Morphed into Sonnet Form Preview

RIGHT PERSPECTIVE Yes, my prospects may appear bleak. But, that’s just to the constitutionally weak. There’s not one walking technique I haven’t tried. No matter the result, I take it in stride. If any of y’all doubt me, … I just turn the other cheek. 341

SUCCESS POSSIBLE?! Post-accident, I have way different goals. My original life plan now has several holes. Thus, I’m back to the ol’ metaphorical drawing board. There are still many objectives I’m striving toward. Who said I could do it?! … I’ll check the polls. 342

LIKE YOUR WORK Despite my current life’s being hellaciously bad, I work to improve it … just a tad. Outsiders must remember during my epic climb, That good work takes time. When I taste victory, … I’ll be glad. 343

STRUCTURED WORDS It’s very odd that I still know the syntax Of English, Turkish, Spanish & Japanese acts. (audible sigh) I kinda need a set format. When I speak, it’s tough to maintain my vision as flat. I always produce my effort to the max. 344

IT’S NOT BRAGGING I know I’m good. But, I will not boast. I love popular parties, of which I am host. My buddy’s happily married. … I wish I were like he. I will get over my crippling psyche. Sometimes I’ll recap my day … in a blog post. 345

SOCIAL GAMES I love cribbage, … as an example of cards. Every morning I walk about twenty yards. With friends around, I lower my psychological block. … they make me comfortable enough to audibly talk. Away go my vocal guards. 346

CONSUMPTION CONTROL I’ve always been very watchful of what I eat. But, when I actually taste my food, that’s a spectacular treat! I eat … 33 weekly meals … via my peg tube. My gastric process is more complicated than a Rubik’s cube. The fact that I’ve never cheated on my diet is very sweet! 347

MY AMBIGUOUS MIND My enigmatic brain is an intense mystery. I’ve been misunderstood for most of my history. ‘Tis only a question … Of when I will achieve walking accession. I prefer analyzing physics to attending a consistory. 348

COOKING PAST I used to be a faux iron chef. Now, it’s just not fair. Where’s the kitchen ref?! I used to just taste what I viewed. I was a creative snacks dude. Now, I’m so, so, sooo far from deaf! 349

LAUGH … LIKE NOBODY’S WATCHING6 He’s thankful he doesn’t really ever feel embarrassed. No regrets about livin’ in a community that’s terraced. When A.J. Just breathes, he sweats. Overall though, he’s got no regrets. He hopes to date thee girl who is fairest. 6 A gorgeous, modelesque former school mate’s recent random email inspired my penning this. 350

Y’ALL ARE GONNA MISS ME When I’m gooone, Y’all shan’t yawn. For, I’m certainly not a bore. Just cherish the days of yore. My awakening from my comas … was like my new dawn. 351

MIXED THOUGHTS It’s tough to truly express myself without tone. Nevertheless, any misunderstandings I must own. Without an actual voice, I feel like a mime. Muscular development requires a great deal of time. Throughout all, my heart has grown. 352

PHYSICAL NEEDS Contrary to my injury’s name, I think too much. Through all that pensive introspection, I yearn for a feminine touch. I’ve already got plenty o’ leg strength. Y’all just may not know from such a drawn-out wheelchair length. Some regard my T.B.I. As an excuse. I see it as more of a crutch. 353

NECESSARY DISTRACTIONS Since I’m always thinking, My depression is sinking. But, I hafta segregate my thoughts. Too many negative memories ties my stomach in knots. My T.B.I. Never stops stinking! 354

TELEVISION PREFERENCE Generally, I like shows to which I can relate. The Big Bang Theory shows my friends & me in my pre- accident state. ‘Scorpion’ shows how I led the smart kids too. I’ll watch ‘Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show,’ ‘Cuz … it’s something to do. I never felt, as if I had too much on my plate. 355

COMPANION PREFERENCE Since I’m searching for friends, either guys or gals will do. Foremost, though, I’d like a lady to tell, “I love you.” People who look past my hardships, & just see me as fun. Hopefully, she’ll be “the one.” … am I being too cheesy? … are you gonna spew? 356

REQUIRED MULTI-TASKING I have so much to do in so little time. It’s kind of a blessing that my attention can turn on a dime. With my limited focus, I’m like an A.D.D. Kid. I just harness my thoughts & channel my id. Writing … five books at once, … is that a crime?! 357

