Shibumi Magazine - 20-21

“e great revelation perhaps never did come. Instead there were daily little miracles, illuminations, matches struck unexpectedly in the dark.” Virginia Woolf



Although another academic year comes to a close at Shibumi, this year feels like no other. e experiences of this last year, as reflected in the articles, have been different for each one of us. Poems appear like extended haikus and articles like extracts of conversations still continuing amidst us. ere are either descriptions - visceral and suspended lightly from the stores of our memories, or questions - hanging loosely but vitally from the pauses of our existence. A deeper glance at this year's contributions reveals an ubiquitous churn. In this uninvited struggle that we were thrown into, we often oscillated from hope to resignation and gratitude to guilt. Yet some of the writings embody an ironic sense of calm. A child describes her solitude with nature as though she were 'part of the mountains' while another notes how the silence on the streets 'had a physical form' although they were 'filled with emptiness'; some articles are sprinkled with words that invite a sense of pause, 'experience-of-the-moment', 'still', 'motionless' and a feeling of 'unnatural quiet'; whereas others explore the ever-present sense of surrounding which is 'unmistakably clear, undeniably present', in what we discover was anomalous time. e articles that follow provide little windows to our numerous different realities of the past year. While some attempt to typify the struggle and the confusion that ensued, by drawing from their experiences of loneliness, rigidity, complacency, loss and misgiving; other stories simply pause to reflect on the unseen realities of everyday life that this year brought alive. Despite these differences, a common continuing thread along the pages of this anthology searches for a sense of familiarity and belonging in a time that was marred by a feeling of separateness and isolation.



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My Experience During e Covid -19 Pandemic Gwayhunle Tep My name is Gwayhunle Tep. Most people in and out of Shibumi, call me Ale. I am sharing with you my experience, dealing with this drastic change the world is facing due to the Covid-19 pandemic. We all know the effect the pandemic has had on the world, how the economy went down and how people's function in society changed. Gatherings were not allowed and public places were shut. Without a doubt the pandemic has caused difficulties for everyone, affecting their lifestyles; schools were closed, work from home became common, people lost jobs and some could not even go home to their loved ones. When the lockdown was announced I was at Shibumi. I had booked my plane ticket but the flight was cancelled. It was only after seven months, in October, when I went home. Since Nagaland is far far far away and there is no direct flight, I first went to Kolkata, then from there to Dimapur and finally took a bus to my village Tseminyu Old Town. It's a very small town with only 200 households. Much much smaller than the apartments most of you come from. So, when I reached Dimapur, I quarantined for seven days. I also got a test done and only after that I went home to my mama and papa. When I reached my village, everything looked normal. I did not feel like the world was undergoing some change. I went on picnics and fishing trips with friends, worked on the field with mama, spent Christmas and new year with family, and ate yummy food at home. I also attended my cousin-sister's wedding. Not a lot of people attended it but it was still fun. In all, I spent about two and a half comfortable months at home. Of late I have been feeling like I want to go to a beach. Coming from the mountains, it's a sight I have been waiting to experience. But but but, Covid is still here and I can't travel freely. Never mind! I can close my eyes and go to the farthest beach, breaking the COVID rules, and have FUN! - 18 -

~ Lia - 19 -

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2020, A Doggone Year Kafeel 'What a year! Phew. at was the most unusual a while, with an empty campus and no one to play thing I have ever come across.’ with.’ 'Yeah, I almost died too when I fell down from up 'I had fun. I went out. I got to swim, I would play there. It was terrible. 2020 was a bit awkward but in that muck by the neighbour's farm. You should it wasn't totally its fault, you see.’ have come too. It was lots of fun.’ 'I know, but then to be able to experience such a 'What would I do there? You would run around thing is beyond my capacity. It was scary.’ with your dame. No one would even look at me. I have grown old.’ 'Oh come on now. It wasn't that bad. ere were some good things as well. Remember the time it 'One thing about last year that scared me were the was new, when 2020 just came? at was so good.’ animals from the forest. I was pretty sure that the big cat was always here. I could sense him!’ 'I can't deny that. We had been waiting for so long for everyone to come and 2020 made it happen. 'I shouted at everything that moved. I didn't Got to give credit for that. I mean, they did start bother to see what it was. I didn't want any before it was here but 2020 gave it that energy, surprises. I just went at it with all my energy. I that.. something. You know what I mean.’ didn't want to be a sitting duck; and this person who was supposed to protect us; he would not 'I know, I know. It is sad though. ings shouldn't wake up!’ have been left like that. I feel sad thinking about it. 2020 should have made it right.’ 'Hey, don't talk about him as though he is the enemy. He is good to us. He likes you too, you Both of them did not speak for a while. It felt like they know.’ were offering their silent condolences. 'Yeah, but he doesn't face the risk that we do. e 'Remember when it all stopped suddenly and the leopard wouldn't take him. It would be us that the school shut down? What did you think was big guy would be looking for. at's all I mean. I happening?’ like him too. But I get wary of him when he sneaks up behind me with that darned bottle with the 'I don't know. It was confusing. Everyone just yellow liquid in it. I just hate it. I have shouted at went away. I couldn't understand why. Even our him once or twice when he jumped me from dear man in the hat stopped coming, and our behind. It was that time when I had the nasty gourmet lunch stopped. But then we were lucky wound on my back.’ someone was here. Imagine nobody being here, and we were alone. at would have been crazy.’ 'He is just trying to help us. Not his fault. Do you remember that time when we woke him up in the 'Come to think of it, it was not that bad after all; middle of the night?’ especially for us here. Although it was boring after - 24 -

