1920

'' ()l\'('J.D !'ON A T IMEPuge IHI

OUR J<'ACULTY\" J'ul(e !If

GALLERY OF ROC E LLEN JONES- Happened on thi · earth omewher b tween Mid· vale and Bluffdale. Distinguished hims If as a scholar wh n only a lad- hi. expression plainly showing tb vast knowledge h ought to hav . He il:l a strict v gPlarian, a lng nothing but pork . Had an en- larged fungi on th brain, but after a succ sl'<ful op ratoin by a plum- ber he died. JACK IRVING- Born on the 29th or February, 1901, in Rotterdam,Holland. First came into prominenc with hi Hooligan smil and Kan-garoo waddle. haws a great last for purpl socks and gold n hiar.Faithful follow r of the wax floor. Looks divine in a t>ink t a gown andingrown mustache. Fond or p anuts and pretzel:;. DAVE GARDNEll- Birlhpla disput d deni d by both Pr0\'0 and Bingham. Look well in a dark room, one room being unable to hold both him and his fe t (ures). Has a ownderful taking wa} in a Gypsy costume and short pants. Fond of solitude and bananas; al~o lov to r· ile joyful, jolly joke! ts to Ruth, hi~ better half. Died from me ling his fac in the looking glasl>. VERNE DESP IN- This rt>mHrl{abl young lad wasborn young and bas remain d so pv r sine . He ha!:-1 ap-ple sauce campi xion and strawb rry eyE's, with a Iillitouch or cb rry. His kn e had a quarr I and fell ul. 1-LPis a strong follow t' or th Oanvinian th ory. I;; most HP·preciat d in hi;; cla~s H when he is abs nt, whi h Is quitFr quent. He has an open countenaoc - very open . J eat hcaus d by a draul{hl throug;,h a era k in his face.

BOB HA:\flLTON-A very rare speci s of th meat pE'<Idlervariety. Born when a child. Has a very rar haibl of being at chool early but is never on time. This sp cimE'n of adolesc nthumanity bas a rarE' habit of ·'trying to gel ads.\" He has a lovfor yellow susp nder and does not like oy ters. Hi. main faultis w aring tb wrong colorE'd tie with numb r twelve shoes. KELVI AYLET1' Born in Arabia. \\'as young and hand-:;ome wh~n a child; but soon lost hi b auty and now i oftentaken for a enor. Loves to romp and play. Promotes popu-larity contestf:\ and take~ d feat sadly but happily. Is noted forhi:; :;up rb impersonations of human b ings. He is a succE'ssfulham actor and our on!' wish is that he marries th girl h abhors. HENRY JOI,GENSEN- Born in Crescent, but carne to thE'L nited States in 1904. Has an unmistakable look of daring andadvE'nture in his f E't, which are uncommonly small for such alargE' brain. Is very quick temper d, but slow to become angry.HE>nry is a p rfect maniac for study although he is never pre-l)ared. Ilis one ambition is to be a chemi t but be b\"as a vE'ry badhabit or drinking acids such as H. . L., which may some time inlat r y!'ars have an effE'ct on him. THE WALL-NUTSWhen it comes to crooks and cronies. And a bunch of worth! ss g nts,Do but view our wall-nut loaf rs, Jordan's precious ornaments.Lazy, slouching, shuffling, idling! Their ambitions and their aimsAr· to cau e just endless trouble, And side-step the lively Mayn s.Some girls call them \"clas and \"cutie \" ' ause they flirt and step it high,But if classed as social duties, Say \"With dead dogs let th m lie.\" R. A.

POOR KEN! Kenneth nrady went to town In a small tin-lizzie; But p rpetual motion up ancl down Jm•t made poor Ken plumb dizzi H Gil s' hright etas had fix d that Ford 'Twoulcl have pr v nted this diEWHler. But al'ter that B'orcl hit a ten-inch board ](pn's poor bead wanted a plaste1·. ow this bright land is full of J<'ords. As you ar ·ure to s But if th y wcr all nail cl up with board 'Twould h saf r l'or you and me. .L. H.. '23 .Litlle M :~s l\1 JTill Sat on tl barrel. Eating lwr curds and w!J y. First came Albe>rt Elvin, And then her dea1· K Ivin; Now whiC'h or the> two shall stay? A FRE HIE A trres hie lit on a cannibal isl , A cannibal came and said with a smil , \" I ! e' ll mal< a fin meal.\" as h nibbl d his sic! , nut the trr Rhie was gr e n. and the can- nibal dierl.Littl (? JaC'k Irving. at on tb curbing,Smoking hiR pipe of rlay,He said. \"Well, hy thunde>rThis new pipe's a wonde1·,Bttt it mak 1> me fe1 1 que r, that I'll say.\" ...1'.'.. 111



