["accepting\tthat\tothers\tmight\tbe\tmore\tqualified\tor\tspecialized\tin\tareas\tin\twhich you\tconsidered\tyourself\tcompetent\u2014or\tat\tleast\ttheir\ttime\tis\tbetter\tspent\ton\tthem than\tyours. Yes,\tit\twould\tbe\tmore\tfun\tto\tbe\tconstantly\tinvolved\tin\tevery\ttiny\tmatter,\tand might\tmake\tus\tfeel\timportant\tto\tbe\tthe\tperson\tcalled\tto\tput\tout\tfires.\tThe\tlittle things\tare\tendlessly\tengaging\tand\toften\tflattering,\twhile\tthe\tbig\tpicture\tcan\tbe hard\tto\tdiscern.\tIt\u2019s\tnot\talways\tfun,\tbut\tit\tis\tthe\tjob.\tIf\tyou\tdon\u2019t\tthink\tbig\tpicture \u2014because\tyou\u2019re\ttoo\tbusy\tplaying\t\u201cboss\tman\u201d\u2014who\twill? Of\tcourse,\tthere\tis\tno\t\u201cright\u201d\tsystem.\tSometimes\tsystems\tare\tbetter decentralized.\tSometimes\tthey\tare\tbetter\tin\ta\tstrict\thierarchy.\tEvery\tproject\tand goal\tdeserves\tan\tapproach\tfitted\tperfectly\tto\twhat\tneeds\tto\tbe\tdone.\tMaybe\ta creative,\trelaxed\tenvironment\tmakes\tthe\tmost\tsense\tfor\twhat\tyou\u2019re\tdoing. Maybe\tyou\tcan\trun\tyour\tbusiness\tremotely,\tor\tmaybe\tit\u2019s\tbetter\tfor\teveryone\tto see\teach\tother\tface-to-face. What\tmatters\tis\tthat\tyou\tlearn\thow\tto\tmanage\tyourself\tand\tothers,\tbefore your\tindustry\teats\tyou\talive.\tMicromanagers\tare\tegotists\twho\tcan\u2019t\tmanage others\tand\tthey\tquickly\tget\toverloaded.\tSo\tdo\tthe\tcharismatic\tvisionaries\twho lose\tinterest\twhen\tit\u2019s\ttime\tto\texecute.\tWorse\tyet\tare\tthose\twho\tsurround themselves\twith\tyes-men\tor\tsycophants\twho\tclean\tup\ttheir\tmesses\tand\tcreate\ta bubble\tin\twhich\tthey\tcan\u2019t\teven\tsee\thow\tdisconnected\tfrom\treality\tthey\tare. Responsibility\trequires\ta\treadjustment\tand\tthen\tincreased\tclarity\tand\tpurpose. First,\tsetting\tthe\ttop-level\tgoals\tand\tpriorities\tof\tthe\torganization\tand\tyour\tlife. Then\tenforcing\tand\tobserving\tthem.\tTo\tproduce\tresults\tand\tonly\tresults. A\tfish\tstinks\tfrom\tthe\thead,\tis\tthe\tsaying.\tWell,\tyou\u2019re\tthe\thead\tnow.","BEWARE\tTHE\tDISEASE\tOF\tME If\tI\tam\tnot\tfor\tmyself\twho\twill\tbe\tfor\tme?\tIf\tI\tam\tonly\tfor\tmyself,\twho\tam\tI? \u2014HILLEL T here\twere\tgreat\tAllied\tgenerals\tof\tWorld\tWar\tII\u2014Patton,\tBradley, Montgomery,\tEisenhower,\tMacArthur,\tZhukov\u2014and\tthen\tthere\twas\tGeorge Catlett\tMarshall\tJr.\tAlthough\tall\tof\tthem\tserved\ttheir\tcountries\tand\tfought\tand led\tbravely,\tone\tstands\tapart. Today,\twe\tsee\tWorld\tWar\tII\tas\ta\tclear\tfight\tin\twhich\tgood\taligned\tselflessly against\tevil.\tThe\tproblem\tis\tthat\tvictory\tand\tthe\tpassage\tof\ttime\thave\tobscured the\tall-too-humanness\tof\tthe\tpeople\twho\twere\ton\tthe\tright\tside\tof\tthat\tfight. That\tis:\twe\tforget\tthe\tpolitics,\tthe\tbackstabbing,\tthe\tspotlight\tcoveting,\tthe posturing,\tthe\tgreed,\tand\tthe\tass-covering\tamong\tthe\tAllies.\tWhile\tthe\tother generals\tprotected\ttheir\tturf,\tfought\twith\teach\tother,\tand\teagerly\taspired\tto\ttheir place\tin\thistory,\tthat\tbehavior\twas\tvirtually\tabsent\tin\tone\tman:\tGeneral\tGeorge Marshall. More\timpressively,\tMarshall\tquietly\toutpaced\tall\tof\tthem\twith\tthe\tmagnitude of\this\taccomplishments.\tWhat\twas\this\tsecret? Pat\tRiley,\tthe\tfamous\tcoach\tand\tmanager\twho\tled\tthe\tLos\tAngeles\tLakers and\tMiami\tHeat\tto\tmultiple\tchampionships,\tsays\tthat\tgreat\tteams\ttend\tto\tfollow a\ttrajectory.\tWhen\tthey\tstart\u2014before\tthey\thave\twon\u2014a\tteam\tis\tinnocent.\tIf\tthe conditions\tare\tright,\tthey\tcome\ttogether,\tthey\twatch\tout\tfor\teach\tother\tand\twork together\ttoward\ttheir\tcollective\tgoal.\tThis\tstage,\the\tcalls\tthe\t\u201cInnocent\tClimb.\u201d After\ta\tteam\tstarts\tto\twin\tand\tmedia\tattention\tbegins,\tthe\tsimple\tbonds\tthat joined\tthe\tindividuals\ttogether\tbegin\tto\tfray.\tPlayers\tcalculate\ttheir\town importance.\tChests\tswell.\tFrustrations\temerge.\tEgos\tappear.\tThe\tInnocent Climb,\tPat\tRiley\tsays,\tis\talmost\talways\tfollowed\tby\tthe\t\u201cDisease\tof\tMe.\u201d\tIt\tcan \u201cstrike\tany\twinning\tteam\tin\tany\tyear\tand\tat\tany\tmoment,\u201d\tand\tdoes\twith alarming\tregularity.","It\u2019s\tShaq\tand\tKobe,\tunable\tto\tplay\ttogether.\tIt\u2019s\tJordan\tpunching\tSteve\tKerr, Horace\tGrant,\tand\tWill\tPerdue\u2014his\town\tteam\tmembers.\tHe\tpunched\tpeople\ton his\town\tteam!\tIt\u2019s\tEnron\temployees\tplunging\tCalifornia\tinto\tdarkness\tfor personal\tprofit.\tIt\u2019s\tleaks\tto\tthe\tmedia\tfrom\ta\tdisgruntled\texecutive\thoping\tto scuttle\ta\tproject\the\tdislikes.\tIt\u2019s\tnegging\tand\tevery\tother\tintimidation\ttactic. For\tus,\tit\u2019s\tbeginning\tto\tthink\tthat\twe\u2019re\tbetter,\tthat\twe\u2019re\tspecial,\tthat\tour problems\tand\texperiences\tare\tso\tincredibly\tdifferent\tfrom\teveryone\telse\u2019s\tthat no\tone\tcould\tpossibly\tunderstand.\tIt\u2019s\tan\tattitude\tthat\thas\tsunk\tfar\tbetter\tpeople, teams,\tand\tcauses\tthan\tours. With\tGeneral\tMarshall,\twho\tbegan\this\tterm\tas\tchief\tof\tstaff\tof\tthe\tU.S.\tArmy on\tthe\tday\tGermany\tinvaded\tPoland\tin\t1939\tand\tserved\tthrough\tthe\tentire\twar, we\tsee\tone\tof\thistory\u2019s\tfew\texceptions\tto\tthis\ttrend.\tMarshall\tsomehow\tnever caught\tthe\tDisease\tof\tMe,\tand\tin\tmany\tways,\toften\tshamed\tit\tout\tof\tthe\tpeople who\tdid. It\tbegins\twith\this\tbalanced\trelationship\tto\trank,\tan\tobsession\tfor\tmost\tpeople in\this\tline\tof\twork. He\twas\tnot\ta\tman\twho\tabstained\tfrom\tevery\tpublic\tshow\tof\trank\tor\tstatus.\tHe insisted\tthat\tthe\tpresident\tcall\thim\tGeneral\tMarshall,\tnot\tGeorge,\tfor\texample. (He\tearned\tit,\tright?)\tBut\twhile\tother\tgenerals\tregularly\tlobbied\tfor\tpromotions \u2014General\tMacArthur\tadvanced\tover\tother\tofficers\tin\tthe\tprewar\tyears\tlargely due\tto\tthe\taggressive\tefforts\tof\this\tmother\u2014Marshall\tactively\tdiscouraged\tit. When\tothers\tbegan\tto\tpush\tfor\tMarshall\tto\tbe\tchief\tof\tstaff,\the\tasked\tthem\tto stop,\tbecause\t\u201c[it]\tmakes\tme\tconspicuous\tin\tthe\tarmy.\tToo\tconspicuous\tin\tfact.\u201d Later,\the\tdiscouraged\tan\teffort\tby\tthe\tHouse\tto\tpass\ta\tbill\tawarding\thim\tthe\trank of\tfield\tmarshal\u2014not\tonly\tbecause\the\tthought\tthe\tname\tField\tMarshal\tMarshall would\tsound\tridiculous,\tbut\tbecause\the\tdidn\u2019t\twant\tto\toutrank\tor\thurt\this mentor,\tGeneral\tPershing,\twho\twas\tnear\tdeath\tand\ta\tconstant\tsource\tof\tadvice and\tguidance. Can\tyou\timagine?\tIn\tall\tthese\tcases,\this\tsense\tof\thonor\tmeant\tturning\tdown honors,\tand\toften\tletting\tthem\tgo\tto\tother\tpeople.\tLike\tany\tnormal\thuman\tbeing, he\twanted\tthem,\tonly\tthe\tright\tway.\tMore\timportant,\the\tknew\tthat,\thowever\tnice they\twould\thave\tbeen\tto\thave,\the\tcould\tdo\twithout\tthem\twhile\tperhaps\tothers could\tnot.\tEgo\tneeds\thonors\tin\torder\tto\tbe\tvalidated.\tConfidence,\ton\tthe\tother hand,\tis\table\tto\twait\tand\tfocus\ton\tthe\ttask\tat\thand\tregardless\tof\texternal recognition. Early\ton\tin\tour\tcareers,\twe\tmay\tbe\table\tto\tmake\tthese\tsacrifices\tmore\teasily. We\tcan\tdrop\tout\tof\ta\tprestigious\tcollege\tto\tstart\tour\town\tcompany.\tOr\twe\tcan","tolerate\tbeing\tlooked\tover\tonce\tin\ta\twhile.\tOnce\twe\u2019ve\t\u201cmade\tit,\u201c\tthe\ttendency is\tto\tswitch\tto\tthe\tmind-set\tof\t\u201cgetting\twhat\u2019s\tmine.\u201d\tNow,\tall\tof\ta\tsudden awards\tand\trecognition\tmatter\u2014even\tthough\tthey\tweren\u2019t\twhat\tgot\tus\there.\tWe need\tthat\tmoney,\tthat\ttitle,\tthat\tmedia\tattention\u2014not\tfor\tthe\tteam\tor\tthe\tcause, but\tfor\tourselves.\tBecause\twe\u2019ve\tearned\tit. Let\u2019s\tmake\tone\tthing\tclear:\twe\tnever\tearn\tthe\tright\tto\tbe\tgreedy\tor\tto\tpursue our\tinterests\tat\tthe\texpense\tof\teveryone\telse.\tTo\tthink\totherwise\tis\tnot\tonly egotistical,\tit\u2019s\tcounterproductive. Marshall\twas\ttested\ton\tthis\tto\tthe\textreme.\tA\tjob\the\u2019d\ttrained\this\twhole\tlife for\twas\tup\tfor\tgrabs:\tcommand\tof\tthe\ttroops\ton\tD-Day,\tessentially\tthe\tlargest coordinated\tinvasion\tthe\tworld\thad\tever\tseen.\tRoosevelt\tlet\tit\tbe\tknown\tthat\tit was\tMarshall\u2019s\tif\the\twanted\tit.\tA\tgeneral\u2019s\tplace\tin\thistory\tis\tassured\tby\this\tfeats in\tbattle,\tso\teven\tthough\tMarshall\twas\tneeded\tin\tWashington,\tRoosevelt\twanted to\tgive\thim\tthe\topportunity\tto\ttake\tcommand.\tMarshall\twould\thave\tnone\tof\tit. \u201cThe\tdecision\tis\tyours,\tMr.\tPresident;\tmy\twishes\thave\tnothing\tto\tdo\twith\tthe matter.\u201d\tThe\trole\tand\tthe\tglory\twent\tto\tEisenhower. It\tcame\tto\tbe\tthat\tEisenhower\twas,\tin\tfact,\tthe\tbest\tman\tfor\tthat\tjob.\tHe performed\tsuperbly\tand\thelped\twin\tthe\twar.\tWould\tanything\telse\thave\tbeen worth\tthe\ttrade-off? Yet\tthis\tis\twhat\twe\tregularly\trefuse\tto\tdo;\tour\tego\tprecludes\tserving\tany larger\tmission\twe\u2019re\ta\tpart\tof. What\tare\twe\tgoing\tto\tdo?\tLet\tsomeone\tget\tone\tover\ton\tus? The\twriter\tCheryl\tStrayed\tonce\ttold\ta\tyoung\treader,\t\u201cYou\u2019re\tbecoming\twho you\tare\tgoing\tto\tbe\tand\tso\tyou\tmight\tas\twell\tnot\tbe\tan\tasshole.\u201d\tThis\tis\tone\tof the\tmost\tdangerous\tironies\tof\tsuccess\u2014it\tcan\tmake\tus\tsomeone\twe\tnever wanted\tto\tbe\tin\tthe\tfirst\tplace.\tThe\tDisease\tof\tMe\tcan\tcorrupt\tthe\tmost\tinnocent climb. There\twas\ta\tgeneral\twho\ttreated\tMarshall\tpoorly\u2014essentially\tbanishing\thim to\tsome\tobscure\tpostings\tin\tthe\tmiddle\tof\this\tcareer.\tLater,\tMarshall\tsurpassed him\tand\thad\this\tchance\tfor\trevenge.\tExcept\u2014he\tdidn\u2019t\ttake\tit.\tBecause whatever\tthe\tman\u2019s\tflaws,\tMarshall\tsaw\tthat\the\twas\tstill\tof\tuse\tand\tthat\tthe country\twould\tbe\tworse\toff\twithout\thim.\tWhat\twere\tthe\tthanks\tfor\tthis\tquiet suppression\tof\tego?\tJust\tanother\tjob\twell\tdone\u2014and\tnot\tmuch\tmore. The\tword\tfor\tthat\tis\tone\twe\tdon\u2019t\tuse\tmuch\tanymore:\tmagnanimous.\tIt\twas good\tstrategy\ttoo,\tof\tcourse,\tbut\tmostly\tMarshall\twas\tgracious,\tforgiving,\tand magnanimous\tbecause\tit\twas\tright.\tAccording\tto\tobservers\tas\thigh\tup\tas","President\tTruman,\twhat\tseparated\tMarshall\tfrom\tnearly\teveryone\telse\tin\tthe military\tand\tpolitics\tis\tthat\t\u201cnever\tdid\tGeneral\tMarshall\tthink\tabout\thimself.\u201d There\tis\tanother\tstory\tof\tMarshall\tsitting\tfor\tone\tof\tthe\tmany\tofficial\tportraits that\twas\trequired\tof\thim.\tAfter\tappearing\tmany\ttimes\tand\tpatiently\thonoring\tthe requests,\tMarshall\twas\tfinally\tinformed\tby\tthe\tpainter\tthat\the\twas\tfinished\tand free\tto\tgo.\tMarshall\tstood\tup\tand\tbegan\tto\tleave.\t\u201cDon\u2019t\tyou\twant\tto\tsee\tthe painting?\u201d\tthe\tartist\tasked.\t\u201cNo,\tthank\tyou,\u201d\tMarshall\tsaid\trespectfully\tand\tleft. Is\tthat\tto\tsay\tthat\tmanaging\tyour\timage\tisn\u2019t\timportant?\tOf\tcourse\tnot.\tEarly in\tyour\tcareer,\tyou\u2019ll\tnotice\tthat\tyou\tjump\ton\tevery\topportunity\tto\tdo\tso.\tAs\tyou become\tmore\taccomplished,\tyou\u2019ll\trealize\tthat\tso\tmuch\tof\tit\tis\ta\tdistraction\tfrom your\twork\u2014time\tspent\twith\treporters,\twith\tawards,\tand\twith\tmarketing\tare\ttime away\tfrom\twhat\tyou\treally\tcare\tabout. Who\thas\ttime\tto\tlook\tat\ta\tpicture\tof\thimself?\tWhat\u2019s\tthe\tpoint? As\this\twife\tlater\tobserved,\tthe\tpeople\twho\tsaw\tGeorge\tMarshall\tas\tsimply modest\tor\tquiet\tmissed\twhat\twas\tspecial\tabout\tthe\tman.\tHe\thad\tthe\tsame\ttraits that\teveryone\thas\u2014ego,\tself-interest,\tpride,\tdignity,\tambition\u2014but\tthey\twere \u201ctempered\tby\ta\tsense\tof\thumility\tand\tselflessness.\u201d It\tdoesn\u2019t\tmake\tyou\ta\tbad\tperson\tto\twant\tto\tbe\tremembered.\tTo\twant\tto\tmake it\tto\tthe\ttop.\tTo\tprovide\tfor\tyourself\tand\tyour\tfamily.\tAfter\tall,\tthat\u2019s\tall\tpart\tof the\tallure. There\tis\ta\tbalance.\tSoccer\tcoach\tTony\tAdams\texpresses\tit\twell.\tPlay\tfor\tthe name\ton\tthe\tfront\tof\tthe\tjersey,\the\tsays,\tand\tthey\u2019ll\tremember\tthe\tname\ton\tthe back. When\tit\tcomes\tto\tMarshall,\tthe\told\tidea\tthat\tselflessness\tand\tintegrity\tcould be\tweaknesses\tor\thold\tsomeone\tback\tare\tlaughably\tdisproven.\tSure,\tsome people\tmight\thave\ttrouble\ttelling\tyou\tmuch\tabout\thim\u2014but\teach\tand\tevery\tone of\tthem\tlives\tin\ta\tworld\the\twas\tlargely\tresponsible\tfor\tshaping. The\tcredit?\tWho\tcares.","MEDITATE\tON\tTHE\tIMMENSITY A\tmonk\tis\ta\tman\twho\tis\tseparated\tfrom\tall\tand\twho\tis\tin\tharmony\twith\tall. \u2014EVAGRIUS\tPONTICUS I n\t1879,\tthe\tpreservationist\tand\texplorer\tJohn\tMuir\ttook\this\tfirst\ttrip\tto Alaska.\tAs\the\texplored\tthe\tfjords\tand\trocky\tlandscapes\tof\tAlaska\u2019s\tnow famous\tGlacier\tBay,\ta\tpowerful\tfeeling\tstruck\thim\tall\tat\tonce.\tHe\u2019d\talways\tbeen in\tlove\twith\tnature,\tand\there\tin\tthe\tunique\tsummer\tclimate\tof\tthe\tfar\tnorth,\tin this\tsingle\tmoment,\tit\twas\tas\tif\tthe\tentire\tworld\twas\tin\tsync.\tAs\tif\the\tcould\tsee the\tentire\tecosystem\tand\tcircle\tof\tlife\tbefore\thim.\tHis\tpulse\tbegan\tto\tpick\tup, and\the\tand\tthe\tgroup\twere\t\u201cwarmed\tand\tquickened\tinto\tsympathy\twith everything,\ttaken\tback\tinto\tthe\theart\tof\tnature\u201d\tfrom\twhich\twe\tall\tcame. Thankfully,\tMuir\tnoticed\tand\trecorded\tin\this\tjournal\tthe\tbeautiful\tcohesion\tof the\tworld\taround\thim,\twhich\tfew\thave\tever\tmatched\tsince. We\tfeel\tthe\tlife\tand\tmotion\tabout\tus,\tand\tthe\tuniversal\tbeauty:\tthe\ttides marching\tback\tand\tforth\twith\tweariless\tindustry,\tlaving\tthe\tbeautiful shores,\tand\tswaying\tthe\tpurple\tdulse\tof\tthe\tbroad\tmeadows\tof\tthe\tsea where\tthe\tfishes\tare\tfed,\tthe\twild\tstreams\tin\trows\twhite\twith\twaterfalls, ever\tin\tbloom\tand\tever\tin\tsong,\tspreading\ttheir\tbranches\tover\ta\tthousand mountains;\tthe\tvast\tforests\tfeeding\ton\tthe\tdrenching\tsunbeams,\tevery\tcell in\ta\twhirl\tof\tenjoyment;\tmisty\tflocks\tof\tinsects\tstirring\tall\tthe\tair,\tthe\twild sheep\tand\tgoats\ton\tthe\tgrassy\tridges\tabove\tthe\twoods,\tbears\tin\tthe\tberry- tangles,\tmink\tand\tbeaver\tand\totter\tfar\tback\ton\tmany\ta\triver\tand\tlake; Indians\tand\tadventurers\tpursuing\ttheir\tlonely\tways;\tbirds\ttending\tto\ttheir young\u2014everywhere,\teverywhere,\tbeauty\tand\tlife,\tand\tglad,\trejoicing action.","In\tthis\tmoment,\the\twas\texperiencing\twhat\tthe\tStoics\twould\tcall\tsympatheia \u2014a\tconnectedness\twith\tthe\tcosmos.The\tFrench\tphilosopher\tPierre\tHadot\thas referred\tto\tit\tas\tthe\t\u201coceanic\tfeeling.