'Wow! How can I forget that? What a fool, he ‘It was good for him that he turned around and didn't have a proper torch with him! at was so went back inside the gate. I saw you there in the stupid. Who lives in a place like this without a path and I ran toward you.’ torch?’ 'en he finally saw them. ey were huge! At 'Oh, I was so excited. I had never seen them up least one of them was. I think it was a mother with close before.’ her young ones; I saw the trunk on the boys. ey were probably lost or they came for their midnight 'You know, that night I had been shouting for such snack. e neighbour had a lot of bananas back a long time but nobody bothered to check. Even then.’ you were simply standing there.’ 'Some of these humans are dumb. at neighbour 'I didn't realise what was happening. I mean I was there was throwing those bombs like a madman! confused. I had a cold you see and I couldn't smell No direction, no warning. I was almost deaf by the anything.’ end of it.’ 'At least he could have checked. I shouted at the 'Yeah, they are mostly afraid of us, I think. I gave it top of my lungs. He should have guessed it wasn't back to him when he crossed the line one time. I a mongoose or a rabbit that I was shouting at!’ pounced on that good-for-nothing fella; how dare he throw that sickle at me! I had my eye on him for 'He sleeps like a boar. It takes a while for him to a long time. I was...’ realise what is happening. But, oh boy, once he came out, he went berserk. He ran straight at it!’ GUNDA! AMMACHI! KARIYA! CARACLE! COME, COME!! 'He is a guy who has lived in the city all his life. What would he know about wild animals? He 'ere! lets go! I think it's lunch. What do you must have thought he could pet it. hah!’ think we have today?’ ‘I don't know. Let's find out.' 'He first ran into the hostel, and went up to the 'I am going to beat you to it!' first floor. I saw him on that terrace. He was 'In your dreams! Wuff!Wuff!’ shining the weak torch light at that chikoo tree there; it was so funny.’ 'He felt they were inside the campus. at's what he thought. I tried to show him where they were, but these guys never understand what we say.’ ‘And then, after he came down, he was going to go out of the gate. In my head, I was like: buddy, what are you doing? You shouldn't be going out. You will run right into them. But I couldn't control my excitement either. I was right behind him.’ 'Yeah, that was stupid. You should have come through the fence like I did. I knew exactly where they were.’ - 25 -

