Cosmopolitan USA I4 2022_downmagaz.net

LIFE STUFF Cosmo’s Must-Visit List 1 23 1. Bryce’s trails are somehow even more scenic on horseback. 2. The Queen’s Garden Trail has hoodoos and towering trees. 3. You can soak up all the summer-camp feels at Yonder Escalante. 4. Behold: Bryce Canyon National Park, also known as “not Mars.” THIS PAGE: GETTY IMAGES (IMAGE 1); MARY FAMA (IMAGE 2); COURTESY YONDER ESCALANTE (IMAGES 3 AND 4). OPPOSITE PAGE: COURTESY YONDER ESCALANTE. No shame to the Grand Canyon, but sometimes you just need Where to Stay a national park not overrun with tour buses and selfie sticks. But also a national park that’s close to legitimately good food Unless you are planning on camping (hey, to each their own), and legitimately cool lodging (you know, if pitching a tent isn’t the Lodge at Bryce Canyon is your only actual-room-with-an- your thing). In short, what you need is Bryce Canyon. About a actual-bed option for sleeping inside the park. The area was four-hour drive from the Salt Lake City and Las Vegas airports, recently certified as an International Dark Sky Park, meaning the national park, with its fantastical rock formations known as there’s little light pollution and incredible stargazing. Otherwise, hoodoos, is as of yet relatively uncrowded. Keep reading to get a 50ish-minute drive along Scenic Byway 12 puts you at Yonder ready to strap on your Tevas for epic hikes, magical night skies, Escalante, an oasis of stylish cabins, retrofitted Airstreams, and alfresco eating, and next-level glamping. spa-like bathhouses (there’s a retro drive-in movie theater too). The staff sells s’mores and cocktail kits and will light your camp- fire for you. Where to Eat Of course, you could rough it with beef jerky and trail mix…or you could start your day at Bryce Canyon Coffee Co., in the nearby town of Tropic, for the best coffee around. (Bonus: Its banana bread is baked by a local teacher who has a very loyal follow- ing.) You can get grab-and-go pizza, soup, and sandwiches at the General Store before or after hikes or load up on pulled pork and mac and cheese from outside-the-park I.D.K. Barbecue. Book sit-down meal reservations ahead of time for the Stone Hearth Grille, a scenic spot where tired explorers sit back and cut into juicy strip steaks or whipped-tofu-stuffed poblano peppers. Where to Play You can navigate Bryce Canyon National Park by foot, bike, vehi- cle, or even horseback—and really, you should try at least two of those options. The easiest involves taking a free shuttle to the most popular viewpoints or doing a 38-mile scenic drive in your car to every vista, making sure to linger at Sunrise Point, Sunset Point, and Inspiration Point. Hiking among the hoodoos is also a must, and when combined, the Queen’s Garden and Navajo Loop Trails offer the best intro to Bryce in under three hours. You’ll work your way down into the canyon and pass limestone arches, pine forests, and rock formations with intimidating names like Thor’s Hammer. End your trip with some stargazing under cozy blankets 4 or plan your visit around one of the park’s Full Moon Hikes. Find your next ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 49 next trip right here.

LIFE STUFF Free Therapy So Should I Just… Keep Watching My Friend Mess Up? It’s all about perspective—and boundaries, says our advice columnist, therapist Minaa B. ILLUSTRATIONS BY HOI CHAN 50 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

Dear Minaa, Dear Reader, One of my best friends from college and I are still close, but our friendship has First, you should know it’s normal and healthy for friendships to change changed a lot over the past few years. I think part of it stems from her spending over time. That’s especially true for friends who meet in college. At most of the pandemic alone and feeling isolated. that stage, you were still trying to figure out what you wanted your We talk a lot about how frustrated lives to look like—and that was likely very different from where you’re she is with her dating life and how she’s recently taken steps to ensure that she both at right now. can be a parent without a partner. Lately, she’s been playing with the idea of start- I also want to normalize what your friend has gone through since ing IVF soon-ish—and she just turned 30. In my opinion, she’s getting a bit ahead the pandemic started: All of the things coming to the surface for of herself. her—dealing with loneliness, frustrations with dating, thinking more Another change: She’s making an effort to stand up to toxic people in her life seriously about parenting—came up for many people during the and let them know how they’ve wronged her. Now, most of our conversations center past couple of years. And it sounds like she’s now doing the things on how she plans to call them out or on rehashing these bad interactions over and she genuinely believes will make her happier in the end. over again. The thing I’m curious about is the way you feel her decisions have While I’m happy to see she’s taking charge of her life, I’m worried she’s creat- affected your relationship or even you personally. The next time she ing new problems that will have a negative impact on her mental health. I should say fills you in on everything going on in her life, try to sit with any upset- that she does see a therapist regularly, takes mental-health-related medication, ting feelings that arise and ask yourself, What’s at the root of these and, in theory, prioritizes her emotional well-being. But even so, her overall person- emotions? Am I uncomfortable with her dumping her problems on ality has shifted to become more nega- tive and generally angry at the world. me, or is it the fact that she’s doing something I don’t agree with? It’s gotten to the point where I’ve been thinking about spending some time away If you realize that her unloading on you every time you hang out from her. is the issue, it might be time to set some boundaries. You can start Honestly, I think she’s getting in the way of her own happiness—and that’s hard to by saying, “You know, when you talk about all these negative issues, be around and upsetting to witness—but is it my place to say anything? If not, what it’s really emotionally overwhelming and I feel like it’s impacting our can I do to support her? relationship.” It’s a tough conversation to have, but it can help you preserve the other parts of your friendship. Or maybe it’s not the problem-dumping that’s bothering you. Maybe it’s that she’s doing things you totally disagree with. When friends share stuff, they’re inviting us into their business. So you’re welcome to give your opinion about whatever it is she brings up— and maybe doing so will make you feel better. Like, if she says she’s decided to start IVF, you could reply, “I think you’re doing this too soon and you should give yourself more time to think this through.” That’s a normal and healthy conversation—just reassure her that you’re not judging, you support her, and you only want to be truthful. If she doesn’t take your advice and you’re upset by that, Who gets to dig deeper into your reaction. It likely has more to do with your emotions than your friend’s choices. You ask if she’s getting determine in the way of her own happiness, but who gets to determine what makes what makes your friend happy? Are you projecting what you her happy? think happiness looks like onto your friend? I also wonder if you feel like you need to rescue her or fix things for her? But even though it can feel scary (for both of you), your friend has to make her own decisions and learn from whatever happens next. If her actions do end up creating new problems or negatively impacting her mental health, that’s on your friend. It’s not your responsibility. Listen, you’re not a bad person for wanting your friend to do what you think is best for her. Ultimately, you love her and want to protect her. But it sounds like she’s doing what she thinks is best for her, and I’d love for you to see her decisions from that perspective instead of from a place of fear or worry. Overall, you two would definitely benefit from more open and honest conversations while staying mindful of your boundaries and hers. That’s the best way to help her right now. MINAA B., LMSW, is a therapist, writer, and speaker and the founder of Minaa B. Consulting, where she works with busy professionals on enhancing their well-being and developing workplace boundaries to improve their mental health. She is a cohost on Sydel Curry-Lee’s podcast Because Life and sits on the mental health advisory committee for Wondermind, a mental-fitness company cofounded by Selena Gomez. Have a question for Minaa? ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 51 Scan here to ask it.

