Fr. Amatus Kallarackal

["79 In the second part of the letter, he stresses the importance of praying together with the children in the family everyday which will inculcate the habit of prayer among children. He insists that parents should encourage children to attend Holy Mass on all possible occasions. Developing the habit of reading the Bible and personal prayer are also stressed as the sign of a noble Christian living) Being a man of spiritual simplicity, Fr. Amatus was never touched by the greed for power nor the desire to be a prominent member of the community. He never demanded for any position nor any exclusive privileges in the community unlike many of today\u2019s religious who are often fascinated by power and positions. Fr. Amatus was always happy to be in a state of being uncounted for. He prayed so ardently not as a part of the routine of his religious commitment but it was the breath of his spiritual life. He enjoyed an exclusive relationship with his master Jesus Christ. So, he never felt the need for developing an exclusive relationship with the world of mortality. He did not have any special human friend, but his friendship with everybody was very special. He never excluded anybody from the realm of his friendship but did not like to engage in exclusive talks behind the closed doors to maintain special friendships. In today\u2019s community situations, such a life of steadfastness is a big challenge and only saints are able to resist such temptations. Fr. Amatus admirably","80 developed such a holy mind set and practiced a single- minded devotion to the crucified Lord which enabled him to be away from the corrupt and corrupting power games, that are commonplace experiences in today\u2019s community life situations. Fr. Amatus was a quiet man. He did not speak too much. Fr. Amatus well realized and practiced the proverbial saying \u201ctoo much talk leads to sin\u201d (Proverbs 10:19). This was quite true in his relationship with his community members as well as his family members. This is quite evident from the testimony of his elder brother\u2019s son Alexander Kallarackal. (cf. In Loving Memory of Fr. Amatus CMI, Department of Education and Communication, Mysuru: 2013, pp. 25-26) He did not keep any attachment to his family members and relatives. He loved them, prayed for them, and reminded them of their responsibilities and lived the word of God in its fuller meaning as St. Mathew puts it \u201cAnd everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or field for my sake will receive hundred times as much and will receive eternal life.\u201d (Mt.10:29) While most of our everyday conversations are centered on us and others about the future possibility of making our community richer, stronger, and modern by our own unmatchable contributions and managerial skills, Fr.","81 Amatus spent most of his private time in holy silence. He never engaged in any talk about himself or about other\u2019s shortcomings. He never was an advertiser of his holiness rather was so humble before the Lord and men. In a memoir about Fr. Amatus Published from the Department of Education, Carmel Bhavan, Mysuru, Fr. Jomon Kolenchery CMI writes: Twenty-two years back, in an interview for our Novitiate manuscript magazine Chavaravani, I just asked Fr. Amatus about his most recurring experiences during the formation period of his life. To my inquisitive question, his reply was that, it was during his formation period that, he experienced the divine providence in its depth. He was so sorrowful when his formators finally concluded that he was physically unfit to be promoted for priestly studies, as the family doctor certified that, his heart was weak. But he firmly believed and depended on the divine providence and prayed with tears to the Almighty who called him to religious life. The providential care of the Heavenly Father, recognizing his inner purity and sincerity, strongly protected him in changing the mind of the formators and he was promoted for further studies.","82 Even though the human perception was that his heart was weak, he lived for the last 82 years with a strong and pure heart closer to the Sacred Heart of Jesus making him so dear to God and His people. \u201cThe companion brothers were so smart and were excelling in music, art, and oratory. Since I was poor in all of these, I gave importance to prayer and reading.\u201d These words of Fr. Amatus made me so sad. Later when I shared these words of Fr. Amatus with Rev. Fr. Thomas Vithayathil CMI, he replied that, he said so not because Fr. Amatus was behind others, rather, it was because of his humility that, he wanted to value others more than him. The depth and meaningfulness of his exhortations without any oratory power showed his personal sanctity, knowledge, and spiritual nearness to the Lord. He welcomed everybody with folded hands and preferred to stand behind everybody, but in the area of personal sanctity and spiritual vigor he was far ahead of everybody. While operating a water pump at Kandali, he was almost facing death by being caught by his cassock on the machine. But the mighty Lord, who saved His people","83 even by dividing the sea, saved him by tearing apart his cassock. God wanted him to live amidst us still longer as a sign of sanctity for all of us. While narrating this event, tears were rolling down from his eyes as a sign of his gratefulness to the Lord. All those who spoke about sanctity pointed to Fr. Amatus as the most fitting example. The knowledge and convictions he gained through his readings and meditations added fuel for his life of obedience and community living. He did not pursue any higher studies not because he was intellectually incapable of that, but he