Swamp Monster Island Movie Screenplay by Dana Holyfield

100.EXT. HOSPITAL - DAYThe Reporter is standing in front of the local hospital wherea crowd has gathered. REPORTER It looks like there has been a predicted hunting accident.Sheriff Buck corners Don Thomas. SHERIFF TOM See what I mean. DON THOMAS I can’t help it if those fools don’t know what they are doing out there. SHERIFF BUCK But you can help being an instigator. DON THOMAS I don’t think you have grounds to do anything about it, legally. SHERIFF BUCK I’m sure I can come up with something legit before it’s over with.Sheriff Buck wanders off. Don Thomas notices Lanaapproaching him. LANA Safety huh? A bullet in the leg was real safe. DON THOMAS Accidents happen. LANA Is all this whoop-de-do necessary? DON THOMAS I’ll call off the reward if you agree to sell me the island since you won’t marry me. LANA Marry you? You never asked.

101. DON THOMAS Will you marry me? LANA No. And I am not selling the island to you Don Thomas, so give it up. DON THOMAS You should know by now that I don’t give up that easily. I’ll just wait for the Parish to auction it at the tax sale!Lana’s eyes widen with worry. Nile overheard that. Herealizes Lana’s island is in trouble.EXT. LAND TAX ADSESSOR OFFICE - DAYLana approaches BETSY at the desk with the envelopecontaining the over-due taxes. LANA Hi Betsy. What’s the minimum payment I can make on our land taxes to keep it from going to auction? BETSY Your taxes have been paid off. LANA Huh! By who? BETSY He was very handsome and had an accent. LANA Accent? BETSY Californian I think.Lana dashes out of the office.EXT. BAIT SHOP - DAYLana parks her car beside Nile’s jeep at the baitshop.

102.INT. BAIT SHOP - DAYNile is sharing a pot of coffee with Mr. Bob, talking aboutthings. NILESo what did you think when you sawit? MR. BOBIt wasn’t nothing I wanted to comeface to face with again if I couldhelp it. But Ford was relentlesson finding out more about it. NILEWhy? MR. BOBHe once said it was smarter thanthe average human. In fact, hesaid it could have been half-human. NILEMaybe Ford got closer than any ofyou knew about. MR. BOBI wouldn’t doubt it. He was alwaysout there when he wasn’t working.They turn when Lana enters. MR. BOB (CONT’D)There you are! We were gettingworried that you were gonna put DonThomas’ head on a crawfish platter. LANAI thought about it, but I was atthe assessor's office.She looks at Nile for an explanation. Mr. Bob can tell thatLana wants to talk to Nile alone. MR. BOBI think I need to make another potof coffee.Mr. Bob gets up and walks to the back room. Arty enters justin time to hear...

103. LANAIt was really nice of you to payour taxes, but that was notnecessary. NILEI think it was necessary if we aregoing to convert the island into aprotected sanctuary.Lana is stunned. So is Arty who dashes up. ARTYHow? NILEIt will take some paperwork and alittle help in helpful places, butluckily I have connections.Arty is thrilled. ARTYAwesome! LANAWhy would you do this for us? NILEIt’s not just for you. It’s forwhatever it is that yourgrandfather and your son is tryingto protect out there. ARTYBut what about all the crazedmonster hunters who will try tocatch him or shoot him before then? NILEI have an idea. Can Arty come withme to the swamp? LANASure. Just be careful out there.Lana watches as the two guys head for the boat.

104.INT. SWAMP - DAYA very large icechest sitting in a trailer hitched to a four-wheeler, sits below the tree where the dead wild boar wasstuck. They drag down the wild boar and put him in theicechest trying not to gag. ARTY That sticks. NILE I’m going to neutralize that smell soon as we get back.They get on the four-wheeler and drive on.EXT. BACK AT THE SHED - LATER DAYNile has arranged boar hair and hog intestines in the extralarge icechest with a few other convincing props. NILE Okay, lets ice him down.Arty pours ice on top of it.EXT. BAIT SHOP - DAYNile is talking with the REPORTER outside the bait shop. Hebriefly opens the icechest and lets the cameraman gets aquick shot of the hairy, bloody critter in the icechest. NILE Unfortunately it was killed instead of captured live. But it was a life or death situation. We’ll run DNA tests to confirm that it is indeed the Swamp Monster. REPORTER Who was the hunter?Nile turns to his partner, SKIP, who has flown in to help himout. Skip steps up in character of a redneck hunter. SKIP I was! That big, hairy critter came down the tree after me, and I had no choice in the matter. It was him or me. So, here I am, and there he is, what’s left of him.

