouble concentrating, We cannot control what others do, but we A – Affects/feelingsand a sense of hyper vigilance (the feeling can control the remote control button. B – Behaviors/actionsof constantly being on guard). This type of C – Cognition/thoughtsresponse can cause significant difficulty Connect with others. Be specific with oth- It is imperative to understand the naturewith daily functioning. ers about the need to connect. Even Jesus12 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

\"Formal therapy with a trained professional may be warranted if symptoms of depression and anxiety impair your ability to perform necessary \"daily activities.of all three; they are the driving forces ofour lives.Find comfort in the peace of God. WhenJesus talked with His disciples about thetime He would no longer be with them, Hepromised them peace although He knewthat the world would not be peaceful. Thepeace of God is not determined by thecircumstances of our sinful world, but bydrawing comfort from God who promisesthat He will be with us always.Finally, seek help in difficult times. In seek-ing help there is strength and not weak-ness. Informal therapy with a friend maybe just the catalyst you need to help youmove forward. On the other hand, formaltherapy with a trained professional maybe warranted if symptoms of depressionand anxiety impair your ability to performnecessary daily activities. Medication maybe necessary as additional intervention. Areferral to a primary care physician or psy-chiatrist should also be considered. When experiencing PTSD, do not sufferalone. Seek help to get on the path to over-coming tramatizing circumstances.Dr. Patricia E. Adams is a Licensed Marriage& Family Therapist in San Antonio, Texasand owner of Zeitgeist Wellness Group. Formore information, visitzwgroup.biz. FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 13

October is breast cancer The Center for Disease Control (CDC) By WALDA COLLINS awareness month, but more supports various programs which are than focusing on having designed to prevent or control cancer. undergo an annual screening. After the awareness in October, is These programs provide quality breast age of 55, it is recommended that a bi- the power of educational and cervical cancer screening, better ennial exam be conducted. awareness year-round to help prevent treatment, and programs that help with cancer. There is a unique and powerful lowering the risk of cancer. According Although there may be slight vari- way to bring health and healing through to the CDC, more than 200,000 wom- ances when it comes to a particular the foods we eat. Nutritional guidance en get breast cancer every year, and age group based on certain agencies, is a key factor when it comes to raising more than 40,000 women die from the what’s most important is that a mam- awareness. disease. For women ages 40 to 49, the mography be conducted on an annual Breast cancer is the second most CDC recommends that you talk with basis. Women should have the oppor- common kind of cancer in women. To your doctor about when to start getting tunity to receive mammograms as early date, approximately 1 in 8 women in mammograms and how often. Women as age 40 according to the ACS. The the U.S. will undergo the trauma of get- ages 50 to 74 should get a mammo- main goal is early detection in order to ting breast cancer. But, there is good gram once every 2 years and may also reduce the amount of deaths caused news! If detected early enough, many choose to get them more often. Accord- by breast cancer. The American Can- women can survive. Breast cancer is ing to the American Cancer Society cer Society reveals that in the United treatable with appropriate and timely (ACS), it is strongly recommended that States there are over 2.8 million breast intervention. women between the ages of 45 to 54 cancer survivors to include women cur- rently undergoing treatment and those who have completed treatment. Breast cancer won't be prevented14 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

through screenings; however, knowing with cancer-fighting nutrients such as be- one has been shown to be highly effec-the facts can help detect and fight the ta-carotene; it contains ten times the be- tive at protecting cells against free radicaldisease. If you’re not sure where to get ta-carotene of broccoli which is known for damage; detoxifying foreign substancesscreened, check out your local clinic or being rich in beta-carotene. Research including carcinogens, and boostinghospital. Be sure to talk with your doc- shows that premenopausal women the immune system by influencing lym-tor or health care provider about the who consume at least 2 servings of be- phocytes. Furthermore, asparagus is abest breast cancer screening options ta-carotene rich foods such as carrots fairly good source of beta-carotene andfor you and schedule an appointment. and kale per day have 17% lower risk vitamin C. As an additional bonus, this of developing breast cancer. As a result exceptional plant is typically low in pes-HOW TO KNOW IF YOU’RE AT RISK of kale’s high content of beta-carotene, ticides, even the non-organically grownFOR BREAST CANCER: as well as a number of other anti-ox- asparagus. idant vitamins and phytonutrients, this• Changes in breast cancer-related green leafy vegetable is at the top of 4. Salmon genes (BRCA1 or BRCA2) the list of vegetables with the highest Packed with omega-3 fatty acids, salm- ORAC rating. ORAC or Oxygen Radi- on is an excellent anti-cancer food.• Having your first menstrual period cal Absorbance Capacity is a measure Research suggests that omega-3 fat- before age 12 of the total antioxidant power of foods. ty acids which are often in short sup- ply in Western diets, can  inhibit the• Never giving birth or being older WALDA COLLINS growth of breast tumors. In addition to when your first child is born omega-3 fatty acids, salmon delivers 2. Garlic an abundance of astaxanthin―anoth-• Starting menopause after age 55 A double blind randomized study with er anti-cancer nutrient. Astaxanthin, a over 3,000 human subjects for seven carotenoid that gives salmon its pink• Taking hormones to replace missing clinical years showed that cancer risk color, is an extremely powerful antiox- estrogen and progesterone in meno- was cut by 60% for those with the high- idant. To get the most astaxanthin, opt pause for more than five years est intake of allium containing vegeta- for wild salmon; astaxanthin has been bles, including aged garlic.The miracle reported to be much more concentrat-• Oral contraceptives (birth control pills) nutrient appears to be the enzyme al- ed in wild salmon (especially in sock- linase (a nutrient in the allium genus) eye salmon) than in farmed salmon.• A personal history of breast cancer, which produces the anti-cancer com- Furthermore, wild salmon contains only dense breasts, or some other breast pounds. The key is to crush it, and low levels of polychlorinated biphenyls problems let it sit for 15 minutes in order to re- (PCBs), harmful chemicals that are of- lease these anti-cancer compounds. ten found in high quantities in farmed• A family history of breast cancer (par- salmon. That said, moderation should ent, sibling, or child) 3. Asparagus be the key in the consumption of wild Asparagus is one of the best dietary salmon. Too much high consumption of• Getting radiation therapy to the breast sources of glutathione, a ‘master an- salmon and other fish may predispose or chest tioxidant’ that has gained the spotlight you to an excessive amount of certain in recent years. Glutathione appears toxins (e.g. mercury and pesticides).• Being overweight, especially after to have widespread functions, many of The FDA recommends eating fish no menopause which may contribute to a reduced risk more than twice a week. This advice of breast cancer. For instance, glutathi- is particularly important for pregnant In our quest to truly fight breast can- women and women who are planningcer or any disease, we have to under- to become pregnant because the tox-stand that food is medicine. Consum- ins in fish can impair the neurologicaling some of the best foods can have development of the unborn baby.a preventive measure that reduces therisk of breast cancer by 60-70% while 5. Green Teaboosting the immune system and keep- Green tea is famous for its weight lossing your risks minimal. Although there is promoting properties, but the  healthno food that cures breast cancer, here benefits of green tea are more variedare several of the greatest super-foods than that. Evidence suggests that greenrecommended that have cancer-fight- tea may also help prevent many typesing properties: of cancer, including breast cancer. Catechins, the same compounds that1. Kale are responsible for green tea’s weightThe health benefits of kale are wide and loss promoting properties, have beenvaried, but when it comes to foods that shown to be highly effective at protect-pack an anti-cancer punch, it is almost ing cells against DNA damage causedimpossible to beat kale. Kale is packed by free radicals. But the beneficial FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 15

