Mental Toughness Development Toolkit - 8 Sample Exercises

Created by: Doug Strycharczyk www.aqrinternational.co.uk

The Mental Toughness Development Toolkit The Mental Toughness Development Toolkit is an array of experiential exercises which can be run with individuals and/or small and large groups. It also works well in conjunction with outdoor experiential exercises. What is Mental Toughness – what can we assess and develop? Mental Toughness is a moderately plastic personality trait which determines in large part how individuals respond mentally to stress, pressure, opportunity and challenge. Research shows that Mental Toughness scores correlate closely with Performance; Well-being; Positive Behaviour and Aspirations. It has a significant impact on most key outcomes in the world of work. It applies to leaders and staff, and has universal benefits. As a concept, Mental Toughness embraces other well- known concepts and ideas such as resilience, grit, mindset, learned optimism and learned pessimism, as well as most definitions of character. Research shows that Mental Toughness has four elements often called the 4 Cs. Each has two sub-scales. This is shown below: MT Scale What this means … CONTROL Life Control – I really believe I can do it Emotional Control – I can manage my emotions and the emotions of others COMMITMENT Goal Setting – I promise to do it – I like working to goals Achieving – I’ll do what it takes to keep my promises and achieve my goals CHALLENGE Risk Taking – I will push myself – I am driven to succeed Learning from Experience – even setbacks are opportunities for learning CONFIDENCE In Abilities – I believe I have the ability to do it – or can acquire the ability Interpersonal Confidence – I can influence others – I can stand my ground if needed. We are able to assess mental toughness in terms of these components in individuals and groups through a unique 48 item high quality psychometric measure called MTQ48. It is normative which enables users to assess mental toughness before and after a programme of interventions. There is also a version of MTQ48 available for use with secondary school and university students. 1 © AQR International 2016

Can we develop Mental Toughness in individuals? Instinctively the answer is “we can”. Sports psychologists and sports coaches would argue that they have been doing this for many years with significant evidence of success. More practically, the answer still appears to be “yes we can”. One key question is “are we changing someone’s mental toughness? Or can we simply equip someone with tools and techniques that enable them to behave as a mentally tough person might behave?” The answer appears to be that, where the individual wants to change or develop, it is possible to change one’s core mental toughness. We are not suggesting that anyone must develop their mental toughness. For those who see a benefit in their life or their work, there may be a good reason for developing mental toughness without necessarily becoming very mentally tough. There does seem to be some valuable advantages in life and work for those who are more mentally tough than most. The value of the model and the MTQ48 measure is that it can help to identify which aspects of one’s mental toughness are preventing or hindering them from attaining wellbeing or leading a more positive life. Self-awareness is the key here. How does the toolkit work? There are two approaches to organising the exercises. One is to focus on the desired outcome – “I wish to improve my Mental Toughness in terms of the 4 Cs”. The others is to approach it from the perspective of “enablers”. These fall into six broad headings:  Positive Thinking – Affirmations, Thought Stopping, Self Talk, etc.  Visualisation – Guided Imaging, etc.  Anxiety Control – Controlled Breathing, Relaxation, Distraction, etc.  Attentional Control – Dealing with Interruptions, Attention Span, etc.  Goal Setting – SMART Goals, “Eating the Elephant”, Balancing Goals, etc.  The MTQ48 test –Good feedback and reflection often provokes a positive response These all help to develop the capability to deal with stress, pressure and challenge and, where appropriate, to cope with these. The exercises in this toolkit are organised by the 4 Cs. Many of these can impact on more than one of the 4 Cs. The tools have been written so that they can be delivered to a group or coaching tools to be used in a one-to-one situation. 2 © AQR International 2016