LIFE STUFF It ’s Personal M y name is Hope Blanchard, and I’m a country-pop musician. Ten years from now, I hope I won’t have to say that or to introduce myself at all. I’m hoping Hope Blanchard will be a household name. I have a lot of goals: I want to be on all the music charts, I want to win Gram- mys, I want to play stadiums. I want to sell out stadiums. I’m doing whatever it takes to make that happen, and since 2019, “whatever it takes” has meant leaving my “normal” life behind. But let me back up for a minute to explain that singing—wanting to do it everywhere, all the time—is something I feel in my soul. When I was little, I would invite people to my grandparents’ house for dinner so I could corner them and perform. I never got great grades in school (I’m dyslexic), but making music has always made me feel smart. No matter the stage, every time I get off it, I’m think- ing about the next time I can get back on again. It just feels right, and I want to reach people with my songs, just like artists like Taylor Swift reached me as a girl. I married my husband, Mitch, who’s also a musician, when I was 18. We lived in a house in his home state of Iowa for a year before moving into a one-bedroom apart- ment in Nashville so we could be closer to the music industry. But Nashville rents are expensive, and we found ourselves exhausted from long days of managing other musicians to make money and from I Sold Everything I Owned long nights at the studio working on our to Pursue Country Music Fame and It Was Actually Worth It own music. I knew it wasn’t sustainable. I was barely focusing on my own passion, and paying for a place we barely spent any time at felt like a mistake. I’d been seeing this trend on Pinter- est where people live in vans so they can MITCH GOUDY. Think #VanLife but with a (very ambitious) mission. travel full-time. And one day it hit me: Why couldn’t we do that too? Except instead of BY HOPE BLANCHARD AS TOLD TO HANNAH CHUBB traveling, we could stay in Nashville, using 52 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4 So you can say, “Oh, I knew Hope when...”:



our income for recording instead of FROM TOP: MAKENNA DAY; MATTIE O’NEILL; MITCH GOUDY (2). rent. (FYI, making an album is super expensive. Mine cost $20,000.) I showed Mitch some Pinterest pictures, and within minutes, we were on the phone with a dealer- ship. I remember bawling because I was just so excited by the poten- tial of it all. A few days later, we were test-driving vans, and by the end of the month, just before my 20th birthday, we were driving to Ohio to buy one (after convincing our parents we weren’t out of our minds). Moving into a literal van is not easy. I had arrived at our first house in Iowa with 10 tote bags full of shoes—no exaggeration; I love cowboy boots—and even though we’d already scaled down for Nashville, fitting our entire lives into 70 square feet was stressful as hell. To make it work, we sold pretty much everything we owned: most of our clothes, our furniture, our car. Then we built out the van ourselves, relying on YouTube videos and luck. (The day Mitch cut a hole in the roof to install a vent fan was…terrifying.) It’s certainly not luxurious, but now, that van is home. It’s basically a bed with a kitchen. There’s a toilet too, but we only use it for emergencies. I shower at whichever Planet Fitness loca- tion is closest to me that day or at the music studio, where I spend a lot of my time. Most nights, we sleep outside a Cracker Barrel or Walmart (fun fact: both tend to offer free RV parking in their lots). I still help manage two artists in order to bring in some money, but otherwise, I get to spend all day, It’s certainly not luxurious, but now, that van is home.

LIFE STUFF It ’s Personal From top: Onstage in Nashville; with my husband, Mitch, in Joshua Tree, California; seeing a physical copy of my EP for the first time; with our pup, Ocean, in the van. every day writing and recording music and performing wherever I can. (No need to budget for a hotel room on tour when you have a van!) I put out my first EP in Septem- ber 2021. It’s a mix of five songs— some are perfect for tipsy nights at the bar; others speak to my hope- fully relatable past struggles. I’m also releasing a new single this June that will be on my next EP. And earlier this year, we shot and edited three music videos in just three weeks (like, what?). I never would have been able to do any of this if we were still living a more traditional life. I’m just so proud of what I’ve been able to accomplish since going all in on myself. People I meet around town always say, “Oh, I’m so sorry,” when I tell them that I live in a van. But I know that’s because they don’t understand that this was a choice. I still make decent money—I’m just opting to invest it in myself instead of stuff. Sure, I miss deco- rating, hoarding accessories, and having a backyard, and I can’t exactly spread out and watch all the Netflix I want, but these are sacrifices I’m willing to make. I get to chase my dream, and I’ve never been happier. I may not have thousands of monthly Spotify listeners or that Grammy just yet, but every day, I feel like I’m getting a little closer to seeing my name in lights. And if you’ve read this far, maybe you’ll want to hear my music and you’ll remember my name. It’s Hope for a reason. ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 55

LIFE STUFF Make a Decision Do I Suck How many hours of sleep do Do you have a at Sleeping? you typically get? screen policy at night? No judgment here, just No more It varies, but By “pol- I mean, I try important answers. than six. always at icy,” do to charge least eight. you mean my phone BY HANNAH SMOTHERS scrolling in another TikTok? room.… START How often do you say, “Ugh, I did not sleep well last night”? Kind of a lot. Once in a Are you an early riser? But maybe while, like when my inbox I’m just is overflowing. dramatic? Is noon Oh, yeah. early? Big 7 a.m. SoulCycle Do you have a set bedtime? person. It’s usually Yes. Nothing is after Netflix more impor- asks if I’m tant than still watch- bedtime. ing (for the fourth time). 56 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

Do you avoid alcohol Do you have a caffeine cutoff When you wake up in the before bed? time during the day? middle of the night, you: Too many Haha. How dare Sure, at least Put on a Scroll Think about margs = ter- Maybe on you? I love most days podcast, TikTok a meeting rible sleep. weekdays? but avoid (again). the next lattes. (unless I’m on a my phone day until I tight deadline). otherwise. do or don’t fall back asleep. Are you a midnight snacker? Do you take Do you get anxious afternoon naps? at night around bedtime? I love Nah, I know Everyone Almost Yes. Like, Yes, but mochi by late-night knows I *need* never. only in bed I’m always moonlight! snacks just my post-work anxious? keep me up. though. naps. B A You get an email from your boss What’s the first thing you do when after you’re already in bed. You: you wake up in the morning? Do you enable your “do not disturb” mode at night? Answer Read it, I don’t I can’t afford Yes, and Check my Stretch- right away, and vow check to miss it’s a game phone—it’s ing, deep to respond email at changer. right here breathing, duh. bedtime! anything. breakfast, in in the B under that order. A morning. C A my pillow. B AC IBAI ACEVEDO/STOCKSY UNITED. Sorry, but you Honestly, you could be Nope—look A kind of do. B resting better. C at you! Just to state the obvious, your late-night Real talk: Sometimes you’re just too You’re among the few who follow much scrolling or snacking or other not-great sleep busy and it’s your sleep that takes the of the leading sleep hygiene advice (at hygiene habits aren’t doing you any favors. hit. Here’s the thing though...when this least most of the time). You aim for no And look, we get it: Life basically conspires happens, it could throw off your sleep caffeine past a certain hour, no booze to force us into these bad practices. But you quality for weeks (!), leaving you irri- before bed, no stressful after-hours can start getting better rest by establishing table and exhausted. Small changes work...are you even human? JK, good a routine and sticking to it—every single like avoiding your phone at night (yes, for you—in fact, great for you. Your night. That could mean taking a hot shower, including work emails), switching to enviable sleep routine is working won- drinking a cup of herbal tea, bingeing some only water in the afternoon, and ders, and sticking to it can help you feel Bravo, and climbing into bed. Once you’re avoiding late-afternoon naps can rested and refreshed. If you ever want on a roll, it’s time to stash away your phone make a big difference. The important to challenge yourself to go even further (that stuff about blue light and sleep disrup- thing about sleep routines is that they (and seriously, you don’t *need* to), tion is real). If all else fails, consider visiting a are routines. Try to stick to the same why not try keeping a dream journal sleep specialist, who can uncover the roots sequence—even if it begins a little or chilling out with a meditation prac- of what’s really keeping you up. later than usual. tice before bed? SOURCE: MELISSA RUSSIANO, A CALIFORNIA-BASED LICENSED CLINICAL SOCIAL WORKER P.S. These dreamy bedroom accessories could also help.