willingly detached from such desires and preferred to be a simple religious. He so eagerly encouraged other in reading good books and for that reason bought as many as books in the libraries of the religious house he lived in. Fr. Amatus spent most of his free time in the chapel. Even after everybody left the chapel after the community prayer, he used to spend some more time in the chapel engaging in personal conversation with the Lord on the knees with extended hands. He prayed for all of us and the congregation and for the whole world, of course, his extended hands of prayer are still with us and that will","84 be with us forever. His inner sanctity and humility made him a humble religious who cared for everybody with folded hands. Fr. Amatus did not create any new theological treaties or propagated any revolutionary ideas. He had his own opinions and convictions and vision of life. In all these he kept up the modesty and nobility which were signs of his inner purity and consequent tranquility and peace. He practiced a perfect and heroic detachment from all kinds of worldly achievements. His greatest achievement was his experience of the nearness of the Lord. That is why he was called by the people of Marakkadavu as the God of Marakkadavu.26 Fr. Amatus was not an acclaimed spiritual scholar or a preacher, but his highly spiritual personality with its inspiring simplicity and sincerity were uniquely inspiring for all those who lived with him. Rev. Fr. Varghese Koluthara, the former Provincial Superior of St. Paul\u2019s Province, Mysuru writes: The literal meaning of the Syriac word \u2018Besrauma\u2018\u2019 means, raised platform, the 26Jomon Kolanchery, Vishudhiyude Panineerpoovu, Pp.2- 3.","85 house at the top of a hill etc... which in spiritual terms implies a place of God- experience. St Chavara transformed the mount Mannanam into a place of intense God-experience. Fr. Amatus, by following the footsteps of St Chavara, became a man of God-Experience. The people of God at Marakkadavu Parish in Wayanad, in 1980s lovingly saluted Fr. Amatus, who was their then vicar, by calling him a nickname God of Marakkadavu (Eesho Achan), as his life itself was a 'Besrauma\u2019 experience for them. Fr. Amatus, who was so competitive in leading a life of sanctity as a Carmelite religious, transformed all the religious houses he lived in, into houses of God- experience. He was so humble and at the same time so prudent in guiding the Provincial authorities by keeping them informed about the inner visions and inspirations he received through prayer and contemplation concerning the community. He was, thus, the voice of divine guidance for the authorities at his time. He was so silent, but his silence itself was a sign of his holy life and personality. It was in 1973 at Karukutty Novitiate house that I first met him as our Syriac teacher there. He was also","86 our confessor. The very life of Fr. Amatus and Rev. Fr. Isaias taught us volumes about the nature of the life of sanctity in the congregation.27 All the brothers who were under formation with Fr. Amatus in Novitiate and pre-Novitiate are great witnesses of Fr. Amatus\u2019 saintly personality, especially of his purity of heart and spiritual simplicity. His humility in behavior and simplicity in life was the result of his evangelically purified heart. Fr. Saneesh Pathickal who spent his Novitiate and pre-Novitiate training with Fr. Amatus has the following to say in this regard: I consider the opportunity that I got to be trained under a saintly person of Fr. Amatus CMI during my pre-Novitiate period as a great blessing from God. In the year 2003 when I reached Jnanamandira, our aspirant\u2019s house, it was Fr. Amatus who welcomed us first. At first sight itself I felt something very special in Fr. Amatus, as a mature and divinely oriented person, with a fatherly care and simplicity of heart in his presence and dealings. He was our confessor in the first year of training. He was a consoling and comforting confessor. In the 27Fr. Dr. Varghese Koluthara C.M.I, Sukruthavazhiye, p.45.","87 Novitiate at Thandavapura again we were very lucky and blessed to have Fr. Amatus as our confessor. Though he was not able to take any long classes for us, he was a full- time available confessor who always welcomed us to his room with a loving smile on his face. He liked all of us without any differences. It was a blessing that a person like Fr. Amatus lived among us. Even though the concept of sanctity in religious life is undergoing drastic changes, Fr. Amatus was not at all influenced by any of the liberalist temptations and he was so sincere to his call and hence lived his religious life with complete fidelity and satisfaction. He never made any complaints in his community life. He was extremely careful not to disturb others even at times of extreme pain and agony. He was sincerely thankful to others for even a small help he received. Towards the end of his life, he was so sorrowful because of his inability to celebrate or attend the Holy Eucharist which was the center of his life and his spirituality. He found and experienced the Lord in the Holy Eucharist as the substance of his life. He embraced it so deeply and considered and valued the experience of the presence of the Lord in the Eucharist more than","88 everything in this world and that was why he used to shed tears of inner joy while celebrating the Holy Mass. Finally, Fr. Amatus always used to advice his students; \u201cNever behave unpleasantly and revengefully towards others even if they behave badly towards us.