effects of green tea do not end there. your health by being aware of the facts “KnowingGreen tea has also been shown to sup- and taking steps to reduce the risks of whatpress urokinase, a type of enzyme that breast cancer. Knowing what to eat canis typically overactive in breast cancer lead to a life of health and healing along to eat canpatients. Urokinase is likely to play with greater results of energy, balance, lead to a lifea key role in cancer cell metastasis and a refined lifestyle. Healthy eating of health and(spreading). When buying green tea, habits lead to qualities that make you healing alongchoose loose tea leaves instead of feel more and more like a champion. with greatertea bags as the release of catechins So go on and fight like a girl, but eatis better from loose leaves. You may like a champ! results ofalso want to add a bit of lemon juice or energy,other vitamin C rich juice to your tea; Sources:research suggests that vitamin C can www.cancer.org balance, andincrease the amount of catechins avail- www.cdc.gov a refinedable for the body to absorb. www.breastcancer.org lifestyle.” www.prevention.com6. MushroomsThere are a number of mushrooms that Walda Collins is a twenty-three yearappear to help the body fight cancer Marine Corps veteran, faith & life enthu-and build the immune system such as siast, writer, personal chef, and healthShiitake, Reishi, Maitake, and many coach. She is the owner of Strategicmore. These mushrooms contain pow- AlignMint. For more information, visit:erful compounds that build the immune strategicalignment.comsystem. They have a protein calledlecithin which unleashes an attack oncancer cells and keeps them from mul-tiplying. Your health matters! Take control of16 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 17

NEW Dr. Robert L.M. HilliardUNIVERSITYHEALTH leadership positions, including a term on SYSTEM the San Antonio City Council in the 70s,LOCATION president of the National Medical Asso-WILL HONOR A ciation, and president of the Texas StatePIONEERING Board of Medical Examiners. He receivedPHYSICIAN many significant honors and awards, in-�We are proud to honor cluding the Ashbel Smith DistinguishedDr. Hilliard’s service and legacy as Alumnus Award from the UT Medical we deepen our roots on San Branch in 1991.Antonio’s East Side by offeringfamilies a state-of-the-art health The idea to name the new East Side health center after the distinguished physician be- center close to home.” gan with Bexar County Commissioner for -IRA SMITH Precinct 4, Tommy Calvert. “Dr. Hilliard wasMaking good on a prom- deeply committed to his patients and his ise to invest in improving tonio Housing Authority, or SAHA, which community,” said Commissioner Calvert at the health of residents provided the land for the new health cen- the official groundbreaking ceremony on on San Antonio’s East ter that will bear his name. October 18, 2016. The only other Univer- Side, University Health sity Health System location named after an In 1956, Dr. Hilliard became the third black individual is the Robert B. Green campus, student to earn a medical degree from the which opened in 1917 as the Robert B. Green Memorial Hospital, in memory of aSystem began construction last October University of Texas Medical Branch in Gal- former Bexar County Judge. Coincidentally, Dr. Hilliard was born at the Robert B. Greenon the Dr. Robert L.M. Hilliard Center, a veston. After serving as a flight surgeon hospital.25,000-square-foot, state-of-the-art family in the Air Force, he came home to San “We are proud to honor Dr. Hilliard’s ser-healthcare center. Antonio to complete his residency at theDr. Robert L. M. Hilliard, who passed Robert B. Green. A press release issued inaway in 2014 at the age of 83, had deep 1962 by the Bexar County Hospital Districtand profound ties to the East Side commu- announced his appointment as the firstnity where he practiced obstetrics and gy- black physician in the South to becomenecology. He delivered more than 14,000 chief resident of obstetrics-gynecology atbabies over the course of his career. a major teaching hospital. NewspapersHe also had significant ties to the two across the country picked up the story.organizations that came together to make Dr. Hilliard ran into resistance and racismthis new family health center a reality— from both colleagues and patients. But likeUniversity Health System and the San An- many pioneers, he opened doors for thosetonio Housing Authority. Dr. Hilliard was who followed.the first African-American physician to He was a mentor to many young peo-receive specialty training at the Robert B. ple—serving as clinical associate professorGreen Memorial Hospital, the birthplace at The University of Texas Health Scienceof the University Health System mission. Center for much of his career. Over theHe was also a past-chairman of the San An- decades, he held many public service and18 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

vice and legacy as we deepen our roots on “It’s really tual interests and goals. And our vision toSan Antonio’s East Side by offering families impossible to improve health access and health outcomesa state-of-the-art health center close to measure the is perfectly aligned with SAHA’s vision forhome,” said Bexar County Hospital District impact he had transformation and revitalization,” said GeorgeBoard of Managers Vice Chair Ira Smith, on the lives of B. Hernández, Jr., University Health SystemJr. “It’s really impossible to measure the his patients, President/CEO. “Together, we are commit-impact he had on the lives of his patients, the babies he ted to making a positive difference for thisthe babies he brought into this world, brought into this community and the people who live here.”and the many students and physicians he world, and thementored,“ added Dr. Dianna Burns-Banks, many students “Without our health we have nothing,” saidBoard of Managers Secretary. “We are de- and physicians Dr. Morris Stribling, Chairman of the SAHAlighted to be partnering with SAHA to cre- he mentored.” Board. “At this location, individuals andate a center that will be worthy of the Uni- families will have access to the servicesversity Health System and Hilliard names.” -Dr. Dianna Burns-Banks and health education resources needed to tackle the health problems plaguing The Hilliard Center, located on a 2-acre par- this community such as obesity, diabetes,cel of land provided by SAHA, is strategi- heart disease, prematurity and asthma.”cally located and provides opportunity forfuture growth. The partnership between The Hilliard Center property is located inthe health system and the local housing an area designed as a Promise Zone byauthority is an innovative one with signif- the U.S. Department of Housing and Ur-icant funding for construction and equip- ban Development. San Antonio is thement coming from the Texas 1115 Medic- only community in the nation to receive aaid Waiver. The Waiver’s Delivery System Promise Zone designation, as well as threeReform Incentive Payment program en- White House Neighborhood Revitalizationables health organizations like University Initiative grants to bolster children’s edu-Health System to receive federal funding cational achievement, foster communityfor projects that will result in improved ac- development, and improve safety and security.cess and outcomes for patients. The $5 million center will open in December “The best partnerships are founded on mu- and serve as a prototype for future Univer- sity Health System outpatient clinical locations. FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 19