105.Skip winks at Nile, who is keeping a straight face, like Artyand the rest of them who know about it. REPORTER So will he collect a reward even though it’s not still alive? SKIP I better get a reward! Dog-Gone-It. DON THOMAS I will pay the reward if I can have the remains. NILE Sorry, Mr. Thomas, but considering the circumstances, this will be taken out of our hands from here.Two guys in WHITE COATS arrive in a white van and load thelarge icechest into the van and take it away. One of the guysgives a thumbs up to Nile as he drives off -- they’re in onit too.Nile leans over and whispers to Arty. NILE (CONT’D) Told you I have friends in helpful places.The Reporter turns back to the camera... REPORTER Okay, Folks. We will follow up on the DNA results when they are in. NILE Meanwhile, be sure to visit the grand opening of the Honey Island Swamp Monster Museum this summer where all the evidence will be on display.Lana and Arty look at each other, surprised. REPORTER The Swamp Monster Museum! That would make a fun and educational field trip. Well, this concludes this segment on the hunt for the Honey Island Swamp Monster. Stay tune for the weather at 5:00.As the crowd disperses, Lana approaches Nile.

106. LANA So, should I assume that means you are going to help us fix up the museum? NILE You can assume that. LANA What will that cost me? NILE Hmmm. Let’s see. Maybe the recipe to your grandfather’s muscadine wine? LANA It seems if you are planning to produce muscadine wine, you need muscadines. Just so happens we have plenty muscadine vines on our island already producing berries that are a little tough on the outside, but very soft and sweet on the inside.Nile remembers that moment in the swamp. NILE That is true. LANA Maybe you would consider a partnership building a wine vineyard? NILE Just so you know, a wine vineyard takes a lot of tender loving care and patience to get off the ground. LANA Does that mean you will stick around a while? NILE I’ll stay as long as you want me to.They finally embrace in a kiss. Arty an Emily watch happily.Skip is also happy for his friend.

107. SKIP (under breath) ‘Bout damn time.Don Thomas heard that. He gets suspicious of Skip, andwonders if he knew Nile before the big hunt.EXT. SWAMP MONSTER MUSEUM - DAYNile drives the last nail into the museum, then steps back toadmire the building with Lana, Arty and Emily. NILE That should do it. ARTY It’s awesome. LANA Pap would be so proud. EMILY Can we decorate the inside now? ARTY (to Emily) We’re not painting it pink.EXT./INT. SWAMP MONSTER MUSEUM - GRAND OPENING DAYTourists and locals are browsing through the museum. TheReporter is back covering the grand opening.Arty inspects the FAKE DNA RESULTS hanging in a frame on thewall that confirm that the DNA was an unknown species andmost probably the Honey Island Swamp Monster. There is anold photo on the wall of his Pap holding the tracks. ThenArty looks at the plaster tracks on display in a glass case.He turns to the wooden crate protected behind a rope. Helooks over at the old 8mm film continuously showing on thescreen. He then stops in front of the enormous statue of theHoney Island Swamp Monster. His friends, Callie, Drake, andSidney join him. DRAKE That’s super cool, Dude.Mikey and Ted approach them.

108. TEDI still think it’d been better ifyou had the real one mounted on aCypress stump in here.Steve calls Ted over leaving Mikey and Arty alone.Arty extends his hand to shake Mikey’s. ARTYLet’s call a truce. MIKEYTruce. ARTYI think we can put our family dramabehind us. There’s no need to staymad and blame each other for whathappened before we were born. MIKEYOkay, cool. And by the way, thatstinky hog y’all drug out the treedidn’t fool me. But, your secretis safe with me, because it’s kindof cool that we have a real swampmonster lurking round out there.Mikey grins. Arty grins back. Ted calls Mikey... TEDCome on Mikey! Let’s go mount asquirrel! MIKEYSee ya on the bus.Mikey heads off with Ted.Drake steps up to Arty. Callie and Sidney join them. DRAKEI hope the squirrel looks betterthan the wood rat he mounted forshow and tell. SIDNEYNo doubt.Callie turns to Arty.

109. CALLIE Thanks for letting me hang out with y’all this summer. ARTY I heard you’re going back home soon. CALLIE Yeah, but we will be back.They notice a WOMAN in marine uniform come through the door.It is Callie’s Mom. CALLIE (CONT’D) Mom!Callie rushes to embrace her Mom. Arty is happy for Callie.Arty, Drake and Sidney mosey on outside. DRAKE What are you doing the rest of the day? ARTY Pick some muscadines. DRAKE Can we come this time? ARTY If you promise not to freak out if you see it. DRAKE Promise.Emily catches up to them. EMILY Can I come, too? ARTY No, you’re too little. EMILY Please, Arty. ARTY Oh, alright. Since you said please.OUTSIDE...

110.Arty picks up a bucket that has a bag of Snicker Bars in it.The gang heads into the woods as Lana and Nile watch. LANA Be back before dark! ARTY We will!THE END!