Using the Exercises The start point should be an accurate and realistic assessment of the individual’s Mental Toughness and their potential development needs ideally based on the use of the MTQ48 measure. This enables the user to direct interventions appropriately. One useful indicator to examine is an individual’s challenge scores. Individuals who are mentally sensitive on this scale (typically scores of 1 – 3 perhaps 4) are less open to learning than individuals with higher levels of Mental Toughness. They may require more attention. Mental Toughness is developed as a result of experiential learning  Mental Toughness is learned – it is not easily taught. It is about developing a mindset. One can’t learn this just because you follow a process.  For the Individual– they may need to be supported to persevere until they “get it”. Practice is important.  For the Coach/Tutor – facilitation and coaching skills are important. Trialling and practising these skills is important. There is nevertheless an underlying process: Stage one - Experience Introduce the exercise to the individual and explain its purpose. Participants carry out the exercise and assess what difference it makes to their thinking Stage two - Reflection The absolute key to success. Get individuals to consider:  What occurred? – What difference was made? – Did they improve performance in some way – was this beneficial?  How did they feel? Was mood improved, did it boost confidence? Was it enjoyable? Did it make them want to do more? The key is to enable the individual to associate this feeling with their participation in the exercise.  What did they learn? Can doing things differently be effective? Does approaching things differently work? Does being positive produces surprising results? What could they now do that they didn’t think they could before? Where could they now apply this learning to other areas which are important? – especially at work! 3 © AQR International 2016

Stage three - Purposeful Practice Now the hard bit. Practice what you have learned until it becomes a habit. Then it becomes easier and the benefits will flow. Coaches’ Guidance Prior to running a Mental Toughness Development, we suggest that all participants are tested with MTQ48. Testing or training as MTQ48 practitioners can be arranged through AQR. Ongoing use of the measure is delivered via an online assessment platform with a metering system. Pricing for training and meters are available on request. As part of the preparation for a Mental Toughness development session, the MTQ48 Development Report should be printed in respect of each delegate. Please examine the results of each individual carefully prior to the programme. People with low scores across each of the scales may need some 1:1 support and including them in a programme of this nature could have a detrimental effect on them. This needs to be considered in the context of the group. For example, for a person falling in a mentally sensitive band (1-3) where all other people in that particular cohort are high (7-10s), to work as a whole group would be discouraged. This is designed to be a flexible toolkit of exercises which can be adapted or applied in a variety of ways. There are two sets of cue cards available in the pack. The coaching cards have been designed for use in one-to-one coaching sessions. The group cue cards have been designed for use by coaching staff when working with a group of individuals. Many of the exercises can be run several times in slightly different ways, enabling the content to focus on a specific outcome. 4 © AQR International 2016

Each exercise is supported with a cue card which provides full instructions for use, equipment required and guidance for managing reflection and learning. Support resources and equipment requirements are listed on each cue card. There is a UCanPass group Power Point presentation to introduce the mental toughness model, as well as a UCanPass workbook that can be given to individuals as home based learning included within the resources. 5 © AQR International 2016

Index Coaching Control 1. Procrastination 2. Think Three Positives 3. Making a Fist 4. The Scent of a Lemon 5. Progressive Muscular Relaxation Exercise 6. What is my Goal 7. GANTT Chart 8. Managing My Time 9. What Will I Achieve 10. Positive Thinking Planner 11. What Will I do tomorrow Confidence 12. Posing for Success 13. 3 Step Self Belief Builder 14. Confidence Booster 15. Do Something Nice for Yourself 16. Self Confidence Stimulator 17. Recognising Your Blockers 18. What do you think I am good at 19. Flaw Fixer Commitment 20. The Scent of a Lemon 21. Number Grid 22. Colour Changing Card Trick 23. Take Nine Breaths 24. How do you eat an Elephant © AQR International 2016

Index 25. Memory Card Games 26. Turning Ants into Pets Challenge 27. Affirmations 28. Heroes and Heroines 29. Thermometer 30. Not to do List Group Activities Control. 1. Procrastination 2. What is my Goal 3. Making a Fist 4. US Basketball Exercise 5. The Scent of a Lemon 6. Progressive Muscular Relaxation Exercise 7. Breathing and Calming 8. Sarnoff Squeeze 9. GANTT Chart 10. 5 x 30 11. Stroop Exercise 12. Ear Tapping 13. Think Three Positives 14. Managing Time 15. Feeling after achievement © AQR International 2016

