Apr_May_2018_Newsletter

N e w s l e t t e rSalt River Valley Al-Anon Information ServiceApril / May 2018 Dist. 2b. 8. 9. 13. 14. 15. 17. 18 Vol.4 Issue 7Salt River Valley Al-Anon Elephant in the Room Today I know that alcoholism truly Information Service is a family disease. (SRVAIS) By Jeanine G., Louisiana OFFICERS Many years ago, a friend of mine Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al- went to dinner with my husband and Anon Family Group Hdqts., Inc., VirginiaChair: Dufy L. me. As we walked to our car after- Beach, VAVice Chair: Tom N. ward, she asked me “Does he alwaysSecretary: Dee D. drink like that?” I said with a plastered I Awakened to MyTreasurer: John N. smile and fake, casual voice, “Oh, no, Own LifeVice-Treasurer: Larry S. he just drinks socially.” I was sad, an-Member-at-Large: Nick gry and embarrassed, but I also wasMember-at-Large: Tracy living in denial about his alcoholism. COORDINATORS She encouraged me to try Al-Anon, to I always felt that I was a loving per- which I responded, “Why should I go son, but I often lived life by react- to Al-Anon? He is the one with the ing, instead of responding. problem.” That was all I was willing to I wondered why I could not change admit. She briefly explained what Al- the alcoholic, so I tried harder. I Anon is, but she did not mention why made sure that the house was I might qualify for it. That was the ele- clean and that the meals were phant in the room. good and on time.Technology / POS: John N. A couple of years later, on a Thurs- I made sure to look my best whenMeeting List: John W. day night, all my rage and frustration we went out together. I becameNewsletter Editor: Patrick G. of feeling helpless about his drinking obsessed with trying to meet theVolunteer: Tom C. rose up in me and exploded like a needs of others. For a few years, IAfter-Hours: Balvina. volcano. I was a madwoman, felt needed and appreciated, but ISRVAIS Liaison: (open) screeching and cursing him. I told him lost someone along the way—Alateen Liaison: Claude O. that I wished he would die and I myself.Literature Supply: John W. wished I would die, too, because I The Al-Anon program became myPublic Outreach: Claude O. couldn’t live in my own skin anymore. journey of discovery. A friend onceSpanish Liaison: (open) I recall that incident like an out of asked me what I liked to do. EveryFacebook: Stephanie B. body experience. timeWebmaster: Ruth D. I thought, how could that woman be I thought of something, I realized me? The next day, I gathered the that my spouse liked to do it, and I Office Location courage to attend my first Al-Anon had learned to like it. I began to meeting. What a gift…what a miracle. wonder who I really was and what 2432 W. Peoria Ave. #1027 It had never occurred to me that I was made me happy. I began to wonder Phoenix, Az 85029 powerless over alcohol. That first if I could find that happy person 602.249.1257 meeting had a profound and lasting that was once a part of me. www.srvais.org effect on me. Meanwhile, my husband was morti- INSIDE: fied that I had gone to a meeting be- cause he was afraid that now every- Pg. 2 - 4 Al-Anon one would know that he was an alco- Pg. 5 - Alateen holic. We both believed he hid his Pg. 6 - 9 Flyer s drinking from the eyes of the public.www.srvais.org April / May 2018 p.1