ಾನು ಎ ಾರನು ಾ ೆ. ಮಕ ಳನು , ಎ ಾರನು ತುಂ ಾ ಾ ೊಂ ೆ. ೊಸ ಸೂ ಬಂ ದು ಕು ನು ಇ ೆ. ಸಡ ಎ ಾ ೋ ಆ ತು, ಾರ ೊ ೆ ಾ ಾಡ ೆ ಆಗ ಲ. ಾ ೌ ಆ ತು. ಮಕ ಳನು ತುಂ ಾ ೆ ೆ ೊಳ ೆ. ಅಮ , ದು , , ಎ ಾರನು ೋಡ ೆ ಆ ೆ ಆಗು ತು. ಗ ೇ , ರೂಪ ಎ ಾ ೋದರು. ೊ ದ ೆ ಾವ ಏ ಾದರು ಾ ೊಡು ೆವ . ೊಂ . ಅ ಾಗ ಅ ಾಗ ೆನಪ ಆಗ ನಮ ೆ ಕು ಆಗುವ ದು, ಸಂ ೊಷ ಆಗುವ ದು. ರೂಪ ಆಂ ನ ತುಂಬ ಾ ಬರ ೆ ನನ ೆ, ಆಗ ಅ ಸು ೆ ಅವರು ಾಪ ಬರ ಾ ೆ ಅಂತ, ೋ ೋಣ. ನನ ೆ ಾ ೌ ನ ಹು ಾರು ತ ತು. ನನ ನು ಎಲರೂ ಾ ೊಂಡರು, ತುಂ ಾ ಾ ಂ . ತನು, ಶರ , ಂದ, ೕಲ ೕ ಎ ಾ ಗು ತುಂ ಾ ಾ ಂ . ಎ ಾರು ೆ ಾ ೋ ೊಂಡರು. ನನ ಮಗಳ ಮದು ೆ ಆ ತು, ಸ ಾನ ೆ ಒಂದು ವಷ ಆ ತು ಮದು ೆ ಾ . ೋ ೋನ ೈ ನ ಒಂದು ನನು ಕು ಗ ಲ. ಾ ಾಗ ಸೂ ಲು ಷುರು ಆಗ ೆ, ಾ ಾಗ ಎ ಾ ಸ ೋಗು ೆ ಅಂತ ಾ ತ ಇ ೆ. ಆದ ೆ ಎ ಾ ದೂರ ದೂರ ಆದರು. ಎ ಾರನು ಾ ೆ. ಮ ೆ ಏನು ಾ ಲ, ಊ ೆ ೋಗ ೆ ಆಗ ಲ, ಬ ನಲೂ ಓ ಾಡ ೆ ಆ ಲ. ಒಂದು ವಷ ೇ ಾರು. ಮುಂ ೆ ಒ ೆದು ಆಗ . ಊರ ಮದು ೆ ಆ ತು, ಾನು ಅಂದು ೊಂಡಂ ೆ ಆಗ ಲ. ಸೂ ನವರನು ಾಡು ೊಂಡ . ಮದು ೆ ೆ ೊಪ ಆಂ ಬರು ಾ ೆ ಅಂತ ಆ ೆ ಇತು. ನನ ೆ ಹು ಾರು ತ ತು, ರಕ ದ ೕ ೋ ೪ ಆ ತು, ಲ ೕ ಅಕ ನನ ೆ ಸ ಾಯ ಾ ದರು. ತುಂಬ ಸ ಾಯ ಾ ದರು. ಎಲ ೆ ತುಂಬ ತುಂಬ ಾ ಂ . - ೇ ಾ ಅಕ (In conversation with Hema Akka) ೊ ೌ ಚ ಾ ೆ ಇತು. ಏನು ಇ ಾ, ತುಂ ಾ ಚ ಾ ತು. ೊ ೌನ ಸ ಲ ಕಷ ಇತು. ನನ ೆ ಉ ಾರು ತ ತು. ಮಕ ೆ ಕಷ , ಎ ಾ ೆ ಕಷ , ೋಡಲು ಾಧ ಾಗ ಲ. ಮ ೆಯ ೆ. ೆನು ೋವ ಇತು. ತುಂ ಾ ೆಲಸ ಾಡ ೆ ಆಗ ಾ ಇರ ಲ. ಎ ಾರು ೆ ಾ ರ . - ಪ ಟ ಕ (In conversation with Puttakka) - 26 -

