Fr. Amatus Kallarackal

iii “A LITTLE BETTERALWAYS” The Story of a Priest who Walked with God FR. AMATUS KALLARACKAL CMI (1924-2008) BY REV. DR. ABRAHAM JOSEPH VADAKKEMURIYIL CMI Published By The Department of Education and Media CMI St. Paul’s Province, Carmel Bhavan, Mysuru

At that time Jesus said, “I praise You, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that You have hidden these things from the wise and intelligent and have revealed them to infants. (Mathew 11:25)

vi Not by fleshly wisdom but by God’s grace (2 Corinthians 1:12)

vii A Humble Formator with the Novices and Novice Master (Fr. Thomas Kuniyanthodath) at Thandavapura Death Anniversary celebrations of Fr. Amatus at Thudanganad

viii On the day of Sacerdotal Golden Jubilee of Fr. Amatus

ix Forever in our Minds

x The Tomb of Fr. Amatus at St. Paul’s Carmel Thandavapura For you will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your holy one to rot in the grave (Psalm16:10)

xi From the Museum of Fr. Amatus at Thandavapura

xii PREFACE Publication of the life history of Fr. Amatus was one of the important decisions of the 7th Provincial Synaxis of St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru. Fr. Amatus started his religious life in the Sacred Heart Province, Kalamassery, and later opted for Mysuru mission in the year 1978. It was the keen interest of Rev. Dr. Varghese Kelamparampil CMI, Provincial, St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru that made this book into a reality. I acknowledge his encouragement and timely help in accomplishing this project. It was not an easy task to get all the data related to his early life and training and his life in Kalamassery Province. There were so many generous hands who helped me to collect all the details before writing down the history of his life. Fr. Shijo Panjikkal CMI was the one who took up the trouble of collecting the primary historical details of his life from Kalamassery under the guidance of Fr. Suraj Kottayl CMI, the secretary of the Department of Education of the St. Paul’s Province Mysuru. There were many Rev. Fathers of the Province who contributed to the details of his life, shared their experiences with Fr. Amatus, and helped me to correct the primary draft. Fr. Joseph Edakkery CMI, Fr. Kuriachan Marangolil CMI, Fr. Varghese Koluthara CMI,

xiii Fr. Emmanuel Ayankudy CMI, Fr. George Kalambukattu CMI, Fr. Bibin Chenganchery CMI, Fr. Francis Chirackal CMI, Fr. Saneesh Pathickal CMI etc. are some of them. I thankfully acknowledge the tedious task of language correction of the final draft undertaken by Fr. Biju Naduthottyil CMI and Fr. George Plackal CMI. The printing work and the final settings of the text were undertaken by Ramya Reprographic Pvt. Ltd., Bengaluru. I thankfully acknowledge their service. I humbly present to the public this simple biography of Fr. Amatus with its many limitations. I hope and pray that this book may help spreading the fragrance of the virtues of Fr. Amatus among the public. Mysuru Fr. Abraham Vadakkemuriyil CMI 14-01-2023

MESSAGE Mar. Sebastian Adayanthrath, Bishop of Mandya Live in a More Radical Sobriety Wishes for the Book on Fr. Amatus Kallarackal CMI Almost twenty-three years ago, I was sitting in a room at St. Peter’s Seminary, London, quite worried and upset about my own spiritual life that I have not grown very much in the love of God and love of other human persons. I happened to read that night a book written by Fr. Ronald Rolheiser by name “Sacred Fire” and the Ten Commandments he proposed for mature living touched me. They are: 1. Live in gratitude and thank your creator by enjoying your life. 2. Be willing to carry more and more life’s complexities with empathy. 3.Transform jealousy, anger, bitterness, and hatred rather than give them back in kind. 4. Let suffering soften your heart rather than harden your soul. 5. Forgive-those who hurt you, your own sins, and the unfairness of your life, and God for not rescuing you.

viii 6. Bless more and curse less. 7. Live in a more radical sobriety. 8. Pray affectively and liturgically. 9. Be wide with your embrace. 10. Stand where you are supposed to be standing, and let God provide the rest. When I read the book on Fr. Amatus CMI, God’s pauper, I am reminded of the above, which are written in my diary. Father Amatus lived a life, which was so full- fulfilling these commandments above. He becomes an example for us since he walked very close to Him and I am sure that he will inspire many generations to come. The most important thing that I find in his life is his affection and fondness for life. I was so happy to visit the monastery where he lived, and I prayed in that room. I felt something very special. I am given to understand that he was a man of contentment, restfulness, and joy. Our world needs this badly since we live in a restless world. I am sure that when the Father in heaven met him, must have told him “You are my blessed one, in you I take delight.” I am deeply grateful to Mysuru province CMI congregation for journeying with the diocese of Mandya in its attempt to become Good News for the people around us. I am deeply touched by the book written by Fr. Abraham Vadakkemuriyil CMI who has taken a lot of effort to collect memoirs on Fe. Amatus CMI. This book will help many to come to know the life and

ix person of Father Amatus CMI. May the Lord bless Father Abraham and all his team members. Anthropologists tell us that there are three components to a blessing. To bless someone is to see and admire that person, speak well of him or her, give away some of your life so that he/she will be known to others so that she or he has more life. What Fr. Abraham Vadakkemuriyil and his team want to say that the whole of Mysuru Province is doing through this book, is to make Father Amatus a blessing for those who are searching for the meaning of life and how to become a light in a world where there is lots of darkness. May the book go to many hands and hearts. My wishes to everyone!!! Bishop of Mandya