\u201d The life of Fr. Amatus is a text book for all those who would like to live a life of sanctity by following Christ closely28. In the year 1999 Fr. Amatus was transferred to Jnanamandira, Bogadi, as the spiritual director of the first- year aspirants. He continued his service as the spiritual director there up to 2005, till he was fatally ill and was unable to continue the services there. While Fr. Amatus was serving Jnanamandira, Bogadi, Fr. Emmanuel Ayankudy CMI was the Rector and Superior of the house. Fr. Amatus very much enjoyed the company of the much active and friendly presence of Fr. Emmanuel. As the Rector and superior of the house, Fr. Emmanuel found the presence of Fr. Amatus as a great blessing. A saintly person like Fr. Amatus was a big inspiration for the students there who are just initiated to religious living. Fr. Emmanuel 28 Fr. Saneesh Pathickal CMI, An Interview on Fr. Amatus, Carmel Bhavan, 23rd May 2022.","89 writes about his experience of living with a sacred soul during this period: Once a group of students came to Jnanamandira from Regional college of Mysuru. They were finishing their studies and getting ready to go back to Kerala. They requested Fr. Amatus to give them a blessing. They also wanted Fr. Amatus to write in their autograph. Fr. Amatus\u2019s wisdom to them was short and sweet, \u2018be good and do good\u2019. This was nothing but the summary of his life. In another occasion about his simplicity of heart: Kyathahalli is a village way inside on the Bogadi-Gaddige road. Mysuru diocese had 450 acres of land there. Later diocese sold the land to a catholic family from Mangalore. The couple were doctors by profession and practicing Catholics. They requested occasional celebration of Holy Mass at their farm house. I agreed and once in a month used to celebrate Holy Mass for a group of 15 workers at their residence.","90 The road to Kyathahalli was wide and quite beautiful with, greenery and above all reflected the simplicity of village life. Once Fr. Amatus expressed his desire to come with me. We travelled in a jeep. He enjoyed every bit of the journey and the people who attended the Holy Mass were excited to see him. After two days on a morning Fr. Amatus was not present for the Morning Prayer. So, I visited his room and found him shivering and was in high fever. I took him to Maria Niketan clinic. After initial medical assistance doctor was summoned. Dr. Victor reached the clinic from the city. Doctor observed that the fever had affected his brain and a CT scan was prescribed. In the CT scan it was diagnosed that there was a problem of shrinking the brain. After a couple of days in the clinic the fever subsided and Fr. Amatus was brought back to Jnanamandira. Since this incident the health of Fr. Amatus took a significant change. He lost old memories and there was a general weakness in his health. He was very grateful to me for being with him all through his difficulties and used","91 to tell others, \u2018Ente jeevan rakshicha aala\u2019 (He is the one who saved my life) In another occasion, when he was admitted in B.M.H. Hospital, Mysuru, the hospital where his health was steadily deteriorating and he was almost in unconscious stage. His lips were only reciting prayers showing the inner spiritual purity of his personality. Fr. Emmanuel writes: When Fr. Amatus was in the hospital, late Fr. Thomas Kunianthodath, the then Provincial and Fr. Thomas Ayankudy, Vicar Provincial visited him. At that time Fr. Amatus was not totally conscious. Fr. Provincial called out Fr. Amatus, \u2018Amatus Achha.\u2019 But instead of responding to the call Fr. Amatus started reciting the prayer \u2018Our Father and Hail Mary\u2019 in Syriac language. Then Fr. Ayankudy said, \u201cBecause Fr. Amatus is a holy man, even when he is unconscious, he recites prayers. It is good to think what we will be saying in a similar situation.\u201d There was wit and wisdom in what he said.29 29 From an Interview with Fr. Emmanuel Ayankudy at Carmel Bhavan, Mysuru.","92 Like any other saints Fr. Amatus also underwent obstacles and temptations on his way of spiritual progress. But he was spiritually strong enough to discern the demonic temptations that occurred, especially towards the end of his life. Fr. Joseph Edakkery, who was closely associated with Fr. Amatus for a longer period speaks about it: Everyday celebration of the Eucharist with utmost care and inner sanctity was at the centre of the spiritual life of Fr. Amatus. Regular visit to the Blessed Sacrament was another strong habit which he never compromised with. Towards the end of his life, due to ill-health sometimes he was compelled to break this practice bringing him so much inner pain and agony. Sometimes he found it extremely difficult to climb the steps to chapel. He considered it as the temptations of the devil to prevent him from going to near to the Lord. Those days were really the dark nights of the soul for him. This clearly indicates the intensity of his prayer life and the deepest relationship that he enjoyed with the Lord during his life time.30 30 Fr. Joseph Edakkery, From an unpublished note on Fr. Amatus.","93 By the year 2005 Fr. Amatus was transferred to Thandavapura Ashram for rest under the care of Fr. Joseph Edakkery, the then superior of Thandavapura Ashram. He lived in this house till his death on September 8, 2008 on the day of the Nativity of our Lady. After reaching back to Thandavapura where he started his spiritual and religious services as he joined the St. Paul\u2019s Province, Mysuru, in the year 1978 his physical health started steadily deteriorating. He was suffering from constant memory loss and digestive problems. These were the days he suffered a lot of pain due to his ailments. His inability to fulfill his spiritual exercises, as he wished, was the biggest suffering for him during this period. He, so