\u201d\tA\tsense\tof\tbelonging\tto\tsomething\tlarger, of\trealizing\tthat\t\u201chuman\tthings\tare\tan\tinfinitesimal\tpoint\tin\tthe\timmensity.\u201d\tIt\tis in\tthese\tmoments\tthat\twe\u2019re\tnot\tonly\tfree\tbut\tdrawn\ttoward\timportant\tquestions: Who\tam\tI?\tWhat\tam\tI\tdoing?\tWhat\tis\tmy\trole\tin\tthis\tworld? Nothing\tdraws\tus\taway\tfrom\tthose\tquestions\tlike\tmaterial\tsuccess\u2014when\twe are\talways\tbusy,\tstressed,\tput\tupon,\tdistracted,\treported\tto,\trelied\ton,\tapart\tfrom. When\twe\u2019re\twealthy\tand\ttold\tthat\twe\u2019re\timportant\tor\tpowerful.\tEgo\ttells\tus\tthat meaning\tcomes\tfrom\tactivity,\tthat\tbeing\tthe\tcenter\tof\tattention\tis\tthe\tonly\tway\tto matter. When\twe\tlack\ta\tconnection\tto\tanything\tlarger\tor\tbigger\tthan\tus,\tit\u2019s\tlike\ta piece\tof\tour\tsoul\tis\tgone.\tLike\twe\u2019ve\tdetached\tourselves\tfrom\tthe\ttraditions\twe hail\tfrom,\twhatever\tthat\thappens\tto\tbe\t(a\tcraft,\ta\tsport,\ta\tbrotherhood\tor sisterhood,\ta\tfamily).\tEgo\tblocks\tus\tfrom\tthe\tbeauty\tand\thistory\tin\tthe\tworld.\tIt stands\tin\tthe\tway. No\twonder\twe\tfind\tsuccess\tempty.\tNo\twonder\twe\u2019re\texhausted.\tNo\twonder\tit feels\tlike\twe\u2019re\ton\ta\ttreadmill.\tNo\twonder\twe\tlose\ttouch\twith\tthe\tenergy\tthat once\tfueled\tus. Here\u2019s\tan\texercise:\twalk\tonto\tancient\tbattlefield\tor\ta\tplace\tof\thistorical significance.\tLook\tat\tthe\tstatues\tand\tyou\tcan\u2019t\thelp\tbut\tsee\thow\tsimilar\tthe people\tlook,\thow\tlittle\thas\tchanged\tsince\tthen\u2014since\tbefore,\tand\thow\tit\twill\tbe forever\tafter.\tHere\ta\tgreat\tman\tonce\tstood.\tHere\tanother\tbrave\twoman\tdied. Here\ta\tcruel\trich\tman\tlived,\tin\tthis\tpalatial\thome\t.\t.\t.\tIt\u2019s\tthe\tsense\tthat\tothers have\tbeen\there\tbefore\tyou,\tgenerations\tof\tthem,\tin\tfact. In\tthose\tmoments,\twe\thave\ta\tsense\tof\tthe\timmensity\tof\tthe\tworld.\tEgo\tis impossible,\tbecause\twe\trealize,\tif\tonly\tfleetingly,\twhat\tEmerson\tmeant\twhen\the said\tthat\t\u201cEvery\tman\tis\ta\tquotation\tfrom\tall\this\tancestors.\u201d\tThey\tare\tpart\tof\tus, we\tare\tpart\tof\ta\ttradition.\tEmbrace\tthe\tpower\tof\tthis\tposition\tand\tlearn\tfrom\tit.\tIt is\tan\texhilarating\tfeeling\tto\tgrasp\tthis,\tlike\tthe\tone\tthat\tMuir\tfelt\tin\tAlaska.\tYes, we\tare\tsmall.\tWe\tare\talso\ta\tpiece\tof\tthis\tgreat\tuniverse\tand\ta\tprocess. The\tastrophysicist\tNeil\tdeGrasse\tTyson\thas\tdescribed\tthis\tduality\twell\u2014it\u2019s possible\tto\tbask\tin\tboth\tyour\trelevance\tand\tirrelevance\tto\tthe\tcosmos.\tAs\the says,\t\u201cWhen\tI\tlook\tup\tin\tthe\tuniverse,\tI\tknow\tI\u2019m\tsmall,\tbut\tI\u2019m\talso\tbig.\tI\u2019m big\tbecause\tI\u2019m\tconnected\tto\tthe\tuniverse\tand\tthe\tuniverse\tis\tconnected\tto\tme.\u201d We\tjust\tcan\u2019t\tforget\twhich\tis\tbigger\tand\twhich\thas\tbeen\there\tlonger.","Why\tdo\tyou\tthink\tthat\tgreat\tleaders\tand\tthinkers\tthroughout\thistory\thave \u201cgone\tout\tinto\tthe\twilderness\u201d\tand\tcome\tback\twith\tinspiration,\twith\ta\tplan,\twith an\texperience\tthat\tputs\tthem\ton\ta\tcourse\tthat\tchanges\tthe\tworld?\tIt\u2019s\tbecause\tin doing\tso\tthey\tfound\tperspective,\tthey\tunderstood\tthe\tlarger\tpicture\tin\ta\tway\tthat wasn\u2019t\tpossible\tin\tthe\tbustle\tof\teveryday\tlife.\tSilencing\tthe\tnoise\taround\tthem, they\tcould\tfinally\thear\tthe\tquiet\tvoice\tthey\tneeded\tto\tlisten\tto. Creativity\tis\ta\tmatter\tof\treceptiveness\tand\trecognition.\tThis\tcannot\thappen\tif you\u2019re\tconvinced\tthe\tworld\trevolves\taround\tyou. By\tremoving\tthe\tego\u2014even\ttemporarily\u2014we\tcan\taccess\twhat\u2019s\tleft\tstanding in\trelief.\tBy\twidening\tour\tperspective,\tmore\tcomes\tinto\tview. It\u2019s\tsad\thow\tdisconnected\tfrom\tthe\tpast\tand\tthe\tfuture\tmost\tof\tus\treally\tare. We\tforget\tthat\twoolly\tmammoths\twalked\tthe\tearth\twhile\tthe\tpyramids\twere being\tbuilt.\tWe\tdon\u2019t\trealize\tthat\tCleopatra\tlived\tcloser\tto\tour\ttime\tthan\tshe\tdid to\tthe\tconstruction\tof\tthose\tfamous\tpyramids\tthat\tmarked\ther\tkingdom.\tWhen British\tworkers\texcavated\tthe\tland\tin\tTrafalgar\tSquare\tto\tbuild\tNelson\u2019s\tColumn and\tits\tfamous\tstone\tlions,\tin\tthe\tground\tthey\tfound\tthe\tbones\tof\tactual\tlions, who\u2019d\troamed\tthat\texact\tspot\tjust\ta\tfew\tthousand\tyears\tbefore.\tSomeone recently\tcalculated\tthat\tit\ttakes\tbut\ta\tchain\tof\tsix\tindividuals\twho\tshook\thands with\tone\tanother\tacross\tthe\tcenturies\tto\tconnect\tBarack\tObama\tto\tGeorge Washington.\tThere\u2019s\ta\tvideo\tyou\tcan\twatch\ton\tYouTube\tof\ta\tman\ton\ta\tCBS game\tshow,\t\u201cI\u2019ve\tGot\ta\tSecret,\u201d\tin\t1956,\tin\tan\tepisode\tthat\talso\thappened\tto feature\ta\tfamous\tactress\tnamed\tLucille\tBall.\tHis\tsecret?\tHe\twas\tin\tFord\u2019s Theatre\twhen\tLincoln\twas\tassassinated.\tEngland\u2019s\tgovernment\tonly\trecently paid\toff\tdebts\tit\tincurred\tas\tfar\tback\tas\t1720\tfrom\tevents\tlike\tthe\tSouth\tSea Bubble,\tthe\tNapoleonic\twars,\tthe\tempire\u2019s\tabolition\tof\tslavery,\tand\tthe\tIrish potato\tfamine\u2014meaning\tthat\tin\tthe\ttwenty-first\tcentury\tthere\twas\tstill\ta\tdirect and\tdaily\tconnection\tto\tthe\teighteenth\tand\tnineteenth\tcenturies. As\tour\tpower\tor\ttalents\tgrow,\twe\tlike\tto\tthink\tthat\tmakes\tus\tspecial\u2014that\twe live\tin\tblessed,\tunprecedented\ttimes.\tThis\tis\tcompounded\tby\tthe\tfact\tthat\tso many\tof\tthe\tphotos\twe\tsee\tfrom\teven\tfifty\tyears\tago\tare\tstill\tin\tblack\tand\twhite, and\twe\tseem\tto\tassume\tthat\tthe\tworld\twas\tin\tblack\tand\twhite.\tObviously,\tit wasn\u2019t\u2014their\tsky\twas\tthe\tsame\tcolor\tas\tours\t(in\tsome\tplaces\tbrighter\tthan\tours), they\tbled\tthe\tsame\tway\twe\tdid,\tand\ttheir\tcheeks\tgot\tflushed\tjust\tlike\tours\tdo. We\tare\tjust\tlike\tthem,\tand\talways\twill\tbe. \u201cIt\u2019s\thard\tto\tbe\thumble\twhen\tyou\u2019re\tas\tgreat\tas\tI\tam,\u201d\tMuhammad\tAli\tonce said.\tYeah,\tokay.\tThat\u2019s\twhy\tgreat\tpeople\thave\tto\twork\teven\tharder\tto\tfight against\tthis\theadwind.\tIt\u2019s\thard\tto\tbe\tself-absorbed\tand\tconvinced\tof\tyour\town","greatness\tinside\tthe\tsolitude\tand\tquiet\tof\ta\tsensory\tdeprivation\ttank.\tIt\u2019s\thard\tto be\tanything\tbut\thumble\twalking\talone\talong\ta\tbeach\tlate\tat\tnight\twith\tan\tendless black\tocean\tcrashing\tloudly\tagainst\tthe\tground\tnext\tto\tyou. We\thave\tto\tactively\tseek\tout\tthis\tcosmic\tsympathy.\tThere\u2019s\tthe\tfamous\tBlake poem\tthat\topens\twith\t\u201cTo\tsee\ta\tWorld\tin\ta\tGrain\tof\tSand\t\/\tAnd\ta\tHeaven\tin\ta Wild\tFlower\t\/\tHold\tInfinity\tin\tthe\tpalm\tof\tyour\thand\t\/\tAnd\tEternity\tin\tan\thour.\u201d That\u2019s\twhat\twe\u2019re\tafter\there.\tThat\u2019s\tthe\ttranscendental\texperience\tthat\tmakes\tour petty\tego\timpossible. Feel\tunprotected\tagainst\tthe\telements\tor\tforces\tor\tsurroundings.\tRemind yourself\thow\tpointless\tit\tis\tto\trage\tand\tfight\tand\ttry\tto\tone-up\tthose\taround\tyou. Go\tand\tput\tyourself\tin\ttouch\twith\tthe\tinfinite,\tand\tend\tyour\tconscious\tseparation from\tthe\tworld.\tReconcile\tyourself\ta\tbit\tbetter\twith\tthe\trealities\tof\tlife.\tRealize how\tmuch\tcame\tbefore\tyou,\tand\thow\tonly\twisps\tof\tit\tremain. Let\tthe\tfeeling\tcarry\tyou\tas\tlong\tas\tyou\tcan.\tThen\twhen\tyou\tstart\tto\tfeel better\tor\tbigger\tthan,\tgo\tand\tdo\tit\tagain.","MAINTAIN\tYOUR\tSOBRIETY The\theight\tof\tcultivation\truns\tto\tsimplicity. \u2014BRUCE\tLEE A ngela\tMerkel\tis\tthe\tantithesis\tof\tnearly\tevery\tassumption\twe\tmake\tabout\ta head\tof\tstate\u2014especially\ta\tGerman\tone.\tShe\tis\tplain.\tShe\tis\tmodest.\tShe cares\tlittle\tfor\tpresentation\tor\tflash.\tShe\tgives\tno\tfiery\tspeeches.\tShe\thas\tno interest\tin\texpansion\tor\tdomination.\tMostly,\tshe\tis\tquiet\tand\treserved. Chancellor\tAngela\tMerkel\tis\tsober,\twhen\tfar\ttoo\tmany\tleaders\tare intoxicated\u2014with\tego,\twith\tpower,\twith\tposition.\tThis\tsobriety\tis\tprecisely\twhat has\tmade\ther\ta\twildly\tpopular\tthree-term\tleader\tand,\tparadoxically,\ta\tpowerful, sweeping\tforce\tfor\tfreedom\tand\tpeace\tin\tmodern\tEurope. There\tis\ta\tstory\tabout\tMerkel\tas\ta\tyoung\tgirl,\tat\ta\tswimming\tlesson.\tShe walked\tout\ton\tthe\tdiving\tboard\tand\tstood\tthere,\tthinking\tabout\twhether\tshe should\tjump.\tMinutes\tticked\tby.\tMore\tminutes.\tFinally,\tjust\tas\tthe\tbell\tmarking the\tend\tof\tthe\tlesson\tbegan\tto\tring,\tshe\tjumped.\tWas\tshe\tafraid\tor\tjust\tcautious? Many\tyears\tlater,\tshe\twould\tremind\tEurope\u2019s\tleaders\tduring\ta\tmajor\tcrisis\tthat \u201cFear\tis\ta\tbad\tadvisor.\u201d\tAs\ta\tkid\ton\tthat\tdiving\tboard,\tshe\twanted\tto\tuse\tevery allotted\tsecond\tto\tmake\tthe\tright\tdecision,\tnot\tdriven\tby\trecklessness\tor\tfear. In\tmost\tcases,\twe\tthink\tthat\tpeople\tbecome\tsuccessful\tthrough\tsheer\tenergy and\tenthusiasm.\tWe\talmost\texcuse\tego\tbecause\twe\tthink\tit\u2019s\tpart\tand\tparcel\tof the\tpersonality\trequired\tto\t\u201cmake\tit\tbig.\u201d\tMaybe\ta\tbit\tof\tthat\toverpoweringness is\twhat\tgot\tyou\twhere\tyou\tare.\tBut\tlet\u2019s\task:\tIs\tit\treally\tsustainable\tfor\tthe\tnext several\tdecades?\tCan\tyou\treally\toutwork\tand\toutrun\teveryone\tforever? The\tanswer\tis\tno.\tThe\tego\ttells\tus\twe\u2019re\tinvincible,\tthat\twe\thave\tunlimited force\tthat\twill\tnever\tdissipate.\tBut\tthat\tcan\u2019t\tbe\twhat\tgreatness\trequires\u2014energy without\tend? Merkel\tis\tthe\tembodiment\tof\tAesop\u2019s\tfable\tabout\tthe\ttortoise.\tShe\tis\tslow\tand steady.\tThe\thistoric\tnight\tthe\tBerlin\tWall\tfell,\tshe\twas\tthirty-five.\tShe\thad\tone","beer,\twent\tto\tbed,\tand\tshowed\tup\tearly\tfor\twork\tthe\tnext\tday.\tA\tfew\tyears\tlater, she\thad\tworked\tto\tbecome\ta\trespected\tbut\tobscure\tphysicist.\tOnly\tthen\tdid\tshe enter\tpolitics.\tIn\ther\tfifties,\tshe\tbecame\tchancellor.\tIt\twas\ta\tdiligent,\tplodding path. Yet\tthe\trest\tof\tus\twant\tto\tget\tto\tthe\ttop\tas\tfast\tas\thumanly\tpossible.\tWe\thave no\tpatience\tfor\twaiting.\tWe\u2019re\thigh\ton\tgetting\thigh\tup\tthe\tranks.\tOnce\twe\u2019ve made\tit,\twe\ttend\tto\tthink\tthat\tego\tand\tenergy\tis\tthe\tonly\tway\tto\tstay\tthere.\tIt\u2019s not. When\tRussian\tpresident\tVladimir\tPutin\tonce\tattempted\tto\tintimidate\tMerkel by\tletting\this\tlarge\thunting\tdog\tbarge\tinto\ta\tmeeting\t(she\tis\treportedly\tnot\ta\tdog lover),\tshe\tdidn\u2019t\tflinch\tand\tlater\tjoked\tabout\tit.\tAs\ta\tresult,\the\twas\tthe\tone\twho looked\tfoolish\tand\tinsecure.\tDuring\ther\trise\tand\tespecially\tduring\ther\ttime\tin power,\tshe\thas\tconsistently\tmaintained\ther\tequilibrium\tand\tclearheadedness, regardless\tof\tthe\timmediate\tstressors\tor\tstimuli. In\ta\tsimilar\tposition,\twe\tmight\thave\tsprung\tinto\t\u201cbold\u201d\taction;\twe\tmight\thave gotten\tangry\tor\tdrawn\ta\tline\tin\tthe\tsand.\tWe\thave\tto\tstand\tup\tfor\tourselves, right?\tBut\tdo\twe?\tSo\toften,\tthis\tis\tjust\tego,\tescalating\ttension\tmore\tthan\tdealing with\tit.\tMerkel\tis\tfirm,\tclear,\tand\tpatient.\tShe\u2019s\twilling\tto\tcompromise\ton everything\texcept\tthe\tprinciple\tat\tstake\u2014which\tfar\ttoo\tmany\tpeople\tlose\tsight of. That\tis\tsobriety.\tThat\tis\tcommand\tof\toneself. She\tdid\tnot\tbecome\tthe\tmost\tpowerful\twoman\tin\tthe\tWestern\tworld\tby accident.\tMore\timportantly,\tshe\u2019s\tmaintained\ther\tperch\tfor\tthree\tterms\twith\tthe same\tformula. The\tgreat\tphilosopher\tking\tMarcus\tAurelius\tknew\tthis\tvery\twell.\tCalled\tto politics\talmost\tagainst\this\twill,\the\tserved\tthe\tRoman\tpeople\tin\tcontinually higher\toffices\tfrom\this\tteens\tuntil\this\tdeath.\tThere\twas\talways\tpressing\tbusiness \u2014appeals\tto\thear,\twars\tto\tfight,\tlaws\tto\tpass,\tfavors\tto\tgrant.\tHe\tstrove\tto\tescape what\the\tcalled\t\u201cimperialization\u201d\u2014the\tstain\tof\tabsolute\tpower\tthat\thad\twrecked previous\temperors.\tTo\tdo\tthat,\the\twrote\tto\thimself,\the\tmust\t\u201cfight\tto\tbe\tthe person\tphilosophy\ttried\tto\tmake\tyou.\u201d This\tis\twhy\tthe\tZen\tphilosopher\tZuigan\tis\tsupposed\tto\thave\tcalled\tout\tto himself\teveryday: \u201cMASTER\u2014\u201d \u201cYES,\tSIR?\u201d","Then\the\twould\tadd: \u201cBECOME\tSOBER.\u201d \u201cYES,\tSIR.\u201d He\twould\tconclude\tby\tsaying: \u201cDO\tNOT\tBE\tDECEIVED\tBY\tOTHERS.\u201d \u201cYES\tSIR,\tYES\tSIR.\u201d Today,\twe\tmight\tadd\tto\tthat: \u201cDON\u2019T\tBE\tDECEIVED\tBY\tRECOGNITION\tYOU\tHAVE\tGOTTEN\tOR\tTHE\tAMOUNT\tOF MONEY\tIN\tYOUR\tBANK\tACCOUNT.\u201d We\thave\tto\tfight\tto\tstay\tsober,\tdespite\tthe\tmany\tdifferent\tforces\tswirling around\tour\tego. The\thistorian\tShelby\tFoote\tobserved\tthat\t\u201cpower\tdoesn\u2019t\tso\tmuch\tcorrupt; that\u2019s\ttoo\tsimple.\tIt\tfragments,\tcloses\toptions,\tmesmerizes.\u201d\tThat\u2019s\twhat\tego does.\tIt\tclouds\tthe\tmind\tprecisely\twhen\tit\tneeds\tto\tbe\tclear.\tSobriety\tis\ta counterbalance,\ta\thangover\tcure\u2014or\tbetter,\ta\tprevention\tmethod. Other\tpoliticians\tare\tbold\tand\tcharismatic.