MESSAGE Archbishop Emeritus Mar. Jacob Thoomkuzhy, (Former Bishop of Mananthavady) I am so happy to know that St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru of the CMI congregation is publishing the life history of Late Rev. Fr. Amatus Kallarackal CMI a saintly Carmelite Religious Priest who lived and died in the mission area of Mysuru in our times. He was exceptionally spiritual and a very simple and humble priest and a highly appreciated pastor too. He was a parish priest in the year 1983-84 in the parish of Marakkadavu in the Diocese of Mananthavady. People of Marakkadavu and neighbouring places respected him as a saintly priest. His virtuous life was a great inspiration for the members of CMI St. Paul’s province and for all those who knew him in the congregation. Publication of his life history is a good opportunity to know more about this Holy man and his heroic life as a true disciple of Christ in the Church. I sincerely congratulate Rev. Dr. Abraham Joseph Vadakkemuriyil CMI, the author of this book, for undertaking the difficult work of collecting and writing down the details of his life and activities. I also congratulate

xi the Department of Education of the CMI St. Paul’s Province for the publication of this book. Lives of the saints are always highly inspirational for the believers to follow Jesus more closely, especially in these modern times when Church needs genuine Models who heroically lived their faith in Christ on earth. I wish and pray that the book may gain wide circulation and large readership and may it perpetuate the memory of Rev. Fr. Amatus Kallarackal CMI as a saintly religious priest in the universal Church and bring glory to God and His blessings on the people. Wishing God’s blessings, In Jesus Abp. Mar Jacob Thoomkuzhy Former Bishop of Mananthavady

MESSAGE Mar. Joseph Porunnedam, Bishop of Mananthavady Rev Fr Amatus CMI, as his name suggests, was a man of love and concern towards everyone he encountered. He too was loved by all, I am convinced. My contact with him started with his appointment as parish priest of St Joseph's Parish, Marakkadave in the diocese of Mananthavady. Since the diocese did not have a sufficient number of priests, it was usual to invite the services of priests of various religious congregations. Fr Amatus, even though he does not have anything tangible for his memory there, is fondly remembered by the elder generation of the parish. He did not build any brick-and-mortar structure there; the parishioners did not request him to do so either. He did not build a modern parish church at Marakkadavu, but he built the Church of Christ there. He was not a person of oratory; but he loved to live what he preached. His example was much louder than his actions. He never bothered about money, nor did he complain about the inconveniences of his residence or food. His lean, slightly forward bent body was an eloquent witnessing of his hermit-like ascetic life. He had absolute trust in his Kaikars and they reciprocated it to their maximum. They lived up to his trust and worked

xiii wonders there. It was a perfect example of how parish priests can be men of prayer and asceticism. Fr Amatus was a man of prayer and availability to his people. He was always seen in or around the parish church, praying the rosary and reciting his canonical prayers. He spent hours in front of the Most Blessed Sacrament. From the Lord, rather than from his food, he drew his energy. He was accessible to the parishioners for any spiritual assistance any time of the day or night. He was not at all pretentious and made no claims to his credit. He never sought praise from people. He was always heard saying that he did what God wanted from him. As a solemnly professed religious, Fr Amatus was considered to be a person who lived up to his three vows to their core. He would not compromise on them. I have seen personally how obedient he was to his superiors who were much younger than him and many of whom were his own novices. He would not even go out without the prior permission of his superiors and never violate the rules of the ashram, no matter what came. Certainly, many would find him inimitable a too simpleton, for today's standards. The one thing that attracted me to Fr Amatus was his childlike simplicity. I have never seen him raise his voice at people. Often his reaction would end in an angelic smile

xiv that had a magical effect. Indeed, I am convinced that Fr Amatus is a saintly and holy person who has already found his favour with the eternal Father. May his memory live forever and inspire many more to enter religious life Mananthavady Bishop Joseph Porunnedam 22 December, 2022 Bishop of the diocese of Mananthavady