LIFE STUFF Best of the Best PET 2022 AW A R DS The 2022 1 Cosmo Pet Awards FASHION STYLIST: EUNICE BRUNO. ZANIES TENNIS BALL, $12, SHOPDOGANDCO.COM. An expertly curated list of picks for your very best friend. BY JESSICA GOODMAN PHOTOGRAPHS BY BETH SACCA 58 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

TRAVEL LIKE AN EDITOR HELL M ANN’S® REAL M AYONNAISE www.hellmanns.com NEW LOOK. BETTER SLEEP. Womenshealthmag.com/eyewear

LIFE STUFF Best of the Best 1. BEST DOG OUTFIT 2 Gauntlett Cheng collar, $85, sweater, $105, gauntlett Chances are, if you’re reading this, you’re cheng.com currently cuddled up somewhere with your very good boy or girl, whispering sweet noth- ABBY SILVERMAN, “This sweater is light- ings in that special voice you use when it’s just the two of you. It’s also likely that you’re digital creative weight enough for always on the hunt for new toys, treats, director, grooming items, and other fun stuff to keep Cosmopolitan all seasons, and the them super happy (or just occupied while you try to ace the whole work-from-home thing). matching collar makes Cosmo turned to animal lovers with impec- it a full-on ’fit. It’s cable taste (groomers, influencers, our own pet-obsessed staffers, and more) for their exactly the pop of color hands-down must-have products. From the game-changingly clever to the too-pretty-to- my always-photo-ready pass-up, here are this year’s winners. pup (for proof, please 60 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4 see @PennyLane_ Sheepadoodle on IG) needs this season.” 2. BEST CAT BED Mau Strato bed, $399, maupets.com CHRIS DEAN, “For cats who love managing editor, crawling into tiny little Cosmopolitan spaces (so, basically all cats), this wood- and-plush combo is a winner. The fact that it actually looks cool in your living room is an (important) added bonus.” PET 3. BEST CAT SWEATER 2022 Giu Giu x KkCo turtleneck, AW A R DS $270, giugiu.world 3 BETH SACCA, “I know not all cats are assistant down to wear clothes, visual editor, Cosmopolitan but mine legitimately loves putting on this cozy turtleneck. He just looks so proud of him- self! It’s thick enough that it’ll hold up for years, and the colors look great with any type of fur.” 4. BEST GROOMING SET Gerrard Larriett Aromather- apy Pet Spa in a Box Gift Set, $29, gerrardlarriett.com ASHLEY ANN, “The shampoo leaves my celebrity pet dog’s coat shiny and soft, stylist (@Grooming Extraordinaire) and the detangling spray really helps comb and brush out fur easily without any greasy, sticky residue.”

5. BEST TREAT TOY 9. BEST COLLAR 10. BEST CAT TREAT AND LEASH SET The Starmark Everlasting Purina Fancy Feast Treat Bento Ball, $16, Gucci collar, $500, Savory Cravings cat treats, starmarkacademy.com leash, $660, bag holder, $7, petco.com $450, gucci.com CAROLINE MOSS, “This ball houses a SAMI ROBERTS, “These are like the cat beauty assistant, equivalent of chocolate, author and replaceable treat that ANDREA ZENDEJAS, “As an accessories host of the Gee Cosmopolitan except beef-, crab-, Thanks, Just Bought your dog has to really senior accessories expert and dog mom, I and salmon-flavored. editor, My kitty goes for them It! podcast work to get little pieces Cosmopolitan was so excited to see harder than any of her other treats. They also (@GeeThanks of. When you want 45 Gucci expanding into have a super-short JustBoughtItPod) mins of peace and quiet, ingredients list, which the pet category. This I love.” it does the trick. It also combo definitely makes somehow smells delight- a statement.” ful, which is not some- thing I often say about chicken-flavored things meant for slobbering.” 6. BEST ROPE TOY A WHOLE NEW LEVEL OF FANCY Knots of Fun Tug Toy, $10, Our models went all out for this shoot happyhandshappydogs.com thanks to the pros at BFF Pet Wash in Brooklyn. The secret to this mani? Dog- ANDREA ARDEN, “It’s the perfect length to specific nontoxic polish (they recommend Warren London Pawdicure Polish Pen, $9, founder of allow for plenty of space chewy.com). Yes, you read that right. Andrea Arden Dog Training in between where you New York City hold on to one end and (@AndreaArden where the dog grabs the DogTraining) other, which is espe- cially important for pup- pies who have not yet developed good eye- mouth coordination.” 7. BEST PET DRYER THIS PAGE, ON MODEL: MARIA LA ROSA SOCKS, $29, MARIALAROSA .IT; G.H. BASS ORIGINALS WEEJUNS, $135, GHBASS.COM. Hands-Free Duz Dryer, $220, OPPOSITE PAGE: PAGERIE COLLAR, $310, PAGERIE.COM. en.duzdryer.com ARISA THOMAS, “It can be a nightmare to pet stylist at dry and brush your dog Blue Pooch Salon in Los Angeles simultaneously. This (@Arisa allows you to cut drying 9 TheGroomer) time in half by letting you use your hands to brush or towel-dry your small pets. It’s also super quiet so as not to scare anxious pets.” 8. BEST DE-SHEDDER Furminator De-Shedding Cat Tool, $43, amazon.com SABAA TAHIR, “My cat Samothrace is a #1 New York huge fan of the Furmi- Times best-selling author of nator. She’s a Siberian, All My Rage which means she has a (@SabaaTahir) very thick coat and undercoat. The Furmi- nator is strong enough to get out stubborn mats but gentle enough that Sami doesn’t want to rip my face off when I use it— she’ll sometimes even purr if I get an itchy spot.”

LIFE STUFF Best of the Best 13 13. BEST DOG ROBE Versace bathrobe, $250, versace.com MALLORY “Allow me to argue ROYNON, that this is a thing your creative director, Cosmopolitan dog needs. Okay, fine, ‘needs’ is a strong word, but just think how pre- cious they’d look loung- ing in it post-bathtime?” 14. BEST SUPPLEMENT Intesto-Guard™ 180g Pro- biotic Powder for Pets, $66, intesto-guard.com AZIZA GLASS, “This has a proprietary 12 DVM, CVA, blend of probiotics, pre- veterinarian, of biotics, and IgY, which PET all help to maintain DisneyNow’s good gut health. I use 2022 Roman to it with pets who have AW A R DS the Rescue (@AzizaGlass) diarrhea and sensitive stomachs.” [Editor’s note: Of course, check with your own vet first!] 15. BEST HANDS-FREE LEASH The Lofty Leash adjustable leash, $35, theloftyleash.com KASSIDI JONES, “I love that I don’t have social justice to sacrifice my hands advocate and creator just to take my dog for a of the Black Pet walk. When we’re in a IGs list and store and I need to keep @Gingers_Naps her close to me, I can clip it around my torso to shorten her reach.” 11. BEST WATER 12. BEST PLUSH TOY 16. BEST DOG TREAT LOUIS VUITTON COLLAR, $345, LOUISVUITTON.COM. DISPENSER P. L. A. Y. dog toy, $12, shop Greenies Blueberry Petlibro water fountain, $30, dogandco.com Teenie Dental Chews, $14, petlibro.com greenies.com EMMA BATY, “The cuteness of this DANA TRUITT “It’s fun and colorful, and entertainment pup-arazzi moment is MADELEINE “I lowkey wish humans editor, FELDMAN, it holds three to four days’ Cosmopolitan almost too much to FRANK REEVES, could also clean our pet and lifestyle articles director, influencer worth of water so I’m not handle. Highly recom- Cosmopolitan teeth by snacking, but (@DanaStargazer refilling daily. It also runs mend gifting it to that at least our dogs get Truitt and the water through a filtra- new-pet-parent friend to. My pug goes wild @PiperThePin) tion system. Plus, my dog who you already know for the blueberry fla- loves it, and anything that is going to make their vor, and I love that they makes her happy and dog the next big thing smell so much better my life easier is a win-win.” on Instagram.” than most dog treats.” 62 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4 Fill your cart with even more pet presents:



Romance Isn’t Dead Pretty Little Things A Vintage Sex Moment Page 65 Page 68 Page 70 love stuff You’re gonna wanna pull up a seat to *this* bacchanal.