PHOTO By LONNIE MAJOR20 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

CAROLINE CLARKEThe roles were reversed—this time, Caroline Clarke was the one answering the questions. As Editorial Director of the Black Enterprise Women of Power Summit and Host ofWomen of Power TV, interviewing women of power is just one of her many responsibilities. Clarke sat down with IMAGE during the Black Enterprise Entrepreneurs Summit heldin Houston to discuss what it means to be a woman of power, and she talks about her most recent book, Postcards From Cookie. A wife, mother, author, and positive role model, Caroline Clarke is a woman of power in her own right.By DIANE HANNAHIMAGE: How long have you been employed by Black Enterprise?CLARKE: I started at Black Enterprise about 24 years ago. I've heldmany positions over the years.IMAGE: How long have you been in your current position?CLARKE: I’ve been the Editorial Director of Women of Power sinceit was launched 12 years ago.IMAGE: Why was Women of Power launched? Caroline Clarke interviewing Patti LaBelle and Yolanda AdamsCLARKE: We had never done a women’s brand, but we knew that at the 2017 Black Enterprise Entrepreneurs Summit.when we put women on the cover, the magazine sold out. As in-creasing numbers of women came out of college and grad school IMAGE: Tell me about the Women of Power Summit.and flooded into entrepreneurship and the corporate arena, that CLARKE: The Women of Power Summit is an extraordinary annualsegment of our market was exploding, and they wanted more event. It will be held again March 7th thru 10th, 2018, at the Yachtfrom us. We launched Women of Power to speak directly to wom- Club in Disney World in Orlando, Florida. The Women of Poweren entrepreneurs and women in corporate America about how Summit was created to bring like-minded women of color togeth-to advance their careers, and it took off like quickfire from the er. It was created in response to the fact that women of color arebeginning, and we’re so very proud of that. very isolated–isolated in their company, in their industry–depending on the industry, and isolated geographically; they’ve moved forIMAGE: How do you define a woman of power? jobs, and it’s lonely. Isolation can diminish you and demoralizeCLARKE: I think, most importantly, a woman of power knows who you; it can make you forget how great you are. The women whoshe is. She’s very self-possessed and very authentic; she’s not try- attend are largely from the corporate sector. They are given toolsing to be anybody else. She understands what her gifts and talents that they need to really vault in their careers–to reach the abso-are. She understands what she doesn’t know and how to get that lute pinnacle of their careers. It gives them a place to connect,information. A woman of power believes in herself, in other wom- commiserate, comfort one another, cheer for one another, shareen, and the notion that there is enough for all of us. She’s not just their stories, and get the feedback they need­from other womenout there doing it for herself; she’s also supporting and uplifting who have faced the same thing. They learn how to confront theothers. FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 21

issues and hurdles they are facing–how to get through what they buy her a car or a trip as a graduation gift. She had never been onare going through. They learn how to negotiate their next raise, a plane, so she chose the trip. She went to Europe by herself withhow to deal with a boss who has never met a Black person before a student visa in the late 1940’s, and spent 2 months travelingand doesn’t know what to do with them, how to deal with issues around Europe. That’s just so courageous. My mother was a greatthey are facing at home and so much more. The women address role model. I’m always amazed by people who have the courageissues such as how to have a job that requires travel all over the to step out of everything they know and blow the walls off theirworld when they have children they are raising at home. It’s a full comfort zone. I also had an amazing aunt–my mother’s only sis-myriad of things that working women face as we really strive to ter. She pursued everything she wanted to do. With examples likenot just be our best selves but create the best outcomes for the that, it’s hard to fail. I am who I am because of everything thatpeople we love–our children, parents, siblings, and our commu- was poured into me. They gave me everything they had; I don’tnities. mean materially, but spiritually, academically, and intellectually so I would know what I needed to do to succeed.IMAGE: How can women be more supportive of one another andour ventures? IMAGE: I'm sure your daughter has benefited from what was pouredCLARKE: I think women have to be bolder in how willing we are into you.to step into the gap for each other, and I think we have to be will- CLARKE: Yes, she has. My daughter is 23, and she’s a graduate ofing to partner with each other more. We have to be careful not George Washington University. She’s fantastic, brilliant, kind, gen-to fall into the trap that a lot of men fall into by letting our egos erous, and she’s much bolder than I ever was at that age. But she’sget in the way of our ability to partner with each other, promote also very anxious, and I think young people now are very anxiouseach other, mentor each other, sponsor each other, and invest in and for good reason; the world is a frightening place.each other. There are a lot of women centric venture capitalistsnow, and I think those of us who have money and are able to be \"Life is an evolutionary process;angel investors–able to be significant partners in helping launchventures–need to be mindful of other women in that process. It’s we don't know everything atproven that when you support women businesses, you supportentire communities because it resonates in a way that is gender the starting line.\"specific–women have children, women are taking care of the el-derly, women are educators. When you support a woman in her IMAGE: A lot different than when we were growing up.enterprise, those ripples are going to impact the schools, nurs- CLARKE: Very different than when we grew up. Our spiritualitying homes, and restaurants in her community. Her life is going to was more formalized than theirs is, so their foundation is a littletouch so many pulse points just by virtue of all she’s juggling in shakier, and the pathways just aren’t as distinct. The pathwaysa day, so by supporting her, you ultimately support all of those to success for us–regardless of the industry or career we picked–entities. were pretty much mapped out; we didn’t have to figure out every step along the way. If a young person knows what field they wantIMAGE: What has been your experience interviewing influential to go into, it’s a little easier for them. But when they aren’t sure,women, and do you feel as though sometimes as women we don’t we don’t give them time and space to be unsure. Life is an evo-fully embrace our power? lutionary process; we don’t know everything at the starting line.CLARKE: Working for Black Enterprise, I meet women all the timewho blow me away with their confidence, ambition, their willing- IMAGE: And it’s okay to change your mind.ness to take risks and confront fear; they just blow me away with CLARKE: It’s okay to change your mind a million times as long astheir obvious power and their acceptance of it. But I think for peo- you’re purposeful when you change because you have to be goingple in general, self-doubt is a factor. It’s real, and it’s not a woman somewhere. My son has decided to be a visual arts major, andor a man thing. I think women are perhaps more willing to feel the he was worried about telling his father and me because we comedoubt and may be more susceptible to its potential power over us from such a business centric family, but I had no issue with it be-because our ambitions–still in 2017–are not always validated or cause I know it’s his passion; it’s something that’s been in himsupported by society. And certainly, that’s true for Black women, since he was a tiny child. At a certain point, he started hiding whatbut I think we have so many things working to counterbalance he wanted to do from us because he felt as a boy it wasn’t cool orthat. I believe most of us operate from a place of very solid faith– acceptable and that our family wasn’t going to accept his careerwe are deeply spiritual, and we’ve been nurtured in a way that path. I told him that as long as he can self-support, be happy, andhas supported and encouraged that. In my experience, the wom- what he’s doing is legal, I’m for it. I’m good. I want our childrenen in my life have been my absolute greatest support. to have dreams; I don’t think they’re taught to dream enough. Technology–with all of its creativity and innovation–has sappedIMAGE: Who was a woman that supported and mentored you a lot of their imagination time away, and now they’re hooked onalong the way? things that are prescribed as opposed to just letting their mindCLARKE: I think anyone who had a great mom is always going go wherever it goes and having the quiet space to do that. I thinkto start with their mom. My mother was a school teacher, and they need to dream and pursue their dreams.she was the first in her family to go to college. She got marriedlate for her time–she was 26. When she graduated from college, IMAGE: You’re also an author.her father was so proud; none of his children had gone to col- CLARKE: Yes, I’ve written two books. One of them is old and outlege, and he hadn’t gone to college. He told her that he would22 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