ೋ ೋನ ೈ ನ ೊರಗ ೆ ೋಗ ೆ ಡ ಾ ಇರ ಲ. ಾ ಾನು ಎ ಾ ತರ ೆ ಾಸು ಾಕು ಆಗತ ಇರ ಲ. ೋ ೋನ ೈ ನ ಮಗಳ ಮ ೆ ೆ ೋ ೆ, ಆ ಕ ೆ ಂದ ಈ ಕ ೆ ೆ ಡ ಾ ಇರ ಲ. ಮಗಳ ಮ ೆ ೆಂ ೆೇ ಪಕ ೊಂಗಟ ಅಂತ. ಾ ೌ ನ ಕ ಮಗಳ ಸು ೕಲ ಮ ೆ ೆ ೋ ೆ. ೆ ವ ೈ ನ ಾಜ ಾ ೇಶ ಆಸ ೆ ೆ ೋ ೆ ವ ಆ ತು. ಾ ೆ ತುಂಬ ಾ ಬ ಆ ತು. ಾಕ ಾಮ ೆ ವ ಆಗಲ, ಆಪ ೆಶ ಾಡ ೇಕು ಅಂತ ೇ ದರು. ಆಪ ೆಶ ೆ ಾ ೆ ತುಂಬ ಾ ಬ ಆ ತು. ಆಗ ಜು ಅಮ ಮತು ಾ ಅಣ ಸ ಾಯ ಾ ದರು. ೋ ೋನ ೈ ನ ತುಂಬ ಾ ಾ ಾ ದರು. ಎ ಾ ಡಬ ಡಬ ಾಸು ಾ ಾ ದರು. ಾಲ ಾಲ ಾ ಖಚು ಾ ೆ. ನನ ೆ ಾ ೌ ನ ತುಂಬ ಾ ಬ ಆ ತು. ಆ ಮಗಳ ಮ ೆ ೆ, ಈ ಮಗಳ ಮ ೆ ೆ ೋಗ ೆ ಾಸು ಇರ ಲ, ೋಗ ೆ ಆ ಲ. ಅಕ ಮ ೆ ೆ ೋಗ ೆ ಆಗ ಲ... ಈ ತರಹ ಾ ಬ ಆ ೋ ತು. ಮ ೆಯ ೇ ಇದು ಇದು ತುಂಬ ೊ ಆ ತು. ನಮ ೆ ಸೂ ಇ ದ ೆ ೆ ಾ ಇರ ತು. ಾನು ಅದನ ಾ ಾ ಇ ೆನು. ಎಕ ಾ ಾಇ ನ ಮ ೆ ೕ ಾ ೋದು, ಬ ೆ ೊ ಯದು, ಒಂದು ನ ಬ ಬ ೆ ೊ ಯದು. ಾನು ತುಂಬ ೇ ೆಲಸ ಾ ೊದು, ಅದರ ೇ ೈ ಸ ೋಗ ತು. ಆ ೆ ಸು ೕಲದು ಾಪ ದು ೆಲಸ ೆ ಆ ೋಗ ತು. ನ ಾಪ ದು ಬ ೆ , ಾ ನ, ಊಟ, ಅ ೆ ಆ ೋ ತು ರ ಾ ೈ ಅ . ಹಬ ೆ ಾ ಂದು ಾ ಬ . ಅದ ೆ ಏನು ಹಬ ಾ ಲ. ಮ ೆ ಂಪ ಆ ಾ ೆ, ಸ ಲ ಾ ೆ. ಸು ೕಲದು ಮದು ೆ ಆ ಎರಡು ವಷ ಆ ತು. ಮದು ೆ ೆ ಮೂರು- ಾಲು ಲ ಾಲ ಾ ೆ. ಆಗ ಮದು ೆ ಆ ತು. ಮದು ೆ ಆ ಒಂದು ವಷ ೆ ಾಪ ಆ ತು. ಒಂದು ಆದ ೆ, ಒಂದು ಾ ಬ . ಒಂದು ಮಗಳ ಆದ ೆ ಇ ೊ ಂದು ಮಗಳದು ಾ ಬ . ೕವನ ಎಲ ಾ ಬ . ಒಂದು ಆದ ೆ ಇ ೊ ಂದು, ಈತರ ಆಗ ೆ. ಸುಖ ಇರವವ ೆ ಸುಖ ಗ ೆ. ಕಷ ಇರವವ ೆ ಕಷ ೆ ಬರುತ ೆ - ಏನು ಾ ೊಣ. ಅಮ ಅಪ ಮ ೆ ನನ ೆ ಕಷ ಸುಖ ೊ ರ ಲ. ಮದು ೆ ಆ ಬ ಕಷ ಕಷ - ಕುಡುದು, ೊ ೆದು, ಬಡುದು, ಜಗಳ ಾ , ಇ ೕವನ ಇದರ ೇ ೋ ತು. ಈಗ ನನ ಮಕ ಗು ಅ ೆ ತರಹ ಕಷ . ೇ ಈ ತರಹ ಇ ೆ ನನ ಾ ಬ . ಇನು ಮುಂ ೆ ಏನು ಆಗ ೆ ೋ ೋಣ, ೇವರು ಏನು ೊಡು ಾ ೋ, ೋ ೋಣ. ನಮ ೈಯ ಏನು ಇಲ, ೇವರು ಇರು ಾ ೆ ಅಲ ಾ. - ಾಗಮ (In conversation with Nagamma) - 27 -

e Ballad of the Great King Siddharth Rakesh An injured wing, a fallen king. is is a pigeon I rescued, Whom more than silver I valued. e grey crown of a king he had, It covered his head so bold. People must have thought I was mad, When I held him like a precious lump of gold. One night a wooden crate was his bed, Right next to mine on which read. But when I slept, Onto mine he lept. Due to this he earned a spot in our balcony, Where we played till the neighbor heard a cacophony. By now to him I was attached, Our friendship unmatched. But even though it was fun, My times with the king were done. e rescue service came, And sadness poured over me like rain. is was a good time, But good times end with the sourness of a time, is is all just how it goes, We just need to swim to where the river flows. We can take our own detours, But eventually this road we have to endure. We may be stopped by some seaweed on which other fish thrive, Or we just flow with the river- the river of life. - 28 -

Just After... Saanj Just after we thought all of us were home in isolation, e once unnoticed citizens had formed their own crowds. Just after we thought all of us were caged in our homes, A murder of crows displayed their freedom. Just after we woke up that day and thought we saw our streets filled with emptiness ose same unnoticed citizens had filled it with their occupation. -26th March 2020, 3 days into the lockdown. - 29 -

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Moments Suhaan I watched as the monumental industries came to an unforeseen halt. e future, being fragmented to bits like broken glass. All this done by a simple virus. A virus which could not be seen by the naked human eye, but the world as a whole could feel the burden of it. e planet went quiet, It felt as though silence had a physical form and was roaming the streets, and if anyone got out of their house, the 'silence' would ingest them. It was a very horrifying time during lockdown, and my imagination would take me to all kinds of places. at's something I will miss, and will struggle to find that time for myself, like how I found in lockdown. Pursue Ashish Whirring, rumbling, beeping, clunking e energy of the city goes on chugging! e tiny particle, eager to hitch onto life Cuts the mechanical cacophony like a knife! Chirping, humming, purring, rustling e ensemble of nature spreading and revealing! All one, yet separate, impatient in the wait, To pursue the evolutionary bait! - 32 -