LOVE STUFF For the Record Chapter 3: Life Is a (Twisted?) Fairy Tale In the latest installment of our dating series, columnist Zara Field* finds herself in some very unusual situations...and maybe even catching feelings? ILLUSTRATIONS BY THE SCISSORHANDS TUESDAY, 7 A.M. Now it’s dinner party time, and while I never thought I could make a convincing Snow White, I am ~feeling myself~ My throat is on fire. I’m in urgent care, enjoying the ASMR of in this cropped wig. I even borrowed a friend’s red bow tie the nurse’s nails clickety-clacking my symptoms into the patient and affixed it to the wig to achieve Snow’s signature look. It’s dashboard. I’ve already tested, and it’s not Covid. “Any recent called innovation. sexual activity?” she asks. And...wow. No one does a tablescape quite like my friend Her judgy tone reminds me of Roz from Monsters, Inc. Amaya. She isn’t a professional party planner, but she should Should I tell her that I gave a 30-minute blow job to the hot be. She’s brought the Grimms’ fairy tales to life: glittering Marine I met last weekend (remember him? And his Quantico- candles, forest-themed table decor, test-tube shots labeled esque make-out moves?) and now my throat feels like the Hulk with storybook poisons and potions. The meal is a whirlwind has ripped right through it? of debauchery, toasts, roasts, and laughter. In all seriousness, though, I have heard there’s a chlamydia SATURDAY, 11 P.M. outbreak ravaging the city right now. I get regular STI tests and ask my partners to do the same, and so far, *knock on There’s a silent disco. anything but morning wood* I have never gotten one. But as a hypochondriac, I’m constantly self-diagnosing. SUNDAY, 2 A.M. The nurse with the glaring RBF gives me a rapid strep test. I’m exhausted. I’ve been dancing a little too long for someone Positive. Seriously? I mean, it’s preferable to the alternatives, who’s sober, on antibiotics, and on East Coast time. but I feel like strep—like Lunchables or Gushers—just isn’t socially acceptable to get as an adult. I guess I’ll just take my I exit the main house at the same time as one of the many antibiotics prescription and side-eye to go, thanks. “Prince Charming” characters. He sat next to me at dinner and we did make out a little earlier. It’s drizzling and we’re As I’m leaving, I get a text from Steve, the Marine. “Zara. laughing about something random when, suddenly, I slip on Saturday was too much fun. Cancel your upcoming trip to the damp, rocky terrain. California.” He says he’ll be back in New York this weekend. (Side note: Do I need to reply that I have strep? No, right, For a good 30 seconds, I’m silently struggling to get up, because it’s not an STI? Or yes because it’s transmissible and because as a feminist, I’m committed to standing up on my if I got it, he might have too? This seems like a moral gray area, own. I cannot handle the indignity of a man dressed as so I’m going with no.) FUCKING PRINCE CHARMING carrying me THROUGH THE FUCKING WOODS to get to my FUCKING COTTAGE while “And miss out on debuting my Snow White costume?” I I’m dressed as FUCKING SNOW WHITE. respond instead. My friends are planning a Brothers Grimm– themed dinner party at an Airbnb compound in California Yet neither my ankle nor gravity seems to be working in my wine country, and everyone is coming as a storybook char- favor. The prince can’t seem to believe it either. “Can you really acter. It’s going to be exactly as over the top as it sounds. And not get up?” he asks. But no, this is not a move...I literally can’t. no, I won’t be contagious. Ugh. I only chose to dress as Snow White because I already owned a skintight blue velvet dress...not because I wanted to I let Steve know that the timing isn’t going to work out since live out her female fragility. I should have come as Rumpel- I leave Friday. “I guess you’ll just have to be the one that got stiltskin. Maybe then I’d be leaving with gold. Or Bitcoin. away,” he replies. The prince scoops me up and fireman-carries me up two SATURDAY, 6 P.M. flights of stairs to the single room that three of my friends and I are sharing. He puts me on the air mattress on the My N95’ed self got to the West Coast last night, but finishing the floor, takes off his shirt, and lies next to me. He does have full round of these antibiotics is knocking me on my ass. Thank- fully, I’m staying in a cabin slightly down the road from the main building, so no one noticed that I passed the fuck out at 8 p.m. *As usual, all the names in this story have been changed. ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 65

LOVE STUFF For the Record SATURDAY, 10 P.M. some of the nicest arm muscles I’ve ever seen. But as much It was actually eye-opening talking more about our respec- as I’m feeling this damsel-in-distress moment more than I’d tive work over dinner. Because mine involves emotional like to admit (still a feminist, but a horny one), I don’t think warfare like navigating through office politics, and his we’re actually that into each other. We’ve ended up in this involves...actual warfare. position by default, as the only two single people at this event. And to me, that’s not reason enough for a hookup. That said, Soon, we’re standing outside the restaurant. It’s one there’s no harm in snuggling. I do a one-footed wiggle out of of those fake-out spring nights where you think it’s warm, my costume and curl up next to him. File this under “mostly don’t wear a jacket, and suddenly are thrust back into what platonic topless spooning.” feels like a winter chill. I start shivering. He wraps his arms around me and kisses me gently outside. Where do we go SUNDAY, 11 A.M. now? Not his barracks. Not my friend’s place. “Hotel?” “Let’s do it.” Someone walks into the room, waking the five of us up. We are woefully past checkout time. Our cottage looks like the We’ve barely gotten through the hotel door and he starts inspiration for an old Kesha video. Glitter everywhere. Trash taking off my clothes with a level of urgency that I deeply everywhere. I try to get up. Yup, definitely injured. respect. I think we’re at DEFCON 1 on the desire scale. Steve And still topless. is 6'3\" and has spent a good chunk of the past month training in the wilderness carrying very heavy gear. He picks me up with less effort than I probably exert lifting my work I’ll be good to go. contribute that much. He fully takes control, moving my limbs exactly THREE WEEKS LATER, as he wants them and correctly SATURDAY, 9 A.M. taking my moans as signs to keep going. We have sex four times. I’m visiting friends in D.C. and Can someone explain to me why thinking, Quantico is close, I’ve been dating older men for isn’t it? Steve and I have been so long when I could have been texting this entire time. He is dating younger men with better an hour away and wants to stamina? I’m seriously reevalu- take me “on a real date.” ating every choice I’ve made for the past 10-plus years. He proposes an array of athletic activities. “I like to SUNDAY, 11 A.M. be outdoors in a stationary capacity,” I reply, rejecting “I wish I didn’t have to go back,” the pitch for a hike. “Like on he whispers as he tucks a piece a beach chair somewhere of my hair behind my ear. glamorous with a cocktail?” he asks. Now I feel seen. We I didn’t think I would get decide on dinner. so attached to my Marine so quickly. But I guess my sexual SATURDAY, 3 P.M. awakening did coincide with watching Heath Ledger in The “I made a reservation for 8 p.m.,” he texts, saying he’ll borrow Patriot. Something about Steve’s hot soldier vibes does it for a friend’s car and pick me up. “Do you want to give me grid me. Also the finger he stuck in my butt during round three coordinates?” Yeah, I don’t speak military. (which, I was told, after literally phoning a friend, being put on speaker unknowingly during a group brunch, and Me: “Maybe I’ll just make you a treasure map.” crowdsourcing the term from a tipsy but enthusiastic crew, is Steve: “As long as there’s a prize at the end.” called “corkscrewing”). Me: “Like a Nobel Prize? Can’t make any promises.” Steve: “I was thinking more like a kiss.” MONDAY, 2 P.M. He drives up just a few hours later, holding the most beau- tiful flowers I’ve ever seen. “I’m old-school,” he blushes as I’m back in New York and I get a text from Ethan, the male half he hands me the bouquet. He’s romantic, I’ll give him that. of the couple I had the threesome with several weeks back: In return, I hand him a single melting Hershey’s Kiss. “Your “Hey! Want to join us tomorrow for a play party?” kiss, officer.” (It seemed way funnier when I was buying it at the drugstore.) First of all, what exactly does that entail? Second of all, on a Tuesday? Let me check my schedule.... 66 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4 Chapters 1 and 2 for your reading pleasure:

