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Chapter 16rang him to talk it over, he said that it was hardly snowing athis end and he thought I would be ok to come down. I couldcomplete the paperwork the day I came down, stay atHintlesham Hall for the night and be away the next day. Iwasn’t convinced, but I went along with what he basicallywanted. There was no need for Bruce to come as it was simplybringing two members into the scheme and Paul Thompsonwouldn’t be there anyway, to discuss anything else. Me andBruce had been down to BT&D a number of times in the lastmonth or so, bringing members into the scheme. Also we haddinner with Paul on one occasion at the Hintlesham. We allseemed to get on very well and got to know one another thatbit more. Fortunately, this was the week that my mum was stayingwith us, so she could look after our cat, Jenny. Me and Ann putour suitcases into the boot of my new black 735 SE BMW andset off. I didn’t need a secretary for just two members and if Ihad, Ann was more than capable. When we started the journey,it wasn’t actually snowing, there was just a few light flakes inthe air. What worried me was when we started out there hadbeen some blue sky but as we drove along the M11 the entiresky became thick with low level grey clouds. I realised I hadmade a mistake and should not have made the journey but itwas too late to turn back. We arrived at Hintlesham Hall at about one in the afternoonand was taken to our suite. The Braganza Suite. Occupying anentire wing on the first floor adjacent to the stunning LongGallery, the Braganza Suite has a separate large lounge areawith 17th century plasterwork ceiling, dressing room andspacious bedroom overlooking the lawns at the front of thehouse. The luxury bathroom has twin showers, freestanding 245

Chapter 16claw-foot bath and wall television. Unpacked and then wentstraight over to BT&D, spoke to the new employees concernedand completed the paperwork to bring them into the pensionscheme. Back to Hintlesham in time for one of their wonderfulgourmet dinners. Next morning the phone rang in our suite, itwas the manager of the hotel, “I’m very sorry sir to have toinform you that all roads leading from the Hotel are notpassable or drivable. If you would be so kind as to meet me inthe lounge, we can discuss what can be done.” Not a lot as faras returning home was concerned. Apparently all other guestshad left the previous night, so me and Ann were the only guestsin the hotel. We went on to stay for another three nights andeverything was on the house. When we went to any hotel tostay, we always brought with us a Sony CD player and twospeakers. So we had music, we had champagne and all thebooze and good food we wanted. All in the Braganza Suite. Wehad the time of our lives, wonderful food, good music andsex,sex,sex and then into the twin showers and then more sex.Well, there was nothing else to do!!! After three days, the roads were finally open for traffic, butstill very dangerous. Me and Ann decided to make a move. Iwill always remember looking out of our suite window on themorning we were due to leave and seeing two employees of thehotel washing my BMW, now that’s what you call service. Imust just say that at this time, when we were visitingHintlesham Hall quite frequently, a better hotel you would behard to find. It truly was a wonderful place to stay. Dating backto the 1400s, Hintlesham Hall is an impressive building withtraditional decor, which is steeped in history. A magnificentgrade one listed building nestled in the tranquil Suffolkcountryside. A little spot of luxury in beautiful surroundings, 246

Chapter 16only an hour away from Stansted airport and a short drive fromIpswich town centre. We were on our way back home. The roads from the hotelwere dangerous, you had to really concentrate, feeling iceunder the wheels, nearly all the time. Eventually we got ontothe M11. It was just a dirt track, about four feet wide. If youveered of the track like some cars did you sunk into the snowwhich was hardening into ice as the day wore on. Now our timehad come, where we had to go off the M11 onto a side road thatled to the M25, which would take us to Reigate and then downon the A217 to Kingswood where we lived. No way, after oneminute on this side road the car just stuck in the snow andwouldn’t budge. The wheels just went round and round. Ihadn’t brought a shovel with me, I was fucked. We weren’t theonly ones that were stuck, the turn off to the M25 was a busyone. It was like the second world war: there were cars, lorries,there must have been a hundred all bogged down, it was anightmare; there was spotlights and flashing lightseverywhere. Very scary. Me and Ann was thinking aboutleaving the car and trying to make it on foot somewhere,leaving my new 735 BMW car, I felt like crying. I was out of thecar in my wellington boots contemplating what few optionswere open to us, when suddenly out of the blue, or should I sayout of the white, Superman appeared. Six foot four, built likeArnold whatshisname and with a great big, fucking shovel.“Do you want me to dig you out mate,” he said. Within tenminutes we were on the M25. Past the worst but still verydodgy. We slowly but surely arrived back at our house,Wraymead. The snow lay on the driveway, more than a foot high. Theweather forecast was for more snow on the way and I thoughtmy car had, had its fair share of snow on the bonnet; so with 247

Chapter 16wellies on of course, I fetched the shovel out of the garage. Toldme mum we had arrived back and started shovelling the snowof the driveway. After half an hour, I had made a sufficientclearing of snow to drive the car into the garage. Mum and thecat were both very pleased to see us and we were bloominpleased to see them. The good times were just beginning andAnn and myself were going to make the most of it. The intakeof this new business, together with my increasing regularbusiness meant I immediately became a member of AbbeyLife’s Chairman’s club which opens up an entirely new world:it’s the equivalent of becoming a movie star overnight andeverything that would go with that. Our accountant advisedAnn to stop working and become a partnership with me. Iemployed a PA, took on two sales men and we were on ourway. When I started in the life assurance business as a financialadviser, most of my friends said that I must be crazy and whyon earth was I going to sell life assurance and how naff it was.I didn’t think like that at all. I had a mortgage and life covermyself and felt it was very important, but life assurance hadthis widely held opinion by the British public. “The lifeassurance salesman.” I was one of fifty sales men to go on aninduction course with Abbey and then we went into the fieldwith our managers and slowly started to see clients by our self.The motto was, you had to survive to succeed. After two years,I was the only one to survive. The other forty-nine failed. Theyhad all left the business. That’s how hard it was at thebeginning. So, when I started to earn good money, I knew howmuch I deserved it.We bought a detached house in Kingswood, Surrey. Filled it up with antiques. Two BMWs in the driveway. The 248

Chapter 16Same gardener, Sid, (a highly intelligent man,) for 27 years. Weweren’t just on our way, we were there. Over the next 30 yearswe went on 150 flights to every exotic place in the world. Wehad a villa and an apartment in Tenerife and often stayed at theRoyal hotel in San Remo, Italy. In the Royal suite, of course. At Tenerife we owned a three bedroom Villa on Golf delSur. Looking over the second fairway, with the MediterraneanSea directly behind that fairway. The original project of 27 holes was made by the famousdesigner Pepe Gancedo. But Manuel Piñero was the person incharge turning the Golf del Sur into the only golf course on theCanary Islands with 3 courses after renewing the enlargementof the Links course in 2005. The 27 holes are perfectly dividedon the three courses: The North course with 2949 metres and 9holes splitted in 2 holes with par 3, 5 with par 4 and 2 with par5. At the South course there are 2 holes with par 3, 5 with par 4and 2 with par 5, covering an extension superior of 2957 metros.The 36 shots recently opened at the Links course are divided in2 holes with par 3, 5 with par 4 and 2 holes par 5 with a playingarea of 2853 metres. The morphology of the soil has a remarkable influence onthe features of each round. The presence of the sea and theimpressive ravines on the course, giving the player theopportunity to enjoy each visit made to Golf del Sur. Thefairways, wide and undulating, are dotted with many naturalobstacles. The presence of various water hazards is in clearcontrast with the incredible volcanic sand bunkers protectingthe greens. Golf del Sur facilities are at the same level of the greatestEuropean golf resorts. The Club House, in traditional style canhost events of any kind, with a wonderful catering service fromits restaurant. The Pro Shop offers a wide range of first line 249

Chapter 16products. By creating the academy, Golf del Sur clearly aims onthe promotion of this sport on the Island. With a driving range,2 putting and chipping greens and a practise range, it's acomplete area for learning. In 1989, 1992, 1993 and 1994, Golfdel Sur hosted the Tenerife Open tournament. Twenty minutes down the road, in Playa de las Americaswe owned a top floor two bedroom apartment in a three storeyblock. Playa de las Americas Veronica's strip, is that part oftown, famous for its clubbing, bars and night life. Veronicasreally comes alive at night: there are clubs on one side of theroad and bars on the other. There is a huge range to choosefrom. In the evening we would start off at the Waikiki: the bestcocktail bar on the strip. In fact, it’s just at the beginning of thestrip. The male barmen were all dressed in grass skirts andmade the best cocktails I’d ever tasted, except for the cocktailbar in Clapham Junction, more about that later. The music atthe Waikiki was brilliant: the latest sounds, loud but qualityspeakers. Then we would walk down to a nearby restaurant.Normally we would have something like, simple grilled fish,fresh nicely presented salad and canarian wrinkly potatoeswith a bottle of white wine. After that, a few minutes along thestrip, we would go to a night club. Now I can’t remember thename, but it was a fantastic club. The sort of club, like manyclubs, that was too good to last forever. The guys on the doorwere very careful who they allowed in and there was never anytrouble when Ann and myself was there. The club wasdecorated very expensively. The rows of comfortablearmchairs and tables were set on different levels that went up.So you had a row of say, thirty armchairs and tables, thenbehind that, it went up to another level with thirty armchairsand tables and so on. When the waiters came to serve you, they 250