Home Sweet Home Rukmini I don't even remember how it started. All I know is that suddenly the word 'coronavirus' was all over the newspapers; so many deaths, so many cases rising per day. I never gave it much thought; it was just 'that Chinese virus thingy'. en India had it and the lockdown was announced. ere was something strangely thrilling about having the world reduced to a few square feet of space, having to make do with whatever was in the house for entertainment. ere are no solid, well-defined boundaries in normal life, nothing that says 'stop here', so it felt like a challenge to see how well you managed your sanity without stepping out of your house all day. I was luckier than many people in that I had other people besides my family members to interact with physically (Nachi and I would probably have eaten each other up by the end of the lockdown otherwise). Aditi and Bhavya's families lived in the same building as us, so the five of us essentially lived at each other's houses for the first month or so, playing endless rounds of cards, board games and hide-and-seek (After a few weeks, no one wanted to look at a Monopoly board ever again). But after a while, the initial excitement of 'wow! It's a pandemic! It's a worldwide disease that we're living through!' paled, and all we wanted to do was run around outside like crazy dogs. Going to the balcony and seeing the birds and insects soaring smugly through the air was torture. Every day was just waiting, waiting, waiting. ere were a few memorable highlights of the lockdown, though, that helped relieve the tedium. One was the time we were all made to stand on our balconies to drive the virus away. e clanging of pots and pans interspersed with the cries of small children shrieking 'go, Corona, go!' at regular intervals made quite a spectacle. Another was when Bhavya got two dogs home. Casper was a little black creature, no bigger than a rat. He just bumbled around the whole first day, making absolutely no sound. And then, Rusty showed up later in the day, a brown ball of fluff with two floppy ears and jet black eyes. Once they came, we only went home to eat and sleep; the rest of the time we were only at Bhavya's. Little things like this (well, getting the dogs wasn't a little thing) did do a lot to liven up the days. But on the whole, I was extremely relieved when the lockdown ended and we were free to emerge from our dens once again. - 33 -

Until Tomorrow Usha One last valiant effort e now-forgotten clouds To shed light Turning black with displeasure And then it implodes Spread out like smoke Drawing in light and warmth, From a fire Casting long shadows Slowly burning itself out Calling to black silhouettes of Trying to conserve energy Birds and translucent dragonflies For tomorrow Wafting westward, Leaching colour from Proud, puffed up rain clouds And pink-stained skies Nothing much left Except a faint glow of embers Softly pulsating Just above a clump of trees On the horizon ~ Tanu



It Feels Different To Stay At Home Adi Staying at home and studying feels strange. It feels like as though it is summer holidays because I have been staying at home. I have gotten used to staying at home. When school closed last March, I was bored for a month. I asked Kumaran uncle in the end of April and beginning of May, how he keeps himself from getting bored. He told me that he keeps himself occupied by gardening, cooking and reading. I also decided to keep myself occupied by studying, reading, watching 'BBC World news', playing chess and watching 'Chota Bheem'. Speaking to people on the phone felt strange because I've never done this before. After the summer holidays, I started having online Zoom meetings with Sharad Bhaiya. We were just chatting, not having any class. I finally got used to speaking to people on the phone. After the March long weekend, Sharad Bhaiya told me that after I finish Physics and Computer Science which I was going to do in May, he may take online class for me provided I do subjects that he can teach. My plan was to start Economics and English in June. I got lots of time to study because of remaining at home. I feel it's good that Covid has given me time to study. But, many people have lost their jobs and lives which makes me sad. I managed to finish the entire Physics and Computer Science paper 1 and paper 2 syllabus. Before Covid my parents used to ask me to stay at home and study which I wasn't willing to do. I also used to keep telling my school teachers and parents that I want to go in the yellow van rather than the white van because there are more people to talk to in the yellow van. I get to avoid this problem by staying at home. Also I never liked doing Physics experiments with Pradosh in school because in September 2019, we were talking about Physics and Chemistry in general (not what is in the IGCSE physics syllabus). I couldn't understand much about the content of the conversation and lost interest in it slowly. So, I developed a stereotype towards him and decided that I don't like doing Physics with him. When I did my first experiment with him in January 2020, he asked me about what I knew in Physics and based on that, we did some experiments on those topics. On that day, once I went home I told my dad that he doesn't know much Physics. My dad then told me that he specialised in Physics. Later, my dad, Pradosh and I did Physics together till mid-February 2020. I used to keep saying 'only if you're Vishwanath uncle, I will do Physics with you'. Later in the lockdown and after that, I started saying if you want to teach me Physics, you must go and live in North Korea'. I also didn't enjoy doing Physics with him because I wanted to do it with Vishwanath uncle who isn't new. Pradosh was new so I wasn't happy with him. Covid protected me from this problem which I like. Before Covid, I wanted Pradosh and the Aurigas to catch Covid because then Vishwanath uncle won't have to take Math and Physics for the Aurigas so then he can teach me Physics. I have not been able to go out to restaurants till December with my parents. In January, things became better and we went for a snack once and for lunch twice. In February, we went for dinner. It was very different from normal because I had to be extra careful about what I touch. ese conditions felt strange but still, I enjoyed eating in a restaurant after a long time. For things like Pizza, we could order them home which I liked. - 36 -