whole person with grandchildren for her, filled her up in a space that had been emptied out. It felt great to be able to help her heal. She felt that God gave me back to her in a way. IMAGE: Did you ever find out why she gave you up for adoption? CLARKE: I was born in a time when single motherhood was scan- dalous and shameful, and she was forced to give me up. Her par- ents were worried about her father’s reputation and his career; if it was known that she had become pregnant out of wedlock, it would have completely derailed his career since he was an inter- national superstar. She was sent away to give birth, give me up for adoption, return home, and never talk about it. That’s what she did, and it traumatized her. Caroline Clarke and the IMAGE: What was your life like growing up? late Natalie Cole at Post CLARKE: Being adopted was the greatest thing that ever hap- Cards from Cookie book pened to me. I grew up in a great family, and I love them so much. signing. My mother couldn’t bear children, so the only way they could have a child was through adoption. When I was growing up, theof print. It’s called Take a Lesson. It’s about how 27 very successful house was always full of music. My father loved Nat King Cole,African Americans achieved success and what they faced along and I loved his music even though he wasn’t from my generation.the way. The late great lawyer, Johnny Cochran is in the book, As a lyricist he was so beautiful, and I loved those sweeping or-Spike Lee, Robin Roberts, Bryant Gumbel and others. It’s a broad chestra arrangements behind him. I loved Natalie Cole, too. Byarray of African American’s telling their stories. the time I found out who my birth family was, I had already met Natalie Cole since she was my friend’s sister. Even though I hadIMAGE: What about your most recent book? met a lot of the family, I had not met my birth mother.CLARKE: About 3 years ago, I wrote a memoir called Postcardsfrom Cookie. It’s a very personal story. I was adopted as an in- IMAGE: Why did you decide to write the book?fant and raised by the most wonderful family. I was very blessed, CLARKE: I wrote the book because adoption now is so differentand I felt I was where I was meant to be, so I didn’t ever plan to than it was in my era. The chance of reunion is far greater now;search for my birth family. I didn’t think it would be possible to reunions happen all the time. Parents find children, children findfind them even if I wanted to, but when my children were very parents, and the meetings often don’t go well. It’s a very compli-small, I went to the agency where I was adopted because I was cated thing; sometimes they start out well, and then everythingconcerned about what I could be passing on genetically. You get falls apart. Other times, they don’t even get started. I wanted toworried when you’re adopted; you don’t know what’s in your ge- write about my story because the reunion was so positive. Mynetic make-up or how many illnesses are genetically linked. I was parents who raised me could have felt threatened, jealous, hurt,in my mid-30’s and wanted to get medical information which I and angry, but they were so loving. I was an only child growingknew I was entitled to. The agency gave me a report with some up, but my birth mother had two sons, so now I have two brothers.medical information and a lot of social history. It didn’t include They could have been hurt and jealous, but they were very sup-names or places, but they sort of painted a picture of my birth portive and open to forging a relationship with me and my family.mother and what her family was like at the time I was born, and Everybody just rose to the occasion. It wasn’t an easy thing to do;I recognized the family. I knew them; it turned out that my birth it was complex. It had a lot of layers, but everybody tried, andmother’s youngest sister was a friend of mine from college. My dear we’re still trying because family is family, and it’s always crazy.friend ended up being my aunt. You’ve got to commit, and whatever comes up, you’ve just got to push through it.IMAGE: Did she have any prior knowledge of this?CLARKE: She had some suspicions, but she never said anything IMAGE: What's your life’s motto? Postcards from Cookie canto me because she knew that I wasn’t interested in finding my CLARKE: To thine own self be true. be purchased at Amazon.com.birth family. The book is a story of how all that transpired and the It's on a sign above the door in mycoming together of my family that raised me and my biological office. From the moment we take ourfamily. I share details of forging a relationship with my birth moth- first breath almost, there is pressureer whose nickname was Cookie, so that’s why the title of the book to conform to this, that, and the oth-is Postcards from Cookie. The kicker in the story is that my birth er. You have to be careful that yourmother was Nat King Cole’s oldest daughter. choices are consistent with your val- ues–not just who you are in the mo-IMAGE: What was it like meeting your birth mother? ment, but who you want to be, whatCLARKE: Our first meeting was on the phone. I lived in New York, you want to become, the impact youand she lived in LA. We talked for hours; that first conversation want to make, and the lives you wantjust went on and on and on. It was just amazing. She was won- to change. Am I who I want to be? Amderful. Our meeting changed both of our lives. I think she felt vin- I being consistent with my values? Yourdicated because she had been so shamed by what she had done. humanity starts with who you are.To have me come back and have had a great life and be a happy FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 23

EVENT COVERAGE BLACK ENTERPRISEENTREPRENEURS SUMMIT 2017BLACK ENTERPRISE HELD THIS YEAR’SENTREPRENEURS SUMMIT AT THE MARRIOTTMARQUIS IN HOUSTON, TEXAS. WE CAUGHTUP WITH COURTNEY JOHNSON ROSE, CHAIROF THE GREATER HOUSTON BLACK CHAMBEROF COMMERCE BOARD, TO ASK HERTHOUGHTS ABOUT WHY HOUSTON WAS THEOPTIMAL CITY TO HOST THIS PREMIER EVENT.IMAGE: What was significant about the Black Enterprise JOHNSON-ROSE: I think they had a great experience inEntrepreneurs Summit being held in Houston this year? Houston. Organizations like the Greater Houston BlackJOHNSON-ROSE: One factor that made it significant was Chamber (GHBC) welcomed them. Our community embracedthat Earl Graves, Sr., founder of Black Enterprise Magazine, them, and there were a lot of first time attendees that maynamed Houston the Black Business Mecca. Houston has now travel to future conferences.such a thriving Black business community. It was a greatsetting for the Entrepreneurs Summit.  IMAGE: How does becoming a member of the GHBC benefit Black business owners?IMAGE: What makes Houston a city for entrepreneurial JOHNSON-ROSE: There are several benefits to joining.success?  Our network of professionals will expose their business toJOHNSON-ROSE: Our culture in Houston is supportive of our network of procurement managers from corporationsbusinesses and creativity. It’s the perfect place for entrepre- and governmental entities. We are the go to organization inneurs to connect and build relationships. Houston to find qualified Black owned firms. Our chamber strives to provide access, awareness, and to advocate onIMAGE: In what ways do you believe the entrepreneurs behalf of Black businesses.who attended the summit benefited from the sessionsthat were held? IMAGE: Houston is such a large metropolis. Are thereJOHNSON-ROSE: The sessions were informative and in- any plans to expand GHBC to surrounding areas?spirational. We were able to learn valuable tools and about JOHNSON-ROSE: Yes.The Chamber recently began pro-resources we can use in our businesses. We also enjoyed viding services in the Missouri City area, and we launchedthe Buy Black Pavilion with several Black owned businesses the Missouri City Branch of the GHBC. We will continue toshowcasing their goods and services. branch out around the city.IMAGE: How did you personally benefit from attendingthe summit?JOHNSON-ROSE: I enjoyed networking the most–connectingwith professionals from across the country was fun, informa-tive, and hopefully will be fruitful.IMAGE: What do you think being in Houston for thesummit was like for entrepreneurs who reside in other For more information about the Greater Houston Black Chamber of Commerce, visit ghbcc.com or call 713.660.8299.parts of the country?24 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

