Whimpy kid-Last Straw

209

I yelled for help, but I really wish I didn’t call attention to myself. Because right when everyone came over to see what was going on, my pants came loose and fell down around my ankles. It wouldn’t have happened if I was wearing my own pants. But I never washed my dress pants after they got that chocolate all over them, so I was borrowing a pair of Rodrick’s pants, which were about two sizes too big on me. The situation was humiliating enough, but then I realized something even worse. I was wearing my Wonder Woman Underoos.



210

Eventually, Dad ran over and helped get me down, but not before Mr. Snella got the whole thing on tape. And something tells me that this time around, he has a good shot at the “America’s Funniest Families” Grand Prize. After that, Dad hustled me home, and I thought he was gonna be really mad at me. But it turns out that my accident happened right when Dad was next up to go in front of Seth Snella, so I saved him from having to take his turn. And get this: Dad thinks I faked the whole thing to bail him out. Son!That’s My Slap

I wasn’t about to correct him, either. I made myself a big bowl of ice cream, sat down in front of the tV, and tried to enjoy the rest of my one day of freedom as best I could.

211

Sunday When I woke up this morning, it was a quarter past 11:00. I couldn’t figure out why I was still in bed, because Dad was supposed to drive me to Spag Union at 8:00. BBlliinnkk So I went downstairs. Dad was sitting at the kitchen table reading the paper, and he wasn’t even dressed yet.

Sip

212

When I walked into the kitchen, Dad told me we could “rethink” this military academy thing. He said maybe I could just do some push-ups and sit-ups every once in a while, and that would be just as good as the summer conditioning program at Spag Union. I couldn’t believe my ears. I guess Dad felt like he owed me for saving him yesterday, and this was his way of paying me back. I walked out of the house and went up to Rowley’s before Dad could change his mind. And on my way up the hill, I realized that I was on summer vacation. TTwweeeett

TTwweeeett

213

I knocked on Rowley’s door, and when he answered, I told him I didn’t have to go to Spag Union after all. Rowley didn’t even know what I was talking about, so that just shows you how clueless he can be sometimes. We played Rowley’s Twisted Wizard 2 for a while, and then his parents kicked us out of the house.

So we grabbed some popsicles and went and sat on his front curb. You’ll never believe what happened next. A really cute girl I had never seen before walked up to us and introduced herself.

214

She said her name was Trista and that she just moved in down the street. Hi! I looked at Rowley, and it was pretty obvious he was thinking what I was thinking. So it took me about two seconds to come up with a plan. Clonk

Clonk But then I had a Better idea.

215

Rowley’s family belongs to a country club, and he’s allowed to bring two guests to his pool every day. So that could actually work out real nice. Go Fetch Us Some Slushies!

It looks like things are finally going my way, and you know, it’s about time. I don’t know anyone who deserves to catch a break more than me, because like I said before, I’m pretty much one of the best people I know.

216

And I know it’s really corny to finish with a happy ending, but it looks like I’m out of paper anyway, so I guess this is