A week before lockdown (2020), all of us in our apartment were advised not to play any games together because of Covid. I was only running. I used a stick to press the lift buttons and never touched my eyes, ears, nose or mouth with my hands till I came back home and washed my hands. I did this whenever I went out. Only for running I did not wear a mask but otherwise I always did. I did everything other than wearing a mask as well, as I mentioned above including social distancing with others. Life Indoors Yash e lockdown was originally intended to be twenty-one days long. Twenty-one days isn’t bad, it’s a nice three week holiday to relax at home; you could watch new shows, play board games with your family, catch up on all your studies, play video games with all your friends, try coding or something to feel useful. But of course, it wasn’t just twenty-one days. It started off alright, I took on a laid-back attitude to my work and indulged in all the things I’d normally watch my time on; I booted up my Xbox, I started watching new shows, watched youtube videos and a couple of friends and I started playing a multiplayer game together regularly. I couldn’t keep that going for long, I started doing more productive things; I explored online courses on psychology, physics, programming and the human body. I read a few books on social psychology and economics and I learned touch typing. I started exercising because I hadn’t done anything physical in a long time. Online classes began and I spent more time on my normal academic work and I found a new way to take notes which really interested me, it increased my workload but I didn’t mind because I was still motivated and wanted to work on it. But slowly, things changed. My days started getting repetitive, everything seemed monotonous and my motivation had taken a severe beating. I crawled through my work at a snail's pace, taking more time and feeling more tired and weary in the process, even missing a few target dates. I had more online classes, which took more time. I had long since paused my online courses and hadn’t picked up a book in a while. I stopped making notes, putting it off for ‘later’. I had stopped exercising. I spent more time on social platforms - I had started using them, after the online game we played together had been banned. At this point all I did during my day was study, have classes, look at reddit, youtube and listen to music Maybe I could have done more things. I could have tried a new art or learned how to cook, but I think the monotony of living within that small space for a whole year would have caught up with me anyway. People aren’t made for this - living most of their life in that little space, spending lots of time online - it’s unnatural. - 37 -