\tBut\tas\tMerkel\tsupposedly\tsaid, \u201cYou\tcan\u2019t\tsolve\t.\t.\t.\ttasks\twith\tcharisma.\u201d\tShe\tis\trational.\tShe\tanalyzes.\tShe makes\tit\tabout\tthe\tsituation,\tnot\tabout\therself,\tas\tpeople\tin\tpower\toften\tdo.\tHer background\tin\tscience\tis\thelpful\there,\tsurely.\tPoliticians\tare\toften\tvain, obsessing\tabout\ttheir\timage.\tMerkel\tis\ttoo\tobjective\tfor\tthat.\tShe\tcares\tabout results\tand\tlittle\telse.\tA\tGerman\twriter\tobserved\tin\ta\ttribute\ton\ther\tfiftieth birthday\tthat\tunpretentiousness\tis\tMerkel\u2019s\tmain\tweapon. David\tHalberstam,\twriting\tabout\tthe\tPatriots\u2019\tcoach\tBill\tBelichick,\tobserved that\tthe\tman\twas\t\u201cnot\tonly\tin\tthe\tsteak\tbusiness,\the\thad\tcontempt\tfor\tsizzle.\u201d You\tcould\tsay\tthe\tsame\tabout\tMerkel.\tLeaders\tlike\tBelichick\tand\tMerkel\tknow that\tsteak\tis\twhat\twins\tgames\tand\tmoves\tnations\tforward.\tSizzle,\ton\tthe\tother hand,\tmakes\tit\tharder\tto\tmake\tthe\tright\tdecisions\u2014how\tto\tinteract\twith\tothers, who\tto\tpromote,\twhich\tplays\tto\trun,\twhat\tfeedback\tto\tlisten\tto,\twhere\tto\tcome down\ton\tan\tissue. Churchill\u2019s\tEurope\trequired\tone\ttype\tof\tleader.\tToday\u2019s\tinterconnected\tworld requires\tits\town.\tBecause\tthere\tis\tso\tmuch\tinformation\tto\tbe\tsorted\tthrough,\tso","much\tcompetition,\tso\tmuch\tchange,\twithout\ta\tclear\thead\t.\t.\t.\tall\tis\tlost. We\u2019re\tnot\ttalking\tabout\tabstinence\tfrom\tdrugs\tor\talcohol\tobviously,\tbut\tthere certainly\tis\tan\telement\tof\trestraint\tto\tegoless\tsobriety\u2014an\telimination\tof\tthe unnecessary\tand\tthe\tdestructive.\tNo\tmore\tobsessing\tabout\tyour\timage;\ttreating people\tbeneath\tyou\tor\tabove\tyou\twith\tcontempt;\tneeding\tfirst-class\ttrappings and\tthe\tstar\ttreatment;\traging,\tfighting,\tpreening,\tperforming,\tlording\tover, condescending,\tand\tmarveling\tat\tyour\town\tawesomeness\tor\tself-anointed importance. Sobriety\tis\tthe\tcounterweight\tthat\tmust\tbalance\tout\tsuccess.\tEspecially\tif things\tkeep\tgetting\tbetter\tand\tbetter. As\tJames\tBasford\tremarked,\t\u201cIt\trequires\ta\tstrong\tconstitution\tto\twithstand repeated\tattacks\tof\tprosperity.\u201d\tWell,\tthat\u2019s\twhere\twe\tare\tnow. There\u2019s\tan\told\tline\tabout\thow\tif\tyou\twant\tto\tlive\thappy,\tlive\thidden.\tIt\u2019s\ttrue. The\tproblem\tis,\tthat\tmeans\tthe\trest\tof\tus\tare\tdeprived\tof\treally\tgood\texamples. We\u2019re\tlucky\tto\tsee\tsomeone\tlike\tMerkel\tin\tthe\tpublic\teye,\tbecause\tshe\tis\tthe representative\tof\ta\tvery\tlarge,\tsilent\tmajority. As\thard\tas\tit\tmight\tbe\tto\tbelieve\tfrom\twhat\twe\tsee\tin\tthe\tmedia,\tthere actually\tare\tsome\tsuccessful\tpeople\twith\tmodest\tapartments.\tLike\tMerkel,\tthey have\tnormal\tprivate\tlives\twith\ttheir\tspouses\t(her\thusband\tskipped\ther\tfirst inauguration).\tThey\tlack\tartifice,\tthey\twear\tnormal\tclothes.\tMost\tsuccessful people\tare\tpeople\tyou\u2019ve\tnever\theard\tof.\tThey\twant\tit\tthat\tway. It\tkeeps\tthem\tsober.\tIt\thelps\tthem\tdo\ttheir\tjobs.","FOR\tWHAT\tOFTEN\tCOMES\tNEXT,\tEGO\tIS\tTHE\tENEMY\t.\t.\t. The\tevidence\tis\tin,\tand\tyou\tare\tthe\tverdict. \u2014ANNE\tLAMOTT H ere\tyou\tare\tat\tthe\tpinnacle.\tWhat\thave\tyou\tfound?\tJust\thow\ttough\tand tricky\tit\tis\tto\tmanage.\tYou\tthought\tit\twould\tget\teasier\twhen\tyou\tarrived; instead,\tit\u2019s\teven\tharder\u2014a\tdifferent\tanimal\tentirely.\tWhat\tyou\tfound\tis\tthat\tyou must\tmanage\tyourself\tin\torder\tto\tmaintain\tyour\tsuccess. The\tphilosopher\tAristotle\twas\tnot\tunfamiliar\twith\tthe\tworlds\tof\tego\tand power\tand\tempire.\tHis\tmost\tfamous\tpupil\twas\tAlexander\tthe\tGreat,\tand\tpartially through\tAristotle\u2019s\tteachings,\tthe\tyoung\tman\tconquered\tthe\tentire\tknown\tworld. Alexander\twas\tbrave\tand\tbrilliant\tand\toften\tgenerous\tand\twise.\tStill,\tit\u2019s\tclear that\the\tignored\tAristotle\u2019s\tmost\timportant\tlesson\u2014and\tthat\u2019s\tpartially\twhy\the died\tat\tage\tthirty-two,\tfar\tfrom\thome,\tlikely\tkilled\tby\this\town\tmen,\twho\thad finally\tsaid,\t\u201cEnough.\u201d It\u2019s\tnot\tthat\the\twas\twrong\tto\thave\tgreat\tambitions.\tAlexander\tjust\tnever grasped\tAristotle\u2019s\t\u201cgolden\tmean\u201d\u2014that\tis,\tthe\tmiddle\tground.\tRepeatedly, Aristotle\tspeaks\tof\tvirtue\tand\texcellence\tas\tpoints\talong\ta\tspectrum.\tCourage, for\tinstance,\tlies\tbetween\tcowardice\ton\tone\tend\tand\trecklessness\ton\tthe\tother. Generosity,\twhich\twe\tall\tadmire,\tmust\tstop\tshort\tof\teither\tprofligacy\tand parsimony\tin\torder\tto\tbe\tof\tany\tuse.\tWhere\tthe\tline\u2014this\tgolden\tmean\u2014is\tcan be\tdifficult\tto\ttell,\tbut\twithout\tfinding\tit,\twe\trisk\tdangerous\textremes.\tThis\tis why\tit\tis\tso\thard\tto\tbe\texcellent,\tAristotle\twrote.\t\u201cIn\teach\tcase,\tit\tis\thard\twork\tto find\tthe\tintermediate;\tfor\tinstance,\tnot\teveryone,\tbut\tonly\tone\twho\tknows,\tfinds the\tmidpoint\tin\ta\tcircle.\u201d We\tcan\tuse\tthe\tgolden\tmean\tto\tnavigate\tour\tego\tand\tour\tdesire\tto\tachieve. Endless\tambition\tis\teasy;\tanyone\tcan\tput\ttheir\tfoot\tdown\thard\ton\tthe\tgas. Complacency\tis\teasy\ttoo;\tit\u2019s\tjust\ta\tmatter\tof\ttaking\tthat\tfoot\toff\tthe\tgas.\tWe must\tavoid\twhat\tthe\tbusiness\tstrategist\tJim\tCollins\tterms\tthe\t\u201cundisciplined","pursuit\tof\tmore,\u201d\tas\twell\tas\tthe\tcomplacency\tthat\tcomes\twith\tplaudits.\tTo borrow\tfrom\tAristotle\tagain,\twhat\u2019s\tdifficult\tis\tto\tapply\tthe\tright\tamount\tof pressure,\tat\tthe\tright\ttime,\tin\tthe\tright\tway,\tfor\tthe\tright\tperiod\tof\ttime,\tin\tthe right\tcar,\tgoing\tin\tthe\tright\tdirection. If\twe\tdon\u2019t\tdo\tthis,\tthe\tconsequences\tcan\tbe\tdire. There\tis\ta\tline\tfrom\tNapoleon,\twho,\tlike\tAlexander,\tdied\tmiserably.\tHe\tsaid, \u201cMen\tof\tgreat\tambition\thave\tsought\thappiness\t.\t.\t.\tand\thave\tfound\tfame.\u201d\tWhat he\tmeans\tis\tthat\tbehind\tevery\tgoal\tis\tthe\tdrive\tto\tbe\thappy\tand\tfulfilled\u2014but when\tegotism\ttakes\thold,\twe\tlose\ttrack\tof\tour\tgoal\tand\tend\tup\tsomewhere\twe never\tintended.\tEmerson,\tin\this\tfamous\tessay\ton\tNapoleon,\ttakes\tpains\tto\tpoint out\tthat\tjust\ta\tfew\tyears\tafter\this\tdeath,\tEurope\twas\tessentially\texactly\tas\tit\twas before\tNapoleon\tbegan\this\tprecipitous\trise.\tAll\tthat\tdeath,\tthat\teffort,\tthat\tgreed, and\tthose\thonors\u2014for\twhat?\tFor\tbasically\tnothing.\tNapoleon,\the\twrote,\tquickly faded\taway,\tjust\tlike\tthe\tsmoke\tfrom\this\tartillery. Howard\tHughes\u2014despite\this\tcurrent\treputation\tas\tsome\tkind\tof\tbold maverick\u2014was\tnot\ta\thappy\tman,\tno\tmatter\thow\tawesome\this\tlife\tmay\tseem from\thistory\tor\tmovies.\tWhen\the\twas\tnear\tdeath,\tone\tof\this\taides\tsought\tto reassure\ta\tsuffering\tHughes.\t\u201cWhat\tan\tincredible\tlife\tyou\thave\tled,\u201d\tthe\taide said.\tHughes\tshook\this\thead\tand\treplied\twith\tthe\tsad,\temphatic\thonesty\tof someone\twhose\ttime\thas\tclearly\tcome,\t\u201cIf\tyou\thad\tever\tswapped\tplaces\tin\tlife with\tme,\tI\twould\tbe\twilling\tto\tbet\tthat\tyou\twould\thave\tdemanded\tto\tswap\tback before\tthe\tpassage\tof\tthe\tfirst\tweek.\u201d We\tdo\tnot\thave\tto\tfollow\tin\tthose\tfootsteps.\tWe\tknow\twhat\tdecisions\twe must\tmake\tto\tavoid\tthat\tignominious,\teven\tpathetic\tend:\tprotecting\tour\tsobriety, eschewing\tgreed\tand\tparanoia,\tstaying\thumble,\tretaining\tour\tsense\tof\tpurpose, connecting\tto\tthe\tlarger\tworld\taround\tus. Because\teven\tif\twe\tmanage\tourselves\twell,\tprosperity\tholds\tno\tguarantees. The\tworld\tconspires\tagainst\tus\tin\tmany\tways,\tand\tthe\tlaws\tof\tnature\tsay\tthat everything\tregresses\ttoward\tthe\tmean.\tIn\tsports,\tthe\tschedule\tgets\tharder\tafter\ta winning\tseason,\tthe\tbad\tteams\tget\tbetter\tdraft\tpicks,\tand\tthe\tsalary\tcap\tmakes\tit tough\tto\tkeep\ta\tteam\ttogether.\tIn\tlife,\ttaxes\tgo\tup\tthe\tmore\tyou\tmake,\tand\tthe more\tobligations\tsociety\tfoists\ton\tyou.\tThe\tmedia\tis\tharder\ton\tthose\tit\thas covered\tbefore.\tRumors\tand\tgossip\tare\tthe\tcost\tof\trenown:\tHe\u2019s\ta\tdrunk.\tShe\u2019s gay.\tHe\u2019s\ta\thypocrite.\tShe\u2019s\ta\tbitch.\tThe\tcrowd\troots\tfor\tthe\tunderdog,\tand\troots against\tthe\twinners. These\tare\tjust\tfacts\tof\tlife.\tWho\tcan\tafford\tto\tadd\tdenial\tto\tall\tthat?","Instead\tof\tletting\tpower\tmake\tus\tdelusional\tand\tinstead\tof\ttaking\twhat\twe have\tfor\tgranted,\twe\u2019d\tbe\tbetter\tto\tspend\tour\ttime\tpreparing\tfor\tthe\tshifts\tof\tfate that\tinevitably\toccur\tin\tlife.\tThat\tis,\tadversity,\tdifficulty,\tfailure. Who\tknows\u2014maybe\ta\tdownturn\tis\texactly\twhat\u2019s\tcoming\tnext.\tWorse, maybe\tyou\tcaused\tit.\tJust\tbecause\tyou\tdid\tsomething\tonce,\tdoesn\u2019t\tmean\tyou\u2019ll be\table\tto\tdo\tit\tsuccessfully\tforever. Reversals\tand\tregressions\tare\tas\tmuch\ta\tpart\tof\tthe\tcycle\tof\tlife\tas\tanything else. But\twe\tcan\tmanage\tthat\ttoo.","","FAILURE Here\twe\tare\texperiencing\tthe\ttrials\tendemic\tto\tany\tjourney.\tPerhaps\twe\u2019ve\tfailed,\tperhaps\tour\tgoal turned\tout\tto\tbe\tharder\tto\tachieve\tthan\tanticipated.\tNo\tone\tis\tpermanently\tsuccessful,\tand\tnot everyone\tfinds\tsuccess\ton\tthe\tfirst\tattempt.\tWe\tall\tdeal\twith\tsetbacks\talong\tthe\tway.\tEgo\tnot\tonly leaves\tus\tunprepared\tfor\tthese\tcircumstances,\tit\toften\tcontributed\tto\ttheir\toccurrence\tin\tthe\tfirst place.\tThe\tway\tthrough,\tthe\tway\tto\trise\tagain,\trequires\ta\treorientation\tand\tincreased\tself-awareness. We\tdon\u2019t\tneed\tpity\u2014our\town\tor\tanyone\telse\u2019s\u2014we\tneed\tpurpose,\tpoise,\tand\tpatience.","","It\tis\tbecause\tmankind\tare\tdisposed\tto\tsympathize\tmore\tentirely\twith\tour\tjoy\tthan\twith\tour sorrow,\tthat\twe\tmake\tparade\tof\tour\triches,\tand\tconceal\tour\tpoverty.\tNothing\tis\tso\tmortifying as\tto\tbe\tobliged\tto\texpose\tour\tdistress\tto\tthe\tview\tof\tthe\tpublic,\tand\tto\tfeel,\tthat\tthough\tour situation\tis\topen\tto\tthe\teyes\tof\tall\tmankind,\tno\tmortal\tconceives\tfor\tus\tthe\thalf\tof\twhat\twe suffer. \u2014ADAM\tSMITH F or\tthe\tfirst\thalf\tof\ther\tlife,\tKatharine\tGraham\tsaw\tpretty\tmuch\teverything\tgo right. Her\tfather,\tEugene\tMeyer,\twas\ta\tfinancial\tgenius\twho\tmade\ta\tfortune\tin\tthe stock\tmarket.\tHer\tmother\twas\ta\tbeautiful\tas\twell\tas\tbrilliant\tsocialite.\tAs\ta\tchild, Katharine\thad\tthe\tbest\tof\teverything:\tthe\tbest\tschools,\tthe\tbest\tteachers,\tbig houses,\tand\tservants\tto\twait\ton\ther. In\t1933,\ther\tfather\tbought\tthe\tWashington\tPost,\tthen\ta\tstruggling\tbut important\tnewspaper,\twhich\the\tbegan\tto\tturn\taround.\tThe\tonly\tchild\tto\texpress any\tserious\tinterest\tin\tit,\tKatharine\tinherited\tthe\tpaper\twhen\tshe\twas\tolder\tand handed\tover\tthe\tmanagement\tto\ther\tequally\timpressive\thusband,\tPhilip\tGraham. She\twas\tnot\tanother\tHoward\tHughes,\twho\tsquandered\ther\tfamily\u2019s\tfortune. She\twas\tnot\tanother\trich\tkid\twho\ttook\tthe\teasy\troad\tin\tlife\tbecause\tshe\tcould. But\tit\twas\ta\tcushy\tlife,\tno\tquestion\tabout\tit.\tShe\thad\tbeen,\tin\ther\twords,\tcontent to\tbe\tthe\ttail\tto\ther\thusband\u2019s\t(and\tparent\u2019s)\tkite. Then\tlife\ttook\ta\tturn.\tPhil\tGraham\u2019s\tbehavior\tbecame\tincreasingly\terratic.\tHe drank\theavily.\tHe\tmade\treckless\tbusiness\tdecisions\tand\tbought\tthings\tthey couldn\u2019t\tafford.\tHe\tbegan\thaving\taffairs.\tHe\tpublicly\thumiliated\this\twife\tin\tfront of\tnearly\teveryone\tthey\tknew.\tRich\tpeople\tproblems,\tright?\tIt\tturns\tout\tthat\the had\tsuffered\ta\tsevere\tmental\tbreakdown,\tand\tas\tKatharine\tattempted\tto\tnurse him\tback\tto\thealth,\the\tkilled\thimself\twith\ta\thunting\trifle\twhile\tshe\tnapped\tin\tthe next\troom. In\t1963,\tat\tforty-six\tyears\told,\tKatharine\tGraham,\ta\tmother\tof\tthree\twith\tno work\texperience,\tfound\therself\tin\tcharge\tof\tthe\tWashington\tPost\tCompany,\ta","vast\tcorporation\twith\tthousands\tof\temployees.\tShe\twas\tunprepared,\ttimid,\tand naive. Though\ttragic,\tthese\tevents\twere\tnot\texactly\ta\tcataclysmic\tfailure.\tGraham was\tstill\trich,\tstill\twhite,\tstill\tprivileged.\tStill,\tit\twas\tnot\twhat\tshe\tthought\tlife had\tplanned\tfor\ther.\tThat\u2019s\tthe\tpoint.\tFailure\tand\tadversity\tare\trelative\tand unique\tto\teach\tof\tus.\tAlmost\twithout\texception,\tthis\tis\twhat\tlife\tdoes:\tit\ttakes our\tplans\tand\tdashes\tthem\tto\tpieces.\tSometimes\tonce,\tsometimes\tlots\tof\ttimes. As\tthe\tfinancial\tphilosopher\tand\teconomist\tGeorge\tGoodman\tonce\tobserved, it\tis\tas\tif\t\u201cwe\tare\tat\ta\twonderful\tball\twhere\tthe\tchampagne\tsparkles\tin\tevery glass\tand\tsoft\tlaughter\tfalls\tupon\tthe\tsummer\tair.\tWe\tknow\tat\tsome\tmoment\tthe black\thorsemen\twill\tcome\tshattering\tthrough\tthe\tterrace\tdoors\twreaking vengeance\tand\tscattering\tthe\tsurvivors.\tThose\twho\tleave\tearly\tare\tsaved,\tbut\tthe ball\tis\tso\tsplendid\tno\tone\twants\tto\tleave\twhile\tthere\tis\tstill\ttime.\tSo\teverybody keeps\tasking\u2014what\ttime\tis\tit?\tBut\tnone\tof\tthe\tclocks\thave\thands.\u201d He\twas\tspeaking\tof\teconomic\tcrises,\talthough\the\tmay\tas\twell\thave\tbeen talking\tabout\twhere\tall\tof\tus\tfind\tourselves,\tnot\tjust\tonce\tin\tour\tlifetimes,\tbut often.\tThings\tare\tgoing\twell.\tPerhaps\twe\u2019re\taspiring\tto\tsome\tbig\tgoal.\tPerhaps we\u2019re\tfinally\tenjoying\tthe\tfruits\tof\tour\tlabors.\tAt\tany\tpoint,\tfate\tcan\tintervene. If\tsuccess\tis\tego\tintoxication,\tthen\tfailure\tcan\tbe\ta\tdevastating\tego\tblow\u2014 turning\tslips\tinto\tfalls\tand\tlittle\ttroubles\tinto\tgreat\tunravelings.\tIf\tego\tis\toften just\ta\tnasty\tside\teffect\tof\tgreat\tsuccess,\tit\tcan\tbe\tfatal\tduring\tfailure. We\thave\tmany\tnames\tfor\tthese\tproblems:\tSabotage.