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HEART OF A CHAMPION 233 DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK HOW MUCH OF YOUR DAY ARE YOU FOCUSING ON WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL VS WHAT YOU CAN’T CONTROL? Think about where you are putting your focus. To get awareness on this, a great strategy is to pay close attention to where you are putting your attention. Then, as- sign a percentage to how much time you want to focus on what you can control vs what you can’t control. Elite ath- letes focus 80% of the time on what they can control. During my first coaching session with Brian I was validated in that my mental game was pretty good. How- ever, he challenged me in ways no one ever had. In order to perform my best when it matters most, I must let go of the outcome in its entirety. This meant all the time: not just when I thought about it, or I had nothing to lose, or when things were going my way. When I decided to wholeheartedly let go of the outcome of attain- ing my goal as I competed, I rode into the roping box with peace. My peace came from shifting my focus to things I can control. I let go of everything else. “That’s why at the start of every season I always encouraged players to focus on the journey rather than the goal. What matters most is playing the game the right way and having the courage to grow, as human beings as well as basketball players. When you do that, the ring takes care of itself.” — PHIL JACKSON, AUTHOR OF ELEVEN RINGS: THE SOUL OF SUCCESS

234 DONENE TAYLOR Get BIG In one of our early Skype sessions, Brian asked me to stand up, and walk back and forth in front of the computer screen. Right away he started correcting my posture. He called out cues like, “Get your head up, throw your shoulders back, project your hips forward, and straighten your back.” He walked in front of the screen and demonstrated what he meant as he gave me verbal cues. As he was talking and walking, I realized the posture he was pre- scribing was remarkably similar to Lari Dee. The next day, I headed out to my horses to do my chores and I suddenly became aware of my posture. I thought, ‘Gosh! I’m looking down at the ground and my shoulders are hunched forward and I’m not walking out there, driving out there, like I’ve got a purpose.’ So, I picked myself up, raised my head up and threw my shoulders back. The next day, I went to the grocery store. I stepped out of my truck and I had the awareness once again that I had my head down and my shoulders rolled forward. I wasn’t looking up straight. I wasn’t walking in there like I had a purpose to buy those groceries. I decided to walk in the grocery store with big body language. It made me a little self- conscious, but I did it anyway. After that, I even kept my spurs on as a reminder to practice big body language. Even as I ran a simple errand, like going to the post office, I’d step out of my truck and think to myself, ‘Alright, head up, shoulders back, straight spine, hips kind of forward, walk in there with big body language.’ Understanding that my small body language was affecting my confi- dence helped me to shift over to big body language. I wanted to be confident like Lari Dee. Walking with big body language was new and outside of my comfort zone but I did it anyway. Each day I made the decision to use big body language whether I was roping, tying calves, doing laundry, making dinner, or running errands. I had a game plan and was sticking to it. Growing up, my mom would tell me, “Don’t you get too big for

HEART OF A CHAMPION 235 your britches.” Funny what you remember as a little kid, but it always stuck in my mind. It had become so deeply grooved in me that I needed to shrink back and not have a big presence. Being cocky or arrogant would not be tolerated at my parents’ house. Taking up more space, opening up my chest, straightening my spine, and looking straight ahead felt awkward. But I made the choice to act differently than how I felt. Brian explained that big body language was not me being cocky, arrogant, or trying to “one-up” anyone. Big body language helps me get into a confident state, so I can perform in my peak performance state. Brian coached me to understand that it wouldn’t work to simply reserve this stuff for the big event. Acting confident would be a lifestyle. I would need to practice it, a lot. Just like eating right, or exercising every day, I couldn’t expect to change it the day of my event. The same goes for my state of confidence.

236 DONENE TAYLOR DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK HAVE YOU EVER FELT LIKE YOU’RE MISSING YOUR CONFIDENCE? Have you ever said, “I lost my confidence,” or “I wish I could just get my confidence back,” or “I don’t feel confident today?” If so, I can relate. Now that I am a men- tal performance coach myself, I find that confidence is something that all of my cli- ents, at some time or other, struggle with. But Brian gave me another great strategy to help keep me committed to my com- mitment. This is something you can use too. The strategy is: Number 9: Confidence is something I do. Act differently than how I feel. I was going to master the five components of confidence: • Big Body Language • Focus • Positive Self-Talk • Clarity of Perspective • Preparation These were all things I needed to learn more about, and practice. But once I understood what made up confidence, I let go of my old way of thinking. I stopped looking for confidence. I stopped waiting to feel confident. I began “doing confidence.” “You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him discover it in himself.” — GALILEO, ITALIAN ASTRONOMER, PHYSICIST AND ENGINEER

HEART OF A CHAMPION 237 Embrace the Suck In one of our sessions, Brian asked me, “What would be something that could happen, unexpectedly, that would cause you adversity?” I hated that question. I didn’t want to talk about it. But he wanted to play devil’s advocate. I said, “Well, if I got hurt, that would be adversity.” He said, “What would you do?” I explained, “Well, I trust my doctor and my physical therapist. They would know what to do so I could complete.” I added, “I would compete anyway.” (I had not yet shared with Brian the adversity I was experiencing competing with my tumor and all the physical symptoms that came with it. I knew Brian had a no blaming, no complaining, no being de- fensive rule. There was no need to start now.) Brian asked, “What else?” I said, “Well, if one of my horses got hurt.” He asked, “What would you do?” I said, “That is why I bought two great horses. They are both out- standing. I would still be competitive.” The very thing I was describing had happened over the last two years. Chester and Rusty had each needed time off to recover from one thing or another. In previous years, when I only had one good horse, I would have to take down time while my horse recovered. After talking things through with Brian, I had to admit, it was useful. “You know,” I said, “even though it feels yucky to talk about the things that could go wrong, it feels good to address the elephant in the room.” “The point in doing this exercise was to show you there is always going to be adversity,” he explained. “It is always coming; we cannot stop it or avoid it. You must use adversity as your advantage.” I paused, giving Brian my “deer in the headlights” look. I had never heard such a phrase: Use adversity as my advantage. I thought, ‘That is crazy talk, no one wants adversity, we want to avoid adversity.’

238 DONENE TAYLOR “What do you mean?” I asked. “You will always encounter adversity,” explained Brian. “When you experience it, use the adversity as an opportunity to find the lesson in the situation. Applying what you’ve learned from the adverse situation will help keep you moving forward.” I thought about this. Then I told Brian, honestly, “I used to run from adversity, tried to avoid it, backed off from it. Heck, I even quit, at times.” And then it clicked. “I get it!” I exclaimed. “Find the lesson! Use it for my advantage! The adversity I experience may be the very thing I need to take the next crucial step forward.”