‘TIS BETTER TO GIVE THAN TO RECEIVE My hyperactive-amygdala affects how the title you say. I just know for an irrefutable fact that I’m not gay. Same-sex attraction is an interesting stat. Not that there’s anything wrong with that! … I just don’t swing that way. 358

SELF-EVALUATION My opinion of myself definitely varies. a There’s so much responsibility just my status carries. In terms of how I’m treated, I could go off on a rant. But, many would view my thoughts as having mathematical slant. Being a social butterfly? … ha! My T.B.I. buries. 359

TAKE A CHANCE An opportunity lost … is the opportunity not taken. I have not been permanently tackled. I’m merely shaken. As the latins decree, “seize the day!” The pros versus the cons I must weigh! I’d do anything to get my nerves to awaken! 360

UNIQUE How am I supposed to overcome this horrific bind?! I certainly get frustrated during this tiring grind. Nothing I do anymore comes with ease. I’ve gotta keep tellin’ myself: the juice is worth the squeeze. What can I say? … I’m one-of-a-kind. 361

THERAPEUTIC Instead of keeping a journal, I like to formatted write. ‘tis especially calming, after I suffer a slight. I’m so left-brained that I’ve just gotta have order! I hafta maximize my strength to locate my muscular border. I’ll never surrender! But, it’s been one helluva fight! 362

GIVE YOUR 110% … ALWAYS For effort, I don’t just strive for the a. I go all out. Never wander astray. My T.B.I. caused a severely blatant neural splice. I need repetition. So, accuracy’s great. But, I prefer being precise. I maintain my opinions, no matter what critics say. 363

DIET?! For some reason, for over 12 years, my weight has barely changed. A balanced set of nutritious vitamins I have arranged. “I want to live deep, And “suck out all the marrow of life.”7 … seems steep. Thanks to this tubing, I was close to deranged. 7 Henry David Thoreau 364

GOTTA KEEP BUSY Thank goodness I’m so easily amused. If I had a laptop bill, I’d feel I abused. It’s really tough to unwind, When I’m so alone in my mind. If I explained all my mathematical thoughts, you’d be confused. 365

HOBBIES PREFERENCE After my accident, I’ve had to alter my life choices. Since I can’t talk, I hear way too many inner voices. I want to mainly hear the laughs of my wife & my kids. I will climb over these tragic downward skids. Then, others will marvel, “Wow, how A.J. rejoices!” 366

ALTERNATIVE COMMUNICATIONS Since I’ve forgotten most of my Spanish & Turkish, I’ve only considered maybe learning yerkish.8 But, I do have a DynaVox That acts as my computerized voice box. But, that hides how my personality is rather quirkish. 8 An artificial language of hand signs, other physical tokens, and lexigrams 367

I LOVE SNATCH! I mean the Guy Ritchie film, not the slang term for ‘vagina’! Thankfully, I have no family history of angina. The movie’s got great names … like Boris the Blade. The best, though, is Turkish. He doesn’t fade. Apparently, my bones are brittle like china. 368

IF I DON’T TRY, THEN I DON’T KNOW Not everything’s so black n’ white. A “failure” could still be considered a win. In the long-run, the gained experience would save it from the trash bin. Backwards it may seem. But, I learn more from a loss. Unintentionally, my accident taught me to be a better boss. To properly learn, I’ve gotta go take one on the chin. 369

CINEMATIC INSPIRATION I like the movie, Rounders, ‘cuz I can count cards. The Green Mile shows that we can’t trust all guards. I see my numerical oddity in A Beautiful Mind. Gulliver’s Travels shows a misunderstood find. Iron Man shows success despite metal shards. 370

WAS I SPOILED?! My ex-fiancee used to live with me. We shared a bed. Now, I just can’t get out how she fucked with my head. Oh, we had plenty o’ sex. Just now, … Me, Myself & I, … we ain’t playin’ with full decks. Am I that laudable … for the journey I’ve led?! 371

ONLY HAPPY THOUGHTS I’ve got so many concepts overflowing from my brain. I try really hard to not think of my bane. For every … dozen strengths, I do have one weakness. I keep a positive home … to avert any bleakness. Overall though, I am … mysteriously sane. 372

MAD RESPECT FOR OTHERS’ WORK I like to observe a peer in his [respective] zone. Hey, maybe I can develop a skill from stuff he’s shown. Personally, all my traits are kinda enmeshing. Learning new crafts can be quite refreshing. Above all, I remember: to each, his own. 373