peacefully and in a highly dignified way, accepted his illness and the related pain and agony. Even at the time of extreme pain and agony he was so careful not to disturb others and was so quiet and fully satisfied in the care given to him under the direction of Fr. Joseph Edakkery, the superior. Fr. Amatus was a man who perfectly exhibited, especially towards the end of his life, a sense of self- fulfillment and complete satisfaction about his life as a religious. He was marvelously contented with the graces that he received from the Lord and was so thankful to the Lord and to the fellow religious. There was no void or vacuum in his personality that was created by a lack of","94 external possessions or positions. He marvelously and so admirably filled himself with Christ and His grace. He showed greater sense of being possessed by God and was not a person being dissatisfied about what happened in the past. Fr. Amatus never complained about what he could not achieve in the past or was not meditating on insufficiencies of the past. Being a contented man, he was thankful to the congregation, to the Church and to God for all what he was and what he received. Nobody heard him lamenting about the past. He always lived in the presence of God fully trusting in His providence. Fr. Amatus\u2019 spiritual simplicity was translated into an exemplary life of material simplicity which made him a model and inspiration for many due to his uncompromised life of detachment from material things during his life. The hall mark of the personality of Fr Amatus was his simplicity both spiritual as well as material. One, without having any hesitation and a second thought, can confidently say that above all of the sweet qualities of Fr. Amatus, what defined his personality was his simplicity in all aspects of his life.","Chapter 8 FR. AMATUS AND HIS LIFE OF MATERIAL SIMPLICITY The experience of abundance is a state of mind. There is no specific limit for this concept. None can say that how much is the limit of abundance. This is a subjective criterion. Today, we are living in a world where abundance is appreciated as a mark and sign of development. This need for abundance is extended not to the realm of consumable goods but also found as sign of so-called psychological satisfaction too. Unfortunately, religious communities are often succumbed to this obsession of abundance and are living altogether a different life from what was envisioned by the early founders of religious life. Material development of the surroundings and highly luxurious living facilities are becoming a taken for granted everyday life style in the community situations today. The inner aspirations of the religious are always to be in association with the superior class. Developing and maintaining highly luxurious institutions which only the wealthy class can afford to is the typical mark of the time. In this mad rush for luxury and excellence, personal simplicity and transparency become matters of old style which have few takers. This developmental madness is an obsession today leading to","96 certain unhealthy compulsive behavioral disorders in the religious communities leading to some sort of identity confusions. Selection of the candidates, early process of goal settings and accompanied formative process etc. are very much influenced by this criterion. The modern religious are in an inescapable web of developmental agendas which gives them certain concepts of sanctity which are miles and miles away from what Jesus preached in the Gospels. In this context of the modern life settings Fr. Amatus\u2019 life was a typical counteractive journey towards radical religious poverty and a running away from the corrupt and corrupting world of affluences and from the so- called developmental madness. Fr. Amatus did not have any exclusive personal possessions apart from a copy of the Bible, and the constitution of the congregation. Interestingly, together with these things an additional set of old religious habit which he had with him, belonged to late Rev. Fr. Edmund CMI. All what he possessed materially, contained the inside space of a shoulder bag made up of cotton. Fr. Amatus practiced the vow of poverty in the spirit and letter of the law. He was, but, meticulous about looking after and preserving what was entrusted to his care. His dreams were all about achieving an enduring and blessed life over the complicated and passing realities around him. The transitory and the pleasurable did not make any impact","97 upon him. Since his mind was so calm and clear he had no complaints about the inadequacies of his material environment or external supplies that increased or decreased his bodily pleasures Fr. Amatus accepted all his sufferings from material insufficiencies and physical sickness and pain as better means to achieve his goal. Due to these basic attitudes of suffering and contentment, his reactions to the environments and to the people with whom he lived were very much soft and admirable to all. He was not at all obsessive with money or modern comfortable life style. He did not even drive a motor cycle or a bicycle at least. He was not at all overwhelmed by the thought of attaining positions of power and influence and never strived for that directly or indirectly. His influence among the members of the community was not due to his successful resource management skills or mind-blowing diplomacy. It was his personal sanctity derived out of his simplicity of life and spiritual earnestness that gave him the inner power to influence people which never lost its hold. He never wasted anything even a bit of food. Whatever was served before him was consumed to its full without ever complaining about its