june magazine

Positivity Pledge I pledge to honor and appreci- ate all fathers, celebrating their love, strength, and guidance. So, help me God

Contents 6 Becoming a father 8 One less lonely child 10 Mr Tapfumaneyi 12 Superman 14 Becoming a God-fearing man 16 The heart of a father 18 Masculinity, Feminism 20 The Reigning Miss Charity 24 Embracing masculinity 26 My father in law 27 The sceptre of masculinity 28 7 beginner friendly hairstyles 32 Writers’ Spotlight 33 Book Recommendations 35 Dear dad 36 Letter to all men 38 Dear soul, you’ve got it 40 Dear men, you’ve got this 42 Dear men, you matter too 44 Letter to my ex

Editor’s Note

“Doctor Ropfa” or strict he was and how to the bus stop. It was simply Doctor is privileged I am to have “Sekuru (grandpa) this, what he normally calls grown when the intensity sekuru that” all the way. At me. Yes, Ropfa (smiles) of his strictness has some point, mama and I not Ropa. He’s got his lessened with age. Baba decided to leave him. We unique way of calling my is indeed a man of prayer; walked a bit further and name and I love it that the genesis of our journey sat somewhere, waiting way. I am yet to bag a in Christ was shaped by for him. And guess what, doctorate and yet he’s his constant cultivation of we waited and waited till already addressing me as our spiritual lives. And for we decided to call him. one. I marvel at such faith that, we’re truly grateful. (chuckling). He is indeed and affirmation. That’s my friendly and sekuru to father for you. When my father sits with everyone. you, he takes time to listen There are so many stories A few days ago my and advice properly. He I can tell you about my sisters and I were having has mastered the ability father and I am sure you interesting conversations to listen and speak into too have anecdotes about about our family. We were the ears listening to him. your fathers. May we laughing, reminiscing What a man! During his always celebrate them, about the yesteryears. night shifts at work, we whether biological or not. “So what do you love would engage in deep To all the specific men about dad?” I asked. At conversations about life that play pivotal roles in this point, we were talking issues. I’m grateful for my growth, I celebrate you about our father, God’s gift such priceless moments. greatly. A special mention to us. And I believe that’s when I to Mr. Tapfumaneyi who’s became a night owl. gracing our cover this “Baba is loving and caring. month. Thank you, sir, I Back then he was a no- “Mercy is just like dad. cannot wait to meet you in nonsense man. Very strict. Everywhere she goes, person. He is caring, friendly and everyone there will end up Our deepest gratitude to so good at socializing. knowing her. That’s what our beloved writers who You cannot regret every baba does too,” my little birthed insights addressed moment you spend with sister threw in a comment. to all men as we celebrate him. He is a prayer warrior fathers. Peruse them and and a good advisor. That I laughed as I recalled share your thoughts with man is my hero,” one of a recent scenario when us, thank you! my sisters said. I visited our parents. With love As I was leaving they Millicent R. Sibanda I smiled knowingly. too decided to go back Growing up, I always home with me. We had heard about how strictly many stops on our way

BECOMING A FATHER By Terence Zizhou When there’s change our life’s meaning changes also and I must say this new chapter in my life has made me find something special that makes me feel alive. What is it like being a father? To sum it up in one word, “Overwhelming.” Certain perceptions come with fatherhood, that, if you don’t follow through on them you’re deemed a failure. So many responsibilities and expectations come with the title. Everyone expects you to execute fatherhood with perfection and these pressures that are piled up on fathers often tend to create stressful environments whereby we have to juggle work, being a provider and family life—spending quality time with the family. Most fathers become emotionally absent when they prioritize attaining material things over their 6 Deep Insight Magazine

children. The dilemma scariest moment ever. a few things, some are in having to put food You never know what great attributes but from on the table and having to expect, a twinge of some I’ve learnt what enough time to cater for worry ran through my not to do. Each day that the emotional needs of veins as I was restless comes is a privilege as I the family. At the end doing all sorts of get to spend it with my of the day they avoid researches on what to boy, learning new things emotional conversations do or how to handle about him. I embrace all with their children certain situations the hardships and joy and do not allow for a should they arise. I was that come with being a safe space for them to frantic with worry. father, I wouldn’t trade it discuss feelings. for anything. My son has The first time I saw my redefined my existence, I personally experienced son my heart smiled, how I handle myself, this in my childhood, so tiny yet his presence certain situations and my father was and filled the entire room. life in general. still is one of the most A cry broke out from hardworking people his lips and the echo With fatherhood it’s I’ve ever met but we of the piercing sound normal to have doubts, never got the time hung in the air. I was mixed emotions and nor an environment dumbfounded, tears fears but that’s the that facilitated certain glistened in my eyes but beauty of it all. It’s not a conversations. It was I had to hold them back. fantasy that comes with like, “Hey son are you I was overwhelmed perfection. Becoming sad? Here’s some with joy and fear of the a father changed me money go and do or buy unknown. Am I going to but it’s a change I’ll whatever cheers you surpass expectations welcome any day. up.” But we were cool or be a great dad or a like that, I didn’t mind as good role model to him? To my boy, just so you long as I was getting all I pondered to myself as know, when you read these treats I was living I held him in my arms this someday, when I’m my best life. It wasn’t for the first time with the barely breathing, when until I was a young adult hope that this was the I’m drowning in my own though that I realized onset of a strong bond sorrows, when I’m not the impact of the distant and healthy relationship somebody that I believe love we shared with my between the two of us. in, when darkness has father. engulfed my existence, All my life I’ve declared it only takes one look at I vividly remember the that I’m going to be a your smile for me to see day my son was born, great dad. Seeing other the light. it was happiest yet fathers I’ve picked up Deep Insight Magazine 7