Index Commitment 16. Number Grid 17. Target Practice 18. Memory Card Games 19. Pick a Card 20. The Scent of a Lemon 21. Colour Changing Card Trick 22. How do you eat an Elephant 23. Stroop Exercise 24. Turning Ants into Pets 25. Take Nine Breaths Confidence 26. Airwaves 27. Posing for Success 28. Compliments Game 29. 3 Step Self-Belief Builder 30. Confidence Booster 31. Do something nice for Yourself 32. Recognising Your Blockers Challenge 33. Airwaves 34. Stork Stand 35. Affirmations 36. Thermometer 37. Not to do List © AQR International 2016

SAMPLE COACHING ACTIVITES www.aqrinternational.co.uk

MAKING A FIST A Short Relaxation/Anxiety Control Exercise Running the exercise – 1. The individual can do this standing up or sitting down. 2. Explain that they will do an exercise where they will be shown a quick and easy way of releasing tension. When anxious, the body reacts by tightening muscles or disrupting breathing. Bringing one or the other under control helps to release the tension. 3. Explain that: You do this exercise on your own. Sit comfortably with a straight back. Tell yourself that you are going to relax. Slow your breathing and allow a few moments to let muscles relax. With your arms down by your side, make a tight fist with your right hand. You should feel your arm muscles tighten. Hold it for 10 seconds. Release the fist and feel the tension drain away (wait for 15 seconds). Repeat this with your left hand, making a fist and holding it for 10 seconds. Release the fist and feel the tension drain away (wait for 15 seconds). Repeat the sequence 4 times. Coach/Advisor Review Ask the individual to describe how they feel. Can they feel the tension draining away from their muscles? Do they feel more positive? Remind them that this is a quick and easy exercise that they should practice whenever they can – at home, before sports or challenging activity, etc. An Option (as a second phase): You can extend this exercise to include the upper arm. Make a fist with your right hand and raise your right forearm slowly up to your shoulder to make a muscle”. Hold for 10 seconds. Bring the forearm back down slowly and release the fist. Relax for 15 seconds. Make a fist with your left hand and raise your left forearm slowly up to your shoulder to “make a muscle”. Hold for 10 seconds. Bring the forearm back down slowly and release the fist. Relax for 15 seconds. © AQR International 2016

MAKING A FIST Background One of the body’s responses to fear, anxiety and pressure is muscle tension and/or disrupted or faster breathing. This is a result of the “fight or flight response” humans developed thousands of years ago when dealing with threats from sabre toothed tigers and the like. Unfortunately we still respond like this even to imagined threats. It heightens our sense of “anxiety” and can help to create those “panic moments” – this impacts on our confidence, our sense of control, our response to challenge and our determination or commitment to deliver. Controlled breathing is especially important – most people only use 20% of their breathing capacity – a good and balanced supply of oxygen to the body is important for relaxation as well as response to activity. Discussion Guides:  How did the individual feel before and after the exercise? (An option is to ask the individual’s score anxiety on a scale of 1 – 10 before and after the exercise).  If they feel the benefit, will they practice this regularly? Practice does make perfect.  Did they feel more positive after the exercise? Support Materials & Resources No special materials needed. © AQR International 2016

TAKE NINE BREATHS A Concentration Exercise - This can be used at the start or end of a one to one session. A very simple short breathing exercise, which research has shown is enough to refocus the minds of highly distracted people. It works especially well with multitaskers – those who read, watch television and use their phone at the same time. Running the exercise The mindfulness task simply involves counting groups of nine breaths: nine inhales and nine exhales. Tell the individual: I want you to do something simple and straightforward. Sitting at your desk, I want you to inhale slowly and exhale slowly nine times - whilst counting down in your head the number of times you breathe. Coach/Advisor Review: Research by two psychologists – Gorman and Green - has shown that deep focus on a single thing, and that single thing is not actually very demanding of your attention, can improve concentration significantly. No one can stay focused on it indefinitely – hence only 9 breaths. The beneficial effects aren’t long lasting, as they didn’t carry over across days but they are effective for an important meeting or a training day. Ask the individual how they feel after the exercise – has it cleared their heads? Observe whether their attention has improved. Support Materials & Resources None needed © AQR International 2016