Chapter 16would put a reserve tag on the table, so it was your table for therest of the night. The music was great and we always enjoyedourselves there. You must remember, me and Ann went to Tenerife, threetimes a year, every year for the twelve years that we had theproperties. And we went to these places every night during ourstay. Which meant the people at these places got to know usquite well and new we spent a lot of money with them. We would come out of the night club at about three a.m.and then go on to one of the many bars with dance floors,where we would drink and dance our way to oblivion. Wewould stagger out of wherever we were and walk for about fiveminutes to our apartment. The last thing you wanted to dothen, was to get into a car; only, if you wanted to dieimmediately. Arrive back at our apartment, who knows,around five a.m. In the apartment we had two settees, basicallywooden frame and mattress with a foam back. We particularlybought these because, with one movement, you could put thefoam back to the side as a pillow and you were a kip. Becausemost of the time the weather was warm, even in the earlyhours, you didn’t even need a sheet let alone a blanket. Everything was geared to our pure enjoyment and comfort.And who wants to be a life insurance salesman, a? Theapartment was set in a lovely complex. Apartments went downto the sea in two rows. In-between the rows of apartments wereswimming pools, one after the other with only little water fallsseparating them. We would have brunch at the apartment and then set off forour Villa on the Golf Del Sur. The Villa was a real home fromhome. We had taken a lot of time choosing the right type ofSpanish furniture and curtains and accessories. TV and stereo.There were green lawns at the front and back, where you could 251

Chapter 16sun bath or relax. It was a nice place to be and we were veryhappy there. The club house was a magnificently impressivebuilding, with a big surrounding terrace that looked on tobeautiful scenic views over the fairways and sea. Inside, thedecoration was typical Spanish at its most flamboyant. Theupstairs housed a very attractive bar and cocktail area, with abig grand winding staircase sweeping down to the restaurantbelow. We enjoyed some wonderful Christmases and New yeareve´s there. The food and service was first class. And of coursewhen you came home late at night it was always pleasantlywarm. We had become involved with Tenerife through BruceGrindley, my manager at Abbey. He had holidayed there withhis wife, Margaret and they really enjoyed it. While they werethere, they had met another couple who lived there, Derek andLouise. Derek who had run his own building business back inthe UK, was apparently stitched up by one of his partners inthe business. He had already made a lot of money by this timeand was so fed up by all this that he went home one day andsaid to his wife, “That’s it, let’s sell up and retire to Tenerife.”Obviously, she was surprised as they were only in their mid-forties. After Derek and Louise had been there for couple of years,Louise become bored and worked part time for an estate agent.With all the new property that was being built there at the time,Louise soon became aware of the money that could be earnedfrom this kind of business. So when the opportunity topurchase an estate agency came up, she was interested, anddiscussed it with her husband. He wasn’t interested, he had hisdogs, two beautiful Alsatian dogs and he loved the weatherand deep sea diving. He suggested to Louise, that she shouldbuy the estate agency and run it herself. They certainly had 252

Chapter 16sufficient capital to take on a venture of this kind. Louisebecame an estate agent and went on to create a successfulbusiness. Now she wanted to expand and asked Bruce if he wantedto invest and become a working partner. At first of course,Bruce was more than sceptical. He had been with Abbey Lifefrom the age of eighteen, at their Head Office in Bournemouth.´Sorting out customer problems department.` Then finallybecoming an associate. I think the problem was, when hebecame a manager he had to think in a totally different way.It’s like running your own business but not being in charge:Abbey Life was. The pressure on a manager was severe, alwaysin a time frame to recruit and lead by example. After a while,Bruce accomplished this comfortably and then started to feelunsatisfied because with this, goes control and he didn’t haveany, Abbey did. There were other factors as well, which I willmention a bit later. Bruce and Margaret talked it over, in Tenerife, on the planeback to the UK and all the time at home. The more theydiscussed it, the more confident they became that they couldmake a success of selling property in Spain. Quite frankly, ifany one could succeed, it was Bruce and there was atremendous amount of property being built in Tenerife at thattime. The commissions on selling new property wereoutrageously high. At the end of the day Bruce Knew he had totake a chance on such a golden opportunity. Technology andcomputers were just coming into their own: Bruce being amanager with Abbey Life had to be totally au fait with the latesttechnology in computers and websites and he was. Back thenin the eighties, this type of technology was very new, so withthis knowledge, he had a good advantage over his competitors. 253

Chapter 16 Only a year or so before, they had bought a very impressivehouse, a grade two listed property in an acre of ground, whichalso included a Tithe barn. They had spent all of that yearrenovating both buildings. Well, as much as they were allowedto with listed buildings. Now they were going to sell it all andwith their two children whose ages were twelve and fourteen,move lock, stock and barrel to Tenerife. A few weeks before they left for Tenerife, they held a goingaway party for all of Bruce’s associates, friends and existingclients, which took place in their Tithe barn. It was a wonderfulevening for me and Ann and everyone there had a good time.Also an emotional one, an end to the Bruce Grindley era in theUK. To a degree, it was also disastrous for me: me and Brucewere just getting to Know Paul and the employees of BT&Dtechnologies, the big company pension scheme they we had setup; Bruce had been paramount in obtaining the scheme in thefirst place and now he wasn’t here, made things more thandifficult. We had already discussed the fact that as time wentby, many of Abbey Life’s competitors would try and take thescheme away from us. Me and Bruce agreed that I would keeppaying him fifty percent of the commission of the scheme forthe foreseeable future. He was still able to oversee the schemefrom a distance and technology was making that easier. I ofcourse, not only received fifty percent of the commission butalso one hundred percent of all the points that qualified forconventions and other prizes. Also the professional and personal guidance on a dailybasis, from a person of Bruce’s ability, was a massive loss. Butlife goes on. After about three years, Hambros brokerspersuaded Paul, that their scheme was more beneficial to theiremployees and it was taken off me and Abbey. The scheme, toa degree, had served its purpose, for me. I had earned a lot of 254

Chapter 16money from it, survived a few more years to be able to buildmy client bank and had been introduced to Chairman’s Cubqualifications. All these were vital to the growth of my businessand in a way, I was relieved to have got rid of the scheme. Mostof the people at BTD Technologies were a bumptious lot. Work was always a means to an end to me. I didn’t live forwork, I lived for the life that it gave me. I liked the idea of neverhaving one particular client that you depended on. I had builtup a very big client bank and knew that if one client let medown, then it didn’t really matter in the overall scheme ofthings. I always had lots of clients who were genuinely happyto see me and appreciated all that I had done for them and I feltthe same way about them. A year before, when the BTD scheme was going strong, mysecretary at that time decided to leave. She was originally an airhostess and had decided to go back into that profession. So PaulHerbert, my manager now, since Bruce had departed toTenerife, was left with the job to find me a new secretary. Paulwas in his early thirties, married with two children. Very withit and on the ball. He advertised in the local papers and contacted variousemployment agencies. I went on holiday and when I returned,he told me that he had interviewed several ladies but didn’tthink any of them was suitable. He said, “There was one girlwho was twenty one years of age, who could have been suitablebut after I explained the responsibility of the position, shethought she would not be able to handle it.” He then said, “Shewas a pretty little thing, had beautiful brown eyes.” Shouldn’thave said that Paul. 255