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LOVE STUFF Sex Tip Time Machine The Sex Tips That BY Made Cosmo Famous VERONICA LOPEZ And by “famous,” we mean ~infamous~. PHOTOGRAPHS BY BETH SACCA The Good The Genuinely Bad Get a little rough with his manhood. Really grab on to it like you’re milking a cow. —January 2005 Say this to your partner in bed: “How can something so good be non-fattening?” —January 1972 Hold a string of pearls in your hand, squeeze WOMAN HOLDING MAGAZINE: © FOCUS FILMS/EVERETT COLLECTION. some lube over it, and roll the pearls up and down his penis. —December 2000 Get a book of erotica Wear a white tee Go to a bar that or a novel with sexy scenes to bed, then has a pool table, darts, and ask him to read have him suck on or bowling, and a particularly hot passage your nipples through make bedroom bets before the game begins— to you out loud. the fabric. a massage —February 2017 —April 2017 for you, a striptease for him–and whoever Have him rub a metal spoon over your nipples. The metal feels cool and erotic against your skin. wins gets their fantasy fulfilled later. —September 2010 —February 2016 70 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

The year was 1965, a time before a “sex tip” was even really a thing and especially before a national media outlet could publish any of them exclusively for women. But in her wisdom, our legendary editor, Helen Gurley Brown, said (or at least we like to think she said): “Fuck that.” And so publish sex tips for women we did, and have proudly continued to do ever since. Because good sex isn’t just about satisfaction, it’s about equality, which we see bear out time and again. So we’ll continue to beat this drum—worry not. Hell, sometimes we’ll beat it so enthusiastically that it results in the true gems on these pages, highlights from our back issues that run the gamut from the hilarious to the dated to the “still holds up” to the “why the hell did we say that.” Nothing like your own archives to keep you honest! The “Wow, Okay!” Suck on a candy cane, then Color your nipples trace his coronal ridge— with a crazy-colored the edge of the head of lipstick, like sparkly purple. He’ll love the shocking, his penis—with your tongue. sexy change in scenery. The cool, pepperminty sensation will make him —March 2012 tingle all over. —December 2015 To turn a man on, Freeze some grapes in a Ziploc bag ask him to help and put them in your mouth once you....Ask him for they’re ice-cold. Then begin oral sex. advice, to explain things to you. —March 1998 —April 1968 Eat more frozen yogurt— Use perfume mixed with Hold his penis Stick his penis through the low-fat dairy slashes belly secretions from wild ani- in one hand, and hole of a glazed doughnut. fat, and pudge in that area mals, like musk or civet. See- Nibble around it, stopping ing, hearing, or smelling lightly slap it to suck him once in a while. can inhibit orgasms. other animals having sex with the other. The sugar beads from your can be horny inspiration. mouth will tingle on his tip. —December 2011 —November 2010 —October 1994 —June 2003 More (legitimately good) ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 71 sex tips right this way....

astrology Aries Taurus Although you’re a total Your job is asking a lot homebody for most of of you, but on the bright June, you’re flirting it up in side, more work usually the DMs. If you’re looking means more money. Just for something serious, remember to put some of wait to DTR until Leo sea- that cash in savings so you son begins on July 22, don’t blow it all on treating when the fiery astro yourself (which you abso- weather promises to set lutely should do!) when your love life ablaze. you’re finally off the clock. BY JAKE REGISTER Gemini Cancer PHOTOGRAPH BY JEFFREY WESTBROOK Your birthday season is Happy birthday! You officially over, and it’s deserve one—just keep an back to regular life. eye out for shady behav- Things may feel a little ior in your squad. Wait out monotonous, but you’ll any drama, because Venus have more money pouring entering your sign in July in this July, and once Leo helps you attract better season rolls around, it’s friends, new lovers, and time to embrace your some extra cash too. inner party animal. Leo Virgo Libra Scorpio As per usual, Cancer The summer begins with All eyes are on you, espe- If you’re looking to book a season is making you feel your thriving social life! cially at work. Try not to summer vacation—or even pretty meh, but you’re flip- Enjoy all the happy hours, slack off, because the just a fun day trip—Cancer ping the script when Leo because when Leo season potential for a raise is sky- season is the best time to season begins. The Sun starts, you’re facing a few high this Cancer season. travel. Enjoy yourself now, and Mercury in your sign blasts from the past—like Then, come Leo season, because Leo season is make you even more extro- an ex or a former friend— your schedule frees up and adding a lot of pressure to verted and confident in and you’re being asked to you have time to go to all your work life. The good late July, and when Venus finally find closure. the BBQs and pool parties. news is that if you do well, flies into your sign in August, you might get a promotion! you’re a babe magnet. Sagittarius Capricorn Aquarius Pisces PROP STYLIST: ELIZABETH OSBORNE. Everyone is emotional dur- Cancer season is basically Sorry for this real talk, but: Whether you’re hanging with ing Cancer season, but cuffing season for your Your to-do list is about your crew, getting closer to you’re extra emo. You just sign. Think: the romance of a million miles long, and your boo, or meeting new can’t stick to your usual “live Bridgerton season 2 with you’re going to have to put potential paramours, you fast” lifestyle right now, the sex of Bridgerton sea- the rest of your life on the can bet on getting tons of Sag. It’s time to (temporar- son 1. As summer goes on, back burner until you’ve action this Cancer season... ily) settle down and work you’ll probably feel ready crossed most of it out. It’s to the point that you risk through your feels. Don’t to level up whatever kind of easy to get burned out wearing yourself out. Luckily, worry, you’ll be back to your relationship you’re in. Do it! right now, so make sure Leo season is all about reor- normal self when Leo sea- you’re setting aside at least ganizing your life and get- son begins. some time for self-care. ting back on track. 72 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

...And What Happens Day 5 if You Follow Yours to the Freaking T I have plans to see the movie Umma, and Co-Star’s instructions to “read Spoiler: It’s basically a part-time job. reviews” make perfect sense (Sandra Oh = genius, btw). It’s the spring equi- BY ERIKA W. SMITH nox, so I listen to Chani’s guided medi- tation before bed. I can’t remember the To be honest, though, it’s also kind Day 3 last time I felt so relaxed as I fell asleep. of my job job. But while you might think that as Cosmo’s senior astrol- It’s hot out, so Co-Star’s “soup, loung- Day 6 ogy editor, I already live by my horo- ing, loose-leaf tea” is unappealing, scope—and I do try—look, I’m a busy but I force myself to recline and take a My day job covers a ’scope again person with a lengthy Netflix queue, few sips (ew). I prefer Chani’s “power when Co-Star tells me “check sources, so...yeah. In any case, I’m here now up,” which I translate as “have a sec- immediacy,” but I run out of time for and I challenged myself to one week ond iced coffee.” Works for me. “construction paper.” Almost a week of strictly abiding by the universe. in, I can confirm with authority that this And lest you think I’m biased, I used Day 4 whole thing is proof the stars are here the popular and wildly different apps to guide, not micromanage, us. Chani Co-Star and Chani for my guidance. Co-Star’s “red lights, crushes, texting hints at “promising news.” (Perhaps back” has me struggling because I the end of this experiment??) Day 1 don’t drive. I decide that standing under a “don’t walk” street signal is Day 7 Chani says, “Make your edits,” and close enough. I don’t really have a because I’m an editor, done. Co-Star crush either, but combined with the I get “manifestos, packing lists, simple tells me to do “sonnets, candelabras, driving mood, I get the urge to listen machines” (Co-Star) and “Impulsive fondue.” I do some googling and cre- to Olivia Rodrigo. I text back my much?!” (Chani). I have a vacation ate an ugly-looking, decent-tasting friends, but then, I always do. Chani planned, so I jot down what to take. beer cheese fondue, then read a says, “Love your And here’s an impulsive manifesto: Shakespeare sonnet. It turns out can- weird.” I think I’m From now on, I’m going back to using delabras are expensive, so I give my already there? my horoscope as a daily vibe check, Sims one instead. They don’t love it. not a literal to-do list. Day 2 It’s “goodbyes, secondhand stores, deep-sea diving” from Co-Star. The latter is just not going to happen, so I go to a thrift store and meet an ador- able cat who lets me pet her goodbye. It’s a Full Moon, and I follow Chani’s advice to make a DIY altar. I put it on top of my dresser, complete with candles, crystals, and fresh pars- ley. It looks very pretty, and I feel very accomplished. Time to add a ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 73 “my horoscope told me to” section to your budget. Which astro app is best for you? The answer, right here.