ONE LESS LONELY CHILD By Rutendo E. Mafemba This is advice based he becomes a father. Yes, provided, was strong and on my observation fathers are expected to was a burden bearer but of my relationship be providers, to be strong he was never present be- with my father. In my lan- and to be burden bearers cause he was working, he guage I would say, “Regai too but this is often at the was unemotionally vulne- ndikurumei nzeve.” cost of not being present, rable and understanding emotionally vulnerable or because he was taught The expectations put on balanced. The things they that expressing any sort you oftentimes prohi- are told to do in order to of emotion is weakness bit you from eventually be regarded as a man are which left him unable to administering your true the very things that can connect with his children purpose [in equality] when hinder them from being a on an emotional level or if you become fathers. father. thinking that he was rai- Let me explain that. Men sing weaklings. are expected to be pro- These are two different viders, to be strong and roles and most people Some drug addicts, wo- [financial] burden bearers. suffer because they were manisers and depressed That sounds like what raised by a man that wa- people were made to be truly defines a man until sn’t a father. This man so because they are trying 8 Deep Insight Magazine

to fill a hole and have a re- His moments of weakness your hands on. lationship with something with His Father because that “speaks back” and He knew His Father would I don’t know what it’s like “understands them” or understand. What a Fa- to be a man or a father. even numbs the pain al- ther! This Son knew that I will never know. I will together because a man everything that He was never know what societal out there was unable to was because of His Fa- pressure does to you or play his role well. If a ne- ther. He did exploits, spre- having to bear the pain gative relationship with a ad His Father’s fame with of feeling like you cannot child can cause so much so much boldness, leaving provide for your family. I toxicity and paralysis in a a legacy that cannot be will never know what it’s child’s life, what more of a outrun and was all about like to be forbidden to positive relationship? His Daddy’s business. All feel sad, to cry or to pro- because the Father was fess that things are hard. I know of a story—it’s worth it. It’s clear that the That’s a burden I would true—of a boy born of a Fatherly nature had a di- never pray on anyone. But God which made Him a rect impact on everything. I do know the effect of a God too. I’ve never heard This God was a Father relationship that’s stan- of a father-child relation- first before He was God ding on an imbalanced ship like this. The boy was to His Son. If this wasn’t man’s shoulders and a always talking about His important He would never longing child. I’m living it. Father wherever He went. have revealed Himself as If the opportunity wasn’t Father to His Son and His I long for a day when Fa- given to Him He’d crea- creation. ther’s Day will be a day te it. He did everything truly worth celebrating in His power to establish You’re a father first before for every father. But today His Father’s Kingdom. you’re a doctor, a busines- we celebrate you because His Father was well plea- sman, a chef, a gardener, there is one less lonely sed with Him. These two a pastor, etc. Prioritising child, you are present and were so one that this Son your family, your chil- it’s always a blessing to could be vulnerable with dren will not disqualify have somewhere to start His Father. As powerful you from your job but it from. Happy Father’s Day as He was seeing that He will add more meaning to to all the dads out there! too was a God, He still felt everything that you put okay being vulnerable in Deep Insight Magazine 9

Unveiling the Power of Artificial Intelligence with Mr Tapfumanei by Kelvin T. Tsoka In today’s rapidly ad- some insights on what AI has found its way vancing world, the Artificial intelligence concept of artificial encompasses. It deals into numerous indus- intelligence (AI) has with a broad range of tries, transforming the gained remarkable at- technologies and meth- way we live and work. tention. AI refers to the odologies that enable In healthcare, AI has development of intelli- machines to perceive, been integrated into gent computer systems reason, learn, and make diagnostic tools, assist- capable of performing decisions. It involves ing doctors in detecting tasks that typically re- mimicking human cogni- diseases with greater quire human intelli- tive processes, such as accuracy. It has also gence. This conversa- problem-solving, pattern contributed to advance- tion with Mr Tapfumanei recognition, and lan- ments in drug discov- aims to explore what guage understanding. AI ery and personalized AI is, where it has been systems are designed to medicine. In finance, AI integrated, the possi- adapt, improve, and per- algorithms analyze vast bilities it holds, and the form tasks with minimal amounts of data to iden- challenges it presents. human intervention. tify patterns and make Mr Tapfumanei gave us predictions, enhancing fraud detection and Integration of AI: 10 Deep Insight Magazine

investment strategies. Challenges of AI: chatGPT which gave a Transportation is another While the potential of AI voice to the character Mr sector benefiting from is remarkable, it is not Tapfumanei. AI has also AI, with the development without its challenges. been seen participating of self-driving cars and One of the prominent in church, preaching to optimization of logistics concerns is the ethi- a group of people. One operations. AI has even cal aspect of AI. As AI would wonder will AI made its mark in the systems become more replace humans. Could entertainment industry, autonomous, questions AI take the place of Hu- powering recommenda- arise about accounta- man connection? The tion systems that sug- bility, transparency, and challenges surrounding gest personalized con- decision-making pro- AI, such as ethical con- tent to users. cesses. Bias in AI algo- siderations, bias, and Possibilities of AI: rithms is another critical job displacement, must The possibilities that challenge, as it can per- be addressed to ensure AI brings forth are ex- petuate discrimination responsible and benefi- tensive and profound. and reinforce existing cial implementation. As Improved efficiency and inequalities. Additional- we navigate the exciting productivity are one of ly, there are concerns frontier of AI, a thought- the key benefits of AI in- regarding data privacy ful and inclusive ap- tegration. Automation of and security, as AI relies proach will be essential repetitive and mundane heavily on vast amounts to harness its full poten- tasks frees up human of personal data. Job tial for the betterment of resources for more com- displacement due to au- society. plex and creative en- tomation is also a signif- Every single major com- deavors. AI also holds icant concern, requiring pany will also have AI the potential to provide thoughtful approaches to factories and you will personalized experienc- reskilling and workforce build and produce your es, tailoring services and adaptation. company’s intelligence. - products to individual Jensen Huang (NVIDIA’s preferences and needs. At first glance you may CEO at 2023 Computex In the field of healthcare, think Mr Tapfumanei is in Taiwan) AI can contribute to ear- a real Human who was ly disease detection, interviewed but this was Deep Insight Magazine 11 precision medicine, and an image generated by more effective treatment Adobe Firefly of a man plans. Scientific research in his 40s. The para- is also greatly acceler- graphs you have been ated through AI-driven reading before this one data analysis and simu- have been written using lations.

