["\\\"Who\tcarries\tthem?\\\" \\\"Sometimes\tPotter,\tbut\tmostly\tit's\tShekels.\\\" \\\"Now\tcome!\twho\tcan\tfind\tfault\twith\tsuch\tpretty\tmake-believe\tas\tthat?\\\" \\\"But\tit\tain't\tmake-believe,\tMarse\tTom.\tShe\tdoes\tsend\tthem.\\\" \\\"Yes,\tI\tdon't\tdoubt\tthat\tpart\tof\tit.\\\" \\\"Do\tyou\tdoubt\tthey\tget\tthem,\tsir?\\\" \\\"Certainly.\tDon't\tyou?\\\" \\\"No,\t sir.\t Animals\t talk\t to\t one\t another.\t I\t know\t it\t perfectly\t well,\t Marse\t Tom, and\tI\tain't\tsaying\tit\tby\tguess.\\\" \\\"What\ta\tcurious\tsuperstition!\\\" \\\"It\tain't\ta\tsuperstition,\tMarse\tTom.\tLook\tat\tthat\tShekels--look\tat\thim,\tnow.\tIs he\tlistening,\tor\tain't\the?\tNow\tyou\tsee!\the's\tturned\this\thead\taway.\tIt's\tbecause\the was\t caught--caught\t in\t the\t act.\t I'll\t ask\t you--could\t a\t Christian\t look\t any\t more ashamed\tthan\twhat\the\tlooks\tnow?--lay\tdown!\tYou\t see?\t he\twas\t going\t to\t sneak out.\t Don't\t tell\t me,\t Marse\t Tom!\t If\t animals\t don't\t talk,\t I\t miss\t my\t guess.\t And Shekels\tis\tthe\tworst.\tHe\tgoes\tand\ttells\tthe\tanimals\teverything\tthat\thappens\tin\tthe officers'\tquarters;\tand\tif\the's\tshort\tof\tfacts,\the\tinvents\tthem.\tHe\thasn't\tany\tmore principle\tthan\ta\tblue\tjay;\tand\tas\tfor\tmorals,\the's\tempty.\tLook\tat\thim\tnow;\tlook\tat him\t grovel.\t He\t knows\t what\t I\t am\t saying,\t and\t he\t knows\t it's\t the\t truth.\t You\t see, yourself,\tthat\the\tcan\tfeel\tshame;\tit's\tthe\tonly\tvirtue\the's\tgot.\tIt's\twonderful\thow they\tfind\tout\teverything\tthat's\tgoing\ton--the\tanimals.\tThey--\\\" \\\"Do\tyou\treally\tbelieve\tthey\tdo,\tDorcas?\\\" \\\"I\tdon't\tonly\tjust\tbelieve\tit,\tMarse\tTom,\tI\tknow\tit.\tDay\tbefore\tyesterday\tthey knew\t something\t was\t going\t to\t happen.\t They\t were\t that\t excited,\t and\t whispering around\ttogether;\twhy,\tanybody\tcould\tsee\tthat\tthey--\tBut\tmy!\tI\tmust\tget\tback\tto her,\tand\tI\thaven't\tgot\tto\tmy\terrand\tyet.\\\" \\\"What\tis\tit,\tDorcas?\\\" \\\"Well,\tit's\ttwo\tor\tthree\tthings.\tOne\tis,\tthe\tdoctor\tdon't\tsalute\twhen\the\tcomes\t. .\t.\tNow,\tMarse\tTom,\tit\tain't\tanything\tto\tlaugh\tat,\tand\tso--\\\" \\\"Well,\tthen,\tforgive\tme;\tI\tdidn't\tmean\tto\tlaugh--I\tgot\tcaught\tunprepared.\\\" \\\"You\t see,\t she\t don't\t want\t to\t hurt\t the\t doctor's\t feelings,\t so\t she\t don't\t say anything\tto\thim\tabout\tit;\tbut\tshe\tis\talways\tpolite,\therself,\tand\tit\thurts\tthat\tkind of\tpeople\tto\tbe\trude\tto\tthem.\\\" \\\"I'll\thave\tthat\tdoctor\thanged.\\\" \\\"Marse\tTom,\tshe\tdon't\twant\thim\thanged.\tShe--\\\" \\\"Well,\tthen,\tI'll\thave\thim\tboiled\tin\toil.\\\" \\\"But\tshe\tdon't\twant\thim\tboiled.\tI--\\\"","\\\"Oh,\tvery\twell,\tvery\twell,\tI\tonly\twant\tto\tplease\ther;\tI'll\thave\thim\tskinned.\\\" \\\"Why,\tshe\tdon't\twant\thim\tskinned;\tit\twould\tbreak\ther\theart.\tNow--\\\" \\\"Woman,\tthis\tis\tperfectly\tunreasonable.\tWhat\tin\tthe\tnation\tdoes\tshe\twant?\\\" \\\"Marse\tTom,\tif\tyou\twould\tonly\tbe\ta\tlittle\tpatient,\tand\tnot\tfly\toff\tthe\thandle at\tthe\tleast\tlittle\tthing.\tWhy,\tshe\tonly\twants\tyou\tto\tspeak\tto\thim.\\\" \\\"Speak\t to\t him!\t Well,\t upon\t my\t word!\t All\t this\t unseemly\t rage\t and\t row\t about such\ta--a--\tDorcas,\tI\tnever\tsaw\tyou\tcarry\ton\tlike\tthis\tbefore.\tYou\thave\talarmed the\tsentry;\the\tthinks\tI\tam\tbeing\tassassinated;\the\tthinks\tthere's\ta\tmutiny,\ta\trevolt, an\tinsurrection;\the--\\\" \\\"Marse\t Tom,\t you\t are\t just\t putting\t on;\t you\t know\t it\t perfectly\t well;\t I\t don't know\t what\t makes\t you\t act\t like\t that--but\t you\t always\t did,\t even\t when\t you\t was little,\tand\tyou\tcan't\tget\tover\tit,\tI\treckon.\tAre\tyou\tover\tit\tnow,\tMarse\tTom?\\\" \\\"Oh,\t well,\t yes;\t but\t it\t would\t try\t anybody\t to\t be\t doing\t the\t best\t he\t could, offering\t every\t kindness\t he\t could\t think\t of,\t only\t to\t have\t it\t rejected\t with contumely\tand\t.\t.\t.\tOh,\twell,\tlet\tit\tgo;\tit's\tno\tmatter--I'll\ttalk\tto\tthe\tdoctor.\tIs\tthat satisfactory,\tor\tare\tyou\tgoing\tto\tbreak\tout\tagain?\\\" \\\"Yes,\t sir,\t it\t is;\t and\t it's\t only\t right\t to\t talk\t to\t him,\t too,\t because\t it's\t just\t as\t she says;\t she's\t trying\t to\t keep\t up\t discipline\t in\t the\t Rangers,\t and\t this\t insubordination of\this\tis\ta\tbad\texample\tfor\tthem--now\tain't\tit\tso,\tMarse\tTom?\\\" \\\"Well,\t there\t is\t reason\t in\t it,\t I\t can't\t deny\t it;\t so\t I\t will\t speak\t to\t him,\t though\t at bottom\t I\t think\t hanging\t would\t be\t more\t lasting.\t What\t is\t the\t rest\t of\t your\t errand, Dorcas?\\\" \\\"Of\t course\t her\t room\t is\t Ranger\t headquarters\t now,\t Marse\t Tom,\t while\t she's sick.\t Well,\t soldiers\t of\t the\t cavalry\t and\t the\t dragoons\t that\t are\t off\t duty\t come\t and get\ther\tsentries\tto\tlet\tthem\trelieve\tthem\tand\tserve\tin\ttheir\tplace.\tIt's\tonly\tout\tof affection,\t sir,\t and\t because\t they\t know\t military\t honors\t please\t her,\t and\t please\t the children\ttoo,\tfor\ther\tsake;\tand\tthey\tdon't\tbring\ttheir\tmuskets;\tand\tso--\\\" \\\"I've\t noticed\t them\t there,\t but\t didn't\t twig\t the\t idea.\t They\t are\t standing\t guard, are\tthey?\\\" \\\"Yes,\t sir,\t and\t she\t is\t afraid\t you\t will\t reprove\t them\t and\t hurt\t their\t feelings,\t if you\tsee\tthem\tthere;\tso\tshe\tbegs,\tif--if\tyou\tdon't\tmind\tcoming\tin\tthe\tback\tway--\\\" \\\"Bear\tme\tup,\tDorcas;\tdon't\tlet\tme\tfaint.\\\" \\\"There--sit\tup\t and\t behave,\t Marse\tTom.\tYou\tare\t not\t going\t to\t faint;\tyou\t are only\tpretending--you\tused\tto\tact\tjust\tso\twhen\tyou\twas\tlittle;\tit\tdoes\tseem\ta\tlong time\tfor\tyou\tto\tget\tgrown\tup.\\\" \\\"Dorcas,\t the\t way\t the\t child\t is\t progressing,\t I\t shall\t be\t out\t of\t my\t job\t before long--she'll\thave\tthe\twhole\tpost\tin\ther\thands.\tI\tmust\tmake\ta\tstand,\tI\tmust\tnot\tgo","down\t without\t a\t struggle.\t These\t encroachments.\t .\t .\t .\t Dorcas,\t what\t do\t you\t think she\twill\tthink\tof\tnext?\\\" \\\"Marse\tTom,\tshe\tdon't\tmean\tany\tharm.\\\" \\\"Are\tyou\tsure\tof\tit?\\\" \\\"Yes,\tMarse\tTom.\\\" \\\"You\tfeel\tsure\tshe\thas\tno\tulterior\tdesigns?\\\" \\\"I\tdon't\tknow\twhat\tthat\tis,\tMarse\tTom,\tbut\tI\tknow\tshe\thasn't.\\\" \\\"Very\t well,\t then,\t for\t the\t present\t I\t am\t satisfied.\t What\t else\t have\t you\t come about?\\\" \\\"I\t reckon\t I\t better\t tell\t you\t the\t whole\t thing\t first,\t Marse\t Tom,\t then\t tell\t you what\t she\t wants.\t There's\t been\t an\t emeute,\t as\t she\t calls\t it.\t It\t was\t before\t she\t got back\twith\tBB.\tThe\tofficer\tof\tthe\tday\treported\tit\tto\ther\tthis\tmorning.\tIt\thappened at\t her\t fort.\t There\t was\t a\t fuss\t betwixt\t Major-General\t Tommy\t Drake\t and Lieutenant-Colonel\tAgnes\tFrisbie,\tand\the\tsnatched\ther\tdoll\taway,\twhich\tis\tmade of\t white\t kid\t stuffed\t with\t sawdust,\t and\t tore\t every\t rag\t of\t its\t clothes\t off,\t right before\tthem\tall,\tand\tis\tunder\tarrest,\tand\tthe\tcharge\tis\tconduct\tun--\\\" \\\"Yes,\tI\tknow--conduct\tunbecoming\tan\tofficer\tand\ta\tgentleman--a\tplain\tcase, too,\tit\tseems\tto\tme.\tThis\tis\ta\tserious\tmatter.\tWell,\twhat\tis\ther\tpleasure?\\\" \\\"Well,\t Marse\t Tom,\t she\t has\t summoned\t a\t court-martial,\t but\t the\t doctor\t don't think\t she\t is\t well\t enough\t to\t preside\t over\t it,\t and\t she\t says\t there\t ain't\t anybody competent\tbut\ther,\tbecause\tthere's\ta\tmajor-general\tconcerned;\tand\tso\tshe--she-- well,\t she\t says,\t would\t you\t preside\t over\t it\t for\t her?\t .\t .\t .\t Marse\t Tom,\t sit\t up!\t You ain't\tany\tmore\tgoing\tto\tfaint\tthan\tShekels\tis.\\\" \\\"Look\t here,\t Dorcas,\t go\t along\t back,\t and\t be\t tactful.\t Be\t persuasive;\t don't\t fret her;\ttell\ther\tit's\tall\tright,\tthe\tmatter\tis\tin\tmy\thands,\tbut\tit\tisn't\tgood\tform\tto\thurry so\tgrave\ta\tmatter\tas\tthis.\tExplain\tto\ther\tthat\twe\thave\tto\tgo\tby\tprecedent,\tand\tthat I\tbelieve\tthis\tone\tto\tbe\tnew.\tIn\tfact,\tyou\tcan\tsay\tI\tknow\tthat\tnothing\tjust\tlike\tit has\t happened\t in\t our\t army,\t therefore\t I\t must\t be\t guided\t by\t European\t precedents, and\tmust\tgo\tcautiously\tand\texamine\tthem\tcarefully.\tTell\ther\tnot\tto\tbe\timpatient, it\twill\ttake\tme\tseveral\tdays,\tbut\tit\twill\tall\tcome\tout\tright,\tand\tI\twill\tcome\tover and\treport\tprogress\tas\tI\tgo\talong.\tDo\tyou\tget\tthe\tidea,\tDorcas?\\\" \\\"I\tdon't\tknow\tas\tI\tdo,\tsir.\\\" \\\"Well,\t it's\t this.\t You\t see,\t it\t won't\t ever\t do\t for\t me,\t a\t brigadier\t in\t the\t regular army,\t to\t preside\t over\t that\t infant\t court-martial--there\t isn't\t any\t precedent\t for\t it, don't\t you\t see.\t Very\t well.\t I\t will\t go\t on\t examining\t authorities\t and\t reporting progress\t until\t she\t is\t well\t enough\t to\t get\t me\t out\t of\t this\t scrape\t by\t presiding herself.\tDo\tyou\tget\tit\tnow?\\\"","\\\"Oh,\tyes,\tsir,\tI\tget\tit,\tand\tit's\tgood,\tI'll\tgo\tand\tfix\tit\twith\ther.\tLay\tdown!\tand stay\twhere\tyou\tare.\\\" \\\"Why,\twhat\tharm\tis\the\tdoing?\\\" \\\"Oh,\tit\tain't\tany\tharm,\tbut\tit\tjust\tvexes\tme\tto\tsee\thim\tact\tso.\\\" \\\"What\twas\the\tdoing?\\\" \\\"Can't\tyou\tsee,\tand\thim\tin\tsuch\ta\tsweat?\tHe\twas\tstarting\tout\tto\tspread\tit\tall over\t the\t post.\t Now\t I\t reckon\t you\t won't\t deny,\t any\t more,\t that\t they\t go\t and\t tell everything\tthey\thear,\tnow\tthat\tyou've\tseen\tit\twith\tyo'\town\teyes.\\\" \\\"Well,\t I\t don't\t like\t to\t acknowledge\t it,\t Dorcas,\t but\t I\t don't\t see\t how\t I\t can consistently\tstick\t to\t my\tdoubts\tin\tthe\tface\t of\tsuch\t overwhelming\t proof\t as\t this dog\tis\tfurnishing.\\\" \\\"There,\t now,\t you've\t got\t in\t yo'\t right\t mind\t at\t last!\t I\t wonder\t you\t can\t be\t so stubborn,\tMarse\tTom.\tBut\tyou\talways\twas,\teven\twhen\tyou\twas\tlittle.\tI'm\tgoing now.\\\" \\\"Look\t here;\t tell\t her\t that\t in\t view\t of\t the\t delay,\t it\t is\t my\t judgment\t that\t she ought\tto\tenlarge\tthe\taccused\ton\this\tparole.\\\" \\\"Yes,\tsir,\tI'll\ttell\ther.\tMarse\tTom?\\\" \\\"Well?\\\" \\\"She\t can't\t get\t to\t Soldier\t Boy,\t and\t he\t stands\t there\t all\t the\t time,\t down\t in\t the mouth\t and\t lonesome;\t and\t she\t says\t will\t you\t shake\t hands\t with\t him\t and\t comfort him?\tEverybody\tdoes.\\\" \\\"It's\ta\tcurious\tkind\tof\tlonesomeness;\tbut,\tall\tright,\tI\twill.\\\" 11\tSEVERAL\tMONTHS\tLATER. ANTONIO\tAND\tTHORNDIKE \\\"Thorndike,\tisn't\tthat\tPlug\tyou're\triding\tan\tasset\tof\tthe\tscrap\tyou\tand\tBuffalo Bill\thad\twith\tthe\tlate\tBlake\tHaskins\tand\this\tpal\ta\tfew\tmonths\tback?\\\" \\\"Yes,\tthis\tis\tMongrel--and\tnot\ta\thalf-bad\thorse,\teither.\\\" \\\"I've\tnoticed\the\tkeeps\tup\this\tlick\tfirst-rate.\tSay--isn't\tit\ta\tgaudy\tmorning?\\\" \\\"Right\tyou\tare!\\\" \\\"Thorndike,\tit's\tAndalusian!\tand\twhen\tthat's\tsaid,\tall's\tsaid.\\\" \\\"Andalusian\tand\tOregonian,\tAntonio!\tPut\tit\tthat\tway,\tand\tyou\thave\tmy\tvote. Being\ta\tnative\tup\tthere,\tI\tknow.\tYou\tbeing\tAndalusian-born--\\\" \\\"Can\t speak\t with\t authority\t for\t that\t patch\t of\t paradise?\t Well,\t I\t can.\t Like\t the Don!\tlike\tSancho!\tThis\tis\tthe\tcorrect\tAndalusian\tdawn\tnow--crisp,\tfresh,\tdewy, fragrant,\tpungent--\\\"","\\\"'What\tthough\tthe\tspicy\tbreezes. Blow\tsoft\to'er\tCeylon's\tisle--' --git\tup,\tyou\told\tcow!\tstumbling\tlike\tthat\twhen\twe've\tjust\tbeen\tpraising\tyou! out\ton\ta\tscout\tand\tcan't\tlive\tup\tto\tthe\thonor\tany\tbetter\tthan\tthat?\tAntonio,\thow long\thave\tyou\tbeen\tout\there\tin\tthe\tPlains\tand\tthe\tRockies?\\\" \\\"More\tthan\tthirteen\tyears.\\\" \\\"It's\ta\tlong\ttime.\tDon't\tyou\tever\tget\thomesick?\\\" \\\"Not\ttill\tnow.\\\" \\\"Why\tnow?--after\tsuch\ta\tlong\tcure.\\\" \\\"These\tpreparations\tof\tthe\tretiring\tcommandant's\thave\tstarted\tit\tup.\\\" \\\"Of\tcourse.\tIt's\tnatural.\\\" \\\"It\t keeps\t me\t thinking\t about\t Spain.\t I\t know\t the\t region\t where\t the\t Seventh's child's\taunt\tlives;\tI\tknow\tall\tthe\tlovely\tcountry\tfor\tmiles\taround;\tI'll\tbet\tI've\tseen her\t aunt's\t villa\t many\t a\t time;\t I'll\t bet\t I've\t been\t in\t it\t in\t those\t pleasant\t old\t times when\tI\twas\ta\tSpanish\tgentleman.\\\" \\\"They\tsay\tthe\tchild\tis\twild\tto\tsee\tSpain.\\\" \\\"It's\tso;\tI\tknow\tit\tfrom\twhat\tI\thear.\\\" \\\"Haven't\tyou\ttalked\twith\ther\tabout\tit?\\\" \\\"No.\t I've\t avoided\tit.\tI\t should\tsoon\tbe\t as\twild\tas\t she\t is.\t That\twould\tnot\tbe comfortable.\\\" \\\"I\twish\tI\twas\tgoing,\tAntonio.\tThere's\ttwo\tthings\tI'd\tgive\ta\tlot\tto\tsee.\tOne's\ta railroad.\\\" \\\"She'll\tsee\tone\twhen\tshe\tstrikes\tMissouri.\\\" \\\"The\tother's\ta\tbull-fight.\\\" \\\"I've\tseen\tlots\tof\tthem;\tI\twish\tI\tcould\tsee\tanother.\\\" \\\"I\t don't\t know\t anything\t about\t it,\t except\t in\t a\t mixed-up,\t foggy\t way,\t Antonio, but\tI\tknow\tenough\tto\tknow\tit's\tgrand\tsport.\\\" \\\"The\tgrandest\tin\tthe\tworld!\tThere's\tno\tother\tsport\tthat\tbegins\twith\tit.\tI'll\ttell you\t what\t I've\t seen,\t then\t you\t can\t judge.\t It\t was\t my\t first,\t and\t it's\t as\t vivid\t to\t me now\t as\t it\t was\t when\t I\t saw\t it.\t It\t was\t a\t Sunday\t afternoon,\t and\t beautiful\t weather, and\tmy\tuncle,\tthe\tpriest,\ttook\tme\tas\ta\treward\tfor\tbeing\ta\tgood\tboy\tand\tbecause of\tmy\town\taccord\tand\twithout\tanybody\tasking\tme\tI\thad\tbankrupted\tmy\tsavings- box\t and\t given\t the\t money\t to\t a\t mission\t that\t was\t civilizing\t the\t Chinese\t and sweetening\ttheir\tlives\tand\tsoftening\ttheir\thearts\twith\tthe\tgentle\tteachings\tof\tour religion,\tand\tI\twish\tyou\tcould\thave\tseen\twhat\twe\tsaw\tthat\tday,\tThorndike. \\\"The\tamphitheater\twas\tpacked,\tfrom\tthe\tbull-ring\tto\tthe\thighest\trow--twelve","thousand\tpeople\tin\tone\tcircling\tmass,\tone\tslanting,\tsolid\tmass--royalties,\tnobles, clergy,\t ladies,\t gentlemen,\t state\t officials,\t generals,\t admirals,\t soldiers,\t sailors, lawyers,\t thieves,\t merchants,\t brokers,\t cooks,\t housemaids,\t scullery-maids, doubtful\t women,\t dudes,\t gamblers,\t beggars,\t loafers,\t tramps,\t American\t ladies, gentlemen,\t preachers,\t English\t ladies,\t gentlemen,\t preachers,\t German\t ditto, French\tditto,\tand\tso\ton\tand\tso\ton,\tall\tthe\tworld\trepresented:\tSpaniards\tto\tadmire and\tpraise,\tforeigners\tto\tenjoy\tand\tgo\thome\tand\tfind\tfault--there\tthey\twere,\tone solid,\tsloping,\tcircling\tsweep\tof\trippling\tand\tflashing\tcolor\tunder\tthe\tdownpour of\t the\t summer\t sun--just\t a\t garden,\t a\t gaudy,\t gorgeous\t flower-garden!\t Children munching\t oranges,\t six\t thousand\t fans\t fluttering\t and\t glimmering,\t everybody happy,\t everybody\t chatting\t gayly\t with\t their\t intimates,\t lovely\t girl-faces\t smiling recognition\t and\t salutation\t to\t other\t lovely\t girl-faces,\t gray\t old\t ladies\t and gentlemen\t dealing\t in\t the\t like\t exchanges\t with\t each\t other--ah,\t such\t a\t picture\t of cheery\t contentment\t and\t glad\t anticipation!\t not\t a\t mean\t spirit,\t nor\t a\t sordid\t soul, nor\ta\tsad\theart\tthere--ah,\tThorndike,\tI\twish\tI\tcould\tsee\tit\tagain. \\\"Suddenly,\t the\t martial\t note\t of\t a\t bugle\t cleaves\t the\t hum\t and\t murmur--clear the\tring! \\\"They\t clear\t it.\t The\t great\t gate\t is\t flung\t open,\t and\t the\t procession\t marches\t in, splendidly\t costumed\t and\tglittering:\tthe\t marshals\tof\t the\tday,\tthen\t the\tpicadores on\t horseback,\t then\t the\t matadores\t on\t foot,\t each\t surrounded\t by\t his\t quadrille\t of chulos.\tThey\tmarch\tto\tthe\tbox\tof\tthe\tcity\tfathers,\tand\tformally\tsalute.\tThe\tkey\tis thrown,\t the\t bull-gate\t is\t unlocked.\t Another\t bugle\t blast--the\t gate\t flies\t open,\t the bull\t plunges\t in,\t furious,\t trembling,\t blinking\t in\t the\t blinding\t light,\t and\t stands there,\t a\t magnificent\t creature,\t center\t of\t those\t multitudinous\t and\t admiring\t eyes, brave,\t ready\t for\t battle,\t his\t attitude\t a\t challenge.\t He\t sees\t his\t enemy:\t horsemen sitting\t motionless,\t with\t long\t spears\t in\t rest,\t upon\t blindfolded\t brokendown\t nags, lean\tand\tstarved,\tfit\tonly\tfor\tsport\tand\tsacrifice,\tthen\tthe\tcarrion-heap. \\\"The\tbull\tmakes\ta\trush,\twith\tmurder\tin\this\teye,\tbut\ta\tpicador\tmeets\thim\twith a\t spear-thrust\t in\t the\t shoulder.\t He\t flinches\t with\t the\t pain,\t and\t the\t picador\t skips out\tof\tdanger.\tA\tburst\tof\tapplause\tfor\tthe\tpicador,\thisses\tfor\tthe\tbull.\tSome\tshout \\\"Cow!\\\"\tat\tthe\tbull,\tand\tcall\thim\toffensive\tnames.\tBut\the\tis\tnot\tlistening\tto\tthem, he\tis\tthere\tfor\tbusiness;\the\tis\tnot\tminding\tthe\tcloak-bearers\tthat\tcome\tfluttering around\t to\t confuse\t him;\t he\t chases\t this\t way,\t he\t chases\t that\t way,\t and\t hither\t and yon,\t scattering\t the\t nimble\t banderillos\t in\t every\t direction\t like\t a\t spray,\t and receiving\ttheir\tmaddening\tdarts\tin\this\tneck\tas\tthey\tdodge\tand\tfly--oh,\tbut\tit's\ta lively\tspectacle,\tand\tbrings\tdown\tthe\thouse!\tAh,\tyou\tshould\thear\tthe\tthundering roar\tthat\tgoes\tup\twhen\tthe\tgame\tis\tat\tits\twildest\tand\tbrilliant\tthings\tare\tdone!","\\\"Oh,\t that\t first\tbull,\tthat\tday,\twas\tgreat!