HEART OF A CHAMPION 239 DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK ARE YOU USING ADVERSITY AS YOUR ADVANTAGE? How do you respond to adversity? Are you using adversity to your ad- vantage? This strategy was key in helping me pro- cess adversity and it helped me stay commit- ted to my commitment. Number 10: Use adversity as my ad- vantage. Embrace the suck! As I learned this strategy, I found I loved ‘the suck.’ I began looking forward to the challenges, obstacles, struggles, mis- takes, failures. I began to understand that it was during these times I would ulti- mately learn, evolve, grow, and get better. I would use these opportunities to find the lesson, learn from it, and move forward. I had the awareness that I was learning much more from my mistakes than from my successes. That said, here is a sotto voce confession: Sometimes, I am not look- ing for any lesson in the adversity. Sometimes, adversity really, really, sucks. I feel hurt, mad, sad, and question why it happened. However, I have the ability to choose whether I stay in that destructive mindset or shift to a constructive mindset. Sometimes, the lesson in that terrible, horrific, unexplainable event is an opportunity to get mentally tougher. Sometimes, figuring out how to get back up after getting waylaid is the lesson. It’s my responsibility to take advantage of the adversity, do the work, and embrace the suck. “Adversity introduces a man to himself.” — ALBERT EINSTEIN, NOBEL PRIZE IN PHYSICS RECIPIENT

240 DONENE TAYLOR Raise Your Basement For years, I’d go to an event thinking, ‘Man, this roping will be tough, many World Champs are here, I need to rise to the occasion. I’d better bring my “A” game.’ But that didn’t work because I’d leave there thinking, ‘Man, I bombed.’ Brian taught me that when you compete under pressure, you don’t rise to the level of your competition, you sink to your lowest level of habits and training. He explained, “You compete at your basement level of habits and training. You raise your basement level while preparing.” I came to see that I hadn’t been bombing—I was competing at my level of preparation. My habits and training weren’t good enough, yet. I needed to raise my basement. In one of our sessions, Brian explained that every one of us gets the same, exact, amount of time during the week: 168 hours. One way I could separate myself from the competition is to take control of how I invest my time by carefully developing and practicing my daily routines. Brian encouraged me to make a list of my basic daily routines—the things I would do as part of my process in order to compete at my best. This would be my ‘168 Plan.’ At first I was resistant. Secretly, I thought, ‘I don’t need to write out a 168 Plan, I don’t need to write down my daily routine. I am 52 years old, I’m responsible and I know what to do each day.’ But I agreed to do it anyway. “What gets scheduled gets done,” Brian reminded me. “When you win the morning, you win the day.” So, I got to work. After our session, I developed a highly detailed 168 Plan for the following week. Right away it became clear to me that Brian was right! Looking at my 168 Plan in black and white immedi- ately tightened up my daily routine. A typical day looked something like this: 7:00 – 8:00 - Execute morning routine. (This would include: visualize

HEART OF A CHAMPION 241 roping runs before I get out of bed; write in my Five-Minute Journal; read from Brian’s book; ‘The Daily Dominator;’ Watch Brian Cain’s videos; meditate with the Headspace app; call the ‘Success Hotline;’ and eat breakfast.) 8:00 – 9:00 - Feed Chester and Rusty. Clean their paddocks. Put on Fly Sheets/Masks. Water everyone. Rope my dummy. Listen to the Daily Audio Bible while getting this done; then listen to audio recording of “Heads up Baseball.” 9:00 – 10:00 - Feed my calves and clean up the pen, then feed my Dad’s horses. Water everyone. Continue listening to audio book. 10:00 – 10:30 - Watch calf roping video. Study. Learn. 10:30 – 11:00 - Do housework. Start laundry. Listen to Brian Johnson’s Philosopher Notes, Brian Cain, anyone else that will move me forward. 11:00 – 12:15 - Workout. 12:15 – 1:00 – Shower and visualize. Dress. Eat lunch. 1:00 – 2:00 – Get mail. Do errands in town. Continue laundry/household chores. 2:00 – 2:30 - Rope dummy. 2:30 – 4:00 – Ride Chester – Purposeful Practice. Condition workout then rope sled behind 4-wheeler. Listen to audio book or lecture while saddling and unsaddling. 4:00 – 6:15 – Ride Rusty – Purposeful Practice. Warm-up, rope sled behind 4-wheeler then rope calves on Chester/Rusty. Listen to au- dio while saddling and unsaddling. 6:15 – 7:00 - Purposeful Practice tying calves from the post. 7:00 – 7:45 – Feed Chester and Rusty. Clean paddocks. Rope dummy. Lis- ten to audio; anything that will move me forward. 7:45 – 8:00 – Feed calves and my Dad’s horses. 8:00 – 10:00 – In house. Shower. Eat. Invest time with family. Read men- tal performance books. Do homework from Brian Cain. 10:00 – 11:00 - Check on my horses. Take off fly sheets/masks. Rope dummy.

242 DONENE TAYLOR 11:00 – Bed/Visualize as I drift off to sleep. Every morning when my feet hit the ground, I knew my plan, and I knew I’d do my very best to execute it. With my routine in place, I knew with confidence that I was pre- pared. I was prepared to reproduce under pressure what I had done countless times before in practice. No more wishing that this was my time, or rolling the dice hoping that lady luck would swing things my way. When the time came, I’d be ready. The last action items on my routine were important ones: visualize and sleep. In one conversation with Brian, I confessed, “I visualize while tak- ing a shower.” “Most elite athletes do,” he said. “If I was to put all my elite, World Champion, Mixed Martial Arts (MMA), athletes in the same room they would all find they do a lot of the same things, yet they believe they are the only ones doing them.” Investing time visualizing was another essential puzzle piece. I vis- ualized very vividly, going through different scenarios—not just the perfect run. I visualized how I would respond if something went wrong or off the rails. I knew how I would respond during any kind of situa- tion because no matter what it was, I had already mentally prepared. Watching roping videos helped me with my visualization, too. I visualized what it would look like before the run, and then watch the actual run. Then I’d watch it slow motion. Another thing I did was focus on a specific skill. For instance, how the roper rode into the box, the position of their left hand while leaving the box or releasing their rope, or where their eyes focused as they strung the front leg, how they

HEART OF A CHAMPION 243 kept the calf’s legs low as they gathered and tied. I picked out very specific things to watch and carefully observed. I used to watch the run as a whole; now I was breaking it down, taking notes. I had become a student. Meanwhile, I began to prioritize sleep. Brian explained how im- portant sleep is for athletes. He said, “Elite athletes do not have a work problem, they have a recovery problem.” During the week I intentionally got eight hours of sleep each night. I learned that sleep is when my muscles would grow stronger from my workouts and the imprinting from my visualization would occur. The roping practice I did before bed would be one of the most important practices I did all day, because my mind was going to process it all as I slept.

244 DONENE TAYLOR DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK WHAT CAN YOU DO TO HELP YOU RAISE YOUR BASEMENT OF PREPARATION, SO YOU CAN COMPETE AT YOUR BEST WHEN IT MATTERS MOST? As I worked my routines and practices, I developed my strengths. I also got outside my comfort zone, practiced new drills, and stayed focused to elimi- nate my weakest links. Sometimes while practicing, I caught very few calves or did not deliver my rope at all because I was focusing on skills other than catching. Over the twenty years of taking lessons from Troy, I noticed he viewed the world from a different lens than my- self. I tried to understand why he would say, or do, things the way he did, but I did not totally get it until I began working with Brian. Then it all began to tie together and make perfect sense. All those years, Troy had a growth mindset and I had a fixed mindset. We had each been processing the world from a different lens, a different point of view, a different mindset. As I continued working with Brian, I was rewiring my brain as I applied new mental performance strategies. As I continued to go to Troy’s for deliberate practice, I began to connect the dots as he encour- aged me to do new drills or even miss. I began to understand why Troy remained upbeat, even excited when things did not go as planned. Troy had always had this positive attitude, perspective, or view of the world. I was beginning to under- stand it. I had the awareness; I was attaining a growth mindset too. One afternoon, Troy told me, “It’s OK to miss. If someone is upset because you are missing, you may tell them they should probably leave