Superman? By Temwani S. Daka In my experience, the where I am from and one can greatest disservice we only imagine the values, or do for the male being is rather the lack thereof that raising him with the belief this would instil in a young that he is a supernatural boy in his formative being, without the need years…I would not see for normal human feelings it as separation of and an inflated desire to be duties, rather, I would respected. This upbringing view such chores as might even transform itself something unbefitting into expectations that one a man and I would huff might even have from their and puff the times sons, brothers, fathers or when I would lovers…however as amazing a be asked to person the man (men) in your care for life is, remember, we are not such superman, we are just human, specifically, a man. I grew up in a family that had more female children than males hence I was often the only boy in the house, although not the only boy in the family. I rarely was expected to do chores that were culturally deemed as “feminine”, for instance cooking, cleaning and the general upkeep of the household. Such an upbringing is not uncommon 12 Deep Insight Magazine

household chores. them. Many a time, in my believe it is not a manly Worse still, I believe earlier romantic ventures, trait to spend too much many men actually I would often be told time on the phone or to believe this and end up that it is like I don’t have spend too much time domineering over their feelings, which would with their lovers. Others siblings, spouses or even stem from an incorrect find it difficult to express their families because display of masculinity. I their vulnerabilities, or they believe that helping assert that this inability share their innermost out around the house is to emote was a result thoughts and feelings for beneath them. However, of growing up in an fear that their lovers will it is not weakness to help environment in which think less of them or even out in an environment men, rather, boys were fail to respect them as where you live, neither not expected to show a boyfriend or husband. will it make you less emotional feelings such However, if there is one deserving of respect. If as affection or being being whom you should anything, it shows that loving, which again were be spending time with, be you are caring and most feelings which were it in communication or likely will increase the associated with girls physically, it is your lover amount of respect you and women. Hell, even as this strengthens the gain in your family. As crying was frowned upon bond of your relationship. your children watch you as a boy, something as Furthermore, if there is as a man help out around ordinary and human! This one being you ought to the house, they will likely obviously makes many a be comfortable to show be more willing to help out boy grow up unconscious your emotional side, it as well, and their opinion of the need to display is those with whom you of what it means to be a affection towards his are romantically involved man may not be warped family, which of course with. This not only helps by misconstrued societal makes it harder to exhibit them understand you norms. displays of affection in a better as a being, it also romantic environment. helps them know that Societal norms really have like anybody else, you pushed men into fitting Some of my brothers are prone to feeling hurt, into a mould that may not have a difficult time even scared, disappointed and necessarily be helpful or talking or spending time that you enjoy being loved healthy to themselves or with their significant as well. the relationships around others, likely because they Deep Insight Magazine 13

BECOMING In today’s modern age, navigating A GOD-FEARING the challenges of masculinity and MAN addressing personal struggles can be a daunting task for young men. By Tanaka Chigomba Incorporating God’s word into this journey is a crucial aspect of growth. 14 Deep Insight Magazine In almost every conversation I hear about men, I noticed that man strug- gle to find a standpoint between their sexual urge and the word of God. I once read a book titled ‘Sex is not the problem (lust Is)’—it helped me to understand this subject and in this article are some of the key points that I learnt. To embark on the journey of becom-

ing a God-fearing man, it engaging in fellowship with significant challenge for is essential to grasp the other believers can pro- individuals struggling with concept of godly mas- vide valuable support and sexual addictions. Practic- culinity. The world often accountability on this jour- ing accountability in media portrays masculinity as ney. Overcoming sexual consumption is essential. dominance, aggression, addictions requires open- Installing content filtering and promiscuity, but the ness and vulnerability. It software, setting bounda- Bible gives a different is crucial to find a trusted ries on internet usage, and perspective. True mascu- accountability partner or being mindful of the media linity, according to God’s join a support group where consumed can help guard design, embodies qualities one can share struggles, against triggers and main- such as strength, honour, receive guidance, and find tain purity of heart and integrity, humility, com- encouragement. These mind. passion, and self-control. individuals or groups can Addressing the topic of provide a safe space for sexual addictions is an im- discussing challenges, Becoming a God-fearing portant step toward growth seeking advice, and re- man in this age requires and spiritual development. minding each other of dedication, self-reflection, Many young men today God’s grace and forgive- and an unwavering com- face the challenge of nav- ness. mitment to align one’s igating a hyper-sexualized life with God’s teachings. culture that glorifies instant Overcoming sex addic- gratification and objecti- Transforming one’s mind tion as a Christian young fication. Recognizing the is a critical aspect of over- man is undoubtedly chal- struggle and acknowledg- coming sexual addictions. lenging, but it is not insur- ing the need for change is Romans 12:2 encourages mountable. By cultivating vital to overcoming sexual believers to not be con- a strong relationship with addictions and becoming formed to this world, but God, seeking support and a God-fearing man. be transformed by the accountability, renewing renewing of your mind. the mind, and being inten- Developing a close rela- This transformation in- tional about media con- tionship with God is the volves replacing negative sumption, it is possible to foundation for transform- thought patterns, harmful overcome sex addiction ing one’s life and overcom- influences, and destruc- and embrace godly mas- ing any addiction. Through tive behaviours with God’s culinity. Remember, God’s prayer, Bible study, and truth. Regular meditation grace is sufficient, and attending church, Christian on Scripture, affirmations through Him, true transfor- young men can cultivate a of faith, and avoiding trig- mation is possible. deeper understanding of gering environments can God’s will and purpose for contribute to the renewal their lives. Seeking guid- of the mind. In the digital ance from mentors and age, the accessibility of explicit content poses a Deep Insight Magazine 15

THE HEART OF A FATHER By Ropafadzo K. Banda Everyone feels so lives because they are mentor, counsellor, leader, safe when their fa- the foundation so having teacher, helper, provider, ther is around. This one in your life is a huge motivator, the list is end- is so because they are blessing especially when less. As I mentioned ear- considered as superhe- he is stepping up. I know lier on, children feel safe roes. I can relate to this to some it might be hard and secure when they too; when I was young if to comprehend because have their fathers around. anyone did me wrong, I theirs never showed up A father must spend qual- would run straight to my for them or they’re gone, ity time with his children dad and report my case. bless their memories. For because he is their best With his hoarse voice, these reasons and many teacher. He is s strong he would say, “Aah aa others, some have never support system. To be aah what’s happening experienced fatherly love. here?” and all the kids Fortunately, we have a honest, would run away. I would Father who’s the father feel safe because I knew to the fatherless. He’s I had a strong backup. there for everyone…be- It’s in every child’s mind fore I get in deep let’s that their dad is a hero expound on the impor- who can fight everyone tance of fathers, why we and win. This in turn need them and why they boosts their confidence, should fulfill their responsi- garnering them superiority bilities. amongst their peers. To A father is a male figure all fathers, you’re the best! who’s a role model for How I wish you would their children, helping know how much we love them to reinforce good you as your children. I morals and behaviours believe you shall all see thus enabling them to your importance through grow in every area of this article as a token of their lives. A father is a appreciation. Fathers are friend, encourager, trainer, a need not a want in our 16 Deep Insight Magazine