Chapter 16Amanda Evans, was her name and I told Paul to ring her back and arrange another appointment. Just tell her, thatI would like to meet her. Paul was a very sharp character andquickly arranged the appointment. She was only five feet tall, perfect figure. Her face was sobeautiful, it was hard to take in all at once, let alone describe.Thick black short cut hair, back combed and swept back. Backand sides razor cut short. Very, very stylish with a hint of punkrock. Her eyes were almond brown, her nose small and lovelyand her lips wanted you to get your cock out immediately andput it in her mouth. Perfect full mouth-watering lips. She wasconfident but not overly. She was edgy, but in control, she wasin control of me. I was gone. The interview went well. I told her that Paul had overdonethe intricacies of the position and having talked to her, I knewshe would be right for the job. She had to give her currentemployer two weeks’ notice, so she would commence with usafter that, the following Monday Amanda soon settled in and everything was up andrunning. She talked to clients professionally and dealt withqueries efficiently. I took her for a drink, several times afterwork, but didn’t receive good vibes from her: she simply actedlike she didn’t want to be there; so I stopped asking her anddecided she had her own agenda, that didn’t include me. Sheknew her boss was married and didn’t want to get involvedwith a married man and I don’t blame her. Fair enough, youcan’t win them all. Also I was thirty nine to her twenty one, very much marriedand with the high amount of business I was producing, didn’tneed any more stress than I already had. To have her just tolook at was pleasing in itself. Then it was time to go down toIpswich again. I would drive there, with Ann and Amanda as 256

Chapter 16passengers. I booked two suites exactly the same. One for Meand Ann and the other for Amanda. For this trip I decided notto go to the Hintlesham Hall but another hotel. I can’tremember the name of the hotel now but it was more modernand more convenient to the BD&D offices. It was still a top classhotel and the two suites we had were the best suites in the hotel.We had booked for three nights. It was going to be busy andstressful. I had to give a speech on stage, to about one hundredand fifty employees on the benefits of a company pensionscheme and all the tax advantages to them as employees. Thenfor the next few days, seeing about thirty new employees toBT&D and bringing them into the scheme. Remember, a lot ofthe BT&D employees were professors and highly educated andtechnical people who wanted to know everything about thescheme and asked very intricate questions. The journey to Ipswich took two and half hours. A sunnywarm day in September. As we arrived at the hotel the sun hadset and the temperature had fallen considerably, a chill windwas in the air. We booked in and then went to our suites. Thesuite was very nice and spacious, in particularly the bedroom,which had an enormous King-size bed. Amanda’s suite wasexactly the same as ours. I was unpacking my case when thephone rang, I answered and Amanda’s voice said, “I’m lonely,I have this great big bed and there’s only little me.” Initially, Ithought all my dreams had come true at once, but she carriedon, “can I invite my boyfriend over.” I rather sillerly, said yes,but was very soon pissed off. We had our evening meal together, me, Ann and Amanda.Shortly after the boyfriend arrived: he must have completed atwo and half hour journey in twenty minutes and so would Ihave, if it meant fucking Amanda all night. The next two nightswe never saw her. When she got into the car in the morning, for 257

Chapter 16us to go to the BT&D offices, I could still see he’s cock in hermouth. She had these beautiful full lips with an extra coatingof red lipstick. She looked sluttish, but absolutely gorgeous. Tosay I was jealous was the understatement of the year. We arrived back home on the Thursday, about three in theafternoon. Amanda had decided to come back later, in herboyfriend’s car. On the Friday she didn’t turn up for work.Besides everything else, it was totally unprofessional. I had allthese applications and a lot of paperwork to be completed plusthe compliance and regulations to get through and she hadtreated the whole exercise as a sexual holiday. Veryunprofessional and degrading. She had to go. I brought PaulHerbert up to date with everything and he agreed. Monday morning, she arrived looking a bit nervous. I calledher into my office and explained that her behaviour in Ipswichwas unacceptable and she had left me no alternative other thanto terminate her employment; I would give her two weeks’notice. I went on to say that up to then she had been doingreally well, but she had only herself to blame. She said, “Ihaven’t done anything wrong, I asked your permission first,when I phoned you and after that, if you had said no toanything, then I wouldn’t have done it. Friday I wasn’t well, Iwas sick and had pains in my stomach.” I thought, yeh toomuch cock. I said, “C’mon Amanda, you shouldn’t have even suggested thathe came over. You knew how important this meeting was. Itwas a ridicules thing to do and if you’re not prepared to admitthat, there’s no more to be said.” “Ok your right, I shouldn’t have.” Then she totally changed the subject by saying, “You used to take me for a drink once and now you don’tanymore.” 258

Chapter 16 “You always looked like you didn’t want to be there, so Istopped,” She sat there and didn’t say anything. She looked flushedand a little upset, God she was beautiful. I said, “Will you join me for a drink this evening?” “Ok, yes, that would be nice.” I thought, it’s up to her now, if she stays or goes. Whatever,I was going to enjoy this evening come what may. We went to the Copthorne Hotel, which was a short drivefrom the offices. Nice hotel: four star and it had a good bar todrink in, crowded but with lots of nooks and crannies, so youcould be at a table which was away from the crowd and not benoticed. We sat down with our drinks, large glass of white winefor Amanda and a Budweiser for me. We had a few moredrinks and a heated conversation. We were both a little pissedby now and the time had come to play my cards, so I said, “Why did you embarrass me in front of my wife andcolleagues, when you know that I fancy you like crazy.” “I don’t know, I didn’t know you felt like that about me.” “Well, you do now, so what are we going to do about it.” “What do you want to do about it?” And her eyes lockedinto mine. I said “I’m going to book a room in this hotel, take you there andfuck you senseless.” “Ok.” We were both naked in bed, I was down at her pussy, shewas moaning with pleasure, “Roy oh Roy, oh my God, I’m soturned on, fucking hell,” My penis felt enormous, it was so hardit was hurting. I stuck it in her mouth for some love andattention. I was kneeling over her looking at the red lipstickslightly smearing my cock. This beautiful mouth and my cock 259

Chapter 16making love to one another. God, she was good. I then took mycock out of her mouth and replaced it with my tongue. I said, “Shall I fuck you now.” “Please God.” It really was the fuck of the century. When our orgasmswere receding, Amanda said to me, ”Roy can you leave your penis inside me for a while, it feelsso nice and warm.” After a few minutes, she said, “Oh, you naughty boy, it’s getting hard again.” She was a fantastic girl. Once I got to know her moreintimately, I found out what a terrific person she really was.Anyway, the same old story, I had to get home to my wife Ann.The time was ten pm. Amanda was asleep, totally wacked out:while we had been making love, we had also been drinkingwhite wine. I wrote her a note. ´You are a wonderful personand I genuinely love you very much. Could you also thankyour pussy for me. Have the morning off, see you in theafternoon. If I find that when you awoke tonight, you invitedyour boyfriend over, I will kill you.` As I drove home I remember listening to the Cardigans´Junk of heart` playing on the car cd player and thinking; wasit right for a man to enjoy life as much as I did. Remember, a lot of my business was done in the evening,seeing clients at their homes. So I didn’t have to think of anexcuse for being home late. What I did have to do was earn atleast five thousand pounds a month. A lot of money, thirtyyears ago. Otherwise Ann would bring to my attention that weweren’t transferring enough money from the business accountto the personal account. The next day, Amanda arrived in the office at two pm. Whata difference a day makes, or should I say a night. She couldn’t 260

Chapter 16take the smile of her face and nor could I. All we wanted to dowas fuck but we couldn’t. We had serious work to complete, toreach deadlines. Strange days, I would dictate a letter to herand then our eyes would lock and I would say, “What’s thatsmell.” She would go red and reply, “It’s my pussy juicescrying out for your cock.” I would take the notes from herhands and we would snogg violently and passionately. Thiskid was something else and I didn’t want to be anywhere else,but we both always knew that this was too close to home.Amanda was only twenty one to my forty and she had herwhole life in front of her and she was the type of girl who wasgoing to live every minute of it. Eventually we agreed that itwas best for everyone if she moved on and she soon foundanother position in Crawly town centre. I gave her the bestreference that was humanly possible without sounding like wehad, had an affair. Why did this happen to me? I had a terrific marriage and Iwas always on the edge. Michelle taught me everything: whenshe showed me how to satisfy her night after night until I wastotally familiar with all her erogenous zones literately insideout, it was like opening Aladdin’s Cave. I realised how muchcontrol I could manipulate over beautiful women I desired. Iwanted to try it out on as many girls as possible, but only theones who were special. For me to go down to their pussy I hadto basically be in love and crazy about them. Those women, Ihave put into this book. There were a lot of other women wherewhen I got to that stage, I wouldn’t go down to their pussyother than to finger and fuck. Occasionally, when the girl was not on the contraceptivepill and I had no durex with me, I would show her what amagical little box of tricks she had between her thighs and thenwe would just bring each other off. This actually was as good 261

