CHAPTER 3: A WHOLE LOT OF DOUGH ‘I think you should start with a third, perhaps, like I mentioned on the plane. I mean, you could end up being the size of Two-Quarters! Now her – how shall I say it, ‘back-quarter’ – is really a back-half… if you know what I mean,’ remarked Three-Fifths while looking at Two- Fifths, who in turn was gazing intently at the whole of the cakes. ‘It’s also not half price either. It’s a whole lot of dough (money).’ ‘I’ve never eaten any less than a whole,’ mentioned 66 quietly – out of earshot of 88 – to Two- Fifths, who had now sneaked away from Three-Fifths and was walking around taking a look at all the scrumptious treats. ‘It’s not worth eating just a fraction of a whole. If you’re going to do it then do it right and eat it all, I say – hook, line, and whatever the other bit is called. In other words, don’t mess around and don’t play games with it; just stick all of it in your 43
THE NUMBERS: A FRACTION OF THEIR POTENTIAL! cake-whole and gulp this bad boy down! It’s worth every penny.’ 66 picked up one of the delicious new organic, dairy-free doughs – a whole one, of course. ‘This will make your toes tingle,’ he said with a grin. Two-Fifths glanced over his shoulder to see that the coast was clear – Three-Fifths was within a crowd of other fractions, looking at a tiny morsel of vanilla sponge cake. ‘OK, I will,’ he agreed, taking the whole dough in his hand, ‘I’m going to eat the whole thing! Not half of it, but the whole lot of dough. I’ve worked a fifth of what I was capable of at work, so I’m going to treat myself. I’m going to eat this whole thing hook, line, and whatever that other bit is called!’ With that he prized the (raspberry) dough into his mouth, forcing the edges in with his stubby little fingers. Within an instant his eyes crossed as his mouth filled with chewy- gooey, raspberry- filled dough. 44
CHAPTER 3: A WHOLE LOT OF DOUGH However, as he bit down, the pressure – both on him to swallow, as well as on the dough inside his mouth – proved a little too much; jam filling shot out the corners of his mouth like raspberry pellets, hitting 66 right on his forehead. Just like Two-Fifths’, 66’s eyes also rolled across his face before his focus turned to the sweet and sticky jam that was now trickling and glooping down his nose and onto the top of his mouth, making his lips tremble with delight. His tongue suddenly appeared, briskly spinning around his lips, the jam all gone before 88 could even bat an eyelid. 45
THE NUMBERS: A FRACTION OF THEIR POTENTIAL! ‘Hmm, not bad,’ he said with a smile as Two-Fifths, now partially sweating, managed to swallow – with quite a few efforts – what was left of the tasty treat. Upon hearing this almighty gulp, both 88 and Three-Fifths turned around (along with a number of other customers). ‘Hmm… are you OK there, Two-Fifths?’ Three- Fifths asked suspiciously, while 66 secretly took out his phone to take a photo of the first fraction who had devoured a whole dough (with the exception of a few drops of jam). ‘Err, just saying hello to 66,’ replied Two-Fifths, wiping the perspiration from his brow. 66 lifted the camera to improve the angle, before taking a quick selfie of them both. It was instantly posted on the net, along with the caption: The first dough – whole – in the cake-hole. Suddenly, an orchestra of ‘pings!’ was heard around the shop. 46
CHAPTER 3: A WHOLE LOT OF DOUGH 88 put her hand in her apron pocket and lifted out her phone, seeing the new notification that had just come through. ‘Oh interesting, 66,’ 88 said, reacting in her usual tone. ‘I think I have a few more washing-up jobs for you to do in addition to the half-job you did before,’ she added with a grin, looking at his post. ‘You still owe me from the time you bought that Phone 99, remember? Hmm.’ ‘Gulp!’ was 66’s response. 47
THE NUMBERS: A FRACTION OF THEIR POTENTIAL! 48
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