from my perspective, fa- weather conditions. My we have a great father thers are not as stingy as heart bleeds because in heaven—GOD— mothers who tend to work they still manage to put who loves you, protects with budgets. I’m sure on a smile but behind that you, and provides for some of you can relate smile there’s pain. The you when no one can. to this. I remember when majority are putting on Everything you need is in I was in boarding school a mask. Sad. To make Him, seek Him and you I would buy as much as matters worse, some of will find Him with all your I wanted for my tuck if I them have children who heart as the bible says in was with my dad but with have resorted to drugs the book of Romans. my mom, it was a differ- and stealing just so they A father is a father no ent story. She would write can buy drugs. To some matter what, even if he’s a tuck list and strictly extent, these behaviours old he is your father, even prohibited me from going can be attributed to the if he is disabled he is still off budget, anything extra absence of father figures. your father, even if he is would be removed. Good Although some fathers poor he is still your father, old times! (laughs) have departed from earth, even if he abandoned you there is a need for non-bi- he is still your father. As My salutation ological fathers to step in a child play your role by goes to all even if they’re relatives or respecting him, loving him not. Therefore, if you’re and helping him. Make a single moth- a man and you have a call, pay a visit, send him ers who family that you have never flowers, show him that he are rais- shown responsibility, it’s is important. And to all ing their high time you do the need fathers, the best thing you chil- and play your role as a can do for your children dren, father. I know it might be is to love their mother. Let hard but forgive yourself them know what love is stand- and take every step of from you first. ing in change, bonding with “Every day is a Father’s the gap your kids, and spending Day and a Mother’s Day, for the ab- time with your family. And don’t wait for a calendar sent fathers. It’s to those who are yet to to remind you about it. not easy out there yet be fathers, do take some Let’s all be responsible as they toil and make sure time to acquire knowledge their children by honour- there’s food on the table. about fatherhood from ing them; God used them I have seen some women those who have gone as vessels for if there struggling to sell their before you, read books were not here, you and I merchandise in harsh and watch movies. To my wouldn’t be here.” brothers and sisters who have lost their fathers, Deep Insight Magazine 17 whoever has taken it upon themselves to fill that role deserves respect and honour. Above all,

MASCULINITY, FEMINISM and the Great Rise in Men’s Mental Illness by Victor Jingo 18 Deep Insight Magazine

Men’s mental Men are often expected masculine norms and health has been to be strong, stoic, and promote healthy behav- a topic of in- unemotional, which can iors and attitudes for creasing concern in make it difficult for them men. This might involve recent years, as more to express their feelings advocating for increased people begin to recog- or seek help when need- emotional expression, nize the unique chal- ed. In some cases, men promoting positive body lenges and pressures may feel like they have image and self-esteem, facing men in today’s to suppress their emo- or challenging gender world. In particular, the tions entirely in order stereotypes. rise of feminist and so- to fit in with the cultural - Practice self-care: Men cietal expectations has norms around masculin- need to prioritize their created a complex set of ity. own mental health and expectations that can be So what can be done to well-being, just like any- difficult for men to nav- support men’s mental one else. This might in- igate, leading to issues health in this complex volve taking time to relax with mental health and environment? Here are a and recharge, engaging well-being. few ideas: in activities that promote On the one hand, femi- - Encourage open com- positive mental health, or nist ideals have brought munication: One of the seeking out professional many positive changes most important things support when needed. to society, particularly in we can do is to create At the end of the day, terms of gender equali- a space where men men’s mental health is a ty and confronting toxic feel comfortable talking complex and multifacet- masculinity. However, about their feelings. This ed issue. By promoting the pressure to live up to might involve creating open communication, these ideals can be in- men’s support groups, challenging harmful tense for men, who may promoting therapy and norms, and prioritiz- be unsure about how to counseling services, or ing self-care, we can reconcile their own de- simply being more open help men navigate the sires and behaviors with and empathetic when challenges of living in a the expectations of oth- men share their strug- world full of feminist and ers. gles. societal expectations. Similarly, societal ex- - Challenge toxic mas- pectations around what culinity: It’s important Deep Insight Magazine 19 it means to be a man to confront the harmful can also contribute to aspects of traditional mental health concerns.

One on One with THE REIGNING MISS CHARITY 20 Deep Insight Magazine

Our interviewer, Brit- ney-Yvette Chiyoko, the reigning Miss Charity Intercontinental Zim- babwe 2023; charity organi- sation visionary, Vicfalls Artz Festival and Miss Leap year pageant founder had an inter- esting interview with Tatenda Njanike who is the current Mister Supranational Zimba- bwe 2023 and will be repre- senting Zimbabwe at Mister Supranational in Poland on the 15th of July. He is also the former Mister Zimbabwe Peo- ple’s Choice 2020, a commer- cial and fashion runway model pursuing a career in data sci- ence and digital content crea- tion. Mr Njanike is passionate about deploying his God-given gifts to present and promote both small and market leading brands to the global economy in creative ways. He happens to be an MC, a model coach and a consultant for Jacaran- da Culture & Media Corpora- tion. As if that’s not enough he’s also the creative and marketing director at Paz & Chivz Bespoke. He has worked with several brands like Truworths Men, Econet USSD campaign, Old Mutual, FBC Bank, Credisure and ZB Bank. As a fashion runway model he has worked and walked for Zarguesia brand, Fungai Muzorodza, House of Stone, Makanaka, as well as Vicenzo Valli and Style by Minie. Deep Insight Magazine 21

Qn: What is your definition of dence as a man? being a man? Ans: Confidence is founded Ans: Being a man is about on knowledge. Self confi- taking responsibility and care dence is unwavering knowl- of the people and environ- edge and understanding of ment around you. It’s being a who you are and what you good steward of the communi- will stand for, and also an ty you’re in and leading others understanding of your limits. who need a helping hand. By building confidence one is able to discover their true Qn: How does one become a identity. man of value? Ans: A man of value is a man Qn: What is really meant by of solutions. Being able to toxic masculinity? provide solutions to issues Ans:Toxic masculinity affecting your family, your is the result of years community and your nation of passed down through your natural talents or traits, habits and acquired skills. mind-sets that are Qn: How would you describe harmful to both men masculinity? and women, emo- Ans: I would describe mascu- tionally, physically linity as the habits and traits in and mentally. It is men that are socially accept- the misinformation able and appropriate. of what being a man is. Qn: What’s the difference be- Qn: Lets talk tween a boy and a man? about men men- tal health, how Ans: A boy fully depends on would you de- others within his proximity scribe people’s atti- to show up and address his tudes towards mental needs. A boy becomes a man health for men? when he changes his attitude and mind-set from that of one Ans: The negative ste- who waits for others to initi- reotypes surrounding ate responsibility to one who mental health affect takes control of his own needs men as well. If your and that of others whenever definition of what he can. being a man neglects Qn: How can one build confi- that a man has limits 22 Deep Insight Magazine