\tUnfairness.\tAdversity. Trials.\tTragedy.\tNo\tmatter\tthe\tlabel,\tit\u2019s\ta\ttrial.\tWe\tdon\u2019t\tlike\tit,\tand\tsome\tof\tus are\tsunk\tby\tit.\tOthers\tseem\tto\tbe\tbuilt\tto\tmake\tit\tthrough.\tIn\teither\tcase,\tit\u2019s\ta trial\teach\tperson\tmust\tendure. This\tfate\tis\tas\tmuch\twritten\tfor\tus\tas\tit\twas\twritten\tfive\tthousand\tyears\tago for\tthe\tyoung\tking\tin\tGilgamesh: He\twill\tface\ta\tbattle\the\tknows\tnot, he\twill\tride\ta\troad\the\tknows\tnot. That\u2019s\twhat\tcame\tto\tKatharine\tGraham.\tIt\tturned\tout\tthat\ttaking\tover\tthe paper\twas\tthe\tfirst\tin\ta\tseries\tof\ttrying\tand\twrenching\tevents\tthat\tlasted\tfor nearly\ttwo\tdecades. Thomas\tPaine,\tremarking\tabout\tGeorge\tWashington,\tonce\twrote\tthat\tthere\tis a\t\u201cnatural\tfirmness\tin\tsome\tminds\twhich\tcannot\tbe\tunlocked\tby\ttrifles,\tbut","which,\twhen\tunlocked,\tdiscovers\ta\tcabinet\tof\tfortitude.\u201d\tGraham\tseems\tto\thave possessed\ta\tsimilar\tcabinet. As\tshe\tsettled\tinto\ther\tleadership\tposition,\tGraham\tfound\tthat\tthe\tpaper\u2019s conservative\tboard\twas\ta\tconstant\tobstacle.\tThey\twere\tpatronizing\tand\trisk averse\tand\thad\theld\tthe\tcompany\tback.\tTo\tsucceed,\tshe\twould\thave\tto\tdevelop her\town\tcompass\tand\tnot\tdefer\tto\tothers\tthe\tway\tshe\talways\thad.\tIt\teventually became\tclear\tthat\tshe\tneeded\ta\tnew\texecutive\teditor.\tAgainst\tthe\tboard\u2019s\tadvice, she\treplaced\tthe\twell-liked\tgood\told\tboy\twith\tan\tunknown\tyoung\tupstart. Simple\tenough. The\tnext\tturn\tof\tthe\tscrew\twasn\u2019t.\tJust\tas\tthe\tcompany\twas\tfiling\tto\tgo public,\tthe\tPost\treceived\ta\tcollection\tof\tstolen\tgovernment\tdocuments\tthat editors\tasked\tGraham\tif\tthey\tcould\trun,\tdespite\ta\tcourt\torder\tpreventing\ttheir publication.\tShe\tconsulted\tthe\tcompany\u2019s\tlawyers.\tShe\tconsulted\tthe\tboard.\tAll advised\tagainst\tit\u2014fearing\tit\tcould\tsink\tthe\tIPO\tor\ttie\tthe\tcompany\tup\tin lawsuits\tfor\tyears.\tTorn,\tshe\tdecided\tto\tproceed\tand\tpublish\tthem\u2014a\tdecision with\tessentially\tno\tprecedent.\tShortly\tthereafter,\tthe\tpaper\u2019s\tinvestigation\tof\ta burglary\tat\tthe\tDemocratic\tNational\tCommittee\u2019s\theadquarters\u2014relying\ton\tan anonymous\tsource\u2014threatened\tto\tput\tthe\tcompany\tpermanently\tat\todds\twith\tthe White\tHouse\tand\tWashington\u2019s\tpowerful\telite\t(as\twell\tas\tjeopardizing\tthe government\tlicenses\tthey\tneeded\tfor\tthe\tTV\tstations\tthe\tPost\towned).\tAt\tone point,\tNixon\tloyalist\tand\tthe\tattorney\tgeneral\tof\tthe\tUnited\tStates\tJohn\tMitchell threatened\tthat\tGraham\thad\tso\toverreached\tthat\ther\t\u201ctit\u201d\twas\tgoing\tto\tbe \u201ccaught\tin\ta\tbig\tfat\twringer.\u201d\tAnother\taide\tbragged\tthat\tthe\tWhite\tHouse\twas now\tthinking\tabout\thow\tto\tscrew\tthe\tpaper\tover.\tPut\tyourself\tin\ther\tshoes:\tthe most\tpowerful\toffice\tin\tthe\tworld\texplicitly\tstrategizing,\t\u201cHow\tcan\twe\thurt\tthe Post\tthe\tmost?\u201d On\ttop\tof\tthat,\tthe\tPost\u2019s\tstock\tprice\twas\tless\tthan\tstellar.\tThe\tmarket\twas poor.\tIn\t1974,\tan\tinvestor\tbegan\taggressively\tbuying\tup\tshares\tin\tthe\tcompany. The\tboard\twas\tterrified.\tIt\tcould\tmean\ta\thostile\ttakeover.\tGraham\twas dispatched\tto\tdeal\twith\thim.\tThe\tfollowing\tyear,\tthe\tpaper\u2019s\tprinters\u2019\tunion began\ta\tvicious,\tprotracted\tstrike.\tAt\tone\tpoint,\tunion\tmembers\twore\tshirts\tthat said,\t\u201cPhil\tShot\tthe\tWrong\tGraham.\u201d\tDespite\u2014or\tperhaps\tbecause\tof\u2014these tactics,\tshe\tdecided\tto\tfight\tthe\tstrike.\tThey\tfought\tback.\tAt\tfour\to\u2019clock\tone morning\tcame\ta\ta\tfrantic\tcall:\tthe\tunion\thad\tsabotaged\tcompany\tmachinery, beaten\tup\tan\tinnocent\tstaffer,\tand\tthen\tset\tone\tof\tthe\tprinting\tpresses\ton\tfire. Typically,\tduring\tprinting\tstrikes\tcompetitors\twill\thelp\tfellow\tpapers\tout\twith","their\tprinting\tbut\tGraham\u2019s\tcompetitors\trefused,\tcosting\tthe\tPost\t$300,000\ta\tday in\tadvertising\trevenue. Then,\ta\tsuite\tof\tmajor\tinvestors\tbegan\tto\tsell\ttheir\tstock\tpositions\tin\tthe Washington\tPost\tCompany,\tostensibly\thaving\tlost\ttheir\tfaith\tin\tits\tprospects. Graham,\tpushed\tby\tthe\tactivist\tinvestor\tshe\u2019d\tmet\twith\tearlier,\tdecided\ther\tbest option\twas\tto\tspend\tan\tenormous\tamount\tof\tthe\tcompany\u2019s\tmoney\tto\tbuy\tback its\town\tshares\ton\tthe\tpublic\tmarkets\u2014a\tdangerous\tmove\tthat\talmost\tno\tone\twas doing\tat\tthe\ttime. That\u2019s\ta\tlist\tof\tproblems\texhausting\tto\tread\tabout\tlet\talone\tlive\tthrough.\tYet because\tof\tGraham\u2019s\tperseverance,\tit\tshook\tout\tbetter\tthan\tanyone\tcould\thave possibly\tpredicted. The\tleaked\tdocuments\tKatharine\tGraham\tpublished\tbecame\tknown\tas\tthe Pentagon\tPapers\tand\twere\tone\tof\tthe\tmost\timportant\tstories\tin\tthe\thistory\tof journalism.\tThe\tpaper\u2019s\tWatergate\treporting,\twhich\tso\tincensed\tthe\tNixon\tWhite House,\tchanged\tAmerican\thistory\tand\ttook\tdown\tan\tentire\tadministration.\tIt also\twon\tthe\tpaper\ta\tPulitzer\tPrize.\tThe\tinvestor\tothers\thad\tfeared\tturned\tout\tto be\ta\tyoung\tWarren\tBuffett,\twho\tbecame\ther\tbusiness\tmentor\tand\tan\tenormous advocate\tand\tsteward\tof\tthe\tcompany.\t(His\tsmall\tinvestments\tin\ther\tfamily\u2019s company\twould\tone\tday\tbe\tworth\thundreds\tof\tmillions.)\tShe\tprevailed\tin negotiations\twith\tthe\tunion\tand\tthe\tstrike\teventually\tended.\tHer\tmain\tcompetitor in\tWashington,\tthe\tone\tthat\thad\trefused\tto\tcome\tto\ther\taid,\tthe\tStar,\tsuddenly folded\tand\twas\tacquired\tby\tthe\tPost.\tHer\tstock\tbuybacks\u2014made\tcontrary\tnot only\tto\tbusiness\twisdom,\tbut\tthe\tjudgment\tof\tthe\tmarket\u2014made\tthe\tcompany billions\tof\tdollars. It\tturns\tout\tthat\tthe\tlong\thard\tslog\tshe\tendured,\tthe\tmistakes\tshe\tmade,\tthe repeated\tfailures,\tcrises,\tand\tattacks\twere\tall\tleading\tsomewhere.\tIf\tyou\u2019d invested\t$1\tin\tthe\tPost\u2019s\tIPO\tin\t1971,\tit\twould\tbe\tworth\t$89\tby\tthe\ttime\tGraham stepped\tdown\tin\t1993\u2014compared\tto\t$14\tfor\ther\tindustry\tand\t$5\tfor\tthe\tS&P 500.\tIt\tmakes\ther\tnot\tjust\tone\tof\tthe\tmost\tsuccessful\tfemale\tCEOs\tof\ther generation\tand\tthe\tfirst\tto\trun\ta\tFortune\t500\tcompany,\tbut\tone\tof\tthe\tbest\tCEOs ever,\tperiod. For\tsomeone\tborn\twith\ta\tsilver\tspoon\tin\ther\tmouth,\tthe\tfirst\tdecade\tand\ta\thalf was\twhat\tyou\u2019d\tcall\ta\tbaptism\tof\tfire.\tGraham\tfaced\tdifficulty\tafter\tdifficulty, difficulties\tthat\tshe\twasn\u2019t\treally\tequipped\tto\thandle,\tor\tso\tit\tseemed.\tThere\twere times\twhen\tit\tprobably\tfelt\tlike\tshe\tshould\thave\tjust\tsold\tthe\tdamn\tthing\tand enjoyed\ther\tmassive\twealth.","Graham\tdidn\u2019t\tcause\ther\thusband\u2019s\tsuicide,\tbut\tit\twas\tleft\tto\ther\tto\tcarry\ton without\thim.\tShe\tdidn\u2019t\task\tfor\tWatergate\tand\tthe\tPentagon\tPapers,\tbut\tit\tfell\ton her\tto\tnavigate\ttheir\tincendiary\tnature.\tWhile\tothers\twent\ton\tbuying\tand\tmerger sprees\tin\tthe\teighties,\tshe\tdidn\u2019t.\tShe\tdoubled\tdown\ton\therself\tand\ther\town company,\tdespite\tthe\tfact\tthat\tit\twas\ttreated\tas\ta\tweakling\tby\tWall\tStreet.\tShe could\thave\ttaken\tthe\teasy\tway\ta\thundred\ttimes,\tbut\tdid\tnot. At\tany\tgiven\tmoment,\tthere\tis\tthe\tchance\tof\tfailure\tor\tsetbacks.\tBill\tWalsh says,\t\u201cAlmost\talways,\tyour\troad\tto\tvictory\tgoes\tthrough\ta\tplace\tcalled\t\u2018failure.\u2019\u201d In\torder\tto\ttaste\tsuccess\tagain,\twe\u2019ve\tgot\tto\tunderstand\twhat\tled\tto\tthis\tmoment (or\tthese\tyears)\tof\tdifficulty,\twhat\twent\twrong\tand\twhy.\tWe\tmust\tdeal\twith\tthe situation\tin\torder\tto\tmove\tpast\tit.\tWe\u2019ll\tneed\tto\taccept\tit\tand\tto\tpush\tthrough\tit. Graham\twas\talone\tin\tmost\tof\tthis.\tShe\twas\tblindly\tfeeling\ther\tway\tthrough the\tdark,\ttrying\tto\tfigure\tout\ta\ttough\tsituation\tshe\tnever\texpected\tto\tbe\tin.\tShe\u2019s an\texample\tof\thow\tyou\tcan\tdo\tmost\teverything\tright\tand\tstill\tfind\tyourself\tin deep\tshit. We\tthink\tthat\tfailure\tonly\tcomes\tto\tegomaniacs\twho\twere\tbegging\tfor\tit. Nixon\tdeserved\tto\tfail;\tdid\tGraham?\tThe\treality\tis\tthat\twhile\tyes,\toften\tpeople set\tthemselves\tup\tto\tcrash,\tgood\tpeople\tfail\t(or\tother\tpeople\tfail\tthem)\tall\tthe time\ttoo.\tPeople\twho\thave\talready\tbeen\tthrough\ta\tlot\tfind\tthemselves\tstuck\twith more.\tLife\tisn\u2019t\tfair. Ego\tloves\tthis\tnotion,\tthe\tidea\tthat\tsomething\tis\t\u201cfair\u201d\tor\tnot.\tPsychologists call\tit\tnarcissistic\tinjury\twhen\twe\ttake\tpersonally\ttotally\tindifferent\tand objective\tevents.\tWe\tdo\tthat\twhen\tour\tsense\tof\tself\tis\tfragile\tand\tdependent\ton life\tgoing\tour\tway\tall\tthe\ttime.\tWhether\twhat\tyou\u2019re\tgoing\tthrough\tis\tyour\tfault or\tyour\tproblem\tdoesn\u2019t\tmatter,\tbecause\tit\u2019s\tyours\tto\tdeal\twith\tright\tnow. Graham\u2019s\tego\tdidn\u2019t\tcause\ther\tto\tfail,\tbut\tif\tshe\u2019d\thad\tone,\tit\tcertainly\twould have\tprevented\ther\tfrom\tsucceeding\tever\tagain.\tYou\tcould\tsay\tthat\tfailure always\tarrives\tuninvited,\tbut\tthrough\tour\tego,\tfar\ttoo\tmany\tof\tus\tallow\tit\tto\tstick around. What\tdid\tGraham\tneed\tthrough\tall\tthis?\tNot\tswagger.\tNot\tbluster.\tShe needed\tto\tbe\tstrong.\tShe\tneeded\tconfidence\tand\ta\twillingness\tto\tendure.\tA\tsense of\tright\tand\twrong.\tPurpose.\tIt\twasn\u2019t\tabout\ther.\tIt\twas\tabout\tpreserving\ther family\u2019s\tlegacy.\tProtecting\tthe\tpaper.\tDoing\ther\tjob. What\tabout\tyou?\tWill\tyour\tego\tbetray\tyou\twhen\tthings\tget\tdifficult?\tOr\tcan you\tproceed\twithout\tit? When\twe\tface\tdifficulty,\tparticularly\tpublic\tdifficulty\t(doubters,\tscandals, losses),\tour\tfriend\tthe\tego\twill\tshow\tits\ttrue\tcolors.","Absorbing\tthe\tnegative\tfeedback,\tego\tsays:\tI\tknew\tyou\tcouldn\u2019t\tdo\tit.\tWhy did\tyou\tever\ttry?\tIt\tclaims:\tThis\tisn\u2019t\tworth\tit.\tThis\tisn\u2019t\tfair.\tThis\tis\tsomebody else\u2019s\tproblem.\tWhy\tdon\u2019t\tyou\tcome\tup\twith\ta\tgood\texcuse\tand\twash\tyour\thands of\tthis?\tIt\ttells\tus\twe\tshouldn\u2019t\thave\tto\tput\tup\twith\tthis.\tIt\ttells\tus\tthat\twe\u2019re\tnot the\tproblem. That\tis,\tit\tadds\tself-injury\tto\tevery\tinjury\tyou\texperience. To\tparaphrase\tEpicurus,\tthe\tnarcissistically\tinclined\tlive\tin\tan\t\u201cunwalled city.\u201d\tA\tfragile\tsense\tof\tself\tis\tconstantly\tunder\tthreat.\tIllusions\tand accomplishments\tare\tnot\tdefenses,\tnot\twhen\tyou\u2019ve\tgot\tthe\tspecial\tsensitive antennae\ttrained\tto\treceive\t(and\tcreate)\tthe\tsignals\tthat\tchallenge\tyour precarious\tbalancing\tact. It\tis\ta\tmiserable\tway\tto\tlive. The\tyear\tbefore\tWalsh\ttook\tover\tthe\t49ers,\tthey\twent\t2\tand\t14.\tHis\tfirst\tyear as\thead\tcoach\tand\tgeneral\tmanager,\tthey\twent\t.\t.\t.\t2\tand\t14.\tCan\tyou\timagine\tthe disappointment?\tAll\tthe\tchanges,\tall\tthe\twork\tthat\twent\tinto\tthat\tfirst\tyear,\tand to\tend\tup\tin\tthe\texact\tsame\tspot\tas\tthe\tincompetent\tcoach\twho\tpreceded\tyou? That\u2019s\thow\tmost\tof\tus\twould\tthink.\tAnd\tthen\twe\u2019d\tprobably\tstart\tblaming\tother people. Walsh\trealized\the\t\u201chad\tto\tlook\tfor\tevidence\telsewhere\u201d\tthat\tit\twas\tturning around.\tFor\thim,\tit\twas\tin\thow\tthe\tgames\twere\tbeing\tplayed,\tthe\tgood\tdecisions and\tthe\tchanges\tthat\twere\tbeing\tmade\tinside\tthe\torganization.\tTwo\tseasons\tlater, they\twon\tthe\tSuper\tBowl\tand\tthen\tseveral\tmore\tafter\tthat.\tAt\trock\tbottom\tthose victories\tmust\thave\tfelt\tlike\ta\tlong\tway\toff,\twhich\tis\twhy\tyou\thave\tto\tbe\table\tto see\tpast\tand\tthrough. As\tGoethe\tonce\tobserved,\tthe\tgreat\tfailing\tis\t\u201cto\tsee\tyourself\tas\tmore\tthan you\tare\tand\tto\tvalue\tyourself\tat\tless\tthan\tyour\ttrue\tworth.\u201d\tA\tgood\tmetaphor might\tbe\tthe\tkind\tof\tstock\tbuybacks\tthat\tKatharine\tGraham\tmade\tin\tthe\tlate seventies\tand\teighties.\tStock\tbuybacks\tare\tcontroversial\u2014they\tusually\tcome from\ta\tcompany\tthat\tis\tstalled\tor\twhose\tgrowth\tis\tdecelerating.\tWith\tbuybacks, a\tCEO\tis\tmaking\ta\trather\tincredible\tstatement.\tShe\u2019s\tsaying:\tThe\tmarket\tis wrong.\tIt\u2019s\tvaluing\tour\tcompany\tso\tincorrectly,\tand\tclearly\thas\tso\tlittle\tidea where\twe\tare\theading,\tthat\twe\u2019re\tgoing\tto\tspend\tthe\tcompany\u2019s\tprecious\tcash\ton a\tbet\tthat\tthey\u2019re\twrong. Too\toften,\tdishonest\tor\tegotistical\tCEOs\tbuy\tback\tcompany\tstock\tbecause they\u2019re\tdelusional.\tOr\tbecause\tthey\twant\tto\tartificially\tinflate\tthe\tstock\tprice. Conversely,\ttimid\tor\tweak\tCEOs\twouldn\u2019t\teven\tconsider\tbetting\ton\tthemselves. In\tGraham\u2019s\tcase,\tshe\tmade\ta\tvalue\tjudgment;\twith\tBuffett\u2019s\thelp\tshe\tcould\tsee","objectively\tthat\tthe\tmarket\tdidn\u2019t\tappreciate\tthe\ttrue\tworth\tof\tthe\tcompany\u2019s assets.\tShe\tknew\tthat\tthe\treputational\thits,\tthe\tlearning\tcurve,\thad\tall\tcontributed to\ta\tsuppressed\tstock\tprice,\twhich\taside\tfrom\treducing\ther\tpersonal\twealth, created\ta\tmassive\topportunity\tfor\tthe\tcompany.\tOver\ta\tshort\tperiod,\tshe\twould buy\tnearly\t40\tpercent\tof\tthe\tcompany\u2019s\tshares\tat\ta\tfraction\tof\twhat\tthey\u2019d\tlater be\tworth.\tThe\tstock\tthat\tKatharine\tGraham\tbought\tfor\tapproximately\t$20\ta share\twould\tless\tthan\ta\tdecade\tlater\tbe\tworth\tmore\tthan\t$300. What\tboth\tGraham\tand\tWalsh\twere\tdoing\twas\tadhering\tto\ta\tset\tof\tinternal metrics\tthat\tallowed\tthem\tto\tevaluate\tand\tgauge\ttheir\tprogress\twhile\teveryone on\tthe\toutside\twas\ttoo\tdistracted\tby\tsupposed\tsigns\tof\tfailure\tor\tweakness. This\tis\twhat\tguides\tus\tthrough\tdifficulty. You\tmight\tnot\tget\tinto\tyour\tfirst\tchoice\tcollege.