Award-winning multimedia journalist and Digital Editor at Black EnterpriseMagazine, Selena Hill, talks with IMAGE at the BE Entrepreneurs Summit. \"If you look at the prominent digital platforms like Facebook andSnapchat, they were created by millennials. I think millennials are inventing andcultivating this wave;wepuasrheindgrivtrinegndits.a\"ndIMAGE: What is your educational background? cherish Black Enterprise, and we want to translate that sameHILL: I graduated with a BA in Media Communications from feeling into the millennial space and let millennials know thatSUNY (State University of New York) Westbury which is one we offer great advice and tips when it comes to building aof the state universities of New York. business and building your personal brand and just getting relevant exposure. What Black Enterprise is trying to do isIMAGE: What are your responsibilities as Digital Editor? let millennials know that we are here for them the same wayHILL: At Black Enterprise, I do a lot of writing. I contribute that we were for their parents.stories to the website; I also edit stories. I help with the con-tributor network and do correspondent work. I also cover IMAGE: What do millennials have to their advantage thatdifferent events outside of work and use that as material to generations before them did not?create stories or help with social media and things like that. HILL: Technology. Technology is so fascinating, and it’s some- thing I grew up on. My grandmother used to really valueIMAGE: Most millennials get their information from so- writing things down. I personally don’t carry around a pencial media. How are you engaging this technology- driven and paper all the time, but I always have my phone becausegeneration? smart phones can do so much; you can watch your favoriteHILL: As we know, digital is definitely the wave of the indus- sitcom on your smartphone, you can write an essay on yourtry. A lot of traditional outlets–whether it be broadcast, tele- smartphone–it encompasses so much, and it’s so practical.vision, or newspapers–are moving into that digital space, so Everything I need is on that phone, and that’s the way of theI’m trying to help cultivate our brand in that way and expose future. It’s a wave that’s here, and if you are not riding thatit to more millennials by putting a lot of content on digital and wave, you are going to be swept behind.making sure that the content on our website is strategic–itfits with the brand, and it’s also targeting a certain audience. IMAGE: In what ways are millennials influencing digital platforms?IMAGE: Is Black Enterprise targeting millennials? HILL: If you look at the prominent digital platforms like Face-HILL: Yes, we are definitely targeting millennials. Black En- book and Snapchat, they were created by millennials. I thinkterprise is such a legacy brand. When it was first founded, it millennials are inventing and cultivating this wave; we are drivingwas a pioneer in what it did for Black businesses. My parents (continued on page 36) FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 25

PASTOR KIRBYJON CALDWELL A Man Who Knows What It Takes To Win PHOTOGRAPHY BY STEVE JONES26 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

EVENT COVERAGE2WINWHAT IT TAKES\"Black Enterprise was more than a magazine; it wasan expression that said to a young guy like me from Fifth Ward that Black folk can do something big and bad and bold.\" By TERRY BAUGH BESSARDWhen Pastor Kirbyjon Cald- lage Church Family and successful social ministries into independently operated well took the stage at the entrepreneur knows something about. nonprofits, Caldwell and the Windsor Vil- Black Enterprise Entre- Ever since Caldwell, a Wharton MBA gradu- lage Church Family set out on a community preneurs Summit held in ate, left what was on track to be a lucrative development journey undergirded by prayer. Houston, Texas, his first career as a Wall Street broker to eventual- The result has been a radical change inwords were a testimony to the impact both ly serve as senior pastor to a 25-member the economic and social landscape of thethe founder, Earl G. Graves Sr., and the flock in 1982, his reach has greatly exceed- historically underserved area in which themagazine had made in his life. “For me,” ed the conventions of United Method- church resides. Two history-making proj-he told four Black Enterprise leaders he as- ism and the traditions of church ministry. ects have brought spiritual, economic,sembled on stage, including the two sons “When I arrived at the church and looked educational and social vitality, and em-of Earl Graves, “Black Enterprise was more through the front door, I saw a pulpit, a powerment to Central Southwest Hous-than a magazine; it was an expression that microphone and an organ,” Caldwell said. ton. The Power Center and Pointe 2.3.4.,said to a young guy like me from Fifth Ward “As far as I was concerned, that was all we collectively provide 530.6 full-time equiv-(Houston, Texas) that Black folk can do needed.” The church also needed direction, alent jobs and make an annual $65.5 mil-something big and bad and bold. For me, which he defined in a three-point mission: lion cash flow impact on the communi-as a young student at a liberal arts college the church would have a strong education ty.in “nowhere” Minnesota, it was telling the ministry beyond Sundays, a winsome wor-school to go get Black Enterprise and put ship service, and outreach to children and A former abandoned and dilapidat-it in their library. For me, Black Enterprise youth. ed Kmart facility, The Power Center is awas and still is an iconic expression of the 21st-century service delivery model of pri-best that not just Black America, but Amer- A social entrepreneur by self-description vate and public partnership. This multi-useica has to offer.” and action, Caldwell has spent the last facility, which sits on 24 acres of land, serves three decades leading the expansion of 11,000 families a month and adds $15.5 Caldwell went on to deliver a powerful that mission into a grand realized vision million a year to the economy. Housed on-and inspirational speech entitled “What that addresses the needs of people of all site with The Power Center are a variety ofit Takes to Win.” It is a subject this senior ages inside and outside the church. After for-profit and non-profit entities includingpastor of the 17,000-member Windsor Vil- transforming several of the church’s many executive office suites, a private Christian FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 27