Recognising Your Blockers A Confidence Building Exercise - which shows the importance of overcoming barriers. Running the exercise – An exercise which typically takes around 10-15 minutes to complete. A blocker is a psychological barrier that prevents you from working. Blockers can be in the form of behaviour, thought patterns or habits. It is important that we recognise, acknowledge and breakdown these blockers. There are four phases to identifying signs of blockers. Explain that: You are going to identify barriers that prevent you from working. 1. Initial lack of motivation The feeling that you don’t want to complete a piece of work. 2. Bypassing Conscience Most people will feel guilty when they put off completing a piece of work. But sometimes we can bypass that conscience by purposely re-thinking the situation to make us feel better. For example:  I have worked very hard. I deserve a break. 3. Creating an Opportunity There needs to something nearby that can distract you. We often work near others, next to our phones or with the TV on. You are subconsciously looking for a distraction. 4. Getting away with it If you feel you have gotten away with it then the thought pattern will continue. © AQR International 2016

Recognising Your Blockers Coach/ Advisor Review Ask individuals about the blockers they have identified. How does that make them feel? How can they change their thought patterns? How can they overcome and eliminate the blockers? How does that make them feel? What can they achieve if they overcome those blockers? Background This is an exercise which will help individuals to improve their outlook, to show them how to optimise their time, reduce distractions and show them what they can achieve. Support Materials & Resources Paper and Pencil © AQR International 2016

Not To Do List Running the exercise – this is an exercise which can be completed on a monthly basis as part of a coaching session with an individual, or on their own. The aim is for the individual to identify things that slow them down or distract them from achieving their true goals. Once the individual can identify the things getting in their way, they should feel more capable, and more in control of achieving their goals (as well as more confident in doing so). Firstly, get the individual to write down their Desired Goal. For example this could be; to get an interview for a promotion, be less stressed etc. Explain to the individual that the aim here is for them to identify the things NOT TO DO. The individual should think about a typical day in their life staring from the beginning of the day, working towards the end of the day, and considering the day to be in segments (morning, lunchtime, afternoon, evening). The individual should then identify different distractors for each segment of the day. The more specific the better. Examples of distractors might be: checking their social media, replying to texts, checking their emails. Background There are usually activities in everyone’s life which distract or stop us from achieving our goals. In order to stop this, it is important not only to identify these distractors, but also to take action and do something else instead. By doing so, we can regain control over our goals and enhance our ability to achieve these goals. © AQR International 2016

Not To Do List Desired Goal: Distraction (be Impact My NOT TO DO I will instead specific) LIST. I will stop... Example: I keep Example: I lose Example: Stop Example: Turn off stopping my work to focus on my work, checking the sports my phone. check the sports scores and end up taking scores Schedule a specific much longer than time when I can necessary to check the sports complete a piece of scores, eg. Every 2 work. hours for 10 minutes. © AQR International 2016

SAMPLE GROUP ACTIVITES www.aqrinternational.co.uk

US Basketball Exercise A Positive Thinking and Concentration Exercise Running the exercise – no materials are required Coach/Advisor shares objectives and why we are doing this. 1. Ask individuals to pair up and face each other. You will play a competitive game with each other but first you need to learn how to play the game. 2. Do a couple of practice runs. Firstly, stand with hands behind your backs. Then bring your hands up in front of yourselves with the palms of your hands facing away from you (at around chest height) and with your palms facing the other person’s palms so that all four hands are comfortably in sight of both of you. First time around many will do this slowly and hesitantly. Repeat the practice run but exhort them to do it much more quickly. 3. When ready, say: You are going to compete with each other over 5 rounds. Only now when you bring your hands up, you choose how many fingers and thumbs you will show. You do this whilst your hands are behind your back. The winner is the one who counts all the fingers (and thumbs) on all four hands in front of them and who is the first to shout out the correct answer. 4. Announce each of the rounds by counting down 3-2-1-Go! 5. Take everyone through the first 4 rounds. A really good buzz develops. Concentration develops over the 4 rounds. Most take it seriously and enjoy it. Some ‘cheating’ might emerge. Some may delay bringing their hands up which gives them a slight advantage. Some always show 8 - 10 fingers and thumbs – knowing that the other will have to count them all whilst they may only have to count a few on their opponents hand. It’s not important and best treated lightly. 6. After the fourth round, check generally to see if there are any clear leaders who are winning 3-1 or even 4-0. Now announce: There is change in the rules - for the final round, the slate is wiped clean and this is now “winner take all”. You will now get groans and some might complain “it’s not fair”. If so respond firmly that “life’s not fair” and “get over it”. You make the rules anyway. 7. Run the fifth round. Congratulate winners, commiserate with the losers. © AQR International 2016