Chapter 16as full penetration because it produced a very special feeling oflove and tenderness which created a deep respect for oneanother. Sometimes I used to make love like this in some of mylonger relationships, it’s just simply a very erotic way ofshowing your love for one another. My business was in communications which is another wordfor selling one’s self. The clothing business, Menswear. Thenthe financial business. Always meeting new people and goinginto different situations. Always having to look my best,menswear boutique, stylish. Finance, suite shirt tie of the bestmaterials. Talking the talk and as you progress up the ladder ofambition you meet a lot of girls along the way. Some of themvery beautiful and you know that with the expertise and theknowledge you have of their pussies, if you can get them intobed they will be yours for as long as you want them and I onlywanted them until another beautiful girl came along. To bed abeautiful young girl and then see her, after making love,wanting you more than anything in the world is the biggestturn on that I know so I wanted to see that again and again withall the different types of wonderful girls that I could find outthere. In fact I was so good at looking after pussy thatsometimes a girl would recommend me to her friends.Remember, this was the same for the girls. To them I was justanother stepping stone in their quest for more sexual discoveryand enjoyment. I always paid for everything and treated themwith respect and love. They all knew I was married and therewas no chance of me leaving my wife. The bottom line is, that man has always wanted to discoverand explore new territory and I’m no different; I’ve alwaysliked putting that ball in the back of the net. 262

17 Tenerife *When Bruce and Margaret had been in Tenerife for just over two years, Bruce told me that they weren’t living together anymore and were getting divorced.The marriage had been under pressure for some time, evenshowing cracks back in the UK, when Bruce you’st to describeto me, fist fights, between mother and daughter, on the stairsthat morning; as we drove off to an appointment. Apparently in Tenerife the situation had deterioratedsharply. The children had been expelled from school, whichcan happen, when children are uprooted from their naturalenvironment and more importantly Bruce had found anotherromantic interest. Someone else’s wife. The man doesn’t fuckabout, when he makes changes, he makes them. He had met the wife, who was a golf widow, obviouslywhile the husband was playing golf. There was only one thingBruce played at. Yup, you’ve guessed it. The rest of the time, hemade money. The lady in question was Mary Spencer. Anattractive, intelligent, confident person, who knew exactlywhat she wanted. Not to be a golf widow of a man who hadgiven up in his early forties but to go forward, with a man whohad the same attributes as she did: to see how much they couldachieve together in business and love. And as time as proved,they achieved a great deal in both. Bruce was like Ann, in so much as when, I had either one ofthem in my corner, even when things went wrong, they always 263

Chapter 17turned out right. Thanks Bruce. I think I still owe you somemoney. Eventually, Louise sold her fifty percent of the business toBruce who then brought Mary Spencer into the company andthe rest is history. Derek and Louise decided to pack up everything and tourthe world on motorbikes, so they bought one each. The hardestpart was for Derek to find someone, he respected and knewenough, to look after his prized Alsatian dogs. Eventually theyfinalised everything and went on a journey of a lifetime.Unfortunately, while travelling in France, they, one behind theother, attempted to overtake a long lorry. They didn’t manageto. Another lorry coming the other way hit them: they wereboth killed instantly.Christmas at the villa. On Christmas eve we decided to go to a restaurant that had been strongly recommended byseveral people. Two gay guys, who were supposedly marriedto one another, run the establishment. The decoration andatmosphere was very good and me and Ann felt comfortablethe moment we arrived. Starter, main course and desert. Allpresented in a gourmet style. Also a good selection of wines.The only criticism I had, was that one of the prawns tasted alittle bitter, but because it was small and garnished in a richsauce, I still eat it. After the restaurant, we went on to a nightclub and then arrived back at the villa at about twelve thirtyam. We opened our Christmas presents to one another andwere very pleased with them. Ann was particularly happy withthe ´Joseph, teenflow from Paris` jacket, that I had bought her,amongst many other garments of course. By this time ourequilibrium was a little over the top, from alcohol, so we 264

Chapter 17decided that Ann would wear the jacket and show it off at ourlocal watering hole just down the road from our villa. Wearrived at around one thirty am. There were two other couplesthere, one we knew. We soon got to know the other couple andeveryone wanted to dance the night away. We arrived back atour villa at four am. And crashed out on the bed. Two hourslater, I awoke feeling unwell, went into the bathroom and wasvery sick. Christmas day, I felt so bad I couldn’t get out of bed.Around three o’clock in the afternoon I arose from bed, walkedonce around the villa and went straight back to bed and stayedthere for the rest of the day. Ann was not happy; she wouldhave been even more unhappy, if she had eaten the prawn. Another time we were invited to a famous restaurant on theGolf Del Sur complex, just up the road from our favouritewatering hole. The owner was the chef, French and with anexcellent reputation for the finest food on the island. We hadbeen there once before with Bruce and Margarete andimmediately realised that the food was Micheline standard.Bruce knew him well and they had talked at some length. Thisevening was a private affair, the chefs fortieth birthday. Whenwe arrived we were surprised to see that there were only fourcouples there. A very private affair, we must have made animpression the last time we went there. We all sat at the bar having cocktails and chatting with thechef, while his staff cooked in the kitchen. Every so often hewould go into the kitchen and supervise an intricate part of thepreparation of the food. The cocktails were champagne, lacedwith brandy and topped up with a banana liquor. Theatmosphere was really good and everyone was happy. Thecocktail was incredible and I soon finished it, I was reallylooking forward to the meal. The chef poured me anothercocktail, he simply called them banana cocktails. I was sitting 265

Chapter 17at the table with Ann having coffee and said, “Ann when arewe going to have the meal?” One day, Ann and me, no it doesn’t sound right. Ann and I,that don’t sound right either. I know, its good manners to putthe other person first but it just sounds better to say, me andAnn. At least she gets a capital in her name and I don’t. Decidedthat we would drive all around the Island of Tenerife. At thetime we were there, you had a motorway going halfwayaround the island to Puerto de la Cruz in the North. Then a sortof dirt track, going around the other side on the way back toPlaya de las Americas in the south. The dirt track had mountains one side and a never endingfall from the cliff on the other side. What they call a shitty roadand what they mean by that, is every time you get to near theedge of the cliff, you shit yourself. Now we could have gone tothe north of the island by motorway and then come back thesame way by motorway to the south. But we just wanted to beable to think that we had been around the whole island. Themotorway was a motorway, easy enough. The dirt track wasmore frightening, than the ´back to the future` ride at UniversalStudios in Los Angeles, USA. We were driving a clapped outPolski Fiat 126. The car hire company had not got to know usat this stage. When I put it in second gear, you didn’t knowwhat gear, it was going to end up in. Ann was on the passengerside, which was on the cliff side, with sheer drop of thousandsof feet. Whenever the car got near the cliff side Ann wouldscream out “MIND THE DIP” We must have driven for aboutan hour and half like this. When I went to sleep that night, all Ikept hearing was “MIND THE DIP.” Puerto de la Cruz is one of the top destinations in theCanary Islands. Located in the north of Tenerife, this attractiveand bustling resort has been a firm favourite with tourists for 266

Chapter 17several decades. Today it remains as popular as ever. It isnestled in the beautiful region of the Orotava Valley, an oasisof lush green landscape and tropical fruit plantations. The Old Town is very pretty with a distinct Canariancharacter. Much of the area around the old fishing port is fullof narrow cobbled streets lined with traditional colonial-stylecafés and bars. The quaint harbour is also a lovely place to visit.In addition, there is a selection of high-end boutiques,charming plazas and a wealth of tourist attractions located allover the resort. The following memory has been made vague by time. Theywere two, either friends or brothers, I think from Germany.One was an architect, who designed the Golf Del Sur golfcourse and the other an extrovert salesman. A goodcombination and they loved one another very much, in abrotherly way. I don’t remember their names, so I will call thearchitect Franz and the salesman Anton. Franz was an introvert, a technical person who was onlyinterested in the overall creation of his dream golf course.Anton was an extrovert, a larger than life guy, fantasticcompany and a marvellous salesman in all the right ways. Sixfoot four and well built, he come over in style. Me and Ann, had many conversations with Anton and theywere always informative and funny. He loved his life inTenerife and was very happy being a bachelor. He lovedwomen and his sales position put him in touch with manylovely ladies. The last conversation we had with him, he wassaying how he had shown two American girls around one ofthe apartments. They were both in their early twenties and hehad arranged to show them around the island the next day. Hesaid they were gorgeous girls and how much he was lookingforward to seeing them again. Only, a week or two after this, 267