\tYou\tmight\tnot\tget\tpicked\tfor the\tproject\tor\tyou\tmight\tget\tpassed\tover\tfor\tthe\tpromotion.\tSomeone\tmight outbid\tyou\tfor\tthe\tjob,\tfor\tyour\tdream\thouse,\tfor\tthe\topportunity\tyou\tfeel everything\tdepends\ton.\tThis\tmight\thappen\ttomorrow,\tit\tmight\thappen\ttwenty- five\tyears\tfrom\tnow.\tIt\tcould\tlast\tfor\ttwo\tminutes\tor\tten\tyears.\tWe\tknow\tthat everyone\texperiences\tfailure\tand\tadversity,\tthat\twe\u2019re\tall\tsubject\tto\tthe\trules\tof gravity\tand\taverages.\tWhat\tdoes\tthat\tmean?\tIt\tmeans\twe\u2019ll\tface\tthem\ttoo. As\tPlutarch\tfinely\texpressed,\t\u201cThe\tfuture\tbears\tdown\tupon\teach\tone\tof\tus with\tall\tthe\thazards\tof\tthe\tunknown.\u201d\tThe\tonly\tway\tout\tis\tthrough. Humble\tand\tstrong\tpeople\tdon\u2019t\thave\tthe\tsame\ttrouble\twith\tthese\ttroubles that\tegotists\tdo.\tThere\tare\tfewer\tcomplaints\tand\tfar\tless\tself-immolation. Instead,\tthere\u2019s\tstoic\u2014even\tcheerful\u2014resilience.\tPity\tisn\u2019t\tnecessary.\tTheir identity\tisn\u2019t\tthreatened.\tThey\tcan\tget\tby\twithout\tconstant\tvalidation. This\tis\twhat\twe\u2019re\taspiring\tto\u2014much\tmore\tthan\tmere\tsuccess.\tWhat\tmatters is\tthat\twe\tcan\trespond\tto\twhat\tlife\tthrows\tat\tus. And\thow\twe\tmake\tit\tthrough.","ALIVE\tTIME\tOR\tDEAD\tTIME? Vivre\tsans\ttemps\tmort.\t(Live\twithout\twasted\ttime.) \u2014PARISIAN\tPOLITICAL\tSLOGAN M alcolm\tX\twas\ta\tcriminal.\tHe\twasn\u2019t\tMalcolm\tX\tat\tthe\ttime\u2014they\tcalled him\tDetroit\tRed\tand\the\twas\ta\tcriminal\topportunist\twho\tdid\ta\tlittle\tbit\tof everything.\tHe\tran\tnumbers.\tHe\tsold\tdrugs.\tHe\tworked\tas\ta\tpimp.\tThen\the moved\tup\tto\tarmed\trobbery.\tHe\thad\this\town\tburglary\tgang,\twhich\the\truled\tover with\ta\tcombination\tof\tintimidation\tand\tboldness\u2014exploiting\tthe\tfact\tthat\the\tdid not\tseem\tafraid\tto\tkill\tor\tdie. Then,\tfinally,\the\twas\tarrested\ttrying\tto\tfence\tan\texpensive\twatch\the\u2019d\tstolen. He\twas\tcarrying\ta\tgun\tat\tthe\ttime,\tthough\tto\this\tcredit\the\tmade\tno\tmove\tto\tfight the\tofficers\twho\thad\ttrapped\thim.\tIn\this\tapartment,\tthey\tfound\tjewelry,\tfurs,\tan arsenal\tof\tguns,\tand\tall\this\tburglary\ttools. He\tgot\tten\tyears.\tIt\twas\tFebruary\t1946.\tHe\twas\tbarely\ttwenty-one\tyears\told. Even\taccounting\tfor\tthe\tshameful\tAmerican\tracism\tand\twhatever\tsystematic legal\tinjustices\texisted\tat\tthe\ttime,\tMalcolm\tX\twas\tguilty.\tHe\tdeserved\tto\tgo\tto jail.\tWho\tknows\twho\telse\the\twould\thave\thurt\tor\tkilled\thad\the\tcontinued\this escalating\tlife\tof\tcrime? When\tyour\tactions\tland\tyou\ta\tlengthy\tprison\tsentence\u2014rightly\ttried\tand convicted\u2014something\thas\tgone\twrong.\tYou\u2019ve\tfailed\tnot\tonly\tyourself,\tbut\tthe basic\tstandards\tof\tsociety\tand\tmorality.\tThat\twas\tthe\tcase\twith\tMalcolm. So\tthere\the\twas\tin\tprison.\tA\tnumber.\tA\tbody\twith\troughly\ta\tdecade\tto\tsit\tin\ta cage. He\tfaced\twhat\tRobert\tGreene\u2014a\tman\twho\tsixty\tyears\tlater\twould\tfind\this wildly\tpopular\tbooks\tbanned\tin\tmany\tfederal\tprisons\u2014calls\tan\t\u201cAlive\tTime\tor Dead\tTime\u201d\tscenario.\tHow\twould\tthe\tseven\tyears\tultimately\tplay\tout?\tWhat would\tMalcolm\tdo\twith\tthis\ttime?","According\tto\tGreene,\tthere\tare\ttwo\ttypes\tof\ttime\tin\tour\tlives:\tdead\ttime, when\tpeople\tare\tpassive\tand\twaiting,\tand\talive\ttime,\twhen\tpeople\tare\tlearning and\tacting\tand\tutilizing\tevery\tsecond.\tEvery\tmoment\tof\tfailure,\tevery\tmoment or\tsituation\tthat\twe\tdid\tnot\tdeliberately\tchoose\tor\tcontrol,\tpresents\tthis\tchoice: Alive\ttime.\tDead\ttime. Which\twill\tit\tbe? Malcolm\tchose\talive\ttime.\tHe\tbegan\tto\tlearn.\tHe\texplored\treligion.\tHe\ttaught himself\tto\tbe\ta\treader\tby\tchecking\tout\ta\tpencil\tand\tthe\tdictionary\tfrom\tthe prison\tlibrary\tand\tnot\tonly\tconsumed\tit\tfrom\tstart\tto\tfinish,\tbut\tcopied\tit\tdown longhand\tfrom\tcover\tto\tcover.\tAll\tthese\twords\the\u2019d\tnever\tknown\texisted\tbefore were\ttransferred\tto\this\tbrain. As\the\tsaid\tlater,\t\u201cFrom\tthen\tuntil\tI\tleft\tthat\tprison,\tin\tevery\tfree\tmoment\tI had,\tif\tI\twas\tnot\treading\tin\tthe\tlibrary,\tI\twas\treading\tin\tmy\tbunk.\u201d\tHe\tread history,\the\tread\tsociology,\the\tread\tabout\treligion,\the\tread\tthe\tclassics,\the\tread philosophers\tlike\tKant\tand\tSpinoza.\tLater,\ta\treporter\tasked\tMalcolm,\t\u201cWhat\u2019s your\talma\tmater?\u201d\tHis\tone\tword\tanswer:\t\u201cBooks.\u201d\tPrison\twas\this\tcollege.\tHe transcended\tconfinement\tthrough\tthe\tpages\the\tabsorbed.\tHe\treflected\tthat months\tpassed\twithout\this\teven\tthinking\tabout\tbeing\tdetained\tagainst\this\twill. He\thad\t\u201cnever\tbeen\tso\ttruly\tfree\tin\this\tlife.\u201d Most\tpeople\tknow\twhat\tMalcolm\tX\tdid\tafter\the\tgot\tout\tof\tprison,\tbut\tthey don\u2019t\trealize\tor\tunderstand\thow\tprison\tmade\tthat\tpossible.\tHow\ta\tmix\tof acceptance,\thumility,\tand\tstrength\tpowered\tthe\ttransformation.\tThey\talso\taren\u2019t aware\tof\thow\tcommon\tthis\tis\tin\thistory,\thow\tmany\tfigures\ttook\tseemingly terrible\tsituations\u2014a\tprison\tsentence,\tan\texile,\ta\tbear\tmarket\tor\tdepression, military\tconscription,\teven\tbeing\tsent\tto\ta\tconcentration\tcamp\u2014and\tthrough their\tattitude\tand\tapproach,\tturned\tthose\tcircumstances\tinto\tfuel\tfor\ttheir\tunique greatness. Francis\tScott\tKey\twrote\tthe\tpoem\tthat\tbecame\tthe\tnational\tanthem\tof\tthe United\tStates\twhile\ttrapped\ton\ta\tship\tduring\ta\tprisoner\texchange\tin\tthe\tWar\tof 1812.\tViktor\tFrankl\trefined\this\tpsychologies\tof\tmeaning\tand\tsuffering\tduring\this ordeal\tin\tthree\tNazi\tconcentration\tcamps. Not\tthat\tthese\topportunities\talways\tcome\tin\tsuch\tserious\tsituations.\tThe author\tIan\tFleming\twas\ton\tbed\trest\tand,\tper\tdoctors\u2019\torders,\tforbidden\tfrom using\ta\ttypewriter.\tThey\twere\tworried\the\u2019d\texert\thimself\tby\twriting\tanother Bond\tnovel.\tSo\the\tcreated\tChitty\tChitty\tBang\tBang\tby\thand\tinstead.\tWalt Disney\tmade\this\tdecision\tto\tbecome\ta\tcartoonist\twhile\tlaid\tup\tafter\tstepping\ton a\trusty\tnail.","Yes,\tit\twould\tfeel\tmuch\tbetter\tin\tthe\tmoment\tto\tbe\tangry,\tto\tbe\taggrieved,\tto be\tdepressed\tor\theartbroken.\tWhen\tinjustice\tor\tthe\tcapriciousness\tof\tfate\tare inflicted\ton\tsomeone,\tthe\tnormal\treaction\tis\tto\tyell,\tto\tfight\tback,\tto\tresist.\tYou know\tthe\tfeeling:\tI\tdon\u2019t\twant\tthis.\tI\twant\t______.\tI\twant\tit\tmy\tway.\tThis\tis shortsighted. Think\tof\twhat\tyou\thave\tbeen\tputting\toff.\tIssues\tyou\tdeclined\tto\tdeal\twith. Systemic\tproblems\tthat\tfelt\ttoo\toverwhelming\tto\taddress.\tDead\ttime\tis\trevived when\twe\tuse\tit\tas\tan\topportunity\tto\tdo\twhat\twe\u2019ve\tlong\tneeded\tto\tdo. As\tthey\tsay,\tthis\tmoment\tis\tnot\tyour\tlife.\tBut\tit\tis\ta\tmoment\tin\tyour\tlife.\tHow will\tyou\tuse\tit? Malcolm\tcould\thave\tdoubled\tdown\ton\tthe\tlife\tthat\tbrought\thim\tto\tprison. Dead\ttime\tisn\u2019t\tonly\tdead\tbecause\tof\tsloth\tor\tcomplacency.\tHe\tcould\thave\tspent those\tyears\tbecoming\ta\tbetter\tcriminal,\tstrengthening\this\tcontacts,\tor\tplanning his\tnext\tscore,\tbut\tit\tstill\twould\thave\tbeen\tdead\ttime.\tHe\tmight\thave\tfelt\talive doing\tit,\teven\tas\the\twas\tslowly\tkilling\thimself. \u201cMany\ta\tserious\tthinker\thas\tbeen\tproduced\tin\tprisons,\u201d\tas\tRobert\tGreene\tput it,\t\u201cwhere\twe\thave\tnothing\tto\tdo\tbut\tthink.\u201d\tYet\tsadly,\tprisons\u2014in\ttheir\tliteral and\tfigurative\tforms\u2014have\tproduced\tfar\tmore\tdegenerates,\tlosers,\tand\tne\u2019er-do- wells.\tInmates\tmight\thave\thad\tnothing\tto\tdo\tbut\tthink;\tit\u2019s\tjust\tthat\twhat\tthey chose\tto\tthink\tabout\tmade\tthem\tworse\tand\tnot\tbetter. That\u2019s\twhat\tso\tmany\tof\tus\tdo\twhen\twe\tfail\tor\tget\tourselves\tinto\ttrouble. Lacking\tthe\tability\tto\texamine\tourselves,\twe\treinvest\tour\tenergy\tinto\texactly\tthe patterns\tof\tbehavior\tthat\tcaused\tour\tproblems\tto\tbegin\twith. It\tcomes\tin\tmany\tforms.\tIdly\tdreaming\tabout\tthe\tfuture.\tPlotting\tour\trevenge. Finding\trefuge\tin\tdistraction.\tRefusing\tto\tconsider\tthat\tour\tchoices\tare\ta reflection\tof\tour\tcharacter.\tWe\u2019d\trather\tdo\tbasically\tanything\telse. But\twhat\tif\twe\tsaid:\tThis\tis\tan\topportunity\tfor\tme.\tI\tam\tusing\tit\tfor\tmy purposes.\tI\twill\tnot\tlet\tthis\tbe\tdead\ttime\tfor\tme. The\tdead\ttime\twas\twhen\twe\twere\tcontrolled\tby\tego.\tNow\u2014now\twe\tcan\tlive. Who\tknows\twhat\tyou\u2019re\tcurrently\tdoing.\tHopefully\tit\u2019s\tnot\ta\tprison\tterm, even\tif\tit\tmight\tfeel\tlike\tit.\tMaybe\tyou\u2019re\tsitting\tin\ta\tremedial\thigh\tschool\tclass, maybe\tyou\u2019re\ton\thold,\tmaybe\tit\u2019s\ta\ttrial\tseparation,\tmaybe\tyou\u2019re\tmaking smoothies\twhile\tyou\tsave\tup\tmoney,\tmaybe\tyou\u2019re\tstuck\twaiting\tout\ta\tcontract or\ta\ttour\tof\tduty.\tMaybe\tthis\tsituation\tis\tone\ttotally\tof\tyour\town\tmaking,\tor perhaps\tit\u2019s\tjust\tbad\tluck. In\tlife,\twe\tall\tget\tstuck\twith\tdead\ttime.\tIts\toccurrence\tisn\u2019t\tin\tour\tcontrol.\tIts use,\ton\tthe\tother\thand,\tis.","As\tBooker\tT.\tWashington\tmost\tfamously\tput\tit,\t\u201cCast\tdown\tyour\tbucket where\tyou\tare.\u201d\tMake\tuse\tof\twhat\u2019s\taround\tyou.\tDon\u2019t\tlet\tstubbornness\tmake\ta bad\tsituation\tworse.","THE\tEFFORT\tIS\tENOUGH What\tmatters\tto\tan\tactive\tman\tis\tto\tdo\tthe\tright\tthing;\twhether\tthe\tright\tthing\tcomes\tto\tpass should\tnot\tbother\thim. \u2014GOETHE B elisarius\tis\tone\tof\tthe\tgreatest\tyet\tunknown\tmilitary\tgenerals\tin\tall\tof history.\tHis\tname\thas\tbeen\tso\tobscured\tand\tforgotten\tby\thistory\tthat\the makes\tthe\tunderappreciated\tGeneral\tMarshall\tseem\tpositively\tfamous.\tAt\tleast they\tnamed\tthe\tMarshall\tPlan\tafter\tGeorge. As\tRome\u2019s\thighest-ranking\tcommander\tunder\tthe\tByzantine\temperor Justinian,\tBelisarius\tsaved\tWestern\tcivilization\ton\tat\tleast\tthree\toccasions.\tAs Rome\tcollapsed\tand\tthe\tseat\tof\tthe\tempire\tmoved\tto\tConstantinople,\tBelisarius was\tthe\tonly\tbright\tlight\tin\ta\tdark\ttime\tfor\tChristianity. He\twon\tbrilliant\tvictories\tat\tDara,\tCarthage,\tNaples,\tSicily,\tand Constantinople.\tWith\tjust\ta\thandful\tof\tbodyguards\tagainst\ta\tcrowd\tof\ttens\tof thousands,\tBelisarius\tsaved\tthe\tthrone\twhen\tan\tuprising\thad\tgrown\tso\triotous that\tthe\temperor\tmade\tplans\tto\tabdicate.\tHe\treclaimed\tfar-flung\tterritories\tthat had\tbeen\tlost\tfor\tyears\tdespite\tbeing\tundermanned\tand\tdeprived\tof\tresources. He\trecaptured\tand\tdefended\tRome\tfor\tthe\tfirst\ttime\tsince\tthe\tbarbarians\thad sacked\tand\ttaken\tit.\tAll\tof\tthis\tbefore\the\twas\tforty. His\tthanks?\tHe\twas\tnot\tgiven\tpublic\ttriumphs.\tInstead,\the\twas\trepeatedly placed\tunder\tsuspicion\tby\tthe\tparanoid\temperor\the\tserved,\tJustinian.\tHis victories\tand\tsacrifices\twere\tundone\twith\tfoolish\ttreaties\tand\tbad\tfaith.\tHis personal\thistorian,\tProcopius,\twas\tcorrupted\tby\tJustinian\tto\ttarnish\tthe\tman\u2019s image\tand\tlegacy.\tLater,\the\twas\trelieved\tof\tcommand.\tHis\tonly\tremaining\ttitle was\tthe\tdeliberately\thumiliating\t\u201cCommander\tof\tthe\tRoyal\tStable.\u201d\tOh,\tand\tat the\tend\tof\this\tillustrious\tcareer,\tBelisarius\twas\tstripped\tof\this\twealth,\tand according\tto\tthe\tlegend,\tblinded,\tand\tforced\tto\tbeg\tin\tthe\tstreets\tto\tsurvive.","Historians,\tscholars,\tand\tartists\thave\tlamented\tand\targued\tabout\tthis treatment\tfor\tcenturies.\tLike\tall\tfair-minded\tpeople,\tthey\u2019re\toutraged\tat\tthe stupidity,\tthe\tungratefulness,\tand\tinjustice\tthat\tthis\tgreat\tand\tunusual\tman\twas subjected\tto. The\tone\tperson\twe\tdon\u2019t\thear\tcomplaining\tabout\tany\tof\tthis?\tNot\tat\tthe\ttime, not\tat\tthe\tend\tof\this\tlife,\tnot\teven\tin\tprivate\tletters:\tBelisarius\thimself. Ironically,\the\tprobably\tcould\thave\ttaken\tthe\tthrone\ton\tnumerous\toccasions, though\tit\tappears\the\twas\tnever\teven\ttempted.\tWhile\tthe\tEmperor\tJustinian\tfell prey\tto\tall\tthe\tvices\tof\tabsolute\tpower\u2014control,\tparanoia,\tselfishness,\tgreed\u2014 we\tsee\thardly\ta\ttrace\tof\tthem\tin\tBelisarius. In\this\teyes,\the\twas\tjust\tdoing\this\tjob\u2014one\the\tbelieved\twas\this\tsacred\tduty. He\tknew\tthat\the\tdid\tit\twell.\tHe\tknew\the\thad\tdone\twhat\twas\tright.\tThat\twas enough. In\tlife,\tthere\twill\tbe\ttimes\twhen\twe\tdo\teverything\tright,\tperhaps\teven perfectly.\tYet\tthe\tresults\twill\tsomehow\tbe\tnegative:\tfailure,\tdisrespect,\tjealousy, or\teven\ta\tresounding\tyawn\tfrom\tthe\tworld. Depending\ton\twhat\tmotivates\tus,\tthis\tresponse\tcan\tbe\tcrushing.\tIf\tego\tholds sway,\twe\u2019ll\taccept\tnothing\tless\tthan\tfull\tappreciation. A\tdangerous\tattitude\tbecause\twhen\tsomeone\tworks\ton\ta\tproject\u2014whether\tit\u2019s a\tbook\tor\ta\tbusiness\tor\totherwise\u2014at\ta\tcertain\tpoint,\tthat\tthing\tleaves\ttheir hands\tand\tenters\tthe\trealm\tof\tthe\tworld.\tIt\tis\tjudged,\treceived,\tand\tacted\ton\tby other\tpeople.\tIt\tstops\tbeing\tsomething\the\tcontrols\tand\tit\tdepends\ton\tthem. Belisarius\tcould\twin\this\tbattles.\tHe\tcould\tlead\this\tmen.\tHe\tcould\tdetermine his\tpersonal\tethics.\tHe\tcould\tnot\tcontrol\twhether\this\twork\twas\tappreciated\tor whether\tit\taroused\tsuspicion.\tHe\thad\tno\tability\tto\tcontrol\twhether\ta\tpowerful dictator\twould\ttreat\thim\twell. This\treality\trings\tessentially\ttrue\tfor\teveryone\tin\tevery\tkind\tof\tlife.\tWhat\twas so\tspecial\tabout\tBelisarius\twas\tthat\the\taccepted\tthe\tbargain.\tDoing\tthe\tright thing\twas\tenough.\tServing\this\tcountry,\this\tGod,\tand\tdoing\this\tduty\tfaithfully was\tall\tthat\tmattered.