PROMOTION New Must-Haves Just Dropped Put these in your shopping cart and thank us later. gFAasNemTAxeSYs THE COSMO TAROT: STEAMY ROLE-PL AYING CHALLENGES FOR NEXT-LEVEL The Ultimate Deck and Guidebook BEDROOM FUN What’s in the cards for you? Only the most FROM THE EDITORS OF amazing predictions about your life, NBD. cosmopolitan.com/cosmotarot FANTASY SEX GAMES Turn your wildest fantasies into reality by introducing seductive role play into your bedroom...and beyond. cosmopolitan.com/ fantasysexgames CARAMEL COSMOLIVING OUTDOOR POPCORN SPRAY COLLECTION Satisfying your sweet tooth Embrace the great outdoors (AKA your backyard) has never been more low and your next happy hour in style with the maintenance than with this CosmoLiving outdoor collection. spray that turns any bag of cosmopolitan.com/cosmoliving popcorn into the answer to all your caramel cravings. delish.com/caramel GOING OUT TOP GROOVY BB PHONE CASE In loving memory of all the tops we spilled beer on—they’re in Bring back the a better place now, and so are ‘70s and mirror we (TG). cosmopolitan.com/ selfies with this goingouttop retro-inspired phone case that’ll look almost as cute as you do in your next post. cosmopolitan.com/ groovyphonecase

FA ME It’s the thing we all lust after, the secret endgame of The Great the speed at which they rise and fall and try new things is break- GETTY IMAGES. American Dream: popularity on a massive scale. In 2022, the neck. The people and ideas on the following pages (the hopeful concept is more complex and perplexing than ever—a time when hunger of the rising stars on page 76, the high-wire balancing act fame is both consequential and frivolous, both fleeting and eter- of success on page 88, the fan-demanded favorites on page 106, nal, both exciting and dangerous—but it’s not slowing anyone and the cautionary predictions on page 100) are a snapshot of down. With the proliferation of platforms, there are more famous fame in this unique, specific moment, but they’ll change as soon people on this planet right now than in all of human history, and as you put the issue down. Try to keep up. ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 75

DRESSING UP WITH

On Lexi: Nana Jacqueline set and belt. Aquazzura sandals. On Jabari: Willy Chavarria blazer, T-shirt, and pants. Sunni Sunni mules. Uniform Object necklace. David Yurman bracelets and ring. On Gavin: Tia Adeola top and pants. Manolo Blahnik shoes. David Yurman neck- lace. Marrow Fine ring. HOLLYWOOD’S HOTTEST These eight rising stars—wearing our favorite rising designers—are the new It List. PHOTOGRAPHS BY ALEX HARPER FASHION BY CASSIE ANDERSON WORDS BY EMMA BATY ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 77

GAVIN CASALEGNO If laying eyes on Noah Centineo in To All the Boys was a life- changing event for you, wait until you see Gavin in The Summer I Turned Pretty, out now on Amazon Prime Video (conve- niently also based on books by Jenny Han, so you know it’ll be good). The 22-year- old’s performance is so achingly bitter- sweet that it will cement his heartthrob status. (Not that he’s only heartthrob material: He also shared scenes with Russell Crowe in Darren Aronofsky’s biblical drama Noah, which you’re probably still having night- mares about.) Meanwhile, Gavin is just happy to be here: “Whether it’s a romance or a show based on a book, it’s all magical to me. I’m honored to be a part of the journey.” Taakk shirt. 78 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

LEXI UNDERWOOD She’s only 18, but Lexi’s filmography has prestige written all over it. She was cast alongside Kerry Washington and Reese Witherspoon in Little Fires Everywhere before she could legally drive, she played Malia Obama in Showtime’s The First Lady with Viola Davis, and she’s joining the Freeform thriller Cruel Summer for season 2. And yes, she says, when you work with the smartest women in the business, you pick up lessons along the way: “They’ve taught me it is 100 percent okay to be me and to be my character’s biggest advocate.” She’s doing just that at the helm of her own company, Ultimate Dreamer Productions. Santa Brands dress. Skims bralette and thong. Jessica Rich san- dals. Maria Tash ring.

JABARI BANKS It takes a certain ballsiness to step into a role that was iconically someone else’s—and not only make it your own but expand it too. That’s what this 23-year-old is doing (to lots of critical acclaim) in Bel-Air, the Peacock reboot of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And sure, getting a part like this is basically a dream and the series has already been renewed for a second season, but Jabari is thinking even farther ahead: “In 10 years, I hope to have paved a path and inspired younger artists to do the same for those after them. That’s what it’s all about, to spark the next.” Greg Lauren top, vest, jacket, and pants. Giuseppe Zanotti sneakers. David Yurman necklace. 80 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

Galvan x Martha Hunt Cap- sule bralette. ManLuu stud ear jackets. David Yurman cuff bracelet. My Enemy ring (index). Mam ring (ring). Karen’s own huggie earrings. KAREN FUKUHARA The Boys on Amazon Prime Video made superhero shows cool again (sorry, Marvel), thanks in part to this 30-year-old star. She’s responsible for playing Kimiko, the show’s only female vigilante, in all her ass-kicking glory. One of her favorite parts of the role? Flexing her musical- theater chops in season 3, which is now streaming. “I had given up on my childhood dream of being in a musical—there aren’t many opportunities for leading roles as an Asian American actor. But now, here I am.” Speaking of bucket lists: Karen’s already done a blockbuster (her first movie was Suicide Squad), and now she’s hanging with Brad Pitt in your new favorite movie Bullet Train.

OLIVIA LIANG Markarian dress. Uniform Object As the star of The CW’s Kung Fu, a earrings. Marrow gender-swapped Fine ring. Olivia’s version of the 1970s classic, Olivia leads own necklace. the first-ever U.S. network drama with a predominantly Asian cast. (She plays San Francisco crime fighter Nicky Shen, and fans will be happy to know she starts filming the highly anticipated third season in July.) And this is after her role on Legacies, in which she played a...witch. We call that range! The 29-year-old is feeling pretty thankful right now, even for the (very relatable) small stuff, like “when I can afford to park in a structure instead of circling the streets of Los Angeles for an hour to find free parking. It’s an opportunity for gratitude I choose to recognize.”