ASSORTED FAMILIAL-JOBS I have the utmost admiration for my uncle, who’s a comic. I don’t think anyone on my paternal side did anything Islamic. … I really love to tell jokes. Especially if I have an audience of lotsa folks. My aunt works at a great university. But, I’m kinda anomic. 374

GOTTA FIND YOUR NICHE Personally, I have many a zone of danger. … o’ course, I mean that metaphorically, … unless there’s a stranger. Math whizzes, we can’t outnumber. I’d love to discuss digits … o’er a slumber. Despite all, I’d never go to an exchanger. 375

I’VE BECOME MORE BALANCED Before my accident, I had zero shareholders. Now, I do many different things. So, I need business card holders. … ladies have described me as “quite gallant.” Affectionate female treatment is yet another talent. I had a chip on both shoulders. 376

I TYPE WHAT I SEE I have several influences, especially from comedy. … What can I say? … I’m an anomaly. ‘tis not plagiarism. I don’t just copy. I take pride in my work. I shan’t get sloppy. When I watch Whose Line … ?’, is it ‘quantity or quality?’ 377

I HOPE IT’S NOT TRUE! It’s common to say, “if you don’t use it, you lose it.” Did my accident forever prevent me from gaining new wit? … could my penis … fall off?! To me, my jerk friends did wall off. I worry about it so much, I’m afraid I’ll grow a big zit. 378

WHO ME?! Unfortunately, my peg tube prevents a wrestling continuance. … it also stops my hand-eye confluence. In all activities, I give myself … regards highest. However, I may be … just a tad … biased. Thus, I hold a noticeable influence. 379

BRAG NOT When I cling to my storied past, it may seeeeem like a boast. Pre-accident, I was undoubtedly smarter than most. I know that actions speak louder than words. I’m still a leader of nerds. Livin’ with a T.B.I. Is like an everyday roast. 380

WHAT YOU SEE IS [NOT] WHAT YOU GET I am [way] more than meets the eye[s]. When y’all underestimate me, I just sigh. People see my using my letterboard, & they call me a “retard”. As a result, only my pride is scarred. I am just amazing. … I do not know why. 381

SOURCES OF MY AMUSEMENT The statement that “[I’m] creepy & retarded” is an unknowing rumor. To me, in that ignorance, I find humor. The strangest things will cause me to laugh. I’ll inadvertently incite an awkward party gaffe. It’s okay to joke, … ‘cuz I do not have a tumor! 382

CAN MONEY BRING HAPPINESS? To the titular question, to me, it seems just the opposite. It seems all work separately. There’s no neural conglomerate. My newly-gained fortune justifies my hustles. But, it sucks I can’t speed up nerve growth … only muscles. Of my still functioning neural cells, math ones are predominant. 383

IGNORANCE IS [NOT] BLISS Suffering through two separate comas is indescribably tough. Trying to convince peers I wasn’t around is rough. Think I’m lyin’? … go ahead: hit me. I ain’t no cream puff. I will tell you, when you’ve had enough. … in the meantime, I wanna learn a lot more stuff. 384

YOU’VE ALL GOTTA LEARN It’s disheartening (audible sigh) that I hafta teach Y’all that I still have thoughts … just not speech. Employing trial & error, my hopes never lessen. I should give a perseverance lesson. … to [only?!] Me, my goals are within reach. 385

MIND >> MUSCLES In school, I was recognized as a “scholar-athlete”. I always thought that was pretty neat. O’ course, now, it’s easy to see which I prefer. I will walk again! … why won’t someone concur?! Mark me down … on the enigma sheet. 386

WHY SO, SO, SOOO POLITICALLY CORRECT?! Is it so frowned upon to be slightly politically wrong?! … even if it’s done in song?! Regarding my writing, I’ve got a long list o’ plans. For my conglomeration of work, I have … umpteen fans. I yearn to … find … where I … belong! 387

RESULTS >> PROCESS Although I cannot yet run, I relentlessly work on my ability to stun. Thankfully, my brilliant attorney … set me up nicely for an epic journey. Despite many mistrials, I make sure to have fun! 388

AIRPLANE TRAVEL I used to have no problems with air flight. … now, I feel an imaginary slight. I guess the main hurdle I now face … is spending much continued time in a confined space. Only if I could get Wi-Fi, … I’d constantly write. 389

AESTHETIC APPEAL Men are built … like a commonplace wrench. They’ll get you out of an awkward trench. Women, however, are designed … like a picturesque painting. A true work of art will cause some fainting. Without a good opening line, you’ll be ridin’ the bench. 390