MESSAGE Very. Rev. Fr. Thomas Chathamparampil, CMI Prior General I am so much delighted to know about the upcoming publication of a book on Rev. Fr Amatus Kallarackal CMI. Fr Amatus lived a saintly life in the context of Mysuru mission inspiring the Christians and non-Christians alike. I firmly believe that his innocent soul has been well placed in the heavenly abode. I would like to appreciate the genuine efforts of Rev. Fr Abraham Vadakkemuriyil CMI, the author of this book and also the Department of Education and Media, CMI- St Paul's Province Mysuru, for accomplishing this noble task. This book is a significant contribution to our propagation of faith amidst the challenges the Church faces today, especially the ever-growing tendencies of atheism and secularization. The book narrates the life of a priest who walked with God knowing and reflecting the life of Christ. Fr Amatus reflected and lived Christ in the Gospel after the example of St Chavara, the founder of CMI Congregation. Being an exceptional CMI religious in leading a humble, pious, and heroically virtuous life, Fr Amatus was an inspiration for many. Fr Amatus is a model for all who seek

xvi to live a genuine Christian life in the Church. The entire CMI Congregation rejoices in publishing this book as a tribute to the saintly soul of Fr Amatus. I acknowledge the effort and dedication of Rev. Fr Abraham Vadakkemuriyil CMI in authoring the book, and the support and encouragement of CMI- St Paul's Province, Mysuru. Fr Thomas Chathamparampil CMI Prior General

Forward I am delighted so much at the publication of the life history of Late Rev. Fr. Amatus Kallarackal who lived a life of admirable sanctity as a pioneering missionary of CMI Mysuru Province. Saints are people who closely followed Jesus Christ of the Gospels and wholeheartedly accepted His cross in their life as the true sons and daughters of the Church, the mystical body of Christ. The lives of the saints are always sources of inspiration and models for imitation for the believers in the Church to follow Jesus more closely. The Church always gives high priority to the heroic witnessing to the Gospel values by its saints and promote their examples for the inspiration of the faithful as a part of its rich tradition. Faith in the communion of saints is a part of the Church’s official creed. The Latin phrase Communio sanctorum has two shades of meaning: communion in holy things and communion among saints. The first denotes the spiritual goods that are communicated including the Word of God, the diversity of charisms and the sacred tradition of the Church, and the sacraments, especially the Holy Eucharist. The Eucharist is so important because, it is the Eucharist that brings the communion as a real sacramental experience in our everyday living. The second meaning is the communion of the saints or sancti. The communion of the saints or sancti refers to the Church itself. This encompasses three different stages: The Church in the world, the Church in purgatory and the triumphant Church in heaven. The Church,

2 then is sum total of its saints on earth and the saints in the presence of God’s light in Heaven. The saints in heaven are those who possess the full inheritance, and partakers of the divine nature and all are called to this inheritance as it is written “not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as he who called is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct (1 Peter 1: 14-15) which is well founded on Leviticus where it is written, ‘you shall be holy for I am Holy’ (11:4). As religious life itself is a call to live extraordinary sanctity, many heroic men and women strives to live a life of sanctity. Every religious community produces extraordinary men and women of heroic practices of Christian virtues as they live their charism in complete fidelity to their call. CMI St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru, is proud of presenting the story of such a saintly soul in the person of Fr. Amatus. Fr. Amatus lived his edifying life as a poor, simple, and obedient religious in our midst inspiring us all during his life time and after his death. Being an extraordinarily humble and inspiringly simple soul, Fr. Amatus lived his religious-priestly vocation with a child-like innocence and purity of heart. His radiating presence in the community generated a feeling of being close to Jesus for his fellow religious. His personal, compassionate, and loving care and sympathetic concern to all the members of the community resembled him as the face of Christ in our midst. He was acknowledged and revered by everybody as a saint while he lived among us.

3 More than a committed and saintly religious Fr Amatus was an excellent pastor and a model priest. The people of the parishes he served just for a period of one year have sacred memories about his holy personality, loving approaches, and prayerful life. Many of them considered him as real man of God. The people of Marakkadavu, a parish in the diocese of Mananthavady, Kerala even called him as The God of Marakkadavu (Marakkadavinte Daivam). Among the people of Karukutty, Kerala, he was popularly known as Eesho Achan (ഈശ ോ അച്ചൻ) Our seminarians who were lucky to have spiritual training under him so thankfully remember him as a Guru par excellent. The motto of his spiritual life ‘A little better always’ reminds us of the resemblance of his personality to that of St. Theresa of Lisieux. He did not have any extraordinary achievements during his life time which suits to the standard of the world. His greatest and unique achievement was his saintly personality and virtuous life as a religious priest. Fr. Amatus was a fully satisfied man as he lived on earth with a deep sense of self fulfillment and contentment. This made his personal presence in the communities so much valuable and inspiring. The fragrance of his personal holiness attracted many towards him and they considered him as a living saint. The present life history gives a lot of first-hand testimonial narratives about his saintly life and personality from the fathers and brothers who lived with him. All of them unanimously agree about his heroic practice of Christian Virtues and his simple and obedient life