and often needs help in times of need what’s your perspective on this and then you will perceive asking for help how can this be changed? as not being manly. A man who does Ans: We need to demystify mental not ask for help due to fear or shame health by focusing on the positives cannot fully become a responsible more than the negatives. What you steward of the world around him. A focus on grows. In order to take our man that does not seek help cannot power back from succumbing to neg- fully function as a man. ative stereotypes, our attention needs Qn: How do you deal with pressure to be redirected from merely focusing and stress? on the dark side of mental health, and Ans: I take time to pray, revisit bibli- promoting positive aspects of mental cal principles in the bible that prom- wellness such as positive attitude and ise peace. I also listen to songs from outlook toward self and others, teach- my favourites gospel ministers. If the ing people to discover purpose in what they do and how to tackle different and problem seems to persist I turn to my challenging situations in life. friends for their comfort and coun- sel. These help me to determine Qn: If there’s anything you would whether I should rest or simply change in today’s community what endure the season. would that be? Qn: What do you consider as Ans: I would promote more love and the biggest barriers towards forgiveness. Life is imperfect and men’s mental health? being more compassionate towards Ans: Not knowing when and people and teaching one another that how to share responsibili- it’s part of life to experience difficult ties. If you have 40% ca- circumstances and even when you fail pacity in you on a bad day, from time to time you are still a valua- week or season and you ble part of society. give the 40% you have, you would have given Qn: What’s your general advice to fel- 100% of what you have low men? and that is enough. When Ans: Our value in society as men can we are compassionate as a only be realised when we stand to- society, expectations can be gether in good and in bad times. It is also important for us to know that redefined in order for people to thrive masculinity without love and compas- under any circumstances. If a man is sion will hold us back from shaping the a solution provider, when he thrives world around us. everyone thrives. Deep Insight Magazine 23 Qn: Men have voiced online that opening up about mental health struggles is not easy—this may be due to male stereotypes—

EMBRACING MASCULINITY A Message to the Youth By Tanaka Chigomba In a world where societal expectations and stereotypes often shape our un- derstanding of masculinity, it’s crucial for the youth to redefine and embrace their own versions of manhood. The journey towards a healthy and positive understanding of masculinity begins with self-reflection, empathy, and the rejection of harmful stereotypes. Society often tries to fit men into pre- determined molds, but it’s essential to understand that everyone is unique. Em- brace your individuality, celebrate your strengths, and explore your passions without feeling pressured to conform to traditional expectations. Remember, true strength lies in being authentic to your- self. Contrary to popular belief, displaying emotions and vulnerability is not a sign of weakness. Developing emotional in- telligence allows you to understand and manage your emotions effectively, foster- ing healthier relationships and personal growth. Learn to express yourself openly, seek support when needed, and cultivate empathy towards others. Treat everyone with respect, regardless 24 Deep Insight Magazine

of gender. Embrace cising, healthy eating, personal growth. Re- the concept of gender and getting enough rest. member, learning from equality and challenge Seek help and support others’ experiences can harmful stereotypes that when facing mental be invaluable. perpetuate inequality. Be health challenges, as an ally, stand up against seeking assistance is In navigating the com- sexism, and work to- a sign of strength, not plexities of modern mas- wards building a soci- weakness. culinity, remember that ety where everyone is being a man is not de- valued and respected. Reframing masculini- fined by outdated stere- Healthy relationships ty in a positive light is otypes or societal expec- are built on mutual trust, essential. Instead of tations. Embrace your communication, and focusing on aggressive individuality, cultivate respect. Understand behavior or dominance, emotional intelligence, the importance of con- aim for qualities such as and strive for equality sent, boundaries, and empathy, kindness, and and respect. By practic- active listening. Strive compassion. Understand ing positive masculinity, for equality and support that true strength comes you can make a signifi- your partner’s personal from lifting others and cant impact on your own and professional aspi- being a force for posi- life and the lives of those rations. Remember, a tive change in the world. around you. Let us forge strong man uplifts those Seek out positive male a path towards a future around him. role models who embody where men are celebrat- the values and qualities ed for their authenticity, Taking care of your you admire. Surround compassion, and com- physical, mental, and yourself with mentors emotional well-being is who can guide you on mitment to creating a crucial. Prioritize self- your journey towards more inclusive world. care activities like exer- self-improvement and In navigating the complexities of mod- ern masculinity, remember that be- ‘‘ing a man is not defined by outdated stereotypes or societal expectations. Embrace your individuality, cultivate emotional intelligence, and strive for equality and respect.’’ Deep Insight Magazine 25

MY FATHER IN LAW, A BLESSING By Hazel Maseko To be a man takes human they are gods to the giver, the one who courage, love, many whether biologi- sacrifices all the time, a strength, patience, cal or not. They give out man of honor in his vil- kindness, and embrac- pure and genuine love, lage and wherever he is ing imperfections. How building and molding us known, and a communi- men feel and how much to be firm and wise, pav- ty leader. His love and weight they carry is ing the way. I remem- selflessness are what something we don’t fully ber when I first entered makes him stand out. So understand. When life my marital home I was many people have been gets hard on them, we scared because the only molded by his guidance don’t see them showing person I knew was my and leadership includ- emotions as it is seen husband and there was ing myself. I am a better as a sign of weakness. no way that we would version of myself since They keep grinding, be together 24/7…then I I became a part of his pushing, fighting, slaving met my very welcoming family. themselves and holding father in law. He em- on because what they braced me as his own Thank you for always provide at home is what daughter, welcoming believing in me and my is seen. The world may me with open arms. He little family. sometimes be harsh on made it easier for me them yet they still love to settle in. Indeed he unconditionally and un- is a living epistle of the apologetically. grace of God upon men. The family is standing Believe you me; men because is the patri- are the world to a lot out arch, a true reflection there. They are the cour- of a family man. He is age givers, the strength known to be the father to to hold onto and the rays the fatherless, the path- of hope. Men aren’t just finder, the kingmaker, 26 Deep Insight Magazine