school, J. P. Morgan Chase, entrepreneur- ference title as a key point. He encouraged Pastor Kirbyjon Caldwell (right)ial suites and the Jesse H. Jones Confer- the audience to be all that they can be as with son, Turner Caldwell, at theence Center, which generated $680,000 in entrepreneurs in four ways. An overviewevent sales last year. of his remarks are as follows: Black Enterprise Entrepreneurs Summit Pointe 2.3.4. is a 234-acre mini-master- Black. In the middle of the Black powerplanned community that created 2,000 movement and two years after two Black trepreneurs. Consider building a bridge be-construction jobs and produces $1.7 medalists raised their fists at the 1968 tween your entrepreneurial endeavor andmillion in new property taxes each year. Summer Olympics, Earl Graves had the your spirituality. God placed that desire inUpon completion, the community has an nerve and courage to name his magazine you, and He wants you to succeed basedestimated construction value of $173 mil- Black Enterprise. It was a cutting-edge and on biblical values.lion. Pointe 2.3.4. encompasses a com- revolutionary act. He named the magazinemercial park that generates $1.7 million in something that would stand the test of Summit. This word can either mean apexcommercial sales on an annual basis and time, and it has. In this age of corporate or top of your game, or it can infer a gath-is made up of national and local business- complexities and toxicities, there are three ering or meeting place where folk dialogue.es such as CVS Pharmacy and Walgreen’s. things you must focus on to be properly The second meaning can sometimes getA residential subdivision called Corinthi- calibrated so that you stay grounded and us in trouble. You can meet and dialoguean Pointe provides 462 quality affordably endure any storm: with the wrong people. Without a vision,priced homes, many of which belong to people perish. The wrong people can makefirst-time home buyers. Residents in the 1. Your spirituality – Have the utmost con- you, and the vision perish. The folk yousubdivision spend a combined $16.5 mil- fidence in God. choose to be around your life says morelion annually. A YMCA, HISD elementary 2. Your emotionality – Be centered in yourself. about you than what you verbally commu-and senior high charter schools, Texas 3. Your ethnicity – Be comfortable in your nicate about yourself. God can bless you soChildren’s Pediatrics Center, an indepen- own skin. The very first people created on that your enemies become your elevator,dent senior living facility, and the Kingdom this planet were Black. Celebrate and ac- but there’s no need to choose them. \"Sur-Builders’ Center (The KBC) complete the cent your Blackness. round yourself with the right people incurrent phase of Pointe 2.3.4. The KBC, a your professional and personal lives. Suc-183,000-square-foot community center, Enterprise. Genesis 2:15 tells us the Lord ceed in spite of some of the folk you havehouses the Windsor Village Church Family placed Adam in the Garden of Eden to tend had in your life.”temporary sanctuary and administrative and keep it; it was the first example of en-offices, credit union, early childhood de- terprise. Till the ground (your project or As Caldwell ended his speech, he offeredvelopment program and an entrepreneurs’ endeavor) and watch it, add value, mon- this blessing: “May your reach always ex-learning center. Plans for phase two of etize that asset, take capital and convert ceed your grasp.”Pointe 2.3.4. incorporate a prayer center it into cash flow, and make a difference.and a permanent sanctuary. Let somebody know you have been here. For more information about Pastor Kirby- After you add value, you must guard it. Ex- jon Caldwell, visit: Kingdombuilders.com. It is clear that Caldwell knows how to win, pect some haters. While some of you may Follow Pastor Caldwell on Facebook andand he is happy to share it with others. He or may not work for a great enterprise and Twitter@PastorKirbyjonauthored the book The Gospel of Good perhaps your business has yet to becomeSuccess: A Road Map to Spiritual, Emo- great, you are a great enterprise. When \"The wrong people cantional and Financial Wholeness and co-au- you look back over your life and see what make you and thethored Entrepreneurial Faith: Launching you have come through, you have to say, vision perish.\"Bold Initiatives to Expand God’s Kingdom “Yes, I am an enterprise!” Applaud and ap-with Walt Kallestad. He served as spiritual preciate yourself. Say, “Enterprise, todayadvisor to Presidents George W. Bush and we are going to make it happen, and if no-Barack Obama. His leadership has attract- body else thinks you can, I think you can!”ed an abundance of media interest, honorsand awards. He recently received the U.S. Entrepreneurs. What you say about your-Small Business Administration’s Minority self has more influence on you than whatSmall Business Champion Award in May you hear others say about you. My dadduring National Small Business Week. He sold clothes. To me, he was a model entre-is most proud of being husband to Suzette preneur. People broke into his shop withCaldwell, an associate pastor and presi- great regularity; his store was broken intodent and chair of The Prayer Institute— so many times that his insurance was can-founded by Caldwell in 1995, and father to celed. At no point did I ever hear my dadtheir three children. complain. He restocked the store and kept on going. Nobody could ever accuse him of WHAT IT TAKES TO WIN giving up. Don’t allow yourself to worry. God’s greatness is within you. All twelve To the Black Enterprise Enterpreneurs of the disciples that Jesus chose were en-Summit audience, Caldwell illustrated whatit takes to win using each word of the con-28 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

Mathew Knowles EVENT COVERAGEhas proven that he knows how to achieve success. In his book, TheDNA of Achievers, Knowles reveals the traits he believes are mostvaluable while in pursuit of your goals. This detailed work revealshow passion and determination can bring about desired results.While promoting The DNA of Achievers at the BE EntrepreneursSummit, Knowles spoke with IMAGE about the inspiration behindthe release of his informative best seller.IMAGE: Why did you decide to write The DNA of Achievers?KNOWLES: Well, as an educator–I’ve been at Texas Southern Uni-versity now for 10 years–one of my tasks is to write papers andbooks. I travel extensively. Whenever I am sitting in first class nextto someone who owns a company or has a high level position witha corporation, I notice a pattern when I talk to them–they all pos-sess certain traits, and I see those same traits in myself and myfriends who are highly successful. I added a couple in the book,but that's what inspired me.IMAGE: What main trait do you feel led to your success?KNOWLES: The main trait is passion because when you live yourpassion, you never work a day in your life. And your passion co-exists with another trait which is work ethic. You don't usuallyfind someone who is highly passionate about something and theydon't have incredible work ethics. And vice versa, you can't findsomeone with incredible work ethics that's not highly passionate.IMAGE: What do you want people to know after reading the book?KNOWLES: I want them to have hope; whatever their dreams are,whatever their passion is, I want them to have hope in themselves.IMAGE: What did you instill in your daughters about entrepre-neurship?KNOWLES: If they had wanted to be doctors, I would have toldthem to go to med school, and I would have bought a hospital.That’s how I think.IMAGE: How can the book be purchased?KNOWLES: The book can be purchased at dnaofacheivers.com. I willsign it, and ship it. Taylore Gills and Mathew Knowles FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 29

SnapshotsEVENT COVERAGE 2017 BLACK ENTERPRISE ENTREPRENEURS SUMMIT MARRIOTT MARQUIS HOUSTON, TEXAS30 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

SUBSCRIBE POETRY TODAY! Rejoice Visit Us Online At: Rejoice woman and celebratewww.imagemagazineonline.com Celebrate the obstacles you’ve overcome.www.faithmagazineonline.com Rejoice woman and celebrate Celebrate the victories you’ve won. Rejoice in your womanhood Celebrate the Spirit that dwells within. Rejoice and celebrate The strength and patience you Embraced when it felt like the world was Against you and the storms would never end. Take a moment to reminisce, Reflect on where you’ve been. Remember the courage you had to Endure when you wanted to give in. Rejoice woman and celebrate In mind, body, spirit, and soul. Celebrate strength and wisdom, The truth you did unfold— That a strong woman Will still stand When she’s done all she can. She’ll stand on the promises of the Alpha, the Omega Man. Rejoice woman and celebrate Always demand respect. And if ever you begin to deny The Power, Take a moment to reflect. Rejoice Woman and Celebrate. Again, I say, Rejoice! DHJ FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 31