4 and his deep prayer experience. His caring and loving concern to others is specifically mentioned by almost all of them. It was a unanimous decision in our provincial synaxis and councils to publish a detailed history of the saintly life of Fr. Amatus as we are all convinced of his exemplary life of holiness. Fr. Amatus started his religious life in the Sacred Heart Province, Kalamassery (present Kochi Province) and rendered his priestly- religious ministry in the Kalamassery Province itself and later moved to Mysuru mission in the year 1978. It was a rather difficult task to collect all the details of his life history. After two years of continuous efforts Rev. Dr. Abraham Vadakkemuriyil CMI of our Province finally came out with a rather comprehensive history of his virtuous life. The first half of his life in Kalamassery Province still need to be explored in detail and his life in Mysuru mission is very well exposed with all its details. The present work undoubtedly proves his life of extraordinary sanctity with its multiple dimensions. Lots of testimonies of the fellow religious as well as his relatives and the faithful public are quoted. I sincerely acknowledge the commendable effort made by the Department of Education of our Province under the guidance of Rev. Fr. Suraj Kottayl CMI with the committed efforts of Rev. Fr. Shijo Panjikkal CMI in collecting the necessary data which helped Rev. Dr. Abraham Vadakkemuriyil in writing down the matter. I also thankfully remember Rev. Frs. George Plackal, Biju Naduthottyil , Francis Chirackal, Joseph Edakkery and George Kalambukattu for their generous help in the process of editing the final text.

5 I appreciate and acknowledge the tedious task undertook by Rev. Dr. Abraham Vadakkemuriyil in bringing out the text in its present form. The first two chapters of the book is dedicated to his early religious training and his services in Kalamassery Province. The remaining chapters are dedicated to present his life and activities as well as personal life of holiness in the Mysuru mission. The final chapter presents his glorious and dignified last moments. An appendix also is added presenting most of the original writings and testimonies about Fr. Amatus. I hope the book will help us spreading the fragrance of the virtuous life of Fr. Amatus which will accelerate the process of raising him to sainthood. I once again congratulate the author the book Rev. Dr. Abraham Vadakkemuriyil CMI and the Department of Education of our Province for their hard work in realizing this dream. Carmel Bhavan, Fr. Dr. Varghese Kelamparampil CMI Mysuru. 1-11-202 Provincial, St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru

6 Tittle: “A LITTLE BETTER ALWAYS”: THE STORY OF A PRIEST WHO WALKED WITH GOD FR. AMATUS KALLARACKAL CMI(1924-2008 ) Author: Rev. Dr. Abraham Joseph Vadakkemuriyil CMI [email protected] First edition: January, 2023 Published by The Department of Education and Media CMI, St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru. Cover design: Rev. Fr. Ginto Enchikkalayil CMI Layout: Ramya Reprographic Pvt. Ltd, Bengaluru. Printed at: Ramya Reprographic Pvt. Ltd For Private Circulation Only Carmel Bhavan, N.R .Mohalla, Shivaji main road, Mysuru-560 007 [email protected] Mysuru-570 007 14-01-2023

TABLE OF CONTENTS Preface v Message vii Mar. Sebastian Adayanthrath, Bishop of Mandya x Message Mar. Jacob Thoomkuzhy, xii Archbishop Emeritus Message xv Mar Joseph Porunnedam, Bishop of Mananthavady 1 Message Very. Rev. Fr. Thomas Chathamparampil CMI, 7 CMI Prior General 9 Forward Rev. Dr. Varghese Kelamparampil CMI, Provincial, St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru Contents Chapter 1 Introduction Chapter 2 12 Birth and Early Life Chapter 3 18 The Call and the Struggle: Early Religious Training Chapter 4 26 The Early Priestly Service in the Sacred Heart Province, Kalamassery

8 Chapter 5 32 Life in Mysuru Mission Chapter 6 44 The Admirable Simplicity of Mind Chapter 7 70 A Saint of Spiritual Simplicity Chapter 8 95 Fr. Amatus and his Life of Material Simplicity Chapter 9 100 Fr. Amatus Experienced God’s Providential Care as a Loving Father and was Eager to Reach His Abode Chapter 10 106 Toward the Final Days of his Life Chapter 11 110 The Last Rites 119 Appendix 170 Photos

Chapter 1 INTRODUCTION This book is intended to present the history and holiness of the life of Fr. Amatus. Together with the presentation of Fr. Amatus’ life history, we here undertake an analysis of the saintly life of Fr. Amatus as a religious priest. Making use of the available chronological details and incorporating other supporting documentary evidences and personal witnesses that were recorded till today, we are trying to present his life history, giving special references to his life as a Carmelite religious priest. Fr. Amatus lived a life which was not very much noticed by others. He was a silent soul who heroically practiced religious virtues without much orchestration outside. There is thus the problem of lack of recorded materials while writing his life history. Fr. Amatus lived almost half of his life in the CMI Sacred Heart Province of Kalamassery, the Present Kochi Province, including his early religious and priestly training period. The second half of his life was spent here in St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru as a missionary. This book is divided into two main parts. The first part deals with the early life, call to religious life and priestly training and his early life in Kalamassery Province. The second part of the book deals with his life in Mysuru mission giving more importance to his holy personality.