\t From\t the\tmoment\tthe\tspirit\t of\t war rose\tto\tflood-tide\tin\thim\tand\the\tgot\tdown\tto\this\twork,\the\tbegan\tto\tdo\twonders. He\t tore\t his\t way\t through\t his\t persecutors,\t flinging\t one\t of\t them\t clear\t over\t the parapet;\the\tbowled\ta\thorse\tand\this\trider\tdown,\tand\tplunged\tstraight\tfor\tthe\tnext, got\thome\twith\this\thorns,\twounding\tboth\thorse\tand\tman;\ton\tagain,\there\tand\tthere and\tthis\tway\tand\tthat;\tand\tone\tafter\tanother\the\ttore\tthe\tbowels\tout\tof\ttwo\thorses so\tthat\tthey\tgrushed\tto\tthe\tground,\tand\tripped\ta\tthird\tone\tso\tbadly\tthat\talthough they\trushed\thim\tto\tcover\tand\tshoved\this\tbowels\tback\tand\tstuffed\tthe\trents\twith tow\t and\t rode\t him\t against\t the\t bull\t again,\t he\t couldn't\t make\t the\t trip;\t he\t tried\t to gallop,\tunder\tthe\tspur,\tbut\tsoon\treeled\tand\ttottered\tand\tfell,\tall\tin\ta\theap.\tFor\ta while,\t that\t bull-ring\t was\t the\t most\t thrilling\t and\t glorious\t and\t inspiring\t sight\t that ever\twas\tseen.\tThe\tbull\tabsolutely\tcleared\tit,\tand\tstood\tthere\talone!\tmonarch\tof the\t place.\t The\t people\t went\t mad\t for\t pride\t in\t him,\t and\t joy\t and\t delight,\t and\t you couldn't\thear\tyourself\tthink,\tfor\tthe\troar\tand\tboom\tand\tcrash\tof\tapplause.\\\" \\\"Antonio,\t it\t carries\t me\t clear\t out\t of\t myself\t just\t to\t hear\t you\t tell\t it;\t it\t must have\t been\t perfectly\t splendid.\t If\t I\t live,\t I'll\t see\t a\t bull-fight\t yet\t before\t I\t die.\t Did they\tkill\thim?\\\" \\\"Oh\tyes;\tthat\tis\twhat\tthe\tbull\tis\tfor.\tThey\ttired\thim\tout,\tand\tgot\thim\tat\tlast. He\tkept\trushing\tthe\tmatador,\twho\talways\tslipped\tsmartly\tand\tgracefully\taside\tin time,\t waiting\t for\t a\t sure\t chance;\t and\t at\t last\t it\t came;\t the\t bull\t made\t a\t deadly plunge\t for\t him--was\t avoided\t neatly,\t and\t as\t he\t sped\t by,\t the\t long\t sword\t glided silently\t into\t him,\t between\t left\t shoulder\t and\t spine--in\t and\t in,\t to\t the\t hilt.\t He crumpled\tdown,\tdying.\\\" \\\"Ah,\tAntonio,\tit\tis\tthe\tnoblest\tsport\tthat\tever\twas.\tI\twould\tgive\ta\tyear\tof\tmy life\tto\tsee\tit.\tIs\tthe\tbull\talways\tkilled?\\\" \\\"Yes.\tSometimes\ta\tbull\tis\ttimid,\tfinding\thimself\tin\tso\tstrange\ta\tplace,\tand\the stands\t trembling,\t or\t tries\t to\t retreat.\t Then\t everybody\t despises\t him\t for\t his cowardice\t and\t wants\t him\t punished\t and\t made\t ridiculous;\t so\t they\t hough\t him from\tbehind,\tand\tit\tis\tthe\tfunniest\tthing\tin\tthe\tworld\tto\tsee\thim\thobbling\taround on\this\tsevered\tlegs;\tthe\twhole\tvast\thouse\tgoes\tinto\thurricanes\tof\tlaughter\tover\tit; I\thave\tlaughed\ttill\tthe\ttears\tran\tdown\tmy\tcheeks\tto\tsee\tit.\tWhen\the\thas\tfurnished all\tthe\tsport\the\tcan,\the\tis\tnot\tany\tlonger\tuseful,\tand\tis\tkilled.\\\" \\\"Well,\t it\t is\t perfectly\t grand,\t Antonio,\t perfectly\t beautiful.\t Burning\t a\t nigger don't\tbegin.\\\" 12\tMONGREL\tAND\tTHE\tOTHER","HORSE \\\"Sage-Brush,\tyou\thave\tbeen\tlistening?\\\" \\\"Yes.\\\" \\\"Isn't\tit\tstrange?\\\" \\\"Well,\tno,\tMongrel,\tI\tdon't\tknow\tthat\tit\tis.\\\" \\\"Why\tdon't\tyou?\\\" \\\"I've\t seen\t a\t good\t many\t human\t beings\t in\t my\t time.\t They\t are\t created\t as\t they are;\t they\t cannot\t help\t it.\t They\t are\t only\t brutal\t because\t that\t is\t their\t make;\t brutes would\tbe\tbrutal\tif\tit\twas\ttheir\tmake.\\\" \\\"To\tme,\tSage-Brush,\tman\tis\tmost\tstrange\tand\tunaccountable.\tWhy\tshould\the treat\tdumb\tanimals\tthat\tway\twhen\tthey\tare\tnot\tdoing\tany\tharm?\\\" \\\"Man\t is\t not\t always\t like\t that,\t Mongrel;\t he\t is\t kind\t enough\t when\t he\t is\t not excited\tby\treligion.\\\" \\\"Is\tthe\tbull-fight\ta\treligious\tservice?\\\" \\\"I\tthink\tso.\tI\thave\theard\tso.\tIt\tis\theld\ton\tSunday.\\\" (A\treflective\tpause,\tlasting\tsome\tmoments.)\tThen: \\\"When\twe\tdie,\tSage-Brush,\tdo\twe\tgo\tto\theaven\tand\tdwell\twith\tman?\\\" \\\"My\t father\t thought\t not.\t He\t believed\t we\t do\t not\t have\t to\t go\t there\t unless\t we deserve\tit.\\\"","PART\tII\tIN\tSPAIN 13\tGENERAL\tALISON\tTO\tHIS MOTHER It\t was\t a\t prodigious\t trip,\t but\t delightful,\t of\t course,\t through\t the\t Rockies\t and the\tBlack\tHills\tand\tthe\tmighty\tsweep\tof\tthe\tGreat\tPlains\tto\tcivilization\tand\tthe Missouri\t border--where\t the\t railroading\t began\t and\t the\t delightfulness\t ended.\t But no\tone\tis\tthe\tworse\tfor\tthe\tjourney;\tcertainly\tnot\tCathy,\tnor\tDorcas,\tnor\tSoldier Boy;\tand\tas\tfor\tme,\tI\tam\tnot\tcomplaining. Spain\tis\tall\tthat\tCathy\thad\tpictured\tit--and\tmore,\tshe\tsays.\tShe\tis\tin\ta\tfury\tof delight,\t the\t maddest\t little\t animal\t that\t ever\t was,\t and\t all\t for\t joy.\t She\t thinks\t she remembers\tSpain,\tbut\tthat\tis\tnot\tvery\tlikely,\tI\tsuppose.\tThe\ttwo--Mercedes\tand Cathy--devour\t each\t other.\t It\t is\t a\t rapture\t of\t love,\t and\t beautiful\t to\t see.\t It\t is Spanish;\tthat\tdescribes\tit.\tWill\tthis\tbe\ta\tshort\tvisit? No.\tIt\twill\tbe\tpermanent.\tCathy\thas\telected\tto\tabide\twith\tSpain\tand\ther\taunt. Dorcas\tsays\tshe\t(Dorcas)\tforesaw\tthat\tthis\twould\thappen;\tand\talso\tsays\tthat\tshe wanted\t it\t to\t happen,\t and\t says\t the\t child's\t own\t country\t is\t the\t right\t place\t for\t her, and\t that\t she\t ought\t not\t to\t have\t been\t sent\t to\t me,\t I\t ought\t to\t have\t gone\t to\t her.\t I thought\t it\t insane\t to\t take\t Soldier\t Boy\t to\t Spain,\t but\t it\t was\t well\t that\t I\t yielded\t to Cathy's\t pleadings;\t if\t he\t had\t been\t left\t behind,\t half\t of\t her\t heart\t would\t have remained\twith\thim,\tand\tshe\twould\tnot\thave\tbeen\tcontented.\tAs\tit\tis,\teverything has\t fallen\t out\t for\t the\t best,\t and\t we\t are\t all\t satisfied\t and\t comfortable.\t It\t may\t be that\tDorcas\tand\tI\twill\tsee\tAmerica\tagain\tsome\tday;\tbut\talso\tit\tis\ta\tcase\tof\tmaybe not. We\t left\t the\t post\t in\t the\t early\t morning.\t It\t was\t an\t affecting\t time.\t The\t women cried\tover\tCathy,\tso\tdid\teven\tthose\tstern\twarriors\tthe\tRocky\tMountain\tRangers; Shekels\twas\tthere,\tand\tthe\tCid,\tand\tSardanapalus,\tand\tPotter,\tand\tMongrel,\tand Sour-Mash,\tFamine,\tand\tPestilence,\tand\tCathy\tkissed\tthem\tall\tand\twept;\tdetails of\t the\t several\t arms\t of\t the\t garrison\t were\t present\t to\t represent\t the\t rest,\t and\t say good-by\t and\t God\t bless\t you\t for\t all\t the\t soldiery;\t and\t there\t was\t a\t special\t squad from\t the\t Seventh,\t with\t the\t oldest\t veteran\t at\t its\t head,\t to\t speed\t the\t Seventh's Child\t with\t grand\t honors\t and\t impressive\t ceremonies;\t and\t the\t veteran\t had\t a","touching\tspeech\tby\theart,\tand\tput\tup\this\thand\tin\tsalute\tand\ttried\tto\tsay\tit,\tbut\this lips\t trembled\t and\t his\t voice\t broke,\t but\t Cathy\t bent\t down\t from\t the\t saddle\t and kissed\thim\ton\tthe\tmouth\tand\tturned\this\tdefeat\tto\tvictory,\tand\ta\tcheer\twent\tup. The\t next\t act\t closed\t the\t ceremonies,\t and\t was\t a\t moving\t surprise.\t It\t may\t be that\tyou\thave\tdiscovered,\tbefore\tthis,\tthat\tthe\trigors\tof\tmilitary\tlaw\tand\tcustom melt\tinsensibly\taway\tand\tdisappear\twhen\ta\tsoldier\tor\ta\tregiment\tor\tthe\tgarrison wants\t to\t do\t something\t that\t will\t please\t Cathy.\t The\t bands\t conceived\t the\t idea\t of stirring\t her\t soldierly\t heart\twith\ta\t farewell\t which\t would\tremain\tin\ther\tmemory always,\t beautiful\t and\t unfading,\t and\t bring\t back\t the\t past\t and\t its\t love\t for\t her whenever\tshe\tshould\tthink\tof\tit;\tso\tthey\tgot\ttheir\tproject\tplaced\tbefore\tGeneral Burnaby,\t my\t successor,\t who\t is\t Cathy's\t newest\t slave,\t and\t in\t spite\t of\t poverty\t of precedents\tthey\tgot\this\tpermission.\tThe\tbands\tknew\tthe\tchild's\tfavorite\tmilitary airs.\t By\t this\t hint\t you\t know\t what\t is\t coming,\t but\t Cathy\t didn't.\t She\t was\t asked\t to sound\tthe\t\\\"reveille,\\\"\twhich\tshe\tdid. REVEILLE With\tthe\tlast\tnote\tthe\tbands\tburst\tout\twith\ta\tcrash:\tand\twoke\tthe\tmountains with\t the\t \\\"Star-Spangled\t Banner\\\"\t in\t a\t way\t to\t make\t a\t body's\t heart\t swell\t and thump\t and\t his\t hair\t rise!\t It\t was\t enough\t to\t break\t a\t person\t all\t up,\t to\t see\t Cathy's radiant\tface\tshining\tout\tthrough\ther\tgladness\tand\ttears.\tBy\trequest\tshe\tblew\tthe \\\"assembly,\\\"\tnow.\t.\t.\t. THE\tASSEMBLY .\t.\t.\tThen\tthe\tbands\tthundered\tin,\twith\t\\\"Rally\tround\tthe\tflag,\tboys,\trally\tonce again!\\\"\tNext,\tshe\tblew\tanother\tcall\t(\\\"to\tthe\tStandard\\\")\t.\t.\t. TO\tTHE\tSTANDARD",".\t .\t .\t and\t the\t bands\t responded\t with\t \\\"When\t we\t were\t marching\t through Georgia.\\\"\t Straightway\t she\t sounded\t \\\"boots\t and\t saddles,\\\"\t that\t thrilling\t and\t most expediting\tcall.\t.\t.\t. BOOTS\tAND\tSADDLES .\t .\t .\t and\t the\t bands\t could\t hardly\t hold\t in\t for\t the\t final\t note;\t then\t they\t turned their\twhole\tstrength\tloose\ton\t\\\"Tramp,\ttramp,\ttramp,\tthe\tboys\tare\tmarching,\\\"\tand everybody's\texcitement\trose\tto\tblood-heat. Now\t an\t impressive\t pause--then\t the\t bugle\t sang\t \\\"Taps\\\"--translatable,\t this time,\tinto\t\\\"Good-by,\tand\tGod\tkeep\tus\tall!\\\"\tfor\ttaps\tis\tthe\tsoldier's\tnightly\trelease from\tduty,\tand\tfarewell:\tplaintive,\tsweet,\tpathetic,\tfor\tthe\tmorning\tis\tnever\tsure, for\thim;\talways\tit\tis\tpossible\tthat\the\tis\thearing\tit\tfor\tthe\tlast\ttime.\t.\t.\t. TAPS .\t.\t.\tThen\tthe\tbands\tturned\ttheir\tinstruments\ttowards\tCathy\tand\tburst\tin\twith that\t rollicking\t frenzy\t of\t a\t tune,\t \\\"Oh,\t we'll\t all\t get\t blind\t drunk\t when\t Johnny comes\t marching\t home--yes,\t we'll\t all\t get\t blind\t drunk\t when\t Johnny\t comes marching\t home!\\\"\t and\t followed\t it\t instantly\t with\t \\\"Dixie,\\\"\t that\t antidote\t for melancholy,\tmerriest\tand\tgladdest\tof\tall\tmilitary\tmusic\ton\tany\tside\tof\tthe\tocean- -and\tthat\twas\tthe\tend.\tAnd\tso--farewell! I\twish\tyou\tcould\thave\tbeen\tthere\tto\tsee\tit\tall,\thear\tit\tall,\tand\tfeel\tit:\tand\tget yourself\tblown\taway\twith\tthe\thurricane\thuzza\tthat\tswept\tthe\tplace\tas\ta\tfinish. When\twe\trode\taway,\tour\tmain\tbody\thad\talready\tbeen\ton\tthe\troad\tan\thour\tor","two--I\t speak\t of\t our\t camp\t equipage;\t but\t we\t didn't\t move\t off\t alone:\t when\t Cathy blew\t the\t \\\"advance\\\"\t the\t Rangers\t cantered\t out\t in\t column\t of\t fours,\t and\t gave\t us escort,\t and\t were\t joined\t by\t White\t Cloud\t and\t Thunder-Bird\t in\t all\t their\t gaudy bravery,\t and\t by\t Buffalo\t Bill\t and\t four\t subordinate\t scouts.\t Three\t miles\t away,\t in the\tPlains,\tthe\tLieutenant-General\thalted,\tsat\ther\thorse\tlike\ta\tmilitary\tstatue,\tthe bugle\t at\t her\t lips,\t and\t put\t the\t Rangers\t through\t the\t evolutions\t for\t half\t an\t hour; and\t finally,\t when\t she\t blew\t the\t \\\"charge,\\\"\t she\t led\t it\t herself.\t \\\"Not\t for\t the\t last time,\\\"\t she\t said,\t and\t got\t a\t cheer,\t and\t we\t said\t good-by\t all\t around,\t and\t faced eastward\tand\trode\taway. Postscript.\t A\t Day\t Later.\t Soldier\t Boy\t was\t stolen\t last\t night.\t Cathy\t is\t almost beside\therself,\tand\twe\tcannot\tcomfort\ther.\tMercedes\tand\tI\tare\tnot\tmuch\talarmed about\t the\t horse,\t although\t this\t part\t of\t Spain\t is\t in\t something\t of\t a\t turmoil, politically,\tat\tpresent,\tand\tthere\tis\ta\tgood\tdeal\tof\tlawlessness.\tIn\tordinary\ttimes the\tthief\tand\tthe\thorse\twould\tsoon\tbe\tcaptured.\tWe\tshall\thave\tthem\tbefore\tlong, I\tthink. 14\tSOLDIER\tBOY--TO\tHIMSELF It\tis\tfive\tmonths.\tOr\tis\tit\tsix?\tMy\ttroubles\thave\tclouded\tmy\tmemory.\tI\tthink I\t have\t been\t all\t over\t this\t land,\t from\t end\t to\t end,\t and\t now\t I\t am\t back\t again\t since day\t before\t yesterday,\t to\t that\t city\t which\t we\t passed\t through,\t that\t last\t day\t of\t our long\tjourney,\tand\twhich\tis\tnear\ther\tcountry\thome.\tI\tam\ta\ttottering\truin\tand\tmy eyes\t are\t dim,\t but\t I\t recognized\t it.\t If\t she\t could\t see\t me\t she\t would\t know\t me\t and sound\t my\t call.\t I\t wish\t I\t could\t hear\t it\t once\t more;\t it\t would\t revive\t me,\t it\t would bring\t back\t her\t face\t and\t the\t mountains\t and\t the\t free\t life,\t and\t I\t would\t come--if\t I were\t dying\t I\t would\t come!\t She\t would\t not\t know\t me,\t looking\t as\t I\t do,\t but\t she would\tknow\tme\tby\tmy\tstar.\tBut\tshe\twill\tnever\tsee\tme,\tfor\tthey\tdo\tnot\tlet\tme\tout of\t this\t shabby\t stable--a\t foul\t and\t miserable\t place,\t with\t most\t two\t wrecks\t like myself\tfor\tcompany. How\t many\t times\t have\t I\t changed\t hands?\t I\t think\t it\t is\t twelve\t times--I\t cannot remember;\tand\teach\ttime\tit\twas\tdown\ta\tstep\tlower,\tand\teach\ttime\tI\tgot\ta\tharder master.\tThey\thave\tbeen\tcruel,\tevery\tone;\tthey\thave\tworked\tme\tnight\tand\tday\tin degraded\temployments,\tand\tbeaten\tme;\tthey\thave\tfed\tme\till\tand\tsome\tdays\tnot at\t all.\t And\t so\t I\t am\t but\t bones,\t now,\t with\t a\t rough\t and\t frowsy\t skin\t humped\t and cornered\tupon\tmy\tshrunken\tbody--that\tskin\twhich\twas\tonce\tso\tglossy,\tthat\tskin","which\t she\t loved\t to\t stroke\t with\t her\t hand.\t I\t was\t the\t pride\t of\t the\t mountains\t and the\tGreat\tPlains;\tnow\tI\tam\ta\tscare-crow\tand\tdespised.\tThese\tpiteous\twrecks\tthat are\t my\t comrades\t here\t say\t we\t have\t reached\t the\t bottom\t of\t the\t scale,\t the\t final humiliation;\t they\t say\t that\t when\t a\t horse\t is\t no\t longer\t worth\t the\t weeds\t and discarded\t rubbish\t they\t feed\t to\t him,\t they\t sell\t him\t to\t the\t bull-ring\t for\t a\t glass\t of brandy,\tto\tmake\tsport\tfor\tthe\tpeople\tand\tperish\tfor\ttheir\tpleasure. To\tdie--that\tdoes\tnot\tdisturb\tme;\twe\tof\tthe\tservice\tnever\tcare\tfor\tdeath.\tBut if\tI\tcould\tsee\ther\tonce\tmore!\tif\tI\tcould\thear\ther\tbugle\tsing\tagain\tand\tsay,\t\\\"It\tis\tI, Soldier--come!\\\" 15\tGENERAL\tALISON\tTO\tMRS.\tDRAKE, THE\tCOLONEL'S\tWIFE To\treturn,\tnow,\tto\t where\tI\twas,\t and\ttell\t you\tthe\trest.\tWe\tshall\tnever\tknow how\t she\t came\t to\t be\t there;\t there\t is\t no\t way\t to\t account\t for\t it.\t She\t was\t always watching\tfor\tblack\tand\tshiny\tand\tspirited\thorses--watching,\thoping,\tdespairing, hoping\t again;\t always\t giving\t chase\t and\t sounding\t her\t call,\t upon\t the\t meagerest chance\t of\t a\t response,\t and\t breaking\t her\t heart\t over\t the\t disappointment;\t always inquiring,\talways\tinterested\tin\tsales-stables\tand\thorse\taccumulations\tin\tgeneral. How\tshe\tgot\tthere\tmust\tremain\ta\tmystery. At\t the\t point\t which\t I\t had\t reached\t in\t a\t preceding\t paragraph\t of\t this\t account, the\t situation\t was\t as\t follows:\t two\t horses\t lay\t dying;\t the\t bull\t had\t scattered\t his persecutors\tfor\tthe\tmoment,\tand\tstood\traging,\tpanting,\tpawing\tthe\tdust\tin\tclouds over\t his\t back,\t when\t the\t man\t that\t had\t been\t wounded\t returned\t to\t the\t ring\t on\t a remount,\t a\t poor\t blindfolded\t wreck\t that\t yet\t had\t something,\t ironically\t military about\t his\t bearing--and\t the\t next\t moment\t the\t bull\t had\t ripped\t him\t open\t and\t his bowels\t were\t dragging\t upon\t the\t ground\t and\t the\t bull\t was\t charging\t his\t swarm\t of pests\tagain.\tThen\tcame\tpealing\tthrough\tthe\tair\ta\tbugle-call\tthat\tfroze\tmy\tblood-- \\\"It\t is\t I,\t Soldier--come!\\\"\t I\t turned;\t Cathy\t was\t flying\t down\t through\t the\t massed people;\tshe\tcleared\tthe\tparapet\tat\ta\tbound,\tand\tsped\ttowards\tthat\triderless\thorse, who\tstaggered\tforward\ttowards\t the\tremembered\tsound;\tbut\this\tstrength\tfailed, and\t he\t fell\t at\t her\t feet,\t she\t lavishing\t kisses\t upon\t him\t and\t sobbing,\t the\t house rising\twith\tone\timpulse,\tand\twhite\twith\thorror!\tBefore\thelp\tcould\treach\ther\tthe bull\twas\tback\tagain-- She\t was\t never\t conscious\t again\t in\t life.\t We\t bore\t her\t home,\t all\t mangled\t and drenched\t in\t blood,\t and\t knelt\t by\t her\t and\t listened\t to\t her\t broken\t and\t wandering words,\tand\tprayed\tfor\ther\tpassing\tspirit,\tand\tthere\twas\tno\tcomfort--nor\tever\twill be,\t I\t think.\t But\t she\t was\t happy,\t for\t she\t was\t far\t away\t under\t another\t sky,\t and","comrading\t again\t with\t her\t Rangers,\t and\t her\t animal\t friends,\t and\t the\t soldiers. Their\t names\t fell\t softly\t and\t caressingly\t from\t her\t lips,\t one\t by\t one,\t with\t pauses between.\tShe\twas\tnot\tin\tpain,\tbut\tlay\twith\tclosed\teyes,\tvacantly\tmurmuring,\tas one\t who\t dreams.\t Sometimes\t she\t smiled,\t saying\t nothing;\t sometimes\t she\t smiled when\tshe\tuttered\ta\tname--such\tas\tShekels,\tor\tBB,\tor\tPotter.\tSometimes\tshe\twas at\t her\t fort,\t issuing\t commands;\t sometimes\t she\t was\t careering\t over\t the\t plains\t at the\t head\t of\t her\t men;\t sometimes\t she\t was\t training\t her\t horse;\t once\t she\t said, reprovingly,\t \\\"You\t are\t giving\t me\t the\t wrong\t foot;\t give\t me\t the\t left--don't\t you know\tit\tis\tgood-by?\\\" After\t this,\t she\t lay\t silent\t some\t time;\t the\t end\t was\t near.\t By\t and\t by\t she murmured,\t\\\"Tired\t.\t.\t.\tsleepy\t.\t.\t.\ttake\tCathy,\tmamma.\\\"\tThen\t\\\"Kiss\tme,\tSoldier.\\\" For\ta\tlittle\ttime\tshe\tlay\tso\tstill\tthat\twe\twere\tdoubtful\tif\tshe\tbreathed.\tThen\tshe put\t out\t her\t hand\t and\t began\t to\t feel\t gropingly\t about;\t then\t said,\t \\\"I\t cannot\t find\t it; blow\t'Taps.'\\\"*10\tIt\twas\tthe\tend. TAPS 1906","HUNTING\tTHE\tDECEITFUL\tTURKEY WHEN\t I\t was\t a\t boy\t my\t uncle\t and\t his\t big\t boys\t hunted\t with\t the\t rifle,\t the youngest\tboy\tFred\tand\tI\twith\ta\tshotgun--a\tsmall\tsingle-barrelled\tshotgun\twhich was\t properly\t suited\t to\t our\t size\t and\t strength;\t it\t was\t not\t much\t heavier\t than\t a broom.\t We\t carried\t it\t turn\t about,\t half\t an\t hour\t at\t a\t time.\t I\t was\t not\t able\t to\t hit anything\t with\t it,\t but\t I\t liked\t to\t try.