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ೋದ ವಷ ಾ ೌ ಸಮಯದ ಬಹಳ ಕಷ ಆ ತು. ನ ೊ ಬ ೆ ೆಲಸ, ಸಂಬಳ. ನನ ೆಂಡ ೆ ೆಲಸ ಇರ ಲ. ಾ ೆ ಕಟ ೇ ೇ ಾ ತು. ಮಕ ಳ ಾ ಾಸ ೆ ೋ ೊ ೊಂ ೆ. ಅದರ ಬ ಕಟ ೇ ಾ ತು. ಾ ೌ ಸಮಯದ ಾ ೆ ಕಟ ೆ ೇ ಾ ತು. ಇಲ ದ ೆ ಮ ೆ ಾ ಾ ಅಂತ ಒ ಾಯ ಾ ದು . ಸರ ಾರದವರು ಮೂರು ಂಗಳ ಾ ೆ ೊ ೋ ಾದು ಅಂತ ೇಳ . ಆದ ೆ ಓನಗ ಳ ಾವ ಮ ೆ ಕ ೋದು ಾ ೆ ೋಸ ರ. ಾವ ಾ ಂ ಾಲ ಕಟ ೇಕು ಅಂತ ೇ ದು . ಾವ ಪ ಾ ೆ ಕಟ ೇ ೇ ಾಯು. ಊಟ- ಂ ೆ ಕಷ ಾ ತು. ಈಗ ಸ ಲ ಪ ಪರ ಾ ಲ. ನಮ ೆಂಡ ಾಪ ಾ ಯ ಅ ೆ ೆಲ ೆ ೋ ಾ ೆ. ಸಧ ೆ ಮಕ ಳ ಓದು ಮು ಾ ೆ. ಮಗ .ಎ. ಾ ಾ ೆ. ಮಗಳ ೕಮ ಾ ಾ ೆ. ಅವ ಬ ರೂ ೆಲಸ ಹುಡುಕುವಷ ರ ಾ ೌ ಆ ತು. ನಮ ೆ ಸ ಂತ ಜ ೕ ಲ; ಮ ೆ ಲ. ೕ ೆ ೆಲಸ ಾ ೊಂಡು ೕವನ ಾಡ ೇಕು. ಕ ೆದ ಇಪ ತು ವಷ ಂದ ಾ ೆ ಕಟು ಾ ಇ ೕ . ಏನು ಉ ಾಯ ಾ ಾ ೆ ಆ ಲ. ಈಗ ಬರುವ ವಷ ದ ೇಶ ೆ ಒ ೆ ಾ ೆ ಾಕು. ಈ ಾ ೆ ೋ ೆ ೆಲಸಗಳ ಗು ೆ. ನಮ ೆಂಡ ೆಲ ೆ ೋ ೋ ಮ ೆಯವರು ಬ ನ ಬ ೇ ಡ. ಮ ೆಯ ಮಕ ಾ ೆ. ಸೂ ಟ ನ ಾ ಅಂ ಾ ೆ. ನಮ ಹ ರ ಅ ೆಲ ಇಲ. ಈ ಸಮಯದ ನಮ ಂ ೋ ೆ ಕಷ ೇ. ಬಡವರು ಾಲ ೊ ೊಂ ೆ ನ ೕ ಾ ಾ ಾ ೊ ಅಂತ ಂ ೆ ಾ ಾ ೆ. ಈ ನ ಪ ಯ ದು ೇ ಇಲ ರು ಾಗ ಾಲ ೇ ೆ ಾ ಾ ಾ ೋದು? ಅ ೆ ಏ ೋ ಒಂದು ಉತರ ೊ ೆ ೕಕು. ಇನು ಎಷು ವಷ ೆ ಜನ ೆ ೆಮ ಕು ೋ ೊ ಲ. ಮ ೆ ೋ ೋನ ಾ ಆ ಾ ಇ ೆ. ಮ ೆ ಾ ೌ ಾ ೕ ಅಂತ ಸ ಾ ರ ೇ ಾ ೆ. ಮ ೆ ಾ ಾ ೆ ಾವ ಏನು ಾಡ ೇಕು ಅಂ ಾ ೆ ೊ ಲ. ಮುಂ ನ ಸ ಾ ರ ಇ ಾಗ ಂಗ ೆ ೩೦ ೆ ಅ ೊ ೋರು. ಈಗ ಂಗ ೆ ಬ ೕ ೫ ೆ ೊ ೆ ಏನು ಾ ಾಗು ೆ? ಾವ ೊರ ೆ ಅಂಗ ಯ ಅ ತರ ೆ ಆಗು ಾ? ಅ ೇ ಅ ಯ ೇ ೋ ೕವನ ಾ ಾ ಇ . ಬಡವ ೆ ಏನು ೌಲಭ ಇಲ. ಮ ೆ ಾ ಾನುಗಳ ೆ ೇನೂ ಾ ಆ ೆ. ೧೫೦ ರೂ ಾ ಎ ೆ ತಂ ೆ ಒಂದು ಾರ ಬರು ೆ. ಅದರ ೕ ೆ .ಎ . ೇ ೆ ಾ ! ಈ ಸ ಾ ರ ೋ ೆ ಾಕು ಅ ೆ. ನಮ ಏ ಾ ಎ ಎ ಏ ೕ ಾ ೆದ ೕ ೆ ನಮ ಕ ೆ ೆ ರು ೋಡಲ. ಬಡವರು ಎಷು ಜನ ಇ ಾ ೆ ಅ ೆ ಏನು ಾಡಬಹುದು ಅಂತ ಅ ೆ ಕ ಕ ಾ ೇ ಇಲ. ನಮ ೕವನದ ೊರ ೆಗಳ ಮು ಯುವ ೇ ಇಲ. ಾರ ಹತ ಎಷು ೇ ದು ಅದು ಬ ೆ ಹ ಯಲ. ೕವನ ಾ ೋ ೇ ಒಂದು ಕಷ . ನ ದು ದು ೊ ೕವ ೆ ಒಂದಲ ಒಂದು ೆನ ಇರ ೆ. ಆ ೆ ಕ ವ ಾ ಾಗ ಂದಲೂ ೆಲಸ ಾ ೊ ಂ ೆ ಬಂ ೆ. ಮುಂ ೆ ನಟ ಾಜ ಗುರುಕುಲದ ೆಲಸ ಾ ೆ. ಅ ಆಶ ಮದ ಗುರು ೆ ಅಂತ ಇದು . ೨೦-೩೦ ವಷ ಅ ೆಲಸ ಾ ೕ . ಒ ನ ಈ ಾ ೆ ಮು ೆ ನನ ಮಕ ೆ ೆಲಸ ಗು ೆ ಅಂತ ಆ ೆ ಇತು. ಅಷ ರ ಮ ೆ ಾ ಆ ಾ ಇ ೆ. ಈಗ ಮ ೆ ಾ ೌ ಅಂ ೆ ಮ ೆ ೋದ ವಷ ದ ಥರ ಕಷ ಆಗು ೆ. - ಕ ಣ (In conversation with Chikkanna) - 40 -