JIVVER'TIS E RS: ll l l l tl l li i ii i ii i Ui tl l ll l lt l li l ll l l! l ll l i l ll l ll l ll l l l l ll l li l ll l l l ll I I I I I I t li l ll l ri iH I I II I II I I I I I I I I 1 11 1 11 1 11 1 1 1 11 1 .1 1 I I II I I I l ii i i1 1Ui tl l l: l ll l l 1 11 1 11 11'.:Save for Protection ...Jt is often said that a dollar i~ ) <Htr bc~t friend. and many ,.times it's true. A dollar when yuu need it is a mighty helpa protection to yuur family andy< urself.D posits, large or small, made in a Savings .\cconnt at thisBank. paying- 4 p ·r cent interest compunmle<l annua ll y, arethe best protection )'1111 can lmy.Start now. Midvale State Bank Midvale, Utah~l l ll l t l l ll l ll t ·t t ll l ll l ll l t ll 11 1 11 1 11 1 11 1 ' II III 11 11 1' 11 111 ·t t l l :tl lll ll 1 111 il tl l II 1 11 1 11 1 11'1 1 11 1 11 1 I Lll l ll l ll l ll l il l ll l ll l l l ll lll l ll l ll l ll l li l lll II II I UI UI II I IJ I HI Il l ll:. Page 00

-111 11 111 111 1 11 1 11 1 11 111 1 1 1 11 111 1 11 1 1! 111 1 11 1 11 1 11 1 l ll l l ll ll l ll l ll l l l l l! l tl l ll l ll l ll l ll ~l l l l l l ll l ll l ll l l1 l li l li i i i i ii i ii i 11 1 11 1 11 1 1 1 JI I II I Il l ll l ll l ll l ll l tl l l l l ll l l1 1 11 1 1l l l1 :. ~~ -.. ;,-- Compliments of . Compliments of.., iioLake Business .., Bell Sample Shoe College-- Salt .-,. Comp an y - ---~ 401- 4 B oyd Park BuildingOrpheunz Theatre Bldg. -.., -......,,, South Mt1i11 Street ;! ;! ;! - ;! i~ 11 1 11 1 11 11 1 1 11 1111 1 ll ll 'l l lf l l ll ll l ll ll l l ll l li i U I I II I II II I I\ I Il llll li i i ii ii i \I I IJ II I I~ - .- I I UI II 1 11 1! 1 1 .1 1 1 1 11 III 11 I II ! IIIII II I I I· I I II II I II IIII ' II II I tl l ll l ll l ll l ll !l l ll 11 l ll l ll ~ The following conversation was overheard on a street or Sandy: \"Have you heard that the Jordan District is going to have a dentist?\" Second Party: Dentist! W hat do they want a dentist for? Why don't they let J immy Sa bine do it; he does all the other work like t hat.\".: tt i i ! I II I II I I II III III II I II I I II IJI I!II II tl l ll l l l l ll l tl l ll l ll l lt l ll l ll l lii! I I II II I JI I II I II I II I II I II I 111 11 1 11 1 11 1 11 1 11 1 ll l ll l ll l l l l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l tl l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l li 1 W-iiiiii Hudson Also Outsells All Fine Cars ~uprenla('y in c.Juttliti(•s thn t c-ounl in t\"Yeryrla~, $l\"'l' \· fc.· · mn(l li ud~on the wor l <l's lurg·('st selling lln (':II'. l'llief Of 1h('Se iS endUI'!LI1t'E'. !\"11ud~ol'l'H ex · 1u~h· ~upei'-H'ix 111otn1· hns e-n tlhled H t() v.r in a1Hl hold lht' ·wo1'1d s wurlh ,vhil stoc·l<. l'al' t'r-t·or·ds <H'c ·eleJ·nt1on ~tncl htll C'linlbing, .111d to defeat; the world's faHtt>Rl spp(•ial J'n<:Jng- t-'H1' S in ro :ul and ~pecdw:ty (•nulc·sts. The; p ndur·an<'\ e !';ho,vn in tne~e t~sts. du to Sun~r·-Six r·e<luC'tinn of d stnu: tlve vt- l)r·:ttion, t·ounts for fur nlot' l tlutn just grpat \"Pe<'d. 'l'hilll< what thiS 11H':l11H lU ~ ' Oll. lt .O.lSRUJ' S depC\"ndahle 8\'ei' Yh:l~ .\· ll'HilSPOI'lU- lion, r1·e('dorn frorn 'vurry u\· et· m o Lor· u·ouhle~ and ex·· eptionttlly long life in ~' Olll' f ' Hr . ThE-n 1'('111 nlh{'l' that lludsun for YC'nrs ha~ ~<·t lll,ltor ~tyl~~ and le:tdH in lJp:cuty or d~ ign and d v~loprnenl of c· otnforl~ nnd rt'nnements. \Yhut other eal' offers sn llHI<'h? Th<:> CaC't th>\l ll udsnn !~ads all nne ('\"''\" in sales Is th~ uns\ver. To ht~ cer·lain oC deth·ery yun should or<l r your 11\Hl~on no\"·· FRANK C. HOWE, Dealer ;llnrrny C ity•t l l• l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l tJ I I J I II I I I II I II I II I II I I! I II I II I II I II I !I I ll l l l l ll l ll l fl l li i i i i ii i ii i JI I II I II I II I I I I II I JI I IJ I I I i l l ll l il l l l l l l l l l l ll l l t l l l l l t l l f l ll l l l l ll l ll l ll l ll l l l l ll l l l l ll l ll l ll ~ l'nge 1)7