On Coral (meet her on the next page!): Lucille Reynolds leotard and bodysuit. Roger Vivier sandals. Stylist’s own hosiery. On Olivia: Cecilie Bahnsen top and skirt. Gianvito Rossi mules. Justine Clenquet ring. Olivia’s own bracelet. ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 83

Et Ochs dress. Roger Vivier sandals. Isabel Marant earrings. Yun Yun Sun ring. CORAL PEÑA How can someone step up their game when one of their first films was a Steven Spielberg movie (The Post)? By getting onto a major Apple TV+ show, that’s how. This 29-year- old stars in ForAll Mankind, a sci-fi epic that imagines what life would be like if the Soviet Union had gotten to the moon before the U.S. had. Coral gets to play her character, Aleida Rosales, through decade-long time jumps. It’s good practice for her ultimate goal, which is to be a classic character actor. “I hope to do something different with every part I play,” she says. “I want to be malleable and adventurous enough that I never repeat myself.” 84 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

FIN ARGUS One of those people Their next album’s who is annoyingly first single, “Exposure,” good at both acting comes out in June. and singing, 23-year- “Whether it’s music old Fin is here to or acting, I’m always take over the whole trying to find new entertainment ways to showcase industry. They’re raw truth through art,” stepping into one Fin says. “I’m making of the most important some of the best music franchises in the of my life right now.” LGBTQ+ community They’re not lying. It with the reboot is—in a word— of Queer as Folk on perfection. Peacock (see page 10 for a review). And, ahem, important intel: Martin Asbjørn blazer, dress, and pants. Hue socks. Converse sneakers. Mondo Mondo earrings. Reframed Jewellery necklace. Marrow Fine ring. Fin’s own bracelet.

On Samantha: Danarys top and skirt. Samantha’s own ring. On Karen: Annakiki gown. Dior earrings. Dévé ring. On Fin: Mis- creants bodysuit. Isabel Marant earrings. Swarovski ring.

HAIR: KACHAY DORSEY/CLOUTIER REMIX. MAKEUP: CARLENE K AT CROSBY CARTER MANAGEMENT. MANICURE: MERRICK FISHER AT OPUS BEAUTY. FASHION ASSISTANT: CHARLOTTE SAMANTHA HADLOW. PRODUCTION: CRAWFORD & CO PRODUCTIONS. HAIR AND MAKEUP BOOKINGS: NOIR CASTING. FOR SHOPPING INFORMATION, GO TO COSMOPOLITAN.COM. HANRATTY The 26-year-old’s IMDb page is about as long as a CVS receipt—she’s been acting for more than half her life. (See roles in Shameless, Pushing Daisies, and Salem.) But you probably know her best from Yellowjackets, the Lord of the Flies– esque Showtime series that dominated the internet early this year. She plays the infinitely meme-able younger version of the slightly unhinged Misty, which Samantha views as a fun challenge: “I’m an empathetic and investigative actor. I like to figure out why my character is doing what they’re doing and not judge them for it.” She plans to keep not judging Misty into Yellowjackets season 2, which (hopefully) begins filming later this summer. Batsheva top and pants. Colette earrings. ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 87

THE HIGH A R T OF

INTERVIEW BY ALEXANDRA WHITTAKER PHOTOGRAPHS BY JOSEFINA SANTOS FASHION BY CASSIE ANDERSON THE JOURNEY FROM CHILD STAR TO BONA FIDE LEGEND IS A NOTORIOUSLY TRICKY ONE. SO HOW DOES A PERSON TAKE IT ALL IN—THE OBSESSIVE SCRUTINY, THE INTENSE PRESSURE, THE HEADY PRAISE—AND COME OUT OKAY ON THE OTHER END? THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT MADDIE ZIEGLER IS FIGURING OUT. Act N°1 dress. Tiffany & Co. Schlumberger ear clips. XIV Karats bracelet (worn throughout). ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 89

FIRST CAME THE R E A L I T Y S H O W. It was 2011, and more than 2 million people tuned in each week to watch 8-year-old Maddie Ziegler and her friends compete on the excruciating yet addictive series Dance Moms. The demanding work—filming meant Maddie missed 50 days of school one year; she’d often stay up past midnight learning new dance solos—jump-started her career. Suddenly, she was on the radar of people like pop star Sia, who then cast Maddie as the protagonist in her music videos, most famously “Chandelier.” And that only gets us to 2014. In the time since, Maddie, now 19, has launched an acting career (see: her recent roles in West Side Story and HBO Max’s The Fallout); plenty of brand deals, ranging from a Fabletics line to a Kate Spade fragrance; and a refreshingly candid podcast, Take 20, with her younger sister Kenzie. She has amassed 4.7 million TikTok followers—many of whom seem genuinely amazed that Maddie has aged beyond childhood—and is just about to start filming a top secret project she can say absolutely nothing about. It is, and always has been, a lot. There’ve been glitzy highs and miserable lows, a journey of learnings and what Maddie calls “unlearnings” along the way from Pittsburgh elementary schooler to fashion dar- ling walking the Oscars red carpet. But as we Zoom in late spring, there’s little evidence of her legendary hustle; Maddie appears calm, collected. And truly grown up. I’d love to start with a simple question that’s maybe not so would say, “I’m the best. I know I’m going to win.” But that’s simple at all: Do you like being famous? because the producer was telling me to say that. I don’t think I still have a hard time considering myself famous. I know fame I’m better than everyone else. I was just doing whatever they is a very wide spectrum, but still, I just don’t think I’m famous. I told me to do because I thought that’s what you did. They set see people like Rihanna...I always say I’m “well known.” you up for failure. What’s the difference? I had more stress at that age than I did once I left. I have I have a fear of people thinking I think I’m all that, and that’s what dissociated so much from that time. I’ll see fans post scenes I relate being famous to, even though I know that’s not neces- from Dance Moms and I’m like, I literally don’t even remember sarily the case. It’s just easier for me to say “well known” or “in that happening. It’s weird because there were really amazing the public eye” because to me, that just seems less intimidating. times, but there were also a lot of things that were really, really not great for us kids. When did you realize you were “well known”? Can you share an example? I was 8 and we were in an ice cream store, me and the girls1 The pressure of being known as, “Oh, she’s the girl that always from Dance Moms, and people were calling our names. We wins,” then to not win or to have another girl beat me was the were weirded out, like, “How do they know our names?” Then I end of the world. Because that’s what I was taught: to not win noticed it gradually—everywhere we went, at any dance com- or to have another girl beat me was the end of the world. My petition—swarms of people. It didn’t make me excited. In a way, dance teacher2 taught that if you don’t get the trophy, if you I was kind of embarrassed. don’t get the crown, you are less than, which is the worst way to train a kid. It carries into other life lessons. We also weren’t How did you cope with that kind of attention, especially at allowed to watch our competitors or be friends with them. I’ve that age? Because you were little! had to unlearn a lot of those things. I felt like, I hope the teachers are taking me seriously, because all these girls are asking me for photos and I’m here to work. It Have you watched the series as an adult? was really hard for me to set the two worlds apart because I Never. absolutely adored when people would come up to me and say they started dancing because of me. The fact that they even Wow. cared about me was so cool, but at the same time, I’m like, “Oh, I did watch a little bit of an episode from the very beginning to I’m also here to try and win a scholarship.” 1. That would be Nia Sioux, Brooke and Paige Hyland, Chloe Lukasiak, and How did what aired on the show compare to what it was Maddie’s sister Kenzie Ziegler. They’re all still tight. Maddie makes a point to actually like in real life? say they hang “without the moms.” People thought I was a brat because in all my interviews, I 2. Abby Lee Miller, a coach notorious for yelling at young children, has spent her post–Dance Moms career embroiled in legal and financial woes. 90 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

Gucci top, skirt, and gloves. Harwell Godfrey ring.