US Basketball Exercise Background and Objectives for the Sessions: This is an exercise used by the US basketball team (who rarely lose) to teach players to focus and to concentrate. It works remarkably well. The sudden change in rules is designed to show people how to deal with setbacks. Some will be thrown whereas others seize the opportunity and take it in their stride. It is an experiential exercise which requires structured reflection to enable them to extract learning to build a sense of control and understand how to concentrate. Discussion Guides:  Did everyone enjoy doing this?  What did they think was the key to success in this exercise? – They should point to concentration and focus and not letting the change in rules upset them.  How did they feel when you changed the rules before the last round? How did those ahead feel and how did those who were behind feel? What did it do to their mindset – were they more or less determined to win? Those who were behind should talk about how their mindset changed from feeling they were losing to feeling they were in with a chance. The trick is to do this in the head at any time. They can do that at any time simply by imagining everything is still possible when things go badly.  What did they do to improve focus as the exercise progressed? Can they do this elsewhere – like work projects, preparing presentations, home tasks, etc?  Why do they think this might help performance, wellbeing and behaviour? Finally, a useful message here is that even a world beating team like the US Basketball Team (which pretty much wins all of the time) practices concentration and dealing with setbacks because it is so important to success. © AQR International 2016

“Memory Card Game” Concentration Exercise Running the exercise – Memory Card Games require attentional control - concentration and focus – for mastery. Online Memory Card Games can be found of various websites, for example: http://www.web-games-online.com/memory/ Memory games such as this exercise the brain, making it more sharp and alert, enhancing the ability to concentrate. 1. Instruct the individuals to play a memory card game online for 10-20 minutes each day. 2. Ask the individuals to keep a log of how long it took them to complete each game. Over time, the participants’ concentration and focusing ability should improve, and their score times should therefore decrease. 3. During the next session, ask the individuals if there are any strategies they were using to try to improve their score? 4. What was challenging for them in the beginning? Scores during the Memory Card Game will improve if the participants can concentrate and learn to concentrate, not just for this game, but for every time they need to concentrate – at work, interview prep, report writing, etc. The important thing is that we can all learn to improve our concentration, which helps us to do many things better. Coach/Advisor Review The essence of this exercise is to get individuals to reflect on what they are doing – can they focus? Can they shut out distractions? How do they focus with more intensity (which does develop)? When does this ability matter? (For work, reading, writing and listening, etc.) Will it make life easier or better if they can master the ability to focus - which they all should be able to do? When would the ability to focus help them? Are there times and situations where they know they can focus – Watching a favourite sports team, socialising etc? What can they learn from that? It can be useful to run a follow up session after a few weeks. This exercise works well with other Concentration exercises in this series. © AQR International 2016

“Memory Card Game” Concentration Exercise Encourage individuals to:  Reflect on what they have done and what they have learned.  Identify what they can do to improve concentration.  Think how they can apply this to work, career development, home life etc. Reflection will usually produce a crop of answers around three themes: 1. Techniques – this is often to do with organising themselves. 2. Setting goals and targets and steadily working towards them. 3. Concentrating and blocking out distractions. Background: This is an exercise which is engaging and illustrates the value of repeated practice as well as concentration. It has the advantage of a built-in scoring mechanism (time to complete the game) which enables progression to be assessed. Studies show that it is possible to improve attention span from an (UK) average of 8 minutes to 45+ minutes, not only enabling individuals to be more productive, but also to take the stress out of such activities. Support Materials & Resources: A computer and notepad to track progress. © AQR International 2016

Stork Stand Exercise Running the exercise – a good icebreaker which demonstrates how to “empty the mind” and the benefit of so doing. An exercise which is widely used in sports applications and in martial arts and meditation training. For most, this is a challenge which they need to master by learning from repeated practice and failure. Explain that: You need to find a spot away from chairs and other hazardous objects. Begin by standing on both feet but putting all your weight on one leg. Place your arms outstretched and gradually raise your free leg. Keep that leg just off the ground. Close your eyes and try to maintain your balance. Then raise the leg to touch the knee How long can you keep this up? (Let’s see who can do it for the longest). Repeat for the other leg Now repeat with the instruction to “empty the mind”. One way of doing this is to pair people up and get them to have a conversation with each other and stop thinking about the exercise. By concentrating on the discussion most will find they will achieve longer stork stands. Another is to open a book and read it. © AQR International 2016