\tAny\tadversity\tcould\tbe\tendured\tand\tany\trewards\twere considered\textra. Which\tis\tgood,\tbecause\tnot\tonly\twas\the\toften\tnot\trewarded\tfor\tthe\tgood\the did,\the\twas\tpunished\tfor\tit.\tThat\tseems\tgalling\tat\tfirst.\tIndignation\tis\tthe\treaction we\u2019d\thave\tif\tit\thappened\tto\tus\tor\tsomeone\twe\tknow.\tWhat\twas\this\talternative? Should\the\thave\tdone\tthe\twrong\tthing\tinstead? We\tare\tall\tfaced\twith\tthis\tsame\tchallenge\tin\tthe\tpursuit\tof\tour\town\tgoals: Will\twe\twork\thard\tfor\tsomething\tthat\tcan\tbe\ttaken\taway\tfrom\tus?\tWill\twe\tinvest","time\tand\tenergy\teven\tif\tan\toutcome\tis\tnot\tguaranteed?\tWith\tthe\tright\tmotives we\u2019re\twilling\tto\tproceed.\tWith\tego,\twe\u2019re\tnot. We\thave\tonly\tminimal\tcontrol\tover\tthe\trewards\tfor\tour\twork\tand\teffort\u2014 other\tpeople\u2019s\tvalidation,\trecognition,\trewards.\tSo\twhat\tare\twe\tgoing\tto\tdo?\tNot be\tkind,\tnot\twork\thard,\tnot\tproduce,\tbecause\tthere\tis\ta\tchance\tit\twouldn\u2019t\tbe reciprocated?\tC\u2019mon. Think\tof\tall\tthe\tactivists\twho\twill\tfind\tthat\tthey\tcan\tonly\tadvance\ttheir\tcause so\tfar.\tThe\tleaders\twho\tare\tassassinated\tbefore\ttheir\twork\tis\tdone.\tThe\tinventors whose\tideas\tlanguish\t\u201cahead\tof\ttheir\ttime.\u201d\tAccording\tto\tsociety\u2019s\tmain\tmetrics, these\tpeople\twere\tnot\trewarded\tfor\ttheir\twork.\tShould\tthey\thave\tnot\tdone\tit? Yet\tin\tego,\tevery\tone\tof\tus\thas\tconsidered\tdoing\tprecisely\tthat. If\tthat\tis\tyour\tattitude,\thow\tdo\tyou\tintend\tto\tendure\ttough\ttimes?\tWhat\tif you\u2019re\tahead\tof\tthe\ttimes?\tWhat\tif\tthe\tmarket\tfavors\tsome\tbogus\ttrend?\tWhat\tif your\tboss\tor\tyour\tclients\tdon\u2019t\tunderstand? It\u2019s\tfar\tbetter\twhen\tdoing\tgood\twork\tis\tsufficient.\tIn\tother\twords,\tthe\tless attached\twe\tare\tto\toutcomes\tthe\tbetter.\tWhen\tfulfilling\tour\town\tstandards\tis what\tfills\tus\twith\tpride\tand\tself-respect.\tWhen\tthe\teffort\u2014not\tthe\tresults,\tgood or\tbad\u2014is\tenough. With\tego,\tthis\tis\tnot\tnearly\tsufficient.\tNo,\twe\tneed\tto\tbe\trecognized.\tWe\tneed to\tbe\tcompensated.\tEspecially\tproblematic\tis\tthe\tfact\tthat,\toften,\twe\tget\tthat.\tWe are\tpraised,\twe\tare\tpaid,\tand\twe\tstart\tto\tassume\tthat\tthe\ttwo\tthings\talways\tgo together.\tThe\t\u201cexpectation\thangover\u201d\tinevitably\tensues. There\twas\tan\tunusual\tencounter\tbetween\tAlexander\tthe\tGreat\tand\tthe\tfamous Cynic\tphilosopher\tDiogenes.\tAllegedly,\tAlexander\tapproached\tDiogenes,\twho was\tlying\tdown,\tenjoying\tthe\tsummer\tair,\tand\tstood\tover\thim\tand\tasked\twhat he,\tthe\tmost\tpowerful\tman\tin\tthe\tworld,\tmight\tbe\table\tto\tdo\tfor\tthis\tnotoriously poor\tman.\tDiogenes\tcould\thave\tasked\tfor\tanything.\tWhat\the\trequested\twas\tepic: \u201cStop\tblocking\tmy\tsun.\u201d\tEven\ttwo\tthousand\tyears\tlater\twe\tcan\tfeel\texactly where\tin\tthe\tsolar\tplexus\tthat\tmust\thave\thit\tAlexander,\ta\tman\twho\talways wanted\tto\tprove\thow\timportant\the\twas.\tAs\tthe\tauthor\tRobert\tLouis\tStevenson later\tobserved\tabout\tthis\tmeeting,\t\u201cIt\tis\ta\tsore\tthing\tto\thave\tlabored\talong\tand scaled\tarduous\thilltops,\tand\twhen\tall\tis\tdone,\tfind\thumanity\tindifferent\tto\tyour achievement.\u201d Well,\tget\tready\tfor\tit.\tIt\twill\thappen.\tMaybe\tyour\tparents\twill\tnever\tbe impressed.\tMaybe\tyour\tgirlfriend\twon\u2019t\tcare.\tMaybe\tthe\tinvestor\twon\u2019t\tsee\tthe numbers.\tMaybe\tthe\taudience\twon\u2019t\tclap.\tBut\twe\thave\tto\tbe\table\tto\tpush through.\tWe\tcan\u2019t\tlet\tthat\tbe\twhat\tmotivates\tus.","Belisarius\thad\tone\tlast\trun.\tHe\twas\tfound\tinnocent\tof\tthe\tcharges\tand\this honors\trestored\u2014just\tin\ttime\tto\tsave\tthe\tempire\tas\ta\twhite-haired\told\tman. Except\tno,\tlife\tis\tnot\ta\tfairy\ttale.\tHe\twas\tagain\twrongly\tsuspected\tof\tplotting against\tthe\temperor.\tIn\tthe\tfamous\tLongfellow\tpoem\tabout\tour\tpoor\tgeneral,\tat the\tend\tof\this\tlife\the\tis\timpoverished\tand\tdisabled.\tYet\the\tconcludes\twith\tgreat strength: This,\ttoo,\tcan\tbear;\u2014I\tstill Am\tBelisarius! You\twill\tbe\tunappreciated.\tYou\twill\tbe\tsabotaged.\tYou\twill\texperience surprising\tfailures.\tYour\texpectations\twill\tnot\tbe\tmet.\tYou\twill\tlose.\tYou\twill fail. How\tdo\tyou\tcarry\ton\tthen?\tHow\tdo\tyou\ttake\tpride\tin\tyourself\tand\tyour work?\tJohn\tWooden\u2019s\tadvice\tto\this\tplayers\tsays\tit:\tChange\tthe\tdefinition\tof success.\t\u201cSuccess\tis\tpeace\tof\tmind,\twhich\tis\ta\tdirect\tresult\tof\tself-satisfaction\tin knowing\tyou\tmade\tthe\teffort\tto\tdo\tyour\tbest\tto\tbecome\tthe\tbest\tthat\tyou\tare capable\tof\tbecoming.\u201d\t\u201cAmbition,\u201d\tMarcus\tAurelius\treminded\thimself,\t\u201cmeans tying\tyour\twell-being\tto\twhat\tother\tpeople\tsay\tor\tdo\t.\t.\t.\tSanity\tmeans\ttying\tit\tto your\town\tactions.\u201d Do\tyour\twork.\tDo\tit\twell.\tThen\t\u201clet\tgo\tand\tlet\tGod.\u201c\tThat\u2019s\tall\tthere\tneeds\tto be. Recognition\tand\trewards\u2014those\tare\tjust\textra.\tRejection,\tthat\u2019s\ton\tthem,\tnot on\tus. John\tKennedy\tToole\u2019s\tgreat\tbook\tA\tConfederacy\tof\tDunces\twas\tuniversally turned\tdown\tby\tpublishers,\tnews\tthat\tso\tbroke\this\theart\tthat\the\tlater\tcommitted suicide\tin\this\tcar\ton\tan\tempty\troad\tin\tBiloxi,\tMississippi.\tAfter\this\tdeath,\this mother\tdiscovered\tthe\tbook,\tadvocated\ton\tits\tbehalf\tuntil\tit\twas\tpublished,\tand\tit eventually\twon\tthe\tPulitzer\tPrize. Think\tabout\tthat\tfor\ta\tsecond.\tWhat\tchanged\tbetween\tthose\tsubmissions? Nothing.\tThe\tbook\twas\tthe\tsame.\tIt\twas\tequally\tgreat\twhen\tToole\thad\tit\tin manuscript\tform\tand\thad\tfought\twith\teditors\tabout\tit\tas\tit\twas\twhen\tthe\tbook was\tpublished,\tsold\tcopies,\tand\twon\tawards.\tIf\tonly\the\tcould\thave\trealized\tthis, it\twould\thave\tsaved\thim\tso\tmuch\theartbreak.\tHe\tcouldn\u2019t,\tbut\tfrom\this\tpainful example\twe\tcan\tat\tleast\tsee\thow\tarbitrary\tmany\tof\tthe\tbreaks\tin\tlife\tare. This\tis\twhy\twe\tcan\u2019t\tlet\texternals\tdetermine\twhether\tsomething\twas\tworth\tit or\tnot.\tIt\u2019s\ton\tus.","The\tworld\tis,\tafter\tall,\tindifferent\tto\twhat\twe\thumans\t\u201cwant.\u201d\tIf\twe\tpersist\tin wanting,\tin\tneeding,\twe\tare\tsimply\tsetting\tourselves\tup\tfor\tresentment\tor\tworse. Doing\tthe\twork\tis\tenough.","FIGHT\tCLUB\tMOMENTS If\tyou\tshut\tup\ttruth\tand\tbury\tit\tunder\tthe\tground,\tit\twill\tbut\tgrow,\tand\tgather\tto\titself\tsuch explosive\tpower\tthat\tthe\tday\tit\tbursts\tthrough\tit\twill\tblow\tup\teverything\tin\tits\tway. \u2014EMILE\tZOLA T here\tis\thardly\tthe\tspace\tto\tlist\tall\tthe\tsuccessful\tpeople\twho\thave\thit\trock bottom. The\tnotion\teveryone\texperiences\tjarring,\tperspective-altering\tmoments\tis almost\ta\tclich\u00e9.\tThat\tdoesn\u2019t\tmean\tit\tisn\u2019t\ttrue. J.\tK.\tRowling\tfinds\therself\tseven\tyears\tafter\tcollege\twith\ta\tfailed\tmarriage, no\tjob,\tsingle\tparent,\tkids\tshe\tcan\tbarely\tfeed,\tand\tapproaching\thomelessness.\tA teenage\tCharlie\tParker\tthinks\the\tis\ttearing\tit\tup\ton\tstage,\tright\tin\tthe\tpocket\twith the\trest\tof\tthe\tcrew,\tuntil\tJo\tJones\tthrows\ta\tcymbal\tat\thim\tand\tchases\thim\taway in\thumiliation.\tA\tyoung\tLyndon\tJohnson\tis\tbeaten\tto\ta\tpulp\tby\ta\tHill\tCountry farm\tboy\tover\ta\tgirl,\tfinally\tshattering\this\tpicture\tof\thimself\tas\t\u201ccock\tof\tthe walk.\u201d There\tare\tmany\tways\tto\thit\tbottom.\tAlmost\teveryone\tdoes\tin\ttheir\town\tway, at\tsome\tpoint. In\tthe\tnovel\tFight\tClub,\tthe\tcharacter\tJack\u2019s\tapartment\tis\tblown\tup.\tAll\tof\this possessions\u2014\u201cevery\tstick\tof\tfurniture,\u201d\twhich\the\tpathetically\tloved\u2014were\tlost. Later\tit\tturns\tout\tthat\tJack\tblew\tit\tup\thimself.\tHe\thad\tmultiple\tpersonalities,\tand \u201cTyler\tDurden\u201d\torchestrated\tthe\texplosion\tto\tshock\tJack\tfrom\tthe\tsad\tstupor\the was\tafraid\tto\tdo\tanything\tabout.\tThe\tresult\twas\ta\tjourney\tinto\tan\tentirely different\tand\trather\tdark\tpart\tof\this\tlife. In\tGreek\tmythology,\tcharacters\toften\texperience\tkatabasis\u2014or\t\u201ca\tgoing down.\u201d\tThey\u2019re\tforced\tto\tretreat,\tthey\texperience\ta\tdepression,\tor\tin\tsome\tcases literally\tdescend\tinto\tthe\tunderworld.\tWhen\tthey\temerge,\tit\u2019s\twith\theightened knowledge\tand\tunderstanding. Today,\twe\u2019d\tcall\tthat\thell\u2014and\ton\toccasion\twe\tall\tspend\tsome\ttime\tthere.","We\tsurround\tourselves\twith\tbullshit.\tWith\tdistractions.\tWith\tlies\tabout\twhat makes\tus\thappy\tand\twhat\u2019s\timportant.\tWe\tbecome\tpeople\twe\tshouldn\u2019t\tbecome and\tengage\tin\tdestructive,\tawful\tbehaviors.\tThis\tunhealthy\tand\tego-derived\tstate hardens\tand\tbecomes\talmost\tpermanent.\tUntil\tkatabasis\tforces\tus\tto\tface\tit. Duris\tdura\tfranguntur.\tHard\tthings\tare\tbroken\tby\thard\tthings. The\tbigger\tthe\tego\tthe\tharder\tthe\tfall. It\twould\tbe\tnice\tif\tit\tdidn\u2019t\thave\tto\tbe\tthat\tway.\tIf\twe\tcould\tnicely\tbe\tnudged to\tcorrect\tour\tways,\tif\ta\tquiet\tadmonishment\twas\twhat\tit\ttook\tto\tshoo\taway illusions,\tif\twe\tcould\tmanage\tto\tcircumvent\tego\ton\tour\town.\tBut\tit\tis\tjust\tnot\tso. The\tReverend\tWilliam\tA.\tSutton\tobserved\tsome\t120\tyears\tago\tthat\t\u201cwe\tcannot be\thumble\texcept\tby\tenduring\thumiliations.\u201d\tHow\tmuch\tbetter\tit\twould\tbe\tto spare\tourselves\tthese\texperiences,\tbut\tsometimes\tit\u2019s\tthe\tonly\tway\tthe\tblind\tcan be\tmade\tto\tsee. In\tfact,\tmany\tsignificant\tlife\tchanges\tcome\tfrom\tmoments\tin\twhich\twe\tare thoroughly\tdemolished,\tin\twhich\teverything\twe\tthought\twe\tknew\tabout\tthe world\tis\trendered\tfalse.\tWe\tmight\tcall\tthese\t\u201cFight\tClub\tmoments.\u201d\tSometimes they\tare\tself-inflicted,\tsometimes\tinflicted\ton\tus,\tbut\twhatever\tthe\tcause\tthey can\tbe\tcatalysts\tfor\tchanges\twe\twere\tpetrified\tto\tmake. Pick\ta\ttime\tin\tyour\tlife\t(or\tperhaps\tit\u2019s\ta\tmoment\tyou\u2019re\texperiencing\tnow). A\tboss\u2019s\teviscerating\tcritique\tof\tyou\tin\tfront\tof\tthe\tentire\tstaff.\tThat\tsit-down with\tthe\tperson\tyou\tloved.\tThe\tGoogle\tAlert\tthat\tdelivered\tthe\tarticle\tyou\u2019d hoped\twould\tnever\tbe\twritten.\tThe\tcall\tfrom\tthe\tcreditor.\tThe\tnews\tthat\tthrew you\tback\tin\tyour\tchair,\tspeechless\tand\tdumbfounded. It\twas\tin\tthose\tmoments\u2014when\tthe\tbreak\texposes\tsomething\tunseen\tbefore \u2014that\tyou\twere\tforced\tto\tmake\teye\tcontact\twith\ta\tthing\tcalled\tTruth.\tNo\tlonger could\tyou\thide\tor\tpretend. Such\ta\tmoment\traises\tmany\tquestions:\tHow\tdo\tI\tmake\tsense\tof\tthis?\tHow\tdo I\tmove\tonward\tand\tupward?\tIs\tthis\tthe\tbottom,\tor\tis\tthere\tmore\tto\tcome? Someone\ttold\tme\tmy\tproblems,\tso\thow\tdo\tI\tfix\tthem?\tHow\tdid\tI\tlet\tthis\thappen? How\tcan\tit\tnever\thappen\tagain? A\tlook\tat\thistory\tfinds\tthat\tthese\tevents\tseem\tto\tbe\tdefined\tby\tthree\ttraits: 1.\tThey\talmost\talways\tcame\tat\tthe\thands\tof\tsome\toutside\tforce\tor\tperson. 2.\tThey\toften\tinvolved\tthings\twe\talready\tknew\tabout\tourselves,\tbut\twere too\tscared\tto\tadmit. 3.\tFrom\tthe\truin\tcame\tthe\topportunity\tfor\tgreat\tprogress\tand improvement.","Does\teveryone\ttake\tadvantage\tof\tthat\topportunity?\tOf\tcourse\tnot.\tEgo\toften causes\tthe\tcrash\tand\tthen\tblocks\tus\tfrom\timproving. Was\tthe\t2008\tfinancial\tcrisis\tnot\ta\tmoment\tin\twhich\teverything\twas\tlaid\tbare for\tmany\tpeople?\tThe\tlack\tof\taccountability,\tthe\toverleveraged\tlifestyles,\tthe greed,\tthe\tdishonesty,\tthe\ttrends\tthat\tcould\tnot\tpossibly\tcontinue.\tFor\tsome,\tthis was\ta\twake-up\tcall.\tOthers,\tjust\ta\tfew\tyears\tlater,\tare\tback\texactly\twhere\tthey were.\tFor\tthem,\tit\twill\tbe\tworse\tnext\ttime. Hemingway\thad\this\town\trock-bottom\trealizations\tas\ta\tyoung\tman.\tThe understanding\the\ttook\tfrom\tthem\tis\texpressed\ttimelessly\tin\this\tbook\tA\tFarewell to\tArms.\tHe\twrote,\t\u201cThe\tworld\tbreaks\tevery\tone\tand\tafterward\tmany\tare\tstrong at\tthe\tbroken\tplaces.\tBut\tthose\tthat\twill\tnot\tbreak\tit\tkills.\u201d The\tworld\tcan\tshow\tyou\tthe\ttruth,\tbut\tno\tone\tcan\tforce\tyou\tto\taccept\tit. In\t12-step\tgroups,\talmost\tall\tthe\tsteps\tare\tabout\tsuppressing\tthe\tego\tand clearing\tout\tthe\tentitlements\tand\tbaggage\tand\twreckage\tthat\thas\tbeen accumulated\u2014so\tthat\tyou\tmight\tsee\twhat\u2019s\tleft\twhen\tall\tof\tthat\tis\tstripped\taway and\tthe\treal\tyou\tis\tleft. It\u2019s\talways\tso\ttempting\tto\tturn\tto\tthat\told\tfriend\tdenial\t(which\tis\tyour\tego refusing\tto\tbelieve\tthat\twhat\tyou\tdon\u2019t\tlike\tcould\tbe\ttrue). Psychologists\toften\tsay\tthat\tthreatened\tegotism\tis\tone\tof\tthe\tmost\tdangerous forces\ton\tearth.\tThe\tgang\tmember\twhose\t\u201chonor\u201d\tis\timpugned.\tThe\tnarcissist who\tis\trejected.\tThe\tbully\twho\tis\tmade\tto\tfeel\tshame.\tThe\timpostor\twho\tis exposed.\tThe\tplagiarist\tor\tthe\tembellisher\twhose\tstory\tstops\tadding\tup. These\tare\tnot\tpeople\tyou\twant\tto\tbe\tnear\twhen\tthey\tare\tcornered.\tNor\tis\tit\ta corner\tyou\twould\twant\tto\tback\tyourself\tinto.\tThat\u2019s\twhere\tyou\tget:\tHow\tcan these\tpeople\ttalk\tto\tme\tthis\tway?\tWho\tdo\tthey\tthink\tthey\tare?\tI\u2019ll\tmake\tthem\tall pay. Sometimes\tbecause\twe\tcan\u2019t\tface\twhat\u2019s\tbeen\tsaid\tor\twhat\u2019s\tbeen\tdone,\twe do\tthe\tunthinkable\tin\tresponse\tto\tthe\tunbearable:\twe\tescalate.\tThis\tis\tego\tin\tits purest\tand\tmost\ttoxic\tform. Look\tat\tLance\tArmstrong.\tHe\tcheated,\tbut\tso\tdid\ta\tlot\tof\tpeople.\tIt\twas\twhen this\tcheating\twas\tmade\tpublic\tand\the\twas\tforced\tto\tsee\u2014if\tonly\tfor\ta\tsecond\u2014 that\the\twas\ta\tcheater\tthat\tthings\tgot\treally\tbad.