10 The saintly life of Fr. Amatus consists not in any external achievements that could be recorded as a classifying criterion of his sainthood. He was a man who believed in the divine providence and completely dedicated himself for the will of God. This made him a man of total commitment to God and man, not as an achiever rather as a man of simple life and prayer. Inner simplicity coupled with complete dependence on divine providence, and heroic acceptance of life’s sufferings, after the example of St. Kuriakose Elias Chavara, the founder of CMI congregation, were the distinguishing marks of his extraordinary personality. The motto of his life was “a little better always.” In this approach we can compare him with St. Theresa of Lisieux. She is at least known through her autobiography, The Story of a Soul which is a spiritual classic today. Fr. Amatus did not record anything that made him known to the world apart from a few personal letters written to his close relatives and fellow religious. He was a man of inner silence and complete obedience to God and superiors. He submitted his will to God in its fullness and hence dedicated his body and spirit without any reservation to the Almighty. He considered the will of his superiors as the will of God and obedience as the real mission and characteristic mark of his life. This made him a humble religious with admirable simplicity of mind and heart. He translated this simplicity to his spiritual life

11 and material life. As a man fully committed to the providential care of the Almighty, he never bothered about the external comforts which were even permitted to him as a religious. He considered suffering for the sake of Christ as a privilege. He was not a man of words rather a man of inner sanctity that was translated into his relationship to God and man all through his life on earth. In the following pages as we go through his life, I have nothing to record that the world considers as valuable and admirable. What I have tried to present here is the story of a simple and humble soul who was not much noticed by the world during his life time on earth. But I firmly believe that Fr. Amatus who returned to his heavenly abode on the day of the Nativity of our Lady is reborn in heaven with Christ our King and His Mother, realizing the beatitude “Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God” (Mat. 5:8).

Chapter 2 Birth and Early Life Fr. Amatus was born on August 19, 1924 in his mother’s home, called Ponnumpurayidam family, at Kozhuvanal in the present diocese of Pala as the second son of Kallarackal Chandy and Mariam. His elder brother was Mr. Abraham Kallarackal and his sisters were Elikkutty Kallarackal and Sr. Dolloarus S.M.M.I. Fr. Amatus has also got yet another family name Varikkamackal. Mr. Chandy Kallarackal’s father Mr. Ittiyavara Kallarackal was married to Miss. Eliamma Varikkamackal, the third daughter of Mr. Thomman Varikkamackal and was adopted to the family of Varikkamackal deviating from the customary practice of the male partner taking the female to his own family. Because of this unusual adoption of Mr. Chandy to Varikkamackal family, Fr. Amatus was also known as member of the Varikkamackal Family. Fr. Amatus was also known as Kuttappan, which was his familiar name (nick name) at home. In the year 1931 at the age of five, the young Kuttappan lost his father which was an event that terribly shocked the child heart of Kuttappan. Thereafter his complete dependence was on his loving mother Mariyam, who was a woman of extraordinary courage and spiritual maturity. Under her loving care the young Kuttappan grew in extraordinary

13 spiritual zeal. On the death bed Mr. Chandy, his father, blessed them all saying \"you will be protected from all trouble as the divine providence will be with you always.\" This paternal blessing came true all through his life. His mother took care of him heroically as the true child of God. His mother was a very pious woman who was so pleasant with all the divine presence and blessings. She never found fault with anybody and was a very helping woman for the neighbours. She had extraordinary devotion to our Lady as she carried the rosary always with her. She observed all the days of fasting as prescribed by the Church. She insisted that all the members of the family should regularly attend the family prayers. She attended the Holy Mass daily as far as she was healthy to do so. She encouraged the children to read the Bible every day. During the Lenten season, at home, she used to lead the way of the cross after the family prayers. She used to pray for the dead regularly. This spiritual vigor of the mother laid the foundation for the later spiritual personality of Fr. Amatus. Regarding this Fr. Amatus himself speaks in his reply at the celebration of the Golden Jubilee of his Priestly ordination: I lost my father at the age of five. From then onwards it was my mother who managed the family matters single handedly. In the midst of all difficulties and troubles she used to accompany me

