English Poetry- Evaluation and Feedback for Amaranthine by Dr Raygalla

NOVEMBER 2020 JURY PANEL Insight- Amaranthine Evaluation & Feedback of Poetry BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA

Outline This document will give you a complete insight of the evaluation process, parameters taken into account, stages of evaluation and some valuable feedback on each of your work. BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Most important aspects Rhyme Scheme Poetic Device Originality and Freedom Rhyme scheme is an integral part of Poetic Device as we know is a Poetic freedom is like poetic justice. It poetry, and if you wish to have this combination of a number of things. They means the word only—no real freedom aspect involved, then the rhyme should or justice at all. And originality is in the be there through out and cannot are essential tools that a poet uses to presentation and not in the idea, because discontinue in between. Maintaining an create rhythm, enhance a poem's every idea is a borrowed one. order is much needed. meaning, or intensify a mood or feeling. JURY PANEL BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA

Free Verse- Modern A short poetry glossary Free verse is a popular style of modern Stanza = a set amount of lines in poetry grouped poetry, and as its name suggests there is a together by their length, meter or rhyme scheme. fair amount of freedom when it comes to Couplet = a two-line stanza. writing a poem like this. Free verse can Tercet = a three-line stanza. rhyme or not, it can have as many lines or Quatrain = a four-line stanza. stanzas as the poet wants, and it can be Cinquain = a five-line stanza. about anything you like! So, while free verse Sestet = a six-line stanza. may sound simple enough, the lack of rules Meter = the pattern of stressed syllables (long- makes this form of poetry tricky to master! sounding) and unstressed syllables (short-sounding) in poetry. Other Ancient Types Rhyme scheme = the pattern of rhyme that comes at Haiku, Sonnet, Acrostic, Villanelle, Limerick, the end of each line or verse. Syllable = the single, Ode, Elegy, Ballad, Blank Verse, Epics, unbroken sound of a spoken or written word. Narrative, Pastoral, Lyric, Soliloquy JURY PANEL BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA

BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA 100TOTAL Various parameters are taken... A scale of 10 parameter was designed to evaluate the work submitted, as the work is not a professionally categorized, standard tools cannot be used, hence altered tools are used to evaluate. JURY PANEL