THE SCEPTRE OF MASCULINITY By Trevor Mukarati Voices in my sleep calls for my awakening It’s hard to look alive in a metal coffin of poverty Being the head of the family doesn’t do well without a hat. Sometimes the world gets cold. And you’ll be there to unfold the untold pain with tears wich cannot be shed, Complaints wich will never be heard. It’s now on paper A man has to stay strong Who speak the language of masculinity Who writes the literature of perseverance There have been ambiguity on commitment based on archievement. Every man have to work To change the future Break chains of generational curses And light the future like an inferno I’m taking a moment away from the scroll To read from the wall About the war The stories of departed fathers Who breathed air with pride There’s more to that They raised warriors Now freedom is our daily bread They declared security and now we got immunity. Man built communities, and dissolved all the impurities with their sacred voices of honor, married women, and allowed their love to glow and cover our land like the glorious mist in the morning Deep Insight Magazine 27

7 Beginner Friendly Natural Hair Styles By Tatenda Matorevhu 28 Deep Insight Magazine

Transitioning to natural hair can be One thing you will love and enjoy is the quite confusing, what’s with all the versatility of our hair. From Teeny Weeny terms, routines and styles to learn. Afro to long hair, you can do so many It’s easy to get lost and overwhelmed diverse styles with your hair. Peruse as a newly natural. You are not alone as through some beginner friendly stylish all of us have been there at some point. hairdos you can easily do by yourself in However it gets easier as you learn to the comfort of your home. embrace your nappy curls and as your crown grows bigger. Cornrows This is a simple style that’s braided close to the scalp. It can be worn anywhere and everywhere. Double it up with a wig and you get to rock two High puff A quick and easy no fuss style, you can never go wrong with a high puff really. The high puff looks good with anything and is suitable for all occasions. If your hair is on the shorter side no worries, you can buy a detachable puff to achieve this look. Low puff It is basically the same as a high puff, but like it’s name suggests it’s positioned lower, at the back of your head. Add some gel to create a more sleek and shiny look. Alternate between a low and a high puff to create versatility. Deep Insight Magazine 29

Bantu knots Despite the name these aren’t really knots but buns. They are achieved by a certain twisting and wrapping of your hair. Bantu knots can be worn as a knot out, simply un- ravel the knots to enjoy a wavy style Good ol’ Afro Flaunt your hair in this easy, low maintenance style. It is perfect for all lengths of hair. Moisturize and comb out your hair and you are ready to go Mini twists/Mini braids Done on dry hair, mini twists and mini braids can last up to a month and can be styled in so many ways. For twists you can alternatively do wet twists, which set better and have less risk of unravelling. Twist Out Like the bantu knot out, you get to rock gorgeous curls and waves on your hair with this style. Divide your hair in sections, twist them and un- ravel carefully when they are dry. 30 Deep Insight Magazine

“No man stands taller than when he stoops to help a child.” - Abraham Lincoln Deep Insight Magazine 31

Writers’ Spotlight Hey fam! Meet Terence Zizhou. He’s the writer of theis edition’s the spotlight. We managed to glean important intel from him… What’s your biggest pet peeve? •Long talkers If there was a movie about you, who would play your character? •Will Smith What’s a skill that you have that many people do not know about? •Giving advice although I suck at taking my own advice haha What’s your favourite word? •Pain Your Favourite tone of writing? •Emotional Any quote from one of your writings? • “I ache as I reminisce about the good times I took for grant- ed, the beautiful moments I didn’t take in because I thought would last forever.” Thank you Terence! Read his article in this edition titled, ‘The big chop’ and check his book recommendation. 32 Deep Insight Magazine

Book Recommendations The Things We Left Unsaid By Emma Kennedy Delves into the intricate web of unexpressed feel- ings, untold stories, and unresolved conflicts that shape our lives. With sensitivity and depth, Kenne- dy examines the repercussions of these unspoken truths, weaving a captivating narrative that reveals the power of words left unsaid. It Ends With Us By Colleen Hoover A captivating romance novel that navigates the com- plexities of love, heartbreak, and personal growth. With raw emotions and a powerful narrative, Hoover tells the story of Lily Bloom and her journey to con- front the painful realities of her past and find her own strength. Finding Me By Viola Davis A memoir that chronicles the inspiring journey of the acclaimed actress. From her humble beginnings in poverty to her rise in Hollywood, Davis shares her tri- umphs, struggles, and the moments of self-discovery that shaped her into the remarkable artist and advo- cate she is today. Born a Crime By Trevor Noah A captivating memoir that explores the author’s child- hood in apartheid-era South Africa. Noah reflects on his experiences as a biracial child, navigating the complexities of identity, racism, and survival. With wit and honesty, he shares stories that highlight both the hardships and resilience of his upbringing. Deep Insight Magazine 33

Letters to men 34 Deep Insight Magazine

Dear Dad Hello young man. It’s been a while. I “Gold and silver I may tated some may be. You should write more not have, to give. But believe what you believe often. That means I will God should grant you and are not sorry for it. I of course. We wouldn’t all the blessings He has pray for that strength of want anyone thinking we to offer the good and mind. don’t do this all the time, obedient children. For I hope it doesn’t come would we? It’s Interna- you are a shooting star”. as too much of a shock, tional Father’s Day and You wrote me that when but I look up to you. If guess what? It means I I was thirteen. I hadn’t one day the good Lord get to go down memory spotted anyone remotely blesses me with a fam- lane and be cheesy. I familiar in the crowd of ily of my own, I want to can get away with it too, family and friends. And be the kind of a mother this time of the year. as usual, I was wishing to them that you would Do you remember all I hadn’t won anything. be proud of. You are the those school functions I was envying my col- best father a girl could you came to? Thank leagues sitting in their ask for. you. Thank you for being undisturbed places of I am sorry for the tears a present and guiding ordinary. I was miserable we made you cry. For father. Thank you for until I saw you. I was so the disappointments you always supporting me happy I wanted to cry. I felt, I apologize. For the through those anxious did that quick backhand battles you fought for us, times. The podium never swipe across my eyes the known and the not- failed to feel like a pyre. and gave you an almost so-known, we are grate- Those were some of the composed smile. You ful. The agony we may loneliest times for me. said, “Well done achi- have caused you. I hope Weird right? You’d think hera”, and handed me we make you proud they were my happiest. that treasured note. You enough to ease the pain. I was always anxious. made me happy. You You have always been Afraid that no one would made me rich. there. That’s your super- show up. And that I’d be When I am down, I power, and I thank God alone on that big stage, know I can come to you. you are my father. with strangers looking I know you will listen Your loving daughter on. It’s such a paradox, and understand what I Tendai because I also knew, my wouldn’t be understand- dapper dad would show ing myself. You have a Deep Insight Magazine 35 up. Suited up and all. way about you. I love how you stick to your guns no matter how irri-