Chapter 17Bruce told us that Anton had been killed in a road accident.Apparently, he was driving someone back from the airport andhis car went over a cliff. Franz was devastated, he gave up allfurther interest in his project, Golf del Sol, and with Anton notaround, everything pretty much came to a halt. The course had been completed for a while. Further phasesof property had still to be built, but that wasn’t really aproblem. The problem was Anton wasn’t around anymore, tosell the properties that had already been built and there was alot of them. Some years passed before other people took overand started to get the end part of the project finished. 268

18 Christmas time *Christmas time, I always bought Ann a present. I would allow a budget of between 1,500 pounds to four thousand pounds. Remember this was twenty five tothirty years ago. With inflation that amount is much more now.I either bought her clothes or jewellery. If clothes, I wouldgenerally go to ´Josephs` in Brompton Road, London or´Channel` in Sloan Street. Both are within walking distance toone another. I would park in the National Car Park in CadoganPlace, which was just off Sloan Street. Josephs label of Teenflo,made in Paris was particular suited to Ann. The style andFrench chick look, looked terrific on her slim figure. If the present was going to be jewellery, I would deal withthe manager of ´Lyons jewellers` in the Whitgift Centre,Croydon. Sometimes, If I had purchased a piece of jewelleryfrom them before that I wanted to match with another piece ofjewellery, I would go to see him and he would start looking forit. For example, I had bought Ann a cultured pearl necklacewith an exceptionally nice diamond studded clasp and nowwanted to buy her a similar pearl bracelet with a similar clasp.He had the pearls for the bracelet but not the clasp. This was inApril, so he had eight months to find the clasp. This was thetype of effort that I brought in to buying Ann a Christmaspresent. She was perfect, so I had to buy her a Christmaspresent, not only to show her how much I loved her andrespected her but also how much I appreciated and needed her. 269

Chapter 18The manager rang me twice, during this time, to let me knowof his progress in finding the right type of clasp. One monthbefore Christmas he rang me to say he had the right one. I wentover to see him. Yes, perfect. (Lyons is one of the UK’s leading jewellers and specialise ina wide range of luxurious jewellery and precious metalsincluding necklaces, pendants, bracelets and earrings. Chooseexquisite diamonds including stunning engagement, eternity,wedding and dress rings suitable for every celebration.) Occasionally I would have Tony Douche make her a pieceof jewellery. He would sometimes come to me and show mesome good quality diamonds or emeralds and ask if Annwould appreciate a necklace or a bracelet made of these stones.Over the years he created some wonderful pieces for Annwhich she wore with pride to all the fantastic venues wefrequented. To buy Angela Francis Quinn - Prentice the present Ithought was good enough for her, was a difficult job but not asdifficult, once I had purchased it as where to hide it in the houseuntil Christmas day: so she would not find it; by mistake ofcourse. If the present was jewellery, not so difficult, but one stillhad to be careful. Clothing on the other hand was a nightmare.Literally, I used to have nightmares, waking up in a cold sweat,thinking she had discovered it. But it was all worthwhile on theday. Christmas eve: Ann and I would normally go to a localrestaurant. In and around Kingswood, there were many goodrestaurants that we frequented often, all within a short drive.Indian, Chinese, Italian and English. Because of this time of theyear we would probably go to the Indian in Kingswood village:then we could park the car at the bottom of Furze Hill, pointing 270

Chapter 18it the right way, facing up the hill; so if we were really pissed,we could get in and drive up the hill with the minimum of fuss. We would pop into the Kingswood Arms first: a marvellouspub, oldie woldy with lots of atmosphere and very classy. Wewould then go on to the Indian. In the summer when we wentto this Indian restaurant, we would have a table by the widow,where across the small road you could see horses in the fields.Very pleasant on a summers evening. Back to winter. Comehome, put the music on, have a drink and open our presents,because by then it was Christmas day. We spent Christmas day quietly by ourselves with all thetrimmings. Meaning we would always have a lot ofdecorations, Christmas tree, turkey, blue cheese with port.(once opened, must be consumed within three months. Noproblem for me and Ann, we enjoyed drinking to deadlines.)When it came to food and drink, Ann always shopped at Marksand Spencer and Sainsbury, like all classy ladies do. Boxing day, we would spend with the family. This wouldconsist of my mother, my brother Alfie and his partner Sylviaand Lennie my uncle. Ann’s dad, Barny and his wife, Ella.Barny would always call our house Buckingham Palace. Wewould have dinner at our home and then later, go down to oneof the nearby pubs. We all got on very well. Sometimes withstrangers or people he was not too sure about, my brother Alfie,after a few drinks, would become argumentative. Never withthese people. We were all down to earth people and we all feltvery comfortable with one another and used to have a reallygood time, with lots of laughs. Everyone used to stay over andgo back home the next day, late afternoon. 271

Chapter 18New Year’s Eve, was the big event for me and Ann. Nutfield Priory is a four star country house hotel and spain Redhill inspired by the Neo-Gothic splendour of the Palaceof Westminster. This unique Victorian mansion house inSurrey, which dates back to 1872, delights with its stylishinteriors hung with fine paintings, unique artwork and manyoriginal features. The hotel has 15 feature bedrooms and forthat little extra indulgence, the one we always chose was theWordsworth master suite. The best one, with central views ofthe beautiful lake and grounds. I would contact the hotel six months before: to make surewe were able to book the Wordsworth and at the same timereserve the table we preferred in the dining room. We alwaysbooked for two nights: so that the next day we could comedown gently and have a quite dinner there, then depart thefollowing late morning after a substantial breakfast. We wentthere many times within the year, so they knew us quite well. On the day, Ann and I would arrive at the Nutfield at aboutthree thirty in the afternoon. Sherry in a decanter would bewaiting for us in our suite, not the usual sherry but the one theyknew we liked. We would have a glass and then unpack andhang the dress clothes that we were going to wear that evening.Then we would go down to the Grand Hall for afternoon tea.Sitting there, having a wonderful tea, in this beautiful roomwith its church like high ceilings, enormous stained glasswindows, over five hundred years old wood panelling andhuge fire place with the logs blazing in the hearth. And thesnow gently falling outside. A nice way to slowly wind downand get in the mood for the festivities to follow. Then, after alast few instructions to the manager, of what I required for theup and coming evening we departed back to our suite. Believeme, we gave the staff very good tips for all their services. 272

Chapter 18 New year’s Eve; me and Ann are in the library with all theother guests having champagne cocktails, made like onlyNutfield know how. Then we take our drinks into the GrandHall and have some marvellous oysters, a good way to whetone’s appetite. The band are playing: it’s a twelve piece band, across between jazz and indie rock and boy, does it work; theywere a terrific sound. You immediately knew that you weregoing to be on the dance floor for some time, this evening. There was two dining rooms, a big room and a moreintimate one. Ann and me always chose the more intimate one,which was called the Cloisters. We were going to get wellpissed tonight, but that was after dinner. The cloisters createdsome wonderful gourmet food and you wanted to enjoy everymorsel and you can’t, if your too well lubricated. Can only remember the main course, slices of Venison withslices of pears, dipped in a red wine sauce and of course sidevegetables. Superb, my taste buds went into raptures withparadise, or the fuck, something like that. When dinner is thatgood, you have a lovely feeling that the night could turn out tobe something to remember. It was. We had our after dinner liquors served at our reserved tablein the Grand hall where all the dancing and festivities weretaking place. There was a large sign on the table, which read´This table is reserved for Mr and Mrs Prentice` andoccasionally, when we weren’t there and someone sat down atthe table, even when it was busy, one of the staff would be over,before you could say Jack Robinson, and have them up andaway. I never fucked about, I looked after the staff well andthey knew what I wanted. The first time we hit the dance floor, it was magic. The bandwas brilliant, playing some terrific numbers. Me and Ann,waltzed and literally floated around on air. It felt like a Tolstoy 273

Chapter 18extravaganza. The dancefloor was always full and everyoneseemed to be enjoying the great sound of the band andparticularly the tunes that they chose. The singers, a man and agirl, took turns in singing and sang some songs together.Occasionally, the band would take a song and play it verydifferently from its usual sound by vibrantly mixing jazz withrock and going on terrific solos by saxophone and then electricguitar. We started talking to an elderly couple, Dennis and Liz,who were there with their son and his wife, Mike and Sue. Mikewas a solicitor, who looked like he had all the troubles of theworld on his young shoulders but said things that wereextremely funny and caught you off guard. He normally timedthe punchline, just as you were swallowing your champagneand then you had to try very hard not to choke. We were all onthe dancefloor dancing, when the time came for Big Ben tostrike the chimes for midnight. The balloons came down andeveryone kissed the person they loved. Then the pipers playedand the Scottish Haggis was wheeled in. (Haggis is a Scottishdish made of the heart, liver and lungs of a sheep or lamb,combined with oats, suet and other herbs and spices, and thencooked in a casing traditionally made of the animal's stomach.Thus, haggis is essentially a form of sausage. In the case ofhaggis, it does indeed utilize what some culinariansaffectionately term \"the nasty bits.\" Haggis is traditionallyserved with mashed potatoes and puréed turnips, acombination known as \"tatties and neeps.\" The spices used inseasoning a haggis usually include cayenne pepper, allspiceand sometimes nutmeg.) There was one incident, that slightly spoiled the evening.As the excellent young band was packing up for the night, avery arrogant and annoyed elderly man was having a right go 274