HEART OF A CHAMPION 245 because you plan on missing quite a few more. You are working things out.” No one had ever given me this advice—permission or even encour- agement to miss calves. The emphasis, since I was a little girl, had al- ways been on catching. I was learning that experiencing failure and learning from it is an important component of having a growth mind- set. I was getting outside my comfort zone, not being afraid to fail in the practice arena. In doing so, I was no longer outside my comfort zone when I competed. I was raising my level of training. The manner in how I prepared and trained by scheduling my 168 Plan dramatically raised the performance level I would sink to when I competed. What do you need to do to raise your own basement? “We do not rise to the level of our expectations. We fall to the level of our training.” — ARCHILOCHUS, GREEK POET AND SOLDIER

246 DONENE TAYLOR Train with Your End Goal in Mind Right after the Finals in Waco in 2015, I hated that I did not have the physical capabilities to efficiently handle the wild, larger, stronger calves at the Finals. But coming into the Finals unprepared—that was on me. It was my responsibility that I was not properly prepared. I understood how to get into shape. However, I knew that my pre- vious injuries were in part due to overuse—continuing to run when I was sore and hurt and lifting weights that were too heavy for me. I would have never consistently asked of my horses what I had demanded from myself. I would need to change my approach. To do so, I followed my 3 Steps of Performance Change: 1. develop awareness, 2. develop strategies, 3. and take massive action. First, I developed awareness. In this case, I gained the awareness that I needed to be in the best condition to tie calves. I didn’t need to just work out for the sake of a workout. It was time to get smart about my physical conditioning. I had to approach my physical conditioning the same way I worked on my mechanics, horsemanship skills, and elite mental game. Next, I strategized. I developed different workout routines that would develop great aerobic capacity, strength, agility, flexibility, and balance. I needed to work my fast twitch muscles. I needed to run 27 feet from my horse to the calf, and have the strength, and energy, and composure to flank and tie the calf and stay technically correct. Then, right after the Finals in Waco, I took action. I strength trained at least twice a week. I did things like front and back lunges, squats, and deadlifts. I’d do them all with weight—but not a crazy amount of weight. I had done that routine in 2013 and 2014 and I knew how that game ended—with tearing my right rotator cuff not once but twice and being chronically sore.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 247 I also strength trained my arms: deltoids, triceps, biceps, forearm muscles. I knew I needed to strengthen my entire back and chest mus- cles too. I also incorporated a lot of pushups, core exercises, agility- ladder drills, and balance drills on a Bosu ball and a large stabilization ball. In addition, I did a 3-mile walk/jog along a bike path near my house. When competing, I’d only need to run from my horse to the calf, so I practiced short sprints in the arena as I practiced tying calves from the post. I didn’t want to beat up my joints, knees, and hips, so I didn’t pound the pavement with running. I took care of my shoulders by incorporating the Thrower’s Ten Exercise Program to my routine. I worked out smart. I did cardio training three times a week. For my cardio, I mixed it up with a Jillian Michaels DVD and I did a Jane Fonda Step Aerobics VHS tape that my brother gave me for Christmas in 1993. It was a bit old, sure, but I loved that workout. It was great for my footwork, bal- ance, agility, and cardio. As a result of mixing up my workouts, I felt great. I knew when the calves were large, strong, and wild, I would have the extra strength I needed to keep myself in position and control the situation the best I could and as fast as I could. Of course, I also practiced. I practiced roping without a rope, pay- ing extra attention to the fine details of the motion of both arms. I focused on seeing my right hand turn over, pulling my hand back to the right side of my head, turning my wrist backward, then ‘shutting the door,’ as Lari Dee would say. I focused on keeping everything on the right side, swinging big with momentum, and then swinging the loop around the calf’s neck. I paid extra attention to what my left hand and arm were doing as well. These techniques really came from studying consistently with Lari Dee. I’d practiced throwing my rope for decades, but Lari Dee taught me the delivery as swinging it around the calf’s neck. I practiced doing it her way again and again.

248 DONENE TAYLOR I really studied the position of all my body parts and paid attention to how my body felt as I worked through the motions. I even practiced my routines without a calf or a horse. My goal was to get them auto- matic and consistent. I practiced taking a breath as if I was riding into the box to rope. Even when I was not officially roping, I was roping. I intentionally invested time throughout my day to focus on these drills. Another practice drill went like this: I would run down a pretend rope, block a pretend calf, flank him, string the front leg, get in position to gather and tie the legs, and then throw my hands in the air. I did this a lot. One summer afternoon I was tying this imaginary, invisible calf down our driveway. I was running through all the proper sequential motions. When it was time for a break, I walked into the house. Turns out Roper had been watching me. He gave me a funny look. “What are you doing, Mom?” “I’m just practicing my tying without a calf.” He looked at me strangely. “Okaaaaaay,” he said, as though he wasn’t sure. I just smiled and explained that was how I practiced. “Did it look funny?” I asked. “Kind of,” he admitted. What must have looked weird to Roper was actually good practice for me. It was a way I could work out what I needed to focus on. Things like my footwork or getting a good block. I visualized intently as I did this. It was like I could actually see, hear, feel, the calf, the rope, the front leg, the piggin’ string, how the calf’s legs are positioned before I gather them, how they look when they are gathered, and how my body was positioned. I was also really in touch with my body—I could feel all my muscles engaged. It was real to me. I had done this type of practice before—back in my goat tying days. As a kid, I somehow knew to do this instinctively. It’s like an open-eye visualization where you’re actually making the moves. It’s called “shad- owing,” or “dry mechanics practice.”

HEART OF A CHAMPION 249 I could do mental reps anywhere and anytime. Usually, no one knew I was getting in mental reps. I did them when I was practicing with other ropers or prior to competing. For instance, as other ropers rode into the box to rope, mentally I worked my box routine as I watched them. I took my 6- 2-8 breath and told myself what I would say. I mentally scored the calf as I watched it leave the chute. Practicing mental reps without a rope, a horse, or calf helped me to focus only on the process. With no outcome to worry about I could get in some shadowing mental reps; I could practice dry mechanics, and visualiza- tion. During these mental reps I locked into my routine: my breathing, my mechanics, my tempo, what my body was feeling, what I was thinking. In addition to my ‘mental reps,’ I roped the dummy in my barn four different times throughout the day. Sometimes I’d plan to practice for 15 minutes, and before I knew it, an hour had gone by. Before bed, I’d check on Chester and Rusty and rope my Nex rop- ing dummy, one last time. I’d turn off the lights and rope it in the dark. It was then I really tuned into the feel of my rope, and the feel of my swing and delivery. Afterwards, I would go to bed and visualize calf roping runs, all different scenarios, as I drifted off to sleep. Each time I practiced I was not looking for perfection. Instead, I was working on being my best version of myself. I practiced my riding and roping but also how I handled things when they didn’t go as planned. If I messed up, or the session went badly, would I get mad? Would I get frustrated, would I beat myself up, would I want to quit, would I think about not competing, would I go to the house and be miserable to be around? Nope. Those days were over once and for all.