taste. He demanded only the minimum and consumed only the minimum. None of us knew what his favorite taste was. Mostly he chose to eat","98 those items of the menu which community members did not like to eat, especially the so-called tasteless vegetable preparations. He did not make complaints about the lack of facilities or insufficiency of funds in the stations he was entrusted to be cared for. He meticulously looked after and preserved all what was under his care. This he did, not only in the case of material resources, but also of the human resources. As a fully committed and completely transformed religious, his religious community was his only trusted abode while he lived here on earth. I never heard of Fr. Amatus having taken long vacations or sabbatical year. He was completely satisfied in the religious house and never enjoyed anything specially provided outside the community. He never gained or managed any exclusive friends outside the community, but within him he had his best friend, Jesus Christ. He literally translated the poverty of Jesus Christ who earned, owned, or reserved nothing for himself. Fr. Amatus did not have any personal accounts or any exclusive personal financial sources. He was more than happy to manage his needs within the community itself. As Fr. James Mekkara rightly said during his funeral ceremony, \u201cHe was the poorest among the poor in the world of affluences while was the richest in spirit and virtues. One","99 of the most fortunate holy souls who found out the treasure of all treasures, one who heard the Word of God within his heart every moment, a perfect model for all of us to live an authentic religious life .\u201d","Chapter 9 FR. AMATUS EXPERIENCED GOD\u2019S PROVIDENTIAL CARE AS A LOVING FATHER AND WAS EAGER TO REACH HIS ABODE Saints were extraordinary people having unique God-experience exhibited throughout their life and activities. Saint Chavara\u2019s unique experience of Jesus as appa, and his consequent fatherly care for others made him a different saint in the contemporary period. Fr. Amatus\u2019 experience of God\u2019s providential care as a loving Father made him to love everybody as a steadfast humble and simple servant of the religious community, he was called to live in. From the very beginning of his religious life as a candidate in the aspirant\u2019s house he experienced the loving and providential care of God as a loving Father. Whenever he met with the difficult situations threatening his moving forward in religious life as humanly impossible, he experienced God\u2019s miraculous interventions in making the impossible possible. He was a silent saint lived peacefully amid the noisy environments fully aware of his sinfulness and limitations and at the same time having deeper and","101 incomparable experience of God as a loving and caring father. His personal conviction about the richness and meaning of prayer was evident from his exhortations that he occasionally gave to the students under formation. His most favorite verse in the Bible was from Mat. 13:12 and 25:29 which speaks the same thing. Interestingly, this is the only verse uttered twice in the same gospel. The passage speaks thus: Whoever has will be given more and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them. The entire spiritual life of Fr. Amatus can be seen from the perspective of this Bible verse which he liked most and used to speak about. Biblical scholars interpret this passage variously according to their vision and understanding of the biblical theology. But one thing that is commonly agreed among the scholars is that we are gifted with great talents and wisdom and must use our prudence. We shall make use of these talents and wisdom in order to grow rich in relationship with God and fellow beings at the service of the Kingdom of God. Here the implication is not the abundance of material wealth and richness rather man\u2019s spiritual growth in relationship with God and at the service of humanity. The more we grow in wisdom, prudence, and moral uprightness, the more we will be blessed and divine grace will be showered upon us to grow closer to God in spiritual maturity. Fr. Amatus so beautifully interpreted this biblical","102 passage while giving instructions to students which reflected his own very life. He trusted in the Lord and he had incomparable confidence and faith in the divine Providence in guiding him in his spiritual journey. He kept praying so deeply trusting in His Providence and completely abandoning him into His hands in all situations of trouble and tribulations. He believed that he was marvelously protected and cared for by the Lord. The more he prayed the more he grew in union with the Lord which helped him to forget himself, and all the worldly pressures and to be united with the Lord. Day and night the Lord was leading His great son in newer and greater experiences of inner tranquility and peace by showering his abundant graces upon him. His devotee, at the same time found the unmatchable pleasure in spending longer and longer times in front of the Holy Eucharist, completely lost in that radiating presence. If you pray more, you will be given the grace to grow richer and deeper in prayer. This was not just an exhortation but it was his personal experience that he was sharing with us. He received the grace of the Lord day by day in order to grow in prayer and to be united with the Lord forgetting everything else. In the life of Fr. Amatus this union with the Lord in prayer was very much evident as he was experiencing incomparable inner peace and divinely oriented loving companionship with his fellow religious. He trusted the","103 Lord in all what he did and he asked always the direction