Derrick and Tomara Thompson Cabo San Lucas, Mexico June 17, 2017 CONGRATULATIONS, Derrick and Tomara Appropriately themed \"A Tribute to Forever\", the elegant destination wedding of Derrick Thompson and the former Tomara Johnson will be etched forever in the memories of all who attended the blissful ceremony. Facing the Pacific Ocean, the bride and groom exchanged vows and committed to a lifetime of love in the presence of guests and family members who traveled to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico to celebrate with the newlyweds. Derrick is a Sports Performance Trainer and the CEO of Xcelfitness-Houston. Tomara is a Senior Audit Manager with KPMG, LLP. The couple resides in Fresno, Texas.32 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

To have and to hold from this day forward FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 33

ENTREPRENEUR SPOTLIGHTGITEGALLERYTHE LLOYD GITE OWNER, THE GITE GALLERY HOUSTON, TEXAS good eye to be able to pick out quality things, so I brought back a lot of paintings. I brought back artifacts and fabrics for myself and for some of my friends as gifts; they liked them so much. I went again, and I brought more stuff back, and people wanted to buy the items from me; people were buying so much that it began to pay for my trips. So over the years when I was in television, maybe once or twice a year I’d go to different parts of Africa, bring back art and sell it. I would sell it out of my house when I was still in television. When I got ready to make that transition, I left my job on a Sunday and got on an airplane that day headed to Africa and never turned back. So that’s kind of how it started. IMAGE: How do you think African art touches the heart of people? GITE: Well, when we say African art, it’s a misnomer because when you say African art to Americans they think of masks, stat- ues, and fabrics. They don’t think of what I call fine art by Afri- can artists−original paintings by African artists. I’ve brought those original paintings by African artists to America to sell, so I’m in- troducing people to a different form of African art. The top sellers are the paintings. Those are so rich with color, and they really res- onate with people. I also do custom framing, and that adds even more value and more attractiveness to the pieces.IMAGE: Where are you originally from? IMAGE: You also sell Cuban art. Is that right?GITE: Actually, I’m a native Houstonian. I was gone for 15 years GITE: In the past year, I’ve gone to Cuba twice. We now have aand came back to Houston in 1983 for a job. line of Afro-Cuban and Cuban art.IMAGE: Where did you attend high school? IMAGE: What do you find special about African art?GITE: I finished from Jack Yates High School. I got an undergrad- GITE: Color. It’s just like African American art. African Americanuate degree from North Texas State University and a master’s artists are really big on color, and so are African artists. Psycho-degree from the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor in Radio/ logically, color has an effect on us. For me, it brings cheer into myTelevision/Film. space. I feel very comfortable being surrounded by art that looks like me and art that’s from where I’m originally from. I think it’sIMAGE: When did you decide to become an entrepreneur? important for people who are of African descent to see images ofGITE: Well, I didn’t really decide. I transitioned from my job; I got themselves or their ancestors in their homes. It just adds so muchfired which is not unusual for television people. I knew then that I more when you see beauty around you.was going to do what I’m doing now. Let’s back track. I have alwaysbeen fascinated with Africa, even as a child. My first trip to Africa IMAGE: What is your greatest satisfaction when someone pur-was in 1976, and I fell in love with the culture. God has given me a chases a piece of art? GITE: Transforming somebody’s house; that's the greatest satis- faction for me. We might have a client who buys twenty pieces.34 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

They’ll come in and say they need their house redone and that it host non-profit events; we don’t charge the non-profits to doneeds to be modernized and they need new art. To completely things here.redo a home to satisfy the client is satisfying to me. When I seethem happy with their piece or pieces, that’s all I need. IMAGE: What is one thing that you believe in wholeheartedly? GITE: I really believe in helping African American entrepreneurs.IMAGE: You’re very well-traveled. So many of us don’t understand the need to give back, and thatGITE: Oh, yes! I’ve gone through at least six passports if not more. bothers me a whole lot because we would never be anywhereI’ve made 30 plus trips to Africa; I've stopped counting. I’ve been without the help of other people. And so, I try to help people thepretty much everywhere I want to go with the exception of a cou- best way I can.ple of African countries which are not as stable; once those be-come stable, I might visit those. For more information about The Gite Gallery visit thegitegallery. com. You can also like The Gite Gallery on Facebook.IMAGE: Do you have a favorite place to get art from?GITE: Well, in Africa, because the art is so different from countryto country, the only place I do not buy art from is North Africa; ithas lots of European flavors, Islamic and Muslim flavors. I preferBlack African art from South Africa, West Africa, and East Africa.One of my favorite places is West Africa. They have incredible artin Ghana, Nigeria, Senegal, and Cameroon, but I also like art outof South Africa— Capetown and Johannesburg.IMAGE: What are your thoughts on replicas of African art andartifacts that are made in China?GITE: The Chinese are people who take a product and reproduceit, and that is happening worldwide. One of their main targets hasbeen Africa because there’s so much need for money. They havetaken African art and African fabrics to China, recreated those fab-rics at a much cheaper cost, and flooded the market with thoseitems. You can buy African cloth in Africa that was made in China.IMAGE: How can we be intentional about making sure that whatwe purchase was actually made in Africa?GITE: I don't think most African Americans care, and that’s theproblem because if they did care then they wouldn’t go to TJMaxx and Ross and Home Goods and buy African art that theyknow is made in China—to me that defeats the whole purpose.IMAGE: How have the aesthetics of African art influenced artis-tic expression globally?GITE: There are some very successful white artists who don’tdo anything but paint black images. Picasso took his style fromAfrica—that whole Cubism movement. If you look him up, youwill see that he admitted where his images came from. Picassohad African artifacts in his studio. He was very proud of what hedid. He wasn’t the only one whose style came from Africa, but wedon’t do our due diligence. Many prominent white artists haveused African art as inspiration for their works.IMAGE: Do you have a favorite artist?GITE: I have several artists whose work I love. I really love Rah-mon Olugunna's art who is from Nigeria; he's one of my favorites.Kofi Agorsor is also one of my favorites; he’s one of our top sellers.IMAGE: Events are held here as well, right?GITE: Yes, we do a lot of events here; the gallery is for lease.We’ve had weddings here and other social events. Every first Fri-day of the month we have a networking reception where we in-vite people who have never been to the gallery before; we havechampagne and light bites. People walk around and network. Ifthey want to buy art, they do; if they don’t, that’s fine. We also FALL 2017 • IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM 35