14 to the church for the daily Eucharistic Liturgy. This created a genuine awareness in my life that the Holy Eucharist is above everything else.1 Being a distant relative of St. Alphonsa (through his great-grandmother’s blood line),2 his mother became the biggest source of inspiration for him to become a priest. This inclination towards priestly life was shown in his early behaviors as he and his maternal uncle late Fr. Blais OFM., always imitated the priestly actions, that they witnessed in the church, at home. At the early age itself the child developed a taste for penance and fasting. He was least interested in food and even abandoned it for the sake of the poor and the hungry. At the school too he often distributed his food to the poor children. Regarding this Mr. 1 Fr. Varghese Kelamparampil CMI and Fr. JoJo Manjali CMI, (Eds.) “Paurohithya Suvarna Jubiliyil Amatus Achante Marupadi Prasangam Sukruthavazhiye: In Loving memory of Fr. Amatus CMI. Mysuru: (Department of Education and Communication, St. Paul’s Province, Mysuru), p. 30. 2 Alexander Kallarackal, from an Unpublished Paper, (His great grandmother Mariyam, of the maternal line, that is, the mother of his Grandmother Eliamma was from the family of Muttathupadam, Kudamalur. She was the sister of both Fr. Varghese Muttathupadathu and the grandfather of St. Alphonsa. Fr. Varghese Muttathupadathu was the contemporary of St. Kuriakose Elias Chavara.

15 Kuttiachan Ponnumpurayidam, the cousin brother of Fr. Amatus has the following to say: His mother's prayerful life and the habit of fasting and doing penance instilled in him a natural thirst for religious life from childhood onwards. Kuttappan used to show enthusiasm for reciting rosary and doing acts of penance. This family background created an ambience which helped Kuttappan to turn to religious life at an early stage. Mr. Alexander Kallarackal (Joy), his nephew, a professor of St. Thomas College (Rtd), Pala, writes that during his school days at leisure time Kuttappan and Ousepachan (late Fr. Blais OFM) used to enact funeral service at home. “Either Ousepachan or somebody else will enact oneself as a dead person and will lie down in the coffin and Kuttappan will sing the songs that they used to hear at funeral services and will incense the body and sprinkle it with water imitating the funeral rituals. He completed his schooling at three places namely, Mundankal, Piravithanam and Thudanganad in Pala. Kuttappan learned to be simple in heart and was practicing a virtuous life by being compassionate and helpful to others in

16 exemplary ways. During his school days as Mr. Aronikal Kutty, his classmate, testifies, Kuttappan showed extraordinary interest in helping the poor students by sharing his meal with them and often himself fasting during the day. It is said that his mother used to send him with noon-meals packet every day during his school days. Very often without the knowledge of the mother he used to give it to his poor colleagues who were hungry, and Kuttappan will wash his hands and face along with others making others feel that he had full meals. He used to do it in anonymity. Kuttappan’s mother or other family members did not notice it. Above all he learned the Christian virtues and developed a strong orientation to religious life at home from his mother.3 3 Alexander Kallarackal, “Oru Sahodarante Ormakurippukal”, in Sukruthavazhiye. pp. 25-29.

18 Chapter 3 THE CALL AND THE STRUGGLE: EARLY RELIGIOUS TRAINING The virtuous and pious young Kuttappan, with the influence of his mother’s extraordinary life of sanctity and his uncle Fr. Chrysostom CMI’s constant support and guidance, always cherished in his heart the desire of becoming a religious. His early schooling started at Mundankal primary school near Pala. He completed his second Standard at Piravithanam English medium school and third Standard from Thudanganad school. After the completion of his schooling, he did not think of any other status of life but to follow his uncle’s footsteps. Thus, marking a golden day in the history of CMI congregation the young Kuttappan entered CMI aspirants house of the congregation at Mannanam in the year 1942, at the age of eighteen. Seminary life in the first year as an aspirant for religious life went on well with Fr. Amatus under the guidance of Rev. Fr. Isaias CMI. But his life of mortification and penance made him physically weak. Though he did not exhibit any sign of physical illness his general weakness was noticed by everybody. When Fr. Amatus was in the aspirants’ house Rev. Fr. Vincentios

19 CMI was the Superior General of the congregation. He always insisted the meticulous observation of the rules of the community especially regarding the candidate’s promotion to higher stages. As per the rule of the time, a medical certificate, ensuring the good health of the candidate was necessary for promotion to higher stages. In accordance with this rule Fr. Amatus had to undergo strict medical check-up by the house physician. His first report was negative. A second opinion, though was positive which the doctor did without much check-up, was not accepted by the Superior General. A third check-up was initiated and the doctor did not give a positive report. Finally, Fr. Amatus was asked to return home considering his bad health condition as per the medical report. But the paternal blessing that, “the divine providence will be with him forever,” once again came to be a genuine life experience for the young Amatus as his then Rector Rev. Fr. Isaias CMI intervened and pleaded for him before Very Rev. Fr. Superior General. The extraordinary desire for sanctity and the genuine spirit of austerity that Fr. Amatus exhibited were mighty reasons for them to undermine his ill-health in promoting him to Novitiate. Under Rev.Fr. Isaias CMI’s fatherly care and concern and based on his strong conviction about the candidate’s extraordinary inclination towards a life of sanctity Fr. Amatus was promoted to St. Theresa’s Novitiate at Ambazhakadu in 1947. Even though