from the Lord through the superiors. So, it was very much easy for him to accept even the seemingly difficult situations as a religious. When he was asked to move to Mysuru mission by his superiors of Kalamassery Province, it was a very difficult decision for him to accept considering his ill-health and inability to communicate effectively to others etc. But trusting in the Lord and having faith in His unfailing providence and in deep prayer relationship with Him, he accepted the decision of the superiors unconditionally and moved to Mysuru. It was his deeper prayer life which gave him grace upon grace to overcome the situations of difficulties, troubles, and pain, both physical and circumstantial. As he moved towards the last days of his life, he was a man who was completely transformed by a deeper prayer life and union with the Lord and complete inner tranquilly which was never disturbed by anything that happened externally. At the end he was a man who was completely self-fulfilled and was perfectly oriented to go back to his heavenly abode. That is why he was able to meet his death so peacefully and with the complete tranquilly and admirable dignity. This deep experience of the nearness of the loving father in heaven gave him a sense of contentment in turning back to the manifold external temptations of achieving name and fame. His choice was always to be a simple soul","104 before his Heavenly Father fulfilling the prophetic words, \u201cFor this is what the high and the exalted one says-he who lives forever, whose name is Holy: \u201cI live in a high and holy place but also with the one who is contrite and lowly in spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly and to revive the heart of the contrite\u201d (Isa. 57:15). We do not find any extremes in the life of this saintly religious. He lived his life of commitment within the prescribed rules of the religious life without having excessive ups and downs. Being a teacher of Syriac for two decades Fr. Amatus had mastery in Syriac language. But we never heard him using any Syriac language phrases or words in his sermons to exhibit his mastery or knowledge. He tried to convey his heart\u2019s message which he lived and experienced in his very person in simple language. We never witnessed Fr. Amatus engaged in any verbal exhibition of arguments to establish his points in community meetings or conferences or even in casual conversations. He was quite happy to listen to others rather than making them listening to his views. He gave utmost respect and maximum space to his fellow brethren rather than dominating through ideas and actions. He was fully contented to listen and obey. Our way of being and affectionate attitudes can leave more lasting impressions in the minds of others","105 because, impressions are stronger than ideas and actions without love. In the person of Fr. Amatus there was a finest and thus a holy soul lived on earth and in our community, who was loved so much by our Heavenly Father and His only son Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. His presence gave us the experience of a feather touch of the divine love in our midst. God visited us through Fr. Amatus and we have the happy memories of those great days of the blessings of our community by the Almighty.","Chapter 10 TOWARD THE FINAL DAYS OF HIS LIFE The final years of the life of Fr. Amatus were glorious. It was during these last years that the magnificence of his humble soul was better revealed to the community. Fr. Amatus never considered that it was his right or privilege to be looked after during his sickness and old age. His reactions to the people who were at his bed side were exceptionally gentle and admirable. He appreciated the generosity, good will and loving care they rendered to him so much. He was very much careful not to give any difficulties and tensions to the people who cared him during these days. Rev Fr. Kuriachan Marangolil CMI, who was the superior of Thandavapura Ashram where Fr. Amatus spent his last days, a witness of his last moments, speaks about Fr. Amatus: During the final six years of his life Fr. Amatus was a member of the Thandavapura Ashram, where I was a member for the first three years and was the superior of the community for the last three years. I consider it as great blessing that I got at that time. Fr. Amatus was always a happy, smiling, and contented man. Being completely","107 selfless-man, he never uttered a negative word about others. He always encouraged his fellow religious and was very keen about their wellbeing. It was a blessing that I got a chance to look after him towards the end of his life. In the beginning I was bit fearful about my inability to look after such a holy man. But his holiness made it a simple and consoling task. He was so polite and friendly to all those who visited him. He received them with a lot of love and simple heart. He was so simple in his life, especially, in his dress, travel and of the things he used personally. He used to say that he was so happy in his life and was not in need of anything. He did not even accept any special treatment either in terms of things, food, dress or even in case of medical treatment. During his last days of ailments, I brought a nurse Mr. Thomas from Palakkad. Giving surprise to the nurse he behaved in such a way that as if he is the nurse and the nurse is the patient. He was so concerned about the wellbeing of the fellow brothers and of the house.","108 Though he was sick, he was active in spirit in all the matters of the house and of the people.31 His closeness to the Lord was very much deeper as he prayed so intensely and fulfilled the spiritual duties despite all his ill health. During these