250 DONENE TAYLOR DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK ARE YOU TRAINING TO FEEL BETTER, OR TO GET BETTER? Think about this: Are you doing the specific training you need to do in order to move towards your end goal? Brian told me frequently, “Do a little a lot, not a lot a little.” I invested time thinking about this little phrase and what it meant for me. I remember a quote from when I was a little girl, “Eating an apple a day, keeps the doctor away.” It occurred to me that the phrase isn’t, “Eat seven apples on Sunday.” Brian called it spaced repetition. For me, this meant showing up con- sistently every day and doing the spe- cific work that will help get me better in the things that will help me attain my goal. I was gaining awareness of what I needed to do in order to close the gap between where I was to where I needed to be. I even had a special sign made: “Don’t practice until you get it right. Practice until you can’t get it wrong.” I was disciplined in doing all the proper training in order to reach my end goal. I was reverse engineering: constructing a plan of the steps I needed to take to move towards my goal. I was training with my end goal in mind instead of just going out to practice. “Success comes from knowing that you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.” — JOHN WOODEN, LEGENDARY BASKETBALL COACH

HEART OF A CHAMPION 251 The Secret Is in Your Routine Throughout my whole roping career, I never had a consistent routine or a process when it came to my performance. At least, I never thought about it that way. At every event, I’d ride into the box in mostly the same way every time, but there were variations. It would be a little bit different from one rodeo to the next. Especially if it was higher stakes. I would do things differently at a bigger rodeo than at a smaller competition. My thoughts varied considerably as well. I thought about how fast I needed to be, or what I did not want to have happen. Or I’d say to myself, “All I have to do is catch,” or “Don’t screw up,” “Don’t break out,” or “I have to win.” I had no script for my self-talk. Brian explained that routines lead to consistency, and consistency helps us get to a confident state. A confident athlete will have more success, because they can put themselves in a ‘Peak Performance State.’ Winning is all about getting yourself in a peak performance state so that you can perform your best when it matters most. In addition to my 168 Plan, I needed to refine my performance routine. Brian encouraged me to write out my performance routines and email them to him. Once again, I have to admit I felt a bit resistant. I thought, ‘I’ve been competing for decades, I already know how to get ready to perform. I don’t need to write it down.’ “The bigger the goal, the tighter your routine needs to be,” explained Brian. “If you can’t describe your process, then you do not have a process.” I knew my goal was huge. I knew I could not describe my process as it was not consistent. And I trusted Brian. I began developing my process right after my coaching session. It took me some time to develop my routines and get them just right. But when I did, I doubled down, and tripled down on them: I practiced and visualized them all the time. I had a lot of time to make up for, so I wasn’t going to waste a second. Once again, I put the three steps of performance change

252 DONENE TAYLOR (awareness, strategizing, and taking massive action) into practice. I began gaining awareness by making a list, and for a while I even took notecards into the practice arena with me and made notes as I worked to figure out my performance routines. I developed strategies by recording things like what I was thinking about as I walked into the roping box, what was I telling myself, where I would take a big breath, what my focal point was as I exhaled my breath, and so on. After gaining awareness and strategizing, I developed my perfor- mance routines and put them into action. I did my best to allow myself two hours of preparation time before I competed. However, I knew there would be times when I wouldn’t have two hours; at times, I’d have less than an hour of preparation. I had different routines in place for different situations. My 2-hour performance routine looked like this: PERFORMANCE ROUTINE First Hour 1. Meditate with Headspace App. 2. Gain Awareness of my Internal Performance State – listen to music/video playlist as I prepare. 3. Groom Horse: brush, clean out feet, braid tail. 4. Stretch horse. 5. Saddle. 6. Gather all my gear together: jerk line, horse boots, pack bag. 7. Rope Nex dummy. 8. Tie Lukky calf. 9. Pick out a rope that feels good. 10. Quick 10 – 15-minute workout: burpee with push-ups, quick sprint. Get Big and increase heart rate – burn off excess energy or increase energy level. 11. Get dressed, shirt, money, belt, hat, knife.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 253 12. Put boots on horse and neck rope. 13. Gather gear bag, rope can, pigging string. 14. Hang bridle and tie down on saddle. 15. Go to arena with horse and gear. Second Hour 1. Check the draw and inspect my draw. 2. Warm up horse for 25 minutes. 3. Get him a drink. 4. Get me a drink. 5. Check in with myself: What do I need? Bathroom, Get Big, additional workout, music, breathe, self-affirmations. 6. Reset saddle and or horse boots. 7. Finish his warm-up: move his front feet, work rope, stop and back up. Make sure he will fire. 8. Tie on rope. Attach jerk-line, if needed. 9. Practice relaxed breathing. Visualize my highlight reel. 10. Get Big!!! Power Pose with hands on hips (open up chest with Piggin’ String Stretch or Victory Pose on horse) DO WHAT IT TAKES!! 11. Keep on with the positive self-talk and affirmations and breathe. 12. Ready!! Moments before I rope 1. Visualize/Say my ABC’s of Focus: ‘Ride Bumper to Bumper, Feel My Tip, Take My Hand to the Calf’s Neck’. 2. Tighten cinches and boots; quick visual overview of all gear. 3. Powder rope, if needed. 4. Swing rope and measure loop. 5. Put pigging string in mouth and place rope under my arm. 6. Walk into arena in confident state – Big Body Language, Focus, Positive Self-Talk.

254 DONENE TAYLOR 7. Get to box and check my calf number. 8. Walk into the box: Stop...Breath in for 6 counts, Hold for 2 counts, Exhale for 8 counts. 9. Think/Say... ‘Trust Myself’. 10. Turn horse around and back into the corner. 11. Big breath in and then out—blow breath out to calf’s neck. Focus on My Target. 12. Final TIF: Think, Imagine or Feel my start so I will score sharp. 13. Wait for calf to stand up and look straight ahead. 14. Nod for calf. 15. See start. 16. Begin Swing. I thought of and used my above performance routine as a script. I printed off this script and kept a copy in my barn and in my horse trailer in my tack room. I memorized it. And I stuck to it. When I had a negative thought, I refused to allow it to set up shop in my mind. I pushed out any negative thought with my ready-made script. I had something great, already in place. Just like as an actor would use a script to deliver an award-winning performance, I too, had my script to follow. An actor also has a set routine they use to transition themselves into the character they are playing. An actor has a job to do no matter what they have going on in their lives, baby mama drama, any number of woes or worries, paparazzi shenanigans, etc. I did not have any of that going on in my life! How- ever, there were times that I arrived at the competition road weary and tired, concerned about my family at home, having experienced troubles on the road, or not feeling 100%. It was in those times that my perfor- mance routines became invaluable and I was glad I did all the preliminary work as Brian suggested. My routines helped me make the transition from girl scout to Bounty Hunter, mom to Warrior, kitty cat to Bad Cat. Included in my routine to make the transition was to meditate,

HEART OF A CHAMPION 255 listen to music and video playlists, and an exercise routine. I had a va- riety of meditations, playlists, and exercise routines I could go to help me transition to my peak performance state. I knew who in my inner circle I could go to, visit with or call, to help me make this transition. Brian explained, “We have the responsibility to find our own Inter- nal Performance State (IPS). We have the ability to respond to get to where we need to be when we need to be there.” I learned the IPS is subjective. Every one of us is different. Brian told me that, “The competitor uses their awareness to deter- mine where on the IPS scale they perform their best. Then they must do what it takes to get to that state, so they can perform their best when it matters most.” Brian explained IPS as a scale from 1-10. Working with Brian, I discovered that my IPS is either a 7 or an 8. If I’m less than a 7 and I don’t have enough intensity, my heart is not beating fast enough, and my mind is wandering. But if I’m more than an 8, I’m too emotional, too attached to the outcome, or my head is cluttered with past and fu- ture thoughts, and scenarios. However, if I am a 7 or 8, I can feel my heart beating, my mind has present moment focus, and I’ve successfully made the transition to a Bad Cat Competitor. It’s in that state that I’m ready to perform my best when it matters most! With my routines in place, I learned to stop thinking about how fast I needed to be, how the other competitors were performing, or how much I needed to win. Instead I thought about my process—the steps I need to take in order to perform my best. I constantly thought about WIN: “What’s Important Now.” Brian told me, “There are 84,600 seconds in a day. We need to live our life moment by moment. Moments make up the hours, hours make up the days, days make up the weeks, weeks make up the months, months make up the years. It all starts with a moment.” I learned to ask myself: ‘What can I do right now to perform my