20 he was allowed to undergo Novitiate training, he was always under the fear and threat of being dropped in case if any serious issue of ill-health. But the providential care of the Lord was always with him and there was the will of the Almighty that he had to become a religious priest in the Carmelite Order. Fr. Amatus led an extraordinary life of spiritual vigour during his Novitiate life under the fatherly care and guidance of Fr. Garvasius CMI. He had a strong conviction that he had no outstanding abilities, physical or intellectual to convince the authorities that he was a fitting candidate to priesthood in the congregation. All the events related to his promotion to Novitiate at last brought him to such a mindset. It was only his spiritual zeal and the paternal blessings that pushed him forward all through his tribulations with an enduring hope about his future. Fr. Amatus himself mentions in an interview that there was an inner doubt about his worthiness to become a priest that always disturbed him sometimes even blocking his inner peace. The deep sense of unworthiness developed due to the inner crisis, that Fr. Amatus was going through, compelled him to make a formal request to his superiors about permitting him to be a lay brother instead of a priest in the congregation. This request resembles the reality of

21 the agonous struggle that he was experiencing and the growing doubt that was building up within him during his Novitiate formation about the possibility of his becoming a priest in the congregation. When he approached his Rector Fr. Garvasius CMI, with this request he was sent to the Prior of the Ashram for further discussion of the matter. The Prior of the Novitiate house in turn told him that the merit of the candidate will be decided by the evaluation committee. And he was asked to accept whatever decision that comes from the committee. These words gave a lot of consolation and, anyway, at the end of the Novitiate term he was promoted for further priestly studies. He made his first religious profession on 15th October 1948. When we look deeply into the initial experience of Fr. Amatus as a candidate to religious life and his firm conviction about the abiding providence of God in his religious journey trusting in the divine providence of the Almighty completely after his father’s paternal blessing on him, we are reminded of the words of St. John Paul II. In a Papal exhortation he says: In our reflection on creation, we begin today a series of catechesis whose theme lies both at the heart of the Christian faith, and in the heart of the person called to faith. It is the theme of divine Providence. It concerns God who, as a wise and omnipotent Father, is

22 present and active in the world and in the history of every creature. He does this so that every creature, and specifically man, God's image, may be able to live life as a journey under the guidance of truth and love toward the goal of eternal life in God. …This extraordinary truth of God guides our history with serene countenance and sure-hand. Paradoxically, it finds a twofold and conflicting sentiment in the heart of man. On the one hand, he is led to accept and to entrust himself to this Provident God, as the Psalmist says: \"I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a child quieted at its mother's breast\" (Ps 131:2). On the other hand, man fears and hesitates to abandon himself to God, as Lord and Saviour of his life. This is either because he is perplexed by things and forgets the Creator, or because of suffering he has doubts about God as Father. In both cases man calls divine Providence into question. Such is the human condition, that even in Sacred Scripture, Job does not hesitate to complain before God with frank confidence. In this way the word of God indicates that Providence is expressed even in the complaint of his children. Afflicted in body and heart, Job said: \"Oh, that I knew where I might find him, that I might come

23 even to his seat! I would lay my case before him, and fill my mouth with arguments\" (Job 23:3-4).4 This divine providence always guided Fr. Amatus and protected him in all his weaknesses and physical incapacities. Regarding his Novitiate training Rev. Dr. Varghese Koluthara CMI writes: After the pre-Novitiate training, he was sent to the St. Theresa's Novitiate in Ambazhakkad. His novice master was Fr. Garvasius CMI. The beautiful part of his religious life, as Fr. Amatus later described, was the time he had spent in the Novitiate. Here he had the initial taste of religious life. It is evident that whatever virtues he learned in the Novitiate he continued to practice till the death of his life on 8th September 2008, on the feast of the Nativity of our Blessed Mother. He enjoyed the silence, the meditation methods that were taught to him, the thapasa methods of purifying one self. He used to place small pieces of rocks under his sleeping bed and under his pillow. He used to wear 'mullaranjanam’ (metal cilice) 4 St. John Paul II, “Faith in Divine Providence Strengthens our Reasons for Hope”, Vatican City: (General Audience, April 30,1985).

24 to practice self- mortification. He continued these practices of self-mortification wherever he lived. It is said that during the Novitiate he used to compete with his own colleague, Fr. Manjus Kalapurackal CMI, in practicing virtues and growing up in the path of sanctity. Thus, he understood the meaning of religious life and the motive behind St. Chavara’s dream of leading a thapasa life in the midst of very many activities for proclaiming the kingdom of God and different dimensions of Christ's life. At the end of the Novitiate, he made his first profession on 15th October 1948 and Kuttappan Kallarackal became Amatus Kallarackal CMI.5 Despite all odds, Fr. Amatus was promoted for further priestly formation and was sent to Koonammavu major seminary. He completed his philosophical studies at Koonammavu under Fr. Kasianos CMI and Fr. Canisius CMI, who later became the Superior General of the congregation. Fr. Canisius is raised to the status of the servant of God recently. After completing his philosophical studies at Koonammavu, he was sent to Chethipuza for his 5 Fr. Varghese Koluthara, “Fr. Amatus CMI (1924-2008), A Chosen One to be on the Altar”, (A Seminar on Fr. Amatus, Carmel Bhavan, Mysuru) P.3.