\t Fred\t and\t I\t hunted\t feathered\t small\t game,\t the others\thunted\tdeer,\tsquirrels,\twild\tturkeys,\tand\tsuch\tthings.\tMy\tuncle\tand\tthe\tbig boys\t were\t good\t shots.\t They\t killed\t hawks\t and\t wild\t geese\t and\t such\t like\t on\t the wing;\tand\tthey\tdidn't\twound\tor\tkill\tsquirrels,\tthey\tstunned\tthem.\tWhen\tthe\tdogs treed\t a\t squirrel,\t the\t squirrel\t would\t scamper\t aloft\t and\t run\t out\t on\t a\t limb\t and flatten\t himself\t along\t it,\t hoping\t to\t make\t himself\t invisible\t in\t that\t way--and\t not quite\tsucceeding.\tYou\tcould\tsee\this\twee\tlittle\tears\tsticking\tup.\tYou\tcouldn't\tsee his\tnose,\tbut\tyou\tknew\twhere\tit\twas.\tThen\tthe\thunter,\tdespising\ta\t\\\"rest\\\"\tfor\this rifle,\t stood\t up\t and\t took\t offhand\t aim\t at\t the\t limb\t and\t sent\t a\t bullet\t into\t it immediately\tunder\tthe\tsquirrel's\tnose,\tand\tdown\ttumbled\tthe\tanimal,\tunwounded but\tunconscious;\tthe\tdogs\tgave\thim\ta\tshake\tand\the\twas\tdead.\tSometimes\twhen the\tdistance\twas\tgreat\tand\tthe\twind\tnot\taccurately\tallowed\tfor,\tthe\tbullet\twould hit\t the\t squirrel's\t head;\t the\t dogs\t could\t do\t as\t they\t pleased\t with\t that\t one--the hunter's\tpride\twas\thurt,\tand\the\twouldn't\tallow\tit\tto\tgo\tinto\tthe\tgamebag. In\tthe\tfirst\tfaint\tgray\tof\tthe\tdawn\tthe\tstately\twild\tturkeys\twould\tbe\tstalking around\tin\tgreat\tflocks,\tand\tready\tto\tbe\tsociable\tand\tanswer\tinvitations\tto\tcome and\t converse\t with\t other\t excursionists\t of\t their\t kind.\t The\t hunter\t concealed himself\tand\timitated\tthe\tturkey-call\tby\tsucking\tthe\tair\tthrough\tthe\tlegbone\tof\ta turkey\t which\t had\t previously\t answered\t a\t call\t like\t that\t and\t lived\t only\t just\t long enough\t to\t regret\t it.\t There\t is\t nothing\t that\t furnishes\t a\t perfect\t turkey-call\t except that\tbone.\tAnother\tof\tNature's\ttreacheries,\tyou\tsee.\tShe\tis\tfull\tof\tthem;\thalf\tthe time\t she\t doesn't\t know\t which\t she\t likes\t best--to\t betray\t her\t child\t or\t protect\t it.\t In the\t case\t of\t the\t turkey\t she\t is\t badly\t mixed:\t she\t gives\t it\t a\t bone\t to\t be\t used\t in getting\tit\tinto\ttrouble,\tand\tshe\talso\tfurnishes\tit\twith\ta\ttrick\tfor\tgetting\titself\tout of\tthe\ttrouble\tagain.\tWhen\ta\tmamma-turkey\tanswers\tan\tinvitation\tand\tfinds\tshe has\t made\t a\t mistake\t in\t accepting\t it,\t she\t does\t as\t the\t mamma-partridge\t does-- remembers\t a\t previous\t engagement\t and\t goes\t limping\t and\t scrambling\t away, pretending\tto\tbe\tvery\tlame;\tand\tat\tthe\tsame\ttime\tshe\tis\tsaying\tto\ther\tnot-visible children,\t\\\"Lie\tlow,\tkeep\tstill,\tdon't\texpose\tyourselves;\tI\tshall\tbe\tback\tas\tsoon\tas I\thave\tbeguiled\tthis\tshabby\tswindler\tout\tof\tthe\tcountry.\\\" When\t a\t person\t is\t ignorant\t and\t confiding,\t this\t immoral\t device\t can\t have","tiresome\tresults.\tI\tfollowed\tan\tostensibly\tlame\tturkey\tover\ta\tconsiderable\tpart\tof the\tUnited\tStates\tone\tmorning,\tbecause\tI\tbelieved\tin\ther\tand\tcould\tnot\tthink\tshe would\t deceive\t a\t mere\t boy,\t and\t one\t who\t was\t trusting\t her\t and\t considering\t her honest.\tI\thad\tthe\tsingle-barrelled\tshotgun,\tbut\tmy\tidea\twas\tto\tcatch\ther\talive.\tI often\tgot\twithin\trushing\tdistance\tof\ther,\tand\tthen\tmade\tmy\trush;\tbut\talways,\tjust as\t I\t made\t my\t final\t plunge\t and\t put\t my\t hand\t down\t where\t her\t back\t had\t been,\t it wasn't\t there;\t it\t was\t only\t two\t or\t three\t inches\t from\t there\t and\t I\t brushed\t the\t tail- feathers\t as\t I\t landed\t on\t my\t stomach--a\t very\t close\t call,\t but\t still\t not\t quite\t close enough;\tthat\tis,\tnot\tclose\tenough\tfor\tsuccess,\tbut\tjust\tclose\tenough\tto\tconvince me\t that\t I\t could\t do\t it\t next\t time.\t She\t always\t waited\t for\t me,\t a\t little\t piece\t away, and\t let\t on\t to\t be\t resting\t and\t greatly\t fatigued;\t which\t was\t a\t lie,\t but\t I\t believed\t it, for\t I\t still\t thought\t her\t honest\t long\t after\t I\t ought\t to\t have\t begun\t to\t doubt\t her, suspecting\tthat\tthis\twas\tno\tway\tfor\ta\thigh-minded\tbird\tto\tbe\tacting.\tI\tfollowed, and\t followed,\t and\t followed,\t making\t my\t periodical\t rushes,\t and\t getting\t up\t and brushing\tthe\tdust\toff,\tand\tresuming\tthe\tvoyage\twith\tpatient\tconfidence;\tindeed, with\t a\t confidence\t which\t grew,\t for\t I\t could\t see\t by\t the\t change\t of\t climate\t and vegetation\t that\t we\t were\t getting\t up\t into\t the\t high\t latitudes,\t and\t as\t she\t always looked\ta\tlittle\ttireder\tand\ta\tlittle\tmore\tdiscouraged\tafter\teach\trush,\tI\tjudged\tthat\tI was\t safe\t to\t win,\t in\t the\t end,\t the\t competition\t being\t purely\t a\t matter\t of\t staying power\tand\tthe\tadvantage\tlying\twith\tme\tfrom\tthe\tstart\tbecause\tshe\twas\tlame. Along\tin\tthe\tafternoon\tI\tbegan\tto\tfeel\tfatigued\tmyself.\tNeither\tof\tus\thad\thad any\trest\tsince\twe\tfirst\tstarted\ton\tthe\texcursion,\twhich\twas\tupwards\tof\tten\thours before,\t though\t latterly\t we\t had\t paused\t awhile\t after\t rushes,\t I\t letting\t on\t to\t be thinking\tabout\tsomething\telse;\tbut\tneither\tof\tus\tsincere,\tand\tboth\tof\tus\twaiting for\t the\t other\t to\t call\t game\t but\t in\t no\t real\t hurry\t about\t it,\t for\t indeed\t those\t little evanescent\tsnatches\tof\trest\twere\tvery\tgrateful\tto\tthe\tfeelings\tof\tus\tboth;\tit\twould naturally\tbe\tso,\tskirmishing\talong\tlike\tthat\tever\tsince\tdawn\tand\tnot\ta\tbite\tin\tthe meantime;\t at\t least\t for\t me,\t though\t sometimes\t as\t she\t lay\t on\t her\t side\t fanning herself\t with\t a\t wing\t and\t praying\t for\t strength\t to\t get\t out\t of\t this\t difficulty\t a grasshopper\t happened\t along\t whose\t time\t had\t come,\t and\t that\t was\t well\t for\t her, and\tfortunate,\tbut\tI\thad\tnothing--nothing\tthe\twhole\tday. More\t than\t once,\t after\t I\t was\t very\t tired,\t I\t gave\t up\t taking\t her\t alive,\t and\t was going\t to\t shoot\t her,\t but\t I\t never\t did\t it,\t although\t it\t was\t my\t right,\t for\t I\t did\t not believe\tI\tcould\thit\ther;\tand\tbesides,\tshe\talways\tstopped\tand\tposed,\twhen\tI\traised the\t gun,\t and\t this\t made\t me\t suspicious\t that\t she\t knew\t about\t me\t and\t my marksmanship,\tand\tso\tI\tdid\tnot\tcare\tto\texpose\tmyself\tto\tremarks. I\tdid\tnot\tget\ther,\tat\tall.\tWhen\tshe\tgot\ttired\tof\tthe\tgame\tat\tlast,\tshe\trose\tfrom","almost\tunder\tmy\thand\tand\tflew\taloft\twith\tthe\trush\tand\twhir\tof\ta\tshell\tand\tlit\ton the\t highest\t limb\t of\t a\t great\t tree\t and\t sat\t down\t and\t crossed\t her\t legs\t and\t smiled down\tat\tme,\tand\tseemed\tgratified\tto\tsee\tme\tso\tastonished. I\twas\tashamed,\tand\talso\tlost;\tand\tit\twas\twhile\twandering\tthe\twoods\thunting for\tmyself\tthat\tI\tfound\ta\tdeserted\tlog\tcabin\tand\thad\tone\tof\tthe\tbest\tmeals\tthere that\t in\t my\t life-days\t I\t have\t eaten.\t The\t weed-grown\t garden\t was\t full\t of\t ripe tomatoes,\tand\tI\tate\tthem\travenously,\tthough\tI\thad\tnever\tliked\tthem\tbefore.\tNot more\t than\t two\t or\t three\t times\t since\t have\t I\t tasted\t anything\t that\t was\t so\t delicious as\t those\t tomatoes.\t I\t surfeited\t myself\t with\t them,\t and\t did\t not\t taste\t another\t one until\tI\twas\tin\tmiddle\tlife.\tI\tcan\teat\tthem\tnow,\tbut\tI\tdo\tnot\tlike\tthe\tlook\tof\tthem.\tI suppose\twe\thave\tall\texperienced\ta\tsurfeit\tat\tone\ttime\tor\tanother.\tOnce,\tin\tstress of\t circumstances,\t I\t ate\t part\t of\t a\t barrel\t of\t sardines,\t there\t being\t nothing\t else\t at hand,\tbut\tsince\tthen\tI\thave\talways\tbeen\table\tto\tget\talong\twithout\tsardines. 1906","EXTRACT\tFROM\tCAPTAIN\tSTORMFIELD'S VISIT\tTO\tHEAVEN 1 WELL,\t WHEN\t I\t had\t been\t dead\t about\t thirty\t years,\t I\t begun\t to\t get\t a\t little anxious.\t Mind\t you,\t I\t had\t been\t whizzing\t through\t space\t all\t that\t time,\t like\t a comet.\tLike\t a\t comet!\t Why,\t Peters,\t I\t laid\t over\t the\t lot\t of\t them!\t Of\t course\t there warn't\t any\t of\t them\t going\t my\t way,\t as\t a\t steady\t thing,\t you\t know,\t because\t they travel\tin\ta\tlong\tcircle\tlike\tthe\tloop\tof\ta\tlasso,\twhereas\tI\twas\tpointed\tas\tstraight as\t a\t dart\t for\t the\t Hereafter;\t but\t I\t happened\t on\t one\t every\t now\t and\t then\t that\t was going\tmy\tway\tfor\tan\thour\tor\tso,\tand\tthen\twe\thad\ta\tbit\tof\ta\tbrush\ttogether.\tBut\tit was\tgenerally\tpretty\tone-sided,\tbecause\tI\tsailed\tby\tthem\tthe\tsame\tas\tif\tthey\twere standing\t still.\t An\t ordinary\t comet\t don't\t make\t more\t than\t about\t 200,000\t miles\t a minute.\tOf\tcourse\twhen\tI\tcame\tacross\tone\tof\tthat\tsort--like\tEncke's\tand\tHaley's comets,\t for\t instance--it\t warn't\t anything\t but\t just\t a\t flash\t and\t a\t vanish,\t you\t see. You\tcouldn't\trightly\tcall\tit\ta\trace.\tIt\twas\tas\tif\tthe\tcomet\twas\ta\tgravel-train\tand\tI was\t a\t telegraph\tdespatch.\tBut\t after\tI\tgot\toutside\tof\tour\tastronomical\tsystem,\tI used\t to\t flush\t a\t comet\t occasionally\t that\t was\t something\t like.\t We\t haven't\t got\t any such\tcomets--ours\tdon't\tbegin.\tOne\tnight\tI\twas\tswinging\talong\tat\ta\tgood\tround gait,\t everything\t taut\t and\t trim,\t and\t the\t wind\t in\t my\t favor--I\t judged\t I\t was\t going about\t a\t million\t miles\t a\t minute--it\t might\t have\t been\t more,\t it\t couldn't\t have\t been less--when\t I\t flushed\t a\t most\t uncommonly\t big\t one\t about\t three\t points\t off\t my starboard\tbow.\tBy\this\tstern\tlights\tI\tjudged\the\twas\tbearing\tabout\tnortheast-and- by-north-half-east.\tWell,\tit\twas\tso\tnear\tmy\tcourse\tthat\tI\twouldn't\tthrow\taway\tthe chance;\t so\t I\t fell\t off\t a\t point,\t steadied\t my\t helm,\t and\t went\t for\t him.\t You\t should have\theard\tme\twhiz;\tand\tseen\tthe\telectric\tfur\tfly!\tIn\tabout\ta\tminute\tand\ta\thalf\tI was\tfringed\tout\twith\tan\telectrical\tnimbus\tthat\tflamed\taround\tfor\tmiles\tand\tmiles and\tlit\tup\tall\tspace\tlike\tbroad\tday.\tThe\tcomet\twas\tburning\tblue\tin\tthe\tdistance, like\t a\t sickly\t torch,\t when\t I\t first\t sighted\t him,\t but\t he\t begun\t to\t grow\t bigger\t and bigger\t as\t I\t crept\t up\t on\t him.\t I\t slipped\t up\t on\t him\t so\t fast\t that\t when\t I\t had\t gone about\t 150,000,000\t miles\t I\t was\t close\t enough\t to\t be\t swallowed\t up\t in\t the phosphorescent\t glory\t of\t his\t wake,\t and\t I\t couldn't\t see\t anything\t for\t the\t glare. Thinks\tI,\tit\twon't\tdo\tto\trun\tinto\thim,\tso\tI\tshunted\tto\tone\tside\tand\ttore\talong.\tBy","and\tby\tI\tclosed\tup\tabreast\tof\this\ttail.\tDo\tyou\tknow\twhat\tit\twas\tlike?\tIt\twas\tlike\ta gnat\t closing\t up\t on\t the\t continent\t of\t America.\t I\t forged\t along.\t By\t and\t by\t I\t had sailed\t along\t his\t coast\t for\t a\t little\t upwards\t of\t a\t hundred\t and\t fifty\t million\t miles, and\t then\t I\t could\t see\t by\t the\t shape\t of\t him\t that\t I\t hadn't\t even\t got\t up\t to\t his waistband\tyet.\tWhy,\tPeters,\twe\tdon't\tknow\tanything\tabout\tcomets,\tdown\there.\tIf you\t want\t to\t see\t comets\t that\t are\t comets,\t you've\t got\t to\t go\t outside\t of\t our\t solar system--where\t there's\t room\t for\t them,\t you\t understand.\t My\t friend,\t I've\t seen comets\t out\t there\t that\t couldn't\t even\t lay\t down\t inside\t the\t orbits\t of\t our\t noblest comets\twithout\ttheir\ttails\thanging\tover. Well,\t I\t boomed\t along\t another\t hundred\t and\t fifty\t million\t miles,\t and\t got\t up abreast\this\tshoulder,\tas\tyou\tmay\tsay.\tI\twas\tfeeling\tpretty\tfine,\tI\ttell\tyou;\tbut\tjust then\tI\tnoticed\tthe\tofficer\tof\tthe\tdeck\tcome\tto\tthe\tside\tand\thoist\this\tglass\tin\tmy direction.\tStraight\toff\tI\theard\thim\tsing\tout-- \\\"Below\tthere,\tahoy!\tShake\ther\tup,\tshake\ther\tup!\tHeave\ton\ta\thundred\tmillion billion\ttons\tof\tbrimstone!\\\" \\\"Ay--ay,\tsir!\\\" \\\"Pipe\tthe\tstarboard\twatch!\tAll\thands\ton\tdeck!\\\" \\\"Ay--ay,\tsir!\\\" \\\"Send\ttwo\thundred\tthousand\tmillion\tmen\taloft\tto\tshake\tout\troyals\tand\tsky- scrapers!\\\" \\\"Ay--ay,\tsir!\\\" \\\"Hand\t the\t stuns'ls!\t Hang\t out\t every\t rag\t you've\t got!\t Clothe\t her\t from\t stem\t to rudder-post!\\\" \\\"Ay--ay,\tsir!\\\" In\tabout\ta\tsecond\tI\tbegun\tto\tsee\tI'd\twoke\tup\ta\tpretty\tugly\tcustomer,\tPeters. In\tless\tthan\tten\tseconds\tthat\tcomet\twas\tjust\ta\tblazing\tcloud\tof\tred-hot\tcanvas.\tIt was\t piled\t up\t into\t the\t heavens\t clean\t out\t of\t sight--the\t old\t thing\t seemed\t to\t swell out\tand\toccupy\tall\tspace;\tthe\tsulphur\tsmoke\tfrom\tthe\tfurnaces--oh,\twell,\tnobody can\tdescribe\tthe\tway\tit\trolled\tand\ttumbled\tup\tinto\tthe\tskies,\tand\tnobody\tcan\thalf describe\t the\t way\t it\t smelt.\t Neither\t can\t anybody\t begin\t to\t describe\t the\t way\t that monstrous\tcraft\tbegun\tto\tcrash\talong.\tAnd\tsuch\tanother\tpowwow--thousands\tof bo's'n's\twhistles\tscreaming\tat\tonce,\tand\ta\tcrew\tlike\tthe\tpopulations\tof\ta\thundred thousand\tworlds\tlike\tours\tall\tswearing\tat\tonce.\tWell,\tI\tnever\theard\tthe\tlike\tof\tit before. We\t roared\t and\t thundered\t along\t side\t by\t side,\t both\t doing\t our\t level\t best, because\t I'd\t never\t struck\t a\t comet\t before\t that\t could\t lay\t over\t me,\t and\t so\t I\t was bound\t to\t beat\t this\t one\t or\t break\t something.\t I\t judged\t I\t had\t some\t reputation\t in","space,\tand\tI\tcalculated\tto\tkeep\tit.\tI\tnoticed\tI\twasn't\tgaining\tas\tfast,\tnow,\tas\tI\twas before,\t but\t still\t I\t was\t gaining.\t There\t was\t a\t power\t of\t excitement\t on\t board\t the comet.\t Upwards\t of\t a\t hundred\t billion\t passengers\t swarmed\t up\t from\t below\t and rushed\tto\tthe\tside\tand\tbegun\tto\tbet\ton\tthe\trace.\tOf\tcourse\tthis\tcareened\ther\tand damaged\ther\tspeed.\tMy,\tbut\twasn't\tthe\tmate\tmad!\tHe\tjumped\tat\tthat\tcrowd,\twith his\ttrumpet\tin\this\thand,\tand\tsung\tout-- \\\"Amidships!\tamidships,\tyou----!11\tor\tI'll\tbrain\tthe\tlast\tidiot\tof\tyou!\\\" Well,\t sir,\t I\t gained\t and\t gained,\t little\t by\t little,\t till\t at\t last\t I\t went\t skimming sweetly\t by\t the\t magnificent\t old\t conflagration's\t nose.\t By\t this\t time\t the\t captain\t of the\tcomet\thad\tbeen\trousted\tout,\tand\the\tstood\tthere\tin\tthe\tred\tglare\tfor'ard,\tby\tthe mate,\t in\t his\t shirtsleeves\t and\t slippers,\t his\t hair\t all\t rats'\t nests\t and\t one\t suspender hanging,\t and\t how\t sick\t those\t two\t men\t did\t look!\t I\t just\t simply\t couldn't\t help putting\tmy\tthumb\tto\tmy\tnose\tas\tI\tglided\taway\tand\tsinging\tout: \\\"Ta-ta!\tta-ta!\tAny\tword\tto\tsend\tto\tyour\tfamily?\\\" Peters,\t it\t was\t a\t mistake.\t Yes,\t sir,\t I've\t often\t regretted\t that--it\t was\t a\t mistake. You\t see,\t the\t captain\t had\t given\t up\t the\t race,\t but\t that\t remark\t was\t too\t tedious\t for him--he\tcouldn't\tstand\tit.\tHe\tturned\tto\tthe\tmate,\tand\tsays\the-- \\\"Have\twe\tgot\tbrimstone\tenough\tof\tour\town\tto\tmake\tthe\ttrip?\\\" \\\"Yes,\tsir.\\\" \\\"Sure?\\\" \\\"Yes,\tsir--more\tthan\tenough.\\\" \\\"How\tmuch\thave\twe\tgot\tin\tcargo\tfor\tSatan?\\\" \\\"Eighteen\thundred\tthousand\tbillion\tquintillions\tof\tkazarks.\\\" \\\"Very\t well,\t then,\t let\t his\t boarders\t freeze\t till\t the\t next\t comet\t comes.\t Lighten ship!\tLively,\tnow,\tlively,\tmen!\tHeave\tthe\twhole\tcargo\toverboard!\\\" Peters,\tlook\tme\tin\tthe\teye,\tand\tbe\tcalm.\tI\tfound\tout,\tover\tthere,\tthat\ta\tkazark is\t exactly\t the\t bulk\t of\t a\t hundred\t and\t sixty-nine\t worlds\t like\t ours!\t They\t hove\t all that\tload\toverboard.\tWhen\tit\tfell\tit\twiped\tout\ta\tconsiderable\traft\tof\tstars\tjust\tas clean\tas\tif\tthey'd\tbeen\tcandles\tand\tsomebody\tblowed\tthem\tout.\tAs\tfor\tthe\trace, that\twas\tat\tan\tend.\tThe\tminute\tshe\twas\tlightened\tthe\tcomet\tswung\talong\tby\tme the\tsame\tas\tif\tI\twas\tanchored.\tThe\tcaptain\tstood\ton\tthe\tstern,\tby\tthe\tafter-davits, and\tput\this\tthumb\tto\this\tnose\tand\tsung\tout-- \\\"Ta-ta!\t ta-ta!\t Maybe\t you've\t got\t some\t message\t to\t send\t your\t friends\t in\t the Everlasting\tTropics!\\\" Then\the\thove\tup\this\tother\tsuspender\tand\tstarted\tfor'ard,\tand\tinside\tof\tthree- quarters\t of\t an\t hour\t his\t craft\t was\t only\t a\t pale\t torch\t again\t in\t the\t distance.\t Yes,\t it was\ta\tmistake,\tPeters--that\tremark\tof\tmine.\tI\tdon't\treckon\tI'll\tever\tget\tover\tbeing","sorry\tabout\tit.\tI'd\t'a'\tbeat\tthe\tbully\tof\tthe\tfirmament\tif\tI'd\tkept\tmy\tmouth\tshut. \t But\tI've\twandered\ta\tlittle\toff\tthe\ttrack\tof\tmy\ttale;\tI'll\tget\tback\ton\tmy\tcourse again.\tNow\tyou\tsee\twhat\tkind\tof\tspeed\tI\twas\tmaking.\tSo,\tas\tI\tsaid,\twhen\tI\thad been\ttearing\talong\tthis\tway\tabout\tthirty\tyears\tI\tbegun\tto\tget\tuneasy.\tOh,\tit\twas pleasant\tenough,\twith\ta\tgood\tdeal\tto\tfind\tout,\tbut\tthen\tit\twas\tkind\tof\tlonesome, you\tknow.\tBesides,\tI\twanted\tto\tget\tsomewhere.\tI\thadn't\tshipped\twith\tthe\tidea\tof cruising\tforever.\tFirst\toff,\tI\tliked\tthe\tdelay,\tbecause\tI\tjudged\tI\twas\tgoing\tto\tfetch up\t in\t pretty\t warm\t quarters\t when\t I\t got\t through;\t but\t towards\t the\t last\t I\t begun\t to feel\tthat\tI'd\trather\tgo\tto--well,\tmost\tany\tplace,\tso\tas\tto\tfinish\tup\tthe\tuncertainty. Well,\tone\tnight--it\twas\talways\tnight,\texcept\twhen\tI\twas\trushing\tby\tsome\tstar that\t was\t occupying\t the\t whole\t universe\t with\t its\t fire\t and\t its\t glare--light\t enough then,\t of\t course,\t but\t I\t necessarily\t left\t it\t behind\t in\t a\t minute\t or\t two\t and\t plunged into\ta\tsolid\tweek\tof\tdarkness\tagain.\tThe\tstars\tain't\tso\tclose\ttogether\tas\tthey\tlook to\tbe.