256 DONENE TAYLOR best in the present moment?’ When I rode into the roping box and I took my 6-2-8 Breath, it was then I flipped the switch. I went from thinking mode to trusting mode. The hay was already in the barn. I had done all the work. I was prepared. There was nothing else I could do to prepare any further. I had invested a lot time in developing my routines. As I worked through my routines, I wasn’t checking off the boxes—it simply became automatic. I began thinking of my routines like taking a shower. When taking a shower, we know what we need to do to get great results. We have our very own, customized routine or system that ensures we will step out of the shower fresh and clean. We know what to do and we just do it. That’s how I processed my routines when I competed. I didn’t overthink them. No matter what was going on inside of me or around me, my rou- tines helped me ‘do confidence’ and perform in my peak performance state. When it was time to compete, I put it all together: let my hair down, have fun, and trust what I brought with me. I could trust myself, trust my horse, trust my preparation, and trust my process. I could com- pete freely, uninhibited, enjoying the moment and letting it happen.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 257 DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK DO YOU HAVE YOUR DAILY ROUTINES AND PERFORMANCE ROUTINES WRITTEN OUT AND COMMITTED TO MEMORY? I would not have written out my daily routines and performance rou- tines had it not been for Brian. He helped me see how other elite athletes used this strategy to enhance their performance. This method became another strat- egy in my toolbox: Lesson 11: Develop and be disci- plined to my routines—Daily routines and performance routine My performance routine took practice to develop. I used my awareness and strategized, taking note of many observations, past and present, what worked and what needed work as I devel- oped my routines. I invested time locking down what worked best for me, doing things like practicing riding my horse in and out of the box without a calf in the chute, and making notecards. But the time I invested was worth it! I received a huge ROI—return on my investment. My routine gave me consistency. I already knew what I would think, say, and do. The consistency in my preparation and performance routine helped me do confidence, there was no doubt, fear or anxiety. I focused on WIN – What’s Important Now. To find your own routines, start by writing them down. Then use your awareness to see how you can fine-tune them for better results. Try an- swering the following questions in your own journal after a practice or event:

258 DONENE TAYLOR • What went well? • What could have gone better? • How will I do things differently next time? • What did I learn? “If you are persistent, you will get it. If you are consistent, you will keep it.” — UNKNOWN

HEART OF A CHAMPION 259 Sharpen Your Ax Brian sent me a book called The Five-Minute Journal by Intelligent Change—a great journal that includes prompts to help begin the jour- naling process. In it, Brian wrote, “You are a World Champion.” I embraced this notion—that even though I had not yet achieved my goal, I was already a World Champion. Each morning, I would write down and say aloud, “I am the 2016 Women’s Professional Rodeo Association World Champion Tie- Down Calf Roper.” For decades, I’d been telling myself, ‘When I become a World Cham- pion I will….’ I was waiting to become a World Champion before I acted like one. But Brian was teaching me that I needed to think of myself as a World Champion right now. I learned I must adopt the habits, training, and mindset of a World Champion. Before I could ac- tually become the World Champion, I needed to believe I was already one. From there, I was able to act the way a World Champion would act. “Thoughts become things,” said Brian. “You must act differently than you feel.” I reflected on this a lot. I asked myself, ‘How would a World Cham- pion practice, think, work out, eat, and sleep?’ ‘How would a World Champion talk to themselves?’ ‘Who would be in a World Champion’s inner circle?’ ‘How would a World Champion carry themselves and respond in times of adversity and triumph?’ These behaviors informed many of my routines. I also wrote out other affirmations to think like and act like the person I needed to be- come the World Champion. I wrote things like, ‘I am confident, cou- rageous, enough, strong, brave, focused, and positive.’ Every morning as I got out of bed, I said my affirmations out loud. This helped me get focused and set the tone for day. I was filling myself up with the high energy, positive attitude and focused intention I needed to, as Brian would say, “Dominate the Day.”

260 DONENE TAYLOR Still, there was one piece of the puzzle I hadn’t mastered yet. That was meditation. At the time, it was totally foreign to me. One day, Brian asked me, “Have you ever meditated?” I said, “No, I never have.” Brian asked, “Would you try it for 10 days?” I didn’t hesitate. I said, “Yes, I would!” Brian turned me onto the Headspace Meditation App. As I practiced meditation, I noticed some very real changes in my life. I become more present with my family, friends, and in day-to-day activities. I learned that I was in control of my own thoughts; my thoughts didn’t need to drift to places I didn’t want them to go. I could gently bring my thoughts back to the present moment when I was practicing, preparing to compete, and competing. Meanwhile, I began giving myself grace and stopped all the nega- tive self-talk from the years before. I learned to talk to myself like I would with my best friend. I was no longer at the whim of my destruc- tive emotions and random thoughts. As I practiced meditating, I learned how to breathe properly, and I learned the benefits of the breath. Most times, taking a big “6-2-8” breath gave me the time I needed to respond—instead of react—to an event. This meant I would breathe in for the count of 6, hold for 2, and breathe out for 8. This simple act of conscious breathing allowed me to choose how I would respond to the events of each day. Affirmations and meditation became an important part of achiev- ing my ‘champion headspace.’ It felt so empowering to be in control of all the things I could con- trol and let go of everything else. I was finally thinking, acting, and believing in myself like a legit World Champion.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 261 DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK COULD A SELF-DISCOVERY JOURNEY LEAD YOU TO YOUR GOALS? Journaling, affirmations, meditation—all these things helped me move forward in some unexpected ways. In addition to the Five-Minute Jour- nal, I kept a Performance Journal where I would write about what I observed and learned. Getting my thoughts onto pa- per helped me unscramble what was in my head. I could see it on paper, make logical, reality-based sense of it, strate- gize and take action on it, instead of keeping it in my head and ruminating over it again and again. Experts have discovered we each can have 12,000 – 60,000+ thoughts per day. Research shows that as many as 95 percent of these thoughts are the same or similar as the day before. Research also indicates that 80 percent of our thoughts are negative. That last statistic used to be me. Once I changed my mindset, my life got instantly better, deeper, richer, fuller. Just like all the other changes I was making, it was a choice. It took practice. It was difficult. It was challenging. But it was totally worth the benefits I received! For so long, I waited for other people to fill me up with affirma- tions. Sometimes, my affirmation fuel tank ran on half full or empty because I wasn’t getting what I needed from other people. Taking ac- tion and filling up my own affirmation fuel tank was a game changer for me. When I stopped waiting for other people to validate that I was doing good, or I was enough, or I could achieve my goal, I began mak- ing considerable gains. I began to wholeheartedly know that I am worthy, I am enough, I am loved—regardless of whether I am a World Champion, weigh the

