BOYGIRL BABBLES: ISSUE #01: HOMCOMING

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hello, welcome to the boygirl babbles zine! my name is ienna and here are some of my very queer emotions spilled out 0n these pages foryou to read. i hope you enjoy:)

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.JF* arltl*$*tet{ rt.r .G Cf\\r ,.\"5,G call it a night {'-. qil:\\ i can still smell your mom's detergent on my sheets. Td9.} we laid in my bed after class and you wrapped 4Tf your arms around mywaist as you gently snored. .tG' , oon', know if this is what friends do. ?'i nD .t\\ think i get weak at thought of you thinking of me. but i don't really knowwhy .lG because i can't Or _rqit*- /G -{{'\\ J€ o'r{ilI\\ it happened again on that night. we laid there when i was in a \"t-C: , pretty dress that i hated and you were in your dad's old suit that didn't fit you. i locked my eyes and threw away the key /G +G-,when i felt you staring at me. i knew then if i glanced at you for .Ib _-.tr-a second, you might kiss me. i should want to kiss you, right? /sf'llp: /.fC}s\\i think i'm a monster. ugly, guilry and sorry. i want to apologize to you whenever you look at me. 4-'Q\\lr +G- your eyes are asking me for something i can't give. * {r' oOr but i try. my stare lingers on you, thinking how much easier this would all be if i could love you. but your dark eyes pierce ''en ,,CIE back again. two empty black holes. nothing. ,!il\\ *> but then i see Her. Gr* looking into Her eyes feels like looking right into the sun, .G| 4h 'g\\ /ls* but i don't care if it burns. f- r$r .rGo' i think i would go blind for a single one of her glances. so boy, let's call it a night. #-

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STRATGE GIRLS cAN THEY.I NARRY LIXE OTHER CIRLS JHAVE CHILDREN I'BE HAPPY ASTHEY ANE WHY? WERE THEY ready, set, springl scratchy guitars and tattered ieans his raspy voice and handmade zine streaks of blonde in Her hair the old comic book we share planning date after date i smoke all day, sleep in late , band tees and boxer briefs skipping class and missing me 4. Love we're still escaping tirne I ;,1 but we're not rvaiting anvmore Mmm! tniov freshh ready for change Bri hope lr s not too late gritled aiQ rlght _E ofl lhe grlll! 8i on that late thursday night saw my favorite bands play live by the barricade stuck in place frt'Nz snuck the srveet smile on Her face 'rlust ffi:-:.\":\"*)I Oa, ,l',t ..i\\' LiFT aa*Pst' rrjnl{ j;, E :\" '\"' .-':'r;+*ili[ IlgE;5EEj* .\" ic.rr'.:irr,lrr, l\"rrirrIniril' 1rr i ,r 1f urrrr\" .:: .:iil:rl\"ti,

ltEw Y0Rt( I LOYE YOU t. ne\\\\'vork air sour taste time passing' PlaYing n'ith fa:e cracked screen and Punk CDs is this reallY haPPening to n'iel we're still escaPing time i but we're not waiting anymore ready for change I hope it's not too late I standing on the stickY floor i hand in hand but Your eyes say more i'11 cherish every single train ride I now i love the Parts of m1'self i hide i L I we're still escaPing time but we're not lvaiting anymore ready for change it's never gonna be too late

\"he looks better as a girl\" a@maeh-conhdence something other PeoPIe wouldn't find funnY flooded in a sea of laughter' the signals of understanding my stomach and cheeks ached but not like how theY usuallY do' a joke i wouldn't be able to speak out loud back when i first met You as the fear whisPered back at me \"i['s too much.\" .r;J; , u iof.. ,trr, i knew would make you laugr-r because through this lens aa i can see every Part ofYou so there, laughing in mY messy room O iost into girlish adolescence' i understood You so queerlY'

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File Edrt View Help sweet nothing .,\"rFin my brother's old 0 obiecttsl 0 tyier ' i don't want any pictures my hand on the back ofYour neck or lingering eyes can i slide down to Your waste we're not some spectacle before i can forget? you use to get off to for the night i don't care if there's Pictures or lingering eYes stumbling to the car to a straight club song our hands draped across the dash you let me in can vou kiss me once more for a night while it fades to black? in the back of the dirtY bar maybe i'm glad there's pictures your hand is n-rY fading hair of me looking in your eyes can we go to the stail it u'as a srveet soft so they don't have to see it all? sour kiss baby for a fleeting time Eile Edit View Help file Edit Yiew Help fl hutes

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WHEN I GET ONTO THE Q TRAIN AFTER A DAY OF CLASS,I BLAST MY MUSIC, CRANK AN EAR-SEARING VOLUME, MUFFLED THROUGH MY SILVER HEADPHONES. AND I LET ALL THE PUNK BOYS SCREAM II BLAKE, BILLIE, BARRY, FRANK, JOE, GLENb ALL GET A TURN SCREAMING BEHIND THE BOOMING DRUMS AND THE PUNCHY ND ALL I WANNA DO IS SOUND LIKE THI HAT PUNK BOY VOICE, WITH THE RASP I AT GRITTY GUTTURAL GROWL. BUT THIS VOICE IS TOO SOFT, TOO GENT] WHEN I SCREAM ALL THAT COMES OUT II STUCK IN THIS BODY I WAS GIVEN. THESE GLASS HANDS CAN,T STRETCH AC, AND THOSE BRIGHT LICHTS WON,T REFL BUT ON THOSE NIGHTS I WAIT FOR, THE DIM CITY STREETS, SMEARED BLACK SIT: I SEE THEM ON STAGE' HEIR DARK.SKINNED HANDS SHINE AS ] SHE STARES INTO THE CROWD IN HYPNC FROM THE DEPTHS OF THE VERY GROUN AND THEN I HEAR IT. IT'S THE SAME NOI AND IT'S BETTER THAN ALL THOSE STUF

\\ LONG, DREADFUI, KED UP TO IN MY EARS. tN, AND TOMMY Y GUITARS. {EM. LIKE HIM. ,AND CRACI(S. rLE. IS A HIGH.PITCHED ACI\"Iti' SAINST THE NECK OF MY C)I I I'I A Ii LECT ON MY BROWN SKIN' ] NIGHTS WHEN I WALK DOWN rTINC UNDER MY EYES, THIJY RIP INTO THE WIRED ST'IIINI OTIC FURY AND SCREAMS ND SHAKING BENEATH MY F-t':II'I' IISE FROM MY THROAT. rPID BOY

thank you so so much for reading' i've wanted to make something like this for a long time and i finally did itl this whole process has broi-rght me out of what feels like a years-long art block and reminded me why ilove art so much' i'm so grateful i got to share some of my lesbian thoughts about guilt, attraction, friendship, fetishization, gender enr,y, and love' i hope you can find something, anything at all,out of these printed pages. thank you again!! and i hope to see you in the next issue <3 d& \"**'r;l, 'q Qe\".d r fr/-.a'#\\nB\\&.' t \\)t f - \\.5/ l'\".Vt ..€ $ T\" t\\ 'Tj, l.\\t'i;ili'* .{ .l A r \\ vn *\\ !*\\ \\

shoot me a message Oboygirlbabbles on instagram :)

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