Chapter 18at them. In his evening dress, silver grey hair slightlydishevelled and in such a temper, he was a formidable sight.He was raving at the lead male singer, that he had notanswered his request for a certain song to be played. The hotelmanager and a waiter were physically holding him back, toprevent him from attacking the young man. The band weretwelve young people, including one female. Ages, I would say,twenty to thirty. All dressed immaculately. Trumpet, sax,electric guitar and piano solos and then all coming togetherwith the rest of the band which included an electronicsynthesizer to generate a frenzy on the dance floor. They alsoplayed beautiful ballads, one hauntingly sang by the girlsinger. They gave a great performance and it must have beenvery disheartening to receive this at the end. Ah well, youalways get one asshole on the night. Then we all put our overcoats on and went outside; holdinglighted torches to walk in procession and make a very large halfcircle around where the firework display would take place. Itcrossed my mind that this could be a little dangerous: youcould have easily caught fire to the person in front of you,especially as everyone, by this time, was well pissed. But noone did, so Nutfield had their no claims bonus unaffected ontheir fire and safety policy for another year. The fireworkdisplay was phenomenal, it lasted about an hour and everyonewas delighted. Many said that it was the best one they had everseen; me and Ann thought that the only other one thatcompared was the firework display on the Sea Princess cruisewith Abbey Life. After it was all over, we all went back into thehotel and made for the library bar, to have a brandy to warmus up. The time must have been about one thirty in themorning. Mike decided he felt peckish after the fresh air andordered a large plate, full of bacon butties for everyone, 275

Chapter 18whether you liked them or not. We all liked them and the platewas soon empty; amazing after all the food we had alreadyconsumed. What a marvellous time we had and now to bed. The next day we had a leisurely brunch, served in theCloisters and then went for a stroll around the wonderfulgrounds. Then back up to our room to jump in the jacuzzi andplenty of time to dress for the evening, while sipping a sherry. Of course we went to many different wonderful hotels forNew Years eve, but Nutfield was our favourite. Alsoconveniently near to our home. 276

19 The good life *Ann and me lived like this all through the year. We went to hotels like this regularly. All over Sussex and Surrey. Always in the best suites. Like Royalty, not likepop stars or celebrities, but with class like Royalty. We camefrom dire poverty and worked our guts out to get what wewanted and we got it. Everyone to their own. This was ourown, we had achieved what we set out to achieve and we weredetermined to enjoy every bit of it. This is a list of hotels westayed at many times, always in their best master suite.Alexander House Hotel and Utopia Spa, West Sussex, strikesthat fine balance between contemporary comfort and historiccharm. Cosy during every season with summer courtyardsunshine and wintry fireside lounging,Bailiffscourt Hotel. This most-convincing Medieval House withsix outbuildings (complete with gnarled 15th-century beams,gothic mullioned windows) and private parkland featuring amoat, resulted in a playground for the rich and famous of itsday.Ockenden Manor Hotel & Spa snuggles within acres of privategardens and parkland in the pretty Tudor village of Cuckfield.An Elizabethan manor house, Ockenden’s history has beentraced back as far as 1520. Initially a family home. 277

Chapter 19The Spread Eagle Hotel & Spa in Midhurst is one of England’soldest coaching inns. Dating from 1430, age-old oak beams,original open fireplaces and stained-glass windowAshdown Park Hotel and Country Club, East Sussex, breaksthe mould of the traditional, grand country hotel. Yes, it has allthe hallmarks of a stately, plush, sprawling estate but it’s alsosomehow intimate, comfortable and unpretentious. It’s a cleverbalancing act pleasing those seeking classic British hospitalityand others hankering for up-to-the-minute spa and wellnessfacilities.Amberley Castle is a unique luxury hotel located in the picturesque village of Amberley at the foot of the SouthDowns. Privately owned by Andrew and ChristinaBrownsword, this magnificent 900-year-old castle is enclosedby a 60 foot high curtain wall and portcullis that remains open,behind which you will discover an enchanting hotel offeringthe highest standards of food and service. Bedrooms areresplendent with the luxurious facilities you would expectfrom a country house hotel. I remember the stay at Amberly Castle. We were staying intheir best suite at the top of the castle, which was ok but notreally spacious enough for me and Ann. A nice view. The foodwas very good and one night after a superb dinner we got quitelubricated and continued the festivities upstairs in our suite. AsI have said, we always took our music with us and we wereplaying it pretty loud and having a good time. At about halfpast two in the morning I heard a sort of scraping rustlingsound coming up the stairs to our door, then someone wasbanging on the door. I opened it to see a man of about sixtystanding there. His totally white grey hair was literally 278

Chapter 19standing on end and he looked very scruffy. Not the sort ofclass of person you would expect to see at the Castle. He wasbreathing heavy and said, “You’re driving me mad, our suite isunder yours and I’ve been trying to get to sleep for hours, canyou turn your music off.” He didn’t say please, so I said, “Well,I’ll have to think about that.” He then attacked me, he didn’tpunch or kick thank goodness, but proceeded to rip my shirtoff my body. I just firmly stood my ground until every piece ofmy shirt was off me. Ann then stepped between us and said“fuck off were going to call the police.” While he took this in,she slammed the door in his face. I telephoned the police from the phone in our suit. Theyarrived very promptly, within fifteen minutes. We made thecomplaint against the resident below us and then they wentdown to speak to him. The following morning the managerasked us to meet him in the lounge of the hotel. Me and Annhad already decided to leave the hotel and move on tosomewhere else. While the other resident was there, theatmosphere wouldn’t be very cordial and for the money thatwe were paying it definitely had to be. The manager who was also the owner, said that he wassorry about everything that had happened and told us that theman had offered to pay for my shirt. He also said the man wasmoving on with his wife that same day. I met the man in thelibrary and talked, all was affable. He told me that the musicjust got to him and he lost control. Only a few months ago hehad, had a heart bypass operation, so he could have well donewithout this. The best part of the conversation was when heasked how much the shirt cost. I told him, seventy five pounds.A lot of money then, a lot of money now. He said that was a lotof money. I replied that the shirt was pure sea island cotton andif he wanted to see the label, would see that it was made by 279

Chapter 19Sulka’s of New Bond Street. One of, if not the most, expensivemenswear shop in the world. He understood this and paid. I felt sorry for him in a way, he was a nice enough guy, whohad just made a wrong move. He should have contacted thenight manager and asked him to ask me to turn down themusic. A night manager would have handled the situationperfectly. That’s what he’s there for. Still you have to look onthe bright side. When he banged on the door, Reggie Kraymight have opened it and then it would have cost him a lotmore than a shirt. Anyway, I had plenty more shirts and as he was leavingthere was no problem. Me and Ann stayed and had awonderful time, the restaurant was superb. Also there was aone star Micheline restaurant only a short drive away whichwas excellent. With Micheline starred restaurants, I always saythat if they have one star you can get excited. Two stars, excitedand even a little nervous of the splendour of the food thatawaits you. Three stars, it’s all about the position of the table.Gravetye Manor Hotel . Originally built for a bride as the greatbeginning for her happy ever after, this grand house wassubsequently the late William Robinson’s (father of the Englishflower garden) home for more than 50 years. It then evolvedinto the archetypal English country estate it is today, set in1,000 acres of Sussex countryside. Outside, Robinson’s world-famous horticultural workdraws attention to exquisite blooms, colours and textures.Inside, wood panelling, roaring fires, leather Chesterfields andfine works of art set the scene to create an utterly relaxingatmosphere. Spend days with walks along the lawns and to thekitchen garden. Or simply while away the time by readingbeside the fire followed by afternoon tea in the Sitting Room. 280

Chapter 19 But if all this kicking back has you itching for someexcitement, speak to the Gravetye staff to take part in deerstalking or riding the Bluebell Railway. They can also arrangetickets to nearby Glyndebourne music events. However, if youdo nothing else, reserve a table at Gravetye’s Michelin Starredrestaurant. 281