A letter to all the men By Tapiwanashe Matorevhu Ihave been scratching least...we recognize all you der enough pressure. The and scratching my head do and we thank you. strongest of pillars need to try and find the per- In a world where mental an even stronger foundati- fect words to pen down health is the order of the on to stand on. You’re not for this month’s article. day but there seem not to invincible, it’s okay to be Celebrating men. It would be enough safe spaces human and express your have been easier if I was for you, we want to let you concerns as well. You’re a man. Maybe I would be know that you’re seen and seen, you’re heard and able to find something re- you’re heard. In a world you’re loved. latable. I would really un- where you’re expected to Dear men, in a world whe- derstand and comprehend lead, guide and protect, re the focus and intend is what it is and what it takes who will look out for you? on protecting the women, to be a man. But then l In a world where you need I want you to know that thought what’s best than to have it all figured out, you’re not forgotten. We to write a note of appre- who will hear out your see you, we love you. We ciation to all the men out fears and doubts? You’re admire, we respect you. there. So here it goes... worthy of love, you’re wort- May you always remem- hy of support. You deserve ber all these words when Dear Men to also focus on the things the walk gets tough and Despite not really unders- that will heal, encourage you feel less of a person. tanding how your world and strengthen you to go When the pressure threa- works we want to let you on. tens to drown you. Know know that we stand with You’re supposed to be that you’re important, you, by you and for you. strong and yes you’re st- you’re loved, you’re seen For all the work you do, rong but always remember and you’re heard. the sacrifices you make, you’re human too. Even Yours truly we are truly grateful. when you face pressure you’re expected to not In a world where you show any signs of strugg- may seem forgotten, we le. The pressure of being a remember you. For so- pillar can be hard to bear. meone whom we expect Remember even the st- a lot from but yet it seems rongest iron buckles un- like you’re celebrated the 36 Deep Insight Magazine

‘‘Dear men, You’re not forgotten. We see you, we love you. We admire, we respect you. Deep Insight Magazine 37

DEAR SOUL, YOU GOT THIS By Chikomborero Dapira 38 Deep Insight Magazine

Most times I get to lot but your existence and like anyone else’s. Don’t ask myself how the space you are occupy- deprive us of the gifts and people get to fill ing on this earth is impor- the potential within you the void in their lives which tant hence this letter I’m that we need to see and might have been caused addressing to you, dear experience. Don’t deprive by a number of factors or soul. us of the love and care events that happened in I don’t exactly know how that you need to show us. their lives. Mostly it’s how you are, trying to juggle You can balance it all be- someone called a man is everything that’s going on cause more than anything handling pressures and in your life and l am sorry GOD has got you. You are the depression accompa- about the stigmatization precious in His sight and nied by such. How does that’s there about men’s honoured and He loves that one soul balance it in mental health. Therefore, you (Isaiah 43:4). a society where he is also this is a gentle remind- Hey soul, being vulnerable expected to be strong and er to take a deep breath isn’t a sign of weakness. go through everything like because it’s your nervous Talk to that person and let a real man? Is depression system’s love language. it all out, give your mental different for men? How is Look for that place where being the break from it all that one soul really bal- you can be vulnerable when it needs it. Let God ancing it all? because those wounds of carry you because He is the heart and the scars on greater than our hearts I have talked a bit about the mind need it. Yes, vul- and minds. Just start by this to a number of people nerability sounds like truth taking a pause and a and the answer l got was; and feels like courage and deep breath and let it all “THAT MAN, THAT SOUL it aren’t always comforta- out. In taking small steps THAT IS TRYING TO PUT ble but it’s never a weak- like these, you will find ON A BRAVE FACE FOR ness. You might not have the pieces that you will THE SOCIETY DESPITE it all figured out now nor use to fill the void within EVERYTHING IS ACTU- seeing it working out soon caused by all the losses. ALLY CRYING FOR HELP but even if there is a crack You will somehow find AND HE ALSO NEEDS in everything, always re- the balance in the midst A SHOULDER TO LEAN member that that’s how of it all because you are ON AND A SAFE SPACE light gets in. Allow yourself capable of being the best TO VENT OUT”. More to experience what you brother, husband, friend, than anything, your mental need right now, whether workmate, boyfriend and a health is also important it’s space, rest, support, or father someone has ever just like that of any wom- just a simple pause and a had. an you see walking or you deep breath. You are not You’ve got it dear soul! are living with. Your smile a burden for taking care and your peace are as of yourself. Your mental Deep Insight Magazine 39 valuable as anyone else’s. health is so important just Yes, the pressures are a

DEAR MEN, YOU’VE GOT THIS We all have You climb mountains and scars to bury. heard stories of hardships and face Having been surrounded about women, challenges head on, by male siblings in my of how unique, special, keeping it together be- life, I got to understand and exceptional they are, cause you’re always men to some extent. the sacrifices they’ve reminded that real men Growing up with broth- made. I for one am a don’t cry. The world has ers proved to be difficult woman and I love to tried to classify you as sometimes but it was an be celebrated, but you, strong because it’s far eye opener, witnessing men, are also worthy of much easier to under- the struggles they face celebrating. You don’t stand than having to daily to keep up with always receive the value understand a little bit of society’s expectations. and gratitude you de- everything in you. My father, bless his serve. We often forget memory, an honourable the hardships and strug- Dear men, you carry man who’s so dear to gles you face day in day most of the burdens, my heart gifted us with out and for that, we’re facing disappointments, three strong men who sorry. struggles and great los- possess the same char- es and yet you try to acter and traits he had. Dear Men, you are a hold it together, suffer- He did his best to raise walking contrariness, ing in silence. You have such men of valour and both strong and soft, parts you’re yet to dis- deep and light hearted. cover, wounds to heal 40 Deep Insight Magazine