~ U I II I II I II I I t l rl l ll l ll l ll l ll ll l l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l t! l ll l ll l ll l l l ll l ll l tl l ll l ll l ll l ll l l ll ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l l• l l l, l 11 •, 1•· 1 I I l 1• l 1. 1~..!'Sandy City Bank ..Does a general bank1ng business}'(){ 'R P. ITRO.\'. IGH SO/ ,/CITRD4 P ; R CENT PAlO ON SAVINGS 111 1111 1111 1 11 1111 111 111 1 111 1111 1'11 1 111 1111 1 11 11 1111 11 111 1 1 11 1 11 1 11 1111 11 1 11 111 111 111 111 111 1 11 1 111 1l l ll l l l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l ll l l1 111 111 111 1 11 1 1l l tl l .l l ll l II II I II I II :: n orolhy fl . \" S<1y. ltay m on tl , ho w !lid yo u lil<r> th e pic Hull1 J . a nd T s li ]Jpecl ouL l o y ou '!\" Ra y m nnrl \" W ' II, 1 g uellH I I W<l fi n llriglll , i111L II i on k t'Cl m or e like a p Ull ('llkP than a pi<' ni'I Pr .Juno l{llY !Hl l 011 it. \"._. l ll l ll l ll l ll ll l llll !l l lll ll l ll l ll l l l ll l ll l ll l li l tl l l! l lt l ll l ll ll ll ll l II II I I. I HI II I II I 11 11 111 11 11II I 1I I II I II IIII II I !l l ll l ll l ll l l ll ll ll l l ll l lt l ll ll l l l l ll l ll l ll l il l ll l t\ l ll l ll l l l !l' BUILD Your house with cen1ent, lumber and plaster from our yards, use SHERWIN-WILLIAMS Paints, and then I~ eep it warm with C~~ st 1e Gate or Ki ng Co a1. YOl!R P 1TRON 1GE SOJ.JCITED Jensen & Kuhre Company SANDY, UTAII: 11 11 111 111 111 1111 1! 111 1 '! 1 11 11 1 111 11 111 1 I 11 111 11111 111 1 l l fl l ll l ll l ll l tl l ll l ll l ll l I I II I I 1 11 111 1 l l lt l li l ll l ll l fi i ii i ii i i\ I UI III II I II II II II I HI I1 111111 11 1111 111 1JI I JI I II 111 111 .-)'uge 0~