25 theological formation in the year 1952 under Fr. Paulinus Jeerakathil CMI, the late bishop of Jagadalpur. He was ordained a priest on December 6, 1955. Rev. Frs. Manjus Kalapurakal CMI, E. C John CMI, and Thomas Kalarickal CMI were the other members of his batch.

Chapter 4 THE EARLY PRIESTLY SERVICE IN THE SACRED HEART PROVINCE, KALAMASSERY The first appointment of Fr. Amatus after his ordination in the congregation was in the year 1956, as the member and procurator of the Novitiate house at Ambazhakadu. After one year, in 1957, he was transferred to Karukutty Monastery as the Syriac teacher of the Novices there. Next year, in 1958 he was transferred to Vazhakkulam monastery as the procurator of the Monastery. After his service at Vazhakkulam for about one year, in 1959, he returned to Karukutty monastery and was appointed as the Assistant Novice Master together with the responsibility of teaching Syriac language. In the year 1960 he was appointed as the Prefect and the Syriac teacher of the students of philosophy at Koonammavu philosophate. This appointment was also for a one-year span. In 1961 again he was transferred back to Karukutty Monastery. From 1961 to 1970 for a period of nine years Fr. Amatus served Karukutty Monastery in the capacities of the Prefect, Syriac teacher, of the students, and Chaplain of the Carmelite Convent.

27 Having extraordinary mastery in Syriac language, Fr. Amatus was well appreciated as a teacher of the sacred language. He was much acclaimed during this period by both staff and students of the Novitiate House for his spiritual uprightness and zeal. He was popularly known as the Angel of the house. In the year 1970 he was elected as the Councilor for Pastoral Ministry of the Sacred Heart Province, Kalamassery and had to move to Sacred Heart Provincial House at Rajagiri, Kalamassery in the same year. In 1972, he again moved back to Karukutty Monastery as its Prior. He served the Monastery as its Prior for a period of three years, that is up to 1975. In the next three years he served as the member of the CMI house at Korandakkadu, belonging to the Province of Kalamassery. Fr. Amatus’ selection as the Provincial Councilor of the Province and later as the Prior of the Karukutty Monastery which was also the formation house for the novices were the signs of the unanimous approval of the members of the Province about his sincerity, truthfulness, and above all his exceptional religious spirit and sense of commitment to the Lord. He carried out his service as the financial councilor in a praiseworthy manner. Fr. Amatus served Karukutty Novitiate house almost fourteen years in various capacities like assistant

28 Novice Master, Syriac teacher, confessor, and the spiritual director of the Novices. Regarding his life as spiritual formator, Rev. Dr. Varghese Koluthara, one of his early students, and the present professor of canon law at Dharamaram Vidya Kshetram, Bangalore, who is also one of the Pontifical Consultants for Canon Law at Rome, writes: Immediately after his ordination, he was asked to be in the Novitiate to help the novices at St. Theresa’s Novitiate in Ambazhakkad. He was known as ‘the angel’ for the novices. He was a sincere religious to the core. They looked at him as a role model to learn the first lessons of religious life. In 1967 he was asked to be the Procurator at the monastery in Vazhakkulam. In 1968, he was asked to be teacher of Syriac language for scholastics at Koonammavu. From 1970-1972 he served as the councilor for Finance at S H Province, Rajagiri, Kalamassery. At the completion of his tenure as the councilor for Pastoral Ministry, he was transferred to Christ the King Novitiate at Karukutty. There he was teaching Syriac language to the novices and he

29 also served as their spiritual director and confessor. It was in 1973, that I met Fr. Amatus for the first time in my life. He was a great inspiration for all of us, novices. During the examination of Syriac language, if we were found struggling to answer them correctly, he used to help us to answer them through his affectionate promptings. For us novices, there were two strong pillars of spiritual inspiration, on which we could depend on and also confess our spiritual struggles at the Novitiate on those days. They were Fr. Amatus and Fr. Isaias. The parishioners of Karukutty used to address him as an ‘angelic priest.’ Fr. Romulus Payyappilly narrates: “while Fr. Amatus was at Karukutty, on an evening when he was coming from Mampra village to the monastery, a drunkard followed him till the door of the monastery calling him out that, “Here is our Lord Jesus Christ walking in front of me.” When Fr. Amatus opened the door to enter the Monastery the drunkard saluted him with a ‘praise be to Jesus Christ’ and went back.