Stork Stand Exercise Coach/Advisor Review Model scores are shown below. Encourage participants to: Reflect on what they have done and what they have learned about being able to “empty the mind” and achieve a task which is challenging. Identify what they can do to improve concentration. Think how they can apply this to work, high pressure tasks, etc. Background: This is an exercise widely used for balance training in sports. Increasing balance does not only enhance physical performance, but it is also thought to contribute to improved psychological and emotional states through the building of self-efficacy (life control and confidence in abilities). Support Materials & Resources None Rating Score (seconds) Excellent > 50 Good 40 - 50 Average 25- 39 Fair 10 - 24 Poor <10 © AQR International 2016

“3 STEP Self-Belief Builder!” Self-efficacy refers to one's belief in one's ability to succeed in specific situations or accomplish a task. One's sense of self-efficacy can play a major role in how one approaches goals, tasks, and challenges. There are 3 activities we can do to develop our self-efficacy, which will build our mental toughness across all of the 4Cs – control, commitment, challenge and confidence. These 3 activities include: 1. Performance Appraisals 2. Vicarious Experience 3. Constructive Feedback This activity can be completed in around 20 minutes over a series of sessions. Stage 1: Performance Appraisals Ask the participants to write down 5-10 examples of accomplishments they are proud of. This could be a good appraisal, being nominated for something etc. Then ask the individual to write down 5-10 examples of times when they failed to deal with a task or challenge, or did not do as well as they expected. 1. Review both lists with the individuals and ask them consider the reasons why certain times they achieved their goals, vs other times when they did not. 2. What they could have done to have had a more positive outcome? Background: The experience of mastery influences your perspective on your abilities. Discussing successful experiences lead to greater feelings of self-efficacy. However, failing to deal with a task or challenge can also undermine and weaken self-efficacy, so it is important to reflect and discuss times of failure, and what can be learned from this. Stage 2: Vicarious Experience/Modelling Think of someone in your life who you find inspirational or would consider successful in their life, a friend, colleague, mentor etc. If possible, they should ask them specifically what their ‘strategies of success’ are, what advice do they have for achieving certain goals? Can they think of specific examples in their life? 1. Ask the individuals to write down these ‘success strategies’ in a way they understand. 2. Review this list with the individuals during the next session, considering; are these techniques they could use themselves? Why do they think they enhance the chances of success? © AQR International 2016

“3 STEP Self-Belief Builder!” Background: Hearing how someone else performed a task or handled a situation can help you to perform a similar task or handle a similar task by imitation, and if they succeed in performing a task, you are likely to think that you will succeed as well, if the task is not too difficult. Hearing how other people succeed will increase your beliefs that you can master a similar activity, by modelling their behaviours. Stage 3: Verbal Persuasion/Constructive Feedback Ask individuals to think and then write down a list of any positive feedback they can find written down or remember regarding their performance on tasks. This could be positive feedback on an assignment, verbal feedback regarding their performance that they were given by someone they worked with, a reference letter from a job or internship they did etc. Background: When other people encourage and provide positive feedback on task performance, you tend to believe that you are more capable of performing other similar tasks. Constructive feedback is important in maintaining a sense of efficacy as it may help overcome self-doubt The participants will now have 3 pages or so of self-belief building material in the form of: 1. Performance Appraisals 2. Vicarious Experience 3. Constructive Feedback They can review these materials on a weekly basis and add to it when possible. Coach/Advisor Review How do they feel reviewing the information? Do they feel they can implement some of the success strategies in their life? Do they feel more confident in achieving their goals? How interesting was it to hear other people’s success strategies? Support Materials & Resources Paper and Pencil © AQR International 2016

The full version has over 60 group and coaching activities to help you develop Mental Toughness. Please call or email us to order yours today. www.aqrinternational.co.uk