Salt River Valley Al-Anon Information ServiceCont. pg. 1 shelves with Literature that is in Side note: I myself the Newslet-I started by performing my daily high demand. ter Editor went to the Appreciationtasks for my own pleasure. Luncheon, had a good time.For example, I would clean my We now have a new Board, partly Thank you Dufy and Everyone.house because I liked it clean, not anyway. We decided to staggerbecause I wanted someone else the Board so as not to have the District 14to notice. I cooked a meal be- whole Board change at one time.cause I wanted to enjoy it. Garth reported that the Valentine’sI went to work because I liked do- Because of this, we are in the pro- fundraiser had approximately 50ing what I did. I awakened to my cess of changing the By-laws to attendee’s. He said attendance isown life and today, I accept that I reflect that only a few positions low at his district meeting.am magnificent just because I am each year will alternate. It was There is an Alateen meeting thathere. voted that we believe the transi- will close in April due to very low tion will be in the best interest of or no attendance. By Rosemarie B., Alberta SRVAIS. Our new is secretary DeeD.Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al- District 15Anon Family Group Hdqts., Inc., Virginia We also have two new Members-Beach, VA at-Large, Nick and Tracy. Thanks to Charlotte reported that District’s all for stepping up to service. Tom speaker panel on Public Outreach STEPPING DOWN N. took over the position of Vice took place on March 10th. There Chair. A special thanks to Tom! He were 3 wonderful speakers whoDufy will be stepping down from fills every request our chair asks shared their experience, strength,her chair role position in Novem- for! and hope.ber 2018. They spoke to what service is, Our treasurer, John N., does a fan- how to get involved and how it aid 2019 CONVENTION tastic job keeping us balanced and recovery. Charlotte welcomed vol- in the know. Filing our taxes on unteers to join her district as theyDufy will be volunteering to chair time, donating money to the arms plan future events.and Ruth will be co-charing the of Al-Anon and basically keeping us Note: District 15 Planning Meet-2019 Al-Anon Convention. Con- solvent ing is June 16, 2018 11:00amgratulations! RVAIS Office. ALWAYS! Thank you John and yourDufy’s Report on AWSC Vice Treasurer, Larry S.! All in all, Coordinator ReportMeeting in Yuma we are grateful for a fine running machine. Thanks to all our Volun- Tom said that the volunteers are SRVAIS is alive and running smooth- teers! doing an excellent job coveragely. We took inventory on December is complete. With the exception of31st and al things considered, bal- We are having our Appreciation 2 half days this month. Tom re-anced out well. Luncheon on March 10th at my ported that he is stepping back aWe have decided to downsize our house. Potluck, Fun and friend- bit from serviceinventory of SpanishL iterature, as ship!we have very little request for it. Keep it simpleWe instead, intend to fill thosewww.srvais.org April / May 2018 p.2

Salt River Valley Al-Anon Information ServicePublic Outreach Report Article VI-Duties of the Offic- the additional revisions suggested by ers. Remove the office manager the attendees.Claude O. Reported that District9 sponsored the Mohave school role. Natalie said she thought that The motion was seconded by Janet.district health fair. He stated that the By-Laws had already been vot- The motion passed unanimously. Deehis doctor has recommended he ed on. Dufy said that to avoid hav- was asked to prepare a clean red-slow down his extensive public ing the entire board vacate at the lined version of the revisions for theoutreach endeavers. He will now same time, the Board revised the- next GR meetingonly have time to work directly verbiage to stagger the board elec-with the districts. tions. Garth asked how often the ExecutiveOne of his efforts is to spearhead Board meets. Dufy replied that thean Alateen public outreach by This would allow for smoother board meets on the first Tuesday ofsending reps to the Districts and transition and may encourage oth- every month at 6:00 p.m. for oneasking GRs to reachout to guid- ers to step up and serve on the hour at the SRVAIS office.ance counselors at area school. board if they know someone willHe said he is getting some help be there to help guide them. Garth noted that under Article V-from District 8. He reported that at Officers, Item 3 that the quorumDelegates Day there was a Na- As the additional revisions suggest- number is at 7 should be 4.tive American public outreach an- ed by the attendees. Janet asked ifnouncement made. there would always be a Vice- Garth noted that under Article VI- Treasurer. Larry, Vice-Treasurer Duties of the Officers, Treasurer/Vice By Law Revisions stated that yes, there would be -Treasure, Item 5 refers to the Office because the duties have expand- Manager and suggested that this en-Article V-Officers, Item 4. Re- ed. tire item be removed from the By- Laws.move the verbiage “every (2'.) years It is beneficial to have 2 membersand cannot exceed (4) consecutive share in the financial duties that A motion was made by Meryl to ac-years on the Executive Committee.” include tax filings, bank reconcilia- cept the revisions suggested by the tions, POS system training for vol- Board as well as the additional revi-Replace that Verbiage with “In an unteers, bank runs, billing paying sions suggested by the attendees.effort to stagger the roles on the and other responsibilities.board, the positions of Chair, Treas- The motion was seconded by as theurer, Vice-Treasure and a Member- Charlotte questioned if in the fu- additional revisions suggested by theat-Large will be elected in year one. ture the office would want to hire attendees. The motion was seconded an office manager. Dufy stated by Janet. The motion passed unani-The positions of Vice-Chair, Secre- that the cost to maintain not only mously. Dee was asked to prepare atary and a Member-at-Large will be the salary, but paid time off, health clean red-lined version of the revi-elected the following year. Each po- benefits and other costs is not sions for the next GR meeting.sition is for two years and cannot something the SRVAIS has histori-exceed four consecutive years on cally be able to fund.the Executive Committee. “ Currently, the office has beenArticle V-Officers, Item 1. Re- without an office manager for 2 years. The board and volunteersvise to 2 members at large and in- have picked up the responsibilitiesclude the Vice-Treasurer role. within their particular expertise.aswww.srvais.org April / May 2018 p.3