EVALUATION CRITERIA 100 TOTAL SCHEME RHYMNIG SCHEME 10 All the parameters are shown in the figure. OVER ALL STORY 15 ORIGINALITY & DICTION 20 POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 10 AESTHETICS 10 TITLING 10 CREATIVITY 10 PUNCTUATION 5 POETIC DEVICE 10 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Aadinath Ghatnekar CRITERIA 88 TOTAL TOTAL: 88/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 9 No pattern in punctuation, misuse of the comma, and OVER ALL STORY 13 full stop because each paragraph is essentially one sentence. So either use two commas and a full stop or ORIGINALITY & DICTION 20 none at all. Misuse of commas in the last paragraph. POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 9 Usage of informal words (u). Burrows and not borrows. The rhyme scheme makes use of a variety of AESTHETICS 8 words. The meter and flow of words are consistent, except in paragraph 3. The poem is reflective and the TITLING 7 short stagnant flow supports the feeling of Autumn. Can try to think and bring more content. Talk about CREATIVITY 8 more than actions and add emotions or sensations. PUNCTUATION 4 POETIC DEVICE 10 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Rohan Lahane CRITERIA 62 TOTAL TOTAL: 62/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 6 It seems that you have a very clear idea in mind, but OVER ALL STORY 9 rather than making it poetry, you have simply explained your idea. The rhyme scheme is good but ORIGINALITY & DICTION 13 the words seem forced and a little unnatural. It isn't necessary to use big complicated words for quality. POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 7 Word choice needs improvement, your idea is not put out well. AESTHETICS 6 TITLING 5 CREATIVITY 6 PUNCTUATION 3 POETIC DEVICE 7 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Saanvi Arora CRITERIA 64 TOTAL TOTAL: 64/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 8 Good rhyme scheme, great imagery and OVER ALL STORY 12 personification and realistic description in para 1. ORIGINALITY & DICTION 16 You lose the flow after para 1. Your thought is clear in the poem but because the reader assumes a lot. You POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 7 don't say something for yourself except talking about a second person. The effect is diluted by the second AESTHETICS 7 person. Construct a conversation first, not just add thoughts as you go. TITLING 0 Capitalization errors. Good thought and idea, CREATIVITY 5 structure and word choice needs improvement PUNCTUATION 4 POETIC DEVICE 5 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Sayantika Adhikary CRITERIA 59 TOTAL TOTAL: 59/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 5 Need improvement in cohesion, punctuation, and OVER ALL STORY 12 paragraphs. There is a rhyme scheme towards the end, therefore maintain a similar format throughout. ORIGINALITY & DICTION 12 The idea is thoughtful and new, but the presentation and structure dilute the message. POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 5 AESTHETICS 6 TITLING 6 CREATIVITY 5 PUNCTUATION 3 POETIC DEVICE 5 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Bhumi Surana CRITERIA 87 TOTAL TOTAL: 87/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 10 Autumn, not the autumn. The sky, not sky. Fulfillness OVER ALL STORY 20 isn't a word. Devising wisdom is a new concept, it's fresh. Great rhyme scheme and comparison. It might ORIGINALITY & DICTION 10 be helpful to organise lines differently, one long paragraph isn't a good look and discourages readers. POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 10 Still, this organisation works for the effect, and the poem has good effect and thoughts. Think of adding a AESTHETICS 9 title TITLING 0 CREATIVITY 10 PUNCTUATION 4 POETIC DEVICE 10 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Bhakti Patel TOTAL: 86/100 CRITERIA 86 TOTAL Can make it less clinical in places, for example by RHYMNIG SCHEME 9 writing \"biting and shivering\" and omitting causing. Spelling error para 2 (I, not is). Autumn, not the OVER ALL STORY 15 autumn. Incorrect direct speech punctuation. ORIGINALITY & DICTION 19 Great thought and presentation. The conversation is refreshing and effective. The grammatical errors dilute POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 10 the effect. Overall very realistic and not overly emotional. Good organisation of thoughts and ideas.) AESTHETICS 7 TITLING 6 CREATIVITY 8 PUNCTUATION 5 POETIC DEVICE 7 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Janhvi Goje CRITERIA 93 TOTAL TOTAL: 93/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 10 Organized punctuation, clear thoughts. Effective OVER ALL STORY 13 imagery and rhyme scheme, realistic ideas. Organized paragraphs and overall good presentation, but lacks ORIGINALITY & DICTION 20 the warmth of an experience you've had. Perhaps try writing about what you've experienced. Using big POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 9 complicated words isn't necessary for quality. AESTHETICS 9 TITLING 9 CREATIVITY 10 PUNCTUATION 4 POETIC DEVICE 9 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Ishita Vikhona CRITERIA 98 TOTAL TOTAL: 98/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 9 It's a new perspective on Autumn. Your idea is clear, OVER ALL STORY 15 but the way you write blurs lines into one. Try channelling the emotion into poetry rather than ORIGINALITY & DICTION 20 ranting without design. POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 10 Overall good punctuation, grammar and ideas. Better than average structure, and the idea of thinking of a AESTHETICS 9 poem in a poem is new and fresh. TITLING 10 Good rhyme scheme. The poetry is realistic, like it's happening as I read. Can improve word choice and CREATIVITY 10 structure PUNCTUATION 5 POETIC DEVICE 10 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Simran Anand Joshi CRITERIA 81 TOTAL TOTAL: 81/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 9 Great rhyme scheme, great inclusion of fact and OVER ALL STORY 12 opinion. Good punctuation and very organized structure. Good word choice. However, the poem is ORIGINALITY & DICTION 17 very clinical and lacks emotion. It isn't persuasive, at least for me. POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 8 Can add anecdotes, give readers a reason to plant AESTHETICS 8 trees apart from the obvious. The title is save trees but you write about planting them, so choose and TITLING 5 stick to a thought CREATIVITY 9 PUNCTUATION 5 POETIC DEVICE 8 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Yashowardhan Thakre CRITERIA 74 TOTAL TOTAL: 74/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 9 In Autumn, not the autumn. A sketch or sketches, not OVER ALL STORY 13 sketch. Is like a pencil or maybe like a pencil. Incorrect grammar, mainly missing 'be' verb. Good ORIGINALITY & DICTION 13 structure. Great use of the chorus. Aim at consistent spacing. Clear thoughts, great word choice. Has a POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 8 personal feeling, warm and realistic AESTHETICS 9 TITLING 0 CREATIVITY 9 PUNCTUATION 5 POETIC DEVICE 8 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Uttara CRITERIA 95 TOTAL TOTAL: 95/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 8 Very touching poem. Very realistic and effective word OVER ALL STORY 15 choice. No grammatical errors. Very organized and use of anecdotes is well ordered. Good rhyme ORIGINALITY & DICTION 20 scheme. Punctuation error in commas: the space is never before, only after. POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 8 From a literary perspective, you can think of more AESTHETICS 10 anecdotes and expand. This is great as of now TITLING 10 CREATIVITY 10 PUNCTUATION 4 POETIC DEVICE 10 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

Fatin Osmani CRITERIA 83 TOTAL TOTAL: 83/100 RHYMNIG SCHEME 8 Calmness amongst/amid chaos: remove the. Incorrect OVER ALL STORY 12 sentence structure in multiple places. ORIGINALITY & DICTION 19 Good rhyme and meter. Try to make paragraphs. Good punctuation. Great word choice. Good POETIC ELEMENT OF FREEDOM 8 expression of emotion and personification. AESTHETICS 8 There is a real connection between you and the leaf, and it brings emotion to the reader. It's a new TITLING 6 perspective on Autumn, very well put CREATIVITY 9 PUNCTUATION 4 POETIC DEVICE 9 BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA JURY PANEL

BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA Overall Performance What we did right All the participants have immense potential. Most of their work speaks volumes about their involvedness and passion for writing. While a few sound like attempts to set some standards; there are a few that need t focus on some serious improvement. All of you must work on ideation and should develop a habit of reading others work (poetry) and taking constant feedback about what you write is the key to improve and evolve as a writer/ poet. JURY PANEL

In order to succeed, we must first believe that we can.\" — Nikos Kazantzakis BY DR KALYAN SRINIVAS RAYGALLA +91 8790 81 3376 [email protected]