262 DONENE TAYLOR correct number on a scale, or people are filling up my affirmations fuel tank with compliments or validations. I didn’t fully realize it at the time, but I was on a self-discovery journey! I revisited the mindset of that whimsical little girl who first had the big dream to become a World Champion! I invested time in this self-discovery process. No one could do this self-discovery process for me. I was becoming someone I had never been before. If you’re working to reach a bold goal, I encourage you to open yourself up to your own self-discovery process. Be open to thinking and acting differently. It could be the game-changer you’ve been waiting for. “Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the ax.” — ABRAHAM LINCOLN, 16TH PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES

HEART OF A CHAMPION 263 Green Means Go! To perform your best, when it matters most, you must be present. For many years, I wasn’t really present during my events: I was replaying my last run or jumping ahead and hoping or worrying about what was coming next. That all changed when Brian gave me a strategy to use called, “Recognizing Your Signal Lights.” The strategy begins in the ‘preparation’ part of my routine. When I’m preparing to perform, I must be aware of my body language, focus, self-talk, and how I feel physically. Just like traffic signal lights, he taught me to recognize my own green, yellow, and red signal lights. Here’s how the “Recognizing Your Signal Lights” strategy works for me. Just like with driving, a green signal light means go. It means everything is good. I experience a green signal light when I’m in a con- fident state, my body is energized, and my horses and I are performing well. My focus is in the present moment, my self-talk is positive, and I’m in control of my thoughts and emotions. I have a green light when I’m breathing big, trusting what I have, and my heart is grateful. But, as with driving, if you come upon a yellow signal light, you need to either slow down or speed up. When I have a yellow signal light, there’s something going on with me that needs attention. For me, having that recognition may mean I have uncertainty of my plan, my focus is not in the present moment, or I’ve made a mistake. My self- talk is negative, and I’ve allowed negative thoughts and emotions into my mind. When my jaw clenches, my shoulders hike upward, or my energy is dwindling, I have a yellow light. When we’re driving and we approach a red signal light, we must stop. If we don’t, there is a great possibility we will crash and burn. I may be at risk of a red light if I’ve experienced multiple challenges, struggles, obstacles or adversities, or I’m sleep-deprived. For me a red light looks like a lot of emotion—if I’m teary-eyed or full out crying, that is a red light. On a red light, my focus is either in the past or future, and negative thoughts and emotions are driving my behavior. My self-

264 DONENE TAYLOR talk is negative, and I am believing it. My mind is cluttered with random chatter, my body is tense, energy is low, and my breathing is shallow. I’m thinking, ‘Let’s just get it over with and be done with it,’ or I’m feeling sorry for myself, blaming others, complaining, or being defensive. Unattended, yellow or red signal lights will have dire consequences. A yellow or a red light for me means I am not in control of myself. As Dr. Ken Ravizza said, “You must be in control of yourself before you can control your performance.” We are all different in how we interpret a green, yellow, or red sig- nal light. What may be a green, yellow, or red light for me may be a different color or state for another competitor. For instance, when I catch a calf less than perfect—say it’s a sloppy loop but it still works— this is a yellow light for me. However, in visiting with other ropers, I’ve learned that for some people, making a sloppy catch or having a less than perfect catch can be a green light. They’ll feel excited that it worked out in their favor. We all are unique and interpret situations differently. It was important for me to develop the awareness of my own signal lights. Always, it’s my responsibility to make the adjust- ments needed to get back on green. An example of a red-light situation was when I was in Guthrie, Oklahoma, at the Lazy E Arena, May of 2015—that time I stepped off the left side of Chester instead of the right side, and the jerk line pulled me down onto my butt. Immediately afterwards I was embarrassed, my self-talk turned to self-loathing, and I was defensive. I was truly in a bad place, mentally, emotionally, physically. I cried uncontrollably for a very long time afterwards. The tie-down roping event was a one-header that evening. If there had been another opportunity to rope again that evening I would have lost before it even started. My focus was on the previous run. I kept replaying my mistake over and over and over again in my mind. Heck, I even rode the fence, thinking of quitting because of that one particular run.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 265 Having a red light is not a place I want to stay. It is dangerous. If I stay here, I will beat myself. After Guthrie, it took me a solid 72 hours to release that roping run and refocus. At that time, releasing and getting refocused in 72 hours was a personal record for me. Working with Brian, I learned a strategy called “release and refocus” to move from a yellow or red light back to a green light within seconds. I customized my release and refocus routines to fit me and my sit- uations. I practiced them as I roped the dummy, visualized, shadow practiced, and roped the sled or live cattle. The more I practiced, the more automatic it became to do them when I had a yellow or red light while competing. My release and refocus routine gave me something to go to when “stuff hit the fan,” and I quickly got back to a green light. There are three steps to the release and refocus routine: Step #1: Do a physical action with an association. The association is the personal meaning and or value I attach to the physical action. It can be charged with a positive emotion or thought. Or connected to a person, place or thing. The association can be my big reason why I’m running down this bold goal. When I’m outside the arena, a physical action may be: • Resetting my saddle; loosening my cinches and re-tightening, • Re-adjusting my splint boots; Opening the Velcro and reat- taching • Intentionally tightening up my muscle groups and then inten- tionally relaxing each group • Taking off my hat and putting it back on, or • Picking up a dirt clod, crushing it in my hand and releasing it to the ground.

266 DONENE TAYLOR When I’m inside or outside of the arena or in the roping box, a physical action may be: • Smiling • Slapping my leg • Riding my horse ahead in the roping box, even turning him around, and resetting him in the corner, or • Stroking my horse’s mane or petting him. Step #2: Take a big breath on a focal point. To do this, I breathe in for 6 counts, hold for 2 counts, exhale and relax for 8 counts, while looking at predetermined focal point. The focal point acts an anchor to remind me I’ve done the work, the hay is in the barn. My predetermined focal point helps me maintain present mo- ment focus. A focal point may be: • My horse’s mane • The space between my horse’s ears • A specific spot in the arena, on the fence, or on my saddle. Step #3: Say a verbal trigger(s). This involves saying an affirmation, or a cue to myself. Most of the time it takes me more than one verbal trigger to get back to a green light status. (It takes what it takes.) My verbal triggers can range from A to Z: A. I am prepared. B. I got this. C. So What – Next calf. D. I’m OK. E. I am focused.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 267 F. Control what I can control. G. Process over outcome. H. I am a World Champion. I. Act Big – Breath Big – Commit Big J. Go all out! K. Stay in my lane. Compete don’t compare. L. What’s Important Now. M. I trust myself – my horse – my preparation – my process. N. Ride bumper to bumper. O. Feel my tip. P. Take my hand to the calf’s neck. Q. It’s not over yet! R. I am a Bad Cat! S. Bubble up and say something which I am grateful for. (Being grateful instantly lowers our stress level.) T. I love doing this. U. I would not want to be anywhere else than right here – right now. V. I am blessed. W. I love this little horse. X. I am going to learn today. Y. Mistakes do not define me as a person. Z. Roping is what I do. It is not who I am. Having my positive, grateful, informative verbal trigger(s) already picked out keeps my focus where it needed to be. My predetermined script of positive self-talk, constructive, and empowering thoughts shuts the gate on the random thoughts, destructive emotions and self- talk of negativity, fear, doubt, anxiety, regret. Having a routine keeps me in control of my thoughts and emotions. When I have a green light, I don’t need to do the release and refocus routine. There is nothing to release. I am right where I need to be. A