Salt River Valley Al-Anon Information ServiceEvent Announcements Hold a Meeting PHONE BRIDGE at SRVAIS OfficeJanet reported that the Crossroads For a list of WSO regis-Al-Anon meeting April 2nd 2018 tered phone meetings.will have a new location. Contact: [email protected] Call to check times and can bringThe new location is Our Savior’s food, just discard when done. GR1 FormLutheran Church on 1212 EastGlendale Ave, Phoenix. ( on the Thank you Meeting changes and new meet- ings. Can find form onNE corner of Glendale Ave and Contact: SRVAIS Office12th Street). 602.249.1257 srvais.org website.Coordinator Report Donation Form Groups use when sending in dona- After—Hours Calls tions to SRVAIS Office so you willTom said that the volunteers are get credit for it.doing an excellent job coverage Have all shifts covered. 95% ofis complete. With the exception of2 half days this month. Tom report- Face Book callers are looking for a meetinged that he is stepping back a bit location. Calls can be forwarded to either a home phone or a cellfrom service and is training Gil to You can find us on FaceBook! Yes, phone. Contact: Balvina atmanage the coordination of the all you techies out there, we too, are ( 480) 321-9570 if you are inter-volunteers. in the modern age! Thank you to ested in serving in this position.Those in attendance thanked Tom Stephanie for making this happen!with around of applause and Here is the address to type in when on facebook: Salt River Valley Al-gave a warm welcome to Gil. Anon Information Service Volunteer at SRVAIS Of- Literature Reminder fice If you are interested in being Literature pre-ordering is available apart of our team, volunteering & greatly reduces the time to pro- just 4 hours a month. Please call cess your sales before the GR Tom or Gil at SRVAIS 602-249- meeting. 1257. They will set up a training session for you. Al-Anon Story’s Wel- Al-Anon Information comed Submit group updates, flyers Keep it to around 300 words, thank and Al-Anon information to you.Submit : newslet- [email protected] Plus [email protected] send flyers to : SRVAIS Office to be posted on website.Serenity Prayer God grant me the serenity to ac- Thank You To Everyone for cept the things I cannot change, your Service! No Matter howthe courage to change the things I big or small all important, can and the wisdom to know the Thank you! differencewww.srvais.org April / May 2018 p.4

ChatAlateen It Doesn’t Make it So All Alateen’s this page is for you , send me Before Alateen, I could never forgive the some of your programpeople who hurt me. I could hold grudges stories for your fellowlike I could hold a feather—easily. Resent- Alateen members toment is a bad habit I couldn’t seem to read. Just keep itbreak. If you hurt me, I was going to hurt around 100 to 150you back—ten times worse. No one knew words. My Email is:that on the inside I was hurting. I played it [email protected] like everything was ok. If you even said Any ? Let me know.the slightest thing wrong or even looked atme wrong, I was coming after you. Thank you. But when I started working my program Patrick G. Newsletter editor.in Alateen, I learned that it’s ok to forgivesomeone if they hurt me. I have learned toforgive my dad for his drinking. I alwaysused to beat myself up about the stupidstuff I did to myself, but I have forgivenmyself for the pain I caused to myself andharm to my body. I feel so much betterknowing that it’s okay to forgive. I’velearned that if people hurt me, they hurtme. They only effect my mood if I let them.Before, their opinions would convince methat’s how I was. But today, I know that it’stheir opinion, and it doesn’t make it true. By Paige M.Reprinted with permission of the Forum, Al-Anon FamilyGroup Headquarteds., Inc., Virginia Beach,VAwww.srvais.org April/ May 2018 p.5