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20 Chairman’s Club *One thing I have learnt. You never get fed up with enjoyment. Being a member of Abbey Life’s CC, you went with the top 250 sales people (out of 6,000 salespeople) and their partners, to different wonderful destinationall over the world. Everything was planned in minute detail bya team of convention planners whose sole purpose was for youto have the greatest time of your life, so you would want toachieve this qualification again next year. And moreimportantly your partner would want you too. Remember,some of the top salesman were very high earners with a grossannual turnover of three to four million pounds a year (1986).They owned accountancy practises and employed charteredaccountants. With all spinoffs, company pension schemes lifecover etc. going to them. One salesman, when talking to a bigclient on the phone would always ask for his grid number: sothat he could arrive by helicopter. When the business was over,he would leave by helicopter, while three of his staff wouldshortly after, arrive in their porches to complete the paperwork. So, you can imagine how good these conventions had tobe, for these types of people to want to go on them. Well withdue respect, most people reading this, wouldn’t be able toimagine. You had to go on one; I went on twenty six. Bob Monkhouse: Jimmy Tarbuck: Frankie Howard:Jonathan Ross and many more were resident celebrities on 283

Chapter 20these conventions plus a host of musical stars. David Lloyd ranthe tennis tournament and world famous golfers ran the golftournament. Champagne, canapés and presents waiting for you in yoursuperb suite. Once a year Abbey would hire out the whole of the RoyalAlbert Hall for its CC members to be entertained; all the usualcelebs would be there. We would stay at the Hilton Hotel inBayswater and travel to the Albert Hall by red double deckerbusses, specially hired out for the occasion. I remember on one visit, I had left my box to go to the loo.When I came back I couldn’t immediately find it, so went intoseveral boxes before I found mine. Every time I walked into abox a very attractive girl would serve me a glass of champagne.I couldn’t very well refuse, could I? By the time, I reached mybox I was well gone. My wife asked me what had taken me solong, the night’s festivities hadn’t even begun. 1982. And at the age of thirty seven my first convention andthe first qualification of Chairman’s Club; life would never bethe same again. The convention was in Austria and me andAnn were really looking forward to it. But, that terrible wordagain, there was a problem! No. she wasn’t leaving me. Theproblem was that about a month before, I had visited aperspective client for the first time. They had beenrecommended to me by an existing client. They were a marriedcouple, with one child. A six month old baby boy. When themother answered the door, she told me that the baby hadchickenpox and did I still want to go into their home. Bothparents had, had chickenpox, but I hadn’t. I decided to chanceit and went in and completed the paperwork. They signed allthe relevant forms and because they had, had no serious 284

Chapter 20illnesses in their life, the life cover was in force before Ideparted. I was there for about an hour and a half. Talking about myclients, who had recommended me to them, going over thevarious plans, completing all the paperwork and then askingthem for their recommendations. It was good everydaybusiness. Good for them and good for my income. But not good for my health. A day or two later, a few redspots began showing, on my otherwise, wonderful complexion.Yes it was chickenpox; with a month to go before my firstconvention in Austria. All I remember about this illness, wasthat the red spots were very itchy and the general consensuswas that if I scratched them, they could scar me for life. Theadvantage of catching this illness, at an older age, was that, thatfact alone, stops one from scratching. If the spots became tooitchy to bear, I would gently fluff them with a soft clean whitehandkerchief and that worked. I had to grow a beard, because there was no way I couldshave. As the deadline approached, I was still feeling ill and thespots were not going, so we began to resign ourselves tomissing our first convention. I was upset, but not half as muchas Ann and I realised how clever Abbey Life was. Then all of asudden the itchiness eased and the spots weren’t as red: I beganto feel a little better. I had arranged to see the doctor four daysbefore we were due to go on the convention, to find out if I wasstill contagious. He checked me over; then gave me the all clear. We were on our way to an Abbey Life convention in Austriaand our personal holidays would never be the same again.Because once you became used to an Abbey Life convention,then all holidays had to be up to that very high standard. Theholidays cost more, which meant you had to work harder,clever Abbey Life. After three or four conventions, your whole 285

Chapter 20lifestyle went up to another level. Where eventually, whoeveryou did business with and however wealthy they were, youcould match them story for story. And if they been somewherereally exotic and expensive, there was a good chance you hadbeen there too, and in the best suite. This was one of the firmbelieves of Abbey Life that if you could live like a wealthyperson, then you could do business with them. Ann and mewent to Austria, Ann, as beautiful and classy as ever, me witha full grown beard. We came back from the initiation of our firstconvention, a lot wiser, on how to live the good life. I also cameback, without my beard. Shaven off at the end of the first week,with my wonderful complexion unblemished. Well, you knowwhat I mean! When we went to our first Abbey Life convention inAustria, on the first night, Ann and myself sat at the same tableas Michael Hepher (managing director and would later becomeMD of British Telecom) and his wife Linda. Michael said to Ann“I suppose you had some doubts initially when Roy startedwith Abbey. What with it being a totally different business andonly commission with no regular income.” Ann replied “Nonot at all. When Roy puts his mind to something, there’snothing he can’t achieve.” The whole table, of 12 peoplestopped talking. They knew, that when you have a partner likeAnn, then there’s not much you can’t achieve. 286

21 Conventions *The general procedure for all conventions were as follows. We would either fly from Gatwick Airport, or Heathrow. Mainly Heathrow. The qualifiers wouldarrive there by car hire or taxi. All fares would be claimed backfrom Abbey Life upon return, with the relevant receipts. Whenyou arrived at the Airport you would be met by Abbey Life’sconvention staff and they would take care of you from then on.Special rest rooms were there solely for Abbey associates. Allboarding cases would be checked in, and the next time youwould see them is when you arrived at your Hotel suite. Just one point here, once me and Ann went by car hire toGatwick, and it cost, something like twenty pounds. On theway back, our car hire wasn’t waiting for us, so we got a blackcab and that cost fifty four pounds. Remember , this was someyears ago. Anyway, we submitted the receipts to claim back ourfares, and was politely asked by Abbeys head office, why thedifference in fares. They said that it was best that they gave areason for the big discrepancy. We told them and of course wewere reimbursed with the whole amount. But you couldn’tblame them for asking. Say you, and about four hundred other associates, arrivedat the hotel in the afternoon. There would be an enormousbuffy and drinks awaiting you. Then you would go up to yoursuite and relax, before getting dressed for the eveningfestivities. Sometimes, there would be letters on your table, 287

Chapter 21with invitations to certain tables. Perhaps to the managingdirector and his wife table, or a famous celebrity. The letter mayremind you of the code of dress for that evening. Many nightswere evening dress where the man wore a black or whitedinner jacket with white or black bowtie and the woman woresomething too expensive. Most evenings started off with cocktails around the pool,which was always lit up brilliantly. With waiters walkingaround serving champagne cocktails. Then dinner, followed bycabaret, for example Gloria Gaynor backed by a full dancetroupe and big band. Vic Damone the Italian American singer,etc. Celebrities, Les Dawson, Bob Monkhouse, FrankieHoward, Jimmy Tarbuck, and many more came over with theconvention and stayed throughout the time we were there, andthen flew back with us. We had top sportsmen throughout theconvention, who organised the Golf and tennis tournaments.Professional photographers who took hundreds of photos ofthe convention and then they would be shown in a room whereAbbey associates could walk into at any time during the dayand order the ones of themselves or friends. Totally free. I’msure there was many other things that I was too pissed to notice,but what I do know is that we had everything you couldpossibly want, and it came first class. That was an Abbey Lifeconvention. Thanking their top associates, like no one ever didit better. On an Abbey convention in Palm Springs, we stayed at the´La Quinta luxury hotel and sports club.` We went on a cablecar up a high mountain for lunch and views. After lunch, wewere waiting for the cable car to take us back. There were aboutten couples sitting at our table. One was an Irish couple fromNorthern Ireland. The husband, Tony was a short stocky guywith a mop of black hair. He was also a bit deaf in one ear. I 288