268 DONENE TAYLOR green light means I am in my peak performance state. All I need to do in that state is refocus. The refocus occurs as I ride into the box, getting ready to compete. I take a 6-2-8 Breath and blow it out towards a special spot on my horse’s mane and say, “I trust myself.” Then I have a Final TIF: Thought, Image, or Feeling. My Final TIF occurs as I am backed into the corner of the roping box. As I look at my calf, I take a breath and blow it out at my target—the calf’s neck. Then, I have a final thought, image, or feeling of what my start will be so I will score my calf sharp. When I was first learning this strategy and started practicing it, I was totally out of my comfort zone. But I realized that being able to recognize, release, refocus and stay in the present is really the difference between people who compete, and people who compete their best when it matters most. My recognize, release and refocus routine prepared me to take charge of my situation, no matter what was going on. Attaching an association or meaning to my release and refocus routine is how I learned to immediately let go of whatever event is triggering a yellow or red light. I wipe the slate clean. I am ready to trust what I got.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 269 DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK WHAT ARE YOUR SIGNAL LIGHTS? When driving, would you disregard the traffic signal lights? Of course, you wouldn’t! So why disregard your own signal lights in life, or competition? Applying this strategy was a game changer for me. It helped me stay com- mitted to my commitment as I worked to attain my mission. In fact, I added it to my list of regular strategies. It be- came… Strategy 12: Recognize my signal lights—Apply a release and refocus rou- tine. I would check in with myself regu- larly to recognize my signal lights and understand where I’m at physi- cally, mentally, emotionally, and situationally. This can take a little time, but I’ve found that time can be one of my best friends. I invested time making an inventory list describing what each signal light looked like when I had experienced it. Getting to know my signal lights was a great self-awareness exercise that allowed me to recognize my signal lights quickly. It is our responsibility to take the appropriate action to ensure we are on green before we compete. You can use this method too. Here’s a method to recognize your own signal lights. (For each signal light, list your relevant descriptions.)

270 DONENE TAYLOR What is my body language like, when I have a ... Green Light Yellow Light Red Light Where is my focus, when I have a ... Green Light Yellow Light Red Light What does my self-talk sound like, when I have a ... Green Light Yellow Light Red Light How does my body feel when I have a ... Green Light Yellow Light Red Light What is the situation / what is going on when I have a ... Green Light Yellow Light Red Light

HEART OF A CHAMPION 271 What is my perspective, point of view, when I have a … Green Light Yellow Light Red Light Consistently checking in with myself and understanding the im- portance of recognizing my signal lights changed how I practiced and competed. No longer would it be a roll the dice for how I would show up for myself. I stopped allowing distractions, drama, random thoughts, or other noise dictate how I performed. I consider this strat- egy my lifeline when “stuff hits the fan.” This strategy is also important to me outside of the arena. I use it throughout my day while practicing, interactions with family, working with people, experiencing the ups and downs of life. “Don’t look back – you’re not going that way.” — MARY ENGELBREIT, GRAPHIC ARTIST AND ENTREPRENEUR

272 DONENE TAYLOR Stay Sparked Ever since I committed to my strategy of “Get addicted to positivity,” I’d been filling my barn with something I called Signs of Success (SOS)—positive, inspirational, motivational signs. I wanted to be able to look anywhere in my barn and be surrounded by positivity, inspira- tion, and motivation. I intuitively knew I needed this. It had been so easy for me to get discouraged in the past and take a break, even quit, when I encountered struggles, challenges, obstacles, adversity. I needed to immerse myself in positivity. As I traveled across several states to compete, I started keeping my eyes out for different signs with quotes and positive messages on them. I knew what I was looking for and I began to sniff them out, one by one. Meanwhile, as I read and listened to great books, and radio shows, I begin writing down the sayings and quotes that resonated with me. It became apparent that I wasn’t going to stumble on signs with all the sayings that were inspiring me. I was certain that when I heard Don Imus quoting Joe Beaver, “Anyone can rope. You win from the neck up,” I wasn’t going to see that quote on a sign at a shop. Nor would I see Les Brown’s quote, “The temptation to quit will be greatest just before you are about to succeed,” or Diana Nyad’s speech as she completed her iconic swim, “Never ever give up, you are never too old to chase your dreams,” or the quote I saw on Lari Dee’s Facebook page, “Hard work isn’t for eve- ryone; neither are World Titles.” Then one day, I found a hidden shop in downtown Casper, Wyo- ming called, ‘Girl in Air.’ I met the owner of the shop, Michelle, who used to be a flight attendant. She and I instantly hit it off. I told her about my mission of decorating my barn. “If I brought you quotes, could you paint the quotes on large wooden signs?” I asked. She enthusiastically agreed. I gave Michelle full creative rein and boy; did she ever deliver! The signs she made lit up my barn and kept the spark lit up in me.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 273 Every time I picked up an order of 6 – 8 signs, I’d have another list of quotes for her to start on. One year, the week before Christmas, Michelle had a large order ready for pick up. On Christmas Day, with frigid temperatures and much snow, Stan agreed to hang each of them up. My barn was really starting to come together and so was my new attitude. You might say my attitude was determining my altitude! Decorating my barn was really great practice for appreciating the process of competing. It seemed that the right sign always came at just the right time, just like the roping and mental skills I was learning. I acquired and hung up one sign at a time just like I acquired and mas- tered one skill set at a time. In the beginning, I had a vision for my barn, and I wanted it fin- ished ASAP. It took me a while, but eventually I adopted the mindset that I will never be finished decorating it. My barn will always be a work in progress. And I love it that way. Similarly, I fell in love with the process of roping and competing. Eventually I acquired the mindset that I’ll never be finished. I’ll never have the complete roping skill set or mental skill set. I will always be acquiring new knowledge, and evolving myself into a better horseman, roper, and competitor. My life’s journey will never be finished as long as I can take a breath. The following quotes have hung in my barn from the beginning. They’ve each had great impact and influence on me, helping me con- tinue to move forward and take the next step towards my goal. The first is: “Difficult things take time; impossible things take a little longer.” I found this sign in Clovis, New Mexico, in April 2013. On it is an old-time photo of a cowgirl... steer wrestling! At the time that I found it, I had no idea how I was going to attain my goal to win the World. I just knew, ‘someday I would.’ This sign screamed at me, ‘It will be hard. It will be difficult. It will be challenging. It will be worth it. Stick with it.’

274 DONENE TAYLOR The second quote is: “If it’s not happening now, it’s just not happening yet.” I first read this quote from an article that Stran Smith, 2008 PRCA World Champion Tie-Down Roper, wrote. I had this sign made spe- cial. The word ‘Yet’ jumped out at me every day from this sign. I knew my goal would happen; I needed to keep being wildly, ambitiously, pa- tient as I worked hard and smart. I needed to stay persistent. This sign has extra meaning to me as Stran learned this quote from his great friend, Shawn McMullan. Shawn died in an auto accident on Au- gust 17, 1996 in Oregon. He and Stran were rodeoing together at the time. Even though I didn’t know all the steps I needed to attain my goal, those two signs kept me in the process of strategizing, making a plan, and taking the action. They gave me HOPE: Hold On, Possibilities Exist. My barn is like a Motivational Dojo. The vibe I get in my barn is the same excitement, focus, and intention I get when I take lessons at Troy’s or Lari Dee’s. We all require different strategies to bring out our best self each day; it takes what it takes, and my barn has helped me get there each day. The following is a partial speech given by Theodore Roosevelt on April 23, 1910, in Paris, France titled, Man in the Arena, and a poem, written by William Ernest Henley in 1875, titled, Invictus. Both are framed and hanging in my barn. They have special significance to me. MAN IN THE ARENA “It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great