(continued from page 11) and how a child can be restored by pro- (continued from page 25)to deviations from God’s best. My viding support in the deficient area(s). it and pushing trends. We have capi-strength was renewed, and with the To address deficiencies, children often tal to spend, and people are paying at-encouragement of a couple of great readjust automatically to survive, and tention to that. I believe millennials arepastors, a church full of friends, and my sometimes, their readjustment ultimate- more entrepreneurial because we seemother leading the way, I completed a ly has a negative result. For example, the world differently.Masters in School Psychology in the children in search of belonging mightsummer of 2015. gravitate toward gangs. They might re- IMAGE: How so? What happened for me was not magic, sort to stealing if they feel provision is HILL: The generation before did notbut method. Even though many of my ex- low, or they might get involved in ques- have exposure to how other peopleperiences were as an adult, and Curtis tionable relationships if their self-value were living their lives. Because weendured a significant loss before the is low. To help increase relational need have social media, I see how myfirst grade, the effects were the same— deposits in children, parents can: friend that I graduated from elemen-negative. The lack of relational needs tary with is living their life in Austra-such as those listed below can have a 1.  Foster encouragement.  The over- lia. There are so many opportunitiesnegative impact on student performance. all purpose of encouragement is to that have been exposed to me, where- give every child a sense of self-respect as, the only thing my mother knew and• Security: Feeling physically and emo- and a sense of accomplishment–not to saw was her community. Women gottionally safe in a relationship. Feeling safe bring them down or give them a false married and had kids around 24 andin my environment. sense of privilege. Encouragement in- 25. Me, I see how everybody else is• Consistency: Having life in order, volves patience, active listening, and living. I see that Janet Jackson had aresponding with self-control and know- compassion in working with children baby at 49, and Halle Berry had a babying what to expect from the behavior of (Green, 2009).  at 49, too. So, I’m seeing that now mil-others. lennials, especially women, are putting• Belonging: Feeling part of a group 2. Stress improvement. Most important career and opportunity first and realiz-and knowing I am accepted even when in using encouragement techniques is ing that there is so much more that wemy behavior is less than perfect. distinguishing between the student and can see. That exposure has given me• Value: Someone taking an interest his or her behavior (or the doer and the options. Because I’ve seen that therein what I am doing. Someone appreci- deed). It is important for parents and are other ways–other opportunitiesates the person that I am. teachers to remember that improve- outside of my immediate communi-• Comfort: When hurting, having some- ment, not perfection, is the desired goal ty–I want that. I think a lot of millennialone express genuine care and concern of changing human behavior (Dreikurs women are waiting longer; I definitelyand acknowledging what I am feeling & Soltz, 1992). think that’s the trend among millennialwith words or appropriate touch. women–to wait until their 30’s to start• Recognition: Words of thanks and 3.   Avoid pampering and controlling.  a family.acknowledgement. Having someone re- It is very important in this process togard me highly for what I accomplish avoid humiliation and/or overprotec- IMAGE: How does the BE Entrepre-and being respected by others. Feeling tion. Because home influences cor- neurs Summit benefit millennials?honored in the relationship. relate with academic achievement, it is HILL: BE has been hosting this Sum-• Affection: Having someone show important for parents and/or guardians mit for 22 years. We are celebrating in-appropriate non-sexual physical touch, and school staff members to use these novation and the business elite, but wesomeone saying, “I love you”. Showing skills as well (VanVelsor, 2009). Both also empower small businesses withthey care about me. over and under controlling parents can the tools, knowledge, and resources• Encouragement: Someone acknowl- lead to lower academic performance. they need to take their business to theedging my attempts to reach new goals next level. Any entrepreneur can comeor to do the right thing. With the use of simple techniques as here to learn and gain something from• Support: Having someone gently help those mentioned above, parents and it. Millennials need to attend a BE En-me with a problem or struggle, giving teachers can improve the self-esteem trepreneurs Summit because we’re stillme appropriate assistance. of the children they have influence over learning and figuring things out, and and help them attain what was previ- there are so many people with decades I cannot speak for Curtis, but I was ously thought to be unattainable. of experience to connect and partnerstruggling in almost every area listed, with. The BE Entrepreneurs Summit isand it took a small army of people to Carol Clayborne is a Licensed Spe- a great resource.help right my ship again. And for these cialist in School Psychology in Hous-people, I am truly grateful. ton, Texas. She is a former elementary Follow Selena Hill on Instagram school teacher with 10 years of expe- and Twitter @MsSelenaHill As a school psychologist, I’ve seen rience.students struggle and succeed, andI've seen them struggle and fail. 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#PULLthatTRIGGER! \"The truth of the matter is that many individuals in committed relationships are not \"emotioornfaulllyfilslteidm.ulated bursts like, “I knew it the whole time...why am I so stupid?!!!” 3. Maladaptive Relational Patterns. These patterns are the result of the subconscious propensity to repeat the same re- lational patterns year after year due to a lack of psychologi- cal insight, self-criticism regarding past and present relation- ship failures, or the fear of perceived social judgement from others. It’s the same ol’, same ol’ but with different people.DR. CHANEL YOUNG-POPE 4. Utilizing the Negative Aspects of Convenience and Compla- cency. This is the refusal to release or terminate an unproductive re-How many people do you know−both male and fe- lationship due to an unrealistic perception of commitment based on male−who absolutely refuse to pull the trigger on longevity or an unconscious fear of abandonment. This factor can their dead-end relationship? I’m sure that in a mat- also include fear of the unknown (afraid that new relationships will ter of seconds you vividly identified at least one not blossom or last); ultimately, there is fear of being alone. It sounds person without intense thought.  The truth of the like this: “But I’ve invested so much time in this relationship.” matter is that many individuals in committed relationships are not emotionally stimulated or fulfilled. In most cases, partners 5. Avoiding the Termination Process. This is the use of avoid- complain of emotional distancing and alienation, physical or ance as a coping strategy to deflect or deter emotional pain. It psychological abuse, a lack of sexual gratification, and repeat- can also include the deeply rooted inability to access the inter- ed accounts of infidelity for many many years. Yet, they remain nal fortitude necessary to forge ahead and complete the ter- and endure the harsh psychological impact. With that being mination process−to pull the proverbial relationship trigger. said, there are five primary factors that can negatively influence your attempt to terminate unfulfilling or unhealthy relationships:  Why do both men and woman have so much difficulty pull- ing the relationship trigger? To this rhetorical question, I say, we 1. Ignoring Your Internal PA System (the intuitive voice). must first find the internal courage to pull the trigger of the emo- The PA system or Public Address system was historical- tional 9-millimeter and release the dead weight of unfulfillment. ly needed for an orator to be loud enough to address the pub- Secondly, we must then follow the emotional stench and identify lic. In this case, your emotional PA system is needed to the patterns or root causes that have resulted in psychological rig- intuitively lead you towards truth and authenticity. Unfortu- or mortis. Thirdly, we must transport this emotional corpse to the nately, in unfulfilling or maladaptive relationships, your PA morgue of relationships past and be willing to allow the process of system is muted significantly or has totally malfunctioned. grief and loss to heal us from the inside out. Lastly, we must bury and extinguish this life-sucking emotional parasite of unfulfillment 2. Failure to Honor Your Intuitive Voice. It is the incessant once and for all. Just know, the claims we file with our emotion- need to delay critical relationship decisions or termination of al insurance policies will yield both physical, psychological, and a partnership until you find tangible proof to confirm or vali- spiritual dividends that will annuitize our relational lives for years date “a hunch” despite having intuitively sensed the indiscretion to come. #PULLthatTRIGGER! prior to actually finding validation; it is a blatant refusal to trust your gut instinct. This process usually results in “knee-jerk” re- Chanel Young-Pope, Psy.D. is a former United States Army Behav- actions of self-blame and guilt and is typically followed by out- ioral Health Doctor who specialized in Clinical Psychology. She is also the Founder and CEO of Sapiente Wellness.38 IMAGEMAGAZINEONLINE.COM • FALL 2017

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