\tHe\tinsisted\ton\tdenying\tit\tdespite all\tthe\tevidence.\tHe\tinsisted\ton\truining\tother\tpeople\u2019s\tlives.\tWe\u2019re\tso\tafraid\tto lose\tour\town\testeem\tor,\tGod\tforbid,\tthe\testeem\tof\tothers,\tthat\twe\tcontemplate doing\tterrible\tthings. \u201cEveryone\twho\tdoes\twicked\tthings\thates\tthe\tlight\tand\tdoes\tnot\tcome\tto\tthe light,\tlest\this\tworks\tshould\tbe\texposed,\u201d\treads\tJohn\t3:20.\tBig\tand\tsmall,\tthis\tis","what\twe\tdo.\tGetting\thit\twith\tthat\tspotlight\tdoesn\u2019t\tfeel\tgood\u2014whether\twe\u2019re talking\tthe\texposure\tof\tordinary\tself-deception\tor\ttrue\tevil\u2014but\tturning\taway only\tdelays\tthe\treckoning.\tFor\thow\tlong,\tno\tone\tcan\tsay. Face\tthe\tsymptoms.\tCure\tthe\tdisease.\tEgo\tmakes\tit\tso\thard\u2014it\u2019s\teasier\tto delay,\tto\tdouble\tdown,\tto\tdeliberately\tavoid\tseeing\tthe\tchanges\twe\tneed\tto\tmake in\tour\tlives. But\tchange\tbegins\tby\thearing\tthe\tcriticism\tand\tthe\twords\tof\tthe\tpeople around\tyou.\tEven\tif\tthose\twords\tare\tmean\tspirited,\tangry,\tor\thurtful.\tIt\tmeans weighing\tthem,\tdiscarding\tthe\tones\tthat\tdon\u2019t\tmatter,\tand\treflecting\ton\tthe\tones you\tdo. In\tFight\tClub,\tthe\tcharacter\thas\tto\tfirebomb\this\town\tapartment\tto\tfinally break\tthrough.\tOur\texpectations\tand\texaggerations\tand\tlack\tof\trestraint\tmade such\tmoments\tinevitable,\tensuring\tthat\tit\twould\tbe\tpainful.\tNow\tit\u2019s\there,\twhat will\tyou\tmake\tof\tit?\tYou\tcan\tchange,\tor\tyou\tcan\tdeny. Vince\tLombardi\tsaid\tthis\tonce:\t\u201cA\tteam,\tlike\tmen,\tmust\tbe\tbrought\tto\tits knees\tbefore\tit\tcan\trise\tagain.\u201d\tSo\tyes,\thitting\tbottom\tis\tas\tbrutal\tas\tit\tsounds. But\tthe\tfeeling\tafter\u2014it\tis\tone\tof\tthe\tmost\tpowerful\tperspectives\tin\tthe world.\tPresident\tObama\tdescribed\tit\tas\the\tneared\tthe\tend\tof\this\ttumultuous, trying\tterms.\t\u201cI\u2019ve\tbeen\tin\tthe\tbarrel\ttumbling\tdown\tNiagara\tFalls\tand\tI emerged,\tand\tI\tlived,\tand\tthat\u2019s\tsuch\ta\tliberating\tfeeling.\u201d If\twe\tcould\thelp\tit,\tit\twould\tbe\tbetter\tif\twe\tnever\tsuffered\tillusions\tat\tall.\tIt\u2019d be\tbetter\tif\twe\tnever\thad\tto\tkneel\tor\tgo\tover\tthe\tedge.\tThat\u2019s\twhat\twe\u2019ve\tspent so\tmuch\ttime\ttalking\tabout\tso\tfar\tin\tthis\tbook.\tIf\tthat\tfight\tis\tlost,\twe\tend\tup here. In\tthe\tend,\tthe\tonly\tway\tyou\tcan\tappreciate\tyour\tprogress\tis\tto\tstand\ton\tthe edge\tof\tthe\thole\tyou\tdug\tfor\tyourself,\tlook\tdown\tinside\tit,\tand\tsmile\tfondly\tat the\tbloody\tclaw\tprints\tthat\tmarked\tyour\tjourney\tup\tthe\twalls.","DRAW\tTHE\tLINE It\tcan\truin\tyour\tlife\tonly\tif\tit\truins\tyour\tcharacter. \u2014MARCUS\tAURELIUS J ohn\tDeLorean\tran\this\tcar\tcompany\tinto\tthe\tground\twith\ta\tmix\tof\toutsized ambition,\tnegligence,\tnarcissism,\tgreed,\tand\tmismanagement.\tAs\tthe\tbad news\tbegan\tto\tpile\tup\tand\tthe\tpicture\twas\tmade\tclear\tand\tpublic,\thow\tdo\tyou think\the\tresponded? Was\tit\twith\tresigned\tacceptance?\tDid\the\tacknowledge\tthe\terrors\this disgruntled\temployees\twere\tspeaking\tout\tabout\tfor\tthe\tfirst\ttime?\tWas\the\table\tto reflect,\teven\tslightly,\ton\tthe\tmistakes\tand\tdecisions\tthat\thad\tbrought\thim,\this investors,\tand\this\temployees\tso\tmuch\ttrouble? Of\tcourse\tnot.\tInstead\the\tput\tin\tmotion\ta\tseries\tof\tevents\tthat\twould\tend\tin\ta $60\tmillion\tdrug\tdeal\tand\this\tsubsequent\tarrest.\tThat\u2019s\tright,\tafter\this\tcompany began\tto\tfail\u2014failure\talmost\texclusively\ttied\tto\this\tunprofessional\tmanagement style\u2014he\tfigured\tthe\tbest\tway\tto\tsave\tit\tall\twould\tbe\tto\tsecure\tfinancing\tthrough an\tillegal\tshipment\tof\t220\tpounds\tof\tcocaine. Sure,\tafter\this\tpublicized\tand\tvery\tembarrassing\tarrest,\tDeLorean\twas eventually\tacquitted\ton\tthe\tcharges\ton\tthe\trather\timplausible\targument\tof \u201centrapment.\u201d\tExcept\the\tis\ton\tvideo,\tholding\tup\ta\tbaggie\tof\tcocaine,\tsaying\twith giddy\texcitement,\t\u201cThis\tstuff\tis\tas\tgood\tas\tgold.\u201d There\u2019s\tno\tquestion\tabout\twho\tcaused\tJohn\tDeLorean\u2019s\tdisintegration. There\u2019s\talso\tno\tquestion\tabout\twho\tmade\tit\tso\tmuch\tworse.\tThe\tanswer\tis:\tHIM. He\tfound\thimself\tin\ta\thole\tand\tkept\tdigging\tuntil\the\tmade\tit\tall\tthe\tway\tto\thell. If\tonly\the\u2019d\tstopped.\tIf\tat\tany\tpoint\the\u2019d\tsaid:\tIs\tthis\tthe\tperson\tI\twant\tto\tbe? People\tmake\tmistakes\tall\tthe\ttime.\tThey\tstart\tcompanies\tthey\tthink\tthey\tcan manage.\tThey\thave\tgrand\tand\tbold\tvisions\tthat\twere\ta\tlittle\ttoo\tgrandiose.\tThis is\tall\tperfectly\tfine;\tit\u2019s\twhat\tbeing\tan\tentrepreneur\tor\ta\tcreative\tor\teven\ta business\texecutive\tis\tabout.","We\ttake\trisks.\tWe\tmess\tup. The\tproblem\tis\tthat\twhen\twe\tget\tour\tidentity\ttied\tup\tin\tour\twork,\twe\tworry that\tany\tkind\tof\tfailure\twill\tthen\tsay\tsomething\tbad\tabout\tus\tas\ta\tperson.\tIt\u2019s\ta fear\tof\ttaking\tresponsibility,\tof\tadmitting\tthat\twe\tmight\thave\tmessed\tup.\tIt\u2019s\tthe sunk\tcost\tfallacy.\tAnd\tso\twe\tthrow\tgood\tmoney\tand\tgood\tlife\tafter\tbad\tand\tend up\tmaking\teverything\tso\tmuch\tworse. Let\u2019s\tsay\tthe\twalls\tfeel\tlike\tthey\u2019re\tclosing\tin.\tIt\tmight\tfeel\tas\tif\tyou\u2019ve\tbeen betrayed\tor\tyour\tlife\u2019s\twork\tis\tbeing\tstolen.\tThese\tare\tnot\trational,\tgood emotions\tthat\twill\tlead\tto\trational,\tgood\tactions. Ego\tasks:\tWhy\tis\tthis\thappening\tto\tme?\tHow\tdo\tI\tsave\tthis\tand\tprove\tto everyone\tI\u2019m\tas\tgreat\tas\tthey\tthink?\tIt\u2019s\tthe\tanimal\tfear\tof\teven\tthe\tslightest\tsign of\tweakness. You\u2019ve\tseen\tthis.\tYou\u2019ve\tdone\tthis.\tFighting\tdesperately\tfor\tsomething\twe\u2019re only\tmaking\tworse. It\tis\tnot\ta\tpath\tto\tgreat\tthings. Take\tSteve\tJobs.\tHe\twas\t100\tpercent\tresponsible\tfor\this\tfiring\tfrom\tApple. Due\tto\this\tlater\tsuccess,\tApple\u2019s\tdecision\tto\tfire\thim\tseems\tlike\tan\texample\tof poor\tleadership,\tbut\the\twas,\tat\tthe\ttime,\tunmanageable.\tHis\tego\twas unequivocally\tout\tof\tcontrol.\tIf\tyou\twere\tJohn\tSculley\tand\tCEO\tof\tApple,\tyou\u2019d have\tfired\tthat\tversion\tof\tSteve\tJobs\ttoo\u2014and\tbeen\tright\tto\tdo\tso. Now\tSteve\tJobs\u2019s\tresponse\tto\this\tfiring\twas\tunderstandable.\tHe\tcried.\tHe fought.\tWhen\the\tlost,\the\tsold\tall\tbut\ta\tsingle\tshare\tof\this\tstock\tin\tApple\tand swore\tnever\tto\tthink\tof\tthe\tplace\tagain.\tBut\tthen\the\tstarted\ta\tnew\tcompany\tand threw\this\twhole\tlife\tinto\tit.\tHe\ttried\tto\tlearn\tas\tbest\the\tcould\tfrom\tthe management\tmistakes\tat\tthe\troot\tof\this\tfirst\tfailure.\tHe\tstarted\tanother\tcompany after\tthat\ttoo,\tcalled\tPixar.\tSteve\tJobs,\tthe\tfamous\tegomaniac\twho\tparked\tin handicap\tparking\tspaces\tjust\tbecause\the\tcould,\tresponded\tin\tthis\tcritical\tmoment in\ta\tsurprising\tway.\tHumble\tfor\tCEOs\tconvinced\tof\ttheir\town\tgenius,\tanyway. He\tworked\tuntil\the\u2019d\tnot\tonly\tproven\thimself\tagain,\tbut\tsignificantly\tresolved the\tflaws\tthat\thad\tcaused\this\tdownfall\tto\tbegin\twith. It\u2019s\tnot\toften\tthat\tsuccessful\tor\tpowerful\tpeople\tare\table\tto\tdo\tthis.\tNot\twhen they\texperience\theartrending\tfailure. American\tApparel\u2019s\tfounder\tDov\tCharney\tis\tan\texample.\tAfter\tlosses\tof some\t$300\tmillion\tand\tnumerous\tscandals,\tthe\tcompany\toffered\thim\ta\tchoice: step\taside\tas\tCEO\tand\tguide\tthe\tcompany\tas\ta\tcreative\tconsultant\t(for\ta\tlarge salary),\tor\tbe\tfired.\tHe\trejected\tboth\toptions\tand\tpicked\tsomething\tmuch\tworse.","After\tfiling\ta\tlawsuit\tin\tprotest,\the\tgambled\this\tentire\townership\tin\tthe company\tto\tinitiate\ta\thostile\ttakeover\twith\ta\thedge\tfund\tand\tinsisted\tthat\this conduct\tbe\tinvestigated\tand\tjudged.\tIt\twas,\tand\the\twas\tnot\tvindicated.\tHis personal\tlife\twas\tsplashed\tacross\tthe\theadlines\tand\tembarrassing\tdetails revealed.\tThe\tlawyer\the\tchose\tto\trepresent\thim\tin\this\tlawsuits\thappened\tto\tbe the\tsame\tone\twho\u2019d\talready\tsued\tCharney\tclose\tto\thalf\ta\tdozen\ttimes\tfor\tsexual harassment\tand\tfinancial\tirregularities.\tIn\tthe\tpast,\tCharney\thad\taccused\tthis man\tof\tshaking\thim\tdown\tand\tmaking\tbogus\tlegal\tclaims.\tNow\tthey\twere working\ttogether. American\tApparel\tspent\tmore\tthan\t$10\tmillion\tit\tdidn\u2019t\thave\tto\tfight\thim\toff. A\tjudge\tissued\ta\trestraining\torder.\tSales\tslumped.\tFinally,\tthe\tcompany\tbegan laying\toff\tfactory\tworkers\tand\tlongtime\temployees\u2014the\texact\tpeople\the claimed\tto\tbe\tfighting\tfor\u2014just\tto\tstay\tafloat.\tA\tyear\tlater,\tthey\twere\tbankrupt and\the\twas\tout\tof\tmoney\ttoo.* It\u2019s\tlike\tthe\tdisgraced\tstatesman\tand\tgeneral\tAlcibiades.\tIn\tthe\tPeloponnesian War,\the\tfirst\tfought\tfor\this\thome\tcountry\tand\tgreatest\tlove,\tAthens.\tThen\tdriven out\tfor\ta\tdrunken\tcrime\the\tmay\tor\tmay\tnot\thave\tcommitted,\the\tdefected\tto Sparta,\tAthens\u2019\tsworn\tenemy.\tThen\trunning\tafoul\tof\tthe\tSpartans,\the\tdefected\tto Persia\u2014the\tsworn\tenemy\tof\tboth.\tFinally,\the\twas\trecalled\tto\tAthens,\twhere\this ambitious\tplans\tto\tinvade\tSicily\tdrove\tthe\tAthenians\tto\ttheir\tultimate\truin. Ego\tkills\twhat\twe\tlove.\tSometimes,\tit\tcomes\tclose\tto\tkilling\tus\ttoo. It\tis\tinteresting\tthat\tAlexander\tHamilton,\twho\tof\tall\tthe\tFounding\tFathers\tmet the\tmost\ttragic\tand\tunnecessary\tend,\twould\thave\twise\twords\ton\tthis\ttopic.\tBut indeed\the\tdoes\t(if\tonly\the\tcould\thave\tremembered\this\town\tadvice\tbefore fighting\this\tfatal\tduel).\t\u201cAct\twith\tfortitude\tand\thonor,\u201d\the\twrote\tto\ta\tdistraught friend\tin\tserious\tfinancial\tand\tlegal\ttrouble\tof\tthe\tman\u2019s\town\tmaking.\t\u201cIf\tyou cannot\treasonably\thope\tfor\ta\tfavorable\textrication,\tdo\tnot\tplunge\tdeeper.\tHave the\tcourage\tto\tmake\ta\tfull\tstop.\u201d A\tfull\tstop.\tIt\u2019s\tnot\tthat\tthese\tfolks\tshould\thave\tquit\teverything.\tIt\u2019s\tthat\ta fighter\twho\tcan\u2019t\ttap\tout\tor\ta\tboxer\twho\tcan\u2019t\trecognize\twhen\tit\u2019s\ttime\tto\tretire gets\thurt.\tSeriously\tso.\tYou\thave\tto\tbe\table\tto\tsee\tthe\tbigger\tpicture. But\twhen\tego\tis\tin\tcontrol,\twho\tcan? Let\u2019s\tsay\tyou\u2019ve\tfailed\tand\tlet\u2019s\teven\tsay\tit\twas\tyour\tfault.\tShit\thappens\tand, as\tthey\tsay,\tsometimes\tshit\thappens\tin\tpublic.\tIt\u2019s\tnot\tfun.\tThe\tquestions\tremain: Are\tyou\tgoing\tto\tmake\tit\tworse?\tOr\tare\tyou\tgoing\tto\temerge\tfrom\tthis\twith\tyour dignity\tand\tcharacter\tintact?\tAre\tyou\tgoing\tto\tlive\tto\tfight\tanother\tday?","When\ta\tteam\tlooks\tlike\tthey\u2019re\tgoing\tto\tlose\ta\tgame,\tthe\tcoach\tdoesn\u2019t\tcall them\tall\tover\tand\tlie\tto\tthem.\tInstead,\the\tor\tshe\treminds\tthem\twho\tthey\tare\tand what\tthey\u2019re\tcapable\tof,\tand\turges\tthem\tto\tgo\tback\tout\tthere\tand\tembody\tthat. With\twinning\tor\tmiracles\toff\ttheir\tminds,\ta\tgood\tteam\tdoes\tits\tbest\tto\tcomplete the\tgame\tat\tthe\thighest\tstandard\tpossible\t(and\tshare\tthe\tplaying\ttime\twith\tother players\twho\tdon\u2019t\tregularly\tplay).\tAnd\tsometimes,\tthey\teven\tcome\tback\tand win. Most\ttrouble\tis\ttemporary\t.\t.\t.\tunless\tyou\tmake\tthat\tnot\tso.\tRecovery\tis\tnot grand,\tit\u2019s\tone\tstep\tin\tfront\tof\tthe\tother.\tUnless\tyour\tcure\tis\tmore\tof\tthe\tdisease. Only\tego\tthinks\tembarrassment\tor\tfailure\tare\tmore\tthan\twhat\tthey\tare. History\tis\tfull\tof\tpeople\twho\tsuffered\tabject\thumiliations\tyet\trecovered\tto\thave long\tand\timpressive\tcareers.\tPoliticians\twho\tlost\telections\tor\tlost\toffices\tdue\tto indiscretions\u2014but\tcame\tback\tto\tlead\tafter\ttime\thad\tpassed.\tActors\twhose movies\tbombed,\tauthors\twho\tgot\twriter\u2019s\tblock,\tcelebrities\twho\tmade\tgaffes, parents\twho\tmade\tmistakes,\tentrepreneurs\twith\tfaltering\tcompanies,\texecutives who\tgot\tfired,\tathletes\twho\twere\tcut,\tpeople\twho\tlived\ttoo\twell\tat\tthe\ttop\tof\tthe market.\tAll\tthese\tfolks\tfelt\tthe\thard\tedge\tof\tfailure,\tjust\tlike\twe\thave.\tWhen\twe lose,\twe\thave\ta\tchoice:\tAre\twe\tgoing\tto\tmake\tthis\ta\tlose-lose\tsituation\tfor ourselves\tand\teveryone\tinvolved?\tOr\twill\tit\tbe\ta\tlose\t.\t.\t.\tand\tthen\twin? Because\tyou\twill\tlose\tin\tlife.\tIt\u2019s\ta\tfact.\tA\tdoctor\thas\tto\tcall\ttime\tof\tdeath\tat some\tpoint.\tThey\tjust\tdo. Ego\tsays\twe\u2019re\tthe\timmovable\tobject,\tthe\tunstoppable\tforce.\tThis\tdelusion causes\tthe\tproblems.\tIt\tmeets\tfailure\tand\tadversity\twith\trule\tbreaking\u2014betting everything\ton\tsome\tcrazy\tscheme;\tdoubling\tdown\ton\tbehind-the-scenes machinations\tor\tunlikely\tHail\tMarys\u2014even\tthough\tthat\u2019s\twhat\tgot\tyou\tto\tthis pain\tpoint\tin\tthe\tfirst\tplace. At\tany\tgiven\ttime\tin\tthe\tcircle\tof\tlife,\twe\tmay\tbe\taspiring,\tsucceeding,\tor failing\u2014though\tright\tnow\twe\u2019re\tfailing.\tWith\twisdom,\twe\tunderstand\tthat\tthese positions\tare\ttransitory,\tnot\tstatements\tabout\tyour\tvalue\tas\ta\thuman\tbeing.\tWhen success\tbegins\tto\tslip\tfrom\tyour\tfingers\u2014for\twhatever\treason\u2014the\tresponse isn\u2019t\tto\tgrip\tand\tclaw\tso\thard\tthat\tyou\tshatter\tit\tto\tpieces.\tIt\u2019s\tto\tunderstand\tthat you\tmust\twork\tyourself\tback\tto\tthe\taspirational\tphase.\tYou\tmust\tget\tback\tto\tfirst principles\tand\tbest\tpractices. \u201cHe\twho\tfears\tdeath\twill\tnever\tdo\tanything\tworthy\tof\ta\tliving\tman,\u201d\tSeneca once\tsaid.\tAlter\tthat:\tHe\twho\twill\tdo\tanything\tto\tavoid\tfailure\twill\talmost certainly\tdo\tsomething\tworthy\tof\ta\tfailure.","The\tonly\treal\tfailure\tis\tabandoning\tyour\tprinciples.\tKilling\twhat\tyou\tlove because\tyou\tcan\u2019t\tbear\tto\tpart\tfrom\tit\tis\tselfish\tand\tstupid.