HEART OF A CHAMPION 275 enthusiasm, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” INVICTUS Out of the night that covers me, Black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank whatever gods may be For my unconquerable soul. In the fell clutch of circumstance I have not winced nor cried aloud. Under the bludgeoning of chance My head is bloody, but unbowed. Beyond this place of wrath and tears Looms but the Horror of the shade, And yet the menace of the years Finds, and shall find me, unafraid. It matters not how strait the gate, How charged with punishments the scroll, I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul. All the Signs of Success—SOS—I have hanging up in my barn and my horse trailer became something like a coach. Reading my signs as I pre- pared to compete gave me a checkup from the neck up. I took respon- sibility for my mental game. I was no longer reacting, allowing my

276 DONENE TAYLOR feelings, thoughts, and emotions to run the show. I had specific strate- gies and tools to go to, and my SOS reminded me to be disciplined and execute my plan.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 277 DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK WHAT STRATEGY COULD YOU USE TO HELP YOU BECOME THE BEST VERSION OF YOU? All of us are unique and it takes different strategies to keep each of us sparked towards attaining our goals. Positivity, motivation, and inspira- tion can come and go quickly. They are fleeting. The important thing is to stay disciplined in our process as we work to- wards our goals. We each have the re- sponsibility to recognize what will work to help us flip our own switch, to turn ourselves onto positivity, motiva- tion, inspiration, and discipline. I needed to keep reminders in front of me all the time. Each day my signs worked as a coach. My “coach” provided me constant, visual cues of where my focus, intention and energy needed to be, so I could bring my best each day. What will your “coach” be? “When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe then you’ll be successful.” — ERIC THOMAS, MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKER AND AUTHOR

278 DONENE TAYLOR Open Your Mind In my many practice sessions with Lari Dee, she often told me to pay attention to “feel.” She would ask me while I was roping, “What are you feeling? What does your rope feel like? What does your swing or delivery feel like? What does your horse feel like?” At times, she even told me to close my eyes while I roped the dummy. For a long time, I didn’t really get it. I wanted to focus on what my swing looked like catching the dummy instead of what it felt like. I didn’t open my mind enough to understand it. I only wanted to focus on the mechanics. “I’m just a mechanics type of person, that’s just how I learn,” I would say. Lari Dee, Hope and I had watched the same movie, Seven days in Utopia. I had a special sign made for my barn with our favorite line from that movie, See it, Feel it, Trust it. I knew this concept was im- portant, but I didn’t fully get it. One evening, after a full day of lessons followed by dinner at Lari Dee’s home, Lari Dee said to me, “Let’s go back out to the barn and rope the dummy one more time.” I eagerly agreed. As we roped the dummy, Lari Dee said, “Stop looking at the rope and focus on the feel of it.” She could see that I was struggling to shift my focus to the feel of the rope. So, she walked over to the light switch panel and killed the lights. The barn went black. “Keep roping,” she told me. “I don’t think I can catch it in the dark, Lari Dee.” “I don’t care if you catch it,” she replied. “We aren’t trying to catch it. I want you to feel your rope. I want you to feel how the rope feels in your hand, what it feels like as you are swinging it, feel where the tip of your rope is, feel your delivery.” I was frustrated. I wasn’t catching the dummy and it bothered me. I didn’t like doing something different. I was annoyed that I couldn’t see anything. However, I trusted Lari Dee.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 279 After a few minutes, I realized she was not going to turn the lights back on. I had to go with it. I decided to do as she said and focus on the feel of the rope. As I worked the drill, I began to connect the dots of what she had been coaching me to do over the last few years. The next day, as we roped calves, things felt different. I began to understand what it actually meant to feel all the roping components. On my way home, I decided to do more “roping for feel” practice in the dark or with my eyes closed. The very next night, right before I went to bed, I turned off my barn lights and roped my dummy with all my focus on feel. I focused on how the rope felt in my hand, what the rope felt like when I was swinging it, what the crowns of the rope felt like on each of my fingers, what the rope felt like as I delivered it to the calf’s neck, what the coils felt like in my left hand, what my left hand felt like when it followed my right hand with my delivery, what my rope felt like in, as Lari Dee called, the 1, 2, 3, and 4 positions. Funny enough, roping in the dark was a bit of a lightbulb moment. That simple exercise made such a difference, helping me tune into the feel of things. This became a part of my routine—in my last dummy roping practice before bed, I’d turn off the barn lights and rope for feel. As I practiced, I became totally in tune with the feel. Finally, I was getting to a place where I could actually transfer that experience to rop- ing live cattle. I was getting to a place where I could actually be in con- trol of myself. I could see everything slow down. My senses heightened. It was like I could see everything transpire more slowly, even when— especially when—roping live cattle. Along with roping in the dark, I stayed faithful to my meditation practice. Sometimes I would mediate multiple times during the day. Meditating, along with the other purposeful and deliberate practice I was doing, seemed to slow down time. It was as though what was hap- pening around me moved at a slower pace, and I could process what was happening in the arena quicker. In my mind, it seemed that I had

280 DONENE TAYLOR more time to react to a situation. It was like a superpower, allowing me to make the split-second decisions I needed to make while roping calves. All my senses heightened. I was completely in the moment.

HEART OF A CHAMPION 281 DIGGING DEEPER – DO THE WORK ARE YOUR PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS STOPPING YOU FROM TRYING SOMETHING NEW? At first, roping by ‘feel’ seemed awkward to me. As did meditation. In order to get the benefits, they of- fered, I needed to open my mind. When our mind is closed to new ways of thinking we can keep ourselves stuck in our old ways. When we are open to new ways of thinking we give ourselves the opportunity to move forward. “You must learn a new way to think before you can master a new way to be.” — MARIANNE WILLIAMSON, AUTHOR AND ACTIVIST

282 DONENE TAYLOR Train It, Then Trust It During one coaching session with Brian, I told him something I’d ob- served about myself. “Sometimes on the day of the competition, how I feel physically or mentally determines how I perform,” I said. “Some days I do not feel 100% or have my “A” game. I would have been better off just to stay home or turn around and go back home because I was already defeated before I even competed.” Brian asked me frankly, “Are you that bad that you must feel 100% or have your “A” game in order to perform well?” “I never thought of it that way,” I said. “I just know there is a dis- connect between the preparation I bring with me and the performance I deliver when I don’t have 100% of what I got.” For comparison, I told Brian about a day where I had seen Lari Dee compete when she was very ill—and she still won. “I wish I could do more of that,” I said. Brian told me, “10% of the time you will have great stuff, 10% of the time you will have nothing, and 80% of the time you will have av- erage stuff. Whether or not you have a good season is how mentally tough you are during that 80%.” Brian poured even more tough love into me. “When you don’t have 100%, you can still perform well by giving 100% of what you do have,” he explained. “If you have 80% then give 100% of that 80%. If you 70% that day, then give 100% of your 70%.” “Wow,” I said. “This changes my entire perspective.” I knew I had begun tapping into that mindset when it came to how I was performing with my current medical condition. But Brian had made it even clearer for me. After that talk, I was fired up! Absolutely no excuses from here on out! Even though some days I may not feel 100% or have my “A” game it does not matter as long as I give 100% of what I got; that will be enough to perform my best. I’d thought with enough time and hard work I’d achieve my goal.