days Fr. Amatus did not demand any expensive treatment for his illness and prayed to the superiors to allow him to have a peaceful departure to the Lord at the earliest. He did not consider extending life on earth as much rewarding as reaching his heavenly abode. A holy soul internally desires to be liberated from the body to enjoy the eternal bliss. This intense desire to return to the heavenly Father shows his nearness to the Lord and it is the sign of his greater sanctity. The tranquility and peace that he experienced towards the end of his life clearly proves that he was a saintly soul who was loved by the Lord so much. The physical health of Fr. Amatus was steadily deteriorating by the first half of the year 2008. As he realized that he was fast approaching his final days he expressed his desire to receive the final sacraments to the then superior Rev. Fr. Kuriachan Marangolil CMI. Immediately the then Provincial, Rev. Dr. Varghese Koluthara was informed about his desire. Since Fr. 31 From an Interview with Rev. Fr. Kuriachan Marangolil.","109 Provincial was in abroad, Rev.Fr. Joseph Edakkery, the Vicar Provincial with his provincial house community together with Mr. Bibin Alex, the grandnephew of Fr. Amatus, on 30th July 2008, reached Thandavapura and administered the final sacrament to Fr. Amatus. After receiving the sacrament Fr. Amatus was filled with inner spiritual joy and his face became unusually radiant. He thanked Fr. Provincial and the whole congregation for the spiritual and physical nourishment. He so movingly thanked all those who looked after him and loved him all through his life. It was so inspiring and a moving scene of a saintly person so admirably approaching his last days of life on earth, and preparing to move to his heavenly Fathers abode.","Chapter 11 THE LAST RITES The immaculate soul of Fr. Amatus left for the eternal bliss on 8th September 2008, at 08.00 pm., on the day of the Nativity of Our Lady. We all can firmly be assured in our heart that we have a heavenly soul, an intercessor in heaven for us. What we await for is the canonisation of this saintly priest, a great son of the Carmelite community. Fr. Kuriachan Marangolil speaks about his last moments: He died on 2008, September 8th evening, on the day of the Nativity of our Lord. He was not dangerously sick apart from some stomach related issues. He was fully bedridden for only one week before his death. Even on the day of his death he was quite normal and somewhat healthy. On the day of his death at 7. 00 p.m. I visited him in his room. I informed about the evening Holy Mass and the rosary as it was the day of the Nativity of our Lady. I told him to just listen to the Holy Mass on the bed itself and he agreed. I went to the chapel and we started the rosary.","111 Towards the end of the rosary before the litany, I thought of visiting him to inform about the beginning of the Holy Mass. As reached the room I found some changes in his situation as if he was about to breathe his last. I leaned towards him watched him closely. It was quite true. He was breathing his last. Suddenly I called entire community to the room and we started the prayer for the dying. By the end of the prayer, I showed him the cross and he kissed the cross and his holy soul left for its heavenly abode to join the Lord, his solace and wealth. It was a surprising fact that he died exactly at 8.00 in the evening and exactly at 8.00 p.m. the clock in his room stopped functioning as if the time stood still paying homage to a holy soul departing to its homeland. Suddenly we informed the Provincial house about his departure. The then Provincial Fr. Dr. Varghese koluthara was on a foreign trip. The vicar Provincial Fr. Joseph Edakkery was on a journey back from Kerala. The Financial councilor Rev Fr. George Kalambukattu who was in the Provincial house reached the spot","112 immediately and we started the preparations for his last rites. During his last days, the Holy Family sisters, and St. Charles\u2019s sisters from Nanjangoud were very helpful in looking after Fr. Amatus. I thankfully remember them here. I am quite sure that I got abundance of blessings as I was with Fr. Amatus, especially during his last days of life on this earth. I am so thankful to God Almighty for giving me such an opportunity.32 The death of Fr. Amatus made the members of the St. Paul\u2019s Province, Mysuru sad and all the fathers and brothers gathered at Thandavapura on the following day to pay homage to a saintly man who lived among them silently radiating the fragrance of holiness and representing the face of Christ with angelic innocence and simplicity. He was laid to rest on Wednesday, 10th September at the community cemetery of St. Paul\u2019s Province, Mysuru, at St. Paul\u2019s Carmel, Thandavapura. His Excellency Mar Joseph Porunnedam, Bishop of Mananthavady celebrated the Funeral Mass and led 32 Fr. Kuriachan Marangolil CMI, From an Interview, 9th June 2022.","113 the funeral ceremony. Fr. Joseph Edakkery, the Vicar Provincial of St. Paul\u2019s Province, Mysuru was the co- celebrant. Rev. Fr. Johny Panamthottathil CMI, Provincial, Calicut Province, Rev. Fr. Augustine Thottakkara CMI, Rector, Dharmaram College, Bangalore, Fr. Francis Ponnumpurayidom OFM Cap., Fr. Thomas Marangatt, Fr. Thomas Olickal, Parish Priest of Thudanganad, the home parish of Fr. Amatus, were also there to assist the ceremony. A good number o f other priests, sisters and the faithful attended the funeral service. The words of Rev. Fr. James Mekara CMI, w h o delivered the funeral message on the occasion are worth mentioning here: Today, all of us are here to bid the final farewell to our dear Fr. Amatus for his journey to eternity. He was a