\tWhere\twas\tI?\tOh\tyes;\tone\tnight\tI\twas\tsailing\talong,\twhen\tI\tdiscovered\ta tremendous\t long\t row\t of\t blinking\t lights\t away\t on\t the\t horizon\t ahead.\t As\t I approached,\tthey\tbegun\tto\ttower\tand\tswell\tand\tlook\tlike\tmighty\tfurnaces.\tSays\tI to\tmyself-- \\\"By\tGeorge,\tI've\tarrived\tat\tlast--and\tat\tthe\twrong\tplace,\tjust\tas\tI\texpected!\\\" Then\tI\tfainted.\tI\tdon't\tknow\thow\tlong\tI\twas\tinsensible,\tbut\tit\tmust\thave\tbeen a\tgood\twhile,\tfor,\twhen\tI\tcame\tto,\tthe\tdarkness\twas\tall\tgone\tand\tthere\twas\tthe loveliest\t sunshine\t and\t the\t balmiest,\t fragrantest\t air\t in\t its\t place.\t And\t there\t was such\t a\t marvelous\t world\t spread\t out\t before\t me--such\t a\t glowing,\t beautiful, bewitching\tcountry.\tThe\tthings\tI\ttook\tfor\tfurnaces\twere\tgates,\tmiles\thigh,\tmade all\tof\tflashing\tjewels,\tand\tthey\tpierced\ta\twall\tof\tsolid\tgold\tthat\tyou\tcouldn't\tsee the\ttop\tof,\tnor\tyet\tthe\tend\tof,\tin\teither\tdirection.\tI\twas\tpointed\tstraight\tfor\tone\tof these\t gates,\t and\t a-coming\t like\t a\t house\t afire.\t Now\t I\t noticed\t that\t the\t skies\t were black\t with\t millions\t of\t people,\t pointed\t for\t those\t gates.\t What\t a\t roar\t they\t made, rushing\t through\t the\t air!\t The\t ground\t was\t as\t thick\t as\t ants\t with\t people,\t too-- billions\tof\tthem,\tI\tjudge. I\tlit.\tI\tdrifted\tup\tto\ta\tgate\twith\ta\tswarm\tof\tpeople,\tand\twhen\tit\twas\tmy\tturn the\thead\tclerk\tsays,\tin\ta\tbusinesslike\tway-- \\\"Well,\tquick!\tWhere\tare\tyou\tfrom?\\\" \\\"San\tFrancisco,\\\"\tsays\tI. \\\"San\tFran--what?\\\"\tsays\the.","\\\"San\tFrancisco.\\\" He\tscratched\this\thead\tand\tlooked\tpuzzled,\tthen\the\tsays-- \\\"Is\tit\ta\tplanet?\\\" By\t George,\t Peters,\t think\t of\t it!\t \\\"Planet?\\\"\t says\t I;\t \\\"it's\t a\t city.\t And\t moreover, it's\tone\tof\tthe\tbiggest\tand\tfinest\tand--\\\" \\\"There,\t there!\\\"\t says\t he,\t \\\"no\t time\t here\t for\t conversation.\t We\t don't\t deal\t in cities\there.\tWhere\tare\tyou\tfrom\tin\ta\tgeneral\tway?\\\" \\\"Oh,\\\"\tI\tsays,\t\\\"I\tbeg\tyour\tpardon.\tPut\tme\tdown\tfor\tCalifornia.\\\" I\t had\t him\t again,\t Peters!\t He\t puzzled\t a\t second,\t then\t he\t says,\t sharp\t and irritable-- \\\"I\tdon't\tknow\tany\tsuch\tplanet--is\tit\ta\tconstellation?\\\" \\\"Oh,\tmy\tgoodness!\\\"\tsays\tI.\t\\\"Constellation,\tsays\tyou?\tNo--it's\ta\tState.\\\" \\\"Man,\t we\t don't\t deal\t in\t States\t here.\t Will\t you\t tell\t me\t where\t you\t are\t from\t in general--at\tlarge,\tdon't\tyou\tunderstand?\\\" \\\"Oh,\t now\t I\t get\t your\t idea,\\\"\t I\t says.\t \\\"I'm\t from\t America,--the\t United\t States\t of America.\\\" Peters,\tdo\tyou\tknow\tI\thad\thim\tagain?\tIf\tI\thadn't\tI'm\ta\tclam!\tHis\tface\twas\tas blank\tas\ta\ttarget\tafter\ta\tmilitia\tshooting-match.\tHe\tturned\tto\tan\tunder\tclerk\tand says-- \\\"Where\tis\tAmerica?\tWhat\tis\tAmerica?\\\" The\tunder\tclerk\tanswered\tup\tprompt\tand\tsays-- \\\"There\tain't\tany\tsuch\torb.\\\" \\\"Orb?\\\"\tsays\tI.\t\\\"Why,\twhat\tare\tyou\ttalking\tabout,\tyoung\tman?\tIt\tain't\tan\torb; it's\t a\t country;\t it's\t a\t continent.\t Columbus\t discovered\t it;\t I\t reckon\t likely\t you've heard\tof\thim,\tanyway.\tAmerica--why,\tsir,\tAmerica--\\\" \\\"Silence!\\\"\tsays\tthe\thead\tclerk.\t\\\"Once\tfor\tall,\twhere--are--you--from?\\\" \\\"Well,\\\"\tsays\tI,\t\\\"I\tdon't\tknow\tanything\tmore\tto\tsay--unless\tI\tlump\tthings,\tand just\tsay\tI'm\tfrom\tthe\tworld.\\\" \\\"Ah,\\\"\tsays\the,\tbrightening\tup,\t\\\"now\tthat's\tsomething\tlike!\tWhat\tworld?\\\" Peters,\t he\t had\t me,\t that\t time.\t I\t looked\t at\t him,\t puzzled,\t he\t looked\t at\t me, worried.\tThen\the\tburst\tout-- \\\"Come,\tcome,\twhat\tworld?\\\" Says\tI,\t\\\"Why,\tthe\tworld,\tof\tcourse.\\\" \\\"The\tworld!\\\"\the\tsays.\t\\\"H'm!\tthere's\tbillions\tof\tthem!\t.\t.\t.\tNext!\\\" That\tmeant\tfor\tme\tto\tstand\taside.\tI\tdone\tso,\tand\ta\tsky-blue\tman\twith\tseven heads\tand\tonly\tone\tleg\thopped\tinto\tmy\tplace.\tI\ttook\ta\twalk.\tIt\tjust\toccurred\tto me,\t then,\t that\t all\t the\t myriads\t I\t had\t seen\t swarming\t to\t that\t gate,\t up\t to\t this\t time,","were\tjust\tlike\tthat\tcreature.\tI\ttried\tto\trun\tacross\tsomebody\tI\twas\tacquainted\twith, but\t they\t were\t out\t of\t acquaintances\t of\t mine\t just\t then.\t So\t I\t thought\t the\t thing\t all over\tand\tfinally\tsidled\tback\tthere\tpretty\tmeek\tand\tfeeling\trather\tstumped,\tas\tyou may\tsay. \\\"Well?\\\"\tsaid\tthe\thead\tclerk. \\\"Well,\tsir,\\\"\tI\tsays,\tpretty\thumble,\t\\\"I\tdon't\tseem\tto\tmake\tout\twhich\tworld\tit\tis I'm\tfrom.\tBut\tyou\tmay\tknow\tit\tfrom\tthis--it's\tthe\tone\tthe\tSaviour\tsaved.\\\" He\tbent\this\thead\tat\tthe\tName.\tThen\the\tsays,\tgently-- \\\"The\t worlds\t He\t has\t saved\t are\t like\t to\t the\t gates\t of\t heaven\t in\t number--none can\tcount\tthem.\tWhat\tastronomical\tsystem\tis\tyour\tworld\tin?--perhaps\tthat\tmay assist.\\\" \\\"It's\t the\t one\t that\t has\t the\t sun\t in\t it--and\t the\t moon--and\t Mars\\\"--he\t shook\t his head\t at\t each\t name--hadn't\t ever\t heard\t of\t them,\t you\t see--\\\"and\t Neptune--and Uranus--and\tJupiter--\\\" \\\"Hold\ton!\\\"\tsays\the--\\\"hold\ton\ta\tminute!\tJupiter\t.\t.\t.\tJupiter\t.\t.\t.\tSeems\tto\tme we\thad\ta\tman\tfrom\tthere\teight\tor\tnine\thundred\tyears\tago--but\tpeople\tfrom\tthat system\tvery\tseldom\tenter\tby\tthis\tgate.\\\"\tAll\tof\ta\tsudden\the\tbegun\tto\tlook\tme\tso straight\tin\tthe\teye\tthat\tI\tthought\the\twas\tgoing\tto\tbore\tthrough\tme.\tThen\the\tsays, very\tdeliberate,\t\\\"Did\tyou\tcome\tstraight\there\tfrom\tyour\tsystem?\\\" \\\"Yes,\tsir,\\\"\tI\tsays--but\tI\tblushed\tthe\tleast\tlittle\tbit\tin\tthe\tworld\twhen\tI\tsaid\tit. He\tlooked\tat\tme\tvery\tstern,\tand\tsays-- \\\"That\t is\t not\t true;\t and\t this\t is\t not\t the\t place\t for\t prevarication.\t You\t wandered from\tyour\tcourse.\tHow\tdid\tthat\thappen?\\\" Says\tI,\tblushing\tagain-- \\\"I'm\t sorry,\t and\t I\t take\t back\t what\t I\t said,\t and\t confess.\t I\t raced\t a\t little\t with\t a comet\tone\tday--only\tjust\tthe\tleast\tlittle\tbit--only\tthe\ttiniest\tlit--\\\" \\\"So--so,\\\"\tsays\the--and\twithout\tany\tsugar\tin\this\tvoice\tto\tspeak\tof. I\twent\ton,\tand\tsays-- \\\"But\t I\t only\t fell\t off\t just\t a\t bare\t point,\t and\t I\t went\t right\t back\t on\t my\t course again\tthe\tminute\tthe\trace\twas\tover.\\\" \\\"No\tmatter--that\tdivergence\thas\tmade\tall\tthis\ttrouble.\tIt\thas\tbrought\tyou\tto\ta gate\t that\t is\t billions\t of\t leagues\t from\t the\t right\t one.\t If\t you\t had\t gone\t to\t your\t own gate\tthey\twould\thave\tknown\tall\tabout\tyour\tworld\tat\tonce\tand\tthere\twould\thave been\tno\tdelay.\tBut\twe\twill\ttry\tto\taccommodate\tyou.\\\"\tHe\tturned\tto\tan\tunder\tclerk and\tsays-- \\\"What\tsystem\tis\tJupiter\tin?\\\" \\\"I\t don't\t remember,\t sir,\t but\t I\t think\t there\t is\t such\t a\t planet\t in\t one\t of\t the\t little","new\tsystems\taway\tout\tin\tone\tof\tthe\tthinly\tworlded\tcorners\tof\tthe\tuniverse.\tI\twill see.\\\" He\tgot\ta\tballoon\tand\tsailed\tup\tand\tup\tand\tup,\tin\tfront\tof\ta\tmap\tthat\twas\tas big\t as\t Rhode\t Island.\t He\t went\t on\t up\t till\t he\t was\t out\t of\t sight,\t and\t by\t and\t by\t he came\t down\t and\t got\t something\t to\t eat\t and\t went\t up\t again.\t To\t cut\t a\t long\t story short,\the\tkept\ton\tdoing\tthis\tfor\ta\tday\tor\ttwo,\tand\tfinally\the\tcame\tdown\tand\tsaid he\tthought\the\thad\tfound\tthat\tsolar\tsystem,\tbut\tit\tmight\tbe\tfly-specks.\tSo\the\tgot\ta microscope\t and\t went\t back.\t It\t turned\t out\t better\t than\t he\t feared.\t He\t had\t rousted out\t our\t system,\t sure\t enough.\t He\t got\t me\t to\t describe\t our\t planet\t and\t its\t distance from\tthe\tsun,\tand\tthen\the\tsays\tto\this\tchief-- \\\"Oh,\t I\t know\t the\t one\t he\t means,\t now,\t sir.\t It\t is\t on\t the\t map.\t It\t is\t called\t the Wart.\\\" \\\"Says\t I\t to\t myself,\t \\\"Young\t man,\t it\t wouldn't\t be\t wholesome\t for\t you\t to\t go down\tthere\tand\tcall\tit\tthe\tWart.\\\" Well,\tthey\tlet\tme\tin,\tthen,\tand\ttold\tme\tI\twas\tsafe\tforever\tand\twouldn't\thave any\tmore\ttrouble. Then\tthey\tturned\tfrom\tme\tand\twent\ton\twith\ttheir\twork,\tthe\tsame\tas\tif\tthey considered\t my\t case\t all\t complete\t and\t shipshape.\t I\t was\t a\t good\t deal\t surprised\t at this,\tbut\tI\twas\tdiffident\tabout\tspeaking\tup\tand\treminding\tthem.\tI\tdid\tso\thate\tto do\t it,\t you\t know;\t it\t seemed\t a\t pity\t to\t bother\t them,\t they\t had\t so\t much\t on\t their hands.\tTwice\tI\tthought\tI\twould\tgive\tup\tand\tlet\tthe\tthing\tgo;\tso\ttwice\tI\tstarted\tto leave,\tbut\timmediately\tI\tthought\twhat\ta\tfigure\tI\tshould\tcut\tstepping\tout\tamongst the\t redeemed\t in\t such\t a\t rig,\t and\t that\t made\t me\t hang\t back\t and\t come\t to\t anchor again.\t People\t got\t to\t eying\t me--clerks,\t you\t know--wondering\t why\t I\t didn't\t get under\t way.\t I\t couldn't\t stand\t this\t long--it\t was\t too\t uncomfortable.\t So\t at\t last\t I plucked\tup\tcourage\tand\ttipped\tthe\thead\tclerk\ta\tsignal.\tHe\tsays-- \\\"What!\tyou\there\tyet?\tWhat's\twanting?\\\" Says\t I,\t in\t a\t low\t voice\t and\t very\t confidential,\t making\t a\t trumpet\t with\t my hands\tat\this\tear-- \\\"I\t beg\t pardon,\t and\t you\t mustn't\t mind\t my\t reminding\t you,\t and\t seeming\t to meddle,\tbut\thain't\tyou\tforgot\tsomething?\\\" He\tstudied\ta\tsecond,\tand\tsays-- \\\"Forgot\tsomething?\t.\t.\t.\tNo,\tnot\tthat\tI\tknow\tof.\\\" \\\"Think,\\\"\tsays\tI. He\tthought.\tThen\the\tsays-- \\\"No,\tI\tcan't\tseem\tto\thave\tforgot\tanything.\tWhat\tis\tit?\\\" \\\"Look\tat\tme,\\\"\tsays\tI,\t\\\"look\tme\tall\tover.\\\"","He\tdone\tit. \\\"Well?\\\"\tsays\the. \\\"Well,\\\"\t says\t I,\t \\\"you\t don't\t notice\t anything?\t If\t I\t branched\t out\t amongst\t the elect\tlooking\tlike\tthis,\twouldn't\tI\tattract\tconsiderable\tattention?--wouldn't\tI\tbe\ta little\tconspicuous?\\\" \\\"Well,\\\"\the\tsays,\t\\\"I\tdon't\tsee\tanything\tthe\tmatter.\tWhat\tdo\tyou\tlack?\\\" \\\"Lack!\t Why,\t I\t lack\t my\t harp,\t and\t my\t wreath,\t and\t my\t halo,\t and\t my\t hymn- book,\t and\t my\t palm\t branch--I\t lack\t everything\t that\t a\t body\t naturally\t requires\t up here,\tmy\tfriend.\\\" Puzzled?\t Peters,\t he\t was\t the\t worst\t puzzled\t man\t you\t ever\t saw.\t Finally\t he says-- \\\"Well,\tyou\tseem\tto\tbe\ta\tcuriosity\tevery\tway\ta\tbody\ttakes\tyou.\tI\tnever\theard of\tthese\tthings\tbefore.\\\" I\tlooked\tat\tthe\tman\tawhile\tin\tsolid\tastonishment;\tthen\tI\tsays-- \\\"Now,\tI\thope\tyou\tdon't\ttake\tit\tas\tan\toffence,\tfor\tI\tdon't\tmean\tany,\tbut\treally, for\t a\t man\t that\t has\t been\t in\t the\t Kingdom\t as\t long\t as\t I\t reckon\t you\t have,\t you\t do seem\tto\tknow\tpowerful\tlittle\tabout\tits\tcustoms.\\\" \\\"Its\tcustoms!\\\"\tsays\the.\t\\\"Heaven\tis\ta\tlarge\tplace,\tgood\tfriend.\tLarge\tempires have\t many\t and\t diverse\t customs.\t Even\t small\t dominions\t have,\t as\t you\t doubtless know\tby\twhat\tyou\thave\tseen\tof\tthe\tmatter\ton\ta\tsmall\tscale\tin\tthe\tWart.\tHow\tcan you\timagine\tI\tcould\tever\tlearn\tthe\tvaried\tcustoms\tof\tthe\tcountless\tkingdoms\tof heaven?\tIt\tmakes\tmy\thead\tache\tto\tthink\tof\tit.\tI\tknow\tthe\tcustoms\tthat\tprevail\tin those\tportions\tinhabited\tby\tpeoples\tthat\tare\tappointed\tto\tenter\tby\tmy\town\tgate-- and\thark\tye,\tthat\tis\tquite\tenough\tknowledge\tfor\tone\tindividual\tto\ttry\tto\tpack\tinto his\thead\tin\tthe\tthirty-seven\tmillions\tof\tyears\tI\thave\tdevoted\tnight\tand\tday\tto\tthat study.\t But\t the\t idea\t of\t learning\t the\t customs\t of\t the\t whole\t appalling\t expanse\t of heaven--O\tman,\thow\tinsanely\tyou\ttalk!\tNow\tI\tdon't\tdoubt\tthat\tthis\todd\tcostume you\t talk\t about\t is\t the\t fashion\t in\t that\t district\t of\t heaven\t you\t belong\t to,\t but\t you won't\tbe\tconspicuous\tin\tthis\tsection\twithout\tit.\\\" I\tfelt\tall\tright,\tif\tthat\twas\tthe\tcase,\tso\tI\tbade\thim\tgood-day\tand\tleft.\tAll\tday\tI walked\ttowards\tthe\tfar\tend\tof\ta\tprodigious\thall\tof\tthe\toffice,\thoping\tto\tcome\tout into\theaven\tany\tmoment,\tbut\tit\twas\ta\tmistake.\tThat\thall\twas\tbuilt\ton\tthe\tgeneral heavenly\t plan--it\t naturally\t couldn't\t be\t small.\t At\t last\t I\t got\t so\t tired\t I\t couldn't\t go any\t farther;\t so\t I\t sat\t down\t to\t rest,\t and\t began\t to\t tackle\t the\t queerest\t sort\t of strangers\t and\t ask\t for\t information,\t but\t I\t didn't\t get\t any;\t they\t couldn't\t understand my\tlanguage,\tand\tI\tcould\tnot\tunderstand\ttheirs.\tI\tgot\tdreadfully\tlonesome.\tI\twas so\t downhearted\t and\t homesick\t I\t wished\t a\t hundred\t times\t I\t never\t had\t died.\t I","turned\tback,\tof\tcourse.\tAbout\tnoon\tnext\tday,\tI\tgot\tback\tat\tlast\tand\twas\ton\thand at\tthe\tbooking-office\tonce\tmore.\tSays\tI\tto\tthe\thead\tclerk-- \\\"I\tbegin\tto\tsee\tthat\ta\tman's\tgot\tto\tbe\tin\this\town\theaven\tto\tbe\thappy.\\\" \\\"Perfectly\t correct,\\\"\t says\t he.\t \\\"Did\t you\t imagine\t the\t same\t heaven\t would\t suit all\tsorts\tof\tmen?\\\" \\\"Well,\tI\thad\tthat\tidea--but\tI\tsee\tthe\tfoolishness\tof\tit.\tWhich\tway\tam\tI\tto\tgo to\tget\tto\tmy\tdistrict?\\\" He\t called\t the\t under\t clerk\t that\t had\t examined\t the\t map,\t and\t he\t gave\t me general\tdirections.\tI\tthanked\thim\tand\tstarted;\tbut\the\tsays-- \\\"Wait\ta\tminute;\tit\tis\tmillions\tof\tleagues\tfrom\there.\tGo\toutside\tand\tstand\ton that\t red\t wishing-carpet;\t shut\t your\t eyes,\t hold\t your\t breath,\t and\t wish\t yourself there.\\\" \\\"I'm\t much\t obliged,\\\"\t says\t I;\t \\\"why\t didn't\t you\t dart\t me\t through\t when\t I\t first arrived?\\\" \\\"We\thave\ta\tgood\tdeal\tto\tthink\tof\there;\tit\twas\tyour\tplace\tto\tthink\tof\tit\tand\task for\t it.\t Good-by;\t we\t probably\t sha'n't\t see\t you\t in\t this\t region\t for\t a\t thousand centuries\tor\tso.\\\" \\\"In\tthat\tcase,\to\trevoor,\\\"\tsays\tI. I\thopped\tonto\tthe\tcarpet\tand\theld\tmy\tbreath\tand\tshut\tmy\teyes\tand\twished\tI was\t in\t the\t booking-office\t of\t my\t own\t section.\t The\t very\t next\t instant\t a\t voice\t I knew\tsung\tout\tin\ta\tbusiness\tkind\tof\ta\tway-- \\\"A\t harp\t and\t a\t hymn-book,\t pair\t of\t wings\t and\t a\t halo,\t size\t 13,\t for\t Cap'n\t Eli Stormfield,\t of\t San\t Francisco!--make\t him\t out\t a\t clean\t bill\t of\t health,\t and\t let\t him in.\\\" I\t opened\t my\t eyes.\t Sure\t enough,\t it\t was\t a\t Pi\t Ute\t Injun\t I\t used\t to\t know\t in Tulare\t County;\t mighty\t good\t fellow--I\t remembered\t being\t at\t his\t funeral,\t which consisted\t of\t him\t being\t burnt\t and\t the\t other\t Injuns\t gauming\t their\t faces\t with\t his ashes\tand\thowling\tlike\twild-cats.\tHe\twas\tpowerful\tglad\tto\tsee\tme,\tand\tyou\tmay make\tup\tyour\tmind\tI\twas\tjust\tas\tglad\tto\tsee\thim,\tand\tfelt\tthat\tI\twas\tin\tthe\tright kind\tof\ta\theaven\tat\tlast. Just\tas\tfar\tas\tyour\teye\tcould\treach,\tthere\twas\tswarms\tof\tclerks,\trunning\tand bustling\taround,\ttricking\tout\tthousands\tof\tYanks\tand\tMexicans\tand\tEnglish\tand Arabs,\tand\tall\tsorts\tof\tpeople\tin\ttheir\tnew\toutfits;\tand\twhen\tthey\tgave\tme\tmy\tkit and\tI\tput\ton\tmy\thalo\tand\tI\ttook\ta\tlook\tin\tthe\tglass,\tI\tcould\thave\tjumped\tover\ta house\tfor\tjoy,\tI\twas\tso\thappy.\t\\\"Now\tthis\tis\tsomething\tlike!\\\"\tsays\tI.\t\\\"Now,\\\"\tsays I,\t\\\"I'm\tall\tright--show\tme\ta\tcloud.\\\" Inside\t of\t fifteen\t minutes\t I\t was\t a\t mile\t on\t my\t way\t towards\t the\t cloud-banks","and\tabout\ta\tmillion\tpeople\talong\twith\tme.\tMost\tof\tus\ttried\tto\tfly,\tbut\tsome\tgot crippled\t and\t nobody\t made\t a\t success\t of\t it.\t So\t we\t concluded\t to\t walk,\t for\t the present,\ttill\twe\thad\thad\tsome\twing\tpractice. We\tbegun\tto\tmeet\tswarms\tof\tfolks\twho\twere\tcoming\tback.\tSome\thad\tharps and\t nothing\t else;\t some\t had\t hymn-books\t and\t nothing\t else;\t some\t had\t nothing\t at all;\t all\t of\t them\t looked\t meek\t and\t uncomfortable;\t one\t young\t fellow\t hadn't anything\tleft\tbut\this\thalo,\tand\the\twas\tcarrying\tthat\tin\this\thand;\tall\tof\ta\tsudden\the offered\tit\tto\tme\tand\tsays-- \\\"Will\tyou\thold\tit\tfor\tme\ta\tminute?\\\" Then\the\tdisappeared\tin\tthe\tcrowd.\tI\twent\ton.\tA\twoman\tasked\tme\tto\thold\ther palm\t branch,\t and\t then\t she\t disappeared.\t A\t girl\t got\t me\t to\t hold\t her\t harp\t for\t her, and\t by\t George,\t she\t disappeared;\t and\t so\t on\t and\t so\t on,\t till\t I\t was\t about\t loaded down\tto\tthe\tguards.\tThen\tcomes\ta\tsmiling\told\tgentleman\tand\tasked\tme\tto\thold his\tthings.\tI\tswabbed\toff\tthe\tperspiration\tand\tsays,\tpretty\ttart-- \\\"I'll\thave\tto\tget\tyou\tto\texcuse\tme,\tmy\tfriend,--I\tain't\tno\that-rack.\\\" About\tthis\ttime\tI\tbegun\tto\trun\tacross\tpiles\tof\tthose\ttraps,\tlying\tin\tthe\troad.\tI just\t quietly\t dumped\t my\t extra\t cargo\t along\t with\t them.\t I\t looked\t around,\t and, Peters,\t that\t whole\t nation\t that\t was\t following\t me\t were\t loaded\t down\t the\t same\t as I'd\t been.\t The\t return\t crowd\t had\t got\t them\t to\t hold\t their\t things\t a\t minute,\t you\t see. They\tall\tdumped\ttheir\tloads,\ttoo,\tand\twe\twent\ton. When\tI\tfound\tmyself\tperched\ton\ta\tcloud,\twith\ta\tmillion\tother\tpeople,\tI\tnever felt\tso\tgood\tin\tmy\tlife.\tSays\tI,\t\\\"Now\tthis\tis\taccording\tto\tthe\tpromises;\tI've\tbeen having\t my\t doubts,\t but\t now\t I\t am\t in\t heaven,\t sure\t enough.\\\"\t I\t gave\t my\t palm branch\ta\twave\tor\ttwo,\tfor\tluck,\tand\tthen\tI\ttautened\tup\tmy\tharpstrings\tand\tstruck in.\tWell,\tPeters,\tyou\tcan't\timagine\tanything\tlike\tthe\trow\twe\tmade.