Chapter 21said to him “What do you think of La Quinta Tony?” Heanswered, “It’s OK, but I prefer the summer.” eighteen peopleall stopped talking at the same time and laughed their headsoff. He was not a happy bunny. For the next 8 days whereverhe went on the convention, people would shout out to him “HITony, what do you prefer today, winter or summer” or “whydo you think summers better than winter.” He never talked tome again. It wasn’t my fault!In my fifth year with Abbey, my accountant advised me to bring Ann into the business. She was working full time withTelemeter installations in Croydon. The tax situation was suchthat when you put both our incomes together and then taxedthem, Ann was basically working for nothing and she wasearning good money. So, she packed her job in and became apartner in the business and of course being Ann, becameinvaluable to the business. When the tax officer came over tocheck the PAYE figures for our staff, he was stunned by herdetail and accuracy of accounts and said to me that in all hisexperience he had never seen PAYE completed so thoroughlyand correct. Our accountant, in the meantime, was not so thorough andcorrect. He had put our accounts which showed the newpartnership, into the revenue. But because of problems with hispractise: his partner, an older man had fallen ill and he had todo his workload as well, which led him to mistakenly puttingour accounts in, in the wrong year. This cost us an extra 26,000pounds tax, in 1983 that was a lot of money. I threatened to takehim to court and had my solicitor write to him, as well as megoing to see him every 2-3 days. As well as this, he had falleninto further debt because of his business situation. Eventually I 289

Chapter 21re-mortgaged him to raise the extra money to save his businessand pay me the 28,000 pounds. 2,000 pound for the worry. Ilinked his mortgage to a pension mortgage, which of course Igot commission; on the mortgage and the pension. So I cameout of it very well and also saved his practice. During this time, me and Ann had joined the Purley Tennisclub. A strange club where the women took their tennis moreseriously than the men. A very well kept tennis club withsuperb grass and red courts. One match I remember, was whenMike Keating, my doubles partner and me played a third-round tie of the Surrey clubs tournament at nine am on aSaturday morning. Just stopped raining, a cold and miserableday. Our two opponents were guys we had never met before.They were both six footers and made the Kray brothers looklike quire boys. From the beginning, they gave a very menacingpresence. As the game progressed they became even morenastier. I personally was very pleased that we were losing.Every time we won a point, I wished we hadn’t. I have no ideawhy they were like this, they were very good players and wonin straight sets. You had the feeling that if we had won, theywould have asked us to sign a paper saying we had lost. If theyhad met Illie Nastase in the next round, he wouldn’t have gotpast the first game. While I was at the Purley Tennis Club, I met Graham Buddwho was also a member. We used to play one another at singlesand we were both very competitive. He had a tremendous firstserve but as he was about six feet, five inches tall this was onlyto be expected. You just had to make sure that you made themost of his second serve. We were pretty even, with himperhaps just having the edge. We also played together as adoubles partnership in some league games for the club. 290

Chapter 21 He was solicitor, a partner of Owen White & Catlin of theShepperton offices and eventually became my solicitor. Oneday he invited me and Ann to his mother’s house on a Sundayafternoon to play tennis. A lovely detached house in its owngrounds with beautiful manicured gardens and a tennis court.The day was perfect, sunny, warm and no wind. It was the firsttime we had met his girlfriend who was partnering him. Shewas Indian or half Indian and English but what I am sure ofwas that she was very beautiful and had a wonderfulpersonality; me and Ann took to her immediately. We reallyenjoyed the game, it was fairly competitive but moreimportantly we just had fun and there was a lot of laughs.Afterwards, we had a lovely tea that Graham’s mum preparedfor us, sandwiches and homemade cream cakes, and as weenjoyed it we chatted and laughed about various bits of theafternoons tennis. It’s a day I always remember, simplybecause it was so nice and everyone was so happy.Boca Raton Convention, 1984 at the Boca Raton, Resort and Club. Below are snippets about this wonderful resort. Enjoy exclusive dining experiences, inspired flavours,award-winning catering services and legendary surroundingsat this architecturally striking South Florida resort. Discoverthe art of cuisine at our array of restaurants presenting diningopportunities to suit every mood and event.Relax in the warm sea breeze by the Tower Pool with a colddrink and poolside dining at Shake Bar & Grill or unwind witha delicious cocktail at The Palm Court, offering fantastic viewsof the Intracoastal Waterway. Savour Mediterranean cuisine at Florida's renownedrestaurant, Lucca and appreciate the stylish Bar Luna. Indulge 291

Chapter 21in internationally acclaimed cuisine at Morimoto Sushi Bar or[take in breath-taking views of Boca and beyond from The Blue,located on the 27th floor of the Tower. Guests are also welcometo dine at the Boca Beach Club restaurants including theoceanfront Sea Grille, boasting stunning views and a menufeaturing the freshest seafood dishes. To dine at the resort and the beach club all reservationsmust be escorted by a hotel guest or member. Only hotel guestsand members are permitted on property Reviewed September 10, 2017 Brought my wife to the BocaResort for her birthday. Noted the special occasion in thebooking comments and received a double upgrade to a balconyroom in the Yacht Club overlooking the intracoastal waterway.The room was elegant, luxurious, and large. The bathroom washuge, all marble, with a glass rainfall shower and a separatedeep-soaking tub. It was like being in a palace. The diningoptions were almost too many to choose from. Severalrestaurants and specialty cafes (like Serendipity’s Sweet Shop,to Morimoto's Sushi Bar), with exquisitely prepared andpresented dishes. Waldorf Astoria’s take great pride in theirgourmet dining and every meal we ate, from the fabulous steakat The Blue (a glass walled restaurant on the 25th floor of thetallest building in Boca) to the heavenly warm pretzel bitesdelivered to our room by the 24-hour room service crew.Everything was absolutely delicious. My only complaint is thatthere shouldn't be a scale in the bathroom, to remind us not toeat so much!!!! LOL. The hotel and grounds are so magnificentwith an interesting and impressive history. And lastly the staffwere constantly there at our service to meet our every need anddesire. My wife and I are in our 60's and have travelledextensively during our lives. We can honestly say that we have 292

Chapter 21NEVER enjoyed any stay at any property more than our recentstay at the Boca Resort! Sanomor, well I will say a little more. After the conventionended, me and Ann stayed on at the Boca Raton resort, foranother ten days and became friends with an American couple.I don’t remember their names, so let’s call him Bob and her,Jane. Bob was about forty years of age and Jane was twentythree. I don’t know why, but I remember her age. They hadrecently been married and were at the resort on a sort of secondhoneymoon. Jane was a very beautiful girl, brown curly hairdown to her shoulders. A lovely healthy figure and a very nicesmile. If I had just married her, I wouldn’t have been playingtennis, well I hope by now, you would know, where I wouldhave been. Anyway, me and Ann played a lot of tennis with them.Then one day he said to me, Roy, I’ll give you a game of singles.Best of three sets and whoever wins, the other one pays uptwenty dollars. I thought he was quite good, but I was better.In the mixed doubles, I had held back to be sociable and makeit more enjoyable for everyone. Perhaps he had done the same.We were now going to find out. We arranged the match for sixthirty in the evening, because at that time the climate wasbecoming a little cooler. Still hot but cooler. I went down to the courts at six fifteen. Ann decide that thiswas a good time to sort a few things out in our apartment andsend a few postcards. Bob had brought Jane with him to watch.She wore the shortest white tennis dress I had ever seen, andI’ve seen some short ones. She looked absolutely gorgeous. Atfirst, when she bent over to pick up a tennis ball, I thought shehad no panties on. I nearly said to Bob that I would gladly handover a hundred dollars or more, if we could have a threesomein the changing rooms, but somehow refrained. She had panties 293

Chapter 21on that were so tiny you could see her wonderful brown pubichairs sprouting out all over. Even without bending over, therewas no doubt that she had one of the best bums on planet earth. I was four games to love down in the first set, before I evenrealised the game had started; every time I looked her way shegave me a wonderful smile. The first two games, I played witha handicap. The biggest hard on you’ve never seen. Then Ibecame a little bit pissed off about the underhanded way hehad weakened my game, so I got my act together. I’m a verycompetitive person, which sometimes borders on the insaneand here I was losing a match with Bob, and beautiful Jane,knowing that their underhanded plan had achieved exactlywhat they had wanted. There was one thing that they hadn’taccounted for, my incredible will to win. Hi Yo Silver. I pulled back to four all. The next two games went on for along time. Four or five deuces each, with me eventuallywinning both games to take the first set. He was a broken man,he realised that I was not only a better player but also a muchfitter one. At the beginning of the second set, I remember apoint that finished him of. The score was one game all. He wasforty love down on his serve. He hit a deep hard backhand tomy forehand, I just used the speed of his shot to slice it back tohim and as he came to the net, the speed and undercut spin justwiped out his focus and practically brought him to his knees.We both knew he was done for and I went on to win the match,Six – four, Six – one. Me and Ann didn’t see too much of them,after that.Rome, Italy: was the next convention. I will always remember the Roman night. We had been out during theday on a sightseeing tour arranged by Abbey. When we arrived 294