\tIf\tyour\treputation can\u2019t\tabsorb\ta\tfew\tblows,\tit\twasn\u2019t\tworth\tanything\tin\tthe\tfirst\tplace.","MAINTAIN\tYOUR\tOWN\tSCORECARD I\tnever\tlook\tback,\texcept\tto\tfind\tout\tabout\tmistakes\t.\t.\t.\tI\tonly\tsee\tdanger\tin\tthinking\tback about\tthings\tyou\tare\tproud\tof. \u2014ELISABETH\tNOELLE-NEUMANN O n\tApril\t16,\t2000,\tthe\tNew\tEngland\tPatriots\tdrafted\tan\textra\tquarterback out\tof\tthe\tUniversity\tof\tMichigan.\tThey\u2019d\tscouted\thim\tthoroughly\tand\thad their\teye\ton\thim\tfor\tsome\ttime.\tSeeing\tthat\the\twas\tstill\tavailable,\tthey\ttook\thim. It\twas\tthe\t6th\tround\tand\tthe\t199th\tpick\tof\tthe\tdraft. The\tyoung\tquarterback\u2019s\tname\twas\tTom\tBrady. He\twas\tfourth\tstring\tat\tthe\tbeginning\tof\this\trookie\tseason.\tBy\this\tsecond season,\the\twas\ta\tstarter.\tNew\tEngland\twon\tthe\tSuper\tBowl\tthat\tyear.\tBrady\twas named\tMVP. In\tterms\tof\treturn\ton\tinvestment,\tit\u2019s\tprobably\tthe\tsingle\tgreatest\tdraft\tpick\tin the\thistory\tof\tfootball:\tfour\tSuper\tBowl\trings\t(out\tof\t6\tappearances),\t14\tstarting seasons,\t172\twins,\t428\ttouchdowns,\t3\tSuper\tBowl\tMVPs,\t58,000\tyards,\t10\tPro Bowls,\tand\tmore\tdivision\ttitles\tthan\tany\tquarterback\tin\thistory.\tIt\u2019s\tnot\teven finished\tpaying\tdividends.\tBrady\tmay\tstill\thave\tmany\tmore\tseasons\tleft\tin\thim. So\tyou\u2019d\tthink\tthat\tthe\tPatriots\u2019\tfront\toffice\twould\tbe\tecstatic\twith\thow\tit turned\tout,\tand\tindeed,\tthey\twere.\tThey\twere\talso\tdisappointed\u2014deeply\tso\u2014in themselves.\tBrady\u2019s\tsurprising\tabilities\tmeant\tthat\tthe\tPatriots\u2019\tscouting\treports were\tway\toff.\tFor\tall\ttheir\tevaluations\tof\tplayers,\tthey\u2019d\tsomehow\tmissed\tor miscalculated\tall\tof\this\tintangible\tattributes.\tThey\u2019d\tlet\tthis\tgem\twait\tuntil\tthe sixth\tround.\tSomeone\telse\tcould\thave\tdrafted\thim.\tMore\tthan\tthat,\tthey\tdidn\u2019t even\tknow\tthey\twere\tright\tabout\tBrady\tuntil\tinjuries\tknocked\tout\tDrew Bledsoe,\ttheir\tprized\tstarter,\tand\tforced\tthem\tto\trealize\this\tpotential. So,\teven\tthough\ttheir\tbet\tpaid\toff,\tthe\tPatriots\thoned\tin\ton\tthe\tspecific intelligence\tfailure\tthat\tcould\thave\tprevented\tthe\tpick\tfrom\thappening\tin\tthe\tfirst","place.\tNot\tthat\tthey\twere\tnit-picking.\tOr\tindulging\tin\tperfectionism.\tThey\thad higher\tstandards\tof\tperformance\tto\tadhere\tto. For\tyears,\tScott\tPioli,\tdirector\tof\tpersonnel\tfor\tthe\tPatriots,\tkept\ta\tphoto\ton his\tdesk\tof\tDave\tStachelski,\ta\tplayer\tthe\tteam\thad\tdrafted\tin\tthe\t5th\tround,\tbut who\tnever\tmade\tit\tthrough\ttraining\tcamp.\tIt\twas\ta\treminder:\tYou\u2019re\tnot\tas\tgood as\tyou\tthink.\tYou\tdon\u2019t\thave\tit\tall\tfigured\tout.\tStay\tfocused.\tDo\tbetter. Coach\tJohn\tWooden\twas\tvery\tclear\tabout\tthis\ttoo.\tThe\tscoreboard\twas\tnot the\tjudge\tof\twhether\the\tor\tthe\tteam\thad\tachieved\tsuccess\u2014that\twasn\u2019t\twhat constituted\t\u201cwinning.\u201d\tBo\tJackson\twouldn\u2019t\tget\timpressed\twhen\the\thit\ta\thome run\tor\tran\tfor\ta\ttouchdown\tbecause\the\tknew\t\u201che\thadn\u2019t\tdone\tit\tperfect.\u201d\t(In\tfact, he\tdidn\u2019t\task\tfor\tthe\tball\tafter\this\tfirst\thit\tin\tmajor-league\tbaseball\tfor\tthat reason\u2014to\thim\tit\twas\t\u201cjust\ta\tground\tball\tup\tthe\tmiddle.\u201d) This\tis\tcharacteristic\tof\thow\tgreat\tpeople\tthink.\tIt\u2019s\tnot\tthat\tthey\tfind\tfailure in\tevery\tsuccess.\tThey\tjust\thold\tthemselves\tto\ta\tstandard\tthat\texceeds\twhat society\tmight\tconsider\tto\tbe\tobjective\tsuccess.\tBecause\tof\tthat,\tthey\tdon\u2019t\tmuch care\twhat\tother\tpeople\tthink;\tthey\tcare\twhether\tthey\tmeet\ttheir\town\tstandards. And\tthese\tstandards\tare\tmuch,\tmuch\thigher\tthan\teveryone\telse\u2019s. The\tPatriots\tsaw\tthe\tBrady\tpick\tas\tbeing\tmore\tlucky\tthan\tsmart.\tAnd\tthough some\tpeople\tare\tfine\tgiving\tthemselves\tcredit\tfor\tluck,\tthey\tweren\u2019t.\tNo\tone would\tsay\tthe\tPatriots\u2014or\tany\tteam\tin\tthe\tNFL\u2014are\twithout\tego.\tBut\tin\tthis instance,\tinstead\tof\tcelebrating\tor\tcongratulating\tthemselves,\tthey\tput\ttheir heads\tback\tdown\tand\tfocused\ton\thow\tto\tget\teven\tbetter.\tThat\u2019s\twhat\tmakes humility\tsuch\ta\tpowerful\tforce\u2014organizationally,\tpersonally,\tprofessionally. This\tisn\u2019t\tnecessarily\tfun,\tby\tthe\tway.\tIt\tcan\tfeel\tlike\tself-inflicted\ttorture sometimes.\tBut\tit\tdoes\tforce\tyou\tto\talways\tkeep\tgoing,\tand\talways\timprove. Ego\tcan\u2019t\tsee\tboth\tsides\tof\tthe\tissue.\tIt\tcan\u2019t\tget\tbetter\tbecause\tit\tonly\tsees the\tvalidation.\tRemember,\t\u201cVain\tmen\tnever\thear\tanything\tbut\tpraise.\u201d\tIt\tcan only\tsee\twhat\u2019s\tgoing\twell,\tnot\twhat\tisn\u2019t.\tIt\u2019s\twhy\tyou\tmight\tsee\tegomaniacs with\ttemporary\tleads,\tbut\trarely\tlasting\truns\tof\tit. For\tus,\tthe\tscoreboard\tcan\u2019t\tbe\tthe\tonly\tscoreboard.\tWarren\tBuffett\thas\tsaid the\tsame\tthing,\tmaking\ta\tdistinction\tbetween\tthe\tinner\tscorecard\tand\tthe external\tone.\tYour\tpotential,\tthe\tabsolute\tbest\tyou\u2019re\tcapable\tof\u2014that\u2019s\tthe metric\tto\tmeasure\tyourself\tagainst.\tYour\tstandards\tare.\tWinning\tis\tnot\tenough. People\tcan\tget\tlucky\tand\twin.\tPeople\tcan\tbe\tassholes\tand\twin.\tAnyone\tcan\twin. But\tnot\teveryone\tis\tthe\tbest\tpossible\tversion\tof\tthemselves. Harsh,\tyes.\tThe\tflip\tside\tis\tthat\tit\tmeans\tbeing\thonestly\table\tto\tbe\tproud\tand strong\tduring\tthe\toccasional\tdefeat\tas\twell.\tWhen\tyou\ttake\tego\tout\tof\tthe","equation,\tother\tpeople\u2019s\topinions\tand\texternal\tmarkers\twon\u2019t\tmatter\tas\tmuch. That\u2019s\tmore\tdifficult,\tbut\tultimately\ta\tformula\tfor\tresilience. The\teconomist\t(and\tphilosopher)\tAdam\tSmith\thad\ta\ttheory\tfor\thow\twise\tand good\tpeople\tevaluate\ttheir\tactions: There\tare\ttwo\tdifferent\toccasions\tupon\twhich\twe\texamine\tour\town conduct,\tand\tendeavour\tto\tview\tit\tin\tthe\tlight\tin\twhich\tthe\timpartial spectator\twould\tview\tit:\tfirst,\twhen\twe\tare\tabout\tto\tact;\tand\tsecondly,\tafter we\thave\tacted.\tOur\tviews\tare\tapt\tto\tbe\tvery\tpartial\tin\tboth\tcases;\tbut\tthey are\tapt\tto\tbe\tmost\tpartial\twhen\tit\tis\tof\tmost\timportance\tthat\tthey\tshould\tbe otherwise.\tWhen\twe\tare\tabout\tto\tact,\tthe\teagerness\tof\tpassion\twill\tseldom allow\tus\tto\tconsider\twhat\twe\tare\tdoing,\twith\tthe\tcandour\tof\tan\tindifferent person.\t.\t.\t.\tWhen\tthe\taction\tis\tover,\tindeed,\tand\tthe\tpassions\twhich prompted\tit\thave\tsubsided,\twe\tcan\tenter\tmore\tcoolly\tinto\tthe\tsentiments\tof the\tindifferent\tspectator. This\t\u201cindifferent\tspectator\u201d\tis\ta\tsort\tof\tguide\twith\twhich\twe\tcan\tjudge\tour behavior,\tas\topposed\tto\tthe\tgroundless\tapplause\tthat\tsociety\tso\toften\tgives\tout. Not\tthat\tit\u2019s\tjust\tabout\tvalidation,\tthough. Think\tof\tall\tthe\tpeople\twho\texcuse\ttheir\tbehavior\u2014politicians,\tpowerful CEOs,\tand\tthe\tlike\u2014as\t\u201cnot\ttechnically\tillegal.\u201d\tThink\tof\tthe\ttimes\tthat\tyou\u2019ve excused\tyour\town\twith\t\u201cno\tone\twill\tknow.\u201d\tThis\tis\tthe\tmoral\tgray\tarea\tthat\tour ego\tloves\tto\texploit.\tHolding\tyour\tego\tagainst\ta\tstandard\t(inner\tor\tindifferent\tor whatever\tyou\twant\tto\tcall\tit)\tmakes\tit\tless\tand\tless\tlikely\tthat\texcess\tor wrongdoing\tis\tgoing\tto\tbe\ttolerated\tby\tyou.\tBecause\tit\u2019s\tnot\tabout\twhat\tyou\tcan get\taway\twith,\tit\u2019s\tabout\twhat\tyou\tshould\tor\tshouldn\u2019t\tdo. It\u2019s\ta\tharder\troad\tat\tfirst,\tbut\tone\tthat\tultimately\tmakes\tus\tless\tselfish\tand self-absorbed.\tA\tperson\twho\tjudges\thimself\tbased\ton\this\town\tstandards\tdoesn\u2019t crave\tthe\tspotlight\tthe\tsame\tway\tas\tsomeone\twho\tlets\tapplause\tdictate\tsuccess. A\tperson\twho\tcan\tthink\tlong\tterm\tdoesn\u2019t\tpity\therself\tduring\tshort-term setbacks.\tA\tperson\twho\tvalues\tthe\tteam\tcan\tshare\tcredit\tand\tsubsume\this\town interests\tin\ta\tway\tthat\tmost\tothers\tcan\u2019t. Reflecting\ton\twhat\twent\twell\tor\thow\tamazing\twe\tare\tdoesn\u2019t\tget\tus anywhere,\texcept\tmaybe\tto\twhere\twe\tare\tright\tnow.\tBut\twe\twant\tto\tgo\tfurther, we\twant\tmore,\twe\twant\tto\tcontinue\tto\timprove. Ego\tblocks\tthat,\tso\twe\tsubsume\tit\tand\tsmash\tit\twith\tcontinually\thigher standards.\tNot\tthat\twe\tare\tendlessly\tpursuing\tmore,\tas\tif\twe\u2019re\tracked\twith","greed,\tbut\tinstead,\twe\u2019re\tinching\tour\tway\ttoward\treal\timprovement,\twith discipline\trather\tthan\tdisposition.","ALWAYS\tLOVE And\twhy\tshould\twe\tfeel\tanger\tat\tthe\tworld? As\tif\tthe\tworld\twould\tnotice! \u2014EURIPIDES I n\t1939,\ta\tyoung\tprodigy\tnamed\tOrson\tWelles\twas\tgiven\tone\tof\tthe\tmost unheard-of\tdeals\tin\tHollywood\thistory.\tHe\tcould\twrite,\tact,\tand\tdirect\tin\ttwo films\tof\this\tchoosing\tfor\tRKO,\ta\tmajor\tmovie\tstudio.\tFor\this\tfirst\tpicture,\the decided\tto\ttell\tthe\tstory\tof\ta\tmysterious\tnewspaper\tbaron\twho\tbecame\ta\tprisoner of\this\tenormous\tempire\tand\tlifestyle. William\tRandolph\tHearst,\tthe\tinfamous\tmedia\tmagnate,\tdecided\tthat\tthis movie\twas\tbased\ton\this\tlife\tand,\tmore\timportant,\tthat\tit\tdid\tso\toffensively.\tHe then\tbegan,\tand\tinitially\tsucceeded\tin,\tan\tall-consuming\tcampaign\tto\tdestroy one\tof\tthe\tgreatest\tfilms\tof\tall\ttime. Here\u2019s\twhat\u2019s\tso\tinteresting\tabout\tthis.\tFirst,\tHearst\tmost\tlikely\tnever\teven saw\tthe\tmovie\tso\the\thad\tno\tidea\twhat\twas\tactually\tin\tit.\tSecond,\tit\twasn\u2019t intended\tto\tbe\tabout\thim\u2014or\tat\tleast\tsolely\tabout\thim.\t(As\tfar\tas\twe\tknow,\tthe character\tCharles\tFoster\tKane\twas\tan\tamalgam\tof\tseveral\thistorical\tfigures including\tSamuel\tInsull\tand\tRobert\tMcCormick;\tthe\tmovie\twas\tinspired\tby\ttwo similar\tportraits\tof\tpower\tby\tCharlie\tChaplin\tand\tAldous\tHuxley;\tand\tit\twasn\u2019t supposed\tto\tvilify,\tbut\tto\thumanize.)\tThird,\tHearst\twas\tone\tof\tthe\trichest\tmen\tin the\tworld\tat\tthe\ttime,\tand\tat\tseventy-eight,\tnear\tthe\tend\tof\this\tlife.\tWhy\twould he\tspend\tso\tmuch\ttime\ton\tsomething\tas\tinconsequential\tas\ta\tfictional\tmovie\tby\ta first-time\tdirector?\tFourth,\tit\twas\this\tcampaign\tto\tstop\tit\tthat\tsecured\tthe movie\u2019s\tplace\tin\tpopular\tlore\tand\tmade\tit\tclear\tthe\textent\tto\twhich\this\tdrive\tto control\tand\tmanipulate\twould\tgo.\tIronically,\the\tcemented\this\town\tlegacy\tas\ta reviled\tAmerican\tfigure\tmore\tthan\tany\tcritic\tever\tcould\thave. Thus,\tthe\tparadox\tof\thate\tand\tbitterness.\tIt\taccomplishes\talmost\texactly\tthe opposite\tof\twhat\twe\thope\tit\tdoes.\tIn\tthe\tInternet\tage,\twe\tcall\tthis\tthe\tStreisand","effect\t(named\tafter\ta\tsimilar\tattempt\tby\tthe\tsinger\tand\tactress\tBarbra\tStreisand, who\ttried\tto\tlegally\tremove\ta\tphoto\tof\ther\thome\tfrom\tthe\tWeb.\tHer\tactions backfired\tand\tfar\tmore\tpeople\tsaw\tit\tthan\twould\thave\thad\tshe\tleft\tthe\tissue alone.)\tAttempting\tto\tdestroy\tsomething\tout\tof\thate\tor\tego\toften\tensures\tthat\tit will\tbe\tpreserved\tand\tdisseminated\tforever. The\tlengths\tthat\tHearst\twent\tto\twere\tabsurd.\tHe\tsent\this\tmost\tinfluential\tand powerful\tgossip\tcolumnist,\tLouella\tParsons,\tto\tthe\tstudio\tto\tdemand\ta\tscreening. Based\ton\ther\tfeedback,\the\tdecided\the\twould\tdo\teverything\tin\this\tpower\tto\tblock it\tfrom\tbeing\tmade\tpublic.\tHe\tissued\ta\tdirective\tthat\tnone\tof\this\tnewspapers were\tto\tmake\tany\tmention\tof\tany\tRKO\tfilm\u2014the\tcompany\tproducing\tCitizen Kane\u2014period.\t(More\tthan\ta\tdecade\tlater,\tthis\tban\tstill\tapplied\tto\tWelles\tfor\tall Hearst\tpapers.)\tHearst\u2019s\tpapers\tbegan\texploring\tnegative\tstories\tabout\tWelles and\this\tprivate\tlife.\tHis\tgossip\tcolumnist\tthreatened\tto\tdo\tthe\tsame\tto\teach\tof\tthe RKO\tboard\tmembers.\tHearst\talso\tmade\tthreats\tto\tthe\tmovie\tindustry\tas\ta\twhole, as\ta\tway\tof\tturning\tother\tstudio\theads\tagainst\tthe\tpicture.\tAn\t$800,000\toffer\twas made\tfor\tthe\trights\tto\tthe\tfilm\tso\tthat\tit\tmight\tbe\tburned\tor\tdestroyed.\tMost theater\tchains\twere\tpressured\tinto\trefusing\tto\tshow\tit,\tand\tno\tads\tfor\tit\twere allowed\tin\tany\tHearst-owned\tproperties.\tHearst\tsympathizers\tbegan\treporting rumors\tabout\tWelles\tto\tvarious\tauthorities,\tand\tin\t1941,\tJ.\tEdgar\tHoover\u2019s\tFBI opened\ta\tfile\ton\thim. The\tresult\twas\tthat\tthe\tmovie\tfailed\tcommercially.\tIt\ttook\tyears\tfor\tit\tto\tfind its\tplace\tin\tthe\tculture.\tOnly\tat\tgreat\texpense\tand\twith\tgreat\texertion,\twas\tHearst able\tto\thold\tit\tback. We\tall\thave\tstuff\tthat\tpisses\tus\toff.\tThe\tmore\tsuccessful\tor\tpowerful\twe\tare, the\tmore\tthere\twill\tbe\tthat\twe\tthink\twe\tneed\tto\tprotect\tin\tterms\tof\tour\tlegacy, image,\tand\tinfluence.\tIf\twe\u2019re\tnot\tcareful,\thowever,\twe\tcan\tend\tup\twasting\tan incredible\tamount\tof\ttime\ttrying\tto\tkeep\tthe\tworld\tfrom\tdispleasing\tor disrespecting\tus. It\tis\ta\tsobering\tthought\tto\tconsider\tfor\ta\tmoment\tall\tthe\tneedless\tdeath\tand needless\twaste\tinflicted\tover\tthe\teons\tby\tangry\tmen\tor\taggrieved\twomen\ton other\tpeople,\ton\tsociety,\tand\ton\tthemselves.\tOver\twhat?\tReasons\tthat\tcan\thardly be\tremembered. You\tknow\twhat\tis\ta\tbetter\tresponse\tto\tan\tattack\tor\ta\tslight\tor\tsomething\tyou don\u2019t\tlike?\tLove.\tThat\u2019s\tright,\tlove.\tFor\tthe\tneighbor\twho\twon\u2019t\tturn\tdown\tthe music.\tFor\tthe\tparent\tthat\tlet\tyou\tdown.\tFor\tthe\tbureaucrat\twho\tlost\tyour paperwork.\tFor\tthe\tgroup\tthat\trejects\tyou.\tFor\tthe\tcritic\twho\tattacks\tyou.\tThe"]
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