\tIt\twas\tgrand to\t listen\t to,\t and\t made\t a\t body\t thrill\t all\t over,\t but\t there\t was\t considerable\t many tunes\tgoing\ton\tat\tonce,\tand\tthat\twas\ta\tdrawback\tto\tthe\tharmony,\tyou\tunderstand; and\t then\t there\t was\t a\t lot\t of\t Injun\t tribes,\t and\t they\t kept\t up\t such\t another\t war- whooping\t that\t they\t kind\t of\t took\t the\t tuck\t out\t of\t the\t music.\t By\t and\t by\t I\t quit performing,\tand\tjudged\tI'd\ttake\ta\trest.\tThere\twas\tquite\ta\tnice\tmild\told\tgentleman sitting\tnext\tme,\tand\tI\tnoticed\the\tdidn't\ttake\ta\thand;\tI\tencouraged\thim,\tbut\the\tsaid he\twas\tnaturally\tbashful,\tand\twas\tafraid\tto\ttry\tbefore\tso\tmany\tpeople.\tBy\tand\tby the\t old\t gentleman\t said\t he\t never\t could\t seem\t to\t enjoy\t music\t somehow.\t The\t fact was,\tI\twas\tbeginning\tto\tfeel\tthe\tsame\tway;\tbut\tI\tdidn't\tsay\tanything.\tHim\tand\tI had\t a\t considerable\t long\t silence,\t then,\t but\t of\t course\t it\t warn't\t noticeable\t in\t that place.\tAfter\tabout\tsixteen\tor\tseventeen\thours,\tduring\twhich\tI\tplayed\tand\tsung\ta little,\t now\t and\t then--always\t the\t same\t tune,\t because\t I\t didn't\t know\t any\t other--I","laid\tdown\tmy\tharp\tand\tbegun\tto\tfan\tmyself\twith\tmy\tpalm\tbranch.\tThen\twe\tboth got\tto\tsighing\tpretty\tregular.\tFinally,\tsays\the-- \\\"Don't\tyou\tknow\tany\ttune\tbut\tthe\tone\tyou've\tbeen\tpegging\tat\tall\tday?\\\" \\\"Not\tanother\tblessed\tone,\\\"\tsays\tI. \\\"Don't\tyou\treckon\tyou\tcould\tlearn\tanother\tone?\\\"\tsays\the. \\\"Never,\\\"\tsays\tI;\t\\\"I've\ttried\tto,\tbut\tI\tcouldn't\tmanage\tit.\\\" \\\"It's\ta\tlong\ttime\tto\thang\tto\tthe\tone--eternity,\tyou\tknow.\\\" \\\"Don't\tbreak\tmy\theart,\\\"\tsays\tI;\t\\\"I'm\tgetting\tlow-spirited\tenough\talready.\\\" After\tanother\tlong\tsilence,\tsays\the-- \\\"Are\tyou\tglad\tto\tbe\there?\\\" Says\t I,\t \\\"Old\t man,\t I'll\t be\t frank\t with\t you.\t This\t ain't\tjust\tas\tnear\tmy\tidea\tof bliss\tas\tI\tthought\tit\twas\tgoing\tto\tbe,\twhen\tI\tused\tto\tgo\tto\tchurch.\\\" Says\the,\t\\\"What\tdo\tyou\tsay\tto\tknocking\toff\tand\tcalling\tit\thalf\ta\tday?\\\" \\\"That's\tme,\\\"\tsays\tI.\t\\\"I\tnever\twanted\tto\tget\toff\twatch\tso\tbad\tin\tmy\tlife.\\\" So\t we\t started.\t Millions\t were\t coming\t to\t the\t cloud-bank\t all\t the\t time,\t happy and\t hosannahing;\t millions\t were\t leaving\t it\t all\t the\t time,\t looking\t mighty\t quiet,\t I tell\tyou.\tWe\tlaid\tfor\tthe\tnew-comers,\tand\tpretty\tsoon\tI'd\tgot\tthem\tto\thold\tall\tmy things\ta\tminute,\tand\tthen\tI\twas\ta\tfree\tman\tagain\tand\tmost\toutrageously\thappy. Just\t then\t I\t ran\t across\t old\t Sam\t Bartlett,\t who\t had\t been\t dead\t a\t long\t time,\t and stopped\tto\thave\ta\ttalk\twith\thim.\tSays\tI-- \\\"Now\t tell\t me--is\t this\t to\t go\t on\t forever?\t Ain't\t there\t anything\t else\t for\t a change?\\\" Says\the-- \\\"I'll\t set\t you\t right\t on\t that\t point\t very\t quick.\t People\t take\t the\t figurative language\tof\tthe\tBible\tand\tthe\tallegories\tfor\tliteral,\tand\tthe\tfirst\tthing\tthey\task\tfor when\tthey\tget\there\tis\ta\thalo\tand\ta\tharp,\tand\tso\ton.\tNothing\tthat's\tharmless\tand reasonable\t is\t refused\t a\t body\t here,\t if\t he\t asks\t it\t in\t the\t right\t spirit.\t So\t they\t are outfitted\twith\tthese\tthings\twithout\ta\tword.\tThey\tgo\tand\tsing\tand\tplay\tjust\tabout one\t day,\t and\t that's\t the\t last\t you'll\t ever\t see\t them\t in\t the\t choir.\t They\t don't\t need anybody\tto\ttell\tthem\tthat\tthat\tsort\tof\tthing\twouldn't\tmake\ta\theaven--at\tleast\tnot\ta heaven\tthat\ta\tsane\tman\tcould\tstand\ta\tweek\tand\tremain\tsane.\tThat\tcloud-bank\tis placed\t where\t the\t noise\t can't\t disturb\t the\t old\t inhabitants,\t and\t so\t there\t ain't\t any harm\tin\tletting\teverybody\tget\tup\tthere\tand\tcure\thimself\tas\tsoon\tas\the\tcomes. \\\"Now\t you\t just\t remember\t this--heaven\t is\t as\t blissful\t and\t lovely\t as\t it\t can\t be; but\tit's\tjust\tthe\tbusiest\tplace\tyou\tever\theard\tof.\tThere\tain't\tany\tidle\tpeople\there after\tthe\tfirst\tday.\tSinging\thymns\tand\twaving\tpalm\tbranches\tthrough\tall\teternity is\t pretty\t when\t you\t hear\t about\t it\t in\t the\t pulpit,\t but\t it's\t as\t poor\t a\t way\t to\t put\t in","valuable\ttime\tas\ta\tbody\tcould\tcontrive.\tIt\twould\tjust\tmake\ta\theaven\tof\twarbling ignoramuses,\t don't\t you\t see?\t Eternal\t Rest\t sounds\t comforting\t in\t the\t pulpit,\t too. Well,\t you\t try\t it\t once,\t and\t see\t how\t heavy\t time\t will\t hang\t on\t your\t hands.\t Why, Stormfield,\ta\tman\tlike\tyou,\tthat\thad\tbeen\tactive\tand\tstirring\tall\this\tlife,\twould\tgo mad\t in\t six\t months\t in\t a\t heaven\t where\t he\t hadn't\t anything\t to\t do.\t Heaven\t is\t the very\tlast\tplace\tto\tcome\tto\trest\tin,--and\tdon't\tyou\tbe\tafraid\tto\tbet\ton\tthat!\\\" Says\tI-- \\\"Sam,\tI'm\tas\tglad\tto\thear\tit\tas\tI\tthought\tI'd\tbe\tsorry.\tI'm\tglad\tI\tcome,\tnow.\\\" Says\the-- \\\"Cap'n,\tain't\tyou\tpretty\tphysically\ttired?\\\" Says\tI-- \\\"Sam,\tit\tain't\tany\tname\tfor\tit!\tI'm\tdog-tired.\\\" \\\"Just\tso--just\tso.\tYou've\tearned\ta\tgood\tsleep,\tand\tyou'll\tget\tit.\tYou've\tearned a\tgood\tappetite,\tand\tyou'll\tenjoy\tyour\tdinner.\tIt's\tthe\tsame\there\tas\tit\tis\ton\tearth-- you've\t got\t to\t earn\t a\t thing,\t square\t and\t honest,\t before\t you\t enjoy\t it.\t You\t can't enjoy\tfirst\tand\tearn\tafterwards.\tBut\tthere's\tthis\tdifference,\there:\tyou\tcan\tchoose your\town\toccupation,\tand\tall\tthe\tpowers\tof\theaven\twill\tbe\tput\tforth\tto\thelp\tyou make\ta\tsuccess\tof\tit,\tif\tyou\tdo\tyour\tlevel\tbest.\tThe\tshoemaker\ton\tearth\tthat\thad the\tsoul\tof\ta\tpoet\tin\thim\twon't\thave\tto\tmake\tshoes\there.\\\" \\\"Now\t that's\t all\t reasonable\t and\t right,\\\"\t says\t I.\t \\\"Plenty\t of\t work,\t and\t the\t kind you\thanker\tafter;\tno\tmore\tpain,\tno\tmore\tsuffering--\\\" \\\"Oh,\t hold\t on;\t there's\t plenty\t of\t pain\t here--but\t it\t don't\t kill.\t There's\t plenty\t of suffering\there,\tbut\tit\tdon't\tlast.\tYou\tsee,\thappiness\tain't\ta\tthing\tin\titself--it's\tonly a\t contrast\t with\t something\t that\t ain't\t pleasant.\t That's\t all\t it\t is.\t There\t ain't\t a\t thing you\tcan\tmention\tthat\tis\thappiness\tin\tits\town\t self--it's\tonly\tso\tby\tcontrast\twith the\t other\t thing.\t And\t so,\t as\t soon\t as\t the\t novelty\t is\t over\t and\t the\t force\t of\t the contrast\t dulled,\t it\t ain't\t happiness\t any\t longer,\t and\t you\t have\t to\t get\t something fresh.\t Well,\t there's\t plenty\t of\t pain\t and\t suffering\t in\t heaven--consequently\t there's plenty\tof\tcontrasts,\tand\tjust\tno\tend\tof\thappiness.\\\" Says\tI,\t\\\"It's\tthe\tsensiblest\theaven\tI've\theard\tof,\tyet,\tSam,\tthough\tit's\tabout\tas different\tfrom\tthe\tone\tI\twas\tbrought\tup\ton\tas\ta\tlive\tprincess\tis\tdifferent\tfrom\ther own\twax\tfigger.\\\" Along\t in\t the\t first\t months\t I\t knocked\t around\t about\t the\t Kingdom,\t making friends\t and\t looking\t at\t the\t country,\t and\t finally\t settled\t down\t in\t a\t pretty\t likely region,\t to\t have\t a\t rest\t before\t taking\t another\t start.\t I\t went\t on\t making acquaintances\t and\t gathering\t up\t information.\t I\t had\t a\t good\t deal\t of\t talk\t with\t an old\t bald-headed\t angel\t by\t the\t name\t of\t Sandy\t McWilliams.\t He\t was\t from","somewhere\tin\tNew\tJersey.\tI\twent\tabout\twith\thim,\tconsiderable.\tWe\tused\tto\tlay around,\t warm\t afternoons,\t in\t the\t shade\t of\t a\t rock,\t on\t some\t meadow-ground\t that was\tpretty\thigh\tand\tout\tof\tthe\tmarshy\tslush\tof\this\tcranberry-farm,\tand\tthere\twe used\tto\ttalk\tabout\tall\tkinds\tof\tthings,\tand\tsmoke\tpipes.\tOne\tday,\tsays\tI-- \\\"About\thow\told\tmight\tyou\tbe,\tSandy?\\\" \\\"Seventy-two.\\\" \\\"I\tjudged\tso.\tHow\tlong\tyou\tbeen\tin\theaven?\\\" \\\"Twenty-seven\tyears,\tcome\tChristmas.\\\" \\\"How\told\twas\tyou\twhen\tyou\tcome\tup?\\\" \\\"Why,\tseventy-two,\tof\tcourse.\\\" \\\"You\tcan't\tmean\tit!\\\" \\\"Why\tcan't\tI\tmean\tit?\\\" \\\"Because,\tif\tyou\twas\tseventy-two\tthen,\tyou\tare\tnaturally\tninety-nine\tnow.\\\" \\\"No,\tbut\tI\tain't.\tI\tstay\tthe\tsame\tage\tI\twas\twhen\tI\tcome.\\\" \\\"Well,\\\"\tsays\tI,\t\\\"come\tto\tthink,\tthere's\tsomething\tjust\there\tthat\tI\twant\tto\task about.\tDown\tbelow,\tI\talways\thad\tan\tidea\tthat\tin\theaven\twe\twould\tall\tbe\tyoung, and\tbright,\tand\tspry.\\\" \\\"Well,\tyou\tcan\tbe\tyoung\tif\tyou\twant\tto.\tYou've\tonly\tgot\tto\twish.\\\" \\\"Well,\tthen,\twhy\tdidn't\tyou\twish?\\\" \\\"I\tdid.\tThey\tall\tdo.\tYou'll\ttry\tit,\tsome\tday,\tlike\tenough;\tbut\tyou'll\tget\ttired\tof the\tchange\tpretty\tsoon.\\\" \\\"Why?\\\" \\\"Well,\tI'll\ttell\tyou.\tNow\tyou've\talways\tbeen\ta\tsailor;\tdid\tyou\tever\ttry\tsome other\tbusiness?\\\" \\\"Yes,\tI\ttried\tkeeping\tgrocery,\tonce,\tup\tin\tthe\tmines;\tbut\tI\tcouldn't\tstand\tit;\tit was\t too\t dull--no\t stir,\t no\t storm,\t no\t life\t about\t it;\t it\t was\t like\t being\t part\t dead\t and part\talive,\tboth\tat\t the\tsame\ttime.\tI\t wanted\tto\tbe\tone\tthing\tor\tt'other.\tI\tshut\tup shop\tpretty\tquick\tand\twent\tto\tsea.\\\" \\\"That's\tit.\tGrocery\tpeople\tlike\tit,\tbut\tyou\tcouldn't.\tYou\tsee\tyou\twasn't\tused to\tit.\tWell,\tI\twasn't\tused\tto\tbeing\tyoung,\tand\tI\tcouldn't\tseem\tto\ttake\tany\tinterest in\tit.\tI\twas\tstrong,\tand\thandsome,\tand\thad\tcurly\thair,--yes,\tand\twings,\ttoo!--gay wings\tlike\ta\tbutterfly.\tI\twent\tto\tpicnics\tand\tdances\tand\tparties\twith\tthe\tfellows, and\t tried\t to\t carry\t on\t and\t talk\t nonsense\t with\t the\t girls,\t but\t it\t wasn't\t any\t use;\t I couldn't\ttake\tto\tit--fact\tis,\tit\twas\tan\tawful\tbore.\tWhat\tI\twanted\twas\tearly\tto\tbed and\tearly\tto\trise,\tand\tsomething\tto\tdo;\tand\twhen\tmy\twork\twas\tdone,\tI\twanted\tto sit\t quiet,\t and\t smoke\t and\t think--not\t tear\t around\t with\t a\t parcel\t of\t giddy\t young kids.\tYou\tcan't\tthink\twhat\tI\tsuffered\twhilst\tI\twas\tyoung.\\\"","\\\"How\tlong\twas\tyou\tyoung?\\\" \\\"Only\t two\t weeks.\t That\t was\t plenty\t for\t me.\t Laws,\t I\t was\t so\t lonesome!\t You see,\t I\t was\t full\t of\t the\t knowledge\t and\t experience\t of\t seventy-two\t years;\t the deepest\tsubject\tthose\tyoung\tfolks\tcould\tstrike\twas\tonly\ta-b-c\tto\tme.\tAnd\tto\thear them\targue--oh,\tmy!\tit\twould\thave\tbeen\tfunny,\tif\tit\thadn't\tbeen\tso\tpitiful.\tWell,\tI was\tso\thungry\tfor\tthe\tways\tand\tthe\tsober\ttalk\tI\twas\tused\tto,\tthat\tI\ttried\tto\tring\tin with\t the\t old\t people,\t but\t they\t wouldn't\t have\t it.\t They\t considered\t me\t a\t conceited young\tup-start,\tand\tgave\tme\tthe\tcold\tshoulder.\tTwo\tweeks\twas\ta-plenty\tfor\tme.\tI was\t glad\t to\t get\t back\t my\t bald\t head\t again,\t and\t my\t pipe,\t and\t my\t old\t drowsy reflections\tin\tthe\tshade\tof\ta\trock\tor\ta\ttree.\\\" \\\"Well,\\\"\tsays\tI,\t\\\"do\tyou\tmean\tto\tsay\tyou're\tgoing\tto\tstand\tstill\tat\tseventy-two, forever?\\\" \\\"I\tdon't\tknow,\tand\tI\tain't\tparticular.\tBut\tI\tain't\tgoing\tto\tdrop\tback\tto\ttwenty- five\tany\tmore--I\tknow\tthat,\tmighty\twell.\tI\tknow\ta\tsight\tmore\tthan\tI\tdid\ttwenty- seven\t years\t ago,\t and\t I\t enjoy\t learning,\t all\t the\t time,\t but\t I\t don't\t seem\t to\t get\t any older.\tThat\tis,\tbodily--my\tmind\tgets\tolder,\tand\tstronger,\tand\tbetter\tseasoned,\tand more\tsatisfactory.\\\" Says\tI,\t\\\"If\ta\tman\tcomes\there\tat\tninety,\tdon't\the\tever\tset\thimself\tback?\\\" \\\"Of\t course\t he\t does.\t He\t sets\t himself\t back\t to\t fourteen;\t tries\t it\t a\t couple\t of hours,\t and\t feels\t like\t a\t fool;\t sets\t himself\t forward\t to\t twenty;\t it\t ain't\t much improvement;\t tries\t thirty,\t fifty,\t eighty,\t and\t finally\t ninety--finds\t he\t is\t more\t at home\t and\t comfortable\t at\t the\t same\t old\t figure\t he\t is\t used\t to\t than\t any\t other\t way. Or,\tif\this\tmind\tbegun\tto\tfail\thim\ton\tearth\tat\teighty,\tthat's\twhere\the\tfinally\tsticks up\t here.\t He\t sticks\t at\t the\t place\t where\t his\t mind\t was\t last\t at\t its\t best,\t for\t there's where\this\tenjoyment\tis\tbest,\tand\this\tways\tmost\tset\tand\testablished.\\\" \\\"Does\ta\tchap\tof\ttwenty-five\tstay\talways\ttwenty-five,\tand\tlook\tit?\\\" \\\"If\t he\t is\t a\t fool,\t yes.\t But\t if\t he\t is\t bright,\t and\t ambitious\t and\t industrious,\t the knowledge\t he\t gains\t and\t the\t experience\t he\t has,\t change\t his\t ways\t and\t thoughts and\tlikings,\tand\tmake\thim\tfind\this\tbest\tpleasure\tin\tthe\tcompany\tof\tpeople\tabove that\tage;\tso\the\tallows\this\tbody\tto\ttake\ton\tthat\tlook\tof\tas\tmany\tadded\tyears\tas\the needs\t to\t make\t him\t comfortable\t and\t proper\t in\t that\t sort\t of\t society;\t he\t lets\t his body\tgo\ton\ttaking\tthe\tlook\tof\tage,\taccording\tas\the\tprogresses,\tand\tby\tand\tby\the will\tbe\tbald\tand\twrinkled\toutside,\tand\twise\tand\tdeep\twithin.\\\" \\\"Babies\tthe\tsame?\\\" \\\"Babies\t the\t same.\t Laws,\t what\t asses\t we\t used\t to\t be,\t on\t earth,\t about\t these things!\tWe\tsaid\twe'd\tbe\talways\tyoung\tin\theaven.\tWe\tdidn't\tsay\thow\tyoung--we didn't\t think\t of\t that,\t perhaps--that\t is,\t we\t didn't\t all\t think\t alike,\t anyway.\t When\t I","was\ta\tboy\tof\tseven,\t I\tsuppose\tI\tthought\twe'd\tall\tbe\ttwelve,\tin\theaven;\twhen\tI was\ttwelve,\tI\tsuppose\tI\tthought\twe'd\tall\tbe\teighteen\tor\ttwenty\tin\theaven;\twhen\tI was\tforty,\tI\tbegun\tto\tgo\tback;\tI\tremember\tI\thoped\twe'd\tall\tbe\tabout\tthirty\tyears old\tin\theaven.\tNeither\ta\tman\tnor\ta\tboy\tever\tthinks\tthe\tage\the\thas\tis\texactly\tthe best\tone--he\tputs\tthe\tright\tage\ta\tfew\tyears\tolder\tor\ta\tfew\tyears\tyounger\tthan\the is.\tThen\the\tmakes\tthe\tideal\tage\tthe\tgeneral\tage\tof\tthe\theavenly\tpeople.\tAnd\the expects\t everybody\t to\t stick\t at\t that\t age--stand\t stock-still--and\t expects\t them\t to enjoy\t it!--\t Now\t just\t think\t of\t the\t idea\t of\t standing\t still\t in\t heaven!\t Think\t of\t a heaven\t made\t up\t entirely\t of\t hoop-rolling,\t marble-playing\t cubs\t of\t seven\t years!-- or\t of\t awkward,\t diffident,\t sentimental\t immaturities\t of\t nineteen!--or\t of\t vigorous people\tof\tthirty,\thealthy-minded,\tbrimming\twith\tambition,\tbut\tchained\thand\tand foot\tto\tthat\tone\tage\tand\tits\tlimitations\tlike\tso\tmany\thelpless\tgalley-slaves!\tThink of\tthe\tdull\tsameness\tof\ta\tsociety\tmade\tup\tof\tpeople\tall\tof\tone\tage\tand\tone\tset\tof looks,\thabits,\ttastes\tand\tfeelings.\tThink\thow\tsuperior\tto\tit\tearth\twould\tbe,\twith its\tvariety\tof\ttypes\tand\tfaces\tand\tages,\tand\tthe\tenlivening\tattrition\tof\tthe\tmyriad interests\tthat\tcome\tinto\tpleasant\tcollision\tin\tsuch\ta\tvariegated\tsociety.\\\" \\\"Look\there,\\\"\tsays\tI,\t\\\"do\tyou\tknow\twhat\tyou're\tdoing?\\\" \\\"Well,\twhat\tam\tI\tdoing?\\\" \\\"You\tare\tmaking\theaven\tpretty\tcomfortable\tin\tone\tway,\tbut\tyou\tare\tplaying the\tmischief\twith\tit\tin\tanother.\\\" \\\"How\td'you\tmean?\\\" \\\"Well,\\\"\tI\tsays,\t\\\"take\ta\tyoung\tmother\tthat's\tlost\ther\tchild,\tand--\\\" \\\"'Sh!\\\"\the\tsays.\t\\\"Look!\\\" It\twas\ta\twoman.\tMiddle-aged,\tand\thad\tgrizzled\thair.\tShe\twas\twalking\tslow, and\t her\t head\t was\t bent\t down,\t and\t her\t wings\t hanging\t limp\t and\t droopy;\t and\t she looked\tever\tso\ttired,\tand\twas\tcrying,\tpoor\tthing!\tShe\tpassed\talong\tby,\twith\ther head\t down,\t that\t way,\t and\t the\t tears\t running\t down\t her\t face,\t and\t didn't\t see\t us. Then\tSandy\tsaid,\tlow\tand\tgentle,\tand\tfull\tof\tpity: \\\"She's\thunting\tfor\ther\tchild!\tNo,\tfound\tit,\tI\treckon.\tLord,\thow\tshe's\tchanged! But\tI\trecognized\ther\tin\ta\tminute,\tthough\tit's\ttwenty-seven\tyears\tsince\tI\tsaw\ther. A\tyoung\tmother\tshe\twas,\tabout\ttwenty-two\tor\tfour,\tor\talong\tthere;\tand\tblooming and\t lovely\t and\t sweet--oh,\t just\t a\t flower!\t And\t all\t her\t heart\t and\t all\t her\t soul\t was wrapped\tup\tin\ther\tchild,\ther\tlittle\tgirl,\ttwo\tyears\told.\tAnd\tit\tdied,\tand\tshe\twent wild\twith\tgrief,\tjust\twild!\tWell,\tthe\tonly\tcomfort\tshe\thad\twas\tthat\tshe'd\tsee\ther child\tagain,\tin\theaven--'never\tmore\tto\tpart,'\tshe\tsaid,\tand\tkept\ton\tsaying\tit\tover and\t over,\t 'never\t more\t to\t part.'\t And\t the\t words\t made\t her\t happy;\t yes,\t they\t did; they\t made\t her\t joyful;\t and\t when\t I\t was\t dying,\t twenty-seven\t years\t ago,\t she\t told","me\t to\t find\t her\t child\t the\t first\t thing,\t and\t say\t she\t was\t coming--'soon,\t soon,\t very soon,\tshe\thoped\tand\tbelieved!'\\\" \\\"Why,\tit's\tpitiful,\tSandy.\\\" He\t didn't\t say\t anything\t for\t a\t while,\t but\t sat\t looking\t at\t the\t ground,\t thinking. Then\the\tsays,\tkind\tof\tmournful: \\\"And\tnow\tshe's\tcome!\\\" \\\"Well?\tGo\ton.\\\" \\\"Stormfield,\tmaybe\tshe\thasn't\tfound\tthe\tchild,\tbut\tI\tthink\tshe\thas.\tLooks\tso to\t me.\t I've\t seen\t cases\t before.\t You\t see,\t she's\t kept\t that\t child\t in\t her\t head\t just\t the same\tas\tit\twas\twhen\tshe\tjounced\tit\tin\ther\tarms\ta\tlittle\tchubby\tthing.\tBut\there\tit didn't\telect\tto\tstay\ta\tchild.\tNo,\tit\telected\tto\tgrow\tup,\twhich\tit\tdid.\tAnd\tin\tthese twenty-seven\tyears\tit\thas\tlearned\tall\tthe\tdeep\tscientific\tlearning\tthere\tis\tto\tlearn, and\t is\t studying\t and\t studying\t and\t learning\t and\t learning\t more\t and\t more,\t all\t the time,\t and\t don't\t give\t a\t damn\t for\t anything\t but\t learning;\t just\t learning,\t and discussing\tgigantic\tproblems\twith\tpeople\tlike\therself.\\\" \\\"Well?\\\" \\\"Stormfield,\tdon't\tyou\tsee?