ಕ ೆದ ವಷ ದ ಾ ೌ ಪ ಾಮಗಳ . Gopi ೊ ೊನ ೋಂ ಂದ ಕ ೆದ ವಷ ಾ ೌ ಾಡ ಾ ತು. ಈ ಾ ೌ ಂ ಾ ೇಶದ ಬಡ ಜನರ ಬದುಕು ದುಸರ ಾ ತು ಾಗು ೇಶದ ಆ ಕ ಪ ಹ ತ ತು. ೌದು ೊ ೊನ ತ ೆಗಟ ಲು ಾ ೌ ಒಂದು ಪ ಾರ. ಆದ ೆ ಾವ ೇ ಮುನೂ ಚ ೆಯಲ ೆ ಾ ೌ ಾ ದು ೇಶದ ಜನರು ಪ ತ ಸುವಂ ಾ ತು. ೊ ೊನ ಬಂ ಾಗ ೇಶದ ಜನಗಳನು ಒಳ ೆ ಟು ೊಳ ಾ ತು. ಅದರ ಬದ ಾ ೇಶ ಂದ ಬಂದವ ೆ ಏ ೕ ನ ತ ಾಸ ೆ ಾ ಾ ರಂ ೈ ಾ ದ ೆ ೇಶದ ೊ ೊನ ಪ ಕರಣದ ಸಂ ೆ ಗಳನು ತ ೆಯಬಹು ಾ ತು. ಮುಂ ೆ ಸರ ಾರ ಾಗು ಜನರ ೇಜ ಾ ಾ ಂದ ೊ ೊನ ಪ ಕರಣಗಳ ೆ ದವ . ೕ ಾ ಸರ ಾರ ಾ ೌ ಎಂಬ ಪ ಾರವರವನು ಉಪ ೕ ತು. ಇದ ಂದ ಸ ಾ ಾತ ಕ ಾಗು ನ ಾ ಾತ ಕ ಪ ಾಮಗಳ ಆದವ . ಸ ಾ ಾತ ಕ ಪ ಾಮಗಳ : ೧. ಾಮೂ ಕ ಾ ೆಚು ದ ೊ ೊನ ಪ ಕರಣಗಳನು ತ ೆಯುವ ಸ ಲ ಮ ೆ ಯಶ ಾ ತು. ೨. ಪ ಸರ ಾ ನ ಗಣ ೕಯ ಾ ಕ ಾ ತು ೩. ೆಂಗಳ ರು ಮುಂ ಾದ ೊಡ ನಗರಗಳ ಾಹನಗಳ ದಟ ೆ, ಶಬಗಳ ಇರ ಲ ೪. ಇಂ ನ IT -BT ಜನಗಳ ೆಲಸದ ಒತಡ ಂ ಾ ಕುಟುಂಬದ ೊ ೆ ಸಮಯ ಕ ೆಯಲು ಆ ರ ಲ. ಾ ೌ ಂ ಾ ಕುಟುಂಬದ ೊ ೆ ೆ ಸಮಯ ಕ ೆಯುವಂ ಾ ತು. ಾಗು ಕುಟುಂಬದ ಮಹತ ತು. ೫. ಹಲವ ಯುವಕರು ಕೃ ಾಗು ಹ ಯ ಕ ೆ ೆ ಮುಖ ಾಡಲು ಸಹ ಾ ಾ ತು ೬. ಜನ ೆ ಓದುವ ಬ ೆಯುವ ೌಶಲ ೆ ತು ನ ಾ ಾತ ಕ ಪ ಾಮಗಳ : ೧. ಾವ ೇ ಮುನೂ ಚ ೆ ೕಡ ೆ ಾ ೌ ಾ ದರ ಪ ಾಮ ಾ ಹಲುವ ಮಧ ಮ ವಗ ದ ಾಗು ಬಡ ಜನರ ಕುಟುಂಬಗಳ ೕ ೆ ಬಂದವ ೨. ಕೂ ಾ ಕರು, ನಗೂ ೌಕರರು ೆಲಸ ಗ ೇ ಪ ತು ಗೂ ಅ ೆಯುವಂ ೆ ಆ ತು ೩. ಹ ಂದ ನಗರ ೆ ಬಂದವ ೆ ರು ಹ ೆ ೋಗಲು ಾ ೆ ವ ವ ೆ ಇಲದಂ ಾ ತು ೪. ಆ ೈ ಾ ಗ ಂ ಾ ಮಕ ಳ ತಂತ ಾನ ೆ ಗು ಾಮರದಂ ಾ ತು ಾಗು ಅವ ೆ ಾವ ೇ ೈ ಕ ಚಟುವ ೆಗ ಲ ಾದವ ೫. ಕ ಾದ ಆ ಕ ಚಟುವ ೆಗ ಂದ ೇಶದ ಆ ಕ ಪ ಾಆ ೆ ೬. ಾ ೌ ಸಮಯದ ೊ ೊನ ೆಸ ನ ಹಲವ ಭ ಾ ಾರಗಳ ನ ೆದವ ೭. ೕಸರು ಾ ೌ ಸಮಯದ ಜನ ೆ ರ ೆ ೕಡುವ ಬದಲು ಂ ೆ ಾ ದರು - 41 -

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