Dear men, ‘‘You carry most of the bur- dens, facing disappoint- ments, struggles and great loses and yet you try to hold it together, suffering in silence. You have parts you’re yet to discover, wounds to heal and scars to bury.’ I’m so grateful he fought you’re fighting for is say begins with the abil- a good fight. I can truly worth it, striving to over- ity to recognize when a say I’m blessed to have come everything that job is done. It’s a belief such a good example of comes your way be- that every exit line is an the kind of life partner I cause deep down inside entry that you’re moving desire to have in my life. you know you’re hunters, up, not out. God did not Cheers to all men who goal getters! Such brav- create you with an extra are doing the very best ery is worthy of emula- set of eyes on the back to raise a generation of tion. of your head because well groomed men! He did not intend for you Dear Men, You are sol- When all is said and to look backwards so diers. You fight for what done, I leave this to you: don’t rehearse your re- you believe in and never Sometimes, when things verse, press on we root- hold back. You March don’t work out as you ing for you, you got this! towards your dreams wanted, just know some- fiercely with boldness, thing better is coming Yours Sincerely holding your ground in your way. Sometimes, the face of conflict. You redirection is a helpful in- Debrah Chimwere break barriers with cour- tervention. Mistakes lead age and grace, facing you to lessons learned obstacles, reminding and trust the process. yourselves that what ‘Graceful exit’ as I like to Deep Insight Magazine 41

DEAR MEN, YOU MATTER TOO! You do get issues or men don’t cry. I’m not you can share with and that overwhelm disputing the fact that a not feel judged. you from time man is the head of the to time. From a tender house and the leader in And to the world; let’s age you’re taught to be the home, even the word create spaces for men strong, to be brave, to of God says so. But even to be able to reach out if be the head and to be the source needs refill- they want to. Just shar- the leader. You’re taught ing from time to time. It ing and opening up may to be the one who fixes needs maintenance or it be of great help. Letting things. But what hap- will be worn out and not it out helps a lot. I’m not pens when you need be as useful as it should saying every man who fixing too? Can a broken be. is stressed or is facing tool work effectively? some problems should Dear men, there is noth- reach out and get help You walk around with ing wrong with you get- (that would be nice a lot of baggage but ting help if you feel like though), but I’m saying if looking like everything you need it. There is one wishes to get help, is fine on the outside. nothing wrong in reach- they should be able to From an early age you’re ing out when you need do so without the so- taught to be “the man”. fixing. Be a man and get ciety tagging them as You’re taught to face the the help you need. Re- weak or less of a man. world and deal with it. member, you can’t give These tags have made Society has branded a what you don’t have. You some men to bury pain man who reaches out or can’t live life as a shad- deep inside, to pretend shares his problems as ow of yourself. Reach as if they are okay when a “weak man”. You hear out and get help. It may they are dying slowly on them saying, “Ita semu- not necessarily be a the inside. At least men rume” or “Wotoshinga therapist, maybe it’s a should be able to ex- semurume” or “Murume friend, a girlfriend, your press their need for help haacheme”. Be a man mom, brother, sister, wife without being treated or be strong like a man or anyone you feel like some type of way. 42 Deep Insight Magazine

Some of these deep help them and be there rooted issues may spring for them. up and cause problems in business handlings, Sometimes the fixer personal life, relation- needs fixing. A little ships etc. Some men maintenance to keep feel like detaching and things running smoothly dealing with it alone is and effectively. You can- the way to go. I know we not pour from an empty deal with pain in different cup. You need refuel- ways. But if the way you ling. You need a refill. deal with pain is pushing Get that refill so you can people away from you, keep on leading, keep that’s a problem. Time on being strong, keep on and space alone is okay, being a fulfilled man. If but shutting down and you need help please go shutting out the people get help!! Do it for your- you love and who love self and those around you every time you face you. Your mental health a problem is not the and well-being matters way to go. Especially for too. those in relationships or who are married, it may make your partner feel alienated or secluded. Yours truly Imagine someone pull- ing away from you every Ivy S. Chiworeka time they face something when all you want is to Deep Insight Magazine 43

Letter to my ex Dear Ex ars. Oh funny, it’s been this letter to say THANK years right and l am YOU. I don’t know where still writing to you. I and how to start. I was have tried to move on Thank you for letting taught that if it is a bu- but it’s like two steps me go. Of course, l cri- siness letter you start forward and one step ed for months but it with the purpose of your backwards. So yeah, l was worth it. All l ne- letter. If it is a friendly haven’t done much con- eded were answers to letter, you start with cerning that area. a lot of questions that greetings and updating Anyway, I hope you are l had. I blamed myself your friend about what’s good wherever you are. for everything that hap- going on in your life. You have probably for- pened back then. I tried But this is not a busi- gotten about me and l everything l could for ness letter, neither is it completely understand you to at least explain to a friendly letter because because our ‘forever’ in me what happened but we are no longer friends. love lasted only a few all was in vain. Howe- months. For the past ver, this taught me that I thought this was going few years I was trying l am only responsible to be easy to let out to figure out what went for something if l choo- everything that l have wrong. And l finally did, se to be. Just because felt for the past few ye- that’s why l am writing something bad happens to me or around me 44 Deep Insight Magazine

doesn’t mean that l have girl to jump and ask because that remote is to allow it to beat me whilst l am already mid- no longer working. down. air. Those days l didn’t A heart can’t be broken care that you had so- twice right. Thank you Thank you for always meone, all l wanted was for being the one to bre- not replying my mes- you. The rest didn’t mat- ak it. The scars that you sages or picking up my ter. But you know what, left me with are a re- calls. It was hard at first that whole experience minder that l will always but l later got used to it. taught me about sel- look back at every time It made me realise that f-worth. l fall in love. It’s with just because one person isn’t talking to me doe- Thank you for your ho- these scars that l know sn’t mean that the world nesty. You knew l wa- if this relationship l am has rejected me. Thank sn’t going to put up about to go into will be you for dating some- with your character. You good for me lest it turns one immediately after knew the type of per- into other scars again. we broke up. It was the son l thought you were I use it as a rear view hardest thing to watch. which was completely mirror to see where l am It was in those moments wrong. You had to call going and how l should that l learnt that no one the cards before we go navigate. If it wasn’t for is entitled to love me. any further. This is the you, l think l would have Love is by choice. You best thing that you did had a lot of ‘love acci- choose who you want for me in the relation- dents’. or don’t want to be with ship. At least l still got despite what people something good l see Yours Gratefully may say. from our relationship Ex Thank you for making which is the honesty you me your back-up. Yes, had when you were bre- you knew l was fragi- aking up with me. le and just one smile Honestly, until now l from you l would quit don’t know the actual everything and be at reason why you said we your service. Whenever should ‘pause’ our rela- you would say ‘jump’, tionship. But l am glad l wasn’t that girl who that you did. I just hope would ask how high that one day you will not first. I was the type of think of pressing ‘play’ Deep Insight Magazine 45