\tHer\tmother\tknows\tcranberries,\tand\thow\tto\ttend them,\tand\tpick\tthem,\tand\tput\tthem\tup,\tand\tmarket\tthem;\tand\tnot\tanother\tblamed thing!\tHer\tand\ther\tdaughter\tcan't\tbe\tany\tmore\tcompany\tfor\teach\tother\tnow\tthan mud\tturtle\tand\tbird\to'\tparadise.\tPoor\tthing,\tshe\twas\tlooking\tfor\ta\tbaby\tto\tjounce; I\tthink\tshe's\tstruck\ta\tdisappintment.\\\" \\\"Sandy,\twhat\twill\tthey\tdo--stay\tunhappy\tforever\tin\theaven?\\\" \\\"No,\tthey'll\tcome\ttogether\tand\tget\tadjusted\tby\tand\tby.\tBut\tnot\tthis\tyear,\tand not\tnext.\tBy\tand\tby.\\\" 2 I\t had\t been\t having\t considerable\t trouble\t with\t my\t wings.\t The\t day\t after\t I helped\tthe\tchoir\tI\tmade\ta\tdash\tor\ttwo\twith\tthem,\tbut\twas\tnot\tlucky.\tFirst\toff,\tI flew\t thirty\t yards,\t and\t then\t fouled\t an\t Irishman\t and\t brought\t him\t down--brought us\t both\t down,\t in\t fact.\t Next,\t I\t had\t a\t collision\t with\t a\t Bishop--and\t bowled\t him down,\t of\t course.\t We\t had\t some\t sharp\t words,\t and\t I\t felt\t pretty\t cheap,\t to\t come banging\tinto\ta\tgrave\told\tperson\tlike\tthat,\twith\ta\tmillion\tstrangers\tlooking\ton\tand smiling\tto\tthemselves. I\tsaw\tI\thadn't\tgot\tthe\thang\tof\tthe\tsteering,\tand\tso\tcouldn't\trightly\ttell\twhere\tI","was\tgoing\tto\tbring\tup\twhen\tI\tstarted.\tI\twent\tafoot\tthe\trest\tof\tthe\tday,\tand\tlet\tmy wings\thang.\tEarly\tnext\tmorning\tI\twent\tto\ta\tprivate\tplace\tto\thave\tsome\tpractice. I\t got\t up\t on\t a\t pretty\t high\t rock,\t and\t got\t a\t good\t start,\t and\t went\t swooping\t down, aiming\t for\t a\t bush\t a\t little\t over\t three\t hundred\t yards\t off;\t but\t I\t couldn't\t seem\t to calculate\tfor\tthe\twind,\twhich\twas\tabout\ttwo\tpoints\tabaft\tmy\tbeam.\tI\tcould\tsee\tI was\t going\t considerable\t to\t looard\t of\t the\t bush,\t so\t I\t worked\t my\t starboard\t wing slow\tand\twent\tahead\tstrong\ton\tthe\tport\tone,\tbut\tit\twouldn't\tanswer;\tI\tcould\tsee\tI was\t going\t to\t broach\t to,\t so\t I\t slowed\t down\t on\t both,\t and\t lit.\t I\t went\t back\t to\t the rock\tand\ttook\tanother\tchance\tat\tit.\tI\taimed\ttwo\tor\tthree\tpoints\tto\tstarboard\tof\tthe bush--yes,\t more\t than\t that--enough\t so\t as\t to\t make\t it\t nearly\t a\t head-wind.\t I\t done well\t enough,\t but\t made\t pretty\t poor\t time.\t I\t could\t see,\t plain\t enough,\t that\t on\t a head-wind,\t wings\t was\t a\t mistake.\t I\t could\t see\t that\t a\t body\t could\t sail\t pretty\t close to\tthe\twind,\tbut\the\tcouldn't\tgo\tin\tthe\twind's\teye.\tI\tcould\tsee\tthat\tif\tI\twanted\tto go\ta-visiting\tany\tdistance\tfrom\thome,\tand\tthe\twind\twas\tahead,\tI\tmight\thave\tto wait\tdays,\tmaybe,\tfor\ta\tchange;\tand\tI\tcould\tsee,\ttoo,\tthat\tthese\tthings\tcould\tnot be\tany\tuse\tat\tall\tin\ta\tgale;\tif\tyou\ttried\tto\trun\tbefore\tthe\twind,\tyou\twould\tmake\ta mess\t of\t it,\t for\t there\t isn't\t any\t way\t to\t shorten\t sail--like\t reefing,\t you\t know--you have\tto\ttake\tit\tall\tin--shut\tyour\tfeathers\tdown\tflat\tto\tyour\tsides.\tThat\twould\tland you,\tof\tcourse.\tYou\tcould\tlay\tto,\twith\tyour\thead\tto\tthe\twind--that\tis\tthe\tbest\tyou could\tdo,\tand\tright\thard\twork\tyou'd\tfind\tit,\ttoo.\tIf\tyou\ttried\tany\tother\tgame,\tyou would\tfounder,\tsure. I\t judge\t it\t was\t about\t a\t couple\t of\t weeks\t or\t so\t after\t this\t that\t I\t dropped\t old Sandy\t McWilliams\t a\t note\t one\t day--it\t was\t a\t Tuesday--and\t asked\t him\t to\t come over\tand\ttake\this\tmanna\tand\tquails\twith\tme\tnext\tday;\tand\tthe\tfirst\tthing\the\tdid when\the\tstepped\tin\twas\tto\ttwinkle\this\teye\tin\ta\tsly\tway,\tand\tsay,-- \\\"Well,\tCap,\twhat\tyou\tdone\twith\tyour\twings?\\\" I\t saw\t in\t a\t minute\t that\t there\t was\t some\t sarcasm\t done\t up\t in\t that\t rag somewheres,\tbut\tI\tnever\tlet\ton.\tI\tonly\tsays,-- \\\"Gone\tto\tthe\twash.\\\" \\\"Yes,\\\"\the\tsays,\tin\ta\tdry\tsort\tof\tway,\t\\\"they\tmostly\tgo\tto\tthe\twash--about\tthis time--I've\toften\tnoticed\tit.\tFresh\tangels\tare\tpowerful\tneat.\tWhen\tdo\tyou\tlook\tfor 'em\tback?\\\" \\\"Day\tafter\tto-morrow,\\\"\tsays\tI. He\twinked\tat\tme,\tand\tsmiled. Says\tI,-- \\\"Sandy,\tout\twith\tit.\tCome--no\tsecrets\tamong\tfriends.\tI\tnotice\tyou\tdon't\tever wear\t wings--and\t plenty\t others\t don't.\t I've\t been\t making\t an\t ass\t of\t myself--is\t that","it?\\\" \\\"That\t is\t about\t the\t size\t of\t it.\t But\t it\t is\t no\t harm.\t We\t all\t do\t it\t at\t first.\t It's perfectly\tnatural.\tYou\tsee,\ton\tearth\twe\tjumped\tto\tsuch\tfoolish\tconclusions\tas\tto things\tup\there.\tIn\tthe\tpictures\twe\talways\tsaw\tthe\tangels\twith\twings\ton--and\tthat was\tall\tright;\tbut\twe\tjumped\tto\tthe\tconclusion\tthat\tthat\twas\ttheir\tway\tof\tgetting around--and\t that\t was\t all\t wrong.\t The\t wings\t ain't\t anything\t but\t a\t uniform,\t that's all.\t When\t they\t are\t in\t the\t field--so\t to\t speak--they\t always\t wear\t them;\t you\t never see\t an\t angel\t going\t with\t a\t message\t anywhere\t without\t his\t wings,\t any\t more\t than you\twould\tsee\ta\tmilitary\tofficer\tpresiding\tat\ta\tcourt-martial\twithout\this\tuniform, or\ta\tpostman\tdelivering\tletters,\tor\ta\tpoliceman\twalking\this\tbeat,\tin\tplain\tclothes. But\tthey\tain't\tto\tfly\twith!\tThe\twings\tare\tfor\tshow,\tnot\tfor\tuse.\tOld\texperienced angels\t are\t like\t officers\t of\t the\t regular\t army--they\t dress\t plain,\t when\t they\t are\t off duty.\t New\t angels\t are\t like\t the\t militia--never\t shed\t the\t uniform--always\t fluttering and\t floundering\t around\t in\t their\t wings,\t butting\t people\t down,\t flapping\t here,\t and there,\t and\t everywhere,\t always\t imagining\t they\t are\t attracting\t the\t admiring\t eye-- well,\t they\t just\t think\t they\t are\t the\t very\t most\t important\t people\t in\t heaven.\t And when\t you\t see\t one\t of\t them\t come\t sailing\t around\t with\t one\t wing\t tipped\t up\t and t'other\tdown,\tyou\tmake\tup\tyour\tmind\the\tis\tsaying\tto\thimself:\t'I\twish\tMary\tAnn in\t Arkansaw\t could\t see\t me\t now.\t I\t reckon\t she'd\t wish\t she\t hadn't\t shook\t me.'\t No, they're\tjust\tfor\tshow,\tthat's\tall--only\tjust\tfor\tshow.\\\" \\\"I\tjudge\tyou've\tgot\tit\tabout\tright,\tSandy,\\\"\tsays\tI. \\\"Why,\tlook\tat\tit\tyourself,\\\"\tsays\the.\t\\\"You\tain't\tbuilt\tfor\twings--no\tman\tis.\tYou know\twhat\ta\tgrist\tof\tyears\tit\ttook\tyou\tto\tcome\there\tfrom\tthe\tearth--and\tyet\tyou were\t booming\t along\t faster\t than\t any\t cannon-ball\t could\t go.\t Suppose\t you\t had\t to fly\t that\t distance\t with\t your\t wings--wouldn't\t eternity\t have\t been\t over\t before\t you got\t here?\t Certainly.\t Well,\t angels\t have\t to\t go\t to\t the\t earth\t every\t day--millions\t of them--to\tappear\tin\tvisions\tto\tdying\tchildren\tand\tgood\tpeople,\tyou\tknow--it's\tthe heft\tof\ttheir\tbusiness.\tThey\tappear\twith\ttheir\twings,\tof\tcourse,\tbecause\tthey\tare on\t official\t service,\t and\t because\t the\t dying\t persons\t wouldn't\t know\t they\t were angels\t if\t they\t hadn't\t wings--but\t do\t you\t reckon\t they\t fly\t with\t them?\t It\t stands\t to reason\tthey\tdon't.\tThe\twings\twould\twear\tout\tbefore\tthey\tgot\thalf-way;\teven\tthe pinfeathers\t would\t be\t gone;\t the\t wing\t frames\t would\t be\t as\t bare\t as\t kite\t sticks before\t the\t paper\t is\t pasted\t on.\t The\t distances\t in\t heaven\t are\t billions\t of\t times greater;\tangels\thave\tto\tgo\tall\tover\theaven\tevery\tday;\tcould\tthey\tdo\tit\twith\ttheir wings\t alone?\t No,\t indeed;\t they\t wear\t the\t wings\t for\t style,\t but\t they\t travel\t any distance\tin\tan\tinstant\tby\twishing.\tThe\twishing-carpet\tof\tthe\tArabian\tNights\twas a\t sensible\t idea--but\t our\t earthly\t idea\t of\t angels\t flying\t these\t awful\t distances\t with","their\tclumsy\twings\twas\tfoolish. \\\"Our\tyoung\tsaints,\tof\tboth\tsexes,\twear\twings\tall\tthe\ttime--blazing\tred\tones, and\tblue\tand\tgreen,\tand\tgold,\tand\tvariegated,\tand\trainbowed,\tand\tring-streaked- and-striped\t ones--and\t nobody\t finds\t fault.\t It\t is\t suitable\t to\t their\t time\t of\t life.\t The things\t are\t beautiful,\t and\t they\t set\t the\t young\t people\t off.\t They\t are\t the\t most striking\tand\tlovely\tpart\tof\ttheir\toutfit--a\thalo\tdon't\tbegin.\\\" \\\"Well,\\\"\t says\t I,\t \\\"I've\t tucked\t mine\t away\t in\t the\t cupboard,\t and\t I\t allow\t to\t let them\tlay\tthere\ttill\tthere's\tmud.\\\" \\\"Yes--or\ta\treception.\\\" \\\"What's\tthat?\\\" \\\"Well,\t you\t can\t see\t one\t to-night\t if\t you\t want\t to.\t There's\t a\t barkeeper\t from Jersey\tCity\tgoing\tto\tbe\treceived.\\\" \\\"Go\ton--tell\tme\tabout\tit.\\\" \\\"This\t barkeeper\t got\t converted\t at\t a\t Moody\t and\t Sankey\t meeting,\t in\t New York,\t and\t started\t home\t on\t the\t ferryboat,\t and\t there\t was\t a\t collision\t and\t he\t got drowned.\t He\t is\t of\t a\t class\t that\t thinks\t all\t heaven\t goes\t wild\t with\t joy\t when\t a particularly\t hard\t lot\t like\t him\t is\t saved;\t they\t think\t all\t heaven\t turns\t out hosannahing\tto\twelcome\tthem;\tthey\tthink\tthere\tisn't\tanything\ttalked\tabout\tin\tthe realms\tof\tthe\tblest\tbut\ttheir\tcase,\tfor\tthat\tday.\tThis\tbarkeeper\tthinks\tthere\thasn't been\t such\t another\t stir\t here\t in\t years,\t as\t his\t coming\t is\t going\t to\t raise.--\t And\t I've always\t noticed\t this\t peculiarity\t about\t a\t dead\t barkeeper--he\t not\t only\t expects\t all hands\tto\tturn\tout\twhen\the\tarrives,\tbut\the\texpects\tto\tbe\treceived\twith\ta\ttorchlight procession.\\\" \\\"I\treckon\the\tis\tdisappointed,\tthen.\\\" \\\"No,\the\tisn't.\tNo\tman\tis\tallowed\tto\tbe\tdisappointed\there.\tWhatever\the\twants, when\t he\t comes--that\t is,\t any\t reasonable\t and\t unsacrilegious\t thing--he\t can\t have. There's\talways\ta\tfew\tmillions\tor\tbillions\tof\tyoung\tfolks\taround\twho\tdon't\twant any\t better\t entertainment\t than\t to\t fill\t up\t their\t lungs\t and\t swarm\t out\t with\t their torches\t and\t have\t a\t high\t time\t over\t a\t barkeeper.\t It\t tickles\t the\t barkeeper\t till\t he can't\trest,\tit\tmakes\ta\tcharming\tlark\tfor\tthe\tyoung\tfolks,\tit\tdon't\tdo\tanybody\tany harm,\t it\t don't\t cost\t a\t rap,\t and\t it\t keeps\t up\t the\t place's\t reputation\t for\t making\t all comers\thappy\tand\tcontent.\\\" \\\"Very\tgood.\tI'll\tbe\ton\thand\tand\tsee\tthem\tland\tthe\tbarkeeper.\\\" \\\"It\t is\t manners\t to\t go\t in\t full\t dress.\t You\t want\t to\t wear\t your\t wings,\t you\t know, and\tyour\tother\tthings.\\\" \\\"Which\tones?\\\" \\\"Halo,\tand\tharp,\tand\tpalm\tbranch,\tand\tall\tthat.\\\"","\\\"Well,\\\"\tsays\tI,\t\\\"I\treckon\tI\tought\tto\tbe\tashamed\tof\tmyself,\tbut\tthe\tfact\tis\tI\tleft them\tlaying\taround\tthat\tday\tI\tresigned\tfrom\tthe\tchoir.\tI\thaven't\tgot\ta\trag\tto\twear but\tthis\trobe\tand\tthe\twings.\\\" \\\"That's\t all\t right.\t You'll\t find\t they've\t been\t raked\t up\t and\t saved\t for\t you.\t Send for\tthem.\\\" \\\"I'll\t do\t it,\t Sandy.\t But\t what\t was\t it\t you\t was\t saying\t about\t unsacrilegious things,\twhich\tpeople\texpect\tto\tget,\tand\twill\tbe\tdisappointed\tabout?\\\" \\\"Oh,\t there\t are\t a\t lot\t of\t such\t things\t that\t people\t expect\t and\t don't\t get.\t For instance,\tthere's\ta\tBrooklyn\tpreacher\tby\tthe\tname\tof\tTalmage,\twho\tis\tlaying\tup\ta considerable\t disappointment\t for\t himself.\t He\t says,\t every\t now\t and\t then\t in\t his sermons,\tthat\tthe\tfirst\tthing\the\tdoes\twhen\the\tgets\tto\theaven,\twill\tbe\tto\tfling\this arms\t around\t Abraham,\t Isaac\t and\t Jacob,\t and\t kiss\t them\t and\t weep\t on\t them. There's\tmillions\tof\tpeople\tdown\tthere\ton\tearth\tthat\tare\tpromising\tthemselves\tthe same\tthing.\tAs\tmany\tas\tsixty\tthousand\tpeople\tarrive\there\tevery\tsingle\tday,\tthat want\t to\t run\t straight\t to\t Abraham,\t Isaac\t and\t Jacob,\t and\t hug\t them\t and\t weep\t on them.\t Now\t mind\t you,\t sixty\t thousand\t a\t day\t is\t a\t pretty\t heavy\t contract\t for\t those old\tpeople.\tIf\tthey\twere\ta\tmind\tto\tallow\tit,\tthey\twouldn't\tever\thave\tanything\tto do,\t year\t in\t and\t year\t out,\t but\t stand\t up\t and\t be\t hugged\t and\t wept\t on\t thirty-two hours\tin\tthe\ttwenty-four.\tThey\twould\tbe\ttired\tout\tand\tas\twet\tas\tmuskrats\tall\tthe time.\t What\t would\t heaven\t be,\t to\t them?\t It\t would\t be\t a\t mighty\t good\t place\t to\t get out\t of--you\t know\t that,\t yourself.\t Those\t are\t kind\t and\t gentle\t old\t Jews,\t but\t they ain't\t any\t fonder\t of\t kissing\t the\t emotional\t high-lights\t of\t Brooklyn\t than\t you\t be. You\tmark\tmy\twords,\tMr.\tT.'s\tendearments\tare\tgoing\tto\tbe\tdeclined,\twith\tthanks. There\tare\tlimits\tto\tthe\tprivileges\tof\tthe\telect,\teven\tin\theaven.\tWhy,\tif\tAdam\twas to\tshow\thimself\tto\tevery\tnew\tcomer\tthat\twants\tto\tcall\tand\tgaze\tat\thim\tand\tstrike him\t for\t his\t autograph,\t he\t would\t never\t have\t time\t to\t do\t anything\t else\t but\t just that.\tTalmage\thas\tsaid\the\tis\tgoing\tto\tgive\tAdam\tsome\tof\this\tattentions,\tas\twell as\tA.,\tI.\tand\tJ.\tBut\the\twill\thave\tto\tchange\this\tmind\tabout\tthat.\\\" \\\"Do\tyou\tthink\tTalmage\twill\treally\tcome\there?\\\" \\\"Why,\tcertainly,\the\twill;\tbut\tdon't\tyou\tbe\talarmed;\the\twill\trun\twith\this\town kind,\t and\t there's\t plenty\t of\t them.\t That\t is\t the\t main\t charm\t of\t heaven--there's\t all kinds\t here--which\t wouldn't\t be\t the\t case\t if\t you\t let\t the\t preachers\t tell\t it.\t Anybody can\t find\t the\t sort\t he\t prefers,\t here,\t and\t he\t just\t lets\t the\t others\t alone,\t and\t they\t let him\t alone.\t When\t the\t Deity\t builds\t a\t heaven,\t it\t is\t built\t right,\t and\t on\t a\t liberal plan.\\\" Sandy\t sent\t home\t for\t his\t things,\t and\t I\t sent\t for\t mine,\t and\t about\t nine\t in\t the evening\twe\tbegun\tto\tdress.\tSandy\tsays,--","\\\"This\t is\t going\t to\t be\t a\t grand\t time\t for\t you,\t Stormy.\t Like\t as\t not\t some\t of\t the patriarchs\twill\tturn\tout.\\\" \\\"No,\tbut\twill\tthey?\\\" \\\"Like\t as\t not.\t Of\t course\t they\t are\t pretty\t exclusive.\t They\t hardly\t ever\t show themselves\t to\t the\t common\t public.\t I\t believe\t they\t never\t turn\t out\t except\t for\t an eleventh-hour\t convert.\t They\t wouldn't\t do\t it\t then,\t only\t earthly\t tradition\t makes\t a grand\tshow\tpretty\tnecessary\ton\tthat\tkind\tof\tan\toccasion.\\\" \\\"Do\tthey\tall\tturn\tout,\tSandy?\\\" \\\"Who?--all\tthe\tpatriarchs?\tOh,\tno--hardly\tever\tmore\tthan\ta\tcouple.\tYou\twill be\t here\t fifty\t thousand\t years--maybe\t more--before\t you\t get\t a\t glimpse\t of\t all\t the patriarchs\tand\tprophets.\tSince\tI\thave\tbeen\there,\tJob\thas\tbeen\tto\tthe\tfront\tonce, and\tonce\tHam\tand\tJeremiah\tboth\tat\tthe\tsame\ttime.\tBut\tthe\tfinest\tthing\tthat\thas happened\t in\t my\t day\t was\t a\t year\t or\t so\t ago;\t that\t was\t Charles\t Peace's\t reception-- him\t they\t called\t 'the\t Bannercross\t Murderer'--an\t Englishman.\t There\t were\t four patriarchs\t and\t two\t prophets\t on\t the\t Grand\t Stand\t that\t time--there\t hasn't\t been anything\t like\t it\t since\t Captain\t Kidd\t came;\t Abel\t was\t there--the\t first\t time\t in twelve\t hundred\t years.\t A\t report\t got\t around\t that\t Adam\t was\t coming;\t well,\t of course,\t Abel\t was\tenough\t to\tbring\t a\t crowd,\t all\t by\t himself,\t but\t there\t is\tnobody that\t can\t draw\t like\t Adam.\t It\t was\t a\t false\t report,\t but\t it\t got\t around,\t anyway,\t as\t I say,\tand\tit\twill\tbe\ta\tlong\tday\tbefore\tI\tsee\tthe\tlike\tof\tit\tagain.\tThe\treception\twas in\tthe\tEnglish\tdepartment,\tof\tcourse,\twhich\tis\teight\thundred\tand\televen\tmillion miles\t from\t the\t New\t Jersey\t line.\t I\t went,\t along\t with\t a\t good\t many\t of\t my neighbors,\t and\t it\t was\t a\t sight\t to\t see,\t I\t can\t tell\t you.\t Flocks\t came\t from\t all\t the departments.\t I\t saw\t Esquimaux\t there,\t and\t Tartars,\t Negroes,\t Chinamen--people from\t everywhere.\t You\tsee\t a\t mixture\tlike\t that\t in\tthe\t Grand\t Choir,\tthe\tfirst\t day you\t land\t here,\t but\t you\t hardly\t ever\t see\t it\t again.\t There\t were\t billions\t of\t people; when\t they\t were\t singing\t or\t hosannahing,\t the\t noise\t was\t wonderful;\t and\t even when\t their\t tongues\t were\t still\t the\t drumming\t of\t the\t wings\t was\t nearly\t enough\t to burst\t your\t head,\t for\t all\t the\t sky\t was\t as\t thick\t as\t if\t it\t was\t snowing\t angels. Although\tAdam\twas\tnot\tthere,\tit\twas\ta\tgreat\ttime\tanyway,\tbecause\twe\thad\tthree archangels\ton\tthe\tGrand\tStand--it\tis\ta\tseldom\tthing\tthat\teven\tone\tcomes\tout.\\\" \\\"What\tdid\tthey\tlook\tlike,\tSandy?\\\" \\\"Well,\t they\t had\t shining\t faces,\t and\t shining\t robes,\t and\t wonderful\t rainbow wings,\tand\tthey\tstood\teighteen\tfeet\thigh,\tand\twore\tswords,\tand\theld\ttheir\theads up\tin\ta\tnoble\tway,\tand\tlooked\tlike\tsoldiers.\\\" \\\"Did\tthey\thave\thalos?\\\" \\\"No--anyway,\t not\t the\t hoop\t kind.\t The\t archangels\t and\t the\t upper-class","patriarchs\twear\ta\tfiner\tthing\tthan\tthat.\tIt\tis\ta\tround,\tsolid,\tsplendid\tglory\tof\tgold, that\tis\tblinding\tto\tlook\tat.\tYou\thave\toften\tseen\ta\tpatriarch\tin\ta\tpicture,\ton\tearth, with\t that\t thing\t on--you\t remember\t it?--he\t looks\t as\t if\t he\t had\t his\t head\t in\t a\t brass platter.\tThat\tdon't\tgive\tyou\tthe\tright\tidea\tof\tit\tat\tall--it\tis\tmuch\tmore\tshining\tand beautiful.\\\" \\\"Did\tyou\ttalk\twith\tthose\tarchangels\tand\tpatriarchs,\tSandy? \\\"Who--I?\t Why,\t what\t can\t you\t be\t thinking\t about,\t Stormy?\t I\t ain't\t worthy\t to speak\tto\tsuch\tas\tthey.\\\" \\\"Is\tTalmage?\\\" \\\"Of\tcourse\tnot.