shining light and enduring inspiration in our life and will be so forever. Let us commend his holy soul into the hands of Jesus, the Lord of Life and Death. Fr. Amatus who transformed his life into a song of love, the moment of his death is a moment of great victory. He was a man who accepted his life with all its ups and downs, pain and agony, success, and failure from the hands of Almighty with a steadfast mind. He lived a life of utmost","114 nobility, dignity, complete contentment, and magnanimity. He was a man of prayer who never resorted on falsehood and was a synonym for innocence and integrity in religious life. As a man of prayer, he stood on his knees with extended hands in front of the Holy Eucharist even in the middle of the night inspiring and inviting all of us to higher levels of spiritual orientation. Being known as the God of Marakkadavu, Fr. Amatus led an extraordinary life of penance and sacrifices. The small stone pieces that he used as his pillow and the cecile used for personal penance were secretly covered under his mat. He was a man of mortifications and rigorous fasting. He was a man who lived with a heart full of happiness in the Lord without having any complaint about any material deficiencies. All his possessions contained in a small and old trunk box which included a set of religious habit and his prayer books. As man of meticulous accountability, he received only the bare minimum and was eager to give others the maximum. He was a man","115 of limited, but dignified, meaningful and inspiring words. He did not accumulate anything for his welfare and comfort. He was a holy religious who preserved the sanctity of life by having a deeper experience of the Lord whom he met at the bottom of his heart in and through his religious commitment. He reflected the spirit of Christ in his life with admirable luminosity and depth. His eighty-two years of life on earth was a blessing for all of us. Yes, we are standing in front of the body of a priest whose holy soul found his treasure in utter poverty. A man who sought and found the will of God at every moment of his life and lived that without blemish. Here lies the body of a holy religious who walked in front of us, showing us the path of holiness. He respected each one of us and our intentions and goals. He led us to green pastures of spiritual nourishment. He reflected the real face of the Fatherhood of God and invited us to experience the power of the divine within us. With unfailing attentiveness, he waited for the coming of the spouse of his soul. Now he is not away from us but he is spiritually quite near to all our hearts.","116 He lived in Christ, the way, life, and truth. His death is his re-birth in heaven. Fr. Amatus left us for heaven on the day of the feast of the Nativity of our Lady after receiving all the sacraments needed for the purification and sanctification of his soul, to enjoy the heavenly bliss with the Lord. As his noble soul rests in peace with the Lord, he will shower upon us flowers of blessings to live our religious life after his example with dignity and sanctity.33 Some years after the death of Fr. Amatus, one of his nieces, Mrs. Sali Joshy Pulickal (His sister\u2019s daughter) narrates about a miracle that happened by the intercession of Fr. Amatus: I often used to help him to cross the roads to catch bus, while he returns after visiting our home. Like a child he used to walk with me. He did not use to speak much. He was very much austere and ate very little. He was so simple and was having fatherly affection towards me, even though he visited us only a few times, as I remember. I was having a terrible problem of giddiness due to severe spondylosis. I was struggling with this problem. Sometimes I was not 33 Sukruthavazhiye, pp.17-19.","117 even able to get up from the bed for longer time. On one Sunday, as I was preparing to go to the parish church, I got my giddiness problem so worsened and I was unable to sit or stand. Suddenly I remembered Fr. Amatus and prayed intensely for his intercession so that I could attend the Holy Mass on that day. After some time, I was feeling relieved and could go to the church to attend the Holy Mass. Surprisingly for the next one year I did not experience this problem. Suddenly, again another day the same problem recurred back and again prayed for his intercession with tears and that problem disappeared for ever. Till this date I did not get such a disturbance. I consider it as big miracle, in spite of the arguments that such diseases are self-curing. I always have the feeling that Fr. Amatus is near to me and is spiritually blessing me always.34 The life of Fr. Amatus is a big challenge before all of us and he reminds us of our responsibility to think 34 From an interview with Miss. Sali, the niece of Fr. Amatus, on 7\/09\/2022, Carmel Bhavan, Mysuru.","118 seriously and to make a definitive turn in our spiritual life. Practicing Christian virtues is not a sign of weakness but is the result of our inner strength that we achieve by way of leading a grace-filled life with the Lord. It does not mean that all of us are sinners, but do we not feel that something is lacking in us? We struggle to make history on our own, but forget the truth, that left alone we become irrelevant to history. Every saint is sign-board from heaven, inviting each one of us to travel with the Lord to inherit eternity by being filled with saving grace of the Almighty at the expense of our earthly life. \u201cAnd he said to me, My grace is sufficient for you: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest on me.\u201d (2 Corinthians 12:9) Let us not ignore it.","Appendix I","120","121 II","122","123","124 III","125","126 IV","127","128"]