Giambattista Valli top and skirt. Jenna Blake earrings.

show my boyfriend3 because I was like, “You cannot watch this, to 19-year-olds because I had to grow up so quickly. I’ve also but I’ll show you what I looked like.” And we both were like, “This always been an old soul. I’m a grandma at heart—I went to bed is sad. We need to turn this off.” at 9:30 last night. My boyfriend and I, the second we lie down to watch something on TV, I’m knocked out. He sent me a meme Did you ever want to quit Dance Moms while you were on it? the other day that says when people fall asleep immediately It is hard when you’re really loyal to your dance group. I was the with another person, it just means they feel safe. And now he’s most loyal girl there; I just wanted to dance. And I loved compet- like, “Okay, I feel I’m not going to hate on you as much.” ing until it became televised and the drama started. Don’t get me wrong—there’s drama regardless if there are cameras or I know you and Eddie were friends first. Do you remember not! But it was heightened. I started to feel like, It’s so peaceful the moment it turned romantic? outside of this world. I can’t be in this. My family and I really tried Literally the moment. We were sitting on a couch together late to leave for the last three seasons. But when you’re in a contract, at night. We’d been best friends for a while and both broken it’s really hard. Eventually, I finally got out. up with other people; a little bit of time had passed. We were just talking and he was like, “Yeah, me and you just have so Your teacher didn’t take the news well.4 Was that awkward? much love for each other, it gets confusing.” I was like, “Yeah, it She was distraught. For the longest time, we felt so guilty. She totally does.” And then we both just looked at each other and trained me, she helped me, but also, I knew I would be okay with- I was like, “Oh.” I remember covering my face with a pillow for out her and I was sick of being in a toxic environment. I was like, 20 minutes. I couldn’t look at him. I was like, “This is so embar- “This is not for me. I can’t do this.” I haven’t spoken to her since.5 rassing because we literally just admitted that we love each other!” But we’re kids. Me and Eddie are still kids. We’re figuring It seems like one thing that gave you an exit was your work it out and we’re just letting it happen. with Sia. What did you learn from transitioning into music? Making mistakes. When I was learning “Chandelier,” it was This is the highest of compliments, I promise, but it seems my first time working with a new choreographer and I was so like you two are goofy together in the best way. critical. I was taught you have to be pretty, you have to be put- We definitely are. Literally, my sister always is like, “You guys together. No one can ever see you without a perfectly pointed have this language that no one else has and you guys are so foot or a straight leg. And what I learned was that your flaws weird and say the weirdest things,” but it just makes sense to us. are also beautiful. What do you do together when you’re not working? I think that was the best time ever in my life. I felt like Hannah He is so good at getting me out of scary moments where I’m Montana, like I was living in two worlds. When I put the wig on, I just in a rut or I feel anxious or I’d had a little panic attack. We was this completely other girl. It really helped me love acting. It’s wrestle all the time, not in an aggressive way. But we love UFC, hard for me to be proud of myself because I’m just like, “Oh, that literally love UFC so much. We’ve gone to see Conor McGregor could have been better.” But the Sia videos? I’m proud of them. fight many times in person. It’s so out of my element—it’s so violent. I don’t know why I like it. Or we’ll play soccer. I can’t That feels like growth. even play, but it’s just fun to do things that have no pressure or Totally. Literally, my 8-year-old self would be like, “Round of expectation attached to them. applause, Maddie!” How else has your perspective shifted as you’ve gotten On an episode of your podcast,6 Kenzie mentioned she wasn’t older? sure if you’d be in a relationship because, even as a kid, you I will always be a perfectionist, but not in the way where in were so work-focused. Dance Moms you would see me crying and then I just suck it up When I was younger, I never thought about wanting a boyfriend. and get right back to it. I’m going to therapy, talking to people, I was like, I’m a working girl; I don’t have time for this. I was never doing all the things. I’ve learned I’m not going to be in trouble boy crazy either. Obviously, I loved Zac Efron when I was 8 years if I’m feeling bad or if I have an injury. That’s the biggest dif- old and Justin Bieber when I was 8 years old, but I never thought ference. It’s amazing that I’m able to feel my feelings and not about real-life boys.7 just push them down. I’m also just really clean. That’s where my perfectionism has transferred. What did you learn about relationships growing up? My parents just weren’t meant to be together and that’s fine. Like, into your house? When I was younger and saw friends’ parents being nice to I just got a new rug in my living room, and every time people each other, I was like, This is so weird. Your parents don’t yell at come over, I’m like, “I’m sorry, but you need to take your shoes off.” No one cares, but still, I hate to be that person. My boyfriend 3. Maddie and 20-year-old Australian singer Eddie Benjamin have been dating jokes, “I feel like you like when I make a mess because you like since 2019. Their nicknames for each other are “too random and embarrass- to clean it. You get excited to pull out the vacuum.” And I do. ing” for Maddie to say out loud, so fill in the blank with what you will. 4. An understatement, given that Miller locked herself in a room and wept when Have there been other moments lately when you’ve thought, Maddie’s mom, Melissa, delivered the news in an episode titled “Melissa’s I’m really an adult? Announcement.” I had to hire someone to come power-wash my balcony and 5. Maddie does not plan on talking to Miller ever again. “I feel at peace,” she I was like, This is the most adult thing ever! But I kind of have says. “Definitely.” felt like an adult my whole life, which is weird. Even Tonya, my 6. Maddie and Kenzie drop new 20-minute episodes each week. Topics range best friend, she’s in her 30s and I relate to her more than I do from “Self-Care Sessions” and “The Dating Game” to “Handling Divorce.” 7. For what it’s worth, Zac Efron and Justin Bieber are, in fact, real-life boys. And Maddie has met them both. ISSUE 4 Cosmopolitan 93

Miu Miu top, briefs, and skirt. Retrouvaí ring (left). De Beers Jewellers ring (right). each other? I didn’t understand. Now, seeing my mom with my stepdad, he completes her in an amazing way. It’s cool to see a healthy relationship. And Mom is literally the best mom. I am a caretaker too, intensely. That is my role in life. This sounds deep, but when my parents divorced when I was 6, I stepped in as the other parent for Kenzie. I loved taking care of her, and I just apply that to all my friendships. I want to ask about another type of relationship: the one you have with your social media fans. How do you decide what to post? I’ve actually had a hard time with Instagram recently, where it kind of feels like a chore to me. It’s such a highlight reel already; I don’t want to pretend like this photo was casually taken when I purposely got ready for it and posed for hours. I really admire people who are more honest. Like, I’ve been dealing with back acne for two years on and off, and I’m so insecure about it at every photo shoot. Eventually, I was just like, Okay, I’m going to put it on my Story. I said, “This is what I’ve been dealing with. Is anyone else going through this, and do you have any recommendations?” I had so many people reach out. I kind of want to use Instagram now as a more conversational thing, where we can talk about things that maybe aren’t always so great. It’s refreshing to see more celebrities being candid and also setting boundaries. I immediately think of Hailey Bieber, who limited her comments and speaks up when she’s not having it. I really, really respect Hailey for the video she made telling people to leave her alone. She is such a nice person and so intelligent and so sweet and beautiful. Sometimes when you respond to things, it adds to the fire, so it’s scary doing that. That’s so true. Do you know Hailey personally? Yeah, because my boyfriend is opening for Justin right now on tour. They’ve been so nice to Eddie and me. We look up to them as a couple—they’re so amazing and so in love. It’s really refreshing to see that they have that love but that things can be up and down. It’s cool that they talk about it publicly. It’s not relatable to never have a problem. It’s great to have role models, especially as a celebrity who started as a kid, which can come with its own weirdness. I literally hit puberty in front of everyone on TV, and that’s a super-weird thing. I started developing boobs and I got my period and my body started changing, and people were like, “Oh, she’s gaining weight. She’s getting fat.” And I’m like, Whoa! I’m literally becoming more of a woman! People have said that I am pregnant before.8 And it’s like, You guys. I’m maturing and you are all probably doing the same thing. They hold you to this version, this idea that they’ve built up in their head of who they think I am. And then anything outside of that idea is really hard for them to comprehend. Sometimes I’ll have moms come up to me and they’re like, “We still think you’re 8 years old.” 8. A YouTube video called “Did Maddie Ziegler Give Birth to a Baby Boy” currently has more than 10 million views. And before you ask, no.

Bach Mai gown. Adidas sneakers. Maria Tash earrings.

Michael Kors Collection dress and belt. Stuart Weitzman sandals. Maria Tash earrings. De Beers Jewellers ring. 96 Cosmopolitan I S S U E 4

Greta Constantine gown. Evangelie Smyrniotaki x Sergio Rossi sandals. De Beers Jewellers ring.

Richard Quinn hood top and coat.