\tYou\thave\tgot\tthe\tsame\tmixed-up\tidea\tabout\tthese\tthings\tthat everybody\thas\tdown\tthere.\tI\thad\tit\tonce,\tbut\tI\tgot\tover\tit.\tDown\tthere\tthey\ttalk of\tthe\theavenly\tKing--and\tthat\tis\tright--but\tthen\tthey\tgo\tright\ton\tspeaking\tas\tif this\twas\ta\trepublic\tand\teverybody\twas\ton\ta\tdead\tlevel\twith\teverybody\telse,\tand privileged\tto\tfling\this\tarms\taround\tanybody\the\tcomes\tacross,\tand\tbe\thail-fellow- well-met\t with\t all\t the\t elect,\t from\t the\t highest\t down.\t How\t tangled\t up\t and\t absurd that\tis!\tHow\tare\tyou\tgoing\tto\thave\ta\trepublic\tunder\ta\tking?\tHow\tare\tyou\tgoing to\thave\ta\trepublic\tat\tall,\twhere\tthe\thead\tof\tthe\tgovernment\tis\tabsolute,\tholds\this place\tforever,\tand\thas\tno\tparliament,\tno\tcouncil\tto\tmeddle\tor\tmake\tin\this\taffairs, nobody\tvoted\tfor,\tnobody\telected,\tnobody\tin\tthe\twhole\tuniverse\twith\ta\tvoice\tin the\tgovernment,\tnobody\tasked\tto\ttake\ta\thand\tin\tits\tmatters,\tand\tnobody\tallowed to\tdo\tit?\tFine\trepublic,\tain't\tit?\\\" \\\"Well,\tyes--it\tis\ta\tlittle\tdifferent\tfrom\tthe\tidea\tI\thad--but\tI\tthought\tI\tmight\tgo around\t and\t get\t acquainted\t with\t the\t grandees,\t anyway--not\t exactly\t splice\t the main-brace\twith\tthem,\tyou\tknow,\tbut\tshake\thands\tand\tpass\tthe\ttime\tof\tday.\\\" \\\"Could\tTom,\tDick\tand\tHarry\tcall\ton\tthe\tCabinet\tof\tRussia\tand\tdo\tthat?--on Prince\tGortschakoff,\tfor\tinstance?\\\" \\\"I\treckon\tnot,\tSandy.\\\" \\\"Well,\t this\t is\t Russia--only\t more\t so.\t There's\t not\t the\t shadow\t of\t a\t republic about\tit\tanywhere.\tThere\tare\tranks,\there.\tThere\tare\tviceroys,\tprinces,\tgovernors, sub-governors,\t sub-sub-governors,\t and\t a\t hundred\t orders\t of\t nobility,\t grading along\tdown\tfrom\tgrand-ducal\tarchangels,\tstage\tby\tstage,\ttill\tthe\tgeneral\tlevel\tis struck,\t where\t there\t ain't\t any\t titles.\t Do\t you\t know\t what\t a\t prince\t of\t the\t blood\t is, on\tearth?\\\" \\\"No.\\\" \\\"Well,\ta\tprince\tof\tthe\tblood\tdon't\tbelong\tto\tthe\troyal\tfamily\texactly,\tand\the don't\t belong\t to\t the\t mere\t nobility\t of\t the\t kingdom;\t he\t is\t lower\t than\t the\t one,\t and higher\tthan\tt'other.\tThat's\tabout\tthe\tposition\tof\tthe\tpatriarchs\tand\tprophets\there.","There's\t some\t mighty\t high\t nobility\t here--people\t that\t you\t and\t I\t ain't\t worthy\t to polish\tsandals\tfor--and\tthey\tain't\tworthy\tto\tpolish\tsandals\tfor\tthe\tpatriarchs\tand prophets.\t That\t gives\t you\t a\t kind\t of\t an\t idea\t of\t their\t rank,\t don't\t it?\t You\t begin\t to see\thow\thigh\tup\tthey\tare,\tdon't\tyou?\tJust\tto\tget\ta\ttwo-minute\tglimpse\tof\tone\tof them\tis\ta\tthing\tfor\ta\tbody\tto\tremember\tand\ttell\tabout\tfor\ta\tthousand\tyears.\tWhy, Captain,\tjust\tthink\tof\tthis:\tif\tAbraham\twas\tto\tset\this\tfoot\tdown\there\tby\tthis\tdoor, there\t would\tbe\t a\trailing\tset\t up\t around\tthat\t foot-track\t right\taway,\t and\t a\t shelter put\tover\tit,\tand\tpeople\twould\tflock\there\tfrom\tall\tover\theaven,\tfor\thundreds\tand hundreds\tof\tyears,\tto\tlook\tat\tit.\tAbraham\tis\tone\tof\tthe\tparties\tthat\tMr.\tTalmage, of\t Brooklyn,\t is\t going\t to\t embrace,\t and\t kiss,\t and\t weep\t on,\t when\t he\t comes.\t He wants\t to\t lay\t in\t a\t good\t stock\t of\t tears,\t you\t know,\t or\t five\t to\t one\t he\t will\t go\t dry before\the\tgets\ta\tchance\tto\tdo\tit.\\\" \\\"Sandy,\\\"\t says\t I,\t \\\"I\t had\t an\t idea\t that\t I\t was\t going\t to\t be\t equal\t with\t everybody here,\ttoo,\tbut\tI\twill\tlet\tthat\tdrop.\tIt\tdon't\tmatter,\tand\tI\tam\tplenty\thappy\tenough anyway.\\\" \\\"Captain,\t you\t are\t happier\t than\t you\t would\t be,\t the\t other\t way.\t These\t old patriarchs\t and\t prophets\t have\tgot\tages\t the\tstart\tof\t you;\tthey\tknow\tmore\t in\ttwo minutes\tthan\tyou\tknow\tin\ta\tyear.\tDid\tyou\tever\ttry\tto\thave\ta\tsociable\timproving- time\t discussing\t winds,\t and\t currents\t and\t variations\t of\t compass\t with\t an undertaker?\\\" \\\"I\tget\tyour\tidea,\tSandy.\tHe\tcouldn't\tinterest\tme.\tHe\twould\tbe\tan\tignoramus in\tsuch\tthings--he\twould\tbore\tme,\tand\tI\twould\tbore\thim.\\\" \\\"You\thave\tgot\tit.\tYou\twould\tbore\tthe\tpatriarchs\twhen\tyou\ttalked,\tand\twhen they\t talked\t they\t would\t shoot\t over\t your\t head.\t By\t and\t by\t you\t would\t say,\t 'Good morning,\t your\t Eminence,\t I\t will\t call\t again'--but\t you\t wouldn't.\t Did\t you\t ever\t ask the\tslush-boy\tto\tcome\tup\tin\tthe\tcabin\tand\ttake\tdinner\twith\tyou?\\\" \\\"I\tget\tyour\tdrift\tagain,\tSandy.\tI\twouldn't\tbe\tused\tto\tsuch\tgrand\tpeople\tas\tthe patriarchs\t and\t prophets,\t and\t I\t would\t be\t sheepish\t and\t tongue-tied\t in\t their company,\t and\t mighty\t glad\t to\t get\t out\t of\t it.\t Sandy,\t which\t is\t the\t highest\t rank, patriarch\tor\tprophet?\\\" \\\"Oh,\tthe\tprophets\thold\tover\tthe\tpatriarchs.\tThe\tnewest\tprophet,\teven,\tis\tof\ta sight\tmore\tconsequence\tthan\tthe\toldest\tpatriarch.\tYes,\tsir,\tAdam\thimself\thas\tto walk\tbehind\tShakespeare.\\\" \\\"Was\tShakespeare\ta\tprophet?\\\" \\\"Of\tcourse\the\twas;\tand\tso\twas\tHomer,\tand\theaps\tmore.\tBut\tShakespeare\tand the\t rest\t have\t to\t walk\t behind\t a\t common\t tailor\t from\t Tennessee,\t by\t the\t name\t of Billings;\t and\t behind\t a\t horse-doctor\t named\t Sakka,\t from\t Afghanistan.\t Jeremiah,","and\tBillings\tand\tBuddha\twalk\ttogether,\tside\tby\tside,\tright\tbehind\ta\tcrowd\tfrom planets\t not\t in\t our\t astronomy;\t next\t come\t a\t dozen\t or\t two\t from\t Jupiter\t and\t other worlds;\t next\t come\t Daniel,\t and\t Sakka\t and\t Confucius;\t next\t a\t lot\t from\t systems outside\tof\tours;\tnext\tcome\tEzekiel,\tand\tMahomet,\tZoroaster,\tand\ta\tknifegrinder from\t ancient\t Egypt;\t then\t there\t is\t a\t long\t string,\t and\t after\t them,\t away\t down toward\t the\t bottom,\t come\t Shakespeare\t and\t Homer,\t and\t a\t shoemaker\t named Marais,\tfrom\tthe\tback\tsettlements\tof\tFrance.\\\" \\\"Have\tthey\treally\trung\tin\tMahomet\tand\tall\tthose\tother\theathens?\\\" \\\"Yes--they\tall\thad\ttheir\tmessage,\tand\tthey\tall\tget\ttheir\treward.\tThe\tman\twho don't\tget\this\treward\ton\tearth,\tneedn't\tbother--he\twill\tget\tit\there,\tsure.\\\" \\\"But\t why\t did\t they\t throw\t off\t on\t Shakespeare,\t that\t way,\t and\t put\t him\t away down\t there\t below\t those\t shoemakers\t and\thorse-doctors\tand\tknifegrinders--a\t lot of\tpeople\tnobody\tever\theard\tof?\\\" \\\"That\t is\t the\t heavenly\t justice\t of\t it--they\t warn't\t rewarded\t according\t to\t their deserts,\ton\tearth,\tbut\there\tthey\tget\ttheir\trightful\trank.\tThat\ttailor\tBillings,\tfrom Tennessee,\twrote\tpoetry\tthat\tHomer\tand\tShakespeare\tcouldn't\tbegin\tto\tcome\tup to;\tbut\tnobody\twould\tprint\tit,\tnobody\tread\tit\tbut\this\tneighbors,\tan\tignorant\tlot, and\t they\t laughed\t at\t it.\t Whenever\t the\t village\t had\t a\t drunken\t frolic\t and\t a\t dance, they\twould\tdrag\thim\tin\tand\tcrown\thim\twith\tcabbage\tleaves,\tand\tpretend\tto\tbow down\tto\thim;\tand\tone\tnight\twhen\the\twas\tsick\tand\tnearly\tstarved\tto\tdeath,\tthey had\thim\tout\tand\tcrowned\thim,\tand\tthen\tthey\trode\thim\ton\ta\trail\tabout\tthe\tvillage, and\teverybody\tfollowed\talong,\tbeating\ttin\tpans\tand\tyelling.\tWell,\the\tdied\tbefore morning.\t He\t wasn't\t ever\t expecting\t to\t go\t to\t heaven,\t much\t less\t that\t there\t was going\t to\t be\t any\t fuss\t made\t over\t him,\t so\t I\t reckon\t he\t was\t a\t good\t deal\t surprised when\tthe\treception\tbroke\ton\thim.\\\" \\\"Was\tyou\tthere,\tSandy?\\\" \\\"Bless\tyou,\tno!\\\" \\\"Why?\tDidn't\tyou\tknow\tit\twas\tgoing\tto\tcome\toff?\\\" \\\"Well,\t I\t judge\t I\t did.\t It\t was\t the\t talk\t of\t these\t realms--not\t for\t a\t day,\t like\t this barkeeper\tbusiness,\tbut\tfor\ttwenty\tyears\tbefore\tthe\tman\tdied.\\\" \\\"Why\tthe\tmischief\tdidn't\tyou\tgo,\tthen?\\\" \\\"Now\thow\tyou\ttalk!\tThe\tlike\tof\tme\tgo\tmeddling\taround\tat\tthe\treception\tof\ta prophet?\tA\tmudsill\tlike\tme\ttrying\tto\tpush\tin\tand\thelp\treceive\tan\tawful\tgrandee like\tEdward\tJ.\tBillings?\tWhy,\tI\tshould\thave\tbeen\tlaughed\tat\tfor\ta\tbillion\tmiles around.\tI\tshouldn't\tever\theard\tthe\tlast\tof\tit.\\\" \\\"Well,\twho\tdid\tgo,\tthen?\\\" \\\"Mighty\tfew\tpeople\tthat\tyou\tand\tI\twill\tever\tget\ta\tchance\tto\tsee,\tCaptain.\tNot","a\tsolitary\tcommoner\tever\thas\tthe\tluck\tto\tsee\ta\treception\tof\ta\tprophet,\tI\tcan\ttell you.\tAll\tthe\tnobility,\tand\tall\tthe\tpatriarchs\tand\tprophets--every\tlast\tone\tof\tthem-- and\t all\t the\t archangels,\t and\t all\t the\t princes\t and\t governors\t and\t viceroys,\t were there,--and\t no\t small\t fry--not\t a\t single\t one.\t And\t mind\t you,\t I'm\t not\t talking\t about only\tthe\tgrandees\tfrom\tour\tworld,\tbut\tthe\tprinces\tand\tpatriarchs\tand\tso\ton\tfrom all\t the\t worlds\t that\t shine\t in\t our\t sky,\t and\t from\t billions\t more\t that\t belong\t in systems\t upon\t systems\t away\t outside\t of\t the\t one\t our\t sun\t is\t in.\t There\t were\t some prophets\t and\t patriarchs\t there\t that\t ours\t ain't\t a\t circumstance\t to,\t for\t rank\t and illustriousness\tand\tall\tthat.\tSome\twere\tfrom\tJupiter\tand\tother\tworlds\tin\tour\town system,\t but\t the\t most\t celebrated\t were\t three\t poets,\t Saa,\t Bo\t and\t Soof,\t from\t great planets\t in\t three\t different\t and\t very\t remote\t systems.\t These\t three\t names\t are common\tand\tfamiliar\tin\tevery\tnook\tand\tcorner\tof\theaven,\tclear\tfrom\tone\tend\tof it\t to\t the\t other--fully\t as\t well\t known\t as\t the\t eighty\t Supreme\t Archangels,\t in\t fact-- whereas\t our\t Moses,\t and\t Adam,\t and\t the\t rest,\t have\t not\t been\t heard\t of\t outside\t of our\t world's\t little\t corner\t of\t heaven,\t except\t by\t a\t few\t very\t learned\t men\t scattered here\t and\t there--and\t they\t always\t spell\t their\t names\t wrong,\t and\t get\t the performances\t of\t one\t mixed\t up\t with\t the\t doings\t of\t another,\t and\t they\t almost always\tlocate\tthem\tsimply\tin\tour\tsolar\tsystem,\tand\tthink\tthat\tis\tenough\twithout going\t into\t little\t details\t such\t as\t naming\t the\t particular\t world\t they\t are\t from.\t It\t is like\t a\t learned\t Hindoo\t showing\t off\t how\t much\t he\t knows\t by\t saying\t Longfellow lived\tin\tthe\tUnited\tStates--as\tif\the\tlived\tall\tover\tthe\tUnited\tStates,\tand\tas\tif\tthe country\t was\t so\t small\t you\t couldn't\t throw\t a\t brick\t there\t without\t hitting\t him. Between\tyou\tand\tme,\tit\tdoes\tgravel\tme,\tthe\tcool\tway\tpeople\tfrom\tthose\tmonster worlds\toutside\tour\tsystem\tsnub\tour\tlittle\tworld,\tand\teven\tour\tsystem.\tOf\tcourse we\tthink\ta\tgood\tdeal\tof\tJupiter,\tbecause\tour\tworld\tis\tonly\ta\tpotato\tto\tit,\tfor\tsize; but\tthen\tthere\tare\tworlds\tin\tother\tsystems\tthat\tJupiter\tisn't\teven\ta\tmustard-seed to--like\t the\t planet\t Goobra,\t for\t instance,\t which\t you\t couldn't\t squeeze\t inside\t the orbit\tof\tHaley's\tcomet\twithout\tstraining\tthe\trivets.\tTourists\tfrom\tGoobra\t(I\tmean parties\tthat\tlived\tand\tdied\tthere--natives)\tcome\there,\tnow\tand\tthen,\tand\tinquire about\t our\t world,\t and\t when\t they\t find\t out\t it\t is\t so\t little\t that\t a\t streak\t of\t lightning can\t flash\t clear\t around\t it\t in\t the\t eighth\t of\t a\t second,\t they\t have\t to\t lean\t up\t against something\tto\tlaugh.\tThen\tthey\tscrew\ta\tglass\tinto\ttheir\teye\tand\tgo\tto\texamining us,\tas\tif\twe\twere\ta\tcurious\tkind\tof\tforeign\tbug,\tor\tsomething\tof\tthat\tsort.\tOne\tof them\tasked\tme\thow\tlong\tour\tday\twas;\tand\twhen\tI\ttold\thim\tit\twas\ttwelve\thours long,\t as\t a\t general\t thing,\t he\t asked\t me\t if\t people\t where\t I\t was\t from\t considered\t it worth\twhile\tto\tget\tup\tand\twash\tfor\tsuch\ta\tday\tas\tthat.\tThat\tis\tthe\tway\twith\tthose Goobra\tpeople--they\tcan't\tseem\tto\tlet\ta\tchance\tgo\tby\tto\tthrow\tit\tin\tyour\tface\tthat","their\t day\t is\t three\t hundred\t and\t twenty-two\t of\t our\t years\t long.\t This\t young\t snob was\tjust\tof\tage--he\twas\tsix\tor\tseven\tthousand\tof\this\tdays\told--say\ttwo\tmillion\tof our\t years--and\t he\t had\t all\t the\t puppy\t airs\t that\t belong\t to\t that\t time\t of\t life--that turning-point\t when\t a\t person\t has\t got\t over\t being\t a\t boy\t and\t yet\t ain't\t quite\t a\t man exactly.\t If\t it\t had\t been\t anywhere\t else\t but\t in\t heaven,\t I\t would\t have\t given\t him\t a piece\t of\t my\t mind.\t Well,\t anyway,\t Billings\t had\t the\t grandest\t reception\t that\t has been\t seen\t in\t thousands\t of\t centuries,\t and\t I\t think\t it\t will\t have\t a\t good\t effect.\t His name\t will\t be\t carried\t pretty\t far,\t and\t it\t will\t make\t our\t system\t talked\t about,\t and maybe\tour\tworld,\ttoo,\tand\traise\tus\tin\tthe\trespect\tof\tthe\tgeneral\tpublic\tof\theaven. Why,\t look\t here--Shakespeare\t walked\t backwards\t before\t that\t tailor\t from Tennessee,\t and\t scattered\t flowers\t for\t him\t to\t walk\t on,\t and\t Homer\t stood\t behind his\t chair\t and\t waited\t on\t him\t at\t the\t banquet.\t Of\t course\t that\t didn't\t go\t for\t much there,\tamongst\tall\tthose\tbig\tforeigners\tfrom\tother\tsystems,\tas\tthey\thadn't\theard of\tShakespeare\tor\tHomer\teither,\tbut\tit\twould\tamount\tto\tconsiderable\tdown\tthere on\tour\tlittle\tearth\tif\tthey\tcould\tknow\tabout\tit.\tI\twish\tthere\twas\tsomething\tin\tthat miserable\t spirtitualism,\t so\t we\t could\t send\t them\t word.\t That\t Tennessee\t village would\t set\t up\t a\t monument\t to\t Billings,\t then,\t and\t his\t autograph\t would\t outsell Satan's.\t Well,\t they\t had\t grand\t times\t at\t that\t reception--a\t small-fry\t noble\t from Hoboken\ttold\tme\tall\tabout\tit--Sir\tRichard\tDuffer,\tBaronet.\\\" \\\"What,\tSandy,\ta\tnobleman\tfrom\tHoboken?\tHow\tis\tthat?\\\" \\\"Easy\tenough.\tDuffer\tkept\ta\tsausage-shop\tand\tnever\tsaved\ta\tcent\tin\this\tlife because\t he\t used\t to\t give\t all\t his\t spare\t meat\t to\t the\t poor,\t in\t a\t quiet\t way.\t Not tramps,--no,\tthe\tother\tsort--the\tsort\tthat\twill\tstarve\tbefore\tthey\twill\tbeg--honest square\tpeople\tout\tof\twork.\tDick\tused\tto\twatch\thungry-looking\tmen\tand\twomen and\t children,\t and\t track\t them\t home,\t and\t find\t out\t all\t about\t them\t from\t the neighbors,\t and\t then\t feed\t them\t and\t find\t them\t work.\t As\t nobody\t ever\t saw\t him give\tanything\tto\tanybody,\the\thad\tthe\treputation\tof\tbeing\tmean;\the\tdied\twith\tit, too,\t and\t everybody\t said\t it\t was\t a\t good\t riddance;\t but\t the\t minute\t he\t landed\t here, they\t made\t him\t a\t baronet,\t and\t the\t very\t first\t words\t Dick\t the\t sausage-maker\t of Hoboken\t heard\t when\t he\t stepped\t upon\t the\t heavenly\t shore\t were,\t 'Welcome,\t Sir Richard\t Duffer!'\t It\t surprised\t him\t some,\t because\t he\t thought\t he\t had\t reasons\t to believe\the\twas\tpointed\tfor\ta\twarmer\tclimate\tthan\tthis\tone.\\\" \t All\t of\t a\t sudden\t the\t whole\t region\t fairly\t rocked\t under\t the\t crash\t of\t eleven hundred\tand\tone\tthunder\tblasts,\tall\tlet\toff\tat\tonce,\tand\tSandy\tsays,--","\\\"There,\tthat's\tfor\tthe\tbarkeep.\\\" I\tjumped\tup\tand\tsays,-- \\\"Then\tlet's\tbe\tmoving\talong,\tSandy;\twe\tdon't\twant\tto\tmiss\tany\tof\tthis\tthing, you\tknow.\\\" \\\"Keep\tyour\tseat,\\\"\the\tsays;\t\\\"he\tis\tonly\tjust\ttelegraphed,\tthat\tis\tall.\\\" \\\"How?\\\" \\\"That\tblast\tonly\tmeans\tthat\the\thas\tbeen\tsighted\tfrom\tthe\tsignal-station.\tHe\tis off\tSandy\tHook.\tThe\tcommittees\twill\tgo\tdown\tto\tmeet\thim,\tnow,\tand\tescort\thim in.\tThere\twill\tbe\tceremonies\tand\tdelays;\tthey\twon't\tbe\tcoming\tup\tthe\tBay\tfor\ta considerable\ttime,\tyet.\tIt\tis\tseveral\tbillion\tmiles\taway,\tanyway.\\\" \\\"I\t could\t have\t been\t a\t barkeeper\t and\t a\t hard\t lot\t just\t as\t well\t as\t not,\\\"\t says\t I, remembering\t the\t lonesome\t way\t I\t arrived,\t and\t how\t there\t wasn't\t any\t committee nor\tanything. \\\"I\t notice\t some\t regret\t in\t your\t voice,\\\"\t says\t Sandy,\t \\\"and\t it\t is\t natural\t enough; but\tlet\tbygones\tbe\tbygones;\tyou\twent\taccording\tto\tyour\tlights,\tand\tit\tis\ttoo\tlate now\tto\tmend\tthe\tthing.\\\" \\\"No,\tlet\tit\tslide,\tSandy,\tI\tdon't\tmind.\tBut\tyou've\tgot\ta\tSandy\tHook\there,\ttoo, have\tyou?\\\" \\\"We've\tgot\teverything\there,\tjust\tas\tit\tis\tbelow.\tAll\tthe\tStates\tand\tTerritories of\tthe\tUnion,\tand\tall\tthe\tkingdoms\tof\tthe\tearth\tand\tthe\tislands\tof\tthe\tsea\tare\tlaid out\t here\t just\t as\t they\t are\t on\t the\t globe--all\t the\t same\t shape\t they\t are\t down\t there, and\tall\tgraded\tto\tthe\trelative\tsize,\tonly\teach\tState\tand\trealm\tand\tisland\tis\ta\tgood many\tbillion\ttimes\tbigger\there\tthan\tit\tis\tbelow.\tThere\tgoes\tanother\tblast.\\\" \\\"What\tis\tthat\tone\tfor?\\\" \\\"That\t is\t only\t another\t fort\t answering\t the\t first\t one.\t They\t each\t fire\t eleven hundred\t and\t one\t thunder\t blasts\t at\t a\t single\t dash--it\t is\t the\t usual\t salute\t for\t an eleventh-hour\tguest;\ta\thundred\tfor\teach\thour\tand\tan\textra\tone\tfor\tthe\tguest's\tsex; if\tit\twas\ta\twoman\twe\twould\tknow\tit\tby\ttheir\tleaving\toff\tthe\textra\tgun.\\\" \\\"How\tdo\twe\tknow\tthere's\televen\thundred\tand\tone,\tSandy,\twhen\tthey\tall\tgo off\tat\tonce?--and\tyet\twe\tcertainly\tdo\tknow.\\\" \\\"Our\tintellects\tare\ta\tgood\tdeal\tsharpened\tup,\there,\tin\tsome\tways,\tand\tthat\tis one\tof\tthem.\tNumbers\tand\tsizes\tand\tdistances\tare\tso\tgreat,\there,\tthat\twe\thave\tto be\t made\t so\t we\t can\t feel\t them--our\t old\t ways\t of\t counting\t and\t measuring\t and ciphering\twouldn't\tever\tgive\tus\tan\tidea\tof\tthem,\tbut\twould\tonly\tconfuse\tus\tand oppress\tus\tand\tmake\tour\theads\tache.\\\" After\t some\t more\t talk\t about\t this,\t I\t says:\t \\\"Sandy,\t I\t notice\t that\t I\t hardly\t ever see\t a\t white\t angel;\t where\t I\t run\t across\t one\t white\t angel,\t I\t strike\t as\t many\t as\t a","hundred\t million\t copper-colored\t ones--people\t that\t can't\t speak\t English.\t How\t is that?\\\" \\\"Well,\t you\t will\t find\t it\t the\t same\t in\t any\t State\t or\t Territory\t of\t the\t American corner\t of\t heaven\t you\t choose\t to\t go\t to.\t I\t have\t shot\t along,\t a\t whole\t week\t on\t a stretch,\t and\t gone\t millions\t and\t millions\t of\t miles,\t through\t perfect\t swarms\t of angels,\t without\t ever\t seeing\t a\t single\t white\t one,\t or\t hearing\t a\t word\t I\t could understand.\tYou\tsee,\tAmerica\twas\toccupied\ta\tbillion\tyears\tand\tmore,\tby\tInjuns and\t Aztecs,\t and\t that\t sort\t of\t folks,\t before\t a\t white\t man\t ever\t set\t his\t foot\t in\t it. During\t the\t first\t three\t hundred\t years\t after\t Columbus's\t discovery,\t there\t wasn't ever\t more\t than\t one\t good\t lecture\t audience\t of\t white\t people,\t all\t put\t together,\t in America--I\t mean\t the\t whole\t thing,\t British\t Possessions\t and\t all;\t in\t the\t beginning of\tour\tcentury\tthere\twere\tonly\t6,000,000\tor\t7,000,000--say\tseven;\t12,000,000\tor 14,000,000\tin\t1825;\tsay\t23,000,000\tin\t1850;\t40,000,000\tin\t1875.\tOur\tdeath-rate has\talways\tbeen\t20\tin\t1000\tper\tannum.\tWell,\t140,000\tdied\tthe\tfirst\tyear\tof\tthe century;\t280,000\tthe\ttwenty-fifth\tyear;\t500,000\tthe\tfiftieth\tyear;\tabout\ta\tmillion the\t seventy-fifth\t year.\t Now\t I\t am\t going\t to\t be\t liberal\t about\t this\t thing,\t and consider\tthat\tfifty\tmillion\twhites\thave\tdied\tin\tAmerica\tfrom\tthe\tbeginning\tup\tto to-day--make\t it\t sixty,\t if\t you\t want\t to;\t make\t it\t a\t hundred\t million--it's\t no difference\t about\t a\t few\t millions\t one\t way\t or\t t'other.\t Well,\t now,\t you\t can\t see, yourself,\tthat\twhen\tyou\tcome\tto\tspread\ta\tlittle\tdab\tof\tpeople\tlike\tthat\tover\tthese hundreds\t of\t billions\t of\t miles\t of\t American\t territory\t here\t in\t heaven,\t it\t is\t like scattering\t a\t ten-cent\t box\t of\t homoeopathic\t pills\t over\t the\t Great\t Sahara\t and expecting\t to\t find\t them\t again.\t You\t can't\t expect\t us\t to\t amount\t to\t anything\t in heaven,\tand\twe\tdon't--now\tthat\tis\tthe\tsimple\tfact,\tand\twe\thave\tgot\tto\tdo\tthe\tbest we\tcan\twith\tit.\tThe\tlearned\tmen\tfrom\tother\tplanets\tand\tother\tsystems\tcome\there and\t hang\t around\t a\t while,\t when\t they\t are\t touring\t around\t the\t Kingdom,\t and\t then go\tback\tto\ttheir\town\tsection\tof\theaven\tand\twrite\ta\tbook\tof\ttravels,\tand\tthey\tgive America\t about\t five\t lines\t in\t it.\t And\t what\t do\t they\t say\t about\t us?\t They\t say\t this wilderness\t is\t populated\t with\t a\t scattering\t few\t hundred\t thousand\t billions\t of\t red angels,\t with\t now\tand\t then\t a\t curiously\t complected\t diseased\t one.\t You\t see,\t they think\twe\twhites\tand\tthe\toccasional\tnigger\tare\tInjuns\tthat\thave\tbeen\tbleached\tout or\tblackened\tby\tsome\tleprous\tdisease\tor\tother--for\tsome\tpeculiarly\trascally\tsin, mind\tyou.\tIt\tis\ta\tmighty\tsour\tpill\tfor\tus\tall,\tmy\tfriend--even\tthe\tmodestest\tof\tus, let\talone\tthe\tother\tkind,\tthat\tthink\tthey\tare\tgoing\tto\tbe\treceived\tlike\ta\tlong-lost government\tbond,\tand\thug\tAbraham\tinto\tthe\tbargain.\tI\thaven't\tasked\tyou\tany\tof the\t particulars,\t Captain,\t but\t I\t judge\t it\t goes\t without\t saying--if\t my\t experience\t is worth\t anything--that\t there\t wasn't\t much\t of\t a\t hooraw\t made\t over\t you\t when\t you","arrived--now\twas\tthere?\\\" \\\"Don't\t mention\t it,\t Sandy,\\\"\t says\t I,\t coloring\t up\t a\t little;\t \\\"I\t wouldn't\t have\t had the\t family\t see\t it\t for\t any\t amount\t you\t are\t a\t mind\t to\t name.\t Change\t the\t subject, Sandy,\tchange\tthe\tsubject.\\\" \\\"Well,\tdo\tyou\tthink\tof\tsettling\tin\tthe\tCalifornia\tdepartment\tof\tbliss?\\\" \\\"I\t don't\t know.\t I\t wasn't\t calculating\t on\t doing\t anything\t really\t definite\t in\t that direction\ttill\tthe\tfamily\tcome.\tI\tthought\tI\twould\tjust\tlook\taround,\tmeantime,\tin\ta quiet\t way,\t and\t make\t up\t my\t mind.\t Besides,\t I\t know\t a\t good\t many\t dead\t people, and\t I\t was\t calculating\t to\t hunt\t them\t up\t and\t swap\t a\t little\t gossip\t with\t them\t about friends,\t and\t old\t times,\t and\t one\t thing\t or\t another,\t and\t ask\t them\t how\t they\t like\t it here,\t as\t far\t as\t they\t have\t got.\t I\t reckon\t my\t wife\t will\t want\t to\t camp\t in\t the California\t range,\t though,\t because\t most\t all\t her\t departed\t will\t be\t there,\t and\t she likes\tto\tbe\twith\tfolks\tshe\tknows.\\\" \\\"Don't\tyou\tlet\ther.\tYou\tsee\twhat\tthe\tJersey\tdistrict\tof\theaven\tis,\tfor\twhites; well,\t the\t California\t district\t is\t a\t thousand\t times\t worse.\t It\t swarms\t with\t a\t mean kind\tof\tleather-headed\tmud-colored\tangels--and\tyour\tnearest\twhite\tneighbors\tis likely\t to\t be\t a\t million\t miles\t away.\t What\t a\t man\t mostly\t misses,\t in\t heaven,\t is company--company\t of\t his\t own\t sort\t and\t color\t and\t language.\t I\t have\t come\t near settling\tin\tthe\tEuropean\tpart\tof\theaven\tonce\tor\ttwice\ton\tthat\taccount.\\\" \\\"Well,\twhy\tdidn't\tyou,\tSandy?\\\" \\\"Oh,\tvarious\treasons.\tFor\tone\tthing,\talthough\tyou\tsee\tplenty\tof\twhites\tthere, you\tcan't\tunderstand\tany\tof\tthem\thardly,\tand\tso\tyou\tgo\tabout\tas\thungry\tfor\ttalk as\tyou\tdo\there.\tI\tlike\tto\tlook\tat\ta\tRussian\tor\ta\tGerman\tor\tan\tItalian--I\teven\tlike to\tlook\tat\ta\tFrenchman\tif\tI\tever\thave\tthe\tluck\tto\tcatch\thim\tengaged\tin\tanything that\tain't\tindelicate--but\tlooking\tdon't\tcure\tthe\thunger--what\tyou\twant\tis\ttalk.\\\" \\\"Well,\tthere's\tEngland,\tSandy--the\tEnglish\tdistrict\tof\theaven.\\\" \\\"Yes,\tbut\tit\tis\tnot\tso\tvery\tmuch\tbetter\tthan\tthis\tend\tof\tthe\theavenly\tdomain. As\tlong\tas\tyou\trun\tacross\tEnglishmen\tborn\tthis\tside\tof\tthree\thundred\tyears\tago, you\t are\t all\t right;\t but\t the\t minute\t you\t get\t back\t of\t Elizabeth's\t time\t the\t language begins\tto\tfog\tup,\tand\tthe\tfurther\tback\tyou\tgo\tthe\tfoggier\tit\tgets.\tI\thad\tsome\ttalk with\t one\t Langland\t and\t a\t man\t by\t the\t name\t of\t Chaucer--old-time\t poets--but\t it was\tno\tuse,\tI\tcouldn't\tquite\tunderstand\tthem\tand\tthey\tcouldn't\tquite\tunderstand me.\tI\thave\thad\tletters\tfrom\tthem\tsince,\tbut\tit\tis\tsuch\tbroken\tEnglish\tI\tcan't\tmake it\t out.\t Back\t of\t those\t men's\t time\t the\t English\t are\t just\t simply\t foreigners,\t nothing more,\tnothing\tless;\tthey\ttalk\tDanish,\tGerman,\tNorman\tFrench,\tand\tsometimes\ta mixture\tof\tall\tthree;\tback\tof\tthem,\tthey\ttalk\tLatin,\tand\tancient\tBritish,\tIrish,\tand Gaelic;\t and\t then\t back\t of\t these\t come\t billions\t and\t billions\t of\t pure\t savages\t that","talk\t a\t gibberish\t that\t Satan\t himself\t couldn't\t understand.\t The\t fact\t is,\t where\t you strike\t one\t man\t in\t the\t English\t settlements\t that\t you\t can\t understand,\t you\t wade through\tawful\tswarms\tthat\ttalk\tsomething\tyou\tcan't\tmake\thead\tnor\ttail\tof.\tYou see,\tevery\tcountry\ton\tearth\thas\tbeen\toverlaid\tso\toften,\tin\tthe\tcourse\tof\ta\tbillion years,\t with\t different\t kinds\t of\t people\t and\t different\t sorts\t of\t languages,\t that\t this sort\tof\tmongrel\tbusiness\twas\tbound\tto\tbe\tthe\tresult\tin\theaven.\\\" \\\"Sandy,\\\"\t says\tI,\t\\\"did\tyou\t see\ta\tgood\t many\tof\t the\tgreat\t people\t history\ttells about?\\\" \\\"Yes--plenty.\tI\tsaw\tkings\tand\tall\tsorts\tof\tdistinguished\tpeople.\\\" \\\"Do\tthe\tkings\trank\tjust\tas\tthey\tdid\tbelow?\\\" \\\"No;\t a\t body\t can't\t bring\t his\t rank\t up\t here\t with\t him.\t Divine\t right\t is\t a\t good- enough\t earthly\t romance,\t but\t it\t don't\t go,\t here.\t Kings\t drop\t down\t to\t the\t general level\tas\tsoon\tas\tthey\treach\tthe\trealms\tof\tgrace.\tI\tknew\tCharles\tthe\tSecond\tvery well--one\tof\tthe\tmost\tpopular\tcomedians\tin\tthe\tEnglish\tsection--draws\tfirst\trate. There\t are\t better,\t of\t course--people\t that\t were\t never\t heard\t of\t on\t earth--but Charles\tis\tmaking\ta\tvery\tgood\treputation\tindeed,\tand\tis\tconsidered\ta\trising\tman. Richard\tthe\tLionhearted\tis\tin\tthe\tprize-ring,\tand\tcoming\tinto\tconsiderable\tfavor. Henry\tthe\tEighth\tis\ta\ttragedian,\tand\tthe\tscenes\twhere\the\tkills\tpeople\tare\tdone\tto the\tvery\tlife.\tHenry\tthe\tSixth\tkeeps\ta\treligious-book\tstand.\\\" \\\"Did\tyou\tever\tsee\tNapoleon,\tSandy?\\\" \\\"Often--sometimes\t in\t the\t Corsican\t range,\t sometimes\t in\t the\t French.\t He always\thunts\tup\t a\t conspicuous\t place,\t and\t goes\tfrowning\t around\twith\t his\tarms folded\tand\this\tfield-glass\tunder\this\tarm,\tlooking\tas\tgrand,\tgloomy\tand\tpeculiar as\t his\t reputation\t calls\t for,\t and\t very\t much\t bothered\t because\t he\t don't\t stand\t as high,\there,\tfor\ta\tsoldier,\tas\the\texpected\tto.\\\" \\\"Why,\twho\tstands\thigher?\\\" \\\"Oh,\t a\t lot\t of\t people\t we\t never\t heard\t of\t before--the\t shoemaker\t and\t horse- doctor\t and\t knifegrinder\t kind,\t you\t know--clodhoppers\t from\t goodness\t knows where,\t that\t never\t handled\t a\t sword\t or\t fired\t a\t shot\t in\t their\t lives--but\t the soldiership\t was\t in\t them,\t though\t they\t never\t had\t a\t chance\t to\t show\t it.\t But\t here they\ttake\ttheir\tright\tplace,\tand\tCaesar\tand\tNapoleon\tand\tAlexander\thave\tto\ttake a\t back\t seat.\t The\t greatest\t military\t genius\t our\t world\t ever\t produced\t was\t a bricklayer\tfrom\tsomewhere\tback\tof\tBoston--died\tduring\tthe\tRevolution--by\tthe name\t of\t Absalom\t Jones.\t Wherever\t he\t goes,\t crowds\t flock\t to\t see\t him.\t You\t see, everybody\t knows\t that\t if\t he\t had\t had\t a\t chance\t he\t would\t have\t shown\t the\t world some\t generalship\t that\t would\t have\t made\t all\t generalship\t before\t look\t like\t child's play\t and\t 'prentice\t work.\t But\t he\t never\t got\t a\t chance;\t he\t tried\t heaps\t of\t times\t to","enlist\t as\t a\t private,\t but\t he\t had\t lost\t both\t thumbs\t and\t a\t couple\t of\t front\t teeth,\t and the\trecruiting\tsergeant\twouldn't\tpass\thim.\tHowever,\tas\tI\tsay,\teverybody\tknows, now,\twhat\the\twould\thave\tbeen,\tand\tso\tthey\tflock\tby\tthe\tmillion\tto\tget\ta\tglimpse of\t him\t whenever\t they\t hear\t he\t is\t going\t to\t be\t anywhere.\t Caesar,\t and\t Hannibal, and\t Alexander,\t and\t Napoleon\t are\t all\t on\t his\t staff,\t and\t ever\t so\t many\t more\t great generals;\tbut\tthe\tpublic\thardly\tcare\tto\tlook\tat\tthem\twhen\the\tis\taround.\t Boom! There\tgoes\tanother\tsalute.\tThe\tbarkeeper's\toff\tquarantine\tnow.\\\" \t Sandy\t and\t I\t put\t on\t our\t things.\t Then\t we\t made\t a\t wish,\t and\t in\t a\t second\t we were\t at\t the\t reception-place.\t We\t stood\t on\t the\t edge\t of\t the\t ocean\t of\t space,\t and looked\t out\t over\t the\t dimness,\t but\t couldn't\t make\t out\t anything.\t Close\t by\t us\t was the\t Grand\t Stand--tier\t on\t tier\t of\t dim\t thrones\t rising\t up\t toward\t the\t zenith.\t From each\tside\tof\tit\tspread\taway\tthe\ttiers\tof\tseats\tfor\tthe\tgeneral\tpublic.\tThey\tspread away\t for\t leagues\t and\t leagues--you\t couldn't\t see\t the\t ends.\t They\t were\t empty\t and still,\tand\thadn't\ta\tcheerful\tlook,\tbut\tlooked\tdreary,\tlike\ta\ttheater\tbefore\tanybody comes--gas\tturned\tdown.\tSandy\tsays,-- \\\"We'll\t sit\t down\t here\t and\t wait.\t We'll\t see\t the\t head\t of\t the\t procession\t come\t in sight\taway\toff\tyonder\tpretty\tsoon,\tnow.\\\" Says\tI,-- \\\"It's\t pretty\t lonesome,\t Sandy;\t I\t reckon\t there's\t a\t hitch\t somewheres.\t Nobody but\tjust\tyou\tand\tme--it\tain't\tmuch\tof\ta\tdisplay\tfor\tthe\tbarkeeper.\\\" \\\"Don't\tyou\tfret,\tit's\tall\tright.\tThere'll\tbe\tone\tmore\tgunfire--then\tyou'll\tsee.\\\" In\ta\tlittle\twhile\twe\tnoticed\ta\tsort\tof\ta\tlightish\tflush,\taway\toff\ton\tthe\thorizon. \\\"Head\tof\tthe\ttorchlight\tprocession,\\\"\tsays\tSandy. It\t spread,\t and\t got\t lighter\t and\t brighter;\t soon\t it\t had\t a\t strong\t glare\t like\t a locomotive\t headlight;\t it\t kept\t on\t getting\t brighter\t and\t brighter\t till\t it\t was\t like\t the sun\tpeeping\tabove\tthe\thorizonline\tat\tsea--the\tbig\tred\trays\tshot\thigh\tup\tinto\tthe sky. \\\"Keep\t your\t eyes\t on\t the\t Grand\t Stand\t and\t the\t miles\t of\t seats--sharp!\\\"\t says Sandy,\t\\\"and\tlisten\tfor\tthe\tgunfire.\\\" Just\tthen\tit\tburst\tout,\t\\\"Boom-boom-boom!\\\"\tlike\ta\tmillion\tthunder-storms\tin one,\tand\tmade\tthe\twhole\theavens\trock.\tThen\tthere\twas\ta\tsudden\tand\tawful\tglare of\t light\t all\t about\t us,\t and\t in\t that\t very\t instant\t every\t one\t of\t the\t millions\t of\t seats was\t occupied,\t and\t as\t far\t as\t you\t could\t see,\t in\t both\t directions,\t was\t just\t a\t solid pack\t of\t people,\t and\t the\t place\t was\t all\t splendidly\t lit\t up!\t It\t was\t enough\t to\t take\t a","body's\tbreath\taway.\tSandy\tsays,-- \\\"That\t is\t the\t way\t we\t do\t it\t here.\t No\t time\t fooled\t away;\t nobody\t straggling\t in after\t the\t curtain's\t up.\t Wishing\t is\t quicker\t work\t than\t traveling.\t A\t quarter\t of\t a second\t ago\t these\t folks\t were\t millions\t of\t miles\t from\t here.\t When\t they\t heard\t the last\tsignal,\tall\tthey\thad\tto\tdo\twas\tto\twish,\tand\there\tthey\tare.\\\" The\tprodigious\tchoir\tstruck\tup,-- We\tlong\tto\thear\tthy\tvoice, To\tsee\tthee\tface\tto\tface. It\t was\t noble\t music,\t but\t the\t uneducated\t chipped\t in\t and\t spoilt\t it,\t just\t as\t the congregations\tused\tto\tdo\ton\tearth. The\thead\tof\tthe\tprocession\tbegun\tto\tpass,\tnow,\tand\tit\twas\ta\twonderful\tsight. It\tswept\talong,\tthick\tand\tsolid,\tfive\thundred\tthousand\tangels\tabreast,\tand\tevery angel\t carrying\t a\t torch\t and\t singing--the\t whirring\t thunder\t of\t the\t wings\t made\t a body's\thead\tache.\tYou\tcould\tfollow\tthe\tline\tof\tthe\tprocession\tback,\tand\tslanting upward\t into\t the\t sky,\t far\t away\t in\t a\t glittering\t snaky\t rope,\t till\t it\t was\t only\t a\t faint streak\tin\tthe\tdistance.\tThe\trush\twent\ton\tand\ton,\tfor\ta\tlong\ttime,\tand\tat\tlast,\tsure enough,\t along\t comes\t the\t barkeeper,\t and\t then\t everybody\t rose,\t and\t a\t cheer\t went up\tthat\tmade\tthe\theavens\tshake,\tI\ttell\tyou!\tHe\twas\tall\tsmiles,\tand\thad\this\thalo tilted\t over\t one\t ear\t in\t a\t cocky\t way,\t and\t was\t the\t most\t satisfied-looking\t saint\t I ever\t saw.\t While\t he\t marched\t up\t the\t steps\t of\t the\t Grand\t Stand,\t the\t choir\t struck up,-- The\twhole\twide\theaven\tgroans, And\twaits\tto\thear\tthat\tvoice. There\t were\t four\t gorgeous\t tents\t standing\t side\t by\t side\t in\t the\t place\t of\t honor, on\ta\tbroad\trailed\tplatform\tin\tthe\tcenter\tof\tthe\tGrand\tStand,\twith\ta\tshining\tguard of\t honor\t round\t about\t them.\t The\t tents\t had\t been\t shut\t up\t all\t this\t time.\t As\t the barkeeper\tclimbed\talong\tup,\tbowing\tand\tsmiling\tto\teverybody,\tand\tat\tlast\tgot\tto the\t platform,\t these\t tents\t were\t jerked\t up\t aloft\t all\t of\t a\t sudden,\t and\t we\t saw\t four noble\tthrones\tof\tgold,\tall\tcaked\twith\tjewels,\tand\tin\tthe\ttwo\tmiddle\tones\tsat\told white-whiskered\t men,\t and\t in\t the\t two\t others\t a\t couple\t of\t the\t most\t glorious\t and gaudy\tgiants,\twith\tplatter\thalos\tand\tbeautiful\tarmor.\tAll\tthe\tmillions\twent\tdown on\t their\t knees,\t and\t stared,\t and\t looked\t glad,\t and\t burst\t out\t into\t a\t joyful\t kind\t of","murmurs:\tThey\tsaid,-- \\\"Two\tarchangels!--that\tis\tsplendid.\tWho\tcan\tthe\tothers\tbe?\\\" The\tarchangels\tgave\tthe\tbarkeeper\ta\tstiff\tlittle\tmilitary\tbow;\tthe\ttwo\told\tmen rose;\t one\t of\t them\t said,\t \\\"Moses\t and\t Esau\t welcome\t thee!\\\"\t and\t then\t all\t the\t four vanished,\tand\tthe\tthrones\twere\tempty. The\t barkeeper\t looked\t a\t little\t disappointed,\t for\t he\t was\t calculating\t to\t hug those\t old\t people,\t I\t judge;\t but\t it\t was\t the\t gladdest\t and\t proudest\t multitude\t you ever\tsaw--because\tthey\thad\tseen\tMoses\tand\tEsau.\tEverybody\twas\tsaying,\t\\\"Did you\t see\t them?--I\t did--Esau's\t side\t face\t was\t to\t me,\t but\t I\t saw\t Moses\t full\t in\t the face,\tjust\tas\tplain\tas\tI\tsee\tyou\tthis\tminute!\\\" The\tprocession\ttook\tup\tthe\tbarkeeper\tand\tmoved\ton\twith\thim\tagain,\tand\tthe crowd\tbroke\tup\tand\tscattered.\tAs\twe\twent\talong\thome,\tSandy\tsaid\tit\twas\ta\tgreat success,\tand\tthe\tbarkeeper\twould\thave\ta\tright\tto\tbe\tproud\tof\tit\tforever.\tAnd\the said\twe\t were\t in\t luck,\t too;\t said\t we\t might\t attend\t receptions\t for\t forty\t thousand years\t to\t come,\t and\t not\t have\t a\t chance\t to\t see\t a\t brace\t of\t such\t grand\t moguls\t as Moses\t and\t Esau.\t We\t found\t afterwards\t that\t we\t had\t come\t near\t seeing\t another patriarch,\t and\t likewise\t a\t genuine\t prophet\t besides,\t but\t at\t the\t last\t moment\t they sent\tregrets.\tSandy\tsaid\tthere\twould\tbe\ta\tmonument\tput\tup\tthere,\twhere\tMoses and\t Esau\t had\t stood,\t with\t the\t date\t and\t circumstances,\t and\t all\t about\t the\t whole business,\t and\t travelers\t would\t come\t for\t thousands\t of\t years\t and\t gawk\t at\t it,\t and climb\tover